Chapter Text
Hey Sara,
So Lexi suggested I write these periodically to you so you have "A solid foundation to get settled upon once waking” (Her words, not mine) to give you an idea of what’s been happening since we got here. It’s not a terrible idea, I guess. The Hot Doctor can't be completely wrong, can she? Plus I think she thinks she can get a better idea of how I tick too.
(If that’s true, and you’re reading this Lexi, I absolutely will not apologize for describing you as hot to my sister. Stop being nosey.)
A lot has happened since we went to sleep 600 years ago. I wish I could say it had been quiet, a smooth trip to the other side of time and a new galaxy. Unfortunately that'd be lying, and.. well.. I know I told you about all this. About Dad and how things didn’t pan out with the whole "wake up to a new homeworld" promise the Initiate painted. I’m sorry.
Harry’s still mad at me that I didn’t make up some bullshit story, but like.. how am I supposed to lie to the other half of me? I haven't lied to you once in the 23 (six hundred and something) years we've been alive. I'm not about to start now. Besides if you found out I had lied you'd probably kill me, so.
Like I said, Habitat 7 didn’t pan out, but really almost none of the golden worlds have. Dads gone, and they put me in charge of the Pathfinder team, which… I mean, you’ve met Cora. She’s surprisingly good at not being mad at me, even though she’s absolutely pissed. Hell I'm mad for her. I couldn’t exactly turn it down though.
It's just one more thing Dad never fucking told us. Just the icing on the cake. I'm sure you didn't know, because you would have warned me, but also did you know we both went through gene altering therapy when we were sedated for cryo? Because apparently its standard procedure for any pathfinder and their second/third.
Like Cora. Who should have gone through the therapy but didn't/wasn't even aware that it was a THING. Because fuck you Alec Ryder knows best, that's why. He forged our signatures, Sar. Didn't even have the balls to just tell us about it. Or warn us about it. Or SOMETHING. Just what ever the fuck dad wants is what dad gets. Screw the consequences. And once Lexi, Harry, SAM and I all figured out that Dad had forged our signatures?
I am so angry, but I mean.. I know he was trying to keep us safe, too? And I can't tell if I should curse him in every language and hope someone's god hears it, or be grateful that he did. If he hadn’t then you probably would have died when your pod was disabled. Hell, I would have on Habitat 7 even without his intervention…
Still I mean.. what the fuck Dad? With the amount of bullshit you and I went through as kids? With my biotics? And mom's illness? Them treating you like a control group test dummy for all those years? And he just.. forges our signatures and puts us through medical hell because he's decided it's best for us. Doesn't even consult us. Just like always. if Lexi wasn’t so damned "normal person" I’d have spaced her ages ago. I fucking hate doctors.
I dunno, Sar. I wish it had been some kind of surprise that Dad would pull this kind of shit, but it's not. Just another disappointment to stack on the pile. Alec Ryder, the one makes life or death choices for everyone and fuck you if you don't agree because he's the N7, the Soldier, the First Contact Hero, the Military Atashe for Humanity.
Yanno, mister fucking perfect till he got himself discharged and both of us hard fucked. But it's fine right? It'll be fine. Dad knows best. Swallow the bitter pill. It's good for you, son. He spent so many years pushing me into the Alliance. Military school, Junior Marines, biotic boot camp, N School?
Just.. anything and everything to get me to follow in his footsteps. Sure. Until he goes and pushes AI on the Alliance because Alec Knows Best. The damn irony of it all is I was really looking forward to it, yanno? Maybe dad had been right, much as I hated i, but I was a GOOD fuckin soldier, even if it wasn't what I had wanted as a kid. Found my niche and was really flying and then…
Two years as a real marine, that's all I got. Two full years of being halfway decent at something for once in my life. Actually starting to enjoy it. Really wrap my head around the idea that yeah, I am good at this, could be GREAT at it with work.
Then dad happened, cause fuckin of course dad happened. Boom. Every single door shut. In our faces, right? You know all this. It wrecked your career too. All the commendations and my N1 meant shit compared to Alec Ryder Messing With AI.
I got stuffed into the corner. Relay duty. Put the freaky biotic son of crazy Ryder out of sight where we don't have to worry about him anymore. Can't hurt anyone if you don't even have a gun. Sorry. Just.. venting. It's not as if it was any better for you either. But at least you got to pick what you wanted to do with your life…
Not that they didn’t fucking owe that to you. Or at least Dad. Mom tried to shield us from the worst of it. Went into the field because it was the best way to keep us safe. Dad though.. I mean, I was never your fault Sarebear. Never was gonna be mad at you for getting to have the choice to pick what you wanted out of life, yanno?
You of all people deserved to be free. Besides, shit assignments aside, I always loved that you could come visit me up at Charon. I dunno if I told you but like half my unit wanted to give it to you. They wouldn’t have dared attempted, but they did want to.
Yanno, the half I wasn't sleeping with, anyway. Only good things that came out of my time there was not having to worry about the consequences of breaking regs and getting to spend more time with you.
Anyway I'm supposed to be telling you all about the bullshit I've been dealing with now, not remenising about the mountain of hot people I was fucking after dad fucked our careers, right? I mean.. There was that one guy who.. nevermind.
Anyway, the reason I couldn't just turn down the Pathfinder job is because Dad swapped SAM into my implant. I guess part of the "Pathfinder treatment" that all Pathfinders and their seconds get are specialty implants that house’ SAM. And he did something. “He” being SAM, I mean.
SAM’s situation with the implant, and me almost dying to toxic air and brain damage from the fall I took changed the way my brain works. And he's just kind of a part of me now. Full time. SAM is just living in my head.. I guess? Lexi and SAM both tried to explain it to me, and I'm sure you'd probably understand it better then I do. I'm a soldier, not a scientist like you and mom, so I don’t really get it.
Anyway, the short version is, if we tried to remove him, I'll die. So I'm the Pathfinder, and Cora's not. And that’s kind of it, I guess. Being the Pathfinder is, a lot honestly. I did manage to settle my first outpost.
Or, no I didn’t really settle anything. I actually just killed a shipload (hah) of bad guys and turned on an old ass atmosphere scrubber sort of? You’d have loved to see it and I honestly can’t wait till you wake up so I can show it to you. SAM helped.
But we did make it safe and clean and then the Nexus settled the outpost, which was cool to see. It was nuts watching how fast all the prefabs went down once the order was given. I should tell you about Addison sometime, but if Lexi is reading this maybe I’ll hold off just in case she reports me to the brass.
Never can tell with those shifty doctor types.
Anyway, Eos has Prodromos now and it’s a science hub cause it’s what you would have chosen. Because they let me choose. Because they’re nuts and think I’m some kind of responsible person able to make those kinds of choices and not just a horny as fuck 20 something looking to shoot some motherfuckers and suck some dick.
I MEAN the other option was to have the military show up in force and even though it’s probably a good idea, we do have PLENTY of people to shoot at bad guys already thanks to the situation on the Nexus - long story I’ll tell you later.
I also got to meet a new alien species. Or, well, I guess we’re the aliens here but the Angara are really cool. I’ve got one on my ship now (Yeah I have my own ship, eat it). Jaal. I am kind of dying to introduce you. Because I know how much you were looking forward to Mingling with the Locals (please don’t hit me).
There’s a lot more, but I think instead I’m just going to say - Sarebear, I miss you so much it hurts. I can’t wait till you wake up fully and are running around kicking ass and terrorizing everyone like the pomeranian that you absofuckinglutely are. We can sit back, relax, and figure out who the hottest folks on the Nexus are (By species, gender, and cool factor right?). Then we can go exploring, anywhere you want.
Just.. wake up soon, okay Sarebear?
Love you,
Scotty