Chapter Text
Keigo Takami sighed. He sat on the ledge of the rooftop of some building that he didn’t even think to find the name of. The wind tickled his face and brushed past him, the smell of the city hitting against him.
He looked down on the twinkling lights of the city, the night sky filling the air around him. Normally he liked patrols, he could kick back and fly to his heart’s content. Soaring above the clouds and watching civilians go about their business as he flew far above them.
He always felt a nice sense of peace flying, he felt safe, needed. He felt like no one could touch him when his wings flapped hard against the wind. Maybe it was also him craving that bit of freedom he wanted so bad, maybe it helped him feel like his own person, if only for a moment.
Tonight, however, was different. Tonight his mind was fixated on one specific person.
You.
Keigo and you had been friends for years, going back to when he first started to become a hero. Him trying to be a hero, and you trying your best to find a stable life.
At first, your friendship was more of a spur of the moment thing, neither of you wanted to really commit to a relationship (friendship or otherwise). You both just enjoyed each other's company, finding it easy to let go around one another. Both of you expected your friendship not to last very long, that was the unspoken agreement you two had. That you both would just have fun, but there were no set rules in your relationship.
But here you two were, years later, still friends. Your relationship with each other was always so fun, never a dull moment.
Keigo had never had a real friend, and honestly? It lived up to the hype. Hanging out with you was always the highlight of his days. You just had an effect on him, you made him feel wanted, not because he was a hero, but because he was Keigo. He wouldn’t change it for the world, the way you looked at him with such adoration, with such genuine caring, he couldn’t help but feel like every second with you was one of pure joy. However, Keigo supposed that, down the line, he had started to become more and more attached to you.
He didn’t remember when, specifically, he just knew he loved your presence. He loved when you laughed at his shitty jokes, scolded him after missions. Overall, you had made him feel wanted. And that was something he didn’t feel all that often, you made him feel like he didn’t have to be Hawks, he could be him. It was so refreshing to be by you, to have someone he genuinely cared for.
He absolutely loved having you in his life.
But he supposed that was the problem, because he had started to fall in love with you.
He had never been in love before, so at first, he didn’t understand his feelings. So when he got that feeling in his chest, that warm, perfect feeling? He wasn’t sure what to do. But he caught on pretty quickly. He’s very Perceptive, of course, the commission had to have him be that way, for him to be useful. So, he figured out his feelings for you, realizing what they meant for him, and for you.
He knew he felt something when you told him about a coworker that kept flirting with you.
You told him that your co-worker wouldn’t leave you alone, no matter how many times you told him no, the coworker would continue flirting. It angered him because this guy made his friend feel uncomfortable. But that anger turned to jealousy, jealousy because he wanted to flirt with you. He wanted to make you blush and make you giggle at the cheesy pickup lines he would say to you in order to win your heart. But he couldn’t. He didn’t know why, but whenever he thought of saying something like that, his heart seemed to pound fervently against his chest, his mouth feeling as dry as sandpaper. It was as if the words just wouldn’t come out. He wanted to, oh he wanted to, but a part of him didn’t want to ruin anything. This was his first friendship, he...he didn’t want to lose you.
He looked up at the night sky. He sighed to himself, he told himself the words he kept repeating to himself since he realized his feelings. This is for the best, and, just push it down. If you two did start dating, he would be so anxious that someone would hurt you. He would be so anxious you would find someone better than him. He would be so anxious about how the commission would force him to cut you off altogether. He could practically hear them, “This relationship is just a distraction. You're a hero, you don’t have time for silly games, Hawks.” So he kept you at arm's length. Just enough to enjoy your friendship, but not enough to where he could have what he really wanted. Which was you, all to himself. For you to be his, for him to be with you.
He couldn’t lie, it hurt.
His heartfelt like it was on fire, like his desire for you became too much, and all he wanted to do was just tell you how he felt. How you were perfect, how much he cared about you, how amazing he thought you were, how he knew he could give you the perfect life if you just asked.
He felt his phone buzz in his pocket, bringing him back to reality. He picked it up, expecting it to be one of his sidekicks telling him about some villain attack that he had to go and take care of. But to his surprise, it was you.
“Hey Hawks,” his heart quickened just by your voice alone, and although it was cheesy, his wings puffed out just due to excitement.
“Heya (Y/N) what’s up? Did you totally forget that I have patrol tonight?” He asked in a teasing tone.
He heard you, ohhh, in remembrance, “Sorry, I was wondering why you didn’t invite me out for chicken tonight. Do you need me to go?’
He thought for a moment before responding.
“Na, in fact, it’s pretty boring here. Nothing interesting is happening” He said in his normal, charismatic voice.
“Now come on chickie, tell your favorite hero what’s eaten at ya.”
He heard your giggles through the phone. God did he love hearing them.
“Ok ok, well I don’t know if you’re my favorite hero,” you said in a teasing tone.
He acted hurt by your words, “Oh how you wound me! I thought we were friends!”
You giggled again on the other line, making his smile soften a little.
“Ok ok, I actually do need your help,” you said, “I just need some advice,”
“Advice huh,” Hawks looked up at the stars. “Ok lay it on me kiddo.”
You scoffed at the nickname, “first, stop calling me kiddo. Secondly, it's about a guy.”
Hawks could almost hear his heart stop, his mind frozen in time.
He knew he should have expected this, it was only a matter of time. He knew eventually you would find someone, it was bound to happen. But that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt.
Being in a friendship with you was dangerous enough. He needed to keep you at arm's length so you wouldn’t get hurt. Maybe this guy was a blessing in disguise, maybe this was just what he needed, just what you needed. You didn’t need him, and you shouldn’t need him. He would just bring you pain. Push it down, he repeated to himself, just put on a smile.
So that’s what he did.
He hummed a little into the phone and smiled, “Wow Chickie, didn’t realize you had a boyfriend already. Or were you planning on keeping him a secret from your best friend?”
Friend, that’s what he had to be to you.
You laughed a little on the other line, “He’s not my boyfriend, he just asked me out, that’s all. And I don’t know if I should say yes or not. I mean, he’s nice enough, he’s not as funny as you are that for sure.”
He couldn’t help the leap of his heart.
You continued, “he’s definitely not my first choice, but I thought, I don’t know, maybe I should just give it a try? So do you think I should say yes to his offer to take me out?”
He thought about it for a sec, then answered, “Well, I’ve never met the guy. But from your description, he sounds pretty mediocre at best. Honestly, if you don’t think you're gonna be happiest with him, then maybe he’s not the one,” he pursed his lips and paused.
But, maybe that was just the jealousy talking. No, he needed to be like a friend to you, and that was just friendly advice… right?
“That being said, you never know! Maybe this guy is just what you need! And honestly,” push it down, “I'll support you no matter what! Just don’t forget about me, ok?”
You sighed, “First, that’s what I knew you would say. Secondly, thank you Hawks, I’ve always counted on your advice. And third, I could never forget about you, your way too much off a hard ass.”
Keigo let out a hearty laugh, “Hardass huh? You're so mean sometimes.”
He could almost feel your eye roll through the phone, “It's true though, whenever I say I’m not down to hang out you come over anyways. I’m thinking about having the locks changed on my doors because of you.”
“Awwww don’t be like that, you love me,” he said, smirking a little.
“Yeah yeah. Oh,” he heard an alarm go off in the distance off the phone call. “Looks like dinner’s done, I guess I have to leave you.”
“Boo, don’t go.” He whined.
“Don’t be a baby, besides you're on patrol. Get back to work.” You lectured.
He chuckled, “You have a point.”
“Ok well, I have to go, promise me you'll be safe?” You sounded a bit worried, he knew being friends with him could sometimes be hard work. Having to constantly watch the news coverage of him getting hurt, he knew it was probably not the best thing to see.
“I promise. Eat well ok?”
“Ok, bye bird boy.”
He chuckled, “Bye-bye kiddo.”
You hung up.
He put his face in his hands. For one moment he allowed himself to feel. He allowed himself to feel heartache, to feel want, to feel jealousy. But only for a moment. Only for a moment.
Then he had to be Hawks again, he had to push it down.