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Chapter 1

Summary:

Umis is terribly bored working as a barmaid in a tavern, dealing with rowdy customers on a daily basis. Then she meets Marcus, and things get interesting.

NOTE: There's LOTS of liberties done with Umis's description

Work Text:

Umis sighed, swirling the ale in someone's old pint mug around in a clockwise motion. She listened to the hustle and bustle in the tavern around her. She let out a sigh again as Crackle scurried up to her, his talons clapping against the wooden floor. He chirped excitedly, tugging at her skirt.
"Yeah, I know, lad." She mumbled, her words barely audible over the roar of the crowds within the tavern. The redheaded goblin carried the dishes at the table over to the kenku triplets. They all chorused a cheery greeting as she dropped the dishes off beside them. Umis smiled weakly at the kids before walking off to take the orders of some already rowdy dwarves. On her way to the table, she bumped into a man. He was fairly tall, with a cigarette in his mouth and a large sword in a black leather hilt strapped to his back. His long, straight, snow-white hair swayed as he walked.
"So sorry, sir!" The ginger apologized profusely to the elf.
"It's fine." He said with a shrug. The goblin jogged to keep up with him, prioritizing his order over the dwarves'.
"What can I get fer ya?" She asked in a thick Irish accent. Umis grinned, bearing her, pointy tusks.
"A pint of ale and the special." The elf grumbled. Umis trotted off to fetch his order, trying her best to ignore the now angered and drunk dwarves. She hurried back to the table, keeping her teal eyes off of the table to her right.
"here ya go. Now I haven't seen you 'round here, mister. I'm Umis, nice to meetcha. You an adventurer?" The stout girl asked, brimming with curiousity as she sat down with her own pint of ale.
"I'm Marcus. I'm here looking for a job, but it seems all the work available here requires a party." He sighed. "You looking for a better paying job than working at this dump?"
Umis' ears perked up. "Oh, well I'm not really paid. And I'd love to, but I can't just leave the triplets!" She said, her wide smile quickly faltering.
"The triplets?" Marcus asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Yeah!" Umis smiled again. She made two clicking sounds. Out of nowhere, three kenku children popped up. The children were wearing identical outfits out of peasant’s clothing. One had bright sky blue eyes, one had leaf green eyes, and the other had yellow eyes.
“Meet Snap, Crackle, and Pop!” Umis giggled as the triplets formed into a pyramid.
“Oh… okay. I’m not sure if there’s any jobs suitable for children, but we’ll see.” Marcus mused as he got up to check the board beside the table of dwarves. Umis skipped to keep up in her heeled boots to keep up with him. After a bit of scouring the board, Marcus mumbled something about all the jobs posted not being suitable for kids.
Umis smirked. “The triplets aren’t average kids.” She sighed, placing her weight on one foot.
“Hey, wench!” It was the dwarves. The goblin turned around to face the brutes. The brunette was already invading her personal space, lifting up her short skirt.
“Don’t be disgusting.” The goblin snorted and picked up the dwarf by his beard. “I wouldn’t sleep with a thug like you.”
The small man snarled at her, with a hungry look in his eyes. “Sure you wouldn’t, slut. You’d sleep with any man if his cock is long enough.” He smirked at her. “ ‘Cha like to see mine?”
Marcus shook his head in disbelief. “That’s bloody disgusting.” Umis nodded in a greement. She smiled at the dwarf and brough her hand down to his crotch. The thug blushed.
“Maybe later.” She said. “Though I would love it even more if you left me alone.” She continued her voice taking on a coyingly sweet tone. The goblin then proceeded to punch the pervert in the balls.
“Don’t make me whoop your arses.” Umis scowled. She angrily dropped the brown haired dwarf and watched the other two scurry away in horror.
“Wow. You’re tough as nails.” Marcus smirked. “Yeah, I think you and the kids would be a great addition to our new crew.
Umis chuckled. “That’s good, ‘cause you didn’t have much of a choice!” Marcus rolled his eyes.
“Alright then.” Marcus turned back around and pulled off a poster listing. “Says here that a nobe lost a precious heirloom and wants it returned to him. Says he needs a group of folk to retrieve it for him. Sound good to you guys?” He looked over to the Umis and the kids, seeing the kids nod eagerly.
“Yeah. Sounds great! One problem, I don’t have any gear.” Umis nervously laughed. “I’ll check with the barkeep.” She walked up to the bar to talk to the old man running it.
“Hey Silas, I know you probably don’t wanna hear this, but I’m going to go on a quest with some buddies. You have any adventuring gear I could use?” She inquired anxiously.
“Yes, in fact, I do. And you’re welcome to have it, Mimi. Let me get it for you.” The old man smiled at Umis. He disappeared into the back of the shop and came back shortly afterwards holding a bag of tools and equipment.
“I used to be an adventurer, too, Mimi. This was my old gear. I have no use for it anymore, and I think you should have it.” He looked at the girl with a twinkle in his eye as he handed her the bag.
“Thank you so much, Silas. I’ll make sure I come back to help you once in a while!” She smiled at him and went to join her friends.

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