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Chapter Text

It had to be somewhere around here. Asgore said that there should be a few vials of DT left in the medical tent. Gaster glanced behind him to see how Sans was holding up, and he didn't look good. The skeleton had lost his right eye thanks to a shot from a human mage, and with it had come a gaping hole through his head.

Gaster had rushed to the front lines to get Sans out of there, but as soon as he got to the front he had noticed he was too late. Soldiers were running towards him as he had rushed to the beaten up skeleton, who looked like he was dusting away with the gentle breeze.

Nothing in this drawer either. Despair was starting to get the better of him as his appendage hands flew around the medical tent, making more of a mess rather than helping. Few of them were gently holding Sans' hand and face, as if in an attempt to heal him with affection alone.

It didn't do anything of course.

When he picked up the small frail body, panic tried to take hold of him, but he had to stay calm, for his sake. Gaster came to the conclusion that in his current state of mind, he'd need help, so that he wouldn't do anything stupid. 

Asgore could surely help.

One of the appendages found a syringe, but it was empty, same as the other few vials he had managed to find laying around. Asgore had said there would be some here, so where are they?

A monster from the medical staff enters the tent.

"Doctor Gaster? What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be at the main base?"

"Oh, thank the stars, help me out here, I need to find DT extract to-"

"Why are you looking for DT extract here? We ran out of it yesterday and are waiting for the next delivery from the main base, so why aren't you there helping with the production?"

Gaster stops and looks at the monster with hollow eyes as dread fills his insides.

"...Ran out? RAN OUT?! OF THE ONE THING KEEPING US ALIVE AGAINST THE HUMANS? MY ONLY HOPE FOR SAVING HIM!?" 

The other monster looks to where Gaster's hand is pointing and sees the nearly dusted skeleton.

"No, No, NO!" Gaster rushes next to Sans and sees that everything below his ribcage had already dusted. "No- Sans, please wake up, you can't let everything end like this!"

There is no response whatsoever. Not a single sound to indicate that he is reacting on any level. It's as if he was already gone, but that couldn't be it, there had to still be a chance to make things right. He was still here, he had to be.

The other monster looks at the Doctor, who is now in a shock, just gently petting what was left of the skeleton's body. But he wasn't crying, no, he was staring the skeleton's empty eye socket, seemingly waiting for a sign.

Anything.

But nothing happened.

"Please," Gaster said as he watched Sans' shirt go flat as one rib after another disappears to thin air, "Don't leave me like this."

The sound of a shattering soul fills his mind, as a relentless river of tears starts to fall along his cheeks, accompanied by a blood freezing screech.

The medical staff monster backed slowly towards the exit of the tent and then started running as fast as they could. The chilling echo of the wailing would stay with them for a long time.

Chapter Text

He stormed through the barracks of the main base towards the king.

He wanted answers.

"Asgore," Gaster said, his fists shaking as he tried to control himself. "I need a word with you, right now."

The king looked at him confused. "My dear friend, you know that I cannot leave my position as of now, and I really do not have the time no matter how much I wish to hear what you have to say."

"It wasn't a request, my king." The words were filled with malice and spite. Asgore looked at the trembling doctor, and nodded slightly.

"Hmm, fine, it seems that this matter needs to be dealt with now."

The two of them retreat to the king's tent, and as soon as Asgore closes the entrance, Gaster lashes out at him.

"Why didn't you tell me we had run out of DT extract!? You made me go to the other side of the battlefield, running in circles! I watched the one I hold dear dust before my eyes!"

Tears were now freely falling down on Gaster's face, but Asgore just shrugged.

"That is, unfortunately, how life goes during a war dear friend."

He walked towards the doctor and continued, "This... friend of yours, just wasn't cut out for this kind of thing. You did your best, and I'm here to help you get over it the best I can."

He lifted Gaster's trembling face to meet his eyes, but Gaster smacked his hand away.

"Get over it!? GET OVER THIS!? How could I!? If I hadn't been withhold crucial information on our DT supply, there wouldn't be anything to get over of!"

Asgore looked a bit insulted. "Withold information? Are you actually accusing me for your friends dusting? Dear stars, grieve has made you irrational, friend."

Gaster stared down on the king with venom in his eyes, "Yes, yes I am friend. There is simply no way you hadn't known that the medical unit needed a new supply, and yet you sent me to that tent, knowing full well I wouldn't find anything there."

He was trying to hold himself together, fearing that if he didn't, he would try to kill the king before getting any answers.

The king stroked his beard, and the silence was deafening until he finally started to speak.

"Nothing escapes your calculating mind, does it my dear?" He took a few steps closer, and Gaster could feel dread taking hold of himself yet again. "Fine then, I did know of the shortage, but I had my reasons for deceiving you in this way."

"What could possibly be a good enough excuse for-"

A hand slams him to the king's desk and knocks the breath out of him as Asgore continues.

"The excuse would be that this friend was holding you back," he proceeds to caress Gaster's face gently. "I couldn't just stand there and watch you waste yourself with an inferior monster like him."

"You- I trusted you! You were my oldest friend, how could you do this to me, to him!?"

Asgore put his finger on Gaster's lips.

"It's because I love you, and cannot stand the thought of you ruining your life. I did it so that nothing would stand between us, my dear friend."

Gaster felt a piece of his soul crack away as the king embraced and kissed him deeply.

Chapter Text

He woke up to his own screams yet again, gasping for air as he tried to calm himself down, saying that it was okay, he was fine. It was just the same nightmare he'd seen since the incident.

Gaster was still shaking a bit when he got up. There was no way he could sleep tonight anymore, that was certain. He went to grab his jacket and went for a night walk.

Grillby is cleaning the counter, ready to close for the night when the door opens and Gaster walks in, stumbling a bit.

"Hey Grillby, I- I know it's late, but could you get me cup of the usual?"

The doctor looks shaken up, like he often does when he comes by this late. Grillby knows of his friends nightmares and nods, gesturing him to sit down at the counter.

Seemingly relaxing a bit, Gaster takes a seat and thanks the bartender. Grillby hands the doctor a cup of tea, a special blend he had made to help calm the nerves.

Gaster drinks a few sips and takes a shaky breath.

"Was it the same nightmare again?" Grillby asks, and waits for him to reply.

Gaster sighs, sounding defeated. "Yes... this always happens whenever I've had to meet with him."

His hands begin shaking mentioning him, and Grillby places his hand over Gaster's, running his thumbs gently over the backs of the doctors hands.

"I wish I could do more to help," Grillby says, lifting the other hand to his mouth and gives it a gentle kiss. "I hate to see you suffer like this."

Blushing lighly, Gaster pulls away his hands and finishes his drink while the two of them stay in silence.

Then Grillby speaks up.

"You know that you could always come live here, right? My door is always open for you."

The doctor looks surprised.

"What's this about all of a sudden?" Gaster says, knowing full well what this was about. Grillby had offered to house him for years now.

It had begun after an especially horrid meeting with the king. That day he confided in the bartender, he had told to him everything from the beginning, of the nightmares, and about what the king truly did at each and every meeting with him...

Gaster looks into Grillby's eyes with what looks like regret and sorrow. He wanted to love this monster so badly, but he hadn't been able to move on. He just couldn't, not before he could somehow pay back for all the king had done.

And Grillby knew this.

Noticing the storm of memories gathering inside his friends head, Grillby tells Gaster to try and forget he mentioned it.

Then Grillby takes Gaster's hands into his, and looks straight at him with a small, gentle and sincere smile.

"I'm sorry, I know we've talked about this before, and I know your reasons, but still, I will be here for you whenever you need me."

Gaster sighs. "I know, I know, and... thank you. I'm- I'm not sure I could take this any longer if it wasn't for you."

They are both blushing slightly, and Grillby inches towards the doctor.

"Gaster, I-"

He's interrupted as Gaster pulls his hands away swiftly.

"It's- it's really late, I need to get going, thank you for tonight Grillby." 

He gets up and walks out the door, leaving Grillby behind. The bartender feels his soul ache, as the door closes.

Chapter Text

It had been months since Gaster's visit and Grillby was getting more anxious by the day. He wanted to give the doctor the space he needed, but he's never had to wait for him this long. 

Had Asgore done something to him?...

Grillby shook his head, trying to get the thought out. Gaster had told him how dependent the king had become of him, so there should be no reason for anything worse than what has been going on to happen.

"Hey, did you hear the rumors yeah?" said a monster to another sitting next to them at the counter, "the royal scientist, that he's fallen down?"

A glass falls to the ground, shattering to a thousand pieces. The monsters in the bar turn to look at Grillby.

He asks the monster where they had heard the rumor.

"Why do you care?" The monster asks with a nonchalant smirk, "is he your boyfriend or something?"

Grillby felt a sting in his soul. 

He stood there, shaking, until he bolted towards the exit, accompanied by the confused and worried questions by the monsters in the bar.

"Woah, Grillby, you alright bud? Where you going?"

Halting for a moment, Grillby announces that the bar was closed for the day and told everyone to leave. He stayed at the door until every displeased monster had left the bar, and started running to the Hotlands.

He had to see Gaster.

Huffing and barely standing up, Grillby knocks at Gaster's door. When he'd asked at the labs where the doctor was, they had told him he was at the medical wing and which door he'd need to go to. Dread had taken hold of him and he had run here without letting the staff member finish their sentence.

It felt like he had waited an eternity before the door opened.

"Wha-? Grillby, what are you doing here?"

Gaster stood there confused as Grillby hugged him. A weight was lifted off of his soul as he held him close. He was alive, it had been nothing but a rumor after all.

A few staff members had gathered nearby, whispers filling the air.

Gaster cleared his throat and gently pushed Grillby until he let go of him.

"As I already asked, what are you doing here?" Gaster was visibly struggling to understand why the bartender had come here.

Suddenly realizing how odd it indeed was for him to have suddenly come here when they'd last seen months ago, Grillby felt his face grow brighter.

"Someone at the bar said that you had fallen down and-"

Gaster's eyes grew wide. "Sorry to interrupt, but I think we should talk about this inside." He gestured Grillby to come in, and closed the door behind them.

As Gaster locked the door, Grillby saw how the doctor was hunched slightly, like he didn't have the strength to stand up straight.

Worry started to grow again in his soul.

He walked next to Gaster, and noticed that the doctor's breathing was shaky and shallow.

"Gaster, you know that I'm not the type to pry, but something is clearly wrong, and I'm really worried now. What happened? Did, did he-?"

Gaster cut him off by lifting his hand. He was visibly struggling to stand up and he was shaking fervently. Before Gaster could say anything, Grillby picked him up and carried him to the couch on the side of the room. He was much lighter than Grillby had even realized.

"You didn't have to do that, but thank you." Gaster said, steadying his breath.

Both stay quiet for a moment, before Gaster starts to talk.

"I- the rumor, it- it's partially true. I am very close to falling."

Grillby stays quiet, listening closely as his soul churned, and the doctor continues to describe the situation with his usual calm demeanor.

"One of my colleagues found me collapsed at the lab few months ago, and I didn't wake up until few days ago. My upper HP has diminished drastically, and it has shown no signs of stopping. The medicine we have has managed to slow it down a little, but I doubt I have much longer left."

Grillby can't believe what he's hearing, there is no way Gaster could just- there had to be a way to save him, and that's what Grillby said to Gaster. But the doctor just shook his head.

"There isn't a cure for this, and even if there was... I don't think I'd even want it." The last part was but a whisper, but to Grillby it was as loud as a cave crashing down.

"That's not funny doctor, why wouldn't you want to live!?" Grillby asks, clearly agitated by Gaster's disregard for his own life. "There is no way that the Gaster I know would give up without a fight!"

The doctor looks at the ceiling with hollow eyes.

"You know, I saw him when I was asleep. The birds were singing,  the flowers were blooming... on those days, we would lay on the grass for hours, watching the clouds drift by in the gentle breeze..."

There is strong longing in the doctor's voice.

"Oh I miss him so, so much. I can't wait to see him again."

When he says that, Grillby sees that he is smiling. A cold shiver runs through his very being.

There is no light in the doctor's eyes.

Chapter Text

Asgore's stride was fast as his legs carried him towards the medical wing. He had heard a few moments ago that Gaster is awake, but he was furious he'd not been told this as soon as it happened two days  ago.

When Gaster had collapsed during one of his usual late days working on optimizing the, Asgore had been the one most worried, even though he hadn't dared to show it.

Medical staff hugged the walls, trying not to get trampled by the king. Anyone who dared to look him in the eye was met with a burning and furious gaze.

Their latest "meeting" replayed through his mind, and he was cursing for not having been more gentle at the time.

One member of the staff was blocking the way to the doctor's room. The monster stared at the king, shaking like a leaf on a stormy day. 

"Move." Asgore said with a low voice full of authority, but the monster stood still and shook it's head. 

"I'm sorry your majesty, b-but the doctor is not feeling well and has asked t-to turn away any and a-all visitors."

At that moment, Asgore could hear faint sounds of talking coming from the room, and he pushed the monster aside, leaning towards the door to listen more closely.

"Y-your m-majesty -!" The monster went quiet when the king silenced them with his hand, which practically covered the monsters whole face. When Asgore moved his hand away, the staff member shakily backed away, looking like they were about to cry, and left as the king returned his attention to the voices behind the door.

"But Gaster, wouldn't he want you to live and be happy? I'm sure he'd-"

"Grillby, my dear friend, I appreciate everything you've done for me, but I just cannot take it any longer."

Asgore wasn't sure whom the first voice belonged to, but it sounded panicked, and it was no wonder after hearing Gaster's feeble voice.

"And even if I could, I don't want to be used like a toy anymore."

When Gaster had been bedridden, Asgore had visited him daily, waiting patiently for him to wake up. But with each visit, Gaster's condition got worse and worse.

"Then come with me to Snowdin! You don't have to stay here! Please Gaster, I am begging you, don't give up on hope, I love you!"

One day the king had been too busy to visit the medical wing. That day, Gaster's condition had finally gotten better. The next time Asgore tried to visit, he was turned away in fear that Gaster would get worse yet again.

There's a long silence.

"You know I can't. Not in this condition. Not when I'm this broken, soul and body."

"But-"

"Please, no more. I need to rest..."

Asgore hears footsteps slowly coming towards the door and shuffles away from the door. When the door opens, he sees a red fire elemental, who turns towards the room one more time.

"I'll come visit again. I won't leave you, not like this. You can count on that."

As the elemental closes the door, he notices Asgore standing in the hallway a few feet away.

If a look could kill, Asgore would have dusted away where he stands. As the elemental starts walking away, the king feels... guilty, but isn't sure why. He walks closer to Gaster's door, and is about to knock as he hears soft sobs and stops... he'll visit tomorrow.

Chapter Text

The day Asgore visited after Gaster had been bedridden for months was the last straw.
After all he'd done to him, he still claimed to love, to care at all.
It was all proven false with the punishing pace of the following night.

The next morning, Gaster had ran. His body and soul wanted to break, they were at their limit.
But they didn't.
He found his shelter in the hidden laboratory, one he'd been working on in secret, away from prying eyes.

Away from him.

It was not perfect in the slightest, but it was hidden and only Gaster knew of the place.

The days went by as Gaster slept in a ragged hospital bed in one of the rooms and every now and then he would wake up shivering as he felt how his max HP fell lower and lower.

One of those days he managed to gather enough strength to tinker with an old TV and managed to get a fuzzy signal from Mettatons show.

"The royal scientist has been missing for over four months now, and our dear king Asgore has set a reward for finding him!"

Gaster felt unease grip his soul. He didn't want to be found if it meant that he would be there.

"According to a few witnesses, our Royal Scientist was last seen with a fire elemental Grillby from Snowdin. He's being held at the Capitol for further questioning and will remain there until the dear Doctor has been found."

As a commercial break began, Gaster felt weak in his soul.
Grillby would most likely not be freed until Asgore finds him.
But there was no way he was going back.
Gaster takes out a relatively small urn from his inventory and gently pets it.

"Hello love, it's me again. It's been a while since we've talked and... I... I can't keep going any longer."
Tears fall along Gasters cheeks as he struggles to speak, the words getting stuck at the back of his throat.
"I kn-know I should go back and help Grillby after all hh-he's done for m-me, but I just can't- "
Gaster holds the urn close hugging it for comfort as he wails in alone in the empty room.

Gaster layed on the ragged hospital bed of the lab room, still holding the urn. There were dark rings under his eyes and he seemed even more drained than before.

"Sans, I've come up with a solution for all of this," he says without any color in his voice while stirring a cup of coffee, a strong brew that was Sans' favorite. "You know as well as I that he won't stop, he won't change, he will not leave me alone."

Gaster adds two cubes of sugar, just like Sans used to.
"And Grillby... he deserves better. But he's so stubborn. And I doubt he will let him go until I've been found."

"That's why I've set up a timer. After it goes off, the doors of my secret lab will open and a message of my whereabouts will be broadcast through the whole Underground."
There was a pause as he took a deep breath before opening the urn.

"Once they find what's left of me, he'll have no choice but to let Grillby go."
He carefully pours the dust into the coffee cup and stirs it gently.

"And then Grillby will be free to finally find the happiness he deserves."
He takes a bottle from a nearby cabinet and adds some of the sickly green substance into the drink.

"I know, I know, I'll only add enough to make sure that when they arrive it will certainly be too late."
Gaster walks to the bed with the foul brew in hand and settles down.

"You know, I'm actually feeling happy right now. All of this will finally be over, and with you in this drink, we'll be together forever even in death," he chuckles as he brings the drink to his mouth. "I know, that was a bit cheesy."

He takes a deep breath, "I'll see you soon love," and downs the drink in one go.

Chapter Text

Grillby wishes this would just end as Asgore hits him once again with his fist covered by water. The king then grabs him by the throat. The remnant water on his hand stings painfully and Grillby struggles to inhale.

"START TALKING, WHERE IS GASTER, WHERE IS HE HIDING! I KNOW YOU KNOW WHERE HE IS YOU PATHETIC ASH!"
After Gaster disappeared, Grillby was taken in for questioning. The king was sure that the fire elemental knows where the Royal Scientist is - after all, Asgore did see them talking the day he ran away.

"I've already told you, I don't know! And even if I did, do you really think I would be telling it to you after all you did to him!?"
He barely manages to finish talking as another jab hits him at the side of his jaw, knocking him and the chair he's tied to at the floor.

Asgore walks and stands over Grillby, his face covered by shadows and eyes burning like embers.
"What I do with him is none of your or anyone else's business."

Grillby smirks. "See, this bad temper of yours is just one of the reasons he'll never accept you, 'my king.'"

He thought that would make Asgore angrier, but instead he just stood there for a while without saying a word before turning around and walking to a table with various tools.
Grillby feels uneasiness crawl along his back, scratching at his soul as Asgore runs his fingers by the edge of the table before picking a pair of pincers and looking back at Grillby.

"You are right, I do have a bad temper," he says, and puts the pincers back, looking at the selection carefully, lifting a manual drill and weighing it in his hands.

"But this is only because I worry of him," he says thoughtful, and suddenly slams the drill at the table as he raises his voice. "He could be in danger out there, and there's nothing I can do to help when I don't know where he is!"

Asgore turns and stares coldly at Grillby. "And you... you know where he is don't you?

Grillby tries to protest, "I already said-"

He's cut of as Asgore cuts him off by raising his voice again, "BUT THAT, is not all." There is a short pause, like he's tempting the elemental to try and speak again, but Grillby stays quiet and Asgore continues, "It's the same situation as it was with that inferior waste of monster kind during the war."
Each word was filled with malice and spite.

"That's why you need to perish..." As Asgore says this, he reaches down at the side of the table and picks up a water bucket he had used earlier, "Otherwise he'll waste his potential yet again."

Grillby's soul beats faster as Asgore walks closer, his earlier unease turning into panic. It's a different thing to get water on for a few seconds, but-

The air escapes him when Asgore stomps his foot on his abdomen.

"Whait- HGH- don'th h- you need me to h- know where G-haster is?"

The king pauses, but only for a moment. "I might as well get this over with now since you won't talk, won't you?"
He lifts the bucket just above Grillby's head as they hear a loud thumping at the door. The bucket sways a bit and spills quite a bit of water.
It hits Grillby right at the face, making him scream in agony. When a fire elemental's outer fires go out, it feels like their skin is peeled off.
The door opens and a few guards come in with someone from the labs.

"My king, oh I am deeply sorry to interrupt but we caught an unknown signal from somewhere in Hotland and think it might have something to do with the Royal Scientist-"

Asgore throws the bucket at the ground and strides to the researcher. "This better be true, or I won't overlook you barging in without permission."

The research just nods fervently as the king walks to the door.
One of the guards asks what they should do about the elemental who was now shaking, the fires at his face still gone.

"Do what you want, just make sure he lives if this is a false alarm."