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He was always meek and mild. But I saw the dark streak in him that no one else did. It intrigued me and scared me all at once. He and I were the only two at the circus of the same age. His mother was the snake charmer and my father was part of the Flying Graysons. We’d sometimes sit together and joke quietly or we’d just sit in silence while we both read. He was always quiet. Sometimes, we’d be talking and I’d catch a glimpse of his truer nature. He would let a too wide smile cross his face or let out a laugh that was a little too loud but in an instant it was gone.
We were sitting together on the little couch in my trailer since apparently his mother had kicked him out of his so she could play with her newest catch. We were both reading but he hadn’t turned the page for about ten minutes and he kept looking over to me with an odd smile. I couldn’t tell if it was good or bad. I felt like he was definitely coming to trust me more now. He seemed more confident; surer of himself. I felt like he was planning something.
Abruptly, he slammed his book down and I jumped slightly before laughing.
“You scared me, Jerome!” I said with a giggle.
“I’m bored.” He announced.
He moved so that his knee was touching mine and I couldn’t help but feel a little warm.
“Well, what do you want to do then?” I asked him softly.
He looked at me quickly before back at his lap. His brow was furrowed in thought and his nose slightly scrunched in a way that made heart do somersaults. He lifted his head up to look me in the eyes and then he did something odd. He kissed me.
It was quick and soft and I almost couldn’t register that it had happened as he darted away. It was a kiss that was laced with curiosity. Jerome grinned at me once more as if to ask if I minded. I responded with a kiss that was laced with something different. It lasted longer than the first and had a strong heat to it. Jerome’s hands cupped my face and my lips moved fervently against his in what was uncertain but urgent nonetheless. His tongue darted out, aggressive and invasive as he pushed into my mouth. His scent invaded me and his taste sustained me and I felt faint from the lack of oxygen yet refused to pull away. He pulled away from me to gasp in sweet air before diving back towards me. His hand moved slowly from his lap to my hip and he gripped me so tight that it hurt. It was as if some other side of him had taken over; far more primal and dominating than the docile boy I was familiar with. Intrigue mingled with the sense of fear and confusion that this new side brought.
Our sudden kiss was broken by the sound of padding footsteps. I jerked away from him, afraid of what my father would say if he saw the two of us. Jerome growled before sitting back to grab his book once more and his soft persona returned to him once more. My father opened the door to the trailer to see Jerome and I were both sitting silently on opposite ends of the couch. He grunted in my direction before moving towards his bedroom and shutting the door. I smiled softly at Jerome and he grinned before standing up.
“I better go see if my mom’s done fucking her new friend,” he whispered, “Besides I have business to attend to.” he finished before practically skipping out of my trailer.
I couldn’t keep the grin off my face that evening. I never knew that a kiss could be so electric. The fire he’d ignited in the pit of my stomach refused to go away. I’d never seen Jerome act that openly with me before. Pride swelled in my heart at the thought of him trusting me.
The next day was a blur. The evening, another brawl broke out between the Graysons and the Lloyds that led to the discovery the Jerome’s mother had been murdered. He was in fits of tears at the news. He refused to talk to me after. I only saw him when he was being taken in by the GCPD for questioning. His eyes were red rimmed and he flashed me a watery smile before he was gone. I was taken in for questioning later anyways to give a statement about the fight since I had been backstage during it. It baffled me that the rest of my family got so heated about the feud. I’d much rather ignore it. I’d much rather be sitting around and listening to Jerome’s jokes.
After I came back from the station, I found Jerome sitting alone in his trailer. His eyes were still red rimmed and I could fell the waves of pity wash over me as I looked at his lost expression. Truth be told, Lila Valeska hadn’t been a good woman. In fact, I’d almost found her unbelievably irritating and I knew that she was a terrible mother. But it was clear to me how much she must’ve meant to Jerome and my heart broke at the thought of him hurting.
As I sat down next to him on his bed, I lent my head on his shoulder and traced circles on his knee with my thumb, the way my mom used to when I was little. He stayed silent and I couldn’t see his expression but he seemed to relax into my touch.
“Are you ok, Jerome?” I asked quietly.
He stayed silent as if he hadn’t heard my question. Abruptly, he turned his body to face me and my head was shrugged off of his shoulder. I looked up to see a maniac grin caressing his cheeks.
“Never better, baby,” he exclaimed.
My eyes widened in shock as he dove forward to press his lips against mine in a hard kiss. His hands once more dug fiercely into my waist and I could feel his smile against my lips. I jerked my head away at once.
“Jerome?”
He frowned as he caught sight of my shocked expression.
“What’s wrong? I thought you liked it last time?” he said impatiently. “Can’t you satiate a grieving boy’s needs, y/n?” he asked with a smirk.
The Ringmaster said it was Jerome. He said that he was criminally insane and that they were sending him to Arkham Asylum. They said that Jerome had murdered his mother the night he left my trailer. My mind was foggy. There must’ve been a mistake. Except deep down I knew there wasn’t. It made sense. He hadn’t even seemed upset the other night. He seemed gleeful actually. And I’d thought it was some weird coping mechanism and I’d let him kiss me. More than kiss me. I’d given my virginity to a murderer. Except of course it didn’t make sense because he was my quiet Jerome who made me laugh sometimes but would never kill someone. Except he did. And I didn’t know how exactly I was supposed to feel about him.