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She was really something else, sitting here beside him, so close yet so far away. Knees pushed against her chest, arms wrapped around her legs, as if she wanted to protect herself from something, from him. Yet, despite those makeshift walls, she was as unguarded as she had ever been.
This he knows.
Her gaze is fixated on the ocean in front of them, seemingly taken with the push and pull of the tide. He wonders what could possibly going on inside that little pretty mind of hers, what thoughts made her stoic turn solemn. Those golden eyes of hers, so brilliant and bright, like diamonds mined from the depths of the starry sky, seemed sunken into the very sea she was staring at.
Her mind was treading dark waters, he thinks, but that was a place solely meant for him. It’s funny, because Childe has been drowning for a very long time, a lone narwhal exploring a depth opposite of the sky she belonged in. He does not remember the last time he had looked at his reflection and saw light inside them. And Lumine, which quite literally means light, was made of it.
Lumine could take on many forms of light, each with its own certain intensity. There was the shimmer of sass whenever her and Paimon would bicker, a subtle glow that still made people look, and then there was this radiance that comes when she has a sword in hand, the kind that stuck behind closed eyes like a sun speck after looking directly at it. But right now, she was nothing more than a twinkle, subdued and soft, like the stars just outside of Liyue. And it wasn’t that she was being outshone, but rather, she was resting, much like all else do at night.
He honestly doesn’t know which one he loves more.
Sure, he was originally taken with her in battle. After all, he believes that is his sole reason for existence, that his measure could only be worth something if melee was in the equation. Childe detests anyone and anything that is weaker than him because he learned how the world works the hard way. Or least, stumbled upon its darkest secret.
But Lumine…she was much more than strength. She was not of this world, and that was much bigger than anything he could ever achieve, could ever be.
Being around her made him want to live outside of crusades, for once. The feeling is an unfamiliar one, but it has not gone away since the day she came into his life, striking suddenly across his path like a fissure of lightening against a thundering sky. And although it was a big burst, it never touched his sea, not even his long narwhal tooth.
He was lonely, but so was she. Lumine was tiny, her reputation only making her stature a mere afterthought, and it is because of that that people often forget she is just a little meteor that fell into a foreign world. An alien, if you will.
Lumine was light, but she could never be a firefly, otherwise Childe would’ve put her in a jar by now. Though, she was far better than an animal, and he was no better than one.
She was of the sky and he was of the sea. So how they were here now, sitting along the beach like two normal people, was beyond him.
Was he this in love that it hurts? Childe has only ever known pain. And if he can’t make out this other emotion he has been feeling, he’ll continue to hurt himself in some way until someone guides him to the surface of his dark, dark ocean.
“Childe?”
Finally, something more than the waves rushing in his thoughts.
“I think I’m going to say the craziest thing in my existence.”
Oh? “And just what would that be, my lady?” he doesn’t look at her when he asks this, doesn’t know if he’ll lose himself to those golden hues. Many find themselves lost at sea, but what do you call it when you are out amongst the stars? Maybe the sky was no different than the sea. They were both outlanders in their own rights.
For the next few moments, she’s quiet. Beside him, she clenches then unclenches a fist, opens then closes her eyes, trying her best not to burst between the seams. She could explode into a million little pieces, much like a firework display at Lantern Rite, and maybe that’s just how these next few words will sound.
“I’m in love with you.”
His breath hitches in this throat.
She gulps. “I…I’ve been in love with you, for a while now.” Then she chuckles, exasperatedly. “Gods, you have no idea what you’ve been doing to me, villain.”
Finally, he gathers the courage to look at her. The bone at the bottom of her palm is pressed against her forehead, blonde bangs tangled in her fingers, gold eyes lidded but unblinking. Her other hand rests atop her knee, flat but with the tips of her fingers curled into her skin, as if she is trying to stabilize a ship in the middle of a storm out at sea. She is an image of disbelief.
“You really are a villain,” she continues, almost teasingly, “for making me feel this way.” There is a small smile on her lips now and his heart clenches at the sight.
“Pretty girl,” his voice is barely above a whisper as he leans in. “I’d say you’re just as bad as me,” he nuzzles her temple lovingly, “because you make me feel the same.”
Then before he knows it, he blinks and then she is looking at him, golden gaze as pure as diamond. And then he kisses her.
It is a delicate thing at first, the kiss. They get the angle all wrong, noses knocking awkwardly against each other while their hands and lips try to find their rightful places. Their eyes are closed, so they hesitantly reach out and cling to one another as if they’re searching through the dark.
At last, he sees the light, this time in the form of a lantern, floating gently down till it reaches the surface of the ocean that is him. It lingers long enough for the narwhal to reach the surface, to touch the light like his lips touching hers. It stays above water like she remains in his arms, even long after the kiss dissipates much in the same way a sparkler fizzes out.
Childe thinks of how long he’s waited, all the uncertainty and all the loneliness and all the heartache. And all of it has been worth it, for this, for her. It burns to nothing beneath her lips, reduced to ashes by the stroke of her fingertips against his cheekbone.
She is fire, too.
He prays that his waves won’t ever douse out her light.