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Achilles was humming with boisterous energy as he walked with his arm linked with Patroclus'. They were giggling and tittering like maidens, recalling their earlier exploits.
They had just been in the arena to assist Zagreus in his fight to the surface--now sanctioned by his father, Hades--and were high on the adrenaline of fighting beside each other again.
'Look now, monster! The hero Achilles comes to my aid!' Theseus cried, 'This daemon will fall under our combined, righteous might! To arms, brothers!'
'Hail, King of Athens,' Patroclus said, as he drove his spear through Theseus' exposed chest. Theseus made a high-pitched, annoyed sound; he had not expected such a betrayal. Patroclus savored the fury and confusion on Theseus' face.
'My fellow warriors--why?'
Achilles had his lyre and a vial of oil with him--he and Patroclus intended to celebrate their victory with some time to themselves; a romantic outing to the gardens of Elysium.
They had done this before and it was becoming their new favorite: a stroll through the lush meadows, ending in a place that Achilles was starting to think of as theirs--a beautiful fig tree.
They were close enough, and Achilles was done waiting. Achilles pulled Patroclus into a kiss and felt Patroclus smile against his lips.
"Here, out in the open?" Patroclus said, smiling wider. "Achilles, you are incorrigible."
"Indeed!" A booming voice shouted from above.
Achilles closed his eyes and Patroclus sighed. Theseus.
"You flaunt yourselves in front of Asterius and me to torment us further! I will not suffer such an insult, and neither will my bovine companion! Have at you!"
Achilles looked for the source of the noise--as that's what it was--and found Theseus pointing at him from high up in a fig tree. Their fig tree. Achilles felt a flare of anger and possessiveness.
Get down from there.
He didn't have his spear, but he would not need it.
Patroclus pulled at his arm, as if he could tell what Achilles wanted to do.
"We do not need to waste time sending them back to the Styx," Patroclus murmured in his ear. "If they are here, then let us go to the arena and besmirch what is theirs."
Throwing Theseus out of a tree was tempting, but Patroclus' idea was more so. Achilles let himself be led.
"Oh-ho! Not so mighty, after all! Watch them flee in terror, Asterius!"
Achilles gave a pleading look to Patroclus.
No, Patroclus mouthed, pulling Achilles' arm again and grinning.
---
They arrived at the stadium--or, just outside of it--Patroclus had no interest in having a full audience watch what he and Achilles meant to do.
Patroclus pulled Achilles close and kissed his neck, deliberately brushing his beard against the sensitive skin. Achilles shivered and laughed indulgently, wrapping his arms around Patroclus' shoulders.
"That's nice..." Achilles said, leaning his head back.
"Hhhhhaaaaagggghhhhh," a familiar death rattle nearby.
"Boss is right, shop's closed," another familiar voice translated, his annoyance plain.
Charon and Hermes were behind the towering stacks of wares and obols--Hermes had his eyes narrowed at Patroclus. Hermes was flushed and his eyes were dark--oh, they were--oh.
"Achilles, we should go," Patroclus said, taking Achilles by the arm and leading him back the way they'd come.
"--was that Charon and Hermes?"
---
"But what do you suppose is under the robes?" Achilles asked, as they made their way to the Elysian baths.
"I do not know, and I cannot believe you are making me imagine it."
"Hermes did not seem displeased."
"Achilles."
The baths had a few lingering shades, but Achilles was beyond caring. He would not be run off from this place. Achilles undid his armor and took off his chiton, piling them carelessly next to the pool.
"Achilles," Patroclus said with a playful tsk. "You remain incorrigible."
Patroclus had removed his own chiton and folded it, tucking it with Achilles' hastily discarded one. Achilles was already in the water.
"Come kiss me already," Achilles said, as a headband appeared--tossed from behind him--in the pile of clothes next to Patroclus. Achilles had leaned back into the water, his hair fanned around him like rays of the sun.
Patroclus removed his own headband, his laurels. Achilles caught his eye, pursed his lips.
Patroclus laughed as he joined him, bringing their lips together at last.