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Aether felt an all-too-familiar sense of loneliness creeping up his spine.
Being surrounded by so many people, with Paimon by his side… he should have been feeling joyous. He should have been able to laugh and feel right at home within all of these people, but something didn’t feel right. But this time, it wasn’t the loss of his sister that caused him to feel so isolated. No, rather, it was the loss of someone that had been right beside him just a few moments ago.
How many times was he supposed to do this? To leave someone who seemed like they were silently wishing for company? Who was always alone, with no one to care for them? It brought Aether back to the months without Paimon, when he was a lost traveler with no clue where to go. He had been just the same back then, with no one to care for him. No one to ask if he was okay, or if he simply needed someone to talk to. No one to insist on staying, even after the only person who would have stayed had been so cruelly taken away from him.
Aether never wanted anyone to experience that sort of loneliness in any lifetime. And that empathy found itself applied to none other than Xiao, who had always been insistent on being alone, probably due to the many years that he had grown accustomed to the feeling. Aether found himself remembering how Ganyu told him that even though she and Xiao shared many similarities, she preferred to stay away from him due to the unfortunate fates of those who were paired with Xiao in any capacity.
What kind of life was that? To be not only alone, but deliberately shunned? For something that Xiao himself could not even control? Aether found himself being repulsed by such a fact. Wasn’t something like that supposed to make a person want to be around him more? Even if not out of friendship, but at the very least, sympathy?
“Aether! Paimon thinks we should get something to eat before the Mingxiao Lantern is released! Think about it—eating Grilled Tiger Fish and enjoying the view sounds wonderful!”
Aether was suddenly brought back to reality at the sound of Paimon’s high-pitched voice, and he smiled gently at his flying companion. “Sure. Just don’t spend all of our Mora on Grilled Tiger Fish,” he said with a nervous laugh, a hand on the pouch of Mora in his pocket that was suddenly feeling much too heavy (and soon, much too light).
He followed as Paimon rambled about wondering if her wish for an endless stomach would come true, with Aether silently commenting how she already had one and earning a “Hey!” from his companion. He felt lighter speaking to Paimon and joking around with her, but it only brought him back to how Xiao likely had no one to do the same with him.
Would he be watching the Mingxiao Lantern being released with no one by his side yet again? Would he even watch the lantern being released in the first place? Aether had faith that he would, but the thought of Xiao being lonely yet again was—
“—terrible!” Paimon was saddened, it seemed, about how the Grilled Tiger Fish had run out already. The chef had reassured her that he was preparing more, resulting in a very quick switch in her attitude as she salivated over the rest of the delicacies in the food stall.
Soon enough, the two had made their way to the rooftop next to the leftmost teleport waypoint, with Aether sitting cross-legged and Paimon scarfing down her eighth—no, tenth—Grilled Tiger Fish. They had a wonderful view of the Mingxiao Lantern from here, and Aether wondered if Xiao was seeing the same. Was he waiting for the lantern to be released, just as they were? Was he standing in the mountains, looking up at the sky with nostalgic, yet patient eyes? Was he feeling lonely as he did?
Aether felt the guilt from leaving Xiao behind not once, but twice, catching up to him. First, when they had left Xiao to eat the Grilled Ticker Fish by himself while thinking about Pervases (truthfully, Aether had wanted to stay, but was unsure of whether it would be an invasion of privacy and left the matter alone). Second was just now, when Xiao had refused to come to Liyue even when he had escorted them all the way to the entrance. Aether thought that he was supposed to be satisfied that Xiao seemed to enjoy the mini Lantern Rite they had held for him, but he couldn’t help but feel like there was still something missing.
No, he knew what was missing, and it wasn’t a something. It was a someone, and that someone was Xiao.
He heard excited cheering coming from below, and he looked down to see the crowds merging together before the site of the Mingxiao Lantern. It seemed that its release was going to happen soon, and Aether felt a knot tie itself in his stomach in that familiar feeling of loneliness again.
“I detest rabble,” Xiao had said, but Aether knew that to some extent, that wasn’t true. He had the sneaking feeling that it wasn’t just that, but the guilt that Xiao felt being a demon-slaying adeptus even possibly enjoying the rite like the pure, jubilant souls of Liyue that plagued him. Aether wished that Xiao would understand that his deeds didn’t exempt himself from enjoying anything, or even having company.
“But stay vigilant. Keep your eyes open for any menace. If you find yourself in trouble… speak my name.”
“Sure you’d make it into the city in time to come to the rescue?” Aether had said playfully, knowing that Xiao would. But behind his humorous words were even the slightest hope that Xiao would actually come, even without the danger.
“Anywhere. Anytime. Whether yours or Liyue’s, I hear all cries for help, all prayers for peace, and all the wishes carried by the lanterns,” were his final words before Aether and Paimon departed for Liyue, with Aether’s heart begging for him to run back and drag Xiao along with him. But he didn’t, and now, he wished he had.
Was it immoral to feel this way? Was he supposed to feel guilty that he wanted someone who had said he preferred not to come to appear simply to fulfill Aether’s desire to see him? If only Aether could call his name without any danger involved. If only Aether could call him just to see him again, and for Xiao to feel happy that he did.
Aether wanted to try it.
So, with the bustling crowd’s excited cheers below, the hums of stories and legacies flowing through the streets, and the sound of Paimon eating away happily beside him, Aether called for him. He called for Xiao, not once, not twice, but multiple times, until the sounds of the Lantern Rite were drowned out by the desperate whispers of Xiao’s name underneath his breath.
“I thought I explicitly said that I detest rabble. That includes my name being mentioned multiple times, traveler.”
“Haven’t I told you to call me Aether?” He said with a slow laugh, turning his head back to look at none other than Xiao. He looked the same as he had just a few moments ago, with a stern expression and crossed arms, and a soft smile spread on Aether’s face. “Won’t you fulfill this simple wish of mine on such a wonderful day?” His voice dripped with honey, and he could tell it had an effect on Xiao with the way his posture stiffened ever-so-slightly.
“Did I not say that you should call my name only during times of danger?” He said stiffly, staying in place as he looked between Aether’s face and the vacant spot next to him. “I see no signs of trouble here, trave—Aether,” he added in between hesitant, clenched teeth, making Aether smile.
“Ah, that. You see, Paimon here is a true menace, spending all of my Mora on Grilled Tiger Fish. As such, I need to be rescued from her in order to save my wallet. Care to help a poor traveler out?” He sounded almost sincere with such a playful smile on his face, and he could tell that Xiao was not amused as Paimon screeched out a "Hey! Paimon is not a menace!"
(Aether noticed that she made no effort to deny that she had spent all of his Mora.)
Xiao’s face was morphing from confusion to quick realization, his golden eyes going wide before thinning into a slight glare. To think that he had been fooled so easily—no, lured—by Aether. Yet he could not ignore the fact that maybe, just maybe, he had allowed himself to be fooled, knowing fully well that there was no danger at all. “Ridiculous,” he muttered, more to himself before turning away from the two. “If that is all, then I will be on my way.”
“No, wait—!”
Time seemed to stop as Aether reached a hand out, grabbing Xiao’s hand and causing the adeptus to turn around with wide eyes. They both looked at each other in silence, with Aether breathing heavily and his eyes pleading for Xiao not to go. Aether wanted anything, anything but that. Maybe it was selfish, begging for him to stay when everyone else in Aether’s life had left or been left behind. “The Mingxiao Lantern is about to be released. Why don’t you stay until then? I won’t keep you any longer than that.”
Xiao’s gaze lingered on their intertwined hands and then on Aether, clearly still hesitant. But he seemed to understand the hidden meaning behind Aether’s words—the desperate plea for him to stay and quell their loneliness by being together. So, after what seemed like hours of consideration, his grasp on Aether’s hand tightened, and he gave in.
Warmth filled Aether’s heart as Xiao took a seat next to him, his gaze fixed on the Skybracer memorial and intent on not meeting Aether’s. But the traveler was satisfied with this—their intertwined hands snug as the Mingxiao Lantern was finally released. Aether’s head somehow made its way to Xiao’s shoulder while Skybracer pranced in the air, Xiao Lanterns illuminating the sky like fireflies in a night of darkness. Aether didn't want it to end.
"Won't you stay afterwards?" He found himself asking quietly, not intending for his words to be heard. Yet he realized that they had when he felt a squeeze on his hand with gentleness a polar opposite to the brutal strength of the vigilant yaksha. There was no need for an explicit answer, Aether realized, because the way that Xiao was holding onto him like a lifeline was answer enough.
Yes, his grip left unsaid, as long as you stay with me too.