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It was late in the night—or early in the day, depending on whether you woke up during the late afternoon or at dawn—and the sky was brightening before Jude’s eyes. As she gazed out at the royal gardens her stomach was flipping despite the calm atmosphere. The flowing gardens were always full of life and tranquility no matter the season or the time of day, two things that were ironic to Jude when she thought about the death and chaos she caused in the very same place. But that wasn’t what she was pondering. In the cool air, she stressed over her future, fiddling with the ruby ring on her finger while a million thoughts flew through her mind. What if he doesn’t like it? What if he thinks it’s just a dumb human tradition? What if I’m going to make a fool of myself?
As the sun rose past the horizon, Jude knew she had to be decisive, it was now or never—even though it really wasn’t, because she could just give up and wait until tomorrow (except that was what she had been doing for the past week and a half)—and spun around on her heel, marching confidently back into the palace. She was determined, nothing would stop her now, not her own fears and definitely not anyone else.
She made her way towards her chambers, the ones she now shared with Cardan, hoping that he was still there, ideally still sitting on their bed reading, just as she had left him with some excuse of needing fresh air. She was already making scripts in her head—she would walk in, take the book from his hands, and declare she had something to talk about, it would be that easy. But if it were going to be that easy, why was doubt creeping in again, screaming at her that she was making herself too vulnerable.
She shook her head as she passed the guards at her chamber doors, lifting a hand to make a motion vaguely similar to a wave, before pushing her shoulders back, lifting her head high, and pushing through the doorway with as much confidence as she could muster. You can do this. It was a mantra repeating in her mind as she crossed the antechamber and opened the bedroom doors, closing her eyes momentarily and taking a deep breath before steeling herself for what she was going to do.
“Cardan! I have—” something for you. The words died on her tongue as she saw Cardan sitting on her side of the bed, a black box left haphazardly on the sheets next to him, a ring held between to fingers.
They were both slow to react, Jude out of shock and fear, Cardan because he was seemingly to focused on the band he held to realize his wife had even entered the room. After what felt like years to Jude, he turned to her, a look in his eyes that was familiar, but she couldn’t tell from what.
“Would you like to explain what this is?” His voice was clear and left no room for games, but Jude could hear slivers of confusion intertwined with the words.
She let herself freak out for a few seconds, before getting a shaky grasp on her emotions, trying to drive the fear and stress away. It’s going to be okay. It’s just a ring, it’s nothing. Except it was something, it was something important to Jude, but it had been a long time since she had voluntarily said something was important to her. She much preferred to leave it unsaid, to show that something—or, most recently, someone—was important through meaningful actions and other words. With Cardan it was whispered ‘I love you’s as she drifted off to sleep and cups of his favorite tea when he woke up, soft glances from across the room during meetings and light kisses when they were finally alone for the night. She let herself take one more deep breath, remembering that he was her husband and this wasn’t really that big of a deal.
“It’s a ring,” His eyes bore into hers, screaming I know that, stop being difficult! She continued, “It’s a ring, uh, a ring for you.”
He nodded once, something about his demeanor changing slightly. “It’s a ring. For me.”
Jude nodded, trying to force the words that had been playing in her head for the past month out of her mouth, but Cardan spoke before she could, “Then why was it hidden? And why now? There’s nothing to celebrate.”
Jude glanced at the ground quickly before looking back into Cardan’s eyes, “I just—It’s for you because you’re my husband and I know that sharing rings and whatever isn’t like a thing for faeries but it is for me and you gave me a ring when we got married which meant that you know that, even if it was technically mine to begin with, before you were an absolute asshole and stole it. So, I got you a ring, a dumb human ring, because you’re my husband and married people give each other rings, even if the idea of giving you a ring is dumb and intimidating.”
It all came out at once, in a much less eloquent fashion than she had intended, but Jude supposed she shouldn’t be picky about how it came out when at least it was finally out.
Cardan seemed to be in shock at Jude’s outburst, looking at the ring then her then the ring again.
“You got me a wedding ring?”
Jude nodded sharply. Cardan grinned.
“And then you hid it because you got scared?”
“I was not scared!” Jude shouted, “I never said I got scared!”
Cardan grinned wider, if that was even possible, standing up and walking towards where Jude stood by the door.
“Sure, not scared, just—what was it?” He pretended to think as he approached her, “Oh yes, you said it was intimidating to give me a ring.”
Jude glared, “This was supposed to be romantic, you know? Not you making fun of me for a poor choice of words.”
Cardan smiled, leaning in to kiss her brow, and mumbling something along the lines of “Sure, if that’s what you say.”
Jude tried to stay annoyed with him, but he was frustratingly good at using soft touches to unravel her, his breath making her shiver as it brushed along her jaw and neck.
“It’s just—Cardan, stop, I’m trying to talk.” He grinned, stepping back from where he was leaving a particularly dark bruise on the underside of her chin. “It’s just that I grew up seeing rings on my parents’ fingers and now I have a ring on my finger and I like it, a lot more than I thought, and a lot more than I’ll ever admit again. And I just wanted that for you, I wanted to give you something that you could have forever, to remind you that I loved you, even if I wasn’t there to say it.”
Something softened in his eyes, a genuine smile flashing across his face as he reached down to grab Jude’s hand.
“Jude, I promise you, I could never forget that you love me. And I don’t know what you’re worried about, I love it, I love you.”
Cardan smiled before making a show of slipping the ring onto his finger. Jude smiled back, hesitantly, before reaching forward to cup Cardan’s cheek and pull him in for a sweet kiss.
“So, how long were you hiding it before I found it? Days? Weeks? Maybe a month? Am I really that scary?” Cardan’s voice filled the room before he began laughing at Jude’s exasperated groan.
“Maybe I’ll take it back, then, if you’re going to make me wish I never married you.” She countered as Cardan crowded her, pulling her towards their bed.
“Oh, we both know you’re never going to wish that.” Jude swallowed a sharp retort and just shook her head, smiling as Cardan kissed her.