Chapter Text
To say at first Steve panicked was an understatement.
There’s always some reason to panic in the Avengers Compound. Vision not knowing how to cook and trying without Wanda’s supervision (bad joke, he cringes), Tony setting something on fire in the lab which is no different than the Tower, or something else going amiss...Usually ending in fire. DUM-E has never had the time of its- his?- its life wheeling in with a fire extinguisher. The first time it automatically doused Tony with it, then the actual fire. But he’s getting better. And so are they at not settings things afire in the Compound.
No, no, this time the reason for panic was about himself. And no, it’s not about how to set up the TV again.
It started with him being more sluggish than usual. More irritable, more grumpy. Getting up early in the morning was a challenge when it had been nothing just days before. It was weird, waking up and feeling as if the bed were so warm and comfortable he didn’t want to leave for anything. Even trying to force himself out was a challenge and he felt major fatigue.
He’s sure the others have noticed it too, if the weird sympathetic confused looks were anything to go by. Sam one time commented on Steve being a bit slower than usual during the one time Steve tried to push for a jog but Steve had snapped at him to shut up rather harshly. It didn’t hold much threat while he was near gasping for air.
He later apologized with a gift basket.
The blond currently moped around in his room, buried under his comforter and wanting a hole to open up and swallow him whole.
They were a team full of assassins, vets, mutants, a billionaire, a scientist and an android so of course nothing would go unnoticed. He kind of wished it had, because then it wouldn’t make things so awkward all the time. Steve can’t help but think about when they started - “they” being the illness that have suddenly struck him.
One dinner night, Wanda had made spaghetti but the meatballs were just..too extra. Steve tried to keep the nausea down all right through the exchanged banter. But his senses were too heightened and it made everything ten times worse. Tony was joking about something Thor said earlier and maybe it was the movement, or his enhanced senses picking up the whaff of the food again, but Steve had basically rushed out of his chair and thrown up in the kitchen sink. That had silenced the room quickly.
He remembered how it made him feel, the burning of his throat and the uncontrollable squeezes of his abdomen to force it all up. Tears were already building as he practically coughed up his insides, the sounds of retching in his ears.
And it was quiet for a really long time. Obviously besides Steve’s puking. Even after he had coughed up the last several hours of food and weakly slumped over when nothing was left but weak abdominal contractions, there was no movement. It was mortifying.
“Well...let’s hope the serum isn’t wearing off.” Clint had mumbled under his breath but Steve heard it clearly and it made everything crumble around him. Maybe he had made it to be a joke, but Steve couldn’t tell. Only saw his line of sight blur with tears as he bolted right back to the stairs in order to retreat to his room.
So he began panicking.
The serum couldn’t be failing, could it? If Tony was every inch of his father’s smarts then it wouldn’t just...wear off. Howard wouldn’t do that. Erskine wouldn't do that. Not like that. He hadn’t even been compromised by any unknown alien beams or mad scientist gasses. Bucky of course wanted to drag his Star-Spangled rear end to Dr. Helen Cho to demand answers, since Bruce made it clear he is not a doctor, but Steve had for once put his foot down and said no means no. He needed to give it time. Bucky usually never let up - but maybe it was the following argument that ensued which did it. Words were exchanged, harsh ones - and it got heated to the point of no return.
He was royally screwing it up.
Not to mention only two days later, after struggling with his daily runs, staying awake and the new nausea that accompanied him with the days, Steve had unknowingly snapped at Fury. The Nick Fury, Director of the Avengers. Him! Steve!!
Long story short, he thought Tony was speaking and he had a killer headache, forgot where he was and wanted to tell the man to shut the hell up. So he did. Turns out Tony wasn’t speaking.
It was so silent that Steve couldn’t help the burn of his neck and ears when he muttered a sorry and just looked down at the table. The headache was not helping nor was the mortification. Everyone had not looked away from Steve the rest of the meeting while Fury hadn’t stopped glaring at him like his life depended on it. It would be better to just die at this point.
So going back to the Compound, Steve had holed himself up in his room and not even Bucky could come in. That was fine. He hadn’t really spoken to him since their argument anyways.
Currently, the blond moped under a large comforter and sketchbook in hand. He did that when stressed, which was now a lot. Unfortunately, if things continued and he was very much dying, then he would have to go to Dr. Cho, which scared him more than anything. Steve hated doctors, he hated being sick. Which was why the serum was such a blessing when it was.
A knock on the door is enough to break him out of his mopey-state, but he’s not fast enough to tell the other person on the side he wants to be left alone. They’ve already picked the lock and walked in.
“Rise and shine, sleeping beauty,” Natasha announces, closing the door back behind her and locking it. She turns on the light as well, walking around the room to tidy some things up. Steve hadn’t even noticed that his room had gotten a bit out of hand.
“Nat…”
“I’m tired of watching you embarrass yourself. C’mon. Up.” And her tone doesn’t leave any room for argument, especially when the redhead reaches over to yank the blanket off of Steve’s body. The chill set over his body as he glared at her, grabbing the blanket back somewhat. “Whatever you’re going through needs to be sorted out now.”
Steve reluctantly sits up, feeling a new wave of nausea hit him as the room spins a bit. The sketchbook and pencil get set to the side just as Natasha grabs his chin to properly look into his eyes, green sharp ones piercing his own blue. He doesn’t know what she’s looking for but she’s good at it everytime.
“How mad is he?” Steve reluctantly asks, as her slender hand comes up to feel his forehead.
Natasha hums, pausing for a second before brushing through his hair. “I think more shocked than anything his favorite boy scout talked back to him out of turn. Clint and Sam are still laughing at it.” That did not make him feel any better, but Nat is pulling back and reaching into her pocket. A million things are running through his mind about what it could be before a white stick is thrown onto Steve’s lap, and he looks down at it in confusion for a solid second. It’s only then when its familiarity strikes in his head does he feel utterly sick.
God, no.
“Nat, I’m not-”
“Take it, or I’ll draw bloodwork to take the test myself.” Natasha demands. Steve feels a lick of fear touch his heart, but his ultimate stubbornness overrides that.
“I’m not…” He waves his hand in an unsaid statement. “I can’t even do that.” Except Natasha doesn’t look convinced nor does she look like she’s playing any sort of game. Her doubt is reflected back onto Steve’s own, especially at what he’s been going through the past week and a half. And it’s not like Steve hasn’t been active. “I’m not.” He repeats, more to convince himself now that the seed was planted. And besides, the concept was ridiculous. Steve Rogers was and always has been a biological man. His face shows his disdain, but Nat isn’t letting up.
“Just take it. If it says no, then I’ll let you go.”
“No, you won’t.” Steve grumbles, and he sees the hint of a smile on her face. “If it says yes, that means I have cancer.”
“Serum wouldn’t allow that.” Nat says with a shrug as if she’s already thought of that. Steve has to count down from ten to not completely blow up.
He sighs. “I can’t take this.”
“Take it.”
“No.”
“Right now.”
“Nat-”
“Steve.”
“Can you just-”
“Take it.”
There really was no arguing with her, because it was Natasha.“Where did you even get this?!” Steve asks in exasperation, throwing up his hands before reaching for the test with anger. Still, he didn’t know why he had asked that. Nat could sneak in an elephant and no one would know about it until she actually allowed others to know. Her silence doesn’t help, but Steve sighs and slips out of the bed. “I can’t wait to see the look on your face when it says negative.”
Her smile irks him even further.
Steve makes his way into the bathroom, closing the door with a little more force than necessary. It was exhausting, and the whole idea was too ridiculous to entertain. Him? Pregnant? No way. Bruce would admit his love to Thor before such a thing would ever happen. And even then, they’ll all be dead before Bruce even admitted to liking someone. He couldn’t conceive in that way, it wasn’t something even before the serum he could do. He wonders if he could just fake it by sticking it in the bowl of water, but that’s probably not how it worked.
Even more so, he didn’t know much about pregnancy in the first place. There was a pregnant woman back in his old apartment complex during the 40s. Actually, she stayed pregnant, he noticed. Seven kids, four miscarriages, he heard from the gossiping neighbors. It seemed every time he saw her, she was heavy mid sectioned with a screaming child in her arms. Steve once talked to her, and she was nice, but very tired. That was about it. This whole thing was beginning to look a lot more screwed up. Not to mention Steve didn’t know how he would wrap his head around it. So plain and simple, he knew it would be negative.
“Hurry up, times ticking!” Nat calls out.
“Alright, I’ve got it!”
There was no rush. No one was coming - at least he hoped no one else was coming. All the Avengers were too perceptive and it would get out depending on who it was. No one was a gossip but he was Captain America, co leader of the Avengers. And his embarrassment plays out all over again, knowing the others were very worried for him behind his back.
But now he was feeling a bit stumped, looking down at the test. “Uh...Friday, so I just...urinate on it and it’ll give me results?”
‘Yes, Captain.’
But Steve knows that’ll take time, so he better get to it. At this point, he had nothing to lose. Biting his pride, Steve does uncap the test with his shaking hands. He does have to shut his eyes closed when he swallows the embarrassment of actually peeing on it when he does so. Thinking of quite literally everything else but.
It’s a painful minute, with him capping the test once done and finishing up with wiping, rearranging his clothes and flushing the toilet. The sudden onslaught of nausea feels familiar but at the same time uncomfortable and unwanted. It’s only intensified by the sudden weight on the test, and after washing his hands, Steve leaves the bathroom with the test behind on the counter. Natasha is sitting on his made bed, reading a book from off of his desk as she reclines easily. “Was it that bad?”
Steve huffs. “This isn’t going to work. I’m a man, I can’t just-” He cuts himself off, looking down at the ground and crossing his arms. Why was it so hard to explain? He didn’t necessarily feel embarrassed about it, but the whole situation felt weird. Natasha seems to get the idea as she sits up and throws her legs back over the side of the bed. “You don’t think it’s possible, don’t you?”
“No, if I’m being honest, it took me a good couple days to come up with a list of things that you could be going through and I had to do the process of elimination. This was at the bottom of the list.” Natasha shrugged and flipped through a couple more pages. “I don’t know your biology, but I see you cry over spilled milk one more time, then I’m gonna lose it.”
Steve feels himself tense, the defensive part of him coming up to want to lash out and say he did not cry, but has to bite his tongue. Technically he did, and it was very embarrassing. In his ultimate defense, it was the last of the milk and Steve had just spilled it as if every deity of clumsiness decided to gift him their powers. Exhaustion still racked his body like crazy, so he flops down onto the bed. Natasha makes a noise of protest. “Hey, be careful, I just made this.”
It’s only then does he notice that indeed it was made up. It’s heartfelt, and he sits up a bit to shoot her a smile. “Thanks, Nat. But you didn’t have to do that.”
“No, but I had to keep myself occupied while you were in there. I give all my friends depression passes so you’ve used this one up.”
It’s reasonable, he guesses. Steve sits up to dutifully crawl up right next to her, leaning into her warmth. Recently, this sudden ailment has zapped his body heat and he’s been colder than his normal furnace like temperature. Maybe the serum really was wearing off like Clint said. And that scared him. Which circled back to his panic from before.
It all seemed pretty silly to just sit twirling his thumbs in anticipation for a test that will come out negative, he knows. So he just cuddles with Nat as the time slowly ticks down until Friday announces the five minutes were up. He didn’t even ask for a timer, but good thing she kept it anyway.
He tenses, as Natasha looks down at him and brings a hand up to brush through his hair. “I’ll go with you. Or do you want me to read it first?”
She’s a good friend, but Steve is now too curious himself. If anything, he’d rather he be the first to read it. “No, I’ll go first. Just to prove you wrong.”
“Sure, Rogers.”
So he stands and heads back to the bathroom, feeling the anxiety and nausea build up in his throat with each step. He hadn’t felt this nervous in forever.
But there’s nothing to be scared of, because stepping into the lit bathroom, Steve clearly sees two lines on the little window from the entrance. At first, he believes his eyes are deceiving him before he remembers he didn’t exactly know what the results meant. “Uh...Friday?”
‘ That would mean positive, Captain. A congratulations would be in order.’
And so the panic resumes.
Every little ounce of strength is zapped from Steve as he stands there, feeling as if he were going to pass out at any second. This was bad, this was wrong. It couldn’t be accurate since he had the serum running in his veins and he wasn’t exactly a female. Not to mention he didn’t know the how, what or why. He just couldn’t believe it.
But it made sense, he guesses. The sudden onslaught of symptoms just came out of nowhere and he was by no means not active in the bedroom, but he hasn’t done that in over a couple weeks.
“Nat?” He calls out, dropping the test on the counter and falling to his knees. The sudden feeling of wanting to puke had gotten a hold of him, and good thing he was near a toilet too because his mouth was salivating with the threat of it.
The assassin makes her way into the bathroom. Steve hears her very soft footsteps, and can see her out of the corner of her eye standing right in the doorway. She can clearly see the test, and Steve feels even sicker.
“Please tell me I’m hallucinating it.”
Silence follows, before Natasha simply utters, “Huh.”
He was screwed. He was definitely screwed.
"Well," Natasha starts slowly, eyeing the white stick on the counter. "I mean, it's not the weirdest thing I've witnessed all my life."
Steve groans, pressing his forehead further onto his arm, hunched over the toilet. "Please don’t."
"We've fought aliens. This will be the least of our worries. So whose is it?"
Steve is silent, seeming to wilt under Natasha's penetrating gaze even if he's not directly looking at her.
"Steven Rogers, you son of a bitch."
That was the breaking point. He feels the tears well up in his eyes, and just thinking about it sends a whole wave of embarrassment down his back. It wasn’t his fault at all, but maybe it was his fault. “Nat,” He calls out, and thankfully, the redhead reaches down to rub circles into his back. It’s soothing, because she uses just the brunt of her nails to lightly scratch as well. “I don’t understand.”
She sighs, kissing the top of his head. “Well, let’s go down the list, shall we? Mood swings, nausea, fatigue…”
“That can be any sickness.”
“You’re gonna tell me that you didn’t get up to some adult activities at Tony’s little shebang...it’s him, isn’t it?” She asks in a monotone voice. But Steve shakes his head, before pausing and shrugging. He would never cheat on Bucky, even though they technically weren’t dating. “James? Thor? Don’t tell me it’s Clint or I’ll seriously kick his ass.”
“No! No, it’s just...I don’t know if it’s Bucky’s...or Tony’s.” Steve admits, and if he weren’t so sick, his cheeks would be pink instead of pale. Or maybe green. Natasha’s hand pauses, before slowly continuing.
“Huh.” She mutters again, as if she couldn’t believe it. “James I can see, but Tony? In what world are you guys fucking instead of strangling eachother?”
The brunt of her words does cause Steve to blush this time, the heat shooting up his face as he tries not to hurl into the bowl. “It’s not...like that…”
“Oh, my apologies. “ Fondue”-ing instead of strangling each other . ”
“ Nat. ”
“Sorry, sorry.”
Steve sighs, rubbing at his forehead and then nervously pulling at his fingers. “It could- It could be wrong.”
“Your denial is showing.” Natasha pokes his back, before humming in thought. “I’m sure it won’t do any harm to go double check. But you cannot deny that it’s not a possibility. Blood tests are more accurate if you want one of those.”
Steve rolls the idea over in his head nervously. If he were to take it to a doctor, which he doesn’t know any he trusted well enough to handle such information like this, it would still be something that he didn’t know how to handle. A baby??
He moves slightly, preparing to stand when he’s sure that the threat of throwing up has passed, and Natasha helps him up. Once Steve has adjusted himself, the redhead bends down to whisper to his midsection. “Be a girl.”
“Nat,” Steve lightly scolds, ignoring the heat coming back tenfold again. The spy only shrugs and straightens once more, patting his shoulder as Steve sighs and walks out of the bathroom.
The super soldier moves to sit on the bed, just as Nat follows after with the test in hand. Slipping it into Steve’s hold, she crosses her arms and tilts her head slightly, a more serious expression overcoming her features. “Listen, as much as I love you, I would still consider taking another test but with a serious mindset. The possibility of a baby is nothing to play around with and especially in our line of work. You know how dangerous that is…”
Yes, he did. But Steve didn’t even know such a thing was possible, so it wasn’t like there were measures to prevent it.
He sighs, once again playing with his own hands to give himself something to do. He had no idea how he was going to approach Bucky and Tony with this information. Especially Tony, since there was no spark between him and the engineer. At least not anymore. Bucky was recovering and whatever “thing” they had kind of came to a standstill. Tony still loved Pepper, and Steve still loved Bucky, so they agreed to go their own mutual ways.
Except he’s had no luck with Bucky either.
The other super soldier is still somewhat recovering. King T’challa was so kind to offer his services in removing the brainwashing and trigger words, and Bucky is doing much better. Steve doesn’t want to rush his best friend at all, and romance would only get in the way of that.
So the plan to stay out of each of their ways went to utter shit when Tony planned some trip to one of his private islands.
Everyone went except Natasha and Wanda, who claimed they were just fine having the time of their lives with no boys in the Compound. Tony did offer for them to go on vacation, which they did take.
So a week of relaxation and...fun. Ish. Thor brought some Asgardian level alcohol for Steve and Bucky to enjoy as well, and what other way to let loose than a threesome?
In Steve’s ultimate defense, he had never really bottomed before especially not for Tony. But the billionaire himself suggested (the threesome was his idea in the first place) and Steve really, really liked it. As much as he could remember at least. But fuck, if he knew it would lead to such as this then he would’ve never.
And he’s also sure one of the others might’ve had hooked up but he’s only two percent sure. And he sure as hell isn’t asking.
“I might go ask Bruce. Or Dr. Helen Cho.” Bruce might be a better fit, since he’s closer, but the amount of times he’s emphasized he’s “not a doctor” to the group was high. Still, Steve has good enough reason to believe that he could give it a shot… “I’ll ask Bruce first.”
Natasha nods. “I’d go with you, but I’m sure Clint is wondering where I am. I promised to kick his ass in sparring but I needed to come make sure you weren’t doing anything dumb in here.”
Steve rolls his eyes, then pockets the test, moving to usher Natasha out of the room. “Yeah, yeah. Go easy on him. I’ll keep you updated.”
“You better,” Natasha says as she slips out of the door and sends Steve one last smile before walking down the hallway. And once she’s out of sight, Steve allows the smile to drop from his face, sighing and leaning on the doorframe.
There was only two ways his meeting with Bruce could go. The man could refuse and leave for some awkward encounters, or he could accept and risk more awkward encounters if the test came out either yes or no. Which Steve has a feeling it would only be one answer.
Yep, he was royally fucked.