Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Jesse let herself fall on the couch like it was a bed in a fancy hotel room. It didn't matter that the leather was old and peeling in places, or that there was a rather deep dip in the middle seat; she was so tired even a park bench would be attractive to sleep at the moment, even if she had sworn she would never do that again after that one time in Illinois.

She was so tired she was trying to get her desk to come to her via Launch ability, but she was having trouble making it move more than one clunky step at a time. Was it the fact she was barely focusing or that her powers seemed to be draining out too quickly?  Before she could get to a conclusion someone knocked on the door. She groaned, running a hand down her face. Who could it possibly be? She told the rangers outside she was done for the day. Was it an emergency?

She used her last bit of strength to sit down and unlock the door with her abilities, a trick she'd been mastering for some time now that was immensely handy. If she had to walk to the door she'd probably leave the person knocking until they gave up, if she was honest. 

Emily entered the room with a spring in her step and the vibrant smile she wore when she had figured a solution for a challenging matter. Her hair was as perfect as always, her clothes immaculate, she looked as full of energy as if she had just woken up in the morning. Jesse was suddenly very conscious about looking like a complete wreck in front of her. She hoped Emily wouldn’t start discussing whatever she found with her, she wouldn’t be able to focus at all in that stage, and falling asleep while she talked would be very disrespectful.

Luckily, Emily was too sharp not to notice what was going on as soon as she laid her eyes on her. "Jesse, are you—  were you preparing to sleep? God, I'm sorry!"

"I wasn't!" Jesse tried, but it sounded so fake she had to change subject very quickly. "What were you saying…?"

Emily furrowed her brow, put the files she carried down on Jesse's table and tilted her head slightly as she noticed it was positioned at an odd diagonal compared to the rest of the room. She looked around, searching for signs a House shift was imminent, but all she found were the obvious signs Jesse was preparing to rest and she intruded on it: Jesse’s exhausted complexion, the couch, jacket and boots thrown to the side with no care — the list went on.

"Nothing that can't wait" Emily replied, giving Jesse a knowing look. "The file will be here when you wake up."

"Are you sure I'm not going to wake up to a street sign eating people's pants if I don't take a look now?" Jesse said, a lazy smirk on her lips, but Emily looked more concerned than amused at her remarks. 

"I sure hope not! I don't know if I could stand looking at people after learning about their underpants preferences like that." Emily smiled back, impish at first but then surprisingly soft. "Please rest, okay?"

"Yeah." Jesse couldn't help but yawn. Her whole body was so heavy, she was under the impression she’d slide down the couch and pass out if she let her eyes close. "Can you throw me the blanket, by the way? It's tucked somewhere behind the desk."

"Oh, sure!" It was fairly easy to find the standard shelter-issued FBC blanket sticking out of a compartment in the desk. Jesse wasn't exactly careful when she tucked it inside. "Catch!"

She threw it, but it barely made midway to its destiny before it fell to the floor. They both stared at it for a second.

"You do need those 30 hours of field training, huh?" Jesse laughed, but even that was tired.

"Oh shut up!" Emily made an attempt at looking angry, but she almost immediately started laughing as well. She walked to the blanket, picked it up and handed it to Jesse, no throws involved this time. "Good night, and do jot down any particularly vivid dreams you have!"

"It can be relevant, yeah, I know." Jesse rolled her eyes playfully. Emily always told her to take notes; it was sweet, but she wouldn't take pen and paper to a paranatural fight, unless they were objects of power.

Emily left giggling, and the room was suddenly cold and silent again. Jesse took a second to ponder how her Head of Research seemed to embody the very archetype of the sun, carrying energy and warmth wherever she went. She could've gone further in her musings, wondering if that had a significance there inside the Oldest House or if it was a matter of it attracting archetypical people, but the truth was that she was way too tired for any of that. She could only focus on making herself comfortable on the couch, and within minutes she was fast asleep already.

—

Jesse was woken up by a strong light shining on her face. She groaned, turning on her side, and dragged the blanket over her head. If she remained still she would go back to sleep soon, and hell knew how she needed it — she could feel the dull aching on her muscles even through the haze of her half-awoken state.

Then, there was the sudden sound of a speaker being turned on, and it made her jump.

Attention, P7: your scheduled evaluation appointment is set to start within ten minutes. Please proceed with your preparations.

She cursed mentally. Ten minutes? She was so, so tired… Fuck it, she was going to ignore that one. She needed to rest.

It felt like she'd only had time to close her eyes when the next warning came:

Attention P7: you have 5 minutes before your scheduled evaluation appointment begins. Please get up and get ready — failure to do so will result in the revocation of your entertainment privileges.

"Fuck." Jesse groaned under her breath and kicked the blanket to the side, taking a couple of tries to sit down on the bed. She rubbed her eyes with her palm and sighed loudly, painfully - then got up in one go. 

There was nothing to see in the glass cell. It was small and unnerving, she hated it, but not as much as the assholes that issued commands from the control center up there, in that set of windows a level above her. She stared at it, fantasizing how nice it would be to hurl a giant rock right through that wall, concrete and glass flying everywhere, one of those assholes trapped under the sheer weight of it if she was lucky.

She shook her head. Death stared her in the eyes more than once. She caused it, even. It was a terrible thing, and it still haunted her in her dreams. The people up there would die for sure one day, messing with the kind of things they did, and it was probably going to be gruesome. She wasn't going to be the one to kill them, though.

Jesse went through the motions of basic hygiene and breakfast like a surprisingly dexterous zombie. When the message came to announce the guards were outside to escort her, she was chewing her toast with the enthusiasm of a funeral attendee, but she was quick to go the door. The sooner she went, the sooner it would be over, and she'd be back to the comfort of her music. At least they let her have her walkman.

The walk to the designated room was practiced, automatic. When the guards urged her past the usual door to somewhere further down the corridor, Jesse furrowed her brow in mild confusion. What did she do this time? She’d already paid her due for the lunch episode days before, what could it possibly be?

They stopped one door short of the last on the corridor, and one of the guards opened it for Jesse. She stopped right before entering, her expression going from confusion to a scowl. A test room? Really?!

"You're not Vaughn," she remarked, dryly.

The woman in the middle of the room looked eager, but also anxious behind her mask of calmness. She was stiff and held her clipboard with unnecessary strength. Jesse had become rather good at discerning signs of distress during her long years at the Bureau; she always caused it in people, voluntarily or not. Still, the glint of curiosity in that woman's eyes was genuine. Cute, even. It was a shame she would lose it very quickly.

"No, I'm not!" She smiled, offering Jesse a hand. "I'm Emily Pope, research specialist, pleased to meet you."

The guards pushed Jesse into the room and took their posts on each side of the door. Jesse just looked at Emily's hand, raising an eyebrow.

"I'm here to run some tests, if that's okay with you." Emily lowered her hand, but kept smiling.

"If that's okay with me? " Jesse repeated, momentarily taken aback. She was used to orders and monotone explanations, but this? Since when did they ask for her input on things?

"Of course. They're going to be non-invasive paranatural ability measurements executed using the Charter standards. I'll be happy to explain all the procedures if you want."

Jesse scoffed, then eyed her suspiciously. That couldn't be real. "Do you really work here?"

Emily tilted her head. "Yes, have been for five years now."

"Then you've read my file."

"The part of it that was available to me, yes."

"And you're still asking me if I want things?"

"Sure." She didn't bat an eye. "I prefer to do things the smoothest possible way, and that means asking for your consent."

"Like you wouldn't do it anyway if I refused!" Jesse started pacing around the lab, stopping to stare at the camera placed on the farthest corner. "What's the catch this time? Is Vaughn watching us? Darling? What fucked-up game are they playing now?"

"Dr. Vaughn had urgent matters to tend to, and I was given her time as an opportunity to collect some data. It's as straight as that. Could you please take a seat?"

Jesse turned back to face her. She looked firm and unbothered, but she was still holding her clipboard so tight her joints were white, of course she was. Jesse was oh so dangerous when she started getting angry, wasn’t she?

"What if I don't?" Jesse crossed her arms. 

Emily looked slightly disappointed. "Well, I was under the impression you liked music, from what I gathered. I even brought some tapes. Does the idea of breaking objects with your mind to the sound of rock music appeal to you?"

That was new, and surprisingly unlike the Bureau. There was no way Jesse's curiosity wouldn't betray her with such an offer.

"What do you got?"

Emily smiled, and it was warm like sunshine. "Let's take a look."

—

When Jesse heard the first notes of the melody, her legs got weak and she thought she would faint from the emotional whiplash. She hadn't listened to Metallica since Ordinary; she'd thought she never would again. It had been such a small part of her life then, and yet, if she’d known how much she'd miss it, and anything else from that time, for that matter...

Jesse only came back from her anguished stupor when the scientist, Pope, asked her if she was feeling well. Let's see: she was still locked inside that place like a prisoner but yes, she supposed she was feeling alright. Anything not to have to explain that she remembered her mother shouting for her to lower the volume on the sound system, and her father arguing that he’d been enjoying the music.

To her own surprise, Jesse still remembered the lyrics, song after song. It made the task of hurling, imploding, crumpling and smashing the most diverse mundane items on the improvised training range so much more enjoyable. She barely minded Pope there, pointing her devices and writing endless notes. It wasn't about her. It was about feeling mildly alive while reducing a construction beam to a crumpled ball, imagining it was Darling's head all the while.

"You are amazing!"

Jesse turned as she lifted a concrete box over her head, frowning with the sudden praise. Pope was there, staring at her with such awe and excitement she might as well be an old deity — or maybe a weird interplanar one, which seemed to be the sort of thing people enjoyed in this place — and it was so weird.

"The readings I'm getting, the sheer strength you've got — you're a force of nature!" Emily completed, giggling out of pure amazement. Jesse was stuck between a confused frown and an uncomfortable stare, seeing her expression. What was that woman's deal?

"I believe the official term is 'volatile and dangerous,' but you're the one who read the reports." Putting on her calm and collected mask again, Jesse turned back to her previous task, and sent the chunk of concrete flying in a wide arc towards a metal cube. It hit so hard it could technically be called a pyramid now, if one would excuse the very irregular faces. "Done. What now? I broke all your toys."

"Yes, and it was great! and I can't wait to analyze all this data!" Emily cleared her throat when she noticed how excited she was, and de-escalated. Jesse raised an eyebrow. "That'll be the end of the tests for today, I think. I'm very, very happy with your cooperation."

Jesse never thought she'd think something like this, but already? The music was still playing, it would be a shame to leave now. "Well, as long as you let me keep the tape." She pointed towards the radio with her head.

Pope looked at it and then back at Jesse. Her smile waivered. "I'm sorry, I'm not the one who decides that..."

"Well can you ask them? It's been fucking seventeen years I didn't hear those songs, and I want them." Jesse crossed her arms.

"Seventeen?" Pope looked surprised. Jesse could see in her eyes how she was doing some internal math, probably reconsidering some information. How much did Darling not tell her? "I'll ask, I promise. Meanwhile, I think we could stay a few more minutes and branch out on the telekinesis tests. Do you think you could show me a bit of your fine movement skills?"

Jesse nodded, raising a hand. The pen Pope was using flew out of her hand and started orbiting Jesse's, drawing a surprised gasp from the scientist. 

"Hey!" Emily faked offense, but she picked up a second pen from her front pocket right after it and started taking notes. "Please refrain from taking my office supplies while you're showing off, okay? I can only communicate your astounding feats if I'm able to write my reports."

Emily was clearly expecting Jesse to take the bait and fire some witty reply, but she was confused when it prompted a weary sigh out of her. She even lowered the floating pen, making it land on her palm.

"Like they'd serve for anything other than letting Darling gauge how many layers of reinforcement he should put in my cell."

"That's not what I… I meant it as I said it. You're an outlier, Jesse. Your abilities are amazing."

Jesse looked away. Darling used to say things like that before the first incident. It was just a question of time before this woman started thinking like that too. 

From the speakers, The Unforgiven played its melancholic introduction notes.

Chapter Text

Jesse woke up feeling rested, but bitter. The dream was still fresh in her mind, and she couldn't help but think of Dylan — the anger she felt in the dream, the hopelessness — that had been his daily life. He lost so much, even more than her, and It wasn't fair! He deserved the opportunity to walk out of the Bureau a free man, and experience all the things they took away from him. He deserved love, care, and a life as much as everyone else. 

I'll get rid of the Hiss , Jesse thought. We're going to find a way to bring him back. You're going to help, right?

Polaris flared on her vision, the sound of chimes bringing a familiar reassurance. Jesse realized how taut she was on the couch and took a deep breath, focusing on relaxing her muscles. She would’ve gone back to sleep like that, but she remembered she was the Director and a lot of people depended on her to get back to their lives outside the Bureau. Gotta get to work , she thought, rolled off the couch and fell to the floor. Well, that was an effective way of getting herself alert, if anything. She was very glad no one saw her unorthodox morning routine, though.

—

"...and they woke me up with a loud message. Did they do it to you as well? It's so cruel, I… I'm really sorry, Dylan."

Jesse always found some time in her day to pass by Dylan's cell and spend some time with him. She often talked about her day, what new oddities she found within the Bureau, her impressions on people — Things she'd like to chat with him about if he was awake and well. She hoped a small unconscious part of him could register those friendly conversations and comfort him, wherever he was now. She couldn't ask for more than that.

The doors opened behind her and took her out of her own mind, which was for the best, frankly. She had to focus on the present matters, and Emily was walking towards her with her usual quick steps, probably to ask if she looked at the files she left for her. Jesse felt like she was a teenager again, being reminded of a science project she didn't even start right at the beginning of the class she was supposed to do it for.

"Jesse! Arish told me you were here…" Emily stopped before her and took a glance at Dylan. "Came to get his bulletin, I take it?"

"Yeah, and tell him about my dreams. It's so ironic, you know? When he was awake, all he did was babble about his weird dreams, and now…" She trailed off, shook her head and eventually shrugged. 

"Hm, how very interesting."

Jesse turned back to face Emily, an eyebrow raised. Emily took the opportunity to elaborate. 

"I came here to inform you I had a strange dream as well, and woke up clutching this." She showed Jesse an old tape with a faded but unmistakable label: Metallica.

What the fuck?!

"That's the tape from my dream!" Her eyes widened. "You had this box full of tapes for-"

"For you to choose as we conducted tests!" Emily completed, as surprised as she could in all her practiced calm.

They exchanged a look, and it was obvious what they were both thinking: We had the same dream and a music tape appeared out of thin air — that's no coincidence.

"Is it an Altered item?" Jesse took the tape in her hands and immediately knew that wasn't the case, it didn't have the characteristic dense feeling to it, like it was a point of compressed energy.

"I believe it isn't, I've tried all known identification methods as soon as I got up and nothing elicited an altered response out of it. I was also informed the song inside is the same as the official release, but of course, the changes might be too subtle to observe without proper analysis of the soundwaves. If I take it to the acoustics lab and perform a—"

"Emily." Jesse called, before she got deeper into her own train of thought. It was true Jesse learned to appreciate how she could forget absolutely everything if you got her wrapped by a good scientific question, but right now there were other matters. "Have you eaten?"

"What?" She blinked. "I— Well…"

"Here." Jesse took a ration bar out of her pocket and placed it in her hand. "Now let's go look for whatever might've caused this dream."

—

It turned out they had exactly the same dream, but each from their own perspective. Emily filled in the details for her part as they walked, and how it complemented Jesse's: Dr. Darling called her in a hurry because apparently there was something wrong and classified with Trench that he'd have to deal with, and he was choosing to trust her with higher clearance matters, which would begin with her running some tests on a subject. In the dream it was a week after this first talk, and apparently she had written a whole paper on her impressions about the data Darling disclosed to her on the P7 case. She hadn’t known who Jesse was, nor when or how she’d come to be imprisoned in the Bureau, but she knew Jesse had a lot of powers and they tended to get out of control when she got mad. She assumed she was in solitary confinement for her own and everyone else’s safety.

They ended up in the Director's Office as Emily was telling Jesse about how genuinely impressed she had been at the telekinesis tests, and Jesse told her how she didn’t trust it at all in her side of the dream. There was a pause as they both stared at the big, ominous room. Jesse sighed.

"Well, let's get to work. What do we do?"

"We start with the identification incantations and see if anything reacts to them. Here, let me show you…"

Jesse had seen a lot of weird stuff at the Oldest House. She probably saw more on a daily basis than common folk saw in their whole lives, and even then she had to concede there was always something new and even weirder to surprise her when she least expected. This was one of such occasions: She never expected how surreal it would be to see Emily Pope, the scientific method incarnate, start saying nonsense in a ritualistic cadence that wouldn’t be out of place in a fake goth's ritual to Baphomet. To top it off, said nonsense consisting of words like barbecue and carbaldehyde.

What the hell is a carbaldehyde?!

Polaris shimmered in a way that felt to Jesse a lot like a shrug.

"Did you see anything react?" Emily asked, as serious as if she wasn't doing anything out of the ordinary, and Jesse had to suppress laughter before speaking again.

"N-no? No. Everything's the same."

Unfortunately for her, Emily was very sharp in her observational skills. "What's funny?"

"No, I don't—" Fuck! "It's just— this incantation! It's madness, and you're so serious about it it was funny and— oh don't mind me."

"Hm." Emily made a serious face like she was considering Jesse's words, but she couldn't keep it for more than three seconds before it cracked and she started having a good laugh. "I know, right?! It's ridiculous! It works, though. Wait until you hear the other instances."

Incantation two consisted of an accelerated chant of "bread, ravine, admonished, feline". Incantation three was a deadpan intonation of a variety of words all starting with F, which Jesse was very sure was made especially to mess with the tongue, even though Emily could pronounce it flawlessly. Incantation number four was a repetition of the words "Demonstration, demonized", and it was the one that elicited a response from their altered item: the folder with the report Emily left there the night before shot up and fell open on the table, flipping pages back and forth.

It made Emily incredibly offended. "Excuse me, my report is an altered item?!"

"It must've been so good even the unknown forces wanted to claim it!" Jesse snickered.

"Very funny. Good thing I have it backed up in the system and won't have to write it again."

"What was it about?" Jesse asked, and she raised her hands in defense as Emily sideeyed her. "Well I couldn't read it!"

"It inquired about the correlation of the Hiss resonance invading a host's brain and the sort of dreams it triggered, apparently designed to undermine the host's will and make a takeover easier." 

"So it dealt in dreams.” 

Jesse left the thread hanging and Emily promptly caught it. “Yes, I see the correlation. It makes perfect sense, of course — but my report!”

Jesse patted her on the shoulder. “Generations of Bureau scientists will study it from now on. It'll further the cause of science!"

Emily rolled her eyes, but the words made an effect on her: she let her shoulders drop and took softened her expression. "Well, no matter. We have to secure the item." When Jesse took a step forward, she interjected. "Wait, what are you doing?"

"Securing the item?" Jesse replied innocently.

"We need a box lined with Black Rock and protective gear— Jesse!"

She had walked forward while Emily talked, and looked at her over her shoulder.

"It's a bit different for me." She smiled a relaxed smile, hoping it would reassure Emily. Jesse had done it dozens of times by now, she knew what she was doing. Emily still looked conflicted, though. Well, the proof would have to be the act itself.

Jesse put her hands over the report and light started flashing around it like projections from a prism. There was resistance between the item and her, and Jesse seemed to grab at the air like she could yank it away by brute force alone. She made a bold motion down with her hands, and the prism lights burst out like a wave, fading as the report itself phased out of the room.

Emily, who had been alternating between staring dumbfoundedly and taking notes furiously, scoffed. "Where— what did you do?!"

"Cleansed it." Jesse shrugged. "It's probably in a cell in the Panopticon right now, I'm going to call Langston to check." She started rounding the table like it wasn’t a big deal.

Emily definitely thought it was a big deal indeed, and she rushed to the table while writing at a dizzying pace. "But how did you— Jesse, I don't think anything like that has ever happened in the Bureau, you have to give me more details! How exactly do you know the items go to the Panopticon? How do you teleport them?"

"It's what happened the other times. Hang on—" she raised a finger to ask for silence. "Langston? This is Jesse. Can you tell me if an Altered Item suddenly appeared in any empty cell over there?" They both waited for the response with bated breath. "Right. No, don't worry, it should be safe. I mean, I'm sure Emily will want to get there as soon as possible to test it." Jesse grinned, laying her eyes on Emily. She nodded effusively. "So maybe be ready for that. Yeah, that's it. Thank you. Bye!"

"So it's really there." Emily scoffed and looked away, something she did when she couldn’t believe something. 

"Yep!" Jesse was still grinning. "Langston will be ready for your visit, go have fun."

"Oh you bet I will!" Emily turned back to face her and her eyes sparkled with what Jesse called the 'research fever'. "And I will want to know everything about your cleansing method when I get back. If we could replicate it, it could mean so much in terms of cleansing the Bureau of harmful energies!"

"Whenever you want." Jesse took a glance at the clock on her table by mere chance, and noticed the time. "Actually, whenever you want, after I go talk to Arish about the Hiss that’s still in the Research sector." She scratched the back of her neck.

"Of course. Our brave Director Faden must always put our security first!" 

"Emily!" Jesse groaned and pinched the bridge of her nose. 

Emily just chuckled and waved in response, quickly turning back and leaving the room.

Jesse stared at the closed door for a good moment, right at the point where Emily left. It was amazing how she still teased Jesse with the Director thing and got away with it every time; She was the only one who could, and Jesse never really knew why it didn't annoy her as much when it was Emily saying it. Maybe it was because she accepted her right from the start, with no judgement and no qualms about calling her by her name? Or was it because she had that friendly air about her that made Jesse feel safer than with other people? What if it was because  she'd been feeling something electric inside every time they were being playful with each other, lately?

She stopped her train of thought right there. She didn’t want to fall down that rabbit hole when she had to go see Arish soon. She was the Director. She had to take care of people, the Hiss wouldn't vanquish themselves, the House could get all sort of messed-up if she didn’t pay attention — her inner turmoil would only get in the way of her responsibilities.

Polaris shimmered on the edge of her vision, urging her to take a step back and actually try to think about those things.

Jesse crisped her lips. You know I don't have time for that.

The way the prisms turned and sharpened at the edges, Polaris would've huffed if she had a mouth to do it.

—

The day was fairly uneventful, as much as a day in lockdown inside the Oldest House could be. Jesse shot a bunch of Hiss, secured some more rooms to install HRA towers into, found a vending machine shifted into a wall 10ft in the air in the Investigations Sector. She made sure the rations they had were enough not to need a supply incursion in the more dangerous areas of the House for a while, ran after a couple of loose Mold Hosts in Research and sent some Rangers to the weekly mold-burning tasks. When she was finally back at the Director's Office, she crashed on the couch and fell asleep so fast she didn't even remember to get out of her work clothes. 

—

Jesse overslept. She usually relied on Polaris to wake her up at the right time, she had clockwork precision when it came to that, but this time she must've judged it wise to let Jesse rest as much as she could, by the looks of it. The clock marked two in the afternoon. 

She'd been using the Oceanview Motel for showering since she discovered she could influence its dream logic somewhat. It was simple enough to wish for a bathroom and get one inside a room, even if she had to perform assorted rule-of-three rituals to get to it. Her plan was to take a quick wake-up shower and bolt to Central Executive to learn what sort of crisis she had to deal with because she overslept, but as soon as the hot water hit her shoulders she let out a borderline vulgar sigh, and all her thoughts were pointed at how sore her whole body was. She needed to rest further, she realized, and Polaris' chimes were a gentle agreement in her ears.

God, when this is over I'm giving everyone a week off, including myself. I'll rent a room somewhere and get myself a masseuse. I fucking need it.

Polaris sent an image to her mind, and Jesse almost choked on shower water — it had to do with a familiar blonde co-worker with her hands on her shoulders.

I'm not — Polaris! 

The sound of chimes ringing in her ear were a lot like a good-natured chuckle.

—

"So, what did I miss?"

Jesse took a furtive glance to the clock on the wall beyond Arish, and it informed her it was 3:26pm. How did she take that much time in the shower?! That was a disaster! She was officially a disaster Director. Bad Jesse.

"Nothing big. We're making progress with the Hiss in the Astral Exhibition, no news from Containment and Maintenance, but I believe Pope was looking for you earlier." Arish gave her his usual affectionate look and nothing more, he didn't look like he even knew of Jesse's slip.

Do you think people see me so busy all the time they just assume I'm somewhere killing Hiss if I vanish for a while? Because that's very handy.

With no answer to her mental question, Jesse thanked Arish and headed to the Board Room. She always smirked unknowingly while ascending those steps. What did Emily whip up for her this time?

"Jesse, hi!" Emily was writing on one of the whiteboards to the side of the room. It was funny how they'd passed from one to three, to five, and now there were seven lining the walls; Emily worked way too much.

"I hear you were looking for me?" Jesse approached, taking a better look at that particular board. She didn't understand a thing about it, like always.

"I was. Did you sleep well?"

There was no trace of teasing in the question, but Jesse still blushed. Of course she'd know. "I uh… Yeah. Like a stone."

"Any dreams worth telling?"

She paused, considering. "I don't remember. I think there were doctors from a psychiatric ward chasing me at some point…?"

"Wow." She snickered with the mental image. "What an interesting scenario for your mind to make."

"Not really.” Jesse shrugged. “It looked a lot like the last time it happened." 

Emily blinked, eyes widening for a second, then looked away and shook her head. She was probably berating herself mentally, if Jesse had to guess. "Sorry, I forgot."

Jesse wasn't sure of how much Emily had seen of the P7 files, since their focus had been on the P6 ones and anything they could use to help bring Dylan back from the coma. That said, they did discuss Jesse's life a couple of times in more friendly situations, and she'd mentioned how she spent a lot of time in psychiatric wards after "psychotic episodes" that were actually caused by PTSD from Ordinary. She'd mentioned with amused laughter how the staff of one of the wards was probably still looking for her after she absconded to come to the Bureau.

"It's alright. I'd love to see their faces now that I can fly and three-point land on their doorstep lifting a car with my mind."

"Please don't, we'd have to arrest you."

"Excuse me, I'm the Director!"

Emily gasped. "Abuse of power!"

They looked at each other and laughed. Emily’s laughter was so spontaneous, so different from Jesse’s. Hers was lower in tone, quieter somehow, a product of too much time afraid of expressing herself. She doubted Emily ever had that problem, she meant every word she said and everything she did, and if anyone had a problem with that they were welcome to come and sort it out. It amazed Jesse to no end how sharp she could be defending her ideas, but also how kind and helpful she usually was to people around her. 

Their eyes met when the laughter was dying. They both sustained the stare, and suddenly Jesse thought that something might be wrong - did she overstep? Did Emily actually think she meant her words?

“I just— that was a joke, okay? I wasn’t going to—”

“I know, don’t worry!” Emily snickered, then directed her gaze to the files on the table. She went there. picked one up and returned. “Anyway, it’s good to know you had more… Normal dreams tonight. It shows Black Rock lining works to limit the area of effect of the Report.”

“Oh, that. Is it okay if I keep that Metallica tape? You forgot to take it back.”

“I will want to conduct further studies on it at some point, but sure. Please take notes of what you feel when you listen to it, though, I’m very interested in whether or not it has any properties we weren't able to detect on the previous tests. Did you know that was the only instance of a physical object being created as a result from an event directly happening in a dream? We triggered the altered item several times and nothing like the tape ever happened.”

“So it is special, huh.”

“I think not particularly. I believe the trick might lie either in the length and significance of the dream or the people involved; everyone knows how unique you are." She smiled, unashamed and bright.

Jesse wasn’t expecting the compliment. It hit her like a slap on the face, made her eyes go wide before she regained her cool and nodded towards Emily with a little smile. "That's a nice way to say weirdo, thanks."

"That's absolutely not what I meant." Emily tried to poke her with the back of the marker, but she dodged it effortlessly. "You're the most paranaturally-inclined individual to ever set foot in this Bureau and you know it."

Jesse's smile widened, but it still didn't betray all the buzz she was feeling inside with the compliment, even if it was completely professional. She'd become too prolific at hiding her feelings under a mask of calm over the years. It had been a matter of survival.

"So? You're the smartest person in this Bureau and you know it, Madam Head of Research. Who knows if the dream wasn't responding to your amazing intellect?"

"It very well might be, or even to both of us. There's only one way to find out."

Emily's eyes had that unmistakable sparkle to them, and Jesse hurried to find a response to mess with her: "Tests, of course." She chuckled. "What do you have in mind?"

"It's very simple, really: You and I are going to sleep in the cell with the Report and see what happens."

"Wow, and you're not even going to treat me to dinner first?" Jesse snickered.

"...What?" Emily tilted her head.

She put a hand on her shoulder, as she did when she was embarrassed. "You know, because we… Oh, never mind."

Why did I have to go and say that?! God…

Polaris shimmered in her view, her sounds like muffled laughter. Jesse scoffed at her mentally.

You're very cheeky these days, aren't you?

Unaware, Emily continued pursuing answers. "We can certainly have dinner before we go, if that's the matter…"

Jesse just waved her off. 

Please don't make me explain the joke, it was terrible, especially because of the innuen — oh don't you dare Polaris!

Emily watched as Jesse seemed to be having a mental argument and raised an eyebrow. She couldn't understand what caused all that fuzz. Of course she and Jesse could have dinner together, it was always awesome to have her around: She was easy to talk to, she only interrupted her ramblings about science when they had some other matter they should be talking about, and she was so kind… Plus, they'd go to the Panopticon together, afterwards. What was the matter?

"Well, that's settled then." Jesse got up all of a sudden, but as calm as ever. "See you at the cafeteria at, say, ten?"

"I'll be there." Emily nodded. "Bring your pajamas!" She giggled.

"Sleepover party, FBC style!" Jesse raised a fist in the air as she walked out. At the moment the door closed she let out the breath she'd been holding, though. Why was she so weird with people?! She probably made a fool of herself inside, and even if she could hide it very well behind her usually blank expression, she still had to feel the embarrassment of it. And now she was going to sleep in the same room as Emily and she made a terrible innuendo about it. What if she realized what she was talking about? Would things get awkward between them? Jesse didn’t want that. She just wanted to hang out with her and relax, enjoy the moment. That shouldn’t be so difficult.

She's going to be all focused on the test, anyway. She's not going to notice if you stare like a dumbass. You two are going to sleep for science, it's not a real sleepover.

Her mind argued back that she didn't really know what a sleepover was like, she’d never had one. It was hard to mess up something you had no parameters for.

It's actually easier to mess something up if you don't know the rules! Jesse protested. 

She didn't want to upset Emily. She was the closest person she'd ever had after Ordinary, she was her friend; Jesse spent so long without those, she feared she wasn't good at keeping them anymore.

I'm glad I always have you, though.

Polaris felt warm like a blanket over her.

—

Chapter Text

"So far, there are two verified ways to trigger the Report's effect: Either you fall asleep in its vicinity and it influences you passively, or you leaf through the pages and it'll induce sleep and dreaming. For this experiment, we'll try to recreate the conditions on the first dream event, so we're going to let it influence us passively. Any questions?"

"How do you know it won't just affect one of us this time and not the other?" Jesse asked, getting her hair loose from the ponytail.

Emily paused for a second. She'd never seen Jesse with her hair down and it was a sight that brought unwarranted butterflies to her stomach. There were always so many things expected of Jesse, so much she had to do, it wasn't surprising how she always seemed ready to take on an army. This moment, though, was the opposite of that: a moment of respite. The right to unbind her hair, unbind herself and rest. Emily knew for a fact it wasn't exactly easy for her to do it, so it made it even more meaningful how she was willing to be in the same room as her and let her guard down like that. She trusted her that much. It warmed Emily's heart.

However, she couldn't let herself be distracted by that. She had science to do, questions to answer. She could be silly and emotional later. "Because we've tested it. Every time there were multiple people in the room the Report acted on all of them. I had groups of two, three and four people try it, varying subjects in on themselves."

"Yeah, okay, I should know you'd cover all the bases." Jesse gave her an apologetic nod, and Emily smiled.

"Thank you. I still like to explain it, though. Are you ready to sleep?"

Jesse nodded. "Always. You?"

"Let's do it."

They both got in their respective bedrolls — which they took from spare ranger gear — and the scientist in charge of watching them from outside turned off the lights, leaving only a spotlight shining directly on the altered Report. 

Emily didn't tell Jesse, but she was the kind of person who lays down on the bed and takes a while to be able to sleep due to the sheer influx of data from the day their brain throws at them to process. She thought about various topics her researchers were pursuing and how she could assist them the next few days, about her own research, the Hiss, and Dylan. She was in the habit of keeping a notepad close in case she had an idea while she was about to sleep, so she opened her eyes to search for it and noticed Jesse sleeping on the other side of the room, face partially covered by the pillow. Like this, the calm on her face was different than when she was awake — there was a softness to it that made her look at peace, as opposed to the wary placidness she usually had going on. It put a smile on Emily's face. 

"Sweet dreams, Jesse." She mumbled to herself before closing her eyes again.

—

She was in Darling's Central Research office. He was sitting across from her on the desk like a statue, and that was never a good sign. Darling was incapable of holding still, he was always shifting and fiddling, compelled by a hundred ideas crashing inside his head like shooting stars. Unless, of course, it was something grave — then he'd stay still, probably thinking about said thing over and over until he could release the entropy of it somehow. Emily knew this time it would be by berating her. She expected it. She just didn't remember what it was about...

"Emily, first and foremost, I want to say all the data you've collected these last months has been invaluable to our understanding of applied telekinesis, parakinesiology and parapsychology."

Under normal circumstances, Emily would've grinned and thanked Dr. Darling effusively for the recognition, something he was starting to do only now after years of hard work. This time, however, she kept her expression carefully neutral. He was just stroking her ego to soften the blow, and she knew better than to fall for it.

"I think you're ready to go higher. What do you say? We could use you as sub-chief of Parakinesiology."

He chuckled, but the smile never reached his eyes. He was tense. His stiff shoulders betrayed him. 

He was never very good at that. She thought.

"That's very generous of you, sir, but as we've discussed before, I work better by being in touch with a myriad of fields at once instead of diving deeper into the one subject. I believe I'm better put to use right where I am at the moment. There's so much we can discover about innate paranaturality if we keep walking this course!"

"Oh yes, yes, I had a feeling you'd say that." Darling scratched behind his ear and pursed his lips. Hesitated. The blow was coming. "I will have to pull you out of the P7 project."

She was expecting a lot of things: heavy scolding, a monologue, belittling, even some veiled threats. She didn't think Darling would go right to the point like that, especially with such a regretful tone.

"But sir, why? We've been making phenomenal progress, I thought—"

"You're developing an attachment to subject P7." He cut her off matter-of-factly, like a teacher enumerating execution mistakes in front of the class. She hated it.

"That's not true. I am merely being friendly."

He raised an eyebrow. "Jesse is not your friend, Emily. She's a powerful and unstable parautilitarian who's confined for a reason."

"That doesn't mean I have to act cold towards her, sir. You see, I think that's actually the problem—"

"She's killed people, Emily." Darling stared right into her eyes. "Injured more than a dozen others."

That new information made Emily pause. "Can you please elaborate, sir?"

"You want to—" He scoffed and looked away, clearly incredulous, then stared back at her. "What is there to elaborate, Emily? She killed people! Isn't that enough?"

She never looked away, or changed her tone. She didn’t know all the facts. She couldn’t judge the whole picture with pieces missing. "I just want to know the circumstances. It's useful data for a hypothesis I'm entertaining, and I'm sure it would be beneficial if you gave me a moment to explain—"

"Well I don't want to give you a moment!" He raised his voice, then noticed what he was doing and let himself fall back on his armchair. He massaged his temple like he was trying to explain something very basic to a very dense person, and it was giving him an acute headache. "You don't know her, Pope."

"And I'm gathering strong evidence that seventeen years weren't enough for you to see the obvious truth in front of you, sir: you can't raise a kid like a lab rat in a cage and expect them to be thankful."

Darling's eyes got so big they were threatening to jump out of their sockets, and he was suddenly so flustered one could think he'd been hanging upside down for a while. "How did you…?!"

The phone started ringing with a loud an ugly sound, breaking the rising tension. Darling took a glance at the light flashing — Emily could see it was the one with a six under it — and picked it up with unnecessary brutality.

"Dr. Darling." He answered. Emily saw his demeanor change to one of surprise and then indignation the more he listened to the person on the other side, and she couldn't help but wonder what could be so important to have Darling hear it uninterruptedly like that. He loved to talk over other people; loved the sound of his own voice. "I see. Please try to remain calm, Carla. I'm coming."

Carla? Emily's sharp mind was drawn to the name like it was a magnet. Carla. Carla Vaughn, the one who ran the psychological appointments with Jesse? What was going on, was she okay? Was Jesse okay?

"I'll bring more rangers with me, yeah. Sit down and have a cup of water, I'll be right there."

Okay, it sounded like she was fine at the moment, yes, but she was about to not be anymore.

Please don't let them shoot her!

Darling hung up and groaned in frustration, almost slapped his sidelight to the floor, thought better of it and took a deep breath. Only then he looked back at Emily, and she took the opportunity to fire her questions away.

"Sir, what's happening to Je—"

" You will stay here — " Again he raised his voice, almost shouting, and caught himself just in time to stop. " — while I deal with this, and then we'll finish our conversation."

He stormed out the room and Emily took a second to follow — enough for Darling to get a security guard to come and "escort" her back inside quite rudely. He took a post in front of the double doors and looked straight at Emily, who rolled her eyes.

Oh, now I'm a prisoner. Wonderful.

The only thing she could do was wait, but she’d be damned if she wouldn’t make the most of her time.

—

She’d been drawing a complex graph in one of Darling’s spare whiteboards when the ranger walked in. It represented the intersections between thermodynamics, telekinesis, organic matter and unstable mindscapes as time progressed, and she lost her train of thought completely when she heard her name called. She’d known she’d probably be interrupted, but it was never a pleasant moment. She turned, the mask of professionalism already on, and waved the marker loosely at the ranger.

“That would be me.” Emily said.

“Dr. Darling requests I escort you to the Containment Sector.”

There was a very unpleasant flip in Emily’s stomach. She felt ice in her hands

What’s going on?!

—

There was a rock bigger than a car embedded in the middle of the P7 cell control room. It opened a gigantic hole in the wall and buried half of the thick command console under it. There was debris everywhere: Chunks of concrete of all sizes, metal plating and hardware pieces, broken glass covering the floor like glistening diamonds, paperwork. Some of the lamps malfunctioned, probably because of damaged cables. Despite the war scene, Dr. Darling, his squad of Rangers and the command room operators all turned to look at Emily when she arrived. A lot of them had scratches and superficial cuts, but none of it was serious by the looks of it. Even the guy who was pressing a coat to a large cut on his shoulder didn't look like he would faint anytime soon. 

“Thank God you’re here.” Dr. Darling pressed a button on an operational part of the console, getting closer to the intercom. If he was going to spare Emily no more than a glance, she could very well use that time to look through the big hole in the room. “Can you hear me?"

Emily had never seen the P7 cell before. The farthest she was allowed to go was the corridor immediately behind the safe doors, where the test rooms were situated. Jesse had talked — more complained — about the cell sometimes, only enough to give her the idea it was small and had no privacy whatsoever. Now, the thing Emily saw was the exposed spine of what it had been, bent, crushed and twisted beyond recognition. That sheer level of destruction would've been enough to impress her, but it was nowhere close to the craziest thing going on down there: Five feet in the air and in the middle of the room was Jesse, floating completely unbothered inside a tornado of glass, concrete and broken metal. It was the most awesome and definitely most terrifying thing Emily had ever seen and yet, her heart skipped a beat in relief.

She's unharmed. She's amazing…

Jesse noticed Emily looking from the hole and got up from her sitting position. She was propelled up through the air until she was at Emily's level and waved in greeting. All of the rangers immediately pointed their rifles at her.

Emiky took a step forward and waved back, gingerly.

"As you can see, Pope's here like you asked." Darling said in the intercom, and his voice reverberated through the speakers around the cell. "Please stop destroying the containment area."

The rock embedded in the room shifted, and everyone took one or half a dozen steps back from their positions. Soon it was rolling back towards the hole, and it fell with a loud bang on the floor below. The debris still left inside started flying around, rearranging itself until it formed a shifting barrier between Emily and the rest of the people and then — only then — Jesse floated inside the room.

The vortex of debris around her stopped outside and fell when she crossed the threshold, no longer supported by Jesse’s telekinesis. She stepped forward and the floating debris curved in her wake, shielding her back from harm. It looked like magic to Emily, and she abhorred the use of that term to describe anything —  anything but Jesse now, she guessed. An avatar of higher fury and loss, relenting to the sight of her.

"Hi there, Pope." Jesse said nonchalantly, her lips curling up in a small smile. "Did you bring me a tape?"

Aw, fuck. "I'm sorry, I didn't have the time to look for…" She checked the pockets 

of her lab coat in a vain attempt to find anything and felt a rectangular object in one of them. She pulled it out: It was labelled as Frank Sinatra. She recognized the tape, it was hers, but she was sure she never put it there. "All I got is this classic, I'm afraid. Do you care to hear some of my music this time?"

"Will it make me sleep?" Jesse teased.

"It might. It doesn't have any of your preferred overdriven guitars on it." Emily shrugged.

"Bo-ring!" 

"That's me alright."

Jesse actually paused and gave her an appraising look. "The things I do for science." She gestured to her back, and chunks of concrete arranged themselves in a makeshift seat of sorts. "Hop in, I'll get you down."

Emily opened her mouth to question the safety of it, but she thought better of it. She took a glance at the Bureau personnel on the other side of the debris barrier, all their firearms trained on Jesse, and she decided she definitely didn't want to be like them. She sat on her concrete throne and nodded.

"You see how much better things go when we can agree with each other, Darling?" Jesse's smile widened to the point of being unsettling towards the people on the other side. Still, when she turned back to Emily, it had changed to one of excitement. "Hold on."

She took impulse and floated out of the room, carrying Emily along for the ride.

—

"You destroyed this place, threw a rock at the control room, risked being shot and got Darling down here so you could see me, is this what I'm getting?"

Emily had a sense she should be very worried. Instead she wondered why her sense of self preservation decided to malfunction all of a sudden, because her heart was pounding in excitement.

Jesse shrugged. "It's been two weeks. I was afraid Darling fired you and I'd never see you again."

"I guess you'll be pleased to know your timing was exceptionally right. He was about to."

Jesse opened a smile that was equal parts mischievous and bright, wide as Emily had never seen before. Genuine. Emily saw herself smiling as well.

“Did you tell him to shove it?”Jesse clicked her tongue.

Emily’s eyes widened. “Of course not! He’s my boss!”

“Boring.”

“I told him he couldn’t keep you in a cage and expect you to behave.”

Jesse opened her mouth for a moment, her brow creasing in confusion, but it was suppressed as soon as it came. “Yeah, that would do it. You’re so lucky I’m here, Pope... Now tell me: do you want to stay?”

Emily saw Jesse, usually sarcastic and fearless, always unbothered in the face of whatever the Bureau threw at her, waiver with her question. Do you want to stay? Emily processed the question in her mind. It was weird. Jesse, vulnerable? It suddenly clicked — What Jesse really meant was: Do you want to stay with me? She realized she had an answer to that on the tip of her tongue already. “Of course I do! Who else would bring you science and songs?”

Jesse’s smile returned, and it was everything Emily had hoped for.

“I can even stand this Frank Sinatra guy for that.”

—

Chapter Text

"Jesse, are you awake?"

"Mm-hm."

"That was amazing!" Emily gasped. "We returned to the same dream at a different point in time! The implication this could have—"

"Emily, please" Jesse groaned painfully. "I just woke up."

"Oh, sorry." Emily bit her lip. She reached for the notepad she left by the bedroll, laying on her side to take notes. Jesse pinched the bridge of her nose, groaned again and hid her face on the pillow.

"Fuck." Came the muffled curse, and with it Jesse rolled out of the bedroll, got on her knees and then to her feet. She brushed the hair out her face and turned to Emily. "What are you doing?"

"Writing the important parts before I forget something."

"Don't forget to add how Frank Sinatra is— oh hey there."

Emily looked up and raised an eyebrow at Jesse. She picked something up at the pedestal where the Report was located, then showed it to her: Frank Sinatra — greatest hits.

"Another one!" Emily sat down like someone hit her with an electric shock, and reached out to get the tape. "Remarkable! Now we only need to ascertain if the manifestation occurs due to us or the duration of the dream…"

"Okay I'm starving." Again, Jesse interfered. "Why don't we discuss this over breakfast?"

"Oh" The way she stopped made Jesse a hundred percent sure she forgot she needed to eat, due to her excitement for science. "Of course." She waved to the researcher outside of the cell and gave him a thumbs up. The door was unlocked with a click. "Will you have the yesterday rations or the today rations?"

Jesse frowned, tilting her head to the side. Emily looked at her with her bed hair and dark circles under her eyes, and thought she was gorgeous. It wasn’t fair.  

"Anything, as long as they have coffee…"

—

Emily liked her coffee bitter, with just the right amount of sugar to make it bearable. She wasn't a coffee person, though — it usually messed with her stomach and gave her headaches, her father always said it was because she already ran at a hundred percent at all times. She could have a cup when she was especially tired, but she usually settled with tea — a myriad of flavors to choose from, comforting, softer to her palate. Right from the beginning she thought Jesse was a coffee person, but in no way she could predict how obscene the amount of sugar her Director usually put in her coffee would be. 

"Are you aiming for a sugar mountain surrounded by a coffee lake with your sculpture, Jesse? I think it's going along pretty well."

"Oh shut up Emily, I'm going to pour more coffee there." Jesse tried to hide the laughter but her expression was betraying her, so she took a bite of the protein bar to mask it. Ugh, she hated those things.

"Right. Anyway, can we talk about a serious matter now?"

Jesse's whole demeanor changed to one of focus in an instant. "Sure."

"Do you really think Frank Sinatra is bad?"

"Oh Jesus, Emily!" Jesse brushed her hair back and started laughing, letting her posture relax.

"What? This is serious!" Emily chuckled with her, and it was good to be able to just joke around like that. It was so difficult with everyone, and so easy with Jesse. "The man is a legend, his songs have transcended generations—"

"So what? Still sounds like the stuff they put on repeat everywhere at the holiday season, and you don't have a clue how many of these I had to endure—"

"That's preposterous!" Emily huffed, and it helped check that Jesse's smile was still there before going on. It was all still banter. "Have you actually stopped and listened to him? He's miles over Christmas music!"

"Right, but he has done them, hasn't he?"

"He did, but—"

"Aha, gotcha!" Jesse pointed an accusatory finger at Emily, fully aware how silly it all was. "Can't respect him after that."

"You're making a grave mistake, Director!" Emily crossed her arms. "It might tear us apart forever and ever."

"Oh no, what must I do to prevent that?" Jesse grabbed her mug and took a sip of her coffee. Suddenly her eyes got wide.

"You have to compromise to hear at least one song I'll pick up for… Why the grimace, did you— Oh it's the sugar, isn't it?!"

"No!" Jesse swallowed and said in protest, but the damage was already done; Emily was laughing uncontrollably on the other side of the table. "And if you're going to make me hear grandpa songs like that, you have to hear one of mine as well. Equivalent exchanges and everything."

"Sure, sure." Emily was trying to recover her composure, but that wasn't going all that well for her. Jesse’s embarrassed expression only fuelled her laughter. "As long as it's not incoherent guttural screaming, I'm well equipped to survive it."

"Deal." Jesse offered a hand.

"Deal." Emily shook it over the table.

They both started laughing all over again, until Jesse got up to search for more coffee. Emily then focused on eating and thinking more about that altered Report. She juggled some theories around in her mind, considered some points, and when she noticed she had already covered her side of the table in post it notes, mumbling to herself as she wrote. 

"...so if we consider that the timeline kept going since we were inside the last time, we can conclude…"

"Coffee's here." Jesse’s return made Emily jump on her seat, but she didn’t notice it, apparently. She sat down again and took a sip of her coffee, tilting her head like a curious puppy. "What did I miss?"

"I'm just accounting for the fact that we weren't transported to a different dream or the point in that specific dream where we left it." Emily said, not looking away from her notes. "Instead, we jumped to a point in the future in that same dream, impling that A: The altered item transported us to a fixed location and B: that it might not be generated by the item, unless it is constructing dynamic timelines, which would make it incredibly powerful."

Jesse nodded, but her expression betrayed her confusion. "Explain it to me like I was five."

"I believe the Report isn't making us share our dreams; it's transporting our minds to alternative timelines."

"...wow." Jesse blinked. "That's sick!"

"It really is." She grinned. "Which means there is a reality where you have threatened and thrown a gigantic rock at my former boss, and I'm sure that makes you happy."

"Very!" Jesse chuckled. "It's also a reality where you looked at me destroying a containment facility and thought it was a good idea to stick by my side."

Jesse's voice became so soft. Emily raised her eyes from the paper to see her with an equally soft expression towards her, and it made her heart skip a beat. Jesse usually radiated this aura of toughness and, why not, power, that it baffled Emily how she could go to the completely opposite direction so easily and let herself be vulnerable. How could she think Emily would ever do something other than stay, in the face of that?

"You were destroying it because you wanted to see me. You made walls of debris to make sure we wouldn't be hurt, and you levitated me on a throne so we could have a chat in your cell. I wasn't afraid of you; I was mesmerized."

"You're very weird, Emily." Jesse's smile was small, but oh so sweet. Emily held her breath. She wanted to hold her hand and run her fingers through her hair until she relaxed and made a home in her arms. Would Jesse know then that she didn't need to fear her leaving? "I was terrified."

"Really? You didn't look like it."

"I never do, but I was. I— You were the only one who cared. I knew it, I could feel it, and Polaris agreed. I was terrified Darling would take you away from me."

Emily knew it wasn't proper, she knew there were a dozen people around who could very well interpret things the wrong way, and she knew her own feelings on the matter compromised her judgement. She hadn’t cared for any of that before, and she wasn't about to start just because she was now Head of Research and the woman before her was the Director; She picked Jesse's hand and squeezed it, kissed her knuckles lightly.

"I'd find a way to come back, trust me."

Something flashed on Emily's vision. Circling motions, reflecting lights. It was there just for a second, but it was enough to catch her attention. "Did you see this?"

"What?"

"A sort of light… It might've been a trick." She slipped her hand away from Jesse's and shook her head. "Anyway, I definitely need to perform more tests. This altered item might have beneficial applications if we can understand exactly how it operates. Are we transported to our alternative selves and so are we able to influence their actions as if we were in control, or does the item follow a more traditional dream logic where we think we're in control but are only acting out the narratives already in motion in that particular reality? Does our interference change outcomes in any way?"

"Do you think we could use it to get to Dylan?"

Emily paused. She was so absorbed in her own thoughts she didn't register Jesse's words properly. "Hm?"

"The report acts when we're dreaming, right? Well, he's dreaming. Maybe it could transport us to his dream — or alternative reality, or whatever. We could try to have him wake up."

"I don't think that's how it would work, Jesse." Emily bit her lip as Jesse’s expression fell. "But it's not a meritless road to pursue. We'd have to narrow the focus of our research, run some tests on the viability of using the altered item with already sleeping test subjects…"

Emily's words fell to a mumble, and she ripped a page from her notebook to start writing on a fresh one. Dylan Faden. Could they bring him back by using an Altered Item? She knew he was Jesse’s whole world, she had to consider matters carefully, but she could also see where Jesse was coming from with her question and honestly, it was an exciting thought. Emily was now Head of Research for a reason; she’d think of something.

"We could try, yes. I'll personally oversee it." Emily's eyes sparkled with the challenge. Her mind was already calculating the inner workings of moving a team to research that particular subject, which apparel they'd have to have fetched from the Research Sector, the proper protocols...

Jesse opened a full smile, one similar to the one she gave Emily in their shared dream/alternate reality. Emily found it gave her butterflies in the stomach the very same way in.

—

The next two weeks were very intense. Jesse kept at the endless grind of destroying the Hiss only for them to appear somewhere else in the House, and Emily spent half her days testing and coming up with hypotheses on how to eradicate them, and the other half testing and gathering every information she could on the altered Report. More than once the two women met to discuss progress and ended up falling asleep on their chairs, leading to neck pain and pitiful laughing when they eventually woke up hours later. In those occasions they both contemplated sending everything to hell and holding the other in their arms, getting comfortable on a corner and going back to sleep that way, but unaware of the other’s thoughts, they never acted on it. 

"Hey Dylan, it's today! We're finally bringing the Report here. I can't wait. I even had trouble sleeping, since Emily gave me the green light. They're going to set it up any moment now!"

Jesse couldn't hide the excitement in her expression, or the way she was trembling slightly. She put a hand on the glass. Nothing changed inside the cell, except from the health monitor showing Dylan's heart rate. A small part of Jesse always hoped he'd respond when she was there talking to him, maybe twitch a finger, grunt or even trigger his powers, but nothing like it ever came to pass. It was frustrating but expected, and all she could do was steel her resolve and conform with reality. That morning, his lack of response didn't even bother her. This time she'd be able to try something new! She'd bring him back, like she wanted for so long!

"Ah, there you are." Emily entered the room with four scientists in tow, all of them carrying complex machines Jesse had only seen glimpses of when passing through Research. Emily herself carried several coils of cables, and Jesse promptly raised a hand and had them levitate to the middle of the room. "Thank you, those were heavy. I thought I'd find you already here."

"Yeah, I was just telling Dylan…" Jesse put a hand on her own shoulder, her voice dying down. Yes, she talked to her comatose brother all the time. Was it pitiful? Maybe, but she wasn't about to stop now. "Just informing him we're going to do the test today."

Emily nodded like it was no big deal, and a small weight lifted from Jesse's shoulders. "It should take some time to set up the equipment. Have you eaten? Now would be a good time."

"I uh… I'm not hungry."

"Jesse."

"What? I'm anxious, I can't eat like that."

Emily produced a ration bar from her pocket, smiled a clever smile and put it on Jesse's hand.

"Someone did this to me some days ago. Now, out!"

She practically dragged Jesse out of the room while she whimpered in hushed tones how she didn't want to leave Dylan alone because he might be scared of all the machines, or feel abandoned, or get uneasy with a lot of scientists around.

“It’s absolutely understandable that you’re afraid, Jesse.” Emily put a hand on her shoulder and squeezed. “But it’s going to be okay. We’re not going to start the test without you there, trust me.”

“I do.” If I didn’t, I’d already busted out the Report and tried to use it with Dylan days ago, she thought.

“Thank you.” Emily massaged her shoulder a bit. “I have to go back there and see that everything is set up. It won’t take too long.”

Jesse had to fight the urge not to put her hand over Emily’s and make her stay there. It was such a quick interaction, and she was anxious. Needy, even though she hated to admit it.

“I’ll be here,” Jesse said as Emily opened the door back to the room, and she nodded in acknowledgement, but didn’t look back.

I feel like I’m sick, Jesse whimpered in her mind.

Polaris enveloped her in a protective warmth and a notion of hope. She believed the experiment could work. Jesse clinged to it like a lifeline.

—

The glass on Dylan's cell was the same kind the Bureau used on the Panopticon, infused with Black Rock silicates that had suppressant qualities. That was a godsend in terms of practicality, for it allowed the researchers to set up their equipment in the room without having to worry about mounting an insulated facility or moving the test subject, which would've been tricky in his comatose state. 

There were a lot of antennae and tracking devices around the cell, like Dylan would suddenly start broadcasting cable tv to the whole Bureau when he was paired with the Report. That would've been an amusing thought, if Jesse wasn't a pile of nerves inside the hazmat suit. She couldn't stop looking at the box besides Dylan on the cell.

"Jesse, we're ready to start." Emily's voice snapped her to attention. They were the ones closer to the glass, and the ones who'd get a firsthand view of whatever happened inside. 

"Right." Jesse raised a hand towards the box. It floated from the makeshift pedestal it had been put on and tilted slightly to one side, then the other. She found the clasps on it and willed them open. The report fell open on the pedestal, and everyone held their breath.

Nothing happened. And then, everything did.

First, one of the measurement devices went from steady beeps to an almost uninterrupted screech too quickly for anyone to act on it. The scientist tasked with monitoring it was halfway through his warning sentence when the wave hit. A massive shockwave originated from the space between Dylan and the Report, sending everyone and everything to the floor in a violent burst. Then another. And another.

Jesse brought up a telekinetic shield made of whatever she had around, and that was the only thing that let her and Emily get to their knees.

"It's exerting too much force!" Emily shouted over the loud static.

Jesse took a glance at the cell. Nothing there was disturbed, including the glass walls. "I'm going in to cleanse it!"

"That's not a good idea!"

"Do you have any other?" 

Emily gritted her teeth, and looked from Jesse to the report and Dylan. "If you feel the resistance is too strong, come back — it might crush you."

Jesse nodded and started to crawl slowly towards the door of the cell. Without the shield, Emily was sent tumbling to the floor again, pushed away from the center, and Jesse tried to dash to her destination as an act of urgency. It wasn't as effective as she hoped, she didn't go very far, but she wasn't about to let anyone be hurt by whatever was going on there. 

Both the researchers and machinery were pushed to the walls when Jesse was finally able to open the door to the cell. She grabbed the doorframe on each side and strained hard to dash in — only to learn that everything was completely undisturbed inside, and all the strength she used flung her towards the Report and its pedestal. She crashed against it and rolled until the opposing wall stopped them.

The shockwaves stopped immediately, and the groaning researchers helped each other up among the chaos.

"Jesse!" Emily stumbled to her feet and ran to the open door, accessing the situation. Dylan was alright, there were no changes to his heart monitor. Jesse was still crumpled in a ball on the floor with the Report, and she wasn't getting up. "Jesse are you awake?! Jesse?! Guys I need a doctor here right NOW!"

—

Chapter Text

Comatose. Emily couldn't believe that was happening and yet, the data and the doctors weren't lying. How couldn't she see this coming?! She made tests with the Report and floating Hiss-afflicted agents, and nothing remotely like that ever happened. She performed all the tests she could think of, they were extensive and thorough, and yet, the Faden siblings were such an unique variant she should've taken into account that results could — would — deviate when they were involved. She felt so stupid, so small. And now Jesse was comatose. What could they do?!

As usual, Emily couldn't just take the situation for what it was. She threw herself into her work like her own life depended on it and gathered all the data she could on the newest developments: Jesse and Dylan were comatose, the Report looked inactive but emitted steady readings of an unknown nature and couldn't be moved from the floor by any amount of strength. Nothing seemed to have changed in any of the researchers hit by the previous shockwaves. She took everything she had and formed a new theory: Jesse was somehow locked inside of Dylan's version of the altered item's reality, and wouldn't be able to wake up until either it ended or Dylan woke up.

Emily wasn't making progress on a way to make any of those scenarios happen, though. She was exhausted and yet, she had trouble sleeping. Without Jesse, there was no way they'd be able to lift the Lockdown, they wouldn't have a Director, she'd lose her most esteemed friend. She couldn't let that happen. She had to find a way to reach her.

When she actually slept, it was out of exhaustion more than anything else. She fell with her face on the table and let go of a couple of files she'd been holding, spilling their contents on the floor of the Board Room. 

She saw Jesse in her dream, laying down on the bed they got her besides her brother. She saw herself going to the cell and flipping through the pages of the Report, falling asleep sitting on the floor. She saw herself falling through a spiral of refracting prisms circling around her, giving her a sense of urgency. Chimes on a windstorm. 

She got up breathless and disoriented, feeling like she was still falling. She knew what she had to do. It was crazy and could potentially get herself into a coma as well, but she had to try it.

—

The scientists monitoring the situation weren't happy when Emily showed up and demanded they open the cell for her to go save their Director. They had good intentions, they didn't want her to risk herself and end up trapped as well. She understood. She wouldn't even try if that dream hadn't urged her. In fact, something of it seemed to remain: As she stepped closer to the cell, she could see swirling refractions of light inside, like a spotlight on a stage. When she opened the door, she could clearly see they framed Jesse's head like a halo, giving her the aspect of a saint in an icon. It finally clicked in Emily's head, what that was: The guiding star.

"Are you Polaris?" she asked under her breath.

In her mind appeared the image of a night sky, shifting into a textbook with a star chart, an echo of Jesse saying the name, the soothing sound of chimes. Confirmation: That was in fact Polaris.

"You’re beautiful!” Emily smiled, and she wasn’t sure Polaris — or anyone — could see her amazement under the hazmat suit, but she hoped Polaris could hear it in her voice. “Why can I see you now?”

New images flashed on her vision, and they were of herself, surprisingly. Herself on the Foundation: “You didn’t call me, no, but I could feel you needing me here…” and then a more recent scene, in the cafeteria with Jesse: “ I’d find a way to come back, trust me.”

Was her protectiveness of Jesse what made Polaris show herself to her? Emily knew what was coming next in her train of thought and she recoiled a bit from it, like this matter was a line she was consciously afraid to cross. However, she steeled herself; She was Emily Pope, and she didn't shy away from a line of reasoning, uncomfortable as it could be. She was a woman of science, for heaven's sake.

Was it her fondness for Jesse?

Polaris spun gently around Jesse's head, soft in her touch of Emily's senses. She understood her feelings. Emily could risk saying she was proud, even; like a parental figure proud of their offspring's choices. Jesse's choices, in that case?

Polaris tugged at her mind for attention. An image of the Report flashed in Emily's view.

Right, I'm sorry! I trail off easily. Do you really want me to trigger it? What will I do once I'm inside, just look for Jesse? What if I'm not in control and can't remember anything?

The response came in the form of a sentence echoing in her ears this time. It was Jesse speaking: Polaris saved us. She told us how to turn off the Slide Projector. Then, herself: The HRAs shield us from the Hiss. 

Emily paused. Do you think the Hiss are involved? No, that's not the gist of it — Are you going to shield me and tell me how to stop this?

There was a definitive affirmation in the way she pulsed in response, and it was crazy how Emily could just deduct this. Was Polaris influencing her so she'd know? It seemed probable.

" Well, no time to lose, then," Emily said out loud for the first time since the conversation began. "Let's put my field hours to test."

She gave Jesse a last look. It was so weird to see her still like that, when she was always running around. Emily shook her head, crouched and started flipping through the Report on the floor. She'd bring her back so she could run herself ragged again until they made her rest. A small smile found its way to her lips. How many times did Emily have to hunt and drag Jesse to her office so she would rest? She even had to stay inside on some occasions, to make sure Jesse wouldn’t just get up and flee through the door that sometimes materialized and led to the Hotline Chamber. She remembered one time she nodded off and woke up laying on the leather couch, warm under Jesse’s blanket. She was supposed to have felt mad because Jesse gave her the slip, but all she could do was turn to the side and bury her face in the fabric, barely aware of the fact it was Jesse who tucked her in. The whole thing still made her fuzzy inside when she thought about it now, though. And about how that blanket had Jesse’s scent...

Her vision started blurring and her limbs became heavy all of a sudden, a clear sign the item was beginning to act on her. She sat down and leaned on the black rock-infused glass, waiting. The last thing she saw before she fell asleep was Polaris spinning endlessly in her vision, a soothingly solid presence over the mist.

—

BOOM.

A thunderous explosion shook the walls, and the sound rang in her ears. Emily felt like her whole body was spinning slowly, or maybe shaking from one side to the other at random. Both, actually. She opened her eyes and immediately closed them, because it hurt like a dozen needles piercing through her optic nerves.

She took a moment. Groaned. Assessed her situation: Everything hurt. Then, light shone through her closed eyelids.

“What the— Who are you?! What are you doing here?!”

Jesse! Emily's heart raced against her ribcage. “Jesse, is that you?!” She scrambled to sit up and tried to open her eyes again, but it still hurt too much.

“How do you know my name?!”

Oh.

“I’m here looking for you, but please, first, something happened to my eyes. It’s likely the aftermath of the oniric transportation, but I can’t be sure without performing tests, and sadly I don’t know how to navigate while blinded yet. Can you help me?”

Silence. Emily shifted, using her hands to feel more of the surface she was sitting on. It wasn’t regular but it was smooth, and bended abruptly. Likely, she fell and crashed on it.

"You're a person in a hazmat suit who came out of nowhere and wrecked my generator, why the hell should I believe you?!"

That was a good point, and one Emily had an answer to on the tip of her tongue.

"Because you're Jesse Faden, you love mind-bending impossibilities, and I'm a woman from another plane of existence standing right in front of you."

Emily wasn't all that sure she was in a different plane yet, to be honest, but that imprecision could be excused by the attempt to pique Jesse's interest. She wanted so much to be able see her reaction.

Polaris swirled into her mind graciously, and showed her an image: Jesse holding a flashlight in one hand and a sledgehammer in the other, her mouth ajar as the words hit her. She clearly didn’t know what to do, and it was exactly what Emily hoped to achieve.

Thanks, Polaris. 

"Okay I'll help you, but you have to take this creepy thing off!" Jesse replied.

—

"Hey Dylan, get your ass over here and help me!" Jesse shouted as she shouldered the door to the kitchen and walked in, bringing Emily by the arm.

"Did you find out what happened?" Dylan's voice came from somewhere further away, probably another room. The fact he could be present was expected, but a shiver still ran up Emily's spine. Trauma does that sort of thing.

"Yes I did — it was fucking Slenderman!" Jesse shouted back at him, grumpy.

"Shouldn't he have taken you, then?"

"Well I'd love to see him try." She paused for emphasis, and Emily was sure she was glaring with those piercing eyes of hers. "Seriously though, get down here, I need your help!"

"Fiiine."

"You better," She mumbled to herself, absentmindedly. 

There was the sound of a faucet being turned and water hitting metal. They were near a kitchen sink, if Emily had to guess.

"Here, Slendergirl , there's a sink and running water in front of you. You should wash your eyes."

Emily reached towards the faucet and found it after a couple of tries, but when she put her hand under the water she remembered the hazmat suit. She tried reaching for the clasps on the back of it, but they weren't in a distance she could reach easily.

"Can you help me pull it down?"

A pause. "I swear to god, if a bunch of tentacles get out of this thing you are so dead. " 

"If there were tentacles coming out of me there's a good chance I'd want you to kill me, though. If they were malign, that is."

"So you're this kind of person, huh?" Emily didn't need to see to know the smug little smile on Jesse’s face.

"Tentacles were never among my favorites, actually. I find Japanese psychological terror way more interesting."

 A tug on the clasp on her back informed Emily Jesse was having some trouble figuring out how to unhook them, which was completely understandable. They were made so for safety.

"This thing is a bitch." 

"Try pushing it forward, then unclasping."

"What the hell?! Who is this?!"

It was Dylan's voice. Apparently he finally arrived at the kitchen.

"The cause of the blackout." Jesse answered, unbothered by his surprise. Click , the clasps were open. Next, she dragged the zipper down. "Jesus, woman! There's smoke coming out of you!"

"Smoke?" Emily immediately perked up and started trying to wriggle out of the suit. That smoke could be the unknown agent acting on her eyes, yes, but it could also be a lot of other things. Unknown things. She'd better not stay in its range. "Which color is it? Does it cause any reaction in you? Back away immediately if it does!"

"It has a weird multicolor glint to it— aw fuck it hurts the eyes!" Jesse grunted in pain.

"Get away from there, you idiot, she already told you!" Dylan shouted.

Jesse didn't even argue, the sound of shuffling and cursing was enough for Emily to know she must be getting some distance.

"Go wash your eyes on the bathroom, I'll watch the woman." Dylan told Jesse in a worried tone.

Emily busied herself with getting her whole torso out of the suit, and as soon as her hands were free she reached for the running water and started washing her eyes. 

"Am I still surrounded by smoke?" She asked.

"You're not 'surrounded', it's literally coming out of you, like you were fried by lightning."

"Really? Fascinating!" She paused washing her eyes to talk, it was difficult otherwise. "It could indeed be the case that I was hit by energy resulting from the friction of planes as I was sent through them, it would explain the unusual sheen…"

"What." Dylan sounded very confused.

"I can very well have been hit by interplanar lightning!"

"Why do you sound so cheerful about it?!"

"It's a prerequisite for my job, I'm afraid." Emily chuckled and continued washing her eyes.

"And what are you, an electrician?"

She stopped again. "I'm a physicist, actually. Specialized in interdimensional interactions and correlations, but in my line of work you end up learning things from every other field of science as well." She smiled, and hoped it looked as enchanting as she intended, just to flex a bit. People tended to assume she had a trivial job and looked down on her for it: A secretary, a promoter, someone who's there to be pretty. She definitely was more than that; those looks were just a nice bonus to her scientific competence and smarts. "And what about you?"

"I'm not telling you, I don't even know where you came from!"

Emily would've rolled her eyes very hard if they were open. In fact, she risked it: her eyes burned fairly uncomfortably, but it was bearable at least. The room was lit only by Dylan's big flashlight, and it was a blessing in disguise, with how sensitive to light she was at the moment. 

Speaking of Dylan, he looked shockingly unlike the guy in a coma back at Emily's own reality: Here, he had a thicker, well-trimmed beard with short hair which, like Jesse's, had soft curls to it, and the most glaring difference of all, he looked like a serious, cautious, slightly curious person. Common in every way and attractive, based on the current beauty standards. And then Jesse walked in, her hair loose and longer than Emily had seen it before, a crooked smile to her face that made Emily's heart skip a beat. Damn, she was beautiful, and Emily couldn’t help but stare.

"He's an accountant, and boring as fuck." She laughed.

"Well thank you sister!" Dylan glared at her. "If she's with some crazy secret government agency here to kidnap us she'll know I'm an accountant now!"

Emily's eyebrows shot up by his choice of words. Did he have any clue how close to reality he got? Maybe not this specific reality, she guessed, but still — maybe he was unconsciously citing facts from other instances of him. Synchronicity was truly a fascinating thing.

"If she was one of those she'd definitely already know that." Jesse pointed out.

"That's true." Emily nodded. "But don't worry Dylan, I'm here for your sister."

"Ha! You never get a chance with the cute ones, you nerd!" Jesse elbowed him, and he took a step to the side grunting like a child.

Emily snickered. If it was anyone else, she wouldn't have been fazed by the comment, but it was Jesse; she felt a light blush creeping to her cheeks.

"I'm not going to rescue you when you're strapped to a bed!" Dylan crossed his arms.

Jesse pat his shoulder. "Oh bro, if I have it my way I definitely won’t want you going there." She winked at him and laughed.

"Oh Jesus, Jess!" He looked away, putting a hand over his brow like he couldn't believe what he was hearing.

"Well, the tests I usually run don't involve strapping anyone anywhere, but if you ask nicely…" Emily grinned.

Polaris swirled in her view, her chimes vibrating like she was chuckling. It was nice.

"For fucks sake, you too?!" Dylan threw his hands in the air, frustrated. "Don't encourage her, she's bad enough as it is!" He grabbed his flashlight on the counter and walked out. Luckily Jesse had hers in hand.

"You love me!" Jesse shouted back as he disappeared into the other room. He groaned, she giggled, and then there was a moment of silence in the kitchen. "Well, you're not covered in smoke anymore."

Emily looked at her hands. "I suppose not."

"Good. Care to explain everything now that we're done with that?" She put her own flashlight on the counter, grabbed a chair and sat down, gesturing for Emily to do so as well.

"Of course. I'm here because I'm looking for my Jesse Faden, who touched an item capable of transporting minds through parallel dimensions, and is now in a coma at our workplace." She said in her slightly excited, friendly tone. "If my theories are right she's probably lost within another instance of her, and I may be able to have her remember herself and find her way back."

Jesse blinked, her brow furrowed. “And you think your Jesse is here. With me.”

“I don’t know. That would require some experimentation.”

“Like what? You’ll exorcise her from me?” Jesse smiled incredulously, but she still looked very interested in the conversation. “Look, I’m usually very enthusiastic about weird sci-fi stuff, but you have to admit this sounds like a Doctor Who episode, and not one of the better ones.”

“What’s your favorite episode?” Emily leaned forward.

“Midnight," Jesse answered, raising an eyebrow.

"Interesting." Emily searched the pockets of her pants and took out a notepad and pen. She started writing things down unceremoniously, squinting a bit because of the dim light. "I would've guessed you'd go for Waters of Mars or Blink."

"Oh yeah? And what's your favorite episode, miss connoisseur ?"

"I have one for every series and season, you'll have to be more specific." Emily leaned her head on a hand and smiled. "But going back to our previous discussion - would you let me try something out? It's just a series of questions."

"Like you've been doing already? Sure, as long as I get to ask you as well."

"Seems fair. I'll start: Do the words Polaris, Oldest House and Hiss mean anything to you?"

"You mean aside from what they actually mean? No. How do I know if you're really from another dimension as you said?"

"You could run some PEGT tests, which I don't think you have access to, you could check for my name online and see what comes up, I'm sure you'd find some of my papers, or maybe you could just choose to believe it." Emily shrugged.

"Search for you online, huh? You never told me your name." Jesse picked up her phone from her pocket and started fiddling with it, switching between looking at it and at Emily.

Emily let out a surprised gasp. "Where are my manners?! I'm Emily Pope, Head of Research, appointed by the only and one Director Jesse Faden." She smiled.

"Director? Me?" Jesse scoffed when Emily nodded. "I could never direct anything. Your dimension is messed up, lady!"

"I really have my doubts about that, but there is a tangible chance that you differ on this particular trait. You should know she also didn't think she was fit for the job at first, but I have evidence she's already shaping up to be the best Director we've had." Emily lost herself in thought for a moment. She remembered how it bothered Jesse to be called Director, how confused she was at first, and how she settled into her role so nicely with time. She was truly amazing. 

"Who's 'we'?"

"I don't think I can tell you. I don't have enough information to know if the place exists in this reality and its current status, so I'll just say 'we' deal with the unknown." She gave Jesse an apologetic look.

"You work at the friggin' CERN?!"

Emily blinked in confusion. "No, I don't—"

"Not you, I mean— you from here!" She turned her phone so Emily could see the screen. It showed a scientific news site, and the page was titled Newest researcher at CERN is a genius, it seems: two exciting new discoveries one month in . Below it, a photo of Emily grinning in front of the massive particles collider, looking proud and elegant in a long coat.

"That's amazing!" Emily gasped, her eyes shining in light of this unexpected development. "Congratulations me from another plane, you deserve it!"

"That's crazy. That's really crazy." Jesse brushed her hair back from her face and bit her lip. She looked conflicted and while that was understandable, it wasn't what Emily came to expect from her. She looked like she wanted to believe, but was holding herself back. "What if you’re just trying to deceive me with all this?”

"Why would I go through the trouble of putting on a Hazmat suit, falling on your generator and hurting my eyes to do that?"

"I don't know!" She threw her hands to the air just like Dylan did before and groaned in frustration. "I'm crazy for letting you into my house."

Emily stopped. This behavior wasn't like Jesse, and it didn't sound like they were different on it. She was defensive, all of a sudden. Why? "That's not it. You're not crazy at all."

Jesse fixed her eyes on her. They had the same piercing quality that Emily knew and loved, but they weren't inexplicably reflective under certain lights. Emily had a theory about that in the works that would benefit from this new bit of information.

"You're afraid because it clicks in your mind, and you don't know what to make of it."

Jesse looked away to a random point in the kitchen. Her whole body language was tense, but her eyes were distant, sad even. 

"Why do I see this swirling light around your head?" She whispered under her breath. "and when you talk it's like I know things, or I was supposed to know but I don't, and then… It doesn't make sense."

"Jesse…" Emily wanted to reach across the table and pick Jesse's hand, but it was too wide for that. 

"Who are you to me?" She whispered, strangled like the words didn't want to leave her.

Emily opened her mouth to answer but stopped - she realized her standard answer wasn't satisfactory. Sure, she was Jesse's friend and at the same time her Head of Research, but that was clearly not what Jesse was talking about. Emily couldn’t read her, but she was in pain and it made her anguished to help somehow.

That was when Polaris reappeared on her vision, gentle but definite, showing her an image: Jesse with her hands around an altered item, pushing out the infective red resonance of the Hiss. 

Do you want me to do this to her?!

Emily would normally have a million caveats about this method, beginning by the fact it disintegrated a Hiss-infected coworker when it cleansed her and almost did the same to Dylan, but Polaris' appearance was so inexplicably sure that she just knew it was how it had to be. She got up and rounded the table, stopping in front of Jesse, who clearly tensed up.

"I will try something. I just need to place my hands by your face, nothing else."

Jesse nodded shyly. Emily did as she said she would, placing each hand by the side of Jesse’s head. 

Polaris surged forward in a wave of warm energy, a blanket over Jesse. She spun around her untying every mental knot she found, which Emily perceived as a force trying to push her hands away. She kept them as steady as she could until Polaris released a last burst of energy that made her pull away. Both of them gasped in relief. Whatever had been there within Jesse was now cleansed.

"I— I saw another Jesse" was the first thing Jesse muttered, blinking furiously like something got in her eye. "She was alone in a room in weird pajamas and there was an old phone, a red one."

"A bakelite phone, per any chance?" Emily furrowed her brow.

"Yeah, that's the name! I couldn't remember."

The OOP. What's it doing there?

"You should try calling her." Jesse continued. "It really looked like she was waiting for a call."

"If that's the bakelite phone I'm familiar with, trying to do so would result in a gruesome death. No one can touch that thing except for her."

"Wait, how is a phone able to cause a 'gruesome death'?" 

Emily smiled with a hint of understanding, but also with pride. "You see, that's the kind of thing we deal with. Did you see or experience anything else? It doesn't matter how small."

“Yes.”

“Well do tell! What was it?!”

Jesse scratched the back of her neck. “You know how I was flirting with you like, ten minutes ago?”

"That was for real?” Emily blinked. “I thought we were just messing with your brother.”

Jesse paused. "Yeah no, that was real. Dylan getting pissed was just a bonus - but regardless" She took a careful step forward, bordering Emily’s personal space. “this is different.” She said in a low whisper.

Then she moved until she was inches from Emily’s face, close enough to feel her breath on her skin. She looked at her eyes, at her lips and back to her eyes, waiting for signs of rejection. There were none; Instead, Emily looked at her like she had a million things going on in her head, but above all there was a spark of curiosity, like she was eager to see where things would go, so Jesse kissed her. She pressed her lips against hers and when Emily gasped and reciprocated, she deepened the kiss. Jesse felt her relax into her touch, and it filled her with warmth and childlike joy, a buzzing sensation on her chest. She pressed their bodies together and felt Emily shiver, she let out an adorable huff that made Jesse want to kiss her more, and she wasn't going to deny herself of that. Her mind raced between acknowledging the feelings, the sensations and registering the loose awestruck thoughts floating between it all: Emily was so pretty, so smart and nice and Jesse was so, so glad she was there at last. Her beacon in the dark, her friend and the one she wanted to be around, she missed her so much…

When they parted for air, it was Emily who pulled her in for another kiss. She held Jesse by the back of her head, buried a hand into her hair and kissed her like she wouldn't get another chance. A fleeting thought passed through Jesse's mind about how crazy that whole situation was - she didn't even know Emily an hour before! - but it was lost inside the happiness she was feeling sharing this moment. It felt like she'd been craving it for months, and it came with such a strong sense of relief, because Emily had finally come to get her. She wouldn't leave her. She wouldn't give up.

Then Emily pushed her away with one hand and Jesse immediately stopped, confused.

"That's… Not good." Emily shook her head as if she was trying to dissipate the fog in it. Her heart hammered in her chest, her breathing was ragged and she could feel herself yearning for more in a way she'd never allow herself to under normal circumstances, but this was in no way normal, and she hated it. 

"I— sorry." Jesse visibly deflated. She blinked a couple of times, like she was still trying to make sense of things. "I overstepped."

She made a motion to take a step back and give Emily space, but Emily placed a hand on her face to make her stay.

"That's not it." Emily stared her dead in the eyes. "You're not the Jesse I know. I... It wouldn't be fair to any of us."

"Then what was that? Because what I just felt, the relief, the… Yearning? It was like I knew you, like I’ve been waiting for you forever." Jesse passed a hand through her hair, brushing it back. She was doing everything not to look back at Emily now. She was embarrassed.

Emily’s heart leapt in her chest. Please don't say it like that, do you know what it does to me?

She inhaled. She had to distract herself, and the best way was formulating hypotheses about what just went on. Rationalizing it would clear her mind. It would help her get her desires in check.

"That… That might've been an echo of this other Jesse you saw. We don't even know if she's my— the one from my plane." Emily tried to get into her professional demeanor again, but it was more difficult than previously anticipated. Her mind didn't want to think.

"Do you think the You from here knows of this?" Jesse gestured at them both, still very much tangled.

"I don't have a way to know that. You'd have to ask her."

"How?"

Emily bit her lip. She shouldn't interfere like this, she really shouldn’t, but she couldn’t leave this Jesse like that either. "If she's me, she still has a personal email she checks out of curiosity every few days. I'll jot it down for you. Maybe it exists and it's the same here."

Jesse nodded. "I'd like that, yeah. Uh— I think we both have to wash our faces in cold water for a moment?"

"That's a very good idea." Emily let go of Jesse, and had to stop herself short of caressing her cheek. She gave her a broken, but understanding little smile instead. 

"And maybe you could talk about your Jesse afterwards, and what makes her so special?" Jesse moved out of Emily's space and looked at her with pleading eyes, like a puppy who wants a pat. That wasn't an expression Emily was used to seeing in Jesse's face at all, and it made her pause for a moment.

"I suppose so. If we use broader terms, and you don't talk about it with anyone else."

"Deal!" Jesse smiled and walked out.

Emily waited for a moment after she was gone to let go of the breath she'd been holding.

What a mess.

Polaris appeared in her vision, and her warmth felt like a hug. Emily was thankful for it. 

You won't tell her, will you?

The spinning almost halted in her view, giving a strong sense of a negative answer before Polaris resumed her movement.

You really are very kind.

Chimes sounded like a chuckle in her ears, and Emily had the strange sensation Polaris would be saying that she knew she was, if she could talk.

—

When Jesse returned, she grabbed Emily by the hand and took her to the living room. She put the flashlight facing up on the center table, making the room dimly lit instead of completely dark. They sat down on the couch and Jesse waited for Emily to talk with the same excitement of a child in a sleepover, waiting for the horror stories to begin. It was almost ironic how a fair share of the things Emily could tell her could be placed in that category.

"We should find out if your generator was damaged and if we can repair it." Emily pointed out, looking at the flashlight. "Unless you want to stay in the dark."

"Later. Tell me about your Jesse. I want to know why you're so smitten with her." Jesse sat cross legged and put her chin on her hands. 

"I'm not—" Emily started, but Jesse raised her eyebrows at her in such a disbelieving way she had to pause and reconsider her feeble attempt at denying it. "Oh Hush."

"Have you even told her yet?" Jesse made an amused expression that made Emily want to pinch the bridge of her nose and go for a walk. She didn't, though. "I bet not. You can't even admit it to yourself."

"We had more pressing matters to tend to than my feelings, I'll have you know. Besides, she's my boss." She gave Jesse a pointed look, but Jesse only laughed.

"Office romance! How classic of you!"

"We have a very strict no-relationship policy in the… Organization."

"So you've looked it up!" Jesse grinned like she caught Emily red-handed.

Emily just furrowed her brow. "Of course, when I started in the job, like everyone else."

"Yeah, yeah, you totally missed my point." Jesse waved her off. "Go on - your Jesse."

"Right. For a start, she's very guarded. It's been very strange to see how open you are in this reality."

"I guess Dylan's right and the universe can only handle one of me at a time!" 

That was an amusing thought. Emily knew Jesse was referring to herself, but she couldn't help but think of her own Jesse and the sort of things she could pull off: bringing the Bureau back from the brink of collapse in the hands of an alien resonance lifeform, beating the hell out of extraplanar entities, single-handedly dealing with a rogue entity that decimated an entire sector, enduring Underhill… Maybe there was some truth to Jesse's words, and the universe could only handle one instance of her at a time, because she was too powerful for it.

"I'll keep that in mind if the Universe starts collapsing inexplicably on our end." Emily smiled.

"How did you two meet?" Jesse asked.

Emily paused. How much could she tell? It wasn’t like she could redact her own words after she spoke them. "An event of cataclysmic proportions had just befallen our workplace, only mine at the time. I was locked in a shelter with a few other people, and all we knew was that we felt an intense soundwave trying to drill into our brains, and suddenly our coworkers were shining red and trying to kill us. We were there for hours, it was terrifying."

Emily frowned, distant for a moment. The fact the Hiss was still there in the Oldest House and the only thing keeping it at bay were the HRAs could make anyone mad, but she wasn't all that afraid anymore. She had Jesse. With that thought comforting her, she proceeded to tell the tale of how she and others employees stood clueless inside the shelter when suddenly they heard gunshots, a fight, and then silence. Emily had a smile when she told Jesse how she called for anyone outside and Jesse Faden - just visiting! - answered the intercom. “When we opened the shelter door she was there, looking uncomfortable in our presence like she was about to be interviewed for a job, despite having just saved our hides from an unknown hostile force. I guess I fell for her a little right there, when I think about it. She was an impossibility."

When Emily finished, Jesse was looking at her intently, with a knowing smile. Emily didn’t know what that was about, but when her version of Jesse did something similar, she was about to tease her. 

"She came out of nowhere and saved you? That's some superhero badassery right there!" Jesse grinned.

"You have no idea." Emily could talk until the next morning about Jesse and she'd still have interesting facts to share. She knew she tended to ramble, though, and waited to see Jesse's reaction. She looked eager to hear more, so she continued. "She not only found a building that actively hides from unaware people, but she bound herself to a gun that kills people unworthy of holding it, became our Director and set out cleansing the place with the same resonance that made her immune to the threat in the first place."

"And I thought I was the coolest Jesse — being in a band, fixing motorcycles…" She didn't sound upset about this at all. Amused was a better word.

"I don't think there is an uncool Jesse out there," Emily half joked, half stated. Of course the possibilities were infinite and with them, the parallel universes; it was very unlikely that she'd find out the proportion of cool versus uncool Jesses out there. "And did you say you were in a band? Rock band, undoubtedly. Which instrument do you play?"

"Guitar. We're not professional or anything, it's just for fun."

Wait until I tell Jesse this, she's going to love it!

"It suits you. I bet you seize people's hearts when you play."

Jesse chuckled. "Yeah, well, only when we go out of the city to play somewhere. When you live in a small town it's very difficult to get a date, because you know everybody. Hell, if I wasn't the one fixing all the cars and machines and everything, really, I bet some of the elders would try to kick me out for being a heathen, a lesbian and a troublemaker."

Emily knew that wasn't her Jesse, but she had to fight the urge to grin like an idiot because she just said she liked women. That was very embarrassing. Focus, for God's sake!

"I never really had this problem. Big city girl and everything. Where are we, by the way?"

"The absolutely aptly-named town of Ordinary, where nothing happens." Jesse opened her arms like she was showcasing her surroundings, a sarcastic smile on her face.

Emily froze. "Ordinary? It's untouched?! What about the Slide Projector?"

"Which slide projector?" Jesse furrowed her brow. "And yeah, I'd say this city hasn't changed since the dawn of time with its boring ways. Ugh."

"Remarkable! Are you telling me you never found a slide projector in the junkyard when you were eleven?"

"No but that's very specific, did your Jesse do it?"

"Yes, yes she did. It's classified though, so I can't tell you about it. Sorry."

"Why do you tempt me then, woman?!" Jesse shook a fist in the air jokingly, then shrugged. "I'll make something up, then: it ate people. It ate everyone who entered the junkyard and then when your Jesse found it she had to beat it with a baseball bat so it would spill them back. Did I guess it right?"

Emily shook her head. She was expecting her to guess part of the story right, but that was way off. "No. Nice try, though."

"Jeeeesse!" They heard Dylan shout from somewhere further down the house. "Stop making out with the stranger and go fix the generator!"

"Well fuck you too!" Jesse replied. "Why don't you go?!"

"Because you're the mechanic!"

"And you're an ass, that's what you are!" She rolled her eyes and got up, grunting with the effort. She stretched her arms and rolled her head. It was time for business. "And we're not making out!"

"Bullshit, you're always making out with someone!"

"Oh, you're still upset about that girl from Minnesota!" She laughed. "You sore loser!" Then she turned to Emily, and said in a lower voice: "Let's go fix it, we can talk there."

—

Emily couldn't help much more than holding the flashlight up so Jesse could work unimpeded, but that wasn't a problem. She enjoyed seeing Jesse work: how she navigated through panels, modules, connections and wires, the way her hands dexterously took everything apart with practiced ease, the physical exertion… Emily wished she could just stand there by the side and watch her Jesse work, too. She'd heard from rangers more than once how mesmerizing she was in the field, and she waited with bated breath for the day she could put her training to use and trail her in one of her incursions. Live observation was key for research, and she couldn't deny that the subject being Jesse was a huge bonus.

"So, are you going to look for that red telephone to call your girlfriend?" Jesse said while she unscrewed an internal panel from the generator, casually.

"I don't think so. I don't want to risk it having the same effects it has on my reality, it would kill me."

"Then what are you going to do?"

"I'll wait for the energy to be restored or for tomorrow morning and try to gather all the available data, then I'll trace a course of action."

"Time's not an issue, then?"

That was a good point. Considering that time was passing at the same speed both there and in the Oldest House (which Emily didn't know, but was hypothesizing for the sake of the thought), waiting for the morning wouldn't be that much of a deal; Arish could take care of things for some hours. If time in the Oldest House was passing slower than in that plane, it was even less of an issue. If it was passing faster, though…

"I don't have enough data to know that." Emily pursed her lips. It was frustrating. "What I do know is that I can't work properly in the dark, so right now helping you here is the priority."

"Huh." Jesse replied. "Oh would you look at this fried little bitch here! Can you bring the light closer?"

She pointed to a location deeper down the generator and Emily positioned the flashlight in a way to maximize the light income on it: there was a heavily encased part with black burn marks on it.

"Alternator is more than dead." Jesse sighed. 

"That doesn't look like an impact problem. If my arrival somehow released an energy burst, then I'd say this might not be the only fried part, I'm afraid." Emily paused. Why are you using a generator for the house, if I might ask?"

"It's a long story. The light company swears it's not their fault, but every time they install the electric cables they malfunction within months. We have the generator as a backup."

Emily's mind engaged full paranatural research mode as she heard the explanation. "That's interesting."

"That's infuriating!" Jesse slapped the alternator lightly. "I've checked the whole light grid more than a couple of times, and there's nothing wrong with it! It must be on the electric company's end!"

Emily heard the call in her mind — the call of science could never be denied. She put the flashlight down and searched the hazmat suit pockets, taking a couple of portable instruments from them. Both resembled measurement gadgets from at least ten years before, and they'd be her trusty partners in that new challenge.

"Can I take some readings? I'm curious about this anomaly."

"Sure." Jesse shrugged and gave her some space. "But if it turns out you made this whole area radioactive it'd better give me powers or I'll kick your pretty butt!"

"That's fair." Emily turned one instrument on, adjusted it, then did the same to the second. They stood in silence, Jesse being the one to watch this time. "Hm."

" 'Hm' what?" Jesse raised an eyebrow.

"The readings I'm getting are frequencies and numbers we usually get from active alt— Oh. Shit , of course!"

Jesse just stared at her, waiting for the rest of the explanation. It didn't come; instead, she started saying the most senseless combination of words Jesse had ever heard, and it made the situation actively surreal.

Then, when the generator started vibrating and something shot out of it and into the night sky, it turned a whole new level of bizarre.

"What the fuck?!" Jesse shouted, falling on her ass and scrambling back.

"It's the Report! It was inside!" The awe was discernible in Emily's words. Her eyes were probably burning from excitement.

"No it wasn't, I would've seen it—"

As if on cue, the mysterious object expelled from the generator fell back to the floor in front of them, but instead of landing it kept hovering inches from the ground. It was indeed a report, held safely by a maroon-colored folder. 

"What the hell is this thing?!" Jesse whipped her head back to Emily, holding her screwdriver like she wanted to be ready to stab the Report if necessary.

"My ticket to Jesse." Emily was practically vibrating on her own, like her body couldn't handle the sudden energy and she was going to explode. "If it remains here after I go, don't touch it under any circumstances, okay? That's vital."

"I wouldn't want to touch it, it needs an exorcist!"

Emily would love to explain it properly, if only for a pet peeve of hers, but she had to do something first. She got her notepad and started writing furiously, aided by the flashlight, and then tore the page and extended it to Jesse. "Here, take it. It's the email I told you about. Thank you for having me here, Jesse. And thank you for the kiss."

"You're... welcome? Hope you find your Jesse and kiss her for once." Jesse grabbed the paper and smiled.

Emily blushed a bit, and used the opportunity to touch the Report and dodge a reply by literally having the world pulled away from her.

Chapter Text

Emily always thought being in theoretic nothingness would be similar to drifting aimlessly in space: dark, cold and effortless. The moment after she touched the Report she felt herself completely untethered, a sensation similar to floating in a pool, and instead of the darkness she expected, her eyes adjusted to the sight of shifting lights getting in and out of view as they overlapped each other. They swirled around her like she was going down a spiraling tunnel, but in a pleasant slow motion. It was welcoming and radiated a comfortable warmth. It was protection, and it was obviously Polaris.

Before Emily could ask her about it, though, it all vanished — she blinked and she was in the world again, looking at a cream-colored wall with a plain white door in it.

She scanned the rest of the room: it was small, had a window up near the ceiling and out of reach, a small desk with a chair and a bed where a woman in grey pajamas was sitting, staring at Emily with piercing blue eyes.

"Jesse!" Emily gasped, and immediately went to her.

"Jesse's not here now," Jesse answered in a monotone voice.

Emily halted.

"What? What do you mean?"

"She was scared. She saw the red demons coming. They wanted to hurt her — everybody — and they spoke in her mind. She hid, so I took her place."

This sounds like a dissociative episode. Has our Jesse done this before, Polaris?

The impression Polaris sent was one of uncertainty, along with the image of a completely unresponsive Jesse in her teenage years, eyes glazed over while a man shook her shoulder gently and called to her. The image made Emily's heart tighten in her chest.

She suffered so much.

Polaris agreed.

"Where's she now?" Emily tried to sound as friendly as she could, she even put on an understanding smile. "Could I talk to her?"

"She doesn't want to come. Polaris is soothing her" Was all the not-Jesse said.

Polaris shimmered like she was surprised by that. Not-Jesse's eyes twitched like she could see this manifestation, and her lips curled up in a small smile.

"Hi. You're there too? Jesse will like to know. She always thought it was just her and Dylan."

Polaris expanded outwards as an energy field, a presence strong enough to be felt as static on the skin and prismatic lights in the air around Emily. The same rotating prisms appeared around Jesse's head and pulsed towards Emily's field, and when both met, a wave of their combined energy pushed everything away from them. Images flashed on Emily's vision and mingled with reality, too quickly to make sense of. It startled her and gave her an acute headache, like her brain couldn't handle that much information.

It… hurts! Please!

Everything stopped. Emily gasped and found purchase in the first thing she could see — which was the chair in front of the desk — and let herself slip to the floor safely. Her knees were far too weak to keep standing.

She closed her eyes and tried to breathe. It turned out doing that seemed to enhance her perception of the pain, and she let out a painful whimper. 

"She's sorry," Not-Jesse said casually, as if nothing happened. "She's not used to a normal human. Sometimes she forgets you're not built to withstand some of the things Jesse can."

If Emily wasn't fighting a big urge to puke on the carpet, she'd have voiced at least ten different questions raised by this statement, starting by what did she mean by ‘normal’ human and what made Jesse different. She had theories on those fronts, of course, but it was always best to confirm with the main sources.

Polaris was worried in her mind, the prisms were agitated.

Just give me a second.

She seemed to comply.

Not-Jesse kept talking in her monotone voice, unfazed by the scene. "So you're not from here, huh? You come looking for Jesse, but not this one. We've seen her. She passed by, went further in the dreams of others. She's hurting so bad for her brother."

Emily looked up, eyes wide. She might not know what was going on with this person within Jesse, but this was valuable information about her own mission. 

"Is she safe?" Emily tried to ask, but she had to clench her teeth quickly after because bile filled her mouth.

"That I don't know."

The door behind Emily was kicked open. Emily turned so fast her head spun and she tilted dangerously towards the floor. If she wasn't already sitting, she would've fallen for sure.

"Put your hands in the air right now!" a security officer shouted, training a pistol at Emily.

Oh for fucks sake.

Emily turned to the side and vomited.

—

It felt like forever between being carried to the medical wing and actually feeling better, but Emily had endured worse before. On a positive note, she drew some satisfaction from the fact the guy standing watch was the one who first found her, and he looked miserable at the endless wait. He tried to question her as soon as the doctor started taking care of her, and as a result was shunned and forbidden from doing so before Emily was back to an acceptable state. Emily couldn't really make out the terms the doctor used to describe her condition, but that told her it was serious by itself; Emily had acquired a lot of knowledge on medical lingo through her mother, and if she couldn’t make sense out of it, it was probably because there was some serious confusion going on in her mind.

Emily wondered briefly what she'd think of her right now, her mother: feeling unwell at a psychiatric ward in a parallel plane with a guard keeping watch over her. She wouldn't even believe it, for a start. Emily could almost hear the scorn in her words.

Polaris spun in her vision, curious about that thought, and at the same time worried about her. Emily sighed, then looked up at the ceiling.

I'll be fine. I always think of her when something bad is happening, because she's the worst. It’s natural.

Polaris turned slowly, the sound of chimes was sparse. Was she sad for her?

"She's in the past. I have to get better now so I can get out of here and find Jesse."

An encouraging warmth washed over her. Polaris was so nice, it made her lips curl up in a smile. Emily wished she could hug her somehow, someday. Maybe she could build a simulacrum for her so they could do it safely in this three-dimensional reality. She didn’t really fancy the idea of pulling a Darling and ascending to a resonant existence, she still had way too much she wanted to do in this one.

Would you like to come here and spend some quality time with us in a physical experience?

Polaris recoiled a bit, not frightened, but thoughtful. Then the chimes played like laughter in Emily’s ears, the fractals shimmering in a chaotic yet pleasant way.

What? Emily frowned. What’s funny?

The image Polaris showed her in her mind’s eye was one of a couple laying on a bed, spooning each other. Emily felt her face burning almost immediately.

That’s not what I— Why did you even think that in the first place?! I didn’t think resonance-based lifeforms even had concepts like that, but clearly I was wrong!

Polaris was still chuckling when she showed her a new scene: it was one of Jesse, clearly younger, with one of her crooked smiles. "I'm definitely a bad influence," she said.

Emily groaned. 

"Are you finally feeling better?" the guard asked from the side, carrying all the annoyance in the world in his tone. "Can I please do my job?" This last part wasn't directed at Emily, but at the doctor distracted with some paperwork in a desk nearby. 

"I told you—"

"This woman was inside a patient's room, goddammit! That's serious!" He turned back to stare daggers at Emily. "How did you get there?! What did you want to accomplish?!"

Fuck. What could she say? Both of those things involved paranatural concepts he certainly wouldn't believe in and she couldn't disclose.

Emily inhaled, held her breath, exhaled and spoke afterwards. "That's all classified." 

The guard scoffed. "And who are you to say that, CIA?"

She searched her pockets. She left the Hazmat suit in the previous plane, but she always kept her ID attached and safe with her. There it was, in her shirt's pocket.

"FBC. Emily Pope, Researcher." She flashed the ID to the man and raised a defiant eyebrow, silently daring him to question the veracity of it. His jaw visibly dropped.

"That's not a real thing!" He babbled a bit, confused, then got up from his chair in an angry fit. The doctor got up from his desk as well.

"Now, now, there's no need for raising tensions—"

"You can call the Bureau if you want, talk to the Head of Operations. She can confirm my status." Emily's tone was unfazed and sharp as a sterilized knife. She had to deal with men questioning her status and competence her whole life, so this was nothing in her book.

The guard took his radio and called into it, keeping eye contact all the while. "Boss, do you copy? This is Müller."

A buzzing sound and a voice full of static came from the other side. It made Emily's head hurt again. "Yes I'm here, Müller, what's the deal? Any problems with the intruder?"

"Yes sir, she's saying she's a Fed, showed me a badge and everything. Works at a FBC place. Have you ever heard of it?"

A pause. Everyone waited on it. "FBC?" The voice sounded more serious, cautious.

"Yes sir, that's what she said."

"Shit. What's her name?"

"Emily something—"

"Pope," Emily interjected.

"Emily Pope, from Research." He almost spat the last word, and Emily rolled her eyes. Of course he would.

The boss, on the other side, started talking again."Listen Müller, I have to make a call. I'll get back to you on it. Don't do anything stupid, just watch her. We don't need more trouble."

The guard pursed his lips, clearly unsatisfied by how the conversation went. Emily remained impassive, but inside she quite enjoyed the power trip being from a secret government agency brought her.

"Right, so now even Mr. Gillian told you to hold, can you please leave the poor woman alone? She needs rest!" They both seemed to have forgotten the doctor was still there, because both whipped to face him with looks of surprise.

Müller grumbled something in frustration, nodded and sat back in his chair. Emily let herself relax into her pillow again, basking in her win for no more than a moment before her mind started working again.

By the way this Gillian reacted at the mention of the FBC, he recognized it. If he did, that meant the Bureau had current and/or past business in this particular psychiatric ward, and Emily didn't have to think too far to conclude it had to do with Jesse. Did they put her there or were they only monitoring her? Did it differ from the events in her timeline? The possibilities were endless, she couldn't account for all of them. She had to see as she went.

No more than twenty minutes passed before a security guard entered the medical wing with purpose, and Müller the Guard got up in a hurry. Emily looked from one to the other, eyebrows raised.

"Miss Emily Pope?" the man called, looking a bit wary.

"That would be me, Dr. Pope." Emily didn't emphasize the title, but kept it there as a reminder of her status. 

"I'm sorry we gave you trouble. Your visit wasn't scheduled, Müller here was only doing his job." He nodded towards the guard. His voice carried a lot of anxiety, he clearly aimed to please her. Did he think she could pull the strings to fire him?

"I know, I don't hold it against any of you. My visit happened under truly unique circumstances, I assure you it won't happen without previous notice again." Emily gave him a sympathetic smile.

"There's something else, ma'am: A Dr. Darling wants to talk to you. I left the line on hold."

Darling? So this must be some time before the Hiss. If they are even a thing that happens here at some point, Emily thought. "Of course. Can you take me to it?"

—

"Hello, Dr. Darling?"

"Emily? Oh hi! I was wondering why you didn't come today, that was really not like you—"

"Sir, I believe we should present our ID codes now, for safety." Emily had been so used to interrupting Darling with important details when he started rambling that the habit kicked back in effortlessly, like it never left.

"Yes, yes, I was getting to that!" He chuckled.

It took a couple of minutes of going back and forth with cyphers, but at last they were both sure the person on the other side of the line was who they said they were. It was so weird for Emily to confirm she was hearing Dr. Darling after his supposed ascension to a different plane of existence. She couldn't pinpoint if she was unsettled, affectionate or surprised, maybe all of those.

Unaware of Emily's inner workings, Darling kept talking. "Now that this is out of the way, please tell me: what are you doing there of all places, Emily? You’re miles away from the Bureau!"

Should she lie? No. If anyone could understand the crazy yet fascinating situation she was in, it was Casper Darling. Maybe he could help, even.

"Sir, you'd better sit down for this."

—

"That is incredible! Reality-hopping through an AI!" She could almost see the smile on Darling's face by the way he talked. It would be that childish yet cute smile, the one he had whenever they made an unexpected discovery. Back then she'd roll her eyes and keep on working, but now the memories left a bittersweet smile on her lips. Despite everything that happened and that he had a lot of responsibility for, despite the frustration and sadness and rage, she missed him. "And you said you found this Report again inside the generator?"

"Yes, it was concealed there. I believe it might display the same behavior throughout realities and conceal itself on mundane items again."

"I agree." He paused. "Aren't you concerned you may be taking an entirely different route than the coworker you're pursuing, given there might be endless iterations of parallel realities out there?"

That was a very pertinent question that Emily would probably have run into and had trouble with, if not for one thing. "I've taken this into account, sir. Luckily, I have a guide, and she's been drawing me towards my mark consistently so far."

Polaris spun smoothly on her view, the prisms spinning with a sense of pride. It made Emily smile for a moment.

"A guide, you said?" Darling repeated. Emily could see in her mind's eye how he would straight his glasses and lean forward in interest.

" Yes. A friend of my coworker’s. That's all I can—" Polaris spun swiftly in her view and made her stop. She was trying to get her attention, and once she got it, she sent a set of fleeting scenes to Emily's head: the Hedron inside Dimensional Research, being studied by an awestruck Darling; one of his videos, him saying he was communicating with it; and lastly, another one of his videos, when he was already breaking down, and how he said he should have told Emily more.

There was a strong sense Polaris was urging her to do something. Did she want to talk to Darling herself? Was that even possible?"

One more scene came into Emily's mind: It was one of herself after an "argument" she had with Darling, except it wasn't one — she kept trying to voice her feelings on the matter of him not trusting her around his more important work, and he kept evading and belittling it like he just needed a little more time, a little more of her patience, a little more of his own work going his way. In the scene she was in the bathroom, looking at herself in the mirror, trying to suppress the tears from falling. She remembered it well, how betrayed she felt. She kept thinking she'd be able to do so much more if he just decided to trust her, he should trust her. He was the one who recruited her, so what did he even want?!

Polaris urged her again. Was she urging Emily to… Speak of it? Of herself?

"Emily?" Darling called on the phone. "Are you still there?"

"Dr. Darling, I must tell you some things of vital importance, actually," Emily said in a quieter, more thoughtful tone than her usual bright one.

"Well shoot away, I'm all ears!" He chuckled. Of course he wasn't taking it seriously. Her free hand closed into a fist.

"First and foremost sir, with all due respect, how dare you think I'd be better off left in the dark about your more relevant research programs like a glorified secretary at your disposal?! You know I could be invaluable help. You see it everyday, but you're afraid I'll get hurt and that's a big mistake, I'm as tough as you are."

"Emily—!" 

"Second: How dare you use an item as dangerous as OOP-15, bring something back out of it and think it wouldn't bring repercussions?! Sir, that was intensely misguided on your part and yes , I know all about it, I'll leave up to your imagination why that is. Third: You had a hand in destroying two children's lives, you failed Dylan Faden in every possible way and you should correct this mistake, if the conscience I'm positive exists within you is of any value. And Jesse Faden! Were you the one responsible for throwing her in this psychiatric ward?! Are you being equally terrible to her?! That's inexcusable, sir, and I really hoped you'd be better than this. I keep being proven wrong. Last point: You should trust your version of me. You hand-picked her for a reason, let her show you."

Emily's breath was ragged like she'd run a mile after she stopped talking. Her heart was pounding against her ribcage, and even though it felt good letting all of this out, it also put her on edge. She thought it would be easier to say those things to Darling knowing she was right about them, but it still made her anxious like she was just a newly-hired junior researcher.

Everyone knew Darling was extremely sociable and didn't waste a chance to talk about anything. When Emily ceased talking, however, there was silence for a long while on his side, the only indicative he was still there being his breath on the receiver.

"I'm sorry." His words came with the breath he'd been holding, and they carried the weight of the world with them. "I'm very sorry Emily, I… I didn't want to risk you."

"Risk me?" She scoffed. "Do not patronize me, sir. You know I'm better than that."

"I know, I definitely do!" he rushed to say. "That's why it was so important, you see— you're the brightest researcher I've seen in years, and just the right type of person I believe would lead the Bureau in a great direction. I didn't want to risk getting you hurt by our unstable work in Dimensions."

That hit Emily harder than she was expecting. Hearing these words from Darling months ago would have reassured her so much... It would placate her dissatisfaction a bit, and open the door to a frank discussion. They would've been able to talk it out like adults and get to a middle ground. Now, though… It left a bitter aftertaste.

"Don't be sorry, be better." Emily suppressed a sigh. "Say these exact words to your Emily, talk to her. Listen for once. And for god's sake, Dr. Darling, don't try to evade the subject or give excuses."

Again, a moment of silence.

"I… will do that, yes." Darling's voice was a whisper, like he was trying to find his strength to answer. "Thank you, Emily."

"You're welcome." Emily felt sorry for him, but she felt more sorry for herself and what the other instances of her had to endure. It was a necessary wake-up slap. "I must go now, sir, and resume my search for my coworker. Be safe, and be well."

"You too, Emily. And…" He stopped. She waited patiently. "I… Nevermind. Good luck!"

He hung up, and Emily shook her head. It would've been too much to expect him to just say what was on his mind right now, but she'd be happy if he made good on his word and actually talked to his version of Emily. She put the receiver back on the phone and stared at it for a good moment, thoughts running amok through her mind at a dizzying pace.

She wished things had been different in her own reality, but she didn't have a way to know what she did right now. She couldn't change her own past, but if she could help the future of other parallel planes, then she'd risk doing so.

Polaris swirled in her vision with the gentle sound of chimes and a sensation of comfort radiating with her. Emily felt it enveloping her senses and let out the breath she'd been holding, and with it, the heaviness in her chest.

“Good, you finished.”

Emily whipped her head back to see Jesse — or rather, Not-Jesse judging from her expression — on the corner of the security room, staring at her blankly. There was no way she could’ve gotten there without Emily noticing.

“How did you get here?!” Emily placed a hand over her heart. It seemed to want to escape through her ribcage.

“I walked,” Not-Jesse deadpanned.

“Right, but did you come through the door, or—”

“He called. He’s waiting to talk to you.”

Emily frowned. “Who, Darling? We were talking just now…”

“No, not Scienceman. God.” Not-Jesse smirked.

“God, really?” Emily’s frown deepened, but she smiled this time. “Well if he’s out there, I suppose I do have a couple of words I want to share about His creation... ” 

—

The guard outside of the room was very confused and definitely unsettled when Not-Jesse  walked out of the room with Emily. As suspected, she hadn’t entered through the door; he’d been there guarding it the whole time and didn’t see her, not even in the corridor. When they were out of earshot, Emily tried again to inquire about it, but all she got was a tilt of Not-Jesse’s head and a reaffirmation that she did it by walking.

They were back at the room where Emily first arrived, and on the side table, there was a phone with its receiver lying next to it. A red bakelite with a white knob replacing the dial. Emily was sure it wasn’t there before, and that it was an equal to the bakelite in the Bureau in every sense, except for the inverted color on the knob. What could this mean? If in the oldest house, the Hotline connected the Director to the Board — a black inverted pyramid in the astral plane — then rationally, this one had to connect to a white upright pyramid… Somewhere. If one took duality in stride, then it would be in the physical realm, but was that how it even worked? Emily knew that logic like this more often than not didn’t apply to the sort of things she studied, but—

“Don’t keep him waiting. It’s rude,” Not-Jesse said, giving her an appraising look.

“Are you sure it’s safe?” Emily replied, looking from her to the phone. “We have a phone like this where I come from and it—”

“He told me you might say something like that. He said it’s not like that rat trap, or anything equally murderous.”

Well, that’s a little bit reassuring coming from God, right? Emily thought.

Polaris spun like she was confused, but expanded on her vision like she wanted to know more. Emily gave Not-Jesse a last look and went to grab the receiver. She took it to her ear in one go, so she wouldn’t lose the courage.

“Hello?” she tried, and braced for anything trying to drill into her mind, implode her, or even spike her blood pressure in a way her circulatory system would be obliterated.

Instead, what she got was the voice of an old man chucking fondly on the other side of the line. “Jo alkaa Lyyti kirjoittaa! The scientist is here, ah!”

What? Emily furrowed her brow. He certainly had a thick foreign accent — European? — but she couldn’t identify what language he was speaking.

Polaris spun rapidly in her vision, as if startled. She took Emily’s vision for a moment, showing her the sight of an old man in a jumpsuit. Emily had never seen him before.

“Don’t be amazed as a common cuckoo, girl, I will explain. Very easy, but you need to hear it!”

Well, that was a good thing, right? “Who am I talking to? N-not that I doubt you, that’s not it, but—”

“You’re looking for my assistant but she doesn’t want to be found, see? She is deep into the horse's spruce tree, very blinded. It is not something you can solve with your science and your wits! Family matter. But to see you is good thing, does her good.”

“So you’re telling me Jesse wants to see me but doesn’t want to be found, and that's not something I can solve through science. Is that right?” Emily tried.

“You are going to be running in circles with your fancy paper, yes!”

"So how can I find her?"

"By making her see you in her heart!" For some reason Emily could almost see that old man Polaris showed her doing a dramatic motion with his hands to complement the words. "You have your shining friend in you, and it is in her, and it is also in the others like her. You have to reach out, eh?"

Emily had a grimace of deep concentration that looked very much like she was consternated with something, but frying her brain at the same time. "Right. I think I understand what you mean."

"You are clever, you're going to figure it out. Now I have to go back to my ——-, okay? Nice talking to you."

"Uh— same, mister…"

The soft beeping on the line told her he hung up. Emily stared at nothing, phone still held against her ear. Her mind was working at 220% with all this new information, instead of the usual 110%. It was fascinating; God was a man who spoke in very odd idioms! That explained why people misinterpreted him so much, Emily thought. 

She wasn't really taking that train of thought seriously, of course, but it was an amusing joke.

"Your… Your nose is bleeding."

Emily had forgotten Not-Jesse was still there, but she thought it wise to deal with the supposed bleeding first. She placed two fingers above her lips and found they came back covered in blood, so she immediately searched for handkerchiefs or napkins in her pocket and found a piece of cloth with the FBC logo on it that she didn't really know the purpose of, but would serve her just right at the moment. 

"Thank you, I didn't notice." Emily turned to face Not-Jesse as she held the cloth against her nostril, and found that her companion's whole body language changed drastically: instead of the stiffness and the blank stares she'd seen so far, the Jesse in front of her now actively cowered in the corner, and even though she had a curious glint in her eyes towards Emily, she also had the look of a frightened doe. There was no way that was the same person as before. "Oh hello there. Have we met?"

"I'm Jesse." She said quietly. "Dylan told me it was okay to come back…"

Wait, Dylan? Does she mean the person we were talking to was Dylan?!

Polaris' crystals didn't expand or speed up like before, so she probably wasn't surprised. In fact, it felt a lot like she was nodding, despite her distinct lack of a head. Emily was mortified.

Why didn't you tell me?!

Now she was shrugging. How could a resonance-based convey the idea of shrugging so well?! It was definitely Jesse's fault; she'd been in her head too long! 

Jesse chuckled like she could hear the mental conversation, but it was quick and muted, almost imperceptible on her part. Emily only noticed it because of her excellent eye for detail, and as soon as she turned her attention to Jesse, she looked away to the floor.

"Dylan said you had Polaris as well and I wanted to see it." Jesse said almost apologetically. The Polaris in Emily's head expanded like it did before, a wave of power prickling her skin, and enveloped Jesse. She opened a big, almost childlike smile, and her eyes darted up to watch the prismatic light all around her. "Hi! I can feel you so clearly right now!"

Emily could feel the deep affection Polaris had towards Jesse, it was almost maternal, or maybe similar to a sibling bond or a deep friendship. It was soothing and exciting at the same time, like people finally meeting after a long, anxious wait. Emily almost felt like an intruder on their moment, but Polaris noticed it and extended the extraphysical hug to her as well.

You really are the best, Polaris, she thought.

She is! Jesse's voice echoed inside Emily’s mind, and she gave her a surprised glance. Jesse was still smiling. Yes, we can talk like this, I do it with Dylan all the time!

"Oh wow, that's useful," Emily actually said this time. "But why didn't it hurt? Before, when Polaris reached out to Dylan, it hurt me so bad mentally, there was too much in my head…"

"I don't know. Polaris probably does."

Polaris spun softly in the space all around her, not affirming or denying. Instead, she showed Emily an image of her with each hand on the side of Jesse's head, cleansing her mind in the previous parallel reality she's been to. Did she want Emily to do it again?

Jesse took a step forward. "I think Polaris wants you to do something with me." 

"Yes, she sent me an image. Let me just…" Emily raised her hands slowly, placed them on each side of Jesse's head, and when she saw how she suppressed a whimper, she added "I won't hurt you, I promise."

Polaris seemed to double down on that affirmation, which made Jesse relax a little. Then the cleansing began: Polaris spun faster around them, and Emily felt her energy coursing through her fingers and into Jesse like the vibration of a high-pitched song in her senses. It didn't hit any sort of resistance this time, on the contrary: It was welcomed in, assimilated, and for a second everything was endless, peaceful, resonant — everything revolving around Jesse. The light in her eyes glinted like Polaris in motion, and Emily finally realized that was the reason behind her strangely refractive eyes, even in her own reality. She smiled, remembering how many times she’d catch herself staring at them, that mystery pulling her in as much as the things she’d study in the Bureau, things she could get lost in forever… And in the depths of her longing, she felt something reacting. Responding. 

Surprise, followed by acknowledgement. In the same way she could understand Polaris’ intents in her head, she heard a single word whispered without sound, yet in an unmistakable voice: Emily?

Jesse was calling her name.

The resonance around them burst outwards and faded, Polaris’ fractals glistening for a second more like twinkling stars. Both Jesse and Emily gasped, taking steps back to withstand the force. 

“Wow. I— wow.” Emily blinked a couple of times, trying to make sense of what just happened. Then Jesse came and enveloped her in a bear hug, and Emily remembered that Jesse was taller than her; the cowering made her smaller.

“You’re here! You’re… You must come!” Jesse half said, half laughed, like she was having a great time. It was very odd.

“Where?” Emily put her arms around her waist gently.

There was no answer. Instead, she felt Jesse loosen her grip on her and step away from the hug, looking very confused and very flustered as well. Even the tip of her ears were red.

“I… She misses you.” Jesse didn’t know where to put her hands, or where to look. 

“I miss her too,” Emily replied softly. “I need to go after her.”

A glint on the side of her vision caught her attention, and she found herself staring in the direction of the phone again — except this time it wasn’t a phone, but a leather folder with the FBC logo engraved on it. 

“Go before they come check on us,” Jesse said.

Emily nodded. She was already on her way to picking it up. “Thanks, Jesse. Thank Dylan for me as well.”

“Hope you can come visit sometime.” Jesse smiled.

Emily smiled, but she didn't have the heart to tell her she didn't think the Report would bring her back here anytime. She opened the folder and leafed through the pages hastily, and she could hear the knob on the door turning when that reality was taken away.

—

Chapter Text

Emily blinked, and blinked again trying to adjust her eyes to the darkened place she was in. She took stock of what she knew immediately: she was laying down on the floor, the only hint of light came from somewhere behind her, and she felt very sick again. Maybe it was a recurrent effect of hopping from one reality to another? It wouldn't be surprising. She took a deep breath and exhaled, trying to center herself. A quick break first, then going after Jesse. There was no way she'd be able to work properly with her head spinning as it was.

Polaris definitely agreed, judging by the soothing way her prisms rotated. The far sound of chimes was relaxing in Emily's ears, she kinda wanted to curl up and sleep on that spot, but that might be dangerous, considering the unknown nature of the report's interactions with parallel realities. Who knew what would happen if she slept there? With the Report's altered effect being triggered passively by dreaming, maybe she would be transported somewhere else. Maybe that wasn't a good thing. She'd rather not find out.

After a while, Emily tried to sit up. She learned two things: her hands were tied by something seemingly incorporeal, a force that didn't hurt her, but kept her hands bound together in front of her torso, and her ribs hurt a lot when she moved them. She was definitely hurt there. She learned one more thing just then: she gasped, reacting at the pain, but no sound came out. She tried talking after that, a couple of simple words, but again no sound came out of her mouth.

What the fuck?! Emily thought.

Polaris spun outwards sharply, she seemed to share the sentiment.

I hate to be a bother, but can you do something about this?  

Polaris spinning slowed considerably, she was considering the question. Then she expanded outwards like before, a tangible force centered on Emily this time. It didn't take long for the energy and lights to dissipate, though — and Polaris was definitely frustrated.

Don't feel bad, it was just a possibility. I'll find a way to break free as soon as I can see what's going on.

Emily tried to give her a sense of support similar to what she usually did to her; it was the least she could do. Next thing, she turned to see where the faint light was coming from, and noticed a narrow window high up on the wall, out of reach. It was gated, to top it off.

Am I in a cell? Why?

Polaris didn't answer her, but instead moved to encircle something she couldn't really parse in the corner of the cell. That was where Emily headed, walking on her knees and trying not to move too much not to upset her injured ribs or whatever was going on there.

She tilted forward and used her bound hands to examine the place Polaris showed her, and in the middle of all the rough pieces and bits of rock, she found something weirdly polished. A pebble, maybe? She closed her hand around it, it lit up and illuminated the room like a beacon of bright bluish light. Emily gasped again, but she was still muted.

With some light to aid her vision, it was much easier to make sense of her situation. She was indeed in a cell, but one that looked straight out of a medieval dungeon, if the heavy wood-and-metal door and the thick stone bricks were any indication. The light also revealed that there was something painted on her arms, right at the wrists. It was a series of symbols unknown to her, and upon closer inspection, it didn't look so much like paint but burn marks on her skin, like someone branded her.

It looked an awful lot like a magic enchantment, if Emily was honest.

Fuck. Are we in a tabletop rpg alternate reality or something? 

She rolled her eyes, scoffing mentally at the notion. Even magic in a traditional sense had to have systems in place to work properly. It was as much a science as any other, in the fantasy world's context; she just had to figure out the rules, apply the methods and if that didn't work, get creative with her solutions. Now, if she inspected those symbols on her wrist a bit closer…

Polaris tugged at her mind, making her turn her attention back to the place where she got the shining stone. There was a small piece of paper tucked between the floor tiles there. Emily struggled to take it out of its hiding place, certainly ruined her nails trying to pinch it out, but finally got it after a few tries. She took the light closer to it and found another set of unknown symbols marked in an odd, hexagonal pattern on the paper, this time with ink. She didn't know what they meant, but something happened as she focused her attention on them: the borders lit up with a green glow that burned from the borders inwards, like fluorescent moss. It was beautiful. Before Emily knew, the paper faded from view, and what she saw in the empty space it left was a whole new scene. It expanded and expanded until it was the size of a window, and it spilled such a blinding red light into the cell, it made Emily instinctively recoil and try to protect herself from the Hiss. 

What was in that window obviously wasn't it, but it was a grim reminder of the presence in the Oldest House, and why Emily's mission was so important. She had to find Jesse and take her back. They couldn't leave the Hiss roaming around.

The light dimmed to the point it was possible to see the other side, and Emily would've gasped hard if she had a voice to do it.

There were people there, on the other side. Five prominent figures with arms outstretched, palms pointed up, dressed in dark leather clothes. They stood in a circular pattern. There were many others, too, further away, obscured from clear view and blurred. Emily didn't know if that was an effect of the spell — spell? She should come up with better terminology when she had the chance — or not. The most important piece of this puzzle was in the center of the circle: a woman sat on her knees, doubled over, clutching her sides. She was naked; her body bore obvious bruises, but apart from those, it had lights and dots traced all over it in glowing patterns. They were stars, Emily realized. Constellations.

That was when the woman raised her head slightly, her red hair a tangled, wet mess, but enough for Emily to identify her. It was Jesse. Of course it was Jesse. She instinctively took a second look at the people in the circle and recognized some, with a shock: Tommasi was there. Trench and Lin Salvador as well. The other two could only be the rest of the department heads, Dr. Darling and Marshall. What were they doing?! Red tendrils of energy rose from the circle — magic circle? Ritual? — and danced in the air before trying to attach themselves to Jesse. When they got close they disintegrated, but it clearly hurt her. Why were they hurting her?! Why did they look so possessed, like Hiss had to— 

Oh. Oh fuck.

Emily reached forward instinctively, she had to do something, she had to save Jesse! In her haste she dropped the light stone, and it turned off as soon as it hit the ground. The room was once more engulfed in darkness, the red lights from the vision — illusion? Spell? — became too bright and made Emily blink and look away. When she opened her eyes, she was in a completely different place: The FBC entrance lobby, with an arm outstretched towards the glass doors.

She lowered her hand slowly. New York was vibrant and frantic beyond those doors, cars were stuck in traffic, pedestrians walked from one side to the other without even glancing in the Bureau's direction, as it was customary. Emily's chest tightened at the sight of the city so close, yet so far. It had been so long since she had last seen the outside world, and she still had no idea when the lockdown would be lifted and she'd be able to step outside. Emily was never one to mind staying long periods of time in the House, but even she longed for her suboptimal apartment, for curling up on the couch late at night with a cup of hot tea and watching silly shows on TV, for the comfort of her bed. If she stepped outside right now could she just go, just like that? She was so tempted to try…

Before she could take one step, however, she caught movement on the corner of her eye and turned in time to see a redhead walking past her, her shoulders hunched like she was about to go shoot down a bunch of Hiss, her outfit the same jacket and jeans she was wearing when they first met, all those days ago.

"Jesse!" Emily called out, turning further toward her.

Jesse stopped and whipped her head back, eyes wide and alarmed. She looked at Emily for a long moment, confusion clear in the way she scanned her up and down with her eyes, trying to parse her  "Do I know you?" 

"I know you." Emily raised her eyebrows for emphasis in the quirky way she sometimes used with Jesse when they were thinking of doing some digging in all the stuff Darling kept from her — something important, yet private. Jesse tensed up, and panic flashed through her expression for a second before morphing into resolve. She was ready to clock Emily, if the need rose, so Emily scrambled to clarify things on her end. "It's not a threat I swear, I'm on your side!"

"How do you know me?" Jesse shot back. She had her lips tight as a line, her fists prepared. Emily didn't know how she could begin to explain how they knew each other in that situation. It could have consequences this time, unlike with the first Jesse she met in these alternate realities: If this was the first time Jesse arrived in the House, as it seemed to be, telling her would mean giving her information she wasn't supposed to know yet and messing with major events in that specific reality. She didn't even know which differences it had from her native one yet!

That was when Polaris surged forward, spinning in the air around Emily like a protective aura. Jesse's expression changed immediately, something between awe and disbelief. She took a step forward and raised a hand, vainly trying to touch the lights.

"Polaris?" She whispered softly. 

The telltale prisms appeared spinning around her as well, and soon there was no difference to where Emily's version of Polaris started and where Jesse's did. In that moment, everything else faded from view, and they saw themselves inside the vortex of endless crystals that comprehended their perception of Polaris. They could see each other reflected endlessly, similar but unique in their own ways, each of the impressions bearing their own happiness and pain, their own history. Was that how Polaris saw them?

Polaris didn't answer Emily's mental inquiry, but she did react to her and directed her gaze towards a particular impression of Jesse hidden in a darker corner. Her image was almost faded, but Emily could see she was sitting on a thrashed car, smiling at something. 

Is this her? Emily asked.

She knew the answer to her question even before Polaris answered. Then,Jesse turned to look at her, and they locked eyes with each other. They saw each other clearly that instant, despite whatever distance and obscurity might be between them before. Emily's chest tightened with the smile Jesse opened for her, timid but hopeful, and the way she tried to reach for her… But like a cloud blocking the sun, the sight of her disappeared from view, followed by the prisms. Emily felt a heavy sensation in the back of her mind that wasn't hers, and with it came a shy notion of an apology. 

It's not a problem. Are you okay? She asked. First things first - she wouldn't want to overexert her guide/friend.

The gentle but slow way Polaris spun on her vision, it was a definite affirmation, if a tired one.

"How did you meet Polaris?" The current Jesse had something close to reverence in her expression. She'd probably been watching the whole exchange, including the sight of the other her, and thought it was awesome. 

Emily's first impulse was to tell her she was the one responsible for her meeting Polaris, but that would be deeply troublesome if one considered that not only this Jesse didn't know her, but they were also standing at the entrance to the FBC. That conversation would definitely lead to classified topics, and Emily didn't want to be called out for disclosing information like that with that many people as witnesses.

"She's helping me find a friend," she ended up saying. "And you're here for the first time, right?"

Jesse bit her lip, her eyes darted to the guards at each side of the door. That would've been answer enough for Emily, but she still nodded for extra clarity.

"Looking for Dylan?"

Now Jesse really looked surprised. She could've pierced Emily with her eyes with how intensely — and anxiously — she stared

"Do you know him?! Is he really here?! Is he okay , what—"

"Jesse, wait. I don't think I can give you those answers." Jesse was about to protest when Emily cut her off. "But I know who can, and I'll make them talk."

Emily walked toward the front desk with long steps, putting on a confident smile when she saw the receptionist.

"Good afternoon, Dr. Pope." She nodded in acknowledgement, and tilted her head slightly to take a better look at Jesse. She must've been keeping an eye on her since she came through the door, if Emily had to guess.

"Good afternoon, Miss Robinson. Could you call Dr. Darling for me? This is a very special guest and I need to talk to him about her, you know how it is."

"Sure, one moment." Miss Robinson dialed a number and waited on the line. Emily made a mental note: This was a reality where Darling was still around, so things were probably okay inside the Bureau so far — good. It took a long moment for someone to answer the phone, and when they did, a quick exchange of words followed. She put the receiver back. "It seems like he's not in his office, Dr. Pope. From what I gathered, a lot of people are looking for him right now."

"Hm." Emily took a hand to her chin, thinking. It wasn't uncommon for Darling to vanish into one of his numerous labs and leave people looking for him. Still… "What is the date today, miss Robinson?"

"Uhhh..." Miss Robinson turned to her desk calendar, ran a finger through it. "October 29th."

Emily felt her whole body go cold.

"What time is it?!" she rushed to ask.

Miss Robinson frowned. "A quarter to three?"

" Fuck, we got one hour until… Let me talk to Marshall, please!"

Miss Robinson clearly thought there was something wrong with Emily by the grimace she let slip, but she complied. 

Jesse approached and touched Emily's hand lightly to draw her attention.

"What's going on?" she asked in a low tone, searching Emily's expression.

"Hopefully nothing." Emily grit her teeth.

They both watched as Miss Robinson explained the situation to someone on the phone. It was very quick this time, and she extended the phone to Emily mouthing that 'she was in a bad mood,' probably referring to the Head of Operations.

"Marshall?" Emily said on the phone.

"Pope. What's so urgent for you to call me?" She really sounded annoyed, but also a bit curious. She might've answered her call just because it was highly unusual and honestly, Emily didn't care a bit right now, as long as she paid attention. 

"Listen, Director Trench is compromised. He's been taken by a hostile force called the Hiss, and he might be on his way to opening a portal to let this force in right now. He's going to do it in the Nostalgia Department with an OOP. Please Marshall, you must intercept him!"

For a long moment, there was no response. Both Jesse and Miss Robinson looked very clueless as to what Emily said, but they were polite enough not to ask right at the moment.

After what felt like an eternity, Marshall replied. "How do you know that?" One could practically see her squinting along with the question. Emily was too frantic to feel intimidated, though.

"By living through it once," She blurted out. "Please just go after him, please , that's of the utmost importance!"

"I have a lot of questions about this, Pope, and you'd better answer them after I go check on this." There was an implied threat hanging in her words, but Emily could only feel relieved she trusted her enough to go by her words.

"I will. But there's something else: I have a visitor for Dylan Faden here."

"What?!" both Marshall and Jesse shouted, for wildly different reasons. Jesse continued her part with a "Why are you telling her I'm here, this is not safe, they'll try to snatch me!" and Marshall with "Who?! His sister?! How did you get in contact with her, why did you bring her here?!"

Emily ignored the jumbled mess of talking that resulted from them speaking over each other, and raised her voice so she could be heard. "If you don't let her in I will; I have the clearance. It's past the time you guys fixed your mistakes. — but do go see Trench first, please. It's urgent."

"You're not Pope. She'd never talk like this."

"Oh I most definitely am — just not your version of me. She might be at Central Executive right now checking for a regulation form for Black Rock testing before tragedy strikes like I was in my timeline, she might be doing something else or she might even be absent, I'm not sure about the intricacies of this particular way of travelling yet." 

There was a pause. Marshall was probably considering her course of action, and Emily felt all her newfound courage falter under the weight. Where did all that might come from, anyway? Was it from knowing she could actually help Jesse get to her brother this time? Was she trying to make up for the failure in that front in her own plane of existence?

Polaris appeared in her view, sending her a sense of warmth and care. She didn't want her pulling herself down, it seemed.

"You're going to wait with the girl in the designated waiting room for me to come and get you. Don't even think about taking a step towards the inner House, you heard me?"

"As long as you promise you're not going to hurt, imprison, drug, immobilize, or bring any sort of harmful action towards us in any way."

"Darling and Trench will want to talk to you. I wouldn't roast my own ass like that." She hung up.

Emily sighed in relief.

"What the hell was that?!" Jesse asked, clearly vexed. 

"As far as Marshall goes, that's the best we will get."

"You just told her I—  They've been trying to get me my whole life!"

"Actually, they've been monitoring you your whole life, Jesse." Emily gave her a compassionate look. "If they wanted to get you, they would've done it already."

" What?" She didn't shout it; rather, she let out a low, dangerous grunt. If Emily didn't know her, she probably wouldn't have noticed the fear flashing in her eyes. She was like a cornered predator — terrifying but also terrified. 

"There's a lot they have to tell you."

"There's a lot you could tell me, and know that the only reason I don't punch you in the face right now is because Polaris is with you." Jesse replied, sharp as a knife, and it hurt Emily in such a way she even lost her train of thought. Jesse was actively hostile to her. Emily had come to think of Jesse as an unshakable protector and a safe listener, someone who would never willingly do her harm. Hearing her talk like that was unsettling, it felt wrong, even. 

"Dr. Pope, ma'am?" One of the guards nearby approached. "Marshall wants me to escort you to the waiting room. Please come with me."

Emily looked at Jesse and nodded. She pursed her lips, but let the guard guide her to the room as well.

—

A rather unquantifiable amount of time passed. The clock said it had been half an hour max, but their perception told them it might as well be ages with how long it took for the pointers to change. Emily and Jesse were waiting in a corner room, one of the few with solid concrete walls and an actual door. It was near the entrance hall, just past the giant paintings of Director Trench and Dr. Darling. Emily didn't know if those were affected by staff changes like the ones further inside the building, so there was no using them to know if those two were okay - or at least alive - for the moment. Emily had to write a reminder to check the paintings in her own plane when she returned and the lockdown was over.

While Emily was lost in her own thoughts, Jesse was pacing through the room relentlessly. 

"So we're just going to wait until they come bringing six guards and their guns. Great plan!" She blurted out suddenly, gesticulating harshly while she kept walking. She didn't even stop walking or looked at Emily.

"What do you suggest? We knock out the guard outside?" Emily gave her a pointed look, hoping she'd realize how absurd the suggestion was. Instead, Jesse looked at her and raised an eyebrow, considering. "Jesse, no!"

"He'd come in if you asked him to take care of something."

"We're not doing that!" Emily protested. 

"Yeah I followed your plan before and it didn't—" She stopped mid-sentence, focused on something in front of her and frowned. "Did this room have a door there before?"

Emily blinked, then looked behind her. There really was a door there. She immediately got up and went to open it , revealing a corridor exactly like the one they came from, but completely deserted. "We're in luck. Come on!"

They passed through empty office spaces with papers strewn over tables, boards with unfinished equations on them, even a projector turned on and streaming a slide to no one. They turned right, then left and right again, and they ended up in a corridor where an old man was mopping the floor without a care in the world as he mumbled along to the song he was listening to in his cassette player. Emily knew him. He was the man Polaris showed her before, wasn't he?

Polaris pulsed in her vision in agreement.

"Are you two going to be staring at me like two kids lost on the sidewalk?" He asked, not taking his eyes off the mop.

"Mr. Ahti?" Emily tried. "Is that you?"

"Yes, yes, that is my name." He waved her off. "It is not the time for talk though, you two have to run up there and beat some sense into that old dog's head, saatana." He spit the last words like they were poison in his mouth. "And you" he pointed at Jesse "are in time for the interview. Janitor's assistant. You tell them I sent you."

"Uh, right." Jesse frowned.

"He's up there, but you should run with your head as your third leg if you want to see him well," Ahti said, seemingly answering Jesse, even though she asked no question. That piqued Emily's interest immediately, and she couldn't miss the way Jesse's eyes widened and her nostrils flared at his words. 

"Thank you!" Jesse took off running, and Emily wasn't near quick enough to keep up with her pace. 

They turned a few more corners and ended up at a short corridor with an elevator door at the end. Jesse was already pressing the button when Emily caught up with her. The doors parted smoothly, revealing the interior of a service elevator with a janitor’s cart inside. There was only one button lit in the console, and that was the one Jesse almost smashed as soon as they were both inside.

"Jesse," Emily called. "You won't be able to just walk in and go after your brother."

"I figured." 

"What's your plan, then?"

"I… don't know," Jesse admitted, clenching her fists.

"You don't—"

"Polaris told me to be here today, right at this exact time, and it was important. I trust her. I don't know how it'll be, but we'll make it work."

Polaris spun in Emily's vision bringing a strong sense of finality with her: Emily felt like she was trying to tell her of an outcome, something that already happened or was about to, but the message wasn't reaching her as it should.

Can you explain it somehow? She tried.

Polaris pulsed in agreement and showed her a scene: it was her, sitting in the Board Room, and Jesse's voice echoing in her ears — " We did it together."

Emily blinked and the scene was gone. She took a glance at Jesse by her side.

You wanted her to meet me? 

There was a pulse in the prisms, something Emily could definitely identify as an affirmation by now.

I think she might hate me, though…

Polaris answered by spinning slower, softer. Almost feeling like a pat on the shoulder. She didn't feel too worried, so Emily took it as a good sign. 

"Listen, as soon as we step out we're going to the sector elevator. Don't stop to talk to anyone." The elevator came to a stop. "We're going after Darling in the—"

As soon as it opened the doors, they could hear the sound of gunfire. They crouched instinctively, and Jesse pulled the janitor cart in front of them for some cover.

"What the hell?" She took a peek at the situation outside. "It's a war zone out there!"

Emily did the same and took a peek from her side of the cart. She could see desks torn apart everywhere, impact craters, paper flying. The room itself looked spacious, but she couldn't see any distinguishing features from her spot. She couldn't recognize the place like that. "Don't look at me, I have no clue!"

"Can't we go back?" Jesse tried.

Emily glanced up, to the elevator console. "There's no button for that!"

"Fuck—" Jesse stopped abruptly, as if listening for something. Emily noticed a weird but familiar glint in her eye - she was probably talking to Polaris. "What, really? I don't want to be shot!" She frowned, made a grimace, then sighed. "Okay, fine. Only because I trust you!"

Emily understood what they were talking about one second too late. She was unable to prevent Jesse from darting away from cover and into the sector proper. She watched as she slid down behind a semi-destroyed desk and waited, her chest going up and down as her breath accelerated. Then someone entered their frame of vision: a man in a dark blue suit, balding head, a matte black gun in hand and a distressed expression in his face - Director Trench. Every shot he took was a new explosion somewhere to their right, Emily couldn't see but she definitely could hear it. Jesse ducked further down every time.

When it looked like he ran out of ammo - for the moment, at least - he turned to run. He took a couple of steps before Jesse tackled him and sent them both rolling through the floor.

"Jesse!" Emily shouted and got up to run towards her, but she remembered her training and ducked back down behind the cart. She would do no good in that situation, more so without a gun.

The bullets from the other side stopped immediately, if anything. Jesse was wrestling Trench on the floor, and when he moved on top of her to hit her with the back of the service weapon, she acted quickly and put her hands on each side of his head.

The scream he let out was piercing and distorted, a shrieking characteristic of the hiss coming alongside his voice. All the lights in the room became a blinding red. Trench started shaking violently in place like he was unable to leave Jesse's hold, and Jesse's hands and arms were shaking like the sheer strength of the resonance was a lot for her to manage.

Polaris flashed in Emily's mind, urging her on. She didn't need to tell her twice - Emily ran as fast as she could and also put her hands around Trench's head, joining the cleansing. He started shaking more violently, convulsing; Jesse, however, got a better hold of herself with Emily there to share the energy load. Polaris' prisms started appearing around Trench, spinning outwards, sending energy waves that got stronger each time. The last one sent a shockwave that made Emily fall on her ass, and reverted all the lights back to their normal color.

Trench fell limp on top of Jesse, who grunted in annoyance more than anything else. She shoved him partly aside and sat up, using the floor as support to extract her legs from below him.

"Jesse! Are you okay?!" Emily crawled to her side, worried, but she didn't answer. She was stiff, all of a sudden. "Jesse?"

She raised her right hand and put a gun against her head. Emily almost batted it away reflexively before she saw what it was: Trench's Service Weapon. In all that moving around, Jesse touched it.

"Oh fuck." Emily held her breath. It was true Jesse was the rightful Director in her timeline, but there was no telling what would happen in this one. Trench was still alive. What if the Board deemed her unworthy? She wasn't willing to see her put a bullet through her own head. She didn't have a say on the matter, though…

"Pope!" Marshall approached, limping. There was an improvised bandaging around her thigh so soaked in blood no one could tell its original color. She should be sitting down, not exerting herself - but this was Marshall right there, and Emily doubted she'd listen if she suggested a course of action. "What the hell did you do to Trench?!" She clenched her teeth and closed her eyes in a painful expression for a moment. "Is he dead?!"

"I don't think so, but—"

Marshall got close enough to notice what Jesse was holding, and it made her pause. "Shit." She muttered under her breath. "Get out of there girl, this is going to be ugly and it'll spray all over you."

Now that was a disgusting image. Emily opened her mouth, closed it and forced herself to speak again, out of pure outrage. "Excuse me?! She's the Director!"

"Trench is the Director." Marshall stated, matter-of-factly. "The Board won't be happy to—"

Jesse inhaled loudly, like she'd been drowning and just came back to the surface. She took the gun out of her head and placed it down on the floor, blinking furiously and looking from Trench, still out cold on the floor, to Emily. "I think… An inverted pyramid just made me Director? And this gun. It talked to me."

Emily exchanged a rather smug look with Marshall before turning her attention back to Jesse. "Welcome to the Bureau, Director Faden."

Jesse groaned. "Don't call me that."

Oh, so that's a constant. Emily thought. She couldn't help but smile.

—

They took Marshall and Trench to the Medical Wing, but not before Marshall ordered a couple of rangers to guard the place where Trench dropped the OOP until she was back. Wherever it was, they didn't pass it on the way out of the Nostalgia Department, and Emily was thankful for the small blessing; she was sure Jesse would learn what it was and what it was doing there soon enough, but at the moment they had a different quest to focus on, and it had Dylan"s name on it.

Jesse was the Director now. Marshall tried to brief her on what it meant on their trip to the Medical Wing - she was being carried by one of her men - but all Jesse wanted to know was where her brother was, and she asked so. Marshall didn’t like that. Jesse clearly didn’t give a damn to what she liked, but was polite about it.

“Your brother is here, in the Containment Sector. He’s dangerous.” Marshall said, as she was dropped on a bed. A nurse came immediately to see to her wound - blood was already streaming down her leg, despite the soaked rag.

Jesse gave her a sharp look, set her jaw in a way she did when she was fighting her temper in order to stay quiet. Emily had seen it more than a couple of times, and it always resulted in someone being scolded. With Marshall, though, that might get ugly very fast.

“Of course he is. That’s what you did to him. ” Jesse shot out under her breath.

Marshall barely frowned. She probably expected that reaction. Her appraising eyes never left Jesse, and Emily could bet she was linking her extensive knowledge of the monitoring they did on Jesse with the person in front of her. “We didn’t make him kill dozens of people, Director. ”

“Should’ve thought of that before you kidnapped and locked him up.” Jesse’s eyebrows shot up, her eyes were burning.

Emily put herself between Jesse and Marshall, bringing attention to herself before those two started a fight. “Thanks, Marshall. I will take Jesse there.“ She grabbed Jesse by the arm and started dragging her out of the room, hoping they wouldn’t just resume their argument.

“Pope!” 

Emily spun on her heels and faced Marshall again. 

“How do you know how to take her there? How do you know all of this?”

Emily was waiting for that at some point. She smiled. “It’s classified.”

She pulled out her clearance card and held it up where Marshall and everyone else could see it: it had a big 07 printed on bold letters and below it, the words Emily Pope - Head of Research. 

Marshall opened her mouth to voice her confusion, but Emily gave her back to her and resumed taking Jesse out through the door.

There had never been a level 7 clearance in the Bureau. Dr. Darling had the biggest one, level 6, and the level 9 clearance senior Rangers had referred to a whole different matter, the Clocks Threshold. Jesse had a clearance 7 card printed for Emily the week before as a symbolic act meant to tell her she had access to every- fucking -thing - Jesse’s words - in the Bureau. A clearance level as high as hers.

Emily couldn’t hide her smile remembering that, or the ache in her heart. Jesse trusted her this much; She’d find her. She’d bring her back.

—

"Who are you?" Jesse asked.

"Hm?" Emily turned to her absentmindedly. She'd been running possibilities and courses of action in her mind, and she didn't get what Jesse said exactly.

"Even that Marshall woman is confused about you. You said you weren't their Emily Pope before, on the phone, you know an awful lot you shouldn't, and you said you lived through things once. Who are you?"

Jesse stopped in the middle of Central Executive, and while she probably didn't notice it, they were exactly below the Black Pyramid. Emily glanced up and back at her. Concepts such as coincidence were something she didn't believe in, especially in the Oldest House. Was this an omen?

"I'm Emily Pope, Head of Research of the FBC," Emily answered calmly, upholding Jesse's stare. "But not in this reality. I'm just passing through."

Jesse inhaled, took the information in and exhaled with a frown. "I really shouldn't believe you. Why do I?"

Polaris danced on Emily's vision, reassuring, and by the way Jesse's eyebrows rose she was seeing her too. 

"Yes, of course," Jesse snickered. "I believe you too."

"Does Polaris actually talk to you?" Emily leaned in, taking her notepad and pen from her pocket. That was a great opportunity to learn more about her helpful companion, and she took the sound of chimes in her ears - a good natured chuckle? - as encouragement.

Jesse shifted her weight. She hummed and opened her mouth a couple of times but said nothing, clearly hesitating. It was understandable, she couldn't be used to talking about her friend openly like that. "Not with words, no, but sometimes I can parse her intent so clearly it might as well be a sentence. It… I got better at it with time."

Emily nodded, writing everything she could. "It makes sense. She shows me intents, feelings and images on occasion, but I must admit I have nowhere near the time you two have together. It's a new relationship," she joked.

"She'll never let you down." Jesse smiled with genuine fondness, and Emily noted mentally how sweet their bond was. They loved each other as much as family, even though they were different to a fundamental level. 

Polaris touched her mind softly, sent a whisper to her ear in Jesse's voice, probably a memory: around one constant they revolve.

Well, Emily thought, you two definitely revolve around the love you have for each other.

Polaris seemed to agree, but also sent Emily the impression of expansion, like she was enveloping her in warmth again.

Jesse, by her side, chuckled. "Whatever you told her, Pope, she's definitely trying to include you on it."

Oh. Was all Emily thought.

Polaris hit her with the sentence again: Around one constant, they revolve.

The three of us? Emily tried, knowing the answer already.

Her rational side kicked in, as it often did when her emotions were about to spike, and told her it wasn't time to get mushy, she was in the middle of Central Research and she had to take Jesse to the Panopticon. It was right, of course, and Emily shook her head and tried desperately to find something to divert her attention to before it was obvious she was starting to tear up. She found a figure at the corner of the room, talking to a man she knew to be an archivist. She'd looked for him on the day the Hiss invaded, but their meeting was cut short, then. Now, with no menace…

"Hey Jesse, look behind you, to your right, near the fire extinguisher. See those people?" Emily said.

"By which fire extinguisher— oh shit that's… You?!" Jesse's jaw dropped, just like Emily thought it would, and she loved it. 

"That's the right Emily for this space and time. You should go say hi sometime, she's going to love having you around - I know I do." 

With that, Emily pulled Jesse towards the elevator, as it was intended in the first place. 

—

It was good to have power. With one flick of her clearance card, Emily could shut up any questioning about their business and where they were headed. In the only instance where someone was skeptical of her "impossible" level seven clearance, Jesse only had to casually manifest her gun and say she was the new Director for the man to go pale and clear the way faster than Underhill would grab a Mold sample, crying out that he was only doing his job.

They got to the light cord, a wall of yellow neon highlighting the end of their path.

Jesse frowned. " This is the Panopticon?"

"Oh right, you don't—" Emily's words were cut short as her brain told her to go to the point, so she did. "This is the light cord. It's an OOP, an Object of Power - you have to pull it three times."

"To do what?"

"I'll show you." She closed her hand on the cord. "Hold my arm, please."

Jesse did, and Emily pulled the cord - the yellow neon on the wall turned blue.

"Oh." Jesse's eyes widened for a moment.

Emily pulled the cord once more - the yellow was back, but framed by blue light.

She pulled the cord one last time - the familiar smell of old carpet, cigarettes and cleaning products hit them at the same time the afternoon light flooded the hall ahead. They were in the Oceanview Motel.

"What the— where are we?" Jesse turned on her heels for a full 360 degrees, then went with quick steps to the entrance hall. "How did we even get here? "

"Through the light cord." Emily followed her calmly. "It takes us here, to the Oceanview Motel and Casino. It's a place of power."

Emily proceeded to tell Jesse how the place worked and ring the bell to start the ritualistic tasks the Motel would require of them for a safe passage. This time, they involved searching for things of Jesse's and putting them in their right spots: her jacket on the bed Emily had to put on a hanger in the first room, a picture of her from the P7 monitoring board she put in a frame in the second, a recording of her in a therapy session she turned off in the third. If the actual Jesse was freaked out by any of those things, she didn't show it - which was something Emily came to appreciate from her, how cool she could be in the face of the weirdest stuff. 

"Now we go back and the key must be on the counter." Emily sighed contently.

"That's it? You just fix a bunch of stuff and it lets you pass?"

"I wouldn't say fix, it was more of a tidying quest…"

Jesse furrowed her brow. "What?"

"Like I just put a picture in a frame and your jacket in the hanger?" Emily tried.

"You didn't do any of that." Now Jesse's eyes were wide. "You fixed a lamp on the desk, opened a stuck window and put a door knob back in place - you fixed things."

That was new. Never in her years at the FBC, Emily heard of two people going together to the Oceanview and reporting different rituals to pass through. This was uncharted, fascinating territory. Worrisome, also, depending on the angle you looked at it. What could be causing this deviation?

She decided she needed more data - and so they were back at the counter, picking up the keys to the black pyramid door. Emily was the one to open it, as she was the one who actively pulled the cord and did the tasks. There were no records indicating this actually mattered, but she didn't want to risk more deviations, not when the Motel was already displaying one.

Inside, as customary, was a black room with a painting illuminated on the wall. Emily sucked a breath when she saw what it depicted.

"So… What do you see, Jesse?" She asked.

"A very tall opening, a sort of concrete bridge surrounded by black and me. Why?"

"Because it's showing me something else."

"What? Is it bad? Will we have to shoot it?" 

Emily shook her head. "No, it's… it's time to go, I think. Only one way to find out." She closed a hand over the light cord and waited for Jesse.

"You're not going to die a terrible death, are you?" Jesse sounded really concerned this time. Maybe she didn't hate Emily, as it seemed before. That was nice.

"Not right now, I hope!" Emily chuckled. "I wish you and Dylan the best."

She pulled the cord.

"What?"

Again.

"Why that, all of a sudden—"

At the third pull, Emily saw herself alone in a room unknown to her, well lit and made completely out of the raw concrete that made the Oldest House. There was a pedestal in front of her, and the Report hovered lazily on it, a page turning on its own at a leisurely pace.

"She must be at the firewall right now." Emily sighed. 

Polaris spun in her vision, affirming it. Emily was very glad that wherever they were in the Oldest House, nothing seemed to be a problem for Polaris to find Jesse. It was reassuring.

"Well, time to go." She looked at the Report. "Please let this time be it."

She touched it, and once more she was falling out of the world.

—

Chapter Text

This time it was a weird passage. Weirder, anyway. 

Emily blinked, and she was in a corridor lit by blinding red light, but the most impressive and quite macabre part were the hiss corpses piling onto each other on every possible part of the floor, rendering traversing impossible. Emily saw many disturbing things during her time at the Bureau, she had to develop a resistance to blood, gore and horror that was only increased by the Hiss invasion, but she had to admit that scene was a lot. Those mangled, unnaturally twisted bodies all seemed to be staring at her through their bloodshot eyes… Suddenly it was very difficult to breathe. She closed her eyes and inhaled as deep as she could, even though air seemed to disappear from her lungs.

Emily, Emily, focus. She thought to herself. You can't panic now. They're dead. They can't harm you.

Polaris spun gently on her vision, trying to soothe her. Emily focused her inner eye on the spirals, on how the light glittered as the prisms moved. It helped.

Then she heard grunting and coughing by her side and opened her eyes, scanning the horrid scene for signs of life. She found Jesse trying to extract herself from under a pile of Hiss, a generous streak of blood running down her face from her hairline.

"Jesse!" Emily clenched her teeth and stepped on bodies to reach her friend. The way muscle felt under her heels was awful, and she tried not to think about how she might be breaking some people's bones as she stepped on their faces. 

"Emily…?" Jesse whispered, tilting her head in a display of drunken curiosity. Her half-lidded eyes were fixed in a point behind Emily, and she was clearly fighting to keep herself awake with how she barely kept her eyes open.

"Where are we?"

Jesse seemed to wake up more as she heard her voice and locked eyes with her, panic growing in her expression. "You shouldn't be here. There are so many of them…!"

"More?" Emily glanced at all the hiss below them. They should be dissipating in resonance by now. What was causing them to linger? Was it the thick concentration of hiss resonance? "Where's the nearest control point?" 

Emily stretched her hands and grabbed Jesse by the only arm that was free from the pile. She gave her all to pull her out, but it was difficult to get a good footing with dead people being crushed and slipping under her feet. Emily had to double her efforts, give it all she had.

That was when a jolt of energy passed through them, and she felt herself being pulled away from everything again. When she looked around, she was in a corridor in front of an office room with glass panelling that let her see inside. 

There were people working on computers with huge screens, all of it cutting edge tech. She could see 3d models on some of them, models of people. Models of… Arish? Emily tilted her head to see it better and she was right, that one model looked a lot like Arish. And on the monitor next to it, a perfect model of an FBC ranger, complete with helmet and cloak. 

Emily was slightly disturbed by that. What sort of simulations could those people be running if they needed accurate models of specific people?

"Your delivery was impeccable, Courtney. The despair, the dread. You could feel how Jesse was broken, it made my hair stand on end."

"Thank you, Sam. Jesse really needs a break."

That voice…! Emily whipped her head to the side and saw two people walking out of a room to her left, focused on some papers they were holding. The first was a man: angular, blond, with smart eyes and an easy smile. The second was Jesse, or at least someone who very much looked like her, but the man called her Courtney before. They turned towards Emily on the corridor, and the three locked eyes with each other.

“Jesse?” Emily tried.

The woman opened her mouth to reply, but Emily couldn’t hear what she said. She was dragged away once more, dropped mercilessly at another reality/dream/unknown option. 

She found herself gripping tight the safety railing of a balcony, her legs unsteady under her, breath coming in short huffs. Emily wasn't one to complain about the side effects of paranatural phenomena, but she had to admit it was really annoying to have her body reacting sickly everytime she was pulled around. Maybe there was a way to counter that, like astronaut suits insulated people from the dangers of outer space? Emily pulled out her notepad and wrote with a shaky hand a reminder for her to follow up on this later.

A couple of minutes were enough for her affliction to calm down, and she finally made sense of the place she was in, an apartment in New York, she recognized the view. One glance back towards the living room confirmed her theory: dark wooden floor, bookshelves full of books going up to the ceiling, a comfortable grey couch, a fluffy rug the color of linen. She was in her father's place. That was very, very strange.

What does he have to do with all this? Emily thought, and Polaris spun in a way that told her she also didn't have a clue.

She decided to walk in to get her answers, trying her best to keep the uneasy pooling in her inside in check. The afternoon light cast a warm glow on the furniture bringing an eerie effect, almost similar to the Oceanview Motel. It made Emily question if she was inside an instance of it made to look like her father's apartment, which would be quite unsettling. Was it just a dream, or something else? An alternate reality? Was the distinction a fallacy?

She didn't have a way to know any of that in the present moment, but she could hear voices coming from the direction of the kitchen, so she steeled herself and walked towards it. Emily was ready to see something weird, maybe disturbing, even deal with dead people. She really didn't expect to see Jesse with her hair styled to the side, sporting a steel-grey turtleneck with a black blazer on her shoulders, impeccable black jeans and boots, leaning on the counter and laughing. She clearly dressed for an occasion and hell, she was stunning… Were it not for the strangeness of the situation, Emily would've stared at her like a fool, enraptured by the sight. However, by Jesse’s side was Emily's father: an older wheat-blond man, with short slicked back hair and a well-trimmed beard that was mostly white. He was the one doing the talking, and he looked like he was enjoying the company - his smile was a lot like Emily's. He too was well dressed - more than usual, which was a fair amount already - in an elegant blue sweater and his tailored pants. 

Emily had to blink a couple times before the image even made sense in her mind, and it was time enough for Jesse to notice her presence.

"Em!" Jesse's eyes lit up as she saw her enter the room. Her smile was big, unapologetic. "Did you find out what it was?"

"What?" Emily furrowed her brow.

"Yeah, the thing you saw on the balcony. Was it a monster?" Jesse joked.

"Oh. No, it was a…" Quick, Emily, think of something!  "a pigeon. Very underwhelming."

"Shame." Jesse shrugged, and took a couple of steps in her direction. "You okay, love?"

Emily's reaction to the pet name might've been the icing on the cake if anyone was suspicious before. Emily could feel the heat on her cheeks and ears, her heart thumping against her chest. Jesse called her love?  "Yes, perfectly! Can you come here a minute? Uh, work matters." 

"You government people and your secrets." Emily's father shook his head, chuckling. "I'll be here watching the oven."

Emily all but dragged Jesse to the living room when she was at reach. They stopped at a point where her father couldn’t see them, and Emily really tried to ignore how close to her Jesse stopped, innocently - like it was something usual between them. Like they were lovers. 

"Jesse I need you to tell me a couple of things." Emily said, urgently. Jesse's playful confusion turned into focus in a second, like it did out there in the field. "Are you the Director? Am I Head of Research? What's the status in the FBC right now?"

"Yes, yes and good, I think, since we've both been able to take the weekend off at the same time after God knows how long." Jesse didn't bat an eye at the weirdness of the questions, thankfully.

"Okay, good! Good. Really important question now: what are we doing at my father's apartment?"

This time, Jesse's eyebrows rose slowly, and she took a whole second to answer. "We're here because you wanted to introduce me officially. Why, having second thoughts?" Jesse joked, but there was a little bit of worry in her eyes.

Emily's jaw dropped. "Holy mother of God, we're dating." At the same time she felt like smiling, her heart raced, her head spun, she was pretty sure she was hit by lightning…

Jesse smiled, clearly relieved, snickering at her reaction. "You look like a child who just got the biggest gift at Christmas. It's cute."

Oh god— we're dating!

Polaris appeared in Emily's view with her prisms twinkling more than usual, their chimes sounding like laughter. It wasn't funny, it couldn't possibly be funny, Emily didn't know what she should do at the moment! Okay, maybe it was funny, but it still was a hell of a surprise. Should she jump at Jesse and kiss her, should she dance on the spot, should she awkwardly tell her she loved her?

She should tell her what was going on, that was the right thing to do. But god, they were dating!

Polaris somehow suppressed Emily's agitation on the matter when she got to the right conclusion. She could feel her influence like one can feel anaesthesia before a surgery.

Okay, you're right. Thanks. Jesus, this is awkward…

"I— wow. Jesse I really, really want to kiss you so bad right now"

Jesse's smile turned a lot more devious. "I'm available!"

"—but that wouldn't be right, shit, I hate this. Listen, I'm not your Emily. I'm still me, calm down!" She added as soon as she saw the alarmed look Jesse gave her "but from a different plane - or alternative reality. I, uh… we're not dating there, but god, I wish— anyway, not the important part!"

Emily proceeded to summarize what was going on in her reality and how she ended up there, and Jesse's reactions went all over the place, even though she looked unbothered the whole time. Emily had gotten good at discerning her emotions overtime, and she was embarrassingly aware of how gay of her that was.

"Okay, I just want to say it's just like us to have one be replaced right at the first official family lunch." Jesse's laughter was nervous, she brushed some hair out of her face. "What do we do now?"

"I let Polaris cleanse you and then we look for the Report" Emily looked over her shoulder towards the kitchen. "Preferably before dad notices something is up, because I don't want to ruin your evening."

"Oh no, you couldn't possibly. If someone is going to ruin things, that's me." Jesse scratched the back of her neck, with a strained smile.

"Unlikely. I'd say dad already loves you, by how excited he was talking to you."

"He might discover I only have a GED and things would get pretty—"

The front door opened, making them both around. A woman walked in, her face an older, sterner version of Emily's: the same blue eyes, but with longer hair that she wore in a low bun. She carried herself with the bearing of a queen, but a merciless one; Emily inhaled sharply.

" What are you doing here ." Emily hissed, immediately putting herself between Jesse and the woman. 

The woman tilted her head, mildly curious. "Why, I was under the impression my own daughter had planned this meeting with the intent of presenting her partner to her parents. Was it a mistake on my part to cancel my schedule so I could come, my dear?"

Before Emily could say anything, Jesse intervened. "Of course not, Mrs. Pope!" She put her hands on Emily's shoulders and maneuvered her out of the way with a smile on her face. "Emily's joking, she's been beaming all week about how you cancelled a lecture in an important symposium to have lunch with us!"

I did that? Emily’s eyes got wide.

Mrs. Pope looked from Jesse to Emily and back, unreadable, and opened an amused smile. "Your attempt is charming, Miss Faden, but there's no need for softening the facts. I know my girl is worried about the symposium; she was always very serious about work practices."

Jesse looked a bit confused, but ended up chuckling and extending a hand to mask it. "Please call me Jesse. It's a pleasure to finally meet you."

She shook her hand. "Likewise. I heard a lot about you, Jesse, and I'm curious; Emily's not one to exaggerate her claims."

"I hope they're good then!"

"Naturally. She knows better than to accept anything unworthy — she learnt well."

Emily had been trying to keep quiet since Jesse's interference, to act rational and collect all the information she could about this unforeseen development. She vastly misjudged her capacity to stand the situation, though, and now she was walking in quick steps to bathroom before she did anything stupid.

It was an impossible task for her to stand near her mother without having a visceral fight or flight reaction. The great Elizabeth Pensky: brilliant Neuroscientist, a reference when it came to emergency surgeries. Also a terrible human being and a worse mother, someone who tried at every turn to make Emily a copy of herself, punishing her harshly when she deviated from her intricate plans. Emily still had nightmares involving report cards, classes she didn't want to take and intense disapproval.

How could Emily have invited her to meet her girlfriend in this reality?

That woman terrorized her life for so long, and did so in a way that looked like she was only a good mother worried about her daughter's development. EmIly remembered so well all the times she had to muffle her crying with her pillow or at the shower, she’d usually hide and try her best to be silent, to not have to hear her sharp words: she was a disgrace, letting her emotions get the best of her like that. She was a burden. She had no reason to be unhappy, she had everything. She'd never be someone if she didn't try harder.

Emily looked at her reflection in the bathroom mirror. She had to get that woman away from her family. She would not get her claws back on them, she absolutely wouldn't get to Jesse . God, the damage she could do to Jesse—

"Emily!" Jesse appeared on the door, and when she saw her state, she immediately got in and held Emily's face in her hands. "Em, what's wrong?"

"I— I—" It was difficult to talk. There was something in her throat suffocating her, constricting her chest, making her shake and shiver and lose the grasp on her own body, like she was going to float away from it.

Jesse looked at her closer and realized quickly what was going on. Unfortunately, she had a lot of firsthand experience with things like that. "It's okay. Focus on me, yes? We're going to breathe together."

She guided Emily through calming breathing cycles, and gently had her sit down on the toilet to be a bit more comfortable. It took some time of breathing and reassuring words from Jesse for Emily to start feeling the crushing sensation subside, and she hugged Jesse as soon as she noticed it. 

"Sorry, sorry, sorry..." She whispered, wishing they weren't standing in a somewhat awkward hug so she could bury her face in Jesse's neck and forget everything.

"Hey, no one plans on having a panic attack, Em. I'd know; I've had plenty."

"This woman— my mother, she—" Emily started talking, but just evoking the image made her anxiety spike again, so she gasped and stopped.

"Don't exert yourself." Jesse warned. "You need to lay low and feel safe now."

Emily nodded, but even so, she really wanted Jesse to just understand. "In my reality. She's horrible."

"I can see that, if this is what being around her does to you." Jesse held her tighter. "We can leave. I'll tell them it's a side-effect from a classified experiment you were running and I need to take you back so they can run some tests, what do you think?"

Emily would love that, but at the same time she felt guilty - she'd be running a day both Jesse and the other Emily had looked forward to. She already was, in a way. Oh god, it was complicated. "I need to lay down."

Jesse nodded. "Just tell me where to take you."

—

"There, I told them you had a hallucination followed by a panic attack caused by some remnant of a chemical reaction that went awry at work. How's my sciency lingo?" Jesse smiled kindly as she sat down on the bed, placing a hand on Emily's arm.

"Wonderful." Emily scooted closer until her legs touched Jesse. Her warmth was comforting. "But they'll want to take me to the hospital…"

"There's no need for that. You, as a brilliant and very resourceful Head of Research, was already aware this could happen and brought an antidote with you."  Jesse smiled proudly.

Emily sighed in relief. "Thank you." 

"Now you rest." She caressed Emily's arm and leaned in to kiss her forehead, but remembered it wasn't her Emily and stopped.

"No, please do it…" Emily mumbled. She was an afflicted woman, she certainly deserved a harmless kiss like that, right?

Jesse seemed to think so. She snickered and kissed her as intended, then ran her fingers through Emily's hair, drawing a grunt of approval. "Is this okay?"

"Yes…" Emily purred.

She said nothing more, just kept caressing Emily's hair, and Emily was very thankful for that - Jesse always brought a sense of safety with her, it was always so easy to relax near her, but Emily had to admit that feeling her touch was even better.  She could focus on how her fingers felt, the repetitive motions, how nice it all was… Her body slowly went from thinking something was going to harm her to enjoying the moment, and she all but melted under the attention. That, and the fact panic attacks usually leave people exhausted, made it natural for her to fall asleep. She could deal with things when she woke up…

—

Emily didn't sleep much, she rarely did. The curtains were drawn, casting the room in gentle shadow, but it was still day outside - Good. Emily didn't want to lose even more time. It was embarrassing enough that she felt unwell and made people worry.

She sat up slowly, feeling like she was moving through water - it wasn't exactly difficult, but there was a sort of resistance to it. She rolled her neck and stretched her arms, thinking about what to do next. Was she feeling good enough to rejoin the others?

Oh no, Jesse is alone with my parents!

That thought alone made Emily scramble out of bed. She knew how anxious Jesse was about this meeting. She wanted to make a good impression, she even took the time to go to a hairdresser and repaint her nails, but she feared Emily's parents would label her a simpleton, with her lack of a proper education. Emily tried to reassure her they knew people's worth couldn't be measured by their education, but Jesse worried all the same. There was an underlying self-worth Issue there, and Emily would suggest again that Jesse could benefit from some therapy sessions, but at a later date. Right now she had to see how she was doing and be by her side.

Emily was still sluggish, but at least this was the only thing left bothering her. Otherwise her mind was sharp, her senses returned in full and she was pretty hungry.

"Emily!" Her father was the first to see her appear in the living room, and he gave her a big, relieved smile. "How are you feeling, sweetie?"

"Way better than before, thanks." She gave him a smile on her own. "What did I miss?"

"We're just bullying Jesse relentlessly with questions, nothing to worry about." He pointed with his head toward Jesse, who was sitting on the couch in front of him and Mrs. Pope.

"But I got to know all about your science fair experiments, so it's been great!" Jesse chuckled.

Her shoulders were a bit tense, but she seemed comfortable otherwise. Emily looked for signs of distress - gripping things, physically pulling away from people, wary eyes - but found nothing of the sort. It was good, if a bit surprising.

"Oh really? Which one is your favorite? The battery?" Emily wasn't embarrassed by her projects. They were her first steps into science, and flawed as they were, it was an invaluable experience.

"No, the water purifier. You did it to help people, it's so much like you." The way she said it was so soft, reverent even. Emily fell for her even more every time she did that. Extradimensional beings cowered at the sight of Director Jesse Faden, the sheer power she wielded, and yet she could do things like this... It shouldn't be possible, and it definitely shouldn't be legal to be this enchanting.

"And she did it when she was seven!" Mr. Pope added, the picture of a proud father.

"Such a bright child." Her mother agreed.

Emily smiled, pleased with the free praise, but a shiver ran down her spine. Something in the back of her mind was setting off alarms she couldn't comprehend: there was absolutely nothing wrong with her parents being sweet to her. Her father especially, but even her mother had a way to tell her she was proud sometimes. 

"You're all adorable." She ended up saying, sitting by Jesse on the couch. "I hope you didn't wait for me to have lunch!"

"No, but there's a plate for you in the oven." Mr. Pope said. "Are you feeling better?"

"Yes, thanks. I'm sorry about that…"

"Don't apologize. It comes with your job, if it's as dangerous as sometimes it seems to be." Emily's mother stated. "You were aware of the risks and acted accordingly; we may be a little anxious about additional effects, but we trust your judgement."

It was such a relief to hear that, and at the same time, something inside Emily recoiled from it. What was going on? "Thanks, mom."

"Besides, Jesse was very set on taking care of you. She checked on you numerous times."

Jesse smirked, but it was shy and she was definitely blushing. It was adorable how she still did that, despite them being together for a while already. Emily took her hand and kissed her knuckles.

"She's the best. "

"Just repaying all the times you make sure I don't die out there," Jesse said playfully, but they both knew how true it was. 

"How romantic." Emily chuckled. "I'm going to get my food and be right back."

By the time the food was warm up and Emily came back, people in the living room were discussing the recent protests happening throughout the country. Apparently Emily's father discovered some of Jesse's distrust for authority, and she discovered his revolutionary tendencies as an Anthropologist; they were having a blast dunking on systemic police brutality, acclaiming protesters, comparing urban guerilla tactics. Her father didn't know why Jesse had such an extensive knowledge of that, and it was for the best, but Emily doubted his opinion of her would change if he knew. He might like her even more, if anything.

Her mother was quieter, as always. She liked to observe and come up with her own hypothesis. Emily found she was paying a lot of attention to her as well, with a worried expression - she probably feared for her health, which was understandable and kind of her. 

Emily didn't think the conversation would flow so well on its own, she'd been ready to come with some starters (mostly the cutest/funniest/slightly embarrassing stories from their daily life she could tell and weren't classified) but the fact she wouldn't need them was very satisfying. As always she worried a lot, made a lot of plans for possible outcomes, and Jesse came and surprised her in the best ways.

If someone asked Emily what she wanted for herself a couple of years back, she'd say finally getting access to Dr. Darling's classified research, joining him in Dimensional, and probably getting a couple more hours of sleep if possible. She wouldn't dream her happiness could come from watching her family - all of it - interacting in a wholesome, accepting manner towards each other. She loved all of them, and she felt her heart could burst from all that love. She only hoped Jesse could feel like she belonged, too.

Then a strange notion came to Emily's mind: swirling lights, and a feeling something was off. She couldn't put a finger on it, but it was somewhat like the feeling she got around altered materials, or when the House was giving signs of a shift. Was she being paranoid, after feeling unwell due to the chemicals? It would be a plausible explanation.

"So, Emily told me you two go dancing in your spare time!" Jesse, unaware of Emily's mental inquiries, kept talking. She looked genuinely interested in the conversation. 

"Sometimes, yes," Mrs. Pope answered, a small smirk on the corner of her lips. "Unfortunately we're both very busy all the time, so it's a rare occurrence."

"Which only makes it more special in my eyes," Mr. Pope offered. "And the only times where I can lead you into something!"

Everybody laughed, but Mrs. Pope had an undisguised competitive look in her eyes. "You wish."

"Excuse me? You can't deny I make you soft with some Sinatra on the radio, my love! I could do it right now!"

Emily cheered. "Show her, dad! Do it!"

"Don't promise things you can't do, John, dear." Mrs. Pope gave him an appraising look and opened a smile.

Mr. Pope raised a finger as if asking for time, got up, dragged the center table to one side and went to his sound system. He fiddled with buttons and put a CD on, pressed a couple more buttons. When the first notes of a song started he went back to his wife and offered a hand.

She rolled her eyes, but took it.

They headed to the middle of the room, now with a considerable cleared space for their demonstration.

Emily always loved watching her parents dance. She wasn't a kid who wanted to be a princess - in fact, her favorite movie was Atlantis when she was little, and she wanted to be a mix of the protagonist, an adorable scientist, and the badass evil lady - but she did feel inside a fairy tale as her parents waltzed around their big living room at the time. It was one of the moments they were more intimate with each other, she could see there was love between them despite everything.

Even now, as they spun softly to the sound of bass, brass and piano, she could see it in the way they looked at each other. Her father, all smiles - her mother, a serious expression, but their eyes trained on each other, connected. 

Emily wondered if that was how she and Jesse looked to people, and almost immediately concluded that it should be the case, but in a more useless way. They were known to stare, Dylan especially loved to groan and whine every time they were being "boring, disgusting lovers", as he put it. They'd usually turn it against him and say something really lewd or even more sweet to get him flustered and away. Emily snickered at that and, having finished eating, she put her plate on the side table and rested her head on Jesse's shoulder. She definitely didn't mind being all sappy with her.

Jesse hugged her shoulder and leaned closer as a response. "They really are good." She whispered.

"Of course they are, I had to learn somewhere." Emily chuckled.

"You feeling better? More like yourself?" Jesse asked.

"Yeah. Shouldn't I?" Emily raised her head to look at her. "The chemical poisoning shouldn't cause any form of depersonalization…"

"No, that wasn't— i mean the whole thing about being from another reality?"

Emily's eyes got wide. It felt like being hit in the gut, but mentally - her memories being torn apart and below them, her true memories reemerging. She was Emily Pope, Head of Research, on a mission to find and retrieve her Director from the alternate reality she might've been thrown in. She wished to bring Dylan back as well, if she could find him.

And, right now, she was in the same room as her mother, who gave her a panic attack earlier that day. 

"Em?" Jesse studied her with her piercing eyes, both curious and worried. 

"I remembered." Emily hid her face on Jesse's shoulder and held tight to her back. " Fuck, I— help..."

Jesse held her for a moment, quiet, probably not knowing what exactly she could do to help in that situation. Then she placed a hand on Emily's head, near her temple.

"Emily, close your eyes. Breathe." She said it gently, but in a commanding tone. It was something she perfected in her time as a Director, and it always worked to bring Emily to the moment - and so she obeyed her request, even if it was really difficult.

Something resounded from Jesse's hand to Emily's head. She felt the vibration expanding through her skull, surprisingly pleasant. It immediately suppressed her overloaded senses and quieted her emotions, like she was suddenly plunged into a lake of silence and protection; nothing could hurt her there. 

Polaris appeared in her view despite her closed eyes, and brought the characteristic sound of chimes with her. Her image got clearer, stronger, and Emily felt like her body was vibrating gently to her resonance. It felt and looked entirely like being alone inside Polaris' vortex once more.

"She asked me to do it." Jesse said in an echo-y voice behind Emily, which made her whip back, surprised. "To pull you in like I do with Dylan sometimes, we talk through her. I didn't know it would work but then again, you got her too!"

"Polaris? I mean, of course it's Polaris." Emily put a hand on her temple, creased her brow. "I'm sorry. I'm not well."

"Yeah, that's why we're here." Jesse smiled, compassionate, and approached. She stopped midway, however, and looked around like she was listening for something. "Okay. I, uh, I'm going to cleanse you."

"What?" Emily frowned. "But I've been the one cleansing—"

"Just trust her, it's what I do." Jesse shrugged, and placed both hands on the sides of Emily's head. 

All of Polaris crystals started expanding and contracting like waves of energy were passing over them. Emily felt the resonance in her head again, strong and soothing, and a surge of vitality like she could do anything she wanted. She saw herself and Jesse reflected in the prisms again, just like the time at the entrance to the Bureau, but now Emily was drawn to a specific image much quicker: the Jesse who was fading from sight, the one she'd seen in a scrapyard and who now was looking straight at her through the prismatic light.

Where are you? Emily thought with every inch of willpower she could muster.

Jesse's expression turned sad in the prism. She reached for Emily from the image, and her hand passed through it. Polaris's crystals exploded like a supernova of geometric shards.

Everything was light, and the only thing Emily could see clearly was the Report In front of her. She threw herself at it almost as a reflex, a way to save herself from whatever just happened.

Immediately Emily was falling, too fast to make sense of. A big cloud of dust rose when she hit the ground a second later, but it didn't hurt more than falling back from a chair would've, despite the ridiculously high speed she fell. That was good news, finally, as becoming a human pancake on the side of a dusty road in terrible conditions would be very embarrassing.

Emily sat up and groaned, checking her head and patting her clothes. There was no sign of the record nearby, but she could see a big sign some distance away:

Welcome to Ordinary - ME

Population: 0

Chapter Text

Emily took the time to sit and write the important information she needed in her journey: who she was, what she did, and a brief description of the places and situations she'd been through in her search for Jesse through what she believed to be alternate realities. The only reason she didn't do it before was out of urgency, and now it was of the utmost importance due to the recent discovery that she could have her memories suppressed by ones supposedly coming from her version native to the corresponding reality if she slept. Emily confirmed with Polaris she wasn't affected by this effect, and asked her to remind her to look at the notes should she ever lose herself again. If they were lucky, reading about one's true memories would work to remind her as well as hearing someone talk about them.

The wind howled in Emily's ears as she walked towards Ordinary. She mumbled the identification incantations under her breath, keeping her eyes open for any reaction around her, but the only sign of movement - and life - were leaves shaking with the breeze.

The quiet was unnerving. There were no birds or critters around. No rats. It was as if life had left that place and was unwilling to return. Emily wondered if it was an aftereffect of the AWE, something else affecting the place or even a different event she couldn't identify because she didn't have enough information yet. She was in an alternate timeline - who was to say a completely different AWE didn’t take place?

Of course, her job as a scientist was to find answers to the challenging questions, and even if her main mission was to look for Jesse, there was always something she could learn. She pulled the couple of instruments she brought from their holsters and started measuring energies as she got closer to the first houses in town.

The place was flooded in paranatural energies. The levels were so absurd they were comparable to Bright Falls in the middle of an AWE, and that was probably the most paranatural place the Bureau ever recorded. There was a possibility Emily's equipment was malfunctioning, of course, but it was lined with Black Rock for such occasions and it showed no sign of deviation. She’d take the measurements as true for the moment. One thing she was absolutely certain of, though, was that she had to be very careful going into town. She could feel a thick, odd energy coming from further inside.

It was, as she suspected, a ghost town. The houses were crumbling, covered in dirt and dead plant life. With each one she passed, a wave of a negative emotion hit her: confusion, then anxiety, fear… It was visceral, and too much like Emily's previous panic attacks. She had to stop and center herself after each attempt of progress. 

What are those? Do you think they're impressions?

Polaris shimmered faintly on Emily's view - not rapidly like she did when she affirmed something, or haltingly, when she denied. She was probably unsure of an answer.

Luckily, Ordinary was a really small place. Emily only had to endure two more of those dreadful waves until she got to the middle of the town, right by the public school. It was a big building: two-storey, C-shaped, unremarkable. Anywhere else and it would blend in seamlessly with the city, but here it was the biggest building, probably a landmark. It was a funny detail for Emily, who lived most of her life in New York. 

Less funny were the shadows she noticed in front of its entrance, though. They vanished as soon as Emily perceived them consciously, leaving the sound of unintelligible chatter and laughter of dozens of people in her ears.  

She pursed her lips and forced herself to walk away. She wasn't a fool to try to investigate this further, being under-equipped as she was, nor was she Jesse, who could seemingly deal with anything. She'd stick to her original plan of finding the house belonging to the Fadens, and see what would turn up there.

Polaris showed up in her view, momentarily limiting it to the path forward before disappearing. It was good to be reassured she'd show Emily the way, because she'd spend way too long looking through ruins if she was on her own.

Whatever it was the shady apparitions did, it persisted through Emily's solitary walk through the street, and lowered the effect of the waves of sensations that would till come out of nowhere occasionally: She heard the sound of sirens while passing by a rusting police car, felt its anger; she saw more shifting shadows behind fences and by lamp posts, heard the sound of people talking and the buzzing of a polishing machine while in the vicinity of an old car shop. 

She stepped in the vicinity of an unassuming house, in every way like the others she saw in town, and her senses were instantly overloaded: the deafening cry of a child in her ears, the wetness of its tears running freely through Emily’s face, pooling on her shirt, the shaking and numbing on her hands, her throat hurting from screaming but at the same time closing, and each time breathing was a battle—

Mama where are you?! MAMA?!  It echoed in her mind, so loud—

— Fuck— Polaris— Help—

It felt like being hit by a punch in the gut, but the overload left Emily as Polaris’ crystals spun wildly in her view, too bright, causing all sorts of other shapes to form and morph too fast for her to comprehend. She had a moment of panic thinking that was it, her brain would get fried and maybe she’d join Darling in the extraplanar atomized scientists club, but the motions slowed gradually to the point she could access her own senses again. She realized she was laying on the tarmac at a considerable distance from the spot where the whole assault on her senses happened in the first place. 

What the fuck was that. She groaned mentally, to Polaris, and let go of a breath she had been holding unconsciously. Thanks…

Polaris wasn’t gone from her view entirely, and now she was working on calming Emily’s nerves, it seemed. She did sound her chimes happily in response, though, and resumed her task.

Emily’s brain kept trying to pull her in the direction of rationalizing and coming up with hypotheses for what just happened - the most prominent one being that she experienced a sort of imprinted memory, similar to the altered effect of the Eagle Limited - but she gently brought it back to her present intent: breathing exercises. She had a purpose, she had to calm down and focus on it. Her goal was the Fadens house.

Emily sat up, took a deep breath and noticed her equipment were both miraculously back in their holsters, which was very handy and also very indicative of the paranaturality of the event. It wasn't the main focus. Polaris' crystals were spinning over a house some distance ahead, undoubtedly Emily's destination. Just by looking at it she had a strong feeling of anxiety, and she heard a whisper all around her: we have to find it and take it back, Dyl. 

It was a kid's voice, slightly feminine. And the mention of Dyl…

Is this Jesse? Emily thought.

Polaris agreed.

Is she here?

She denied, and Emily nodded, not even disappointed. It would've been too good to be true, anyway.

The house was simple. Its exterior was now a sickly, stained yellow, its once pristine windows were dull and cracked. Mounds of dead grass and bushes littered the property, except on the perimeter immediately around the house, a perfect circle clinically purged of any remnants of life. Emily’s instruments pointed at even higher peaks of paranatural forces inside, and of course they would, that was the house of the Fadens, it was a focal point.

She took a pebble and threw it through one of the holes on the windows, watching for any paranatural reaction. When nothing happened, she got a handful of dead grass and threw it inside the lifeless perimeter. Nothing seemed to matter to it, so instant vaporization was discarded. Good. She just had to access a couple more properties and determine if that was an ongoing effect and if it was a threat. If it wasn't anything immediately fatal, she could risk going inside the house for an hour or two. 

After everything was verified, Emily took a deep breath and walked inside. A deep wave of sadness hit her immediately, along with echoes of voices all around her: Dylan. They got him. It’s all my— They got him— Jesse!! Help me! Jesse! Please!  

It was heartbreaking, hearing the Faden siblings as kids and their despair. Still, she expected something like it, after that episode near the other house. She just had to remain rational about it. Another step: Did you see Neil?! H-he— what happened to him?! I don’t know, but he, he got stuck in there as well… And another: Jess, dad’s car is still here! And mom’s as well!  What?! But they didn’t... There’s no breakfast! Maybe they went out to buy some?

Emily got to the kitchen and started hearing the clatter of forks and knives, morning chatter between adults - who she believed to be Jesse’s and Dylan’s parents - and smelling pancakes. In the living room, a modest place with a trashed couch and a tube TV,  she heard the opening theme for what seemed to be a kid series and kids cheering. There were building blocks and character figurines on the floor, probably belonging to the Faden siblings. Their children toys…

Dylan! Give me Batman back! I know you got it! Play with the girl dolls! I’ll play with whatever I want! I’ll make Barbie kick Batman’s ass! What?! But that’s wrong! He’s a superhero and she’s… a girl! So what? I’m a girl and I’ll kick your ass!

She could see a faint impression of children ghosts - their ghosts, probably - sitting on the floor where the toys were, gesturing towards each other. Hearing them bicker over silly childish things like this made Emily smile, even if it was bittersweet.

I wish they can regain this levity in the future, Emily thought to herself, feeling her heart warm and sting at the same time. I’d love to see them bickering over petty things again.

Polaris spun in Emily’s view, bringing a feeling of comfort and agreement. Familiarity, even. Did she see scenes like those before Jesse and Dylan were separated? They must've been adorable kids...

Again, Polaris agreed. Emily giggled. Let's go see their bedroom.

Chaos was the word that best described it, and it had nothing to do with the erosion the house suffered over the years. Blankets were flung off the beds and to the floor, one pillow was somehow resting atop the desk on the side and clothes were hanging everywhere, even on top of a discarded broom by the door. On each of the two beds, a red-headed child turned to face Emily and smiled: a girl and a boy with piercing blue eyes, Jesse and Dylan. They disappeared as soon as Emily made sense of what she was seeing, but left her with the certainty she was in the right place.

They were so small… Emily thought, and Polaris gave her a sense of agreement, of bittersweetness and also sadness. She, better than anyone, knew all they've been through; she was there with them, incorporeal but influential, trying to guide them through the paths she believed would be the best for them. Emily wondered if Polaris ever wanted to manifest in order to help the siblings, if she even could do such a thing; she probably couldn't, or thing's would've been different, right? Beginning by the abduction of Dylan - there was no way she'd just let it happen. 

Emily walked through the bedroom intently, studying the clothes and toys littering the floor with the same curiosity she had for altered items: she was running possibilities for their tastes at their age, smiling as she saw a book on dinosaurs on the desk. She had books on them when she was a kid as well, but they were way more advanced than those. She stopped and opened it, skimmed through the pages. It was so colorful, friendly and cute, she would've loved to have something this warm and age-appropriate. She'd treasure it. 

This isn't about me, though… She shook her head. Polaris immediately let her know it was okay if she wanted to talk more about it, and Emily opened a small, sad smile, and let her shoulders drop. Thanks, but… It would serve for nothing right now. I better focus on the task at hand.

Polaris agreed, but the warmth that lingered around Emily a bit longer was her way of saying she cared about whatever she had to say on the matter. It was reassuring, even if it couldn't remove old scars. 

Emily stopped between both of the kids' beds, eyes fixed on the floor. She crouched and pulled a couple of sheets of paper half hidden below the nightstand, and noticed two drawings made with crayons, similar in their childish style and simplicity: one of what looked like brown creatures with lots of pointy teeth going against something Emily couldn't really comprehend except for the writing above it: Neil the super dog . The second drawing was of two stick figures with red hair, one with two piggies and a speech bubble over it with the words help us inside, and they were looking at a sort of poorly drawn blue circle. There was a name above it: Polaris .

Look, it’s you! Emily smiled. When Polaris appeared right after, it felt like she’d be smiling if she could, too.

It’s over, Dylan. We’re safe. They— They vanished, right? You saw it! But where are mom and dad, Jess? Why aren’t they back? I don’t know...

Child Jesse and Dylan had failing voices, like they'd been crying. It was so sad to hear them… Emily tried to center herself on the fact that this was a long time ago, and she knew how things turned out: not the best, considering how much the Bureau screwed them over, but she was sure they'd be reunited soon. Jesse would never give up on having Dylan by her side and Emily was determined to help her. They deserved it, more than anyone.

She got up on her feet and placed the drawings on the nightstand. Only then she noticed there was a third drawing stuck to the first, she needed a bit of sleight of hand to untuck it without ripping a chunk of it apart.

As soon as Emily set eyes on this drawing a very strong vertigo hit her. It was a drawing of Jesse and her piggies, a door and a person Emily couldn't really identify - but it kinda looked like they had blonde hair? - with a couple of hearts around it.

Found you! Jesse's voice echoed in Emily's head, and the vertigo stopped immediately - at the same time her attention was drawn to the opening door. There, Jesse - adult, low-profile, reserved Jesse - stood with a simple black shirt and jeans, hair tied back in the usual way, nothing screaming anything terrible could be happening to her. Her eyes found Emily's on the other side of the room and she opened an awkward, a bit restrained, but genuinely relieved smile. It was the kind of shy smile Emily got used to seeing, and it was so much a part of her version of Jesse it made her heart skip a beat to see it again. 

"You made it." Jesse was reverent in her words, her eyes sparkled in excitement. "You really came!"

"Of course I did, I wouldn't just leave you!" Emily scoffed like the very notion was absurd, looked away and then back at Jesse. She started walking in her direction at quick steps. "Listen, the Report—"

Jesse met her halfway, and took her by the hand. "I've got to take you to Dylan." 

"Dylan? He's here?!" Emily's head was running possibilities like crazy. Polaris got equally agitated at the mention.

"Not here here , I came here to get you." Jesse took a glance at Emily like she'd understand what she was talking about, but there was clearly information missing. "But you'll see. We just have to get out."

Easily enough, she led Emily through the door and they stepped out - but suddenly they were outside again, in the square in front of the public school, and a scrawny kid was looking at them with a very annoyed expression.

Polaris pulsed so strongly against Emily's whole being she almost lost her footing. 

"What were you doing?" The boy grunted. "It took you so long!"

Jesse, unaware of what happened by her side with Emily, just chuckled and crossed her arms. "Oh yeah, baby brother, I know you love me so much you can't stand ten minutes without me."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. And you are Pope?" He looked Emily up and down. His eyes, like Jesse's, had that piercing quality that could easily make people recoil, and that remained even if he looked like a ten-year-old boy. "I expected more, with how much Jesse talks about you. She doesn't shut up, it's annoying!"

"Well excuse me, your majesty, I can't help it if my friend is a badass!" Jesse grinned and pushed him lightly. He rolled his eyes.

"N-nice to meet you, Dylan." Emily was still tumbling a bit, but she tried to be friendly while juggling Polaris' energy surge and her own surprise at his age. Luckily, seeing all sorts of weird things in the Bureau helped her a lot in keeping a hold on her reactions.

"You're only here because my sister wants it," he said, unimpressed. "If you do anything to our home—"

"Dylan, we talked about this." Jesse gave him a sharp look.

"No, you did. You kept saying how you could feel echoes of her searching or whatever, and how you'd love if she could be here with us and I should give her a chance. Bah." He threw his hands in the air and turned his back to them, walking away and kicking pebbles. 

Jesse sighed. "Excuse him. He… Isn't used to people anymore."

"It's understandable." Emily nodded, watching as he disappeared in the distance.

"Well, in other news…" Jesse opened her arms and a smile. "Welcome to our place!"

Chapter Text

Emily thought Jesse was referring to Ordinary or her old house with her choice of words. Admittedly, it was odd to see her being so cheerful about a place that brought her so much sorrow, even calling it home, but they were in an alternate reality. Since Polaris was twinkling in her view like she was made of actual stars and sending waves of joy that merged with Emily's own exhilaration, it was safe to say that was the right Jesse, so maybe she was affected by that reality as well? The city around them was remarkably well-kept. Maybe it was never lost in the first place? She didn't have a lot of time to ponder, though. Jesse once again took her by the hand and dragged her on a walk, a "quick tour", as she put it. 

"I didn't think it was real when I noticed you first, you know? " Jesse said as they crossed an empty parking lot. "I thought I'd fallen asleep and dreamt of you in a kitchen, but there was a power outage and we had only a lantern. I was so happy to see you, I could kiss you." She chuckled.

Emily's eyebrows rose, but she was able to at least keep her expression neutral. Jesse was definitely talking about the first reality Emily arrived in - the reality where the corresponding Jesse actually kissed her and said it was a feeling that took her. Was her Jesse really responsible, even if she didn't seem to know it? That choice of idiom...

"We're here!" Jesse announced, pointing at what must’ve been a basketball field at some point in the previous century, by its deplorable state. "Sports field. We build it properly when we decide what we'll play for the day. Ah, by the way - if Dylan asks you to play dodgeball, refuse. He'll try to be mean to you. Now, let's go!"

This time, when Jesse dragged her to the next destination, Emily was more prepared for it. She had time to look around and realize she never saw that part of the town before. "Why doesn't Dylan like me?"

Jesse didn't miss a beat to answer, so she probably had considered it before. "He's jealous. He's never seen me… Well… Have a friend before." She shrugged.

"Oh." Emily felt a warm fuzzy feeling in her chest hearing that, and her rational side was screaming at such a ridiculous display of emotion. She could almost hear it saying Really, Emily? Just because she called you a friend? Well, Emily didn't have all that many friends for a start, and befriending someone as walled-up as Jesse? It was a big deal. She liked her enormously. "Oh Jesse, I'm honored!"

Jesse looked back over her shoulder to Emily, and she had an almost comic frown. "What? Why?"

"That you consider me a friend, of course!"

"I'd be mad if I didn't!" Jesse gestured around and turned away, but Emily thought she could see a small blush in her cheeks before it. "Don’t you think you coming here is kind of a big deal? I do."

She didn't elaborate further, but Emily had a sense she was talking about her journey, and if she knew about it, despite not being aware of Emily most of the time… "Did you also hop through other realities on your way here?" Emily asked.

"What?" Jesse lowered her pace, almost stopped, but decided against it. "No, I've always been here."

Polaris appeared in Emily's view retracting her prisms to the borders, spinning cautiously. There was a clear sense of alarm there.

Yes, I agree. Emily thought. She's being affected by this place.

"Always? So where did we meet?" Emily made sure to match Jesse's speed for once, so she could give her a pointed look accompanied by a little smartass smile.

"I, uh…" Jesse really stopped this time. She looked unsure. "We… Did you come here on a research trip? Well, it doesn't matter, does it?" She picked both of Emily's hands. "C'mon, let me show you Dylan's favorite place!"

—

They were in front of an Arcade. It had a big neon depiction of an arcade machine on its sign, followed by rounded letters formed by layers of pink neon tubes. One could see inside the place through the glass double doors, and there were rows upon rows of screens shining through the black lights all round them, trying to catch the eye. The place looked like it was sliced right out of the 80s and placed in the middle of the town - especially because there wasn't supposed to be such a place in Ordinary. 

The hairs on the back of Emily's neck stood up by the mere sight of it. It gave her a weird impression, like the haze one gets when they're barely awake. 

"Isn't it cool? I think I saw it in Minnesota once," Jesse commented. "It has all the games we used to play on our old consoles! Dylan loved Super Mario World. I was more of a Street Fighter girl - and I still kick his ass with Cammy!" She puffed her chest like she was very proud of the feat. Unfortunately, not only did Emily not know much in the realm of games, but her interest was piqued by a different part of Jesse's story.

"And how did it get here?" Emily tilted her head. "The Arcade, I mean. If it was in Minnesota."

"I made it," Jesse said simply, like it was obvious.

"You… made it. " Emily parroted, jaw agape. "How?"

"To the best of my memory, of course. I knew Dylan would like it."

"Are you implying this instance of Ordinary is fabricated by your memory as well?"

Jesse creased her brow. "Ordinary? We're not… I'll show you. Yeah, it'll be better this way."

Emily was expecting to be yanked somewhere by the hand one more time, but Jesse simply came up to her, swept her off her feet and took the impulse to levitate to the roof of the closest house. From there she jumped to a two storey house and then a three storey building on the other side of the street. A decent part of the city was visible from there, and it was only then that Emily understood why Jesse said they weren't in Ordinary: maybe the city had been used as a base, and filled with the most varied building blocks from all over… Well, everywhere, if Emily had to guess. She could see a big, retro movie theater that could've been in Vegas, a bowling alley with a flying saucer on top of it, a small lake in the central area of the city with a carnival by it… Everything was glaringly out of place and yet it worked somehow.

"How did all of those get here?" Emily whispered, more as a personal note.

"I don't know, they just did." Jesse shrugged.

“Where are we really?” Emily turned to her. “I’ve been to some alternate realities, but none of them could do anything remotely like this. I don’t think any place outside of the Oldest House—”

"Hey you two losers! What the hell are you doing up there?!" 

Dylan was back, shouting from the street below with his high-pitched child voice. Jesse rolled her eyes and suppressed a groan, putting a hand on her knee to help with getting up. 

"And why are you here? Weren't you oh-so-annoyed you walked away, Dylan?" Jesse stood at the edge of the building with her arms crossed, looking down at her brother like she was some sort of superhero. "Or are the tales true and you do love me this much?!" She laughed.

Dylan made a grimace with his tongue sticking out. "Eugh, no! I just came to see if you and your girlfriend are hungry! Weirdo..."

Jesse looked back over her shoulder to Emily. "Are you hungry?"

As it was often the case, Emily got so caught up in the events that she forgot to take stock of herself. She had just had lunch at her father's house, and the satiation apparently didn't vanish from an alternate reality to the other; There was a field of permanence within her person, which was good. Running around with Jesse had made Emily thirsty, though, and a bit tired.

"No, but I bet you are." She smiled. 

Jesse smiled back. "You're very right."

—

The carnival was deserted that time of the day, but the food stands were open. Each one of them had their snacks on display at an arm's length, steaming hot, looking and smelling wonderful. No one was around, though, and food usually didn't make itself. Or did it? Jesse and Dylan looked largely unbothered as they grabbed whichever they wanted from the counters, but Emily kept trying to see if she could spot someone - anyone - around the food court, or further inside the stands. Much like Ordinary before it, there was no one. Unlike it, though, was the feeling it was okay like that, which unsettled Emily more than the other option. Empty places were supposed to feel unnerving, ominous, dangerous even. She didn't see a soul besides the Fadens since she walked in that patchwork town with Jesse, and yet it felt right, like that was how it was supposed to be. How could that be the truth, when there were billions of people in the world?

The trio eventually settled on one of the tables that lined the pier, and while Jesse devoured her huge sandwich with a lot of ketchup on it, Dylan started picking at the seeds on his bun and throwing them at her. Emily took that time to produce a small evidence bag from her inner pocket and snatched a french fry from Jesse's pack. She put it inside the bag, closed it and put it in a different inner pocket in her coat. She'd love to analyze it later, see if there was anything different going on with this extraplanar snack. 

By the time she was done, Jesse had thrown a piece of lettuce coated in mayonnaise on Dylan's hair, and now he was trying to rub it on hers. 

Emily blinked a couple of times when she saw them, though, trying to process the sight. Dylan was no longer a kid, but a teenager between 14 and 16, she couldn't pinpoint his age exactly. Still, it was baffling; how did that happen? He was a child a second before!

They weren't paying attention to her, so they didn't see her gape at them. Dylan almost climbed on the table trying to untangle his wrists from Jesse's grasp - failing miserably - and she teased him further, saying how she was stronger and he had no way to surpass her janitor’s assistant muscles. They were locked in a dance of subjugation that made them stand up and wrestle closer to the edge of the pier, and they only stopped at the questionably low railing. Even then, only barely; they squirmed dangerously towards the lake and back.

"C'mon Jesse, your choice: water or lettuce!" It was Dylan's time to tease, as he kept pulling his hands towards the water, in hopes it would make his sister falter and let go of him, and in the best scenario, even trip and fall into the lake.

"Thanks but none!" Jesse grinned, and put a foot in the right place at the right time for Dylan to trip and take a glorious fall. The betrayal in his eyes was priceless as Jesse let go of him, and the splash in the water? Even more so.

"Ha!" Jesse put a hand on her waist and turned back to face Emily, a cocky grin on her face. "He had no chan—"

The railing behind her exploded, and Dylan jumped out of the water like a shark in one of the very inaccurate and detrimental movies that depicted them as killing machines, grabbed Jesse and jumped back in the lake.

Everything was silent once more. Emily stared at the water with her jaw dropped once more.

They're okay, right?!  

A second later both siblings resurfaced and started trading playful slaps, then throwing water at each other, and Emily let the tension she was holding drop.

"How dare you Dylan, I won fair and square!" Jesse laughed, and put an arm up to defend herself from an incoming wave of water.

"Fair?! You made me fall so you could show off to your girlfriend!" He boo-ed. "You're so lame!"

"You talk so much about Emily I'm starting to think you got a crush!" she fired back. 

"Shut up you idiot!"

It was funny to watch them. They were trying so hard to bicker and fight but they couldn't hide their smiles or keep the laughter from their words. It was adorable.

Then Emily noticed something. Jesse looked… Younger. It could be because she wasn't worried, frowning or focused - and seeing her so carefree was a heartwarming treat - but it looked like her features were aged down, no, scratch that— she definitely looked like a teenager, just like Dylan. What was going on? How could they do that? Were they aware of it? Would they panic if she asked? Did the possibility of them turning into babies and disappearing exist? Hell, Emily didn't think she was well equipped to deal with a Benjamin Button situation. How should she proceed?

Well, Jesse seems to be less prone to freaking out than any of us. I'll ask her when they're back up here. 

That was something she could work with. "Hey you two, you're going to freeze down there!" Emily shouted at the siblings, a snicker and a nice smile at the ready. 

"Okay, mom!" Dylan replied in a sarcastic note, and Jesse immediately hit him in the mouth with water. He had to switch between coughing and cursing after that.

"Why don't you join us?" Jesse tried casually, but Dylan groaned hard and made her glare at him before coming back to Emily.

"Me? Pfft. I wouldn't last a second." Emily shook her head. "I'm going to find you some towels, okay? Be right back."

“Why do that? Jesse’s dying for you to see her coming out of the lake like in one of those ads—”

Jesse shoved Dylan’s head underwater.

Chapter Text

(...) Jesse is heavily affected by the mental influence brought by alternate reality travelling. She's been confused and in denial when presented with facts from her native reality, and I believe there's a correlation between the amount of time she spent here and the strength of her stubbornness. I will find ways to keep  introducing facts from our reality and observe what seems to get through to her and what doesn't.

Dylan is a mystery. I don't know if he's aware of his situation and the place we are in, if he knows of these same things in regards to our reality, or even if he's really okay, and not just projecting a state he'd like to be true. What I do know, though, is that he seems to be jealous of my friendship with Jesse, he likes to try and tease her saying we're girlfriends, and he'll be mean to me if we ever get to play dodgeball (I wholeheartedly hope we won't get to that, I shiver thinking back to my results in PE in high school)

Jesse and Dylan also exhibit the ability to modify their age, although whether or not that's a conscious manifestation on their part is still inconclusive. 

Emily wrote a few more lines in her notes after she got a hold of some soft, fluffy, thick towels. Once more she didn't find anyone when she went inside the store, but it was open and welcoming, so she took her chances. If the Faden siblings, who had been here for days, picked up all the food they wanted with no repercussions, she could probably get some toiletries in peace. Which brought another question: If they really were the only ones around, why did the town look so much like it was inhabited when they weren't looking? After all, the food was warm and fresh when they got it, the stores were open when they passed by, and Emily assumed the rides in the carnival wouldn't just start by themselves - though she was eager to put that to the test that night if she could. Was there a possibility that there were people in the city, and they couldn't see them because they were at incompatible frequencies? Emily hadn’t forgotten how Jesse took her out of an Ordinary of shades and memories to bring her to this place. Maybe they overlapped somehow, and there was yet another level where its inhabitants resided? Were they the same as the ones in the original town of Ordinary? Because if they were—

"Hey Em, is everything alright over there? I thought you lost yourself or something!"

Emily jumped at the sudden sound of Jesse's voice over the soft background noise. She whipped back to see her completely soaked at the door to the store, still a teenager, looking at her with genuine curiosity. She didn't give a damn at the hair sticking all over her face, or to the water pooling at her feet at an alarming rate. Just by looking at her, Emily felt soggy.

"Good lord, Jesse!" Emily threw one of the towels at her. It fell to the ground nowhere near Jesse.

"You really need those thirty hours of training, huh?" Jesse laughed.

Emily's heart tightened. She remembered Jesse saying that some time before, in a similar situation, the night when the Report got altered. Did Jesse remember that?

"Well you can grab it yourself!" Emily shook her head and pouted. 

"Sure!" Jesse grinned, and made the towel fly directly to her hand in the blink of an eye. "What were you daydreaming about?"

"I don't—" seeing how Jesse gave her an unconvinced look, Emily scoffed. "I was considering possibilities, okay? And how are you a teenager all of a sudden?"

Jesse shrugged, and started drying her hair with the towel. "It happens. Today I woke up as a 6 year-old, made a whole Lego town with Dylan. He threw my horse ranch into the lake, I think. It was definitely very far away." She snickered.

"And that doesn't bother you?" Emily frowned.

"What he did? Oh yeah, I tackled him and we rolled down the street. I had to patch his knee after because it was all scraped up, but at least he learned his lesson!"

The mental image the narration conjured in Emily's mind was of two kids rolling down a hill, and she would've been worried if Jesse wasn't so relaxed about it. "That's amusing, but I meant the age change. How does it work? Do you only change externally or do your minds change to a more age-appropriate mindset as well? How would it even know?"

"Emily, you think way too much." Now that Emily was close, Jesse threw the towel at her. It wasn't a quick throw, but even then Emily almost didn't catch it in time. "It happens, it's not an issue. I bet it could even happen to you!"

"How?" Emily raised an eyebrow, and threw the towel back at Jesse. She wasn't anywhere near dry yet, after all.

“I don’t have a clue." Jesse looked back at herself and hesitated. "I should probably change out of these."

"You should. I'll go give this to Dylan." Emily nodded towards the remaining towels and started heading out. 

"Wait."

Jesse put a hand on her shoulder as she passed by. Emily turned to face her, and Jesse suddenly blushed and looked down to the floor.

"Thanks. For being here. I missed you." 

Emily would’ve hugged Jesse in a heartbeat upon hearing that, but the fact she was still soaked to the bones made her pause and decide against it. What she did was put her own free hand over Jesse's and held it for a moment.

Not as much as I missed you , she thought.

Polaris spun softly on her vision.

"You'll stay with us, won't you?" Jesse's head suddenly whipped up, with worry in her expression. If Emily knew her, it was worse under the surface.

"I—"

"At least for the night? C'mon, I want to show you the rides in the carnival!" 

"Jesse—"

"Please?"

Emily bit her lip. She was there to take them back. She didn’t know what the effect of staying could be; at the very least she’d have her memories suppressed, which she did have a plan to counter, but… It was still dangerous. Her heart was trying to take over, and she was painfully aware of what it was trying to nudge her towards. Yes, of course she wanted it. What she wanted was irrelevant in the situation, though - wasn’t it?

Then there was Jesse, and the plea in her eyes. She was reserved in her displays of emotion even as a teenager but the glint of hope was real in her eyes, as was the fidgeting with the hem of her shirt. She was anxious. They both were.

Ugh, I hate having emotions!

"Sure, I'll stay. I want to know how those rides move, anyway." Emily smiled softly. "But after that we have to go, the three of us."

"Where?"

"To our reality, of course." It was a gamble. Emily saw the opportunity and took it, but there was no way of knowing if Jesse would just deny it or brush it aside like before.

Jesse frowned. She stared at Emily for a whole moment, going from an uncomfortable to a confused expression and back. "You mean like we are right now?" She smiled, incredulous but at the same time certain of something. "I think you've been working too much, Em, it's getting to your head. Why don't you change out of these clothes, for a start? They can't be comfortable all the time."

Emily looked down and acknowledged she was still in her FBC uniform - just in case it might've transformed into something else - then shook her head. "I'm fine like this, thanks, and no I'm not having delirious thoughts caused by exhaustion, Jesse—"

"Eeh, I'm going to grab some clothes for myself, then," Jesse interrupted, stretching and heading further inside. "I'm super cold!"

Emily watched her go with her lips pressed in a tight line. She's still resisting, even with a more direct approach. Maybe I can gather some information with Dylan.

—

Dylan was floating peacefully in the water when Emily got back to the lake. With that lost, inscrutable expression, he looked a lot more like his older self. Emily didn't know if that was a good thing.

She made herself known and offered him a towel, but he stated he'd be in the water for a bit longer. They stood in silence, then, and it was nice. Peaceful. Emily sat with her legs dangling from the pier, boots barely grazing the water, and she realized how beautiful the place was. 

At least they look happy and safe, she thought. If they really are, that is.

"We are safe," Dylan mumbled, and it made Emily jump; she forgot about him for a second. "Why do you keep being an ass about it? It's our home! We didn't go to your home and start listing the ways it's wrong and we have to leave!"

Emily's eyes widened, and she got her notepad almost automatically. "Did you just read my mind?"

"No." Dylan stopped floating to be able to look at her. "Why would you think that?"

"Because you just reacted to a thought I had."

He frowned. "No, you mumbled it. I heard it."

That's definitely not what happened. Can you hear this now?

There was no reaction on Dylan's part, he looked like he was still waiting for her reply on the matter.

Huh.

"Well, what matters is you heard it, and I'm sorry I insulted your home. I never saw a place like this."

"And then you just assumed it was evil and dangerous because you didn't understand it!"

Emily had to admit he had a point. She was trained to assume every paranatural force was dangerous until proven otherwise, which was largely taught in the Bureau. It probably kept many people from doing lousy jobs and getting hurt, sure, but as a scientist Emily tried to keep her mind open to possibilities. She didn't do that since she crossed that door from the Faden's old bedroom into this new, exquisite patchwork. She assumed it was having a harmful effect on Jesse and making her forget, but the same thing happened to Emily in the other dimension and it hadn’t been some evil warlord's realm, but her father's apartment. It could just be an inherent effect. It was possible they were in a more malleable reality right now, and that caused their ‘home’ to change like that, with their will. Wouldn't she want to stay as well, if it was a mix of her favorite places in the world, with her favorite people?

"You're right," she muttered, then cleared her throat and spoke in a higher, clearer tone. "I'm sorry. I… I was blinded."

"Eh. At least you admit it." Dylan shrugged, and started floating again. It seemed he wasn't bothered to keep the conversation anymore.

"It's good to know you're well, though." Emily commented. She looked away, to the horizon. It was blurred by mist and the treelines. "I was looking for you two in a lot of places, and I didn't know what could've happened. I feared it was bad."

"It was, before," Dylan said quietly. "But Jess came. She can do anything."

Emily smiled. "She really can."

There was a faint sound of chimes in the back of Emily's head, a soothing hum that vibrated pleasantly against her skull. She couldn't understand what Polaris was radiating because she felt her far away, but it gave her a sense of familiarity; maybe a hug?

"Okay, I'm back and I brought you clothes, Dylan!" 

Jesse was walking in their direction, bringing a backpack with her. Her clothes were similar to the ones she wore before, jeans, boots and a shirt, although this time it was an Old Gods of Asgard one (they were famous enough that Emily recognized them by name, even if she wasn't that much into their music) with its sleeves and neck hole cut out, to look more rustic. Jesse's hair was still wet, so she let it loose to dry. When she was close enough, Emily immediately noticed she was back to her adult self, and the smile she gave her made her heart flutter in her chest.

Oh for god's sake Jesse, you have no right being this beautiful!

Dylan snickered in the lake behind her. Emily hoped very much he wasn't unintentionally reading her thoughts, like he seemed to do before.

"I hope you didn't bring me any of those ugly dad polo shirts!" he shouted.

"We're siblings, not sworn enemies." Jesse chuckled and put the backpack on the nearest table, taking its contents out. "Here, you can look for yourself."

"Is that green thing a french beanie?"

"Yes. You know where the store is, if you don't like it."

"No, no, that's not…" there was a big splashing sound, and suddenly Emily was hit by water all over her back. She whipped back and saw Dylan floating above her level, almost turning upside down to reach Jesse and the table, dripping water everywhere. "Wow, that's so cool!" He picked up the beanie and turned it in his hands, then put it on. "How do I look?"

"Like a nerd," Jesse replied.

"Try turning it a bit to the side! It's charming!" Emily suggested.

He raised an eyebrow but tried it. "Like this?"

"Yes! You look very nice!" 

Jesse crossed her arms. "Still a nerd. A fashion nerd."

They stood a bit more like that, taking a look at the clothes Jesse brought and having opinions about them. It seemed to be a point of shared interest between Dylan and Emily, to Jesse's amusement and chagrin.

—

The carnival looked like a place out of a dream by nighttime: fairy lights of a myriad of colors glittered along the way, flashy banners and art nouveau posters announced the attractions, happy music merged with the sound of laughter and conversation. There were people here, Emily noticed with both excitement and surprise. People played on the game booths, and left with their prizes. They bought food, crowded the attractions, and waited for their place on the rides. 

A whole new theory started forming in Emily's head, about how people were allowed to manifest at night. She tried to see if she knew anyone, if maybe there was a correlation between the three of them and who was there — but oddly, she realized she couldn't. Every time she tried to focus on specifics about a person — their face, hairstyle, what they were wearing — her eyes slid off of them like they were nothing more than a detail on the scenery. It even happened with the conversations: when she focused on what they were saying the sound faded, and she was left only with the unintelligible background noise.

What the fuck is that, Emily thought, hoping she could reach her guide and passenger. Does it also happen to you? Can you focus on anyone?

Polaris only sent her a faint impression of a negative, something like a whisper. Was she affected by the carnival somehow?

"Where are we going first?!" Dylan asked, turning on his feet so he could see everything around them. "I want to see the house of mirrors, or maybe— oh, OH, I know! The rollercoaster!"

Jesse put a hand on her chin and hummed. "Why don't we let Emily decide? She's the newcomer!"  

There was a fire-eating and fire juggling act happening on a circular stage on the patio they were on. While most people were gathered near the event, Jesse, Dylan and Emily were on the side, just considering their options. Jesse and Dylan were teenagers — Jesse reverted from her adult self some time after they decided they’d actually go to the carnival — and as pesky as people that age could be, they ended up convincing Emily to put on some casual clothes. "Yeah, sure, it'll be very cool to go to a place where you have fun with work clothes, Emily," Jesse had said, and rolled her eyes. She had a point: as much as Emily loved her office clothes, they weren't exactly appropriate for a night like this. So she went to the store where she got the towels and made do with what she could find: which left her wearing a loose shirt over a black tank top, a jacket with a hood and washed jeans with boots. A modest look, but nice and comfy, just as intended. 

"Well, I haven't been to many carnivals, I always get a little lost," Emily commented. "What are those people?"

"People, duh." Dylan shrugged. "They're annoying, loud and they don't matter— now, rollercoaster, can we go?"

"Dylan!" Jesse crossed her arms.

"Sure, we can go there, but you have to tell me about these people after" Emily hurried to say. She didn't have any specific ride in mind, so why not? "Then it's Jesse's turn to choose."

"Heh, I'm going to like this." Dylan grinned.

—

It wasn't a big roller coaster, like something you'd expect from a proper amusement park. It was rather compact, wooden and simple, with its structure exposed. No crazy twists and loops, only spirals. There was a two people per row limit in the carts, and Dylan dragged Jesse to the first ones.

"C'mon Jess, we're wild, we're cool!" He sat down on the second row and had her sit by his side, grinning. "We're not like your weak-ass girlfriend who's too baby for the ride!"

"Dylan what the fuck," Jesse punched him on the shoulder. "You've been terrible to her the whole day, let it go!"

"Ouch!" He replied with a punch of his own, and they started to exchange slaps and kicks — it pretty much turned into a regular sibling fight, and soon they were snickering and cursing through it.

Emily passed by them while they were distracted and sat in the first row, right in the same spot Dylan was sitting in the row behind. She took a glance back — Jesse towered over him and subjugated him with relentless tickling, and Dylan cowered and begged her to stop.

"Are you going to apologize?!" Jesse asked, commanding, while she found a spot on his side unguarded and ready to tickle.

"Yeow!" Dylan jumped on his seat and tried to get out of her reach, to no avail. "I— I can't really— stop! Please!"

"You can let him go, Jesse." Emily was very amused with their display. She was an only child, but even she had to admit that was peak sibling energy. "It's alright."

"Are you sure?" Jesse looked from Dylan to Emily. "This idiot needs to learn some manners…"

"Yeah mom, whatever you say," he mocked. Jesse pointed at him as if it just proved her point further, and Emily smiled.

"I am." Emily nodded, and went back to sitting straight on the bench as an employee just came to lower and lock the lap bar. Dylan and Jesse had to follow her lead and behave so their own bar could be locked in place, and it was only then that Emily spoke again. "Besides, if Dylan is right and I'm indeed too soft for this ride, I might end up vomiting and it's going to fly back on the poor person behind me…"

"What?!" Dylan shouted, indignant.

Jesse laughed. "Oh she got you, bro!"

"That's not fucking—" The train started moving, a steady mechanical sound coming from the chain that was transporting it. "No!"

The train started ascending the lift hill, and Jesse was still laughing in Dylan's face. Emily savored her success only for a moment before the fact she really was in the first row of the train hit her; her chest tightened with anticipation with every noise the chain made as it pulled the train up the hill, and she had to hold a firmer grasp on her breath. Sure, she'd been to rollercoasters before, she knew this one was very tame compared to others, but the moments preceding the drop were always the anxious ones, and she had the VIP seat to watch it unfold.

She didn't want to think too much about how it would look like she was going to free fall before the moment actually came. It was best to look around as they ascended and see all of the carnival; it was a constellation of glimmering lights, colorful and vibrant against the very common atmosphere of the rest of the town. It looked like a dream in the middle of the mundane, child-like wonder in stark contrast with the harsh reality of a concrete wall. No wonder the Fadens were so excited to come.

The train reached the top of the hill. For a moment, nothing happened; Emily kept looking around to the other parts of the city because she knew she'd get sick if she stared at the fall. 

Then, with a whoosh, the train dropped. It was impossible not to look as the train shot down the tracks like a bullet, pressing everyone into their seats as their insides felt like they were all trying to pile up and back inside their bodies. The turns came: left, right, left, right, spiraling as they kept going down, far faster than Emily would've thought from looking at the ride before. It was exciting and terrifying, and much like the screams from everyone else, she couldn't separate where one stopped and the other began.

The background to the downward spiral was a blur of darkness and carnival lights, but it suddenly shifted to rocks somehow, like they were in a cave. Emily blinked, and a bunch of sand — sand!? — hit her  face. The wall of rocks opened to bright white light, and all of a sudden they were in an enormous, well lit cave of greys, reds and endless black shaped as a monolith.

"What the fuck!?" Emily shouted. That's the Crossroads! 

She barely heard Dylan laughing over the wind and her racing thoughts. There was no way they were in the Foundation, so what was it she was seeing, exactly? An illusion? The tracks turned down — always down — and to the left, and they entered one of the smaller tunnels, passing around crystal formations that grew dangerously close. Then, without warning the tracks went up, and the train literally broke through stone and into a place made of an endless white horizon, speckled with floating chunks of cave and perfectly-cut black marble structures. For the first time Emily felt sick, like suddenly her inner side was expanding and her outside was compacting and she could either turn inside out or simply explode like a balloon because of it. She gasped for air and couldn't find it — Polaris flared in her vision with urgency, and she felt the effects recede to the point she could breathe again, but her thoughts were all scrambled. What— —

"Don't try to think!" Jesse shouted from behind her.

She decided to follow the advice, and watched as they passed by marble structures bisected by cave rock, turned around crystals cracking once perfectly cut black surfaces and went up, red dust flying in the train’s wake.

They entered another one of the foundation's tunnels. This one got darker as they gained distance from the astral bleed. Emily felt it in her whole body when they crossed back to a less alien plane of existence — the pressure was completely gone, her thoughts flew unimpeded once more, no one was going to explode.

They were in complete darkness for a moment, and in the next, there was a night sky and an explosion of colorful lights around them. They were back at the Carnival, and after a few more ups and turns and downs, the train docked safely on the station, signaling the end of the run. The indiscernible people got out of their cars, some chatting, some cheering, some even wobbly and sick from the ride. Dylan emerged from his car with a hop and a huge smile, looking genuinely happy. Jesse went out right after him, in the more traditional way.

"Man, I love this ride," he said, stretching, then turned to look at his sister. "You look like a tornado hit you."

She frowned and started trying to tame her hair to a more agreeable state. "Shit!"

Emily got out of her car with her legs shaking, but she made a point of standing up and walking to the Fadens to the best of her capabilities. Dylan gasped and laughed as soon as he noticed her approach. Jesse's eyes got wide.

"Emily!" Jesse dashed to her, grabbing her by the shoulders just in time to prevent a dangerous tilt to the side. Emily's head spun, she leaned further in, losing her balance, and in the brief second she didn't look, teenager Jesse was back at being adult Jesse, holding her in her arms for support before she really fell. Seeing her back to her correct age was a relief, like at least something was familiar in the middle of all that. "Let's sit you down, okay? Take a little breath."

Jesse took Emily to one of the benches that lined the edge of the station and helped her sit down. Dylan went with them and observed. He looked more curious than worried or amused by the situation, and Emily wished he wouldn't talk until the buzzing in her ears stopped, but she wasn't that lucky.

"You look like a ghost but I gotta give it to you, you endured the whole ride… Did you like it?" He spoke with just a hint of surprise in his voice. Apparently, Dylan's curiosity trumped his usual grumpiness.

"It was very… Unexpected." Emily pinched the bridge of her nose and whimpered with how her head spun. She felt ill. Thankfully it was better than before, but…

"Heh, I bet it was!" Dylan laughed and she flinched with the pain it caused — it felt like needles piercing her brain.

"Shhhh, Dylan! She's still feeling bad from the astral plane!" Jesse chastised in whispers, then turned back to Emily. "Sorry, I didn't know it would affect you this hard…"

It shouldn't, Emily thought, even under all that strain. She'd been to the astral collisions in the Foundation when they had been down there solving the crisis. They certainly exerted some odd influence over the senses until one spent a couple of minutes in them, but it was never anywhere this drastic. Maybe the fact she went in at high speed in a sinuous roller coaster track had something to do with it; just maybe.

"Hey Dylan, can you get us some water?” Jesse asked. “I think it might help."

He raised an eyebrow, but nodded. "Yeah, sure. It would be worse to have your girlfriend sick — you'd want to take care of her. Ew." He turned his back to them and walked to the exit completely unbothered, hands in his pockets. 

Jesse rolled her eyes. "Ugh, he's insufferable when he's jealous. Sorry." She watched as he disappeared in the exit and gave it a moment more before she turned back to Emily, with her eyes sparkling with excitement. "So, you got Polaris here with you!"

"I thought you knew that from the start..." Emily arched her brow. Pain pierced her head once more because of the movement, but it was manageable. "She was the one who went to fetch me, actually."

"Really?" Jesse looked surprised, then a little moved. "We had a fight, she's been silent for days. I didn't think she would… Oh, Polaris…" 

Polaris spun around Jesse, and Emily was sure they both could see her there, by the way Jesse's expression brightened as they started their silent conversation. Emily looked away, feeling like she was intruding on them even if she couldn't hear what they said. It was good, not having to focus; it eased the pain a bit.

"Emily?" Jesse called, and Emily turned slowly to look at her. "Polaris said you got a little out of sync, that's why you're feeling bad. Can I try to ground you?"

"Sure…" 

Jesse approached, putting each hand on a side of Emily's head — a cleansing was coming. Emily closed her eyes, wishing dearly for the soothing presence of the resonance. She wanted to be able to think unimpeded again, and make all the questions that would undoubtedly pop up as soon as that happened.

She could feel Jesse's fingers ghosting her head, and the pleasant vibration that made their way inside as the shining fractals appeared in her closed eyes. She welcomed the sound of chimes as if she very much wanted to dive under its waves and be cradled by the depths — if she was out of sync, what could be better than a guiding star to put her back into alignment?

It didn't take long, and it felt weirdly like popping a bone back into place, only the bone was her own brain. Emily was suddenly very lucid, very aware of everything around her. Before her mind could start running theories at 100%, though, an impression washed over her: happiness at first, but with an aftertaste of sadness and introspection. It faded soon, and she opened her eyes to a Jesse studying her with a curious expression.

“She trusts you,” she said, opening a small, thoughtful smile.

Polaris spun in Emily’s vision to affirm that as well, but there was also an urge there. She trusted her for a reason.

I didn’t forget, Emily thought, and felt something not quite like a nod, but with the intent of one. 

“Why did you two fight?” she asked. “You always sounded so in touch with each other.”

Jesse hesitated visibly. Polaris appeared around her — they were probably discussing what to say — and then Jesse frowned and curled her lips in a grimace, but remembered herself and quickly replaced it with the usual poker face. She didn’t seem to realize Emily could now see both her and her friend/guide/tenant, so she didn't know it was easier to deduce whatever was going on.

“It’s not important.” Jesse finally replied, and Polaris closed in on her head in an uncharacteristically forceful way, making her wince; Emily could feel the entity's disapproval from where she stood. Jesse was disoriented at first, but it quickly changed to one of annoyance, and there was probably another argument going on at the moment, if Emily had to guess.

What happened? Emily asked Polaris.

She replied in the form of an echo of Dylan’s voice: but my sister has always been stubborn—

Suddenly all traces of Polaris’ vanished from the space, making both Jesse and Emily frown and look at each other in confusion. One second after, a bottle of water came flying in Jesse’s direction, and she stopped it midair with her telekinesis.

“There it is loser, fresh for your girlfriend.” Dylan came back, grumpy as usual. He had a slice of pizza on his hand, and was munching on it.

“Oh. Thanks, Dylan.” Emily smiled at him, but he only raised an eyebrow.

“Please get well soon, I don’t want to play babysitter.” He helped Jesse get up, and she immediately punched him on the shoulder once more. "Ouch!"

"Be nice, for fuck's sake!" She finally picked up the floating bottle of water and gave it to Emily.

“Thanks.” Emily took a swig and sighed in relief. She could feel the water going down her throat and to her stomach; she didn’t realize how thirsty she was before. "Don't worry Dylan, I'm already getting better. Do you two think we might hit some game booths before we go on another ride? Just something a little bit tamer before a new reality-defying adventure like this one."

"Sure," Jesse was quick to reply. "I got the perfect one…"

—

There were three cork rifles at the counter along with a bucket full of corks ready for them. Jesse arrived at the shooting gallery booth and grabbed the rifle in the middle unceremoniously, loading it with practiced ease. Dylan let out a surprised gasp followed by an excited one, and ran to his sister's right side. Emily stopped a couple of steps from them both, and she scoffed.

"A shooting range? I've never used a gun in my life!" She looked from them to the targets, and her eyes widened. "They're all pictures of Dr. Darling!"

"The forehead gives the highest score!" Dylan joked. 

"Think of it as an introduction to your 30 hours of training for field work." Jesse gave her an encouraging look and gestured at the rifle by her side. "C'mon, I know you must've wanted to shoot him as well. There are nice prizes!"

Emily couldn't help but think those two last sentences could be wildly misinterpreted out of context, and also that shooting the likeness of her ex-boss was incredibly improper, but at the same time a part of her argued that yes, shooting him would be very cathartic after everything she learned.

Besides, it's not like I'm shooting a real person.

"I'm going to do so bad at this, just you watch." Emily chuckled and finally picked her rifle up, imitating the way the Fadens loaded their own.

"Okay, rules!" Dylan announced. "Everybody gets three shots. Big Darlings yield five points, medium Darlings ten, and small dickhead Darlings give you fifteen. Whoever scores best wins!"

"But there's stuff for everyone, based on your score," Jesse added, looking at Emily like she wanted to assure her it wasn't going to be all bad. It was charming, really, but Emily knew she might end up shooting a cork on a poor blurred-person's head on the other side of the carnival, and she was already apologizing mentally. "Go on, start!"

Emily looked at the range, and the targets were so far away… She tried to mimic the stance she saw rangers use when they deployed rifles, and aimed for one of the bigger Darling plaques, one where he had a confident yet goofy smile on. The gun made a compressed air noise as it shot — but the cork missed the target entirely, and hit the canvas behind the props by a wide mark.

"Well, that was something," she giggled, then shrugged. 

"Could've been worse." Jesse adjusted her stance, aligning her line of sight with the rifle. She shot like a professional - BAM! - straight on a small Darling plaque. It fell back with a dry sound. She smirked.

"Show off!" Dylan cooed. He took his shot and hit a medium-sized plaque that also fell promptly. "You're just trying to impress your girlfriend."

“It’s working.” Emily gave him a somewhat sly smile, which made him groan and Jesse laugh, by extension.

Dylan kept complaining under his breath, but in an unintelligible way. He held the rifle carelessly and shot, hitting a barrel; however, Emily saw him make a quick motion with his free hand and the big plaque on said barrel tumbled and fell.

“Hey!” Both the women shouted.

“I saw that!” Emily pointed to his hand.

Jesse gasped theatrically. “You cheater!”

“What? You t-two are crazy!” he squealed, but the half laughter in his tone betrayed his intentions.

"Oh yeah? Then shoot again. C'mon, you got two more shots — but I'll be watching." Jesse gestured to the booth, then crossed her arms. She was wholly unconvinced. 

"Fiiiine." He dragged his word and himself back to a shooting position, this time taking extra care aiming on a medium-sized target of Darling. He shot it straight on the mouth, and it fell back on the floor with a dry sound. "See! Done. In your face!"

Jesse raised an eyebrow and smiled. "Huh. You can aim."

"Of course I can aim, who do you think I am?" He poked her on the shoulder.

"A baby." Her smile got wider, and before he could answer she was shooting too — right in the middle of a small Darling.

"Fucking ass!" Dylan rolled his eyes and pouted, crossing his arms on a whole display of a childish tantrum. Jesse started laughing at it, which only made him scowl deeper. "At least I'm better than her!" He gestured towards Emily.

"Well, you should consider that's not a very high standard, Dylan." Emily shrugged, giggling at the sibling feud. "I'll demonstrate."

She took her position, aimed on a big Darling and took a breath.

"You have to aim a little—" Jesse started.

"Hey! No helping!" Dylan cut in.

Emily started calculating in her mind. The trajectory, speed, mass of the bullet — and when she noticed what she was doing, she halted and simply pulled the trigger.

The shot missed, but at least this time it passed closer to dr. Darling's excited smirk.

"As predicted." Emily wasn't expecting to hit. Jesse once told her she acted mostly on instinct and reflexes when she was out in the Oldest House. It had always been like that, and it made her a great fighter. Emily was an overthinker; a good trait for a scientist, awful for a marksman. It was fun, though, to get to try for a day without pressure or an imminent threat lurking on the corner. She was sure those would come sooner or later.

"It's just your second time. I think I emptied a whole clip the first time I had to shoot a Hiss and couldn't hit it." Jesse gave her an encouraging look. 

She noticed immediately how Jesse recalled something from their reality and it didn't seem to clash at all in her head with the narrative she'd been repeating about always being there, when both were practically excludent. Emily took a subtle glance at Dylan; he was also unfazed by the mention of the Hiss. What did that tell her about the influence this reality had on them? It was strong, far too strong if it could placate their minds to deeply traumatic things. Of course, if one was to consider they wanted to forget in the first place— 

"Emily? Are you okay?" Jesse tilted her head to the side.

Emily smiled, then shook her head as if to get the thoughts off her. "Sorry, spaced out doing calculations."

"Ugh, scientists." Dylan rolled his eyes. Unprompted, he aimed his gun. "You people think too much, make too many questions, you just ruin's people's—" he aimed for a Darling in the center - and hit one to the left, a small one, purely by chance. "Yeah! That's what I'm talking about!"

"Oh wow, I would never be this lucky. " Jesse raised an eyebrow. "I'd probably have the cork ricochet and hit me square on the forehead before that." And then she turned her attention to the remaining targets, picked another small Darling and shot it out of the box it was standing on. "Good thing I'm awesome."

Jesse went back to being a teenager in the short time everybody looked at the target and back, and she was full of herself for the obvious victory. It reminded Emily of the times when she found something useful In her incursions through the Oldest House and brought it to the Board Room for them to get a better look, but amplified tenfold. Maybe her emotional walls weren't as strong yet and so Emily could get an easier reading, or maybe the intensity of her emotions made it so Jesse was a teenager again; Emily was still running possibilities in her mind about those age shifts having specific sets of triggers, but she couldn't figure out the patterns yet.

"I assume I don't even need to take my last shot after that ." Emily pointed with her head towards the fallen target.

Jesse shrugged. "Do it, what if you finally manage to hit something?"

"Well, I'll have you know I've already been doing that, and it's hitting the targets I'm having a problem with."

This time, both Jesse and Dylan groaned.

"God, if I were the target I'd drop down out of embarrassment for this joke." Dylan shook his head.

"As long as I got the points, I wouldn't complain about it." Emily took a position and trained her gun on a big Darling target once more. Her shot missed by an inch, and Dylan started laughing.

"You almost hit it this time, at least!" Jesse tried to sound optimistic, but Emily knew she was just being kind; she was awful at shooting and whoever trained her on it in the future would have their hands full. 

"I suppose I'll leave the shooting for you for now." Emily never really thought she'd do good in that game, but the point was trying and getting some fun, not winning. She knew Jesse would kick everyone's asses, she shot at the Hiss daily and often while dodging projectiles and floating around. 

Jesse vaulted the counter of the boot and got inside effortlessly, crouching and reappearing on view with a cardboard box in her hands. It had consolation prizes written on the front of it, and Jesse put it down in front of Emily. "Here, take something nice." And then she repeated this and put a box before her brother, only this one had a label saying 21-30 points . The last box she got was for herself, a big one; it was labeled "top score", and she didn't hesitate delving into it.

There were all sorts of useless trinkets in the box, and Emily spent a moment searching through it, unsure of what she should take. Whistles, fake vampire teeth, plastic jewelry, very creepy badly-made small dolls...

“Here, Dylan, catch!” Jesse threw something at him, and Emily raised her eyes to take a peek. “For you.”

He wasn’t able to pick it up in the air, so whatever it was, it hit him on the shoulder and bounced off to the floor. It was a stuffed animal — a chubby, fluffy, adorable chinchilla, by the looks of it. Dylan gasped and immediately retrieved it, looking from it to Jesse and back, opening a delighted smile.

“He’s adorable! Are you sure I can— it’s your prize!” It was clear he was trying to be mindful of his sister, but he also was super excited about that stuffed animal.

Jesse shrugged. “And I chose to give it to you. I remember how much you liked them.”

Dylan had the purest smile on his face, and he held the chinchilla up like it was Simba from the Lion King. “I’m going to name you Charlie. Charlie the Chinchilla.”

Jesse chuckled. "And what did you get from your box?"

"Huh? Oh, this thing" He reached for the box and pulled a deck of cards. "We can play later. You told me you'd teach me some games, remember?"

"Yep. And you're going to be terrible at them, I know it."

"Hey!"

Dylan tried to swipe at her with one hand, but Jesse stepped out of his range easily, and wiggled her eyebrows at him to add a little taunting. They both had smiles on their faces and a sparkle in their uncommon eyes — they were happy, it was plain to see. Emily couldn't gauge precisely how much of it was their own feeling and how much it was an influence from the plane, but it made them playful and open in a way she'd never observed in their native reality and frankly, was heart-warming to watch. 

They deserved to have a nice, easy, healthy time, for a change; they suffered enough already, and it was the sweetest thing to see how much Jesse cared about Dylan, and how he was more awkward and blunt with his displays of affection, but loved her just as much. 

"And what did you get, Emily?" Jesse asked.

Emily was shaken out of her musings by the sound of her name, and she blinked and processed the words retroactively in her head, so she could interpret the sentence properly. What did she get? They were referring to the prize, right? She didn't get anything yet.

That was when she noticed her fingers were actually closed around something, a small, light object. She looked down at it and let out a surprised gasp under her breath.

"A bubble blower." She raised the telltale small bottle so the others could see it. "It's been a long time since I saw one of those."

"Huh. What are we doing next?" Dylan looked around, and at the same time tried to tuck Charlie the stuffed chinchilla on the front pocket of his coat. He naturally failed, as it was way too big for it. "Crap. Do you have a bag or something?"

"Yeah, give it here." Jesse carried the same backpack from earlier on one shoulder, even though she didn't have it a second before. She pulled it to the front and opened it, so both the chinchilla and the deck of cards were quickly placed inside. "Want to give me your thing, Emily?"

"No, it fits in my pocket." Emily made a very quick demonstration and put her little prize in it. "So why don't we check the other game booths?"

That was what they did. They played in the ring throw and fishing booths, then stopped to eat some snacks and returned to take a better look at the other attractions and rides. Dylan bet he'd be able to conquer a mechanical bull — strangely shaped like a vending machine — and failed miserably, to Jesse's absolute delight, and Jesse went almost feral wreaking havoc at the bumper cars ride that shifted once you got inside it, taking the shape of a stadium-sized concave arena. The cars also changed to something with more power and more padding, like small pods from a spaceship, and Jesse almost sent one flying to outer space by how hard she bumped — crashed? — against it. Emily was very glad the three of them had formed a group and she didn't have to face that raw power. Of course at some point Dylan started going against his own sister for the chaotic sibling factor, and then Emily happily stood out of their way and occasionally saw them zipping past in their pods like deranged balls on a newton's cradle, destined to hit each other.

When their time was up, the three of them got out of the ride laughing, dizzy and a bit weak of the legs, and collapsed on the first vacant bench they could find, right outside.

"Did you see what I did to that purple car?" Dylan was breathless from laughter. He clutched his belly and tood deep breaths, trying to calm himself, but started laughing all over again at the end.

"The way he spun, I think that guy will be dizzy until he's forty." Jesse pat him on the back playfully.

"I don't even know how you two are in one piece, to be honest." Emily was trying to style her hair back into its usual shape, but she'd soon find out that was futile; it was a wild mess in there, almost like she was in a glam rock band. "Several of those crashes surely would've caused dislocated limbs and concussions…"

Jesse looked at her and her eyes had a joyful glint to them, a warm fondness. "Sure, but we're Fadens; we're built differently."

"We're armored gods!" Dylan struck a pose with his arms outstretched, harnessing nonexistent power.

"Are we now?" Jesse slapped one of his arms back from her personal space. 

"You're adorable gods!" Emily replied.

"No!" Dylan faked choking and fell on Jesse's lap. "Anything but that!"

"She got you bro, she knows your true essence." Jesse laughed.

"The hell it is! I'm edgy and dangerous, okay?!"

"Sure…" He stuck his tongue out for her, which only made her smile bigger.

Emily was also smiling. She wasn’t kidding when she said the Fadens were adorable, and having them at ease, playful and silly around her, made her relax as well. She took a deep breath and looked up — the sky was so pretty in Ordinary. She could see Orion (he was easy to spot) and something beside him she was certain was also a constellation, but she couldn’t remember the name. Polaris chimed in her view, and a brief whisper reached Emily’s ears: Canis Major.  

Oh, I didn’t realize. The Great Dog… Thanks Polaris.

She acknowledged the praise with a soft twinkling that felt like a pat on the shoulder, and faded from view.

Emily pulled the bubble blower from her pocket, absentmindedly. As the bubbles went up to the sky, she felt a warmth in her chest, a comfort she hadn't felt for a long time now. Everything would turn out okay. They had each other: Jesse would protect them, Polaris would guide them, Emily would do her best to see things through, and Dylan would anchor them to their goal. They could do it, Emily could see them being back home, going to Central Park on a lazy afternoon, the sun warm on their skin, and staying just like this. It was happiness. 

Lost in thoughts, she couldn't notice what was going on, but Dylan did. He poked Jesse and pointed at Emily with his head, and Jesse had to suppress a gasp; at that moment, they were looking at an Emily who barely entered her teenage years, with long hair and a distant, soft expression. 

--

Chapter Text

The Faden siblings are happy here, that's painfully obvious. This place tends to their every mundane need, and they take care of each other on the rest. They feel comfortable and safe, and I am unable to quantify how much of it is the plane's effect on them, and how much it is real. Whatever the case may be, one thing remains incontestable: this life is not real. This glass dome providing whatever they need to thrive doesn't change the fact that in reality, the three of us are in a coma in Central Executive. The Hiss is still in the Oldest House and the surviving staff is stranded, even though things were being handled relatively well, in no small part because of Jesse's impossible feats. I shudder to think of the burden Arish must be carrying right now, dealing with not only his job but Marshall's as well, and with mine and Jesse's absence. We have to go back.

That will undoubtedly break Jesse's and Dylan's hearts, and mine by extent. It must be done, and yet I catch myself thinking of the cruelty of it: the Bureau keeps asking them to give and give and give — it took everything from them already. It wants more. But the people need help, and Jesse is the best chance they have. Even if I went back alone, the work I provide is scientific in nature, I can't protect anyone actively, or destroy the menace with firepower. Even though I ordered research into a way to weaponize the HRA's against the Hiss, progress was slow, and it would be foolish on my part to expect a solution was discovered in the time I spent chasing Jesse. 

We have to go back, and I can only hope the Fadens can build a life like the one they have here in our reality; one where they don't have to fear anymore, and they can afford to be free and happy again. I'd love to help them with that if they'd have me, if only as an insignificant reparation for Darling's acts.

Emily clenched her teeth and squeezed her eyes shut as the memories flooded her brain, overwhelming and way too vivid, all at once. She had just finished reading her notes, as Polaris instructed her to do with quite the urgency. Emily understood that insistence now. She remembered why she was truly there, in whatever absurd pocket of reality they were in, and thanked her resonance friend for helping her snap out of the haze the plane exerted on her — not that having a weight the size of the world on her shoulders was especially pleasurable, but Emily preferred that to being happy and oblivious.

Happy and oblivious like the Fadens were.

Emily took a breath and sighed, putting her notes back in her pocket. She couldn't blame them. Ever since they found a slide projector in a dumpster, every moment in their lives was hell or anticipation to the next hell, and if her life had been like this she'd want to hide away in her own world too. She did it, didn't she? When she was at her lowest… Emily was lucky, though, she was aware. She had a father who loved her and could help her through her personal hell when it struck. Jesse and Dylan didn't have that. They didn't even have each other after Ordinary.

They're going to hate me, aren’t they? And they'll be right to do so.

Polaris answered to that sad thought with warmth and a soothing sensation vibrating on Emily's head. It wasn't a confirmation or a denial; rather, it was a feeling that things would work out in the end.

Emily looked up and around the room she was in, big enough to fit two beds leaning on opposite walls and plenty of room to put mattresses down and have a slumber party. On the wall by Jesse's bed there were band posters and a somewhat artistic star chart, a couple of photos and a graffiti she undoubtedly made herself: beyond the shadow you settle for, there's a miracle illuminated. On Dylan’s wall were only a couple of drawings, both of him and Jesse; one very crude, one better-made. Emily had inquired about them the night before, and Dylan proudly told her that he did the prettier one, because his sister had absolutely no drawing skills. That earned him a pillow on the face, and that evolved into a pillow fight soon after. The memory brought a small smile to her lips. 

She found Dylan in the kitchen, a child devouring a pile of pancakes. There were two more piles by the oven, indicating Jesse didn't eat yet, but she was nowhere to be seen.

"Good morning," Emily nodded, and went to get her pancakes. 

"Hi," Dylan said, giving her a quick glance. "There's juice in the fridge if you want."

"Thanks, but I'll pass." She returned with her plate and sat down across from Dylan. "Did you make these? They look good!"

"It definitely wasn't Jesse," he chuckled darkly, then ate a piece of his food.

"She can't be this bad, can she? She must've learned how to cook in all that time on her own— wow this is really good, too!"

Dylan's eyes sparkled with pride, and didn’t hide the smile. "Thanks and sure, she knows how to cook — but that doesn't mean it's good ." He put an emphasis on the word and looked at her gravely, pausing for effect. Emily noticed the day before as well, and evidence mounted that Dylan leaned for the dramatic. It was a fun quirk, and it suited him. "Most of the time it's on a range from edible to awful."

"Really? I wouldn't have guessed." I might have to teach her some stuff, she thought.

"If you really want her to burn your kitchen down then sure, go for it." 

Emily immediately looked up from her plate, alarmed, and found Dylan distracted with mixing cocoa with his cup of milk, completely unaware he had just answered one of Emily's thoughts once more. That was crazy. Was this a new ability blossoming? There was nothing about telepathy in the extensively detailed P6 files.

Testing, testing— Dylan if you can hear me, congratulations you're a telepath!

There was no sign he heard anything. He was focused on mixing the contents of his cup with a spoon.

Did you know he could do this, Polaris?

She didn't appear to answer, which was odd.

Are you there?

A faint twirling of prisms in Emily's view was a confirmation, but the characteristic chimes were missing. Maybe something was interfering with the connection? If she could find— 

"I wonder where Jesse went," Dylan mused out loud, and it borough Emily’s attention back to him. "I was sure she'd want to stay in and I don't know, roll down to your mattress and cuddle or something."

There was a considerable chance that Emily would've choked if she had been drinking something that moment. Luckily she hadn’t; and that ensured her reaction only consisted of wide eyes and a furious blush on her cheeks, and not a beverage spat everywhere.

"What? Why would she do that?" Emily asked, voice a pitch higher than usual.

Dylan gave her a look like he was about to explain something very obvious. "Because she wants to?"

"But we don't— you do know we're not girlfriends, right? We're not anything even— "

"Yeah, I know, that doesn't mean she doesn't want to!" He rolled his eyes. "And god, is that annoying. Ugh."

Emily's head was spinning with this new information. Was Dylan messing with her? Did Jesse really want to be her… (God, just thinking about the word made Emily blush harder and sent a jolt down her spine) Girlfriend… or was his perception twisted by the fact he was jealous of his sister, and he didn't have a lot of parameters to gauge friendship?

"Why did you think I was calling you 'girlfriend' all this time?" He continued. "To tease you? You clearly don't mind, but she's a mess about it." He laughed.

Emily couldn't believe him that easily. She wanted to, sure, her heart was racing pitifully, but she was a rational, careful person. "That doesn't feel likely, Dylan. All this time she was focused on you and getting the Oldest House safe— "

The kitchen door opened with a slam.

"There's a new place in the city!" Jesse stood at the threshold, a breathless teenager bursting with excitement. When she caught sight of Emily,  she looked away immediately, redder than before.

"What?! Where?" Dylan asked, suddenly very excited.

"The start of the woods, near that old shack!"

He gasped. "And what is it?"

"I'm not just going to tell you - c'mon, let's go see it!"

"Hang on just a moment, Dylan made pancakes, you should come eat— " Emily started " —and there she goes."

"Eh, she'll come back when she notices we're not following." Dylan was unfazed. He ate a piece of his own pancakes. "What do you think it is, this place?"

Emily hummed. A hundred possibilities passed through her mind, sure, but given the impossible nature of the city… "I have no idea." 

"Maybe it's a secret hideout, like in those spy movies!" His eyes lit up with the possibility. "I'd love that."

--

It wasn't a hideout, or a store, or even a park. Following straight ahead from the old shack, into the woods and turning a corner on a big boulder, was a canyon with the biggest, widest waterfall. They were on the top part of it, and there was a strong concrete bridge crossing from one side of the river to the other, close to the fall. It didn't make any sense; the city wasn't in a mountainous area. Then again, not much in that plane did.

Emily was bewildered by the sight. Emotions spun and crashed inside her, and the clearest thought on her mind was that it shouldn't be possible; that place could not be there. 

"This is huge!" Dylan shouted, his voice muffled by the sound of the waterfall. Where are we?"

"I don't know but it's so cool, right?!" Jesse opened her arms as if she was presenting a show. "And it's not one of mine - have you ever seen a waterfall like this? It's not like the ones dad used to take us to."

"It's called God's fall. It's near a town called Watery."

Both Jesse and Dylan turned and saw Emily - a teenager now - taking slow steps towards the bridge, eyes transfixed on the waterfall. All sorts of emotions passed through her face: confusion, sadness, anxiety, but vulnerability overshadowed them all. Something about that place took Emily back to her past, and it wasn't exactly pleasant. 

"There wasn't a bridge like this back then. Maybe there's one now, I wouldn't know, I— " She took a shaky breath, carded her fingers through her hair and exhaled. "It's been some time."

"So it's one of yours…"  Jesse's voice softened to an almost reverent whisper, one that turned to concern. She was by Emily's side in a second. "How do you feel? We can leave, if you want."

"It's… Complicated." Emily looked back at Jesse then looked away, rubbing her arms against the cold wind. "But not bad."

How could Emily explain it? It involved a part of her life she wasn't all that willing to unearth, and that still shook her emotions now and then when it was evoked. She usually could deal very well with that, but seeing the waterfall in front of her like that was a more extreme experience than she wanted to admit.

"We're here with you, it's okay," Jesse assured her. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Did she? She felt like the words were stuck in her throat, like she wanted to share something but she didn't really deserve to - her struggles had been children's play compared to how much Jesse suffered. It was dumb, and it wasn't fair that she should burden her with her little story.

"I want to take a walk on that bridge." Emily gestured towards it. " Would you come with me?"

"Of course." Jesse nodded.

"I think I'll leave you two to it, then." Kid Dylan stretched his arms upward and to the sides, then pointed at a sign near them that Emily was sure wasn't there before. "You mind if I go see what those 'natural pools' are all about?"

Jesse hummed in thought. "Not at all, but don't die, you idiot, or I'll beat you back to your body!" Jesse waved a fist towards Dylan and he laughed.

"You can't see dead people, even less punch them!" He laughed.

"That's where you're wrong bro, I've seen several ghosts, they were an ass and kept telling me to do stuff." Jesse opened a smug grin with Dylan's incredulous face. "But yeah, go on and tell us everything after."

"Try not to be too gross with your girlfriend when I'm gone, please, you know I can feel echoes of you…"

"Get out of here already, you dumbass!" Jesse started running after him, blushing, and Dylan ran away laughing with the satisfaction of flustering his sister once more. She followed him shortly, maybe for less than a minute, and then turned back and rejoined Emily. "Little brat, I swear to god..."

"Is that true, though?" Emily tilted her head like a curious puppy. "Can he feel echoes of you?"

"Yeah, it's not a reliable ability or anything, but sometimes I can feel him too. I guess it's got something to do with Polaris."

Polaris blinked in their view like a small acknowledgement. It made them smile.

Then, silence.

Emily looked back at the water, at the bridge, and held her breath unconsciously.

Jesse held her hand. Emily whipped back to her and saw Jesse in her correct age, looking at her with both curiosity and affection. “Let’s go. I’ll protect you from the monsters on the way.” 

She was joking, that easy - beautiful, completely enticing - smile left no doubt about it, but there was more than that in her tone; There was truth to it, in a metaphorical sense. She would protect Emily, whatever those monsters turned out to be. It made Emily’s heart flutter. She wanted to hide her face in Jesse’s chest and be held, protected, and taken away from that place. She was also very strong-minded, curious and scientifically-oriented, so she started walking instead.This was a mystery and she wanted to get to the bottom of it.

Polaris reappeared on Emily's view, giving her a sense of slight concern. It was touching. No wonder Jesse loved her so much, she was so caring, even if in an alien kind of way…

I’m fine. You and Jesse are here with me. It was just unexpected.

She acknowledged it with a last twinkle of her fractals, but while she vanished from view, her presence stood around Emily like a mantle. Maybe she wanted to do good on what Emily just told her, maybe that was the idea all along, but it was very appreciated either way.

There was nothing remarkable about the bridge. It was large enough for a car to pass through comfortably, it had strong metal railings and thin lamp posts through the path. The cool part was the view of the river and subsequent falls.

They were almost in the middle when Emily asked to stop, and got closer to the edge. She placed her hands on the railing and looked down, to the water and the sudden drop. She got lost in the flow of it. Jesse stood by her side wordlessly, the picture of a guardian.

“You know, I’d come here with my father,” Emily finally said, her voice distant. “The observation platform bordered the river then, it wasn’t like this, but I’d stare at the water all the same.”

“Must’ve been nice.”

“It wasn’t. I… It wasn’t my father’s fault or anything, but—” Emily sighed and closed her eyes, took a moment to breathe. “It was peaceful, being in my own insignificance in the face of the powers of this world.”

“What?” Jesse was definitely caught off guard by that. Her big, surprised eyes made Emily chuckle. 

“It was good to look at the water and know it could take and completely obliterate me. Then think of how we can’t tame volcanoes, tsunamis and tornadoes. How powerful our sun is, or how a person can get crushed by the pressure of the ocean. We can’t tame or control these forces in their vastness - and who am I in the face of that?” She smiled a thoughtful, if sad smile. “It was good to know I was a blip in the universe. I didn’t have a grand destiny, or the responsibility to change the world like that. It wouldn’t even matter.”

“That... Doesn’t sound healthy at all, Emily.” 

“It wasn’t, but it was better than before. I’ll spare you the sad tale.”

“No,” Jesse’s eyes were burning with something Emily knew well: the same resolve she had when they talked about getting Dylan out of the coma, a fierce protectiveness. “If you want to tell, I want to listen - if only to know who I’ll have to punch for making you so sad.”

How could she say no to that?

“Well… One day a brilliant neuroscientist, one of the best in her field really, wondered if what made a genius could be manufactured in a controlled environment. She conducted extensive research on that front, and gathered enough data to start testing her hypotheses.” Emily pursed her lips in distaste, and when she spoke, her words were harder. “She also had a very young daughter.”

Jesse let out a surprised gasp that turned to sheer outrage. “ She didn’t. ” 

Emily’s smile told her everything she wanted to know. 

“ I’m going to kill her. ”

“Don’t bother. Being a ‘ridiculous fringe scientist, a conspirationist and a delusional myth-chaser only to spite her’ is enough of a revenge for me.” She huffed, rolled her eyes - there was poison there, and probably wounds that weren’t healing properly, but she didn’t want to go too far down that hole at the moment. “I’ve been to places and seen things she could never fathom; I survived; I could incinerate her in the blink of an eye with a fondue set if I really wanted to. I’m better than her.” 

Jesse was conflicted. She navigated from rage to protectiveness, and Polaris spun around her head until she stopped and calmed down a little. “Tell me she’s in prison, at least. Tell me she can’t do this to anyone else.”

Emily gave her a tired smile “She’s the lead neuroscientist in one of the best hospitals in Baltimore, now. She had powerful friends, the whole scandal was suppressed on the grounds she couldn’t conduct research anymore.”

“ Motherfucker!” Jesse growled.

“She didn’t bother us again, though, don’t worry. There’s a judicial order for that.”

“Like that ever stopped anyone!”

“Don’t worry, she doesn’t have an interest in me anymore. I was her failure, again and again—”

“You’d never be a failure, Emily. Ever .”

The strength of her words made Emily stop. Jesse looked so angry about everything, but when her eyes found Emily’s, it was distress burning there, mixed with sadness and something warm and sweet that ignited Emily’s heart. She had to look away, or she’d be pulled in.

“Not for the people who matter, I know.” Back to watching the water, and hoping it could hide her blushing. “I was fourteen when I broke down from all the rigid classes and appointments and testing. She’d convinced everyone I was a kid genius, especially me. I was always the first to say everything was okay when people asked, and suddenly I had… Well. I was in the hospital for a long time. Then, years of therapy. I didn’t see my parents divorce, but an aunt told me there was police involved, because dad wanted to kill my mother every time he saw her face after he found out everything. I ended up shutting down completely, and he’d bring me here, to be away from everything.”

Silence stretched between them for a long while. Emily thought maybe she’d done it; she made Jesse uncomfortable with her sad story or worse, she made her pity her. Shit...

“Can I hug you?” Jesse blurted out, like she failed to keep the question at bay.

Emily turned to her and she was blushing and fiddling with a lock of hair like she needed to do something - anything - to deal with the embarrassment. She was the cutest thing, and Emily felt so much relief she probably looked at her like she was the sun after a cold night. Again she averted her gaze; she didn’t know how to deal with it. Yet she crept closer, and Jesse pulled her into her arms with absolutely no qualms about it. She was warm and so comfortable, and most of all, she made Emily feel safe; she always had, and it was sort of baffling, actually. It also made Emily return to her correct age.

I could fall asleep like that.

"Thank you for telling me your story, Em," Jesse mumbled against her hair. "I'm glad you trust me this much.”

"You literally shared both of your biggest secrets with me within days of when we met, so I think it was even late on my part." Emily chuckled, placing her arms around Jesse’s waist, weakly.

"It's different, it was crucial at that point. And I don't know… Maybe Polaris was telling me I could trust you, too. She's so good at judging character, and she was excited about you."

"Was she?" Emily paused, then directed the thoughts at Polaris herself. Were you?

The prisms immediately twinkled within her view with a confirmation.

"Yes, when I was about to tell you about her, she was buzzing her crystals with this cautious anticipation, like she knew how awesome you were."

Thank you , Emily said mentally, not trying to hide her smile. I think you're awesome too. But how did you know?

Polaris didn't answer that. Maybe she didn't have a reliable way to tell Emily based on how they communicated, maybe she just wanted to keep the mystery going; either way, she was a resonance-based lifeform who warned Jesse something would happen at the Bureau a month or so before the Hiss came. She definitely had some knowledge about the future, and that subject on itself could result in years worth of research...

"And I'm sorry for what you went through," Jesse resumed her point, taking Emily out of her musings. "You didn't deserve any of that, and if you need anyone to go and give your mother a good beating…"

"Jesse no!" Emily giggled against her chest. It was so nice how they could lighten the mood around each other, even when the subject was something like this. "Maybe we could prank her with something more harmless and evil like a glitter bomb in her living room, I don't know - but thanks. It means a lot."

"A glitter bomb, wow, she'd never be able to get rid of that entirely - true evil!" Jesse laughed. "...Are you okay, though?" Emily felt Jesse's eyes on her, and wondered if Polaris and she were talking about her right now.

"Yeah, I guess. This isn't as painful as it was before, but getting reminded of it all of a sudden caught me off guard. It's never pleasant, I admit, but I'm glad you're here with me."

"Nowhere else I'd rather be!" 

Emily shoved her weakly, playfully, and they stared at each other. "You liar."

"No, I'm serious!”

“With all those amazing places you have in your city? Doubtful.”

“They’re better with company, you know,” Jesse said in a sheepish half smile, and she was so genuine in her delivery that it stole Emily’s breath for a second. She took a lock of hair away from her face. “There’s so much I’d like to show you… But there’s one place - a special one , that I’d really like to take you to when you feel like going." 

"How can you tempt me like that when you have one of the most comfortable hugs in existence, Jesse? That’s borderline cruel." Emily snickered lightly, but she wasn't exactly joking. What she was doing, actually, was stall her answer - because if she let herself do whatever she wanted, she’d have said - or rapid-fired - a yes as soon as Jesse made her proposition. The way Jesse hesitated, like it was a big deal for her, the way her eyes darted away and back, clearly full of expectation… Emily wouldn’t even try to argue with herself; she’d go whatever that woman went. She was already doing it, wasn't she?

"You think so?" Jesse's eyes widened for a moment, and she blushed. "W-well I suppose I'll have to hug you more often, then! If you'd like it, I mean."

"I would." Emily gave her a reassuring smile that she hoped with all her willpower didn't betray how much she wanted it. "And I’ll call you on this when we get there." She broke the hug and offered Jesse a hand. They exchanged a look, and Jesse took it.

--

They ran back, but they might as well have flown with how quickly they got to the city, or maybe space itself folded so they'd have a shortcut through the woods. Jesse zigzagged around the trees, never letting go of Emily's hand, making her follow clumsily behind, giggling and throwing empty threats. Emily wasn't a runner - didn’t have healthy exercise habits either, for the matter - but she felt like something filled her with energy and enabled her to keep up. Maybe it had to do with Jesse's excitement.

Soon enough they reached the Carnival and there were no people around, the same as the day before. 

They arrived at a ride where the entrance was made to look like the outside of a gothic mansion, and all the lights inside gave off a blue, ominous glow. A sign above the double doors informed them it was the House of Mirrors.

"Totally not haunted," Emily joked.

"The ghosts know better than to mess with me." Jesse puffed her chest in a mocking heroic pose and pushed the door open, giving Emily a nod before going in.

Emily hadn't been in a mirror maze before, but she'd seen pictures and was familiar with the concept. She still didn't expect what she'd find within this one: the mirrors were everywhere, including the floor and the ceiling, forming an hexagonal pattern. The ominous blue lights they saw from the outside came from numerous small twinkling lights reflected inside the mirrors like galaxies in the dark of night, stars that were absent from the real space where Emily and Jesse now stood. The borders of the mirrors were darkened by the low lights, and could easily disappear to the inattentive eye; it felt like they were surrounded by the universe trapped in glass, and it was a mesmerizing sight. 

"Jesse, that's amazing!" Emily turned on her heels to look at all the mirrors, and found a curiously proud Jesse looking back at her.

"It is." Her eyes glimmered in the dark, and Emily didn't know if it was caused by the glowing light around them or Jesse's own uniqueness. "but it isn't our final destination. Tag, you're it!"

Jesse tapped Emily on the shoulder and ran straight ahead, not caring to slow down as the mirror got dangerously closer.

"Jesse!" Emily reached towards her uselessly, and hearing her name only made Jesse smile before she simply put a foot and then the other on the surface of the mirror and started running up the wall. If Emily's mouth was ajar before, now her jaw was on the floor.

"Aren't you coming after me, Emily?" Jesse had the brightest smile as she made her way to the mirror directly above Emily and stood upside down. "I'm waiting!" 

She opened her arms in an invitation and then was swallowed up by the mirror in that same pose, completely unbothered.

What the actual—?! Okay, okay, that's— wow that's so exciting!

Emily shook her head and smiled with the prospect of maybe, just maybe, being able to do the same thing as Jesse and pursue her in a mirror maze that clearly didn't obey the laws of physics as they knew them. She ran up to the mirror as she saw Jesse do before and performed an awkward jump/reaching motion that made her tumble towards and almost crash against a surface - but one at an angle on the ceiling. It worked! She took a moment to delight in the fact she was standing on the wall as easily as she'd do it on the floor, and resumed her way to the mirror right in the center. When she got there, though, she didn't know how to get inside it - should she do something, or…?

Something grabbed her ankle and suddenly she was sinking in dark waters. 

Then she blinked, and she was drifting gently down towards the floor in a room identical to the one she just left, and Jesse was the one with a grip on her.

"You have to let yourself fall!" Jesse clarified happily, and then pushed Emily away from her, so both were floating in opposite directions. She then made a graceful arc diving in the air, and entered a mirror to their left.

Emily gasped and then scoffed in mild offense for being left on her own like that, and tried to move her body like she was swimming, as silly as that felt.

I suppose it's easier when you're already used to flying, she thought grumpily, and Polaris both appeared as comfort and laughter in her mind.

Swimming in the air was a slow affair, but it let Emily get to the mirror. She put both hands on it, feeling the cold glass, and took a deep breath. She had to let herself fall, right? She pushed herself forward, bashing her head against the surface - but it felt like hitting a thin air mattress, or maybe a stretched curtain. It gave way and once again she was diving amongst the lights and the dark mist, only to be floating down an identical room a second after.

This time Jesse was waiting for her sitting on the floor below. "Good job, you did it! I'm not helping you now, though. Catch me!" And then she sunk in the mirror.

"Wait— oh I'll get you!" Emily caught herself giggling as she swan down, and thus began the proper chase. They'd dive inside a mirror on the right and come out upside-down from one on the floor, hop in one on the left and appear in a diagonal, so it was reasonable that sides started having no meaning after a couple of times. Jesse would tease Emily, staying in her way and dodging her attempts to grab her at the last minute, just because she knew she was quicker and more in control than her flailing friend. She never mocked her about it, though, opting to give her tips instead - pretend you're in the water, make wider arcs with your arms - which sure were nice in intent, but Emily wanted to groan in frustration because she absolutely wasn't a good swimmer, or diver, or good at physical activities in general. Still, trying this also filled her with unapologetic joy and awe, like a child seeing something they'd dub magic. Jesse was magic. She had that unexplainable thing about her, she was right at home with the impossible places and unknowable stars, and it was okay that they'd probably never find a way to learn what exactly was going on in there. It was an excuse for Emily to keep being lost in her depths.

And so, she dove deeper.

One time she was able to gain momentum from a fall and almost catch Jesse's arm before she pushed herself out of the way. A second, she almost fell on top of her. The third time she almost got her, her hand slid through Jesse's jacket as she couldn't stop her movement and darted forward like a bullet, straight through another mirror.

This time she was jettisoned out and rolled twice on the floor before coming to a stop face down on a faded red carpet. It smelled like strong cleaning products and cigarettes.

"Ouch…" she whimpered, but was still chuckling with herself as she sat up and took in her surroundings. Her very unexpected surroundings. "The Oceanview Motel?"

How could that be possible, or rather, did that prove Emily’s theory that the motel was a place of passage between planes of existence?! She tumbled up to her feet and went to the counter—

"Are you okay, Em?" Jesse appeared from the door from where Emily assumed she’d also come from, since it was on the end of the corridor and clearly one of the mirrors they were diving into. 

"I am— This is the Oceanview!"

"Yep!" Jesse popped the P on the word. "And not the right way."

Emily furrowed her brow, and took a step towards Jesse. "So are we still going somewhere?"

"Oh yeah, otherwise we'd be popping up in places like this all the time. C'mon." Jesse pointed over her shoulder to the mirror/door and turned to go.

Emily thought of asking about these other places they could be popping up into, but Jesse had her back to her and was walking calmly, unguarded… This was an opportunity!

She smiled in an impish way and ran towards her with all the speed she could muster. Jesse was almost stepping into the mirror when she turned, and she couldn't escape: Emily tackled them both back into the House of Mirrors, and their fall was instead turned into an arc as Jesse floated and caught Emily safe into her arms before she crashed into another unexplored mirror/doorway.

"Got you!" Emily almost slapped Jesse's arm with how excitedly she tapped her.

Jesse tilted her head back with laughter. "Guess you did!" She shifted Emily's weight to have her secured by the waist with one arm, and with the other she gave them an impulse towards a specific mirror northeast of where they were. They breached this one together, and the two afterwards, always up, like they were resurfacing from a dive.

They fell sideways on solid ground after passing through the fourth mirror, getting a faceful of sand. Red sand, Emily noticed as she coughed it out. Once again she sat up like someone zapped her, and this time she completely lost her breath.

They were in a place where dunes upon dunes of red sand stretched endlessly, and the sky was a threatening sort of red-orange twilight. Five towers of black stood resembling a hand in the hill ahead of them, and in the middle, a massive polyhedron floated in stark contrast with its surroundings. They were in Slidescape 36 - The Hand.

I know you were upset that Darling didn't bring you here, so… Jesse nodded forward with her head like it was no big deal.

Emily tried to ask how they could be there, but no sound came out of her mouth. She remembered Darling's video on the subject - sound was limited, radio frequencies were scrambled or cut, the whole place bore deep resonance marks and could rip people apart with feedback loops. So how was Jesse talking?

It's not the real thing, it's kinda like the memories I have of this place, but I wanted you to see it. Jesse continued, apologetic and unaware of Emily's inner workings. Emily noticed she wasn't moving her lips at all while talking.

Are you speaking in my head? Emily frowned.

Uh— oh yeah, sound doesn't really work here. Polaris is helping me do it.

That made sense and it was amazing, but as soon as it was sorted Emily's gaze flew back to the hill, the towers and the ominous polygonal structure floating there. That's Hedron. That really is Hedron .

Yeah. How I remember it. Jesse was still embarrassed about it, it seemed. She definitely didn't expect the sudden hug Emily gave her, the almost disbelieving excitement she had, or the expression that was as bright and warm as sunshine.

Let's go see it! Emily got up and started running up the hill like it would earn her an Olympic medal. 

There was a resounding vibration that got stronger the closer she got to Hedron, filling her ears with both a high and a very low-pitched sound that buzzed in her body like she was standing beside a wall of speakers. It didn't hurt her, though, and her mind instantly went back to her memory of the Hiss trying to bury into her mind when the HRAs failed; it was the same sort of sensation, but while this one was pleasant, even, that one had been all pain and horror.

She stared at Hedron, marveling at how impossibly mathematically perfect it looked, how it radiated unknowable power, and yet it still wanted to protect people. There was this collective image of unknown alien entities bringing cosmic destruction, terror, madness and all sorts of misfortune, but it was heart-warming to know that in reality, these forces could be made from the best emotions and desires sentient entities could muster as well - pretty much like humans. And being around humans helped as well. 

You definitely learned a lot from Jesse, and she learned from you. Emily thought to Polaris, who glittered like her prisms were stars as a response - she was proud. Darling learned a lot from Hedron. Do you think it did, too?

A sudden sadness filled Emily at the thought. Darling's last days were pretty miserable, if his presentations were anything to go by, and Hedron was torn apart and lost, both as a result of trying to defend the Bureau and the people in it from the Hiss invasion.

She took a hand to her chest absentmindedly, and found a familiar clunky device resting there: somehow thinking of the efforts to protect people summoned an HRA to her. Hedron's and Darling's legacy, of sorts.

I hope he's okay, wherever he is.

Polaris agreed with the sentiment.

Of course, he wouldn't have been able to do anything if Hedron didn't give him the right sort of resonance, so I wonder what I can gather now that I'm here...

Emily had an admittedly bad habit of distracting herself with work when she wanted to run away from her feelings. That, coupled with the excitement for the unique opportunity she had, made her run at 200% on gathering information and formulating hypotheses. If science had inebriating qualities, she'd be getting drunk on it deliberately at the moment.

 Jesse took a leisurely pace going up the hill, and she reached the top when Emily had finished three quarters of her circle around Hedron. She both smiled and raised an eyebrow. I'm glad you're having fun! I knew you'd go crazy with the note-taking.

This is Hedron! Emily said once again, giddy as a child. This is a seemingly mathematically perfect polyhedron made of unknown material that not only kept in contact with Dr. Darling through the years, but originated our protective symbols, the HRAs, kept us safe from the Hiss — and probably took Darling out of this plane of existence!

And gave me Polaris. Jesse said simply, putting her hands in her pockets.

Yes! And God, none of us would be alive without her. She took care of you, she brought you to the Bureau to save us!

Jesse tilted her head in a mildly curious expression and went silent. Emily could see Polaris' prisms around her head like a halo, so it was safe to assume they were talking. She turned back to her task to give them some privacy and soon was absort in it all over again. She wished she had a frequency recorder with her...

I didn’t… Go to that place to save you. I didn’t even know why I was there at first, besides searching for clues of Dylan… Jesse said not long after. She sounded embarrassed, apologetic even.

And even then you did, despite having every reason not to. Emily replied matter-of-factly. Polaris spun in her view with a sense of approval, and she smiled. Give yourself some credit, Jesse; you’re remarkably kind.

I-- thank you? I never understood why you accepted me so fast, though. I was all kinds of shady, it should've been very suspicious--

Oh it was, Emily chuckled fondly. But you were the Director. You literally cleansed Central Executive back into shape, I had to cut you some slack. She turned to face Jesse again, and locked eyes with her. Besides, you were the only one who had a chance to go out there and do something impactful. You can bet I'd go with shady and probably traitorous if it meant getting more people alive out of that.

That's certainly practical. Jesse shifted her weight. I, uh, was ready to fight each and everyone in that place to get to Dylan, but when we talked I was glad I wouldn't have to, you know, because I liked you.

I liked you too. Right from when we met outside the shelter. And there was Emily, all smiles again. You were so lost, but determined at the same time. I had this weird feeling I could trust you.

I guess that was what being saved did to you! Jesse laughed.

I like to think it was an instant connection, Emily said, and tilted her head curiously at how Jesse blushed and averted her gaze.

Like what? The sort of thing people experience when certain doom is at their doorstep?

Sure, that too! Emily laughed. But I was referring to something akin to aligned waveforms, actually - they might not be the same but they harmonize great. Think of instruments in a song: you're a bold electric guitar and I'm a piano.

I think I'd have a song for that, Jesse mumbled quite shyly, but Emily was close enough to hear it and of course it would pique her interest.

I'm looking forward to hearing it, then. She offered her a soft smile, but for some unknown reason Jesse got more flustered than she already was with her words. She could be so sheepish sometimes…

It's funny you're talking about connections like this, because… Well, I did my best to try to fit in, but I couldn't really connect with people all those years. She took a step forward, small and hesitant, almost dragging herself. And then I met you and you didn't bat an eye when I told you about Polaris - That put me in mental health wards before and you just… Accepted it. And you helped. You cared for us.

And now she's talking to me too, Emily added.

Jesse let out some air she'd been holding. God, yes! She's talking to you and she led you here! Emily, you're so special.

Something in the way she said this made Emily's heart race and soar at the same time. It was affectionate, vulnerable, almost pleading - the sort of thing a person wouldn't use lightly, especially Jesse.

To you, or in general? Emily dared to whisper, her eyes darting to Jesse's lips. The way they parted and closed and parted again, so welcoming…

They'd gravitated closer, inside each other's space. 

To me. Strongly. And I really, really need you right now.

And then Emily knew it was over. Jesse pulled her in gently, cupped her face and approached slowly, waiting for any signs of rejection. She found none; Emily pulled her in by the shirt and promptly kissed her, burying a hand in her hair, getting a small approving noise out of Jesse. She tasted so good. Not only that, but her touch was electric, she didn't waste time to deepen the kiss, the little gasps she made, the way she grabbed Emily's waist and pressed them flush together - she'd been yearning for this, just like Emily did. She wanted her.

It was heaven. It was also the crumbling of Emily's resolve to take the Fadens’ back to their reality.

How could she stay firm, when Jesse looked at her like she was the sun after a long winter? When she held her face delicately, with shaky hands and hitched breath, like she couldn't believe that was happening? They parted and stood inches apart, taking in the sight of each other. Jesse's eyes were alight with fondness and the same glow Polaris' prisms had. It was breathtaking.

Emily— Jesse started, but she was cut short by Emily pulling her in for another kiss. This one was messier, hungrier, but also quicker - Emily herself pulled away, like she suddenly remembered composure. She giggled, though, and leaned her forehead on Jesse's.

There was so much she could say: her love-drunk brain wanted to babble about insanity and fate and desire, but she found herself at a loss of words. She moved in for a hug and was quickly enveloped by Jesse's arms, clinging to her like she needed her to breathe. Maybe she did. Was that what love felt like? 

Emily let herself be taken by exhilaration and comfort, her mind empty of anything that wasn't that moment. In turn it washed away her worries in the way that place had done before while she slept: she forgot why she was truly there, willingly this time. She only wanted to - finally - be with Jesse where she was free and happy, away from all the hurt, the binding responsibilities, the power dynamics… She understood what was so good about this place. They could be and do whatever they wanted, here. They could be free. 

The light Emily saw in Jesse’s eyes, this glimmer of happiness, of hope, she wanted to see it every day, to be part of it. There, she would.

Chapter Text

Time passed like the blink of an eye. Emily tried to gather more info on Hedron after she and Jesse stole a lot more kisses under its shadow, but all she managed was to sit on the red sand and listen to Jesse's account of her first meeting with the entity when she was a kid. They snuggled and ate snacks that appeared near them inside one of the emergency supplies containers from the Bureau, and Emily didn't even care about the very opportune placement of it - It was there, and things like this happened frequently in this plane. It wasn't all that interesting to question it. 

Jesse's love and reverence for Polaris - which she believed was inside Hedron or broadcast through it - wasn't new, but it always impressed Emily. It was equally impressing how Hedron resonated as she told the story, with a pleasant hum that bordered white noise. All the while Polaris herself kept appearing and sending her own impressions of the account to both Jesse and Emily, which led to some funny banter between the three of them. Sometimes it bordered on teasing, sometimes it was interesting, others, it was sweet and heartwarming.

There was something else in Polaris' impressions, though. Emily could feel an underlying tension she couldn't really place when she tried to think about it, like something was getting lost in translation. She wondered if Jesse felt it too.

Eventually they floated back through the House of Mirrors and found out it was night outside. Jesse complained about time sometimes being weird, and they walked down the streets to the house the Fadens made their own, hand in hand, talking about the length of days on other planets. They stopped at a conveniently-placed restaurant on the way and got some pizzas when both realized they were very hungry, and Jesse kicked the front door open despite Emily offering to open it herself, since she had her hands empty. Dylan was in the living room, a teenager sitting almost upside down on the couch, playing video games. He barely looked away from the screen when Jesse announced through sing-song she and Emily had arrived, as if the noise from kicking the door wasn’t telling enough. He did groan exaggeratedly, though.

"You two are so gross!" He said. "I was so far away and I still could feel the dumb happiness, eugh."

"I'm guessing you won't want to have pizza with us, then…" Jesse made a show of pulling the boxes away from him.

"I never said that!"

Dinner was all about the Fadens destroying the pizza's in record time and Emily setting aside her slices so they wouldn't devour them as well. Later, Jesse and Dylan enrolled in the traditional Mario Kart showdown they had once in a while. Emily had a lot of fun watching them trash-talk, bicker and sometimes shove each other around. She'd root for both of them, and when Jesse questioned her loyalty in an exaggerated and clearly fake display of heartbreak, Emily would say she was rooting for chaos so she'd get peak entertainment. Jesse ended up winning on the Rainbow Road , and Dylan walked away to take a bath, complaining about cheating and blue shells.

Being alone again, Jesse took Emily to the top floor of the house with mattresses and blankets she dragged around telekinetically, and they set their beds and laid down to stargaze on the rooftop. Jesse knew a fair deal about constellations, and when asked about it, simply said she always liked stars and Polaris only solidified that, but she was no Astronomer; maybe in another life.

"Did you want to be anything when you grew up?" Emily asked, not taking her eyes away from the constellation Jesse just showed her, Scorpio.

"Not exactly, I think? But I wanted to go out and see the world, maybe have a motorcycle like the bad boys on TV." She shrugged. "You?"

"Well when I was six, I was sure I was going to be as good a neuroscientist as my mother," Emily looked back at Jesse and confirmed her guess that she'd be doing an angry grimace at the mention. It was sweet. "but I also wanted to be an adventurer and find lost, magical civilizations, maybe a beautiful partner with godly powers… I really liked Disney Atlantis, if you couldn't tell." She chuckled. "In retrospect, that movie was also very telling about my sexuality. I think I had a crush on half the cast…"

Jesse laughed loudly at that. "Oh I would've loved to see that, kid Emily panicking with too many crushes."

"We should watch it, you'll see what I mean."

"Sure. I don't remember a lot of it, too, so that'll be good." Jesse planted a kiss on Emily's temple, and nudged it with her nose. "Have you noticed how you got what you wanted, though?"

"Oh?" Emily tilted her head to look at her better.

"Maybe you didn't get to see a whole bunch of lost civilizations, but you've been to places and seen things most people wouldn't even dream of, and well…" Jesse gave her a crooked smile. "You got your princess with godly powers, huh?"

Emily laughed and shoved her lightly. "This is so corny but I can't even be mad, you're right!"

"Disney definitely wouldn't want to make a movie about me, though. Too weird. The musical numbers would be a fiasco."

"You know you're now legally forced to show me your musical theatre skills, right? I can't give you a proper verdict with incomplete data." Emily gave her an impish look, and Jesse shook her head.

"Hell no!" She laughed. "I am bad , you'll have to take my word for it."

"I only deal with experimentation, Jesse Faden." Emily's smile only widened.

"Oh yeah?"

"Mm-hm."

"Then let's experiment with something else." Jesse pulled her in by the chin and kissed her. It was a soft deal at first, but it didn't take long for some hands to wander and some encouraging sounds to get things more heated between them; Emily was all but pulling Jesse on top of her when a ball of white something hit Jesse on the head and a cloud of smoke formed around them.

"What the fuck?!" Jesse shouted, rolling off Emily and patting her hair frantically to take all that powder off it.

"Tone it down you two, Jesus!" Dylan's voice came from the door, and sure enough he was there when Emily looked, holding an open sack of flour in his hands. "I don't want to have it broadcasted to me downstairs!"

"You threw flour at me!" Jesse shouted, giving him a murderous look.

"Of course I did! Fat chance you'd just hear me out— yeouch!" He ducked right on time to avoide an incoming pillow.

"I'm going to get you, Dylan!" She flew in his direction like a bullet, and not in the figurative sense: Her abilities let her do so, and throw all the blankets to the other direction with the force of her impulse. Dylan was used to this and had powers of his own, though, so he dodged her tackle by a hair and started running towards the balcony, throwing another handful of flour at her as he went.

Emily had barely sat up when he jumped from the edge, then she saw Jesse do the same; and she only got to the edge when both the Fadens were already on the grass below and covered in white, wrestling each other. They were loud and colorful at their insults, and it was surprisingly entertaining to watch Dylan complain that Jesse had been annoying before, talking about Emily all the time, and now she was a hormone-fueled disaster who radiated her horniness to his mind unprompted. Jesse, in turn, told him to shut the door to his head better, and he groaned that he did, the point was exactly how overwhelming she was.

Emily was having a good time there, watching them from her VIP seat, so she was taken by surprise when Polaris spun in her view briefly, with the urgency and the intensity of a punch; Immediately after, a flood of information crashed in her mind, filling it with all sorts of scenes flickering like changing channels: people walking in Central Research, fiddling with lab equipment at Parakinesiology, talking and laughing on their breaks in the cafeteria… Huddled near the control point in Central Executive, looking exhausted and fearful.

This scene remained longer than the others, and felt more real as well. Emily could almost taste the air of tension as people paced around, unsure of what was really going on, trying their best to do their jobs if only to get some sense of normalcy and control. She saw Rangers guarding the doors and big HRA machines by its sides. Arish hunched over his table, studying maps and giving orders to the security personnel - he had deep bags under his eyes and a strong aura of exhaustion. A woman broke into tears in a corner and tried to suppress it, but a colleague got to her and hugged her shoulders, assuring her it was better to let it out. Emily knew this woman, she was a junior researcher. She helped with the Hiss incantation recording...

At the thought of the Hiss, the scene flickered and changed. Now it was the Central Research cafeteria, completely empty. Chairs were turned over, the tables nearer the entrance were peppered with bullet marks. Central Research stretched beyond, hauntingly silent except for the low, almost ininteligible chanting of the floating hiss-infected employees. A ranger laid dead in a pool of their own blood by the stairs. There was a big chunk of the railing missing from its original spot, which was now embedded on the Ash Jr. quote plaque. Emily was sure that was Jesse’s work—

—and at the thought of her, the scene changed abruptly to a room with all its desks pushed to the wall and a big glass cage in the center. Emily could see two people inside: Jesse and Dylan laying on gurneys, unmoving, attached to heart monitors. They were…  In a coma? That felt right, but somehow distant, like she was filtering the information through the haze of a dream. It made her nervous. the monitors indicated they were okay, sure, but they were unresponsive… It was a wild contrast to the siblings she was just watching roll through the grass covered in flour.

A beeping sound got louder and quicker all of a sudden, startling her. Both the monitors didn't change, so it couldn't have come from either of them, but it definitely came from that direction. A couple of people in lab coats (Medics? Scientists?) ran around the glass cell and drew Emily's attention. She took after them and discovered a smaller cell behind the first one, where another person resided, though their condition was far more dire than the others: they were attached to a myriad of machines responsible for the life support of a comatose person, and the heartbeat monitor was the one screaming in face of dangerously deviating numbers. 

The person laying there was Emily. She looked thin and sick, and as the medic brought a defibrillator inside the cell to revive her, the Emily who was watching this unfold was pulled away from the vision.

She gripped the rooftop railing until her knuckles went white. 

She was comatose. They all were.

Her breath hitched, she felt her fingers and tongue start to prickle in a very uncomfortable way, and the telltale waves of heat that came with panic attacks started assailing her. She did her best to try and center herself, used a couple of different breathing techniques. She then demanded her memories come back to her and was readily complied with - as simply as opening a can and pouring its contents in a bowl.

The urgency and tragedy of her primary task hit her full force, right in the heart.

Emily looked at the siblings, running around and trying to hit each other with tree branches this time. Their laughter was infectious, their happiness resounded through the empty space and filled it with life - life she had never seen in any of their expressions in their own reality. She saw Hiss-infected Dylan and his terrifying madness; she saw hope, pain, exhaustion and resolve - always resolve - in Jesse’s face, but happiness like this was something that was robbed from them long before, when they were separated in Ordinary. Here, in this dream-like place, they could be young again and live in their corner of a pretend world where they were king and queen, and no harm would ever befall them. They were interrupted kids, living what was taken from them.

How could Emily intrude on that, call out and take them away? She’d be doing the exact same thing the Bureau did all those years before, even though the underlying situation was vastly different. Jesse and Dylan deserved to be happy. She couldn’t… She couldn’t .

A lump formed in her throat. She could hear her own voice in her head, echoing that sentimentality was a problem in those situations. She wholeheartedly wanted this inner voice to go fuck itself.

She ran. The Fadens were busy with their fake battle by the side of the house, so it wasn’t a problem to walk out and vanish through the empty streets, trying to suppress the urge to cry. When did she become a victim of her own feelings? It was because of Jesse, wasn't it? She was all about raw emotion under her cool semblance, a storm that only dropped at the Hiss, despite the vast reasons she had to loathe the Bureau. Why was she so kind? Why did she care so much? Emily saw her giving her all to protect people she didn't know and clean messes she didn't make over and over again. Empathy like that wasn't something easy to find. Was it really surprising Emily was swayed by it?

No, even from a scientific standpoint it made a lot of sense. Emily huffed, trying to maintain some semblance of dignity. She could admit she wasn't fully in control, but she just needed a secluded place to let the crying out, then she’d rejoin the siblings and think of what she’d do with her predicament. It would be okay. She was Emily Pope; she always found her way through challenges.

Her hiding place of choice was a garden hidden in an alley behind a big old house, a fair distance away from where the Fadens were. She sat down on a bench around lovely begonias and looked up at the stars, finally letting the tears fall. The sky tended to be beautiful in places like that, with a clear view of the celestial bodies. It was a stark contrast from the polluted atmosphere of New York.

Emily knew Polaris wasn’t a star, she probably wasn't even primarily corporeal, but if names held power - and she believed so, she was always meaning to start research on that topic - then she had something of the North Star she was named after, and Emily’s behavior could be excused as a symbolic gesture.

I need help, she thought, pained. What should I do…

Polaris didn’t offer an answer, but stood around her with her soothing aura. She seemed to be open to listening, but Emily didn't know where to begin explaining her plight, especially because her friend witnessed everything along with her.

"Emily? What happened? Why— why are you crying?"

Jesse was there in the entrance to the garden. Emily had to blink a couple of times to certify herself she wasn't seeing things, and only after that she thought of a possible explanation for her appearance: With her mind set in chaos as it was, she didn't account for the fact that the place they were in was the Faden's domain, so knowing someone's location was probably a simple task for them. If whole places appeared out of nowhere, bending space and getting somewhere fast was probably a walk in the park, too.

"I— it's nothing." Emily tried to wipe her face in a hurry, fully aware that she wouldn't be able to hide her state anymore.

"Em." Jesse took a step forward and bent down so she was at Emily's level. Worry was clear in her eyes. "It's okay. Did Dylan upset you with his ramblings? Was it me? I know we're two gremlins and you're not used to being out here on your own, so if we overlooked something—"

"That's not it." Emily looked down at her hands. "You've been wonderful."

"Then what happened?"

She should tell her. She really should. Jesse was the Director, the central piece in the Bureau, she had to help them get through the lockdown. But she was also someone who never wanted to be any of that. She just wanted her brother… And Emily wanted to be with her. With them, if that was what it took.

"It's not fair," Emily said, closing her hands and opening them weakly. "What I have to do."

Jesse frowned, and put a hand over hers. "Then don't do it."

"If it was just for me… But it isn't—”

“What’s going on? You can tell me, I’ll try to help as much as I can, you know that, right? Is it bad?”

The worry in Jesse’s whole demeanor was almost too much to bear. Polaris urged Emily to tell her, and even though she was very conflicted about it, she knew she had to do it. Living in a dream, in the reflection of real life… It wasn't a good thing. There were people depending on them on the other side.

“Do you remember why you came here?"

"I live here." Jesse raised an eyebrow.

Emily closed her eyes, sighed heavily, and opened them again."You came to bring Dylan back to our world. To wake him up, through the Report."

"I…" Jesse’s voice failed, and the breath caught in her throat. She took her hand away, to her temple. "But he doesn't want to go. He's afraid, I— I can't really remember— but it's okay. It's okay. I'm here."

"I'm sorry…" Emily mumbled, suppressing again the tears that came from seeing the way Jesse's face fell. "We— we have to go back, Jesse. The three of us. People need us."

Jesse's nails dug in her palms, she pressed her lips in a thin line. With every little thing she remembered, it was clear she was hurting. Emily prayed Polaris could protect her from it somehow. She already suffered so much...

"Dyl has nothing back there. People hate him. Blame him. I can't protect him from that. Here… He's safe. He wants to stay, we— we can be together. We take care of each other."

"I know." Emily looked down again. She could see all of Jesse's reasoning, and it made her miserable to go against it. "I'm sorry."

"Is that why you came?" Jesse's voice faltered again. Her eyes flashed with something else - fear? - and she took a step back, rising to full height, but leaning away. "Not for me, but... To bring me back?"

Emily was about to lose her, depending on what she said next. One would think a woman of science like her would consider her words carefully but instead, she just shot them straight out of her heart. "Of course it was for you, I'd never— Jesse, I didn't know what happened, you wouldn't wake up! What if you were trapped somewhere awful, unable to get to Dylan or to get out? I couldn't leave you like that. It would rip me apart!"

"But I'm…You're amazing, you'd handle things. You could deal with the… The… Hiss? You'd get away, eventually. I'm just the firepower."

"Just the fire power" Emily parroted, letting out a disbelieving huff. "Jesse, I let myself fall to a coma willingly so I could hop through alternate realities on the chance I'd reach you. You're insanely important to me. I…" She hung there with her mouth partly open, then shook her head. Did Jesse really not get it, even after the day they spent together? It looked like all of that just vanished from her brain. Did she not know how much Emily adored her? "I just want you to be happy, you know. But we also have people to get out of the lockdown and-- You're happy here. I don't want to— I should leave."

She got up, ready to walk away, but Jesse caught her hand before she could move from that spot.

"But I want you here," Jesse pleaded. "I missed you so much."

It was so unfair how that impacted Emily. She couldn't see Jesse in this position, so lost and vulnerable, asking for her to stay, and to have to do something contrary to that.

"I missed you too," Emily mumbled, then steeled her resolve and looked back at Jesse, straight in the eye. "I promise it will be different, Jesse. I'll do everything I can so we get Dylan back on his feet and out of the Bureau as soon as possible. I'll make sure no one mistreats him—"

"That's impossible, Em." Jesse looked even more tortured now. "People are scared of him. Even if they don't do or say anything bad, he won't be welcome. It'll hurt him. Us. You know that."

"Yes, but maybe we could try—"

“I can’t stand to see him suffer anymore—”

“We’ll find a way—”

"You can't just erase seventeen years of abuse, Emily!" Jesse raised her voice enough that it made Emily shut up immediately. Jesse flinched and took a step back as soon as she realized what it did, and she looked lost and guilty, with the weight of the world on her shoulders.

 The words hung in the air between them like a chasm, one that Emily would've gladly jumped in as soon as she realized how stupid her suggestion truly was.

"I— I'm sorry," Emily looked down, away, and anywhere but Jesse. "That was misguided on my part, I shouldn't have assumed anything without considering all the variables—"

"This is not about science." Jesse's whisper was hurt and strained, like she was making a last attempt before breaking down.

It tore at Emily's heart, and left her at a loss for words. She knew it wasn't about science. She wasn't trying to subject any of them to an experiment, like Darling would've done. It was just the way she thought: the scientific method had always been a part of how she operated, it was just natural for her brain to try to follow and apply it to, well, everything. Jesse's words made her feel like the weird, isolated kid-genius again.

"You're right," she said, quietly. 

The silence was oppressive in the seconds that came, but she didn't dare look at Jesse. She wanted to disappear somewhere and lay down uselessly until the earth took her. Poor kid genius, so smart, so unable to deal with the fact people were complex creatures, impossible to be fully understood via data. She thought she got better at doing that, being part of the world beyond the labs; she didn't. Poor kid-genius, still so detached she hurt people more than she could help them…

"What the hell are you doing!?"

Dylan's angry growl made both Jesse and Emily turn to face him, equally surprised. He looked positively murderous stomping towards them, his eyes locked at Emily.

"Why are you hurting my sister?!" He yelled.

Jesse wiped her eyes and quickly put herself on the way between them. She was always one to snap to action fast. "Dylan, she's not—"

"I felt it all the way through town!" He cut her, but stopped in front of her to analyze her expression. " What did she do, Jess ."

"It's nothing! It's nothing." Jesse inhaled. "We were just talking. She was telling me maybe we should go back."

"Back?" He furrowed his brow, looking briefly at Emily and back at his sister. "Back where? We live here!"

A part of Emily urged her to talk to him, try to make him see reason - the part who won, though, was the one that told her she'd already done enough.

"To New York, Dyl." Jesse combed her hair back with her hand, and sighed.

"New York…?" He looked lost. "Why…" Then it dawned on him. His eyes almost bulged from his face, and complete terror took hold. "She's one of them. She's one of them! No no no no…!"

The ground shook like an earthquake was starting, but with only one, concentrated displacement. They almost fell; Emily had to lean on the bench for support.

"NO!" Dylan screamed, turned around and ran.

"Dylan!" Jesse started running behind him, but she barely took two steps before a man came out of nowhere and grabbed her in an armlock. 

A man in familiar tactical gear with the FBC logo on it.

What the—

"Let me go!" Jesse roared, and a piece of the bench nearby cracked and was launched at the field agent's head, sending both him and Jesse to the floor. She untangled herself from his inert grasp and dashed after Dylan with paranatural bursts of speed, undoubtedly an effect of an OOP - the Merry-go-horse.

FBC personnel started pouring all around her. Endless agents, troopers, a couple of researchers, black cars - all of them yelling orders to go after the kids, after the Fadens. Emily didn't know where they came from or why that was happening, but she absolutely couldn't let the siblings come to harm. She had to find them first, and thankfully, none of the FBC employees seemed to even acknowledge her presence.

Please lead me to them…! Emily cried out for Polaris in her mind, and she appeared immediately, Her spiraling forms moving  outside, forwards, standing on the way like a landmark for her to follow.

—

It didn't take long before she started seeing signs of a struggle: agents on the ground, some tending to others, chunks of concrete, bent poles, pieces of wooden planks, all sorts of displaced throwable objects, blood. Lots of it. Emily passed through it all without giving the injured a second glance, and while a part of her mind wanted to make her feel guilty about it, she had much more pressing matters to tend to, and more important people to care for, if admittedly by her own biased standard.

She arrived at the front of the Fadens House after turning a corner, but not the one she’d been to - this one was old and decrepit, a mirror of the one she saw in the deserted Ordinary. Two Troopers were some steps ahead, struggling to hold a child Jesse down while she bombarded them with rocks and branches that kept knocking on their armors with strength enough to throw them off balance. She screamed and clawed at them out of rage and desperation, but no matter how strong she was, two armored people were just too much for her to deal with. A third trooper held a small Dylan off the ground - he sobbed and shook violently, calling for his sister and extending his hands without being nowhere near finding hers.

Watching that sent Emily to a place between shock and white-hot rage. Those troopers couldn't come to this place and do that to her people. Not on her watch!

"LET GO OF THEM!" she shouted, tackling the Trooper holding Dylan. It caught him off-guard, and the three of them went straight to the floor.

The man hit his back and helmet on the floor, and released Dylan on the impact. He rolled to the side and got up, completely frightened. His gaze darted  from Jesse to the Troopers to the nearby woods, at a loss for what to do.

"Run!" Jesse shouted. "I'll find you!"

Dylan hesitated a moment more, staring at Jesse. Her eyes burned with resolve and anger, a bright unnatural blue, and that was all the confirmation he needed; he turned and disappeared into the woods before one of the Troopers holding Jesse could make a run after him.

This Trooper made a mistake: he let go of Jesse. Soon he was hit on the head by a whole lamp post she was able to launch, now that more parts of her body were free. He fell unconscious instantly, and she used the same post to hit the one who was still holding her on the shoulder, making him drop her. 

The three were neutralized by the time Emily got back to her feet. Jesse was already running after Dylan again.

"Jesse wait--!" Emily knew it was futile to shout or try to catch up to her, but she tried anyway. Polaris guided her way through the woods, and when they were reaching the end of it everything got completely silent, to the point Emily lowered her pace and looked around warily.

Then the sound came.

It drilled into her mind with sharp noise and resounding words - you are a worm through time - fire bursting from inside her  - the thunder song distorts you - and red, everything was red - happiness comes - Emily knew what this was. She'd felt it before - white pearls, but red and yellow in the eye - how did the Hiss get in here?! - through a mirror, inverted is made--

Something ignited and burst out from Emily, a shockwave of sparking blue, harmonic sound, a warding energy or maybe the strongest of wills - and the ravaging presence of the Hiss was completely expelled from her mind. She fell to her knees, clutching her head, and tried to calm herself with a healthy dose of rationality. It was okay, Polaris saved her. That was Polaris, right? It felt like her. She couldn't think straight…

" Thank you…" she mumbled. "A-Are they safe?"

Polaris gave her a clear no, and that made Emily push herself up despite the dread keeping her on the ground. She started walking step by shaky step until she was confident enough to run again, and when she finally reached the end of the woods, she found an all-out battle happening between the FBC agents and a whole bunch of Hiss who appeared out of nowhere. It didn't make any sense; the city had been deserted all this time, with maybe the exception of the carnival shades the night before, so how did both the FBC and the Hiss appear? Maybe that wasn't even the right question, here; what sorts of things could be channeled and was there a limit to it? Rules? She'd been entertaining a line of thought that maybe this plane had the paranatural property of reacting to people's memories and emotions, which could explain Emily's waterfall and why the FBC appeared when Dylan realized she worked from them, but—

Polaris flashed in Emily's view, demanding haste, and brought her back to reality: they had to go after Jesse and Dylan, theories could wait. The crystals signalled they were further down the road, and Emily started surveying the area for the safest way to get there intact.

It took some time, calm and dexterity, but she found herself at the open gates of what was a dumpster. She knew immediately it was the one from Ordinary, where Jesse and Dylan played and once found the Slide Projector. It made her incredibly uneasy. Was it here, too?

" Get away from me!"

A desperate shout, unmistakably Dylan's. Emily ran inside and found the siblings backed against a pile of cubes of compressed scrap, with Jesse putting herself between danger and her shaking brother. In front of them, doctor Casper Darling had a friendly smile and his hands up in a peace gesture, but something about his body language told Emily he was going to snatch the kids as soon as they lowered their guard.

"I'm not gonna let you take my brother this time!" Jesse snarled, her eyes fixed on Darling. "Back off or I'll crush your head with a--"

Thump! It was so quick. Emily grabbed a metal pipe from the scrap, snuck closer and swung it at Darling's head. He fell like a sack of potatoes. Emily stood there for a second, breathing heavily and staring at his unconscious body until the realization that she just assaulted her ex-boss caught up to her and she dropped the pipe as if it burnt her.

"Oh christ, I never…" She shook her head, distraught, then looked down at the Fadens. "A-are you okay? Are you hurt?"

"Stay away!" Dylan shouted. "You're with them—"

"Dyl, wait, she helped!" Jesse turned to face him.

"No! I can't— Jesse please—" He looked at her, panicked, and his form shifted and distorted, bathed in red light.

Red flashed throughout the dumpster, and Hiss Sharpened appeared all over.

"Breathe, you can't let it take over..." Jesse cupped his face and spoke softly, keeping eye contact.

"I— they're going to take me… Jesse…"

"I'm here, I'm not letting this happen."

The Sharpened ran in their direction with the pickaxes up. Jesse turned and raised her hand above her head - Piles of scrap metal started floating around her, and she sent them raining down the Hiss. Oily mist was all that remained.

Emily watched as she immediately turned back to try and soothe her brother. He was still distorting in the red glow, but he looked more scared than possessed at this point. If he was the one bringing the Hiss to the place, then…

"Dylan! It's okay, I'm not getting any closer!" Emily put her hands up, took a couple of steps back and sat on the floor. "I don't mean any harm. I just want to talk."

"She's okay, Dylan, really," Jesse pleaded.

"You say that because you're in love with her," he mumbled, quite resentful, but the glow coming from him diminished considerably. "Everything has been different since she arrived."

"That's not—"

"Dylan," Emily called, and both of them turned to her. "I'm sorry I startled you. Yes, I work for the FBC, but I would never agree to have you kidnapped and locked in a cell. There's a reason Darling kept me in the dark."

"You're lying!" he growled. The red increased. "You're all the same!"

"That's not true. Jesse's not like that. She's my boss now."

Jesse raised her eyebrows, her eyes flashed with the neon blue of Polaris. She looked very threatening for an 11-years-old. 

"Jesse's not anyone's boss!"  Dylan looked at her for confirmation, but saw none. "Right…?"

"The gun chose me before I knew what was going on." Jesse said quietly, clearly ashamed. "I didn't want it."

"But that was a good thing!" Emily added. "She'd never been able to get to you otherwise!"

Dylan shook his head, clearly distraught with this new information. "It doesn't matter, we aren't in that terrible place anymore!" 

For the second time, he saw the hesitation in his sister's eyes. He opened his mouth to ask, but he couldn't; she was also quiet. Emily wouldn't let it remain in this stalemate, if only to prevent a chasm between them when she felt she really was the one to blame.

"It's part of your sleep, I'm afraid. A dream." She felt awful saying the words. She was literally breaking his illusions and there was no way to make that sound okay. "Or another dimension. Or both, it's unclear. The important part is that we have to go back - so you can wake up, heal and get away from the House."

"But I don't want to go back! I already have everything I need!" he shot back, frantic, his eyes darting from Emily to Jesse. 

"It's not real—"

"And what difference does that make?!" he screamed and suddenly, for the first time, he was at his correct age: an adult with tears streaming down his face. "I'm happy here, why would I trade it for that place that destroyed me?!"

There was so much red now. It radiated in waves from him, distorted everything it touched. Hiss started appearing again, all sorts of it: Guards, Agents, Sharpened, Charged, Elevated, Troopers… There was no way Jesse could deal with all of those before some got to them, especially Emily. So she didn't; She turned and tackled Dylan in a hug.

A flash of blue light and spinning fractals exploded from her, obliterating the Hiss resonance in its path. The newly-summoned Hiss dissipated into technicolor smoke that temporarily obscured Emily's view with how dense it was. When she could see again, Jesse was also back at her adult self, and she was holding tight to Dylan, who had his face hidden on her chest. He sobbed uncontrollably; she was quiet in her crying. They both looked absolutely worn out.

"We're not going anywhere, bro," Jesse mumbled to him. "The Report can't take you away, remember? It doesn't work."

Emily's eyes got wide. They tried to use the Report before and it didn't work?!

"B-but you-- you won't stop talking about her," Dylan's voice was failing. "You're going to leave me and go away with her, won't you?"

" Never. " Jesse pulled away slightly, enough to be able to look him straight in the eye. "Never, Dylan. You're the most important person in the whole world to me. I'm going wherever you are, and nothing or no one will change that." 

"Jesse…!" He held onto her like a castaway to his salvation, and she was content with that. It was all that she wanted: to be his safe port in the middle of the storm.

Emily realized she made a bigger mistake than telling them they should go back. As she watched the way they clung to each other and cried, she realized she had been so focused on finding Jesse and then taking her back that she didn't consider Dylan. She assumed Jesse would convince him, because going back was the right thing to do and she knew how to best talk to her brother, or he would come willingly, because surely the waken world would be better than whatever was going on in his dreams.

She was such a fool. 

"I'm going back," she said, finally.

Jesse raised her head, but she didn't turn. "We're not going with you."

It hurt. The statement, of course, but most of all, the broken way Jesse said it twisted the knife in her heart. 

"I know," Emily replied. "How do you want me to handle things when I'm back at the bureau?"

"What?" Jesse turned to look at her over her shoulder. She couldn't hide how much she was crying, now. 

The knife, twisting again.

"We never did enough for you." Emily used the last of her composure to stand tall and look at her. "And you gave so much." She smiled, sadly. "I'll go back and take care of things - you just have to tell me how."

"Emily…"

"So tell me ma'am, Director Faden - should I establish a way of communicating with you and asking for advice, or--"

"No." Jesse shook her head. "Focus on the Hiss. Eradicate them. Lift the lockdown."

Emily nodded. "I'll do it. I'll make you proud."

"You already have." Jesse’s voice faltered.

"I—" 

Dylan raised a hand in her direction as if launching something at her. Emily felt herself being pulled away from the floor, from the Fadens - from reality. She was stretched, squeezed through space and time. She saw the places she'd been, the people she talked to in her quest - all those iterations of Jesse and their circumstances: a glimpse of a Jesse fixing a generator with Dylan holding a flashlight by her side; a Jesse sitting on a bed in a psychiatric ward, drawing a black pyramid on a notebook; The Board Room in the FBC, Jesse discussing and almost arguing with the Old Guard she just saved from Trench opening the portal to the Hiss; a Jesse talking excitedly with Emily's parents on the balcony of her father's apartment.

The endless glittering and prisms of Polaris.

The ceiling of an office in the FBC, and the beeping of medical equipment.

As Emily slowly realized she was back to her own reality, she found she was drained and catatonic. The words were still stuck in her throat, making it hard to breathe.

I love you. I love you.

--

Chapter Text

"Pope? Pope, c'mon."

Emily woke up with someone shaking her shoulder lightly. She raised her head from her arms and saw Arish with a tired but gentle smile.

"It's late. You should go to bed."

She nodded, her head bobbing forward a little too much before she caught herself. He helped her get up and provided an arm to steady and help her walk.

"It would do you good to get more rest. You're running yourself ragged."

It was incredibly easy to refute his claim. She only needed to state how he did exactly the same thing, but she didn't have the drive to do it. It wasn't worth it. Arish was only trying to help.

"Here we are, safe and sound!" he chuckled, affectionate, as they arrived at the cot in the back of the room. "Look, Emily…" He adopted a more serious tone and put both his hands on Emily's shoulders. "I know the doctors want to keep you close and all, but staying this close to Faden and her brother, it's not good for you. Wells agrees with me. You could stay at his infirmary in the shelter."

Emily took a glance towards the cell beside them, the Fadens in their sleep inside. She focused back on Arish. "I know. Thank you for worrying, but I'm not going anywhere. I want to be here. It keeps me focused."

He pressed his lips together. "It keeps you fixated and overworking yourself, Emily. You know that."

Two weeks ago she would've been appalled by the bluntness of it, even if it was true. She'd try to win him with words and rationality, and she'd end up convincing herself as well. Now, she didn't care as much. "I set alarms to take care of my basic functions. I won't collapse."

He shifted awkwardly and blew some air out. "Oh boy, that's not what I meant."

"That's what matters, though. We're making progress." She turned to the cot, putting an end to the conversation. "Thank you for the help."

"Right. I, uh, will be at the usual spot if you need anything." He started walking away, but stopped. "And Pope? Don't listen to those idiots. We know it wasn't your fault."

She didn't turn to watch him leave, only heard the sound of the doors as she climbed on the cot. It wasn't her fault… Technically not, but she didn't help, either. 

There were so many questions when Emily came back. Everybody wanted to know what happened, where she'd been, what she'd done. Most of all, they wanted to know about Director Faden. She had to tell them she made contact but failed to reach her, and she had her orders. A half truth, carrying the relevant message intact: Jesse wanted them to focus on eradicating the Hiss, and that would be their priority.

It had been two weeks since Emily woke up. She had spent a couple of days recovering from more than a week in a paranatural slumber that, as she learned, drained her vital forces. She got briefed on what happened during her absence and the state of the current research endeavors. She got to work, despite the medics' protests. It kept her so busy she didn't have time or energy to deal with the beast lurking inside her, and that was for the best; she was fully aware she couldn’t deal with it yet. That didn't mean she tried to forget, oh no.

Emily's strategy was simple: she'd work at the Hiss research until it was too much, and when she couldn't look at it anymore she'd go back to the room with the glass cell, sit at her desk and let her mind run wild trying to piece together both the functioning of the Report, the alternate realities and why the Fadens didn't seem to be drained by the AI as she was. She'd often find herself on the verge of searching for ways to contact and/or help the Fadens in their bubble, but she'd catch herself in time and turn back. Jesse had told her not to do it and she'd honor that, as worried as she was about them. She really wished they were okay, though...

How could she mess up this badly?

Emily pulled the standard-issue FBC blanket over her and stared at the ceiling. Her nights were all dreamless since she returned. Would she feel better or worse if she dreamed this night? Would it change anything?

This was fruitless mind chatter, of course. There were better ways to use her brain power, like reviewing the specifics of the black rock frequency emitters they were to prototype soon, or making a list of the topics she wanted to discuss with Langston for a cell the next day.

She did none of those things, as a flash of light on the corner of her eye caught her attention, and she found herself looking at the glass cell once more.

Polaris was there. Her spinning prisms hovered over the siblings like a protective field, slow but unwavering. She'd been like this for all of these days. 

Emily couldn't feel her anymore. It bothered her a lot; Polaris was the only person who really understood what Emily was going through, and now she was there, but dead silent. Whatever enabled her to get a ride on Emily's mind wasn't present anymore, that much was clear, so why could she still see her? Why couldn't Polaris answer?

Maybe it's just that I'm not cut from the same cloth as Jesse and Dylan . That would make sense, Emily thought, feeling her body heavy on the thin mattress. Can you hear me?

There was no response, vocal or otherwise.

As I thought…

The door slammed open.

"Dr. Pope! Dr. Pope!" The urgency made Emily rise from the bed, leaning on her elbows. A young man she knew as Researcher Thompson stopped in front of the glass cell, looking around for her. "The ranger squad in Maintenance sent word for you — they acquired a Hiss specimen!"

"What?!" Emily sat up properly this time and the man finally realized she was behind the cell. "A living one?"

"It sounded like it, doctor!"

"That's great! Go call Dr. Saba and Dr. Bronte, please, we'll need them." Her mind snapped back into work mode, fully alert. "Can you help me stand?"

—

About thirty minutes later a small group of researchers waited near the NSC Control Point as the rangers dragged in a Hiss Guard extensively tied up inside a mail cart. Two of the rangers never took their eyes and crosshairs off of it, while a third pushed the cart and three others kept guard around them. The closer they got to the control point, the more frantic the Hiss became, hitting the sides of the cart as it tried to break free.

"Where do you want us to put it, doc?" asked the Ranger leading the others.

"I want you to place it on the control point and hold it there." Emily gestured to the researchers beside her and their equipment. "We want to understand why they avoid them after the cleansing process."

"Right, but I'll have to ask you to take some distance, this is hardly safe."

"I understand."

The researchers stepped back to their equipment behind a stack of metal crates, pens and paper at the ready. The rangers brought the cart up to the elevation, knocked it down to the side and rolled the tied Hiss Guard to the middle of the control point, all of them with weapons trained at it.

For a second, nothing happened besides deeply unsettling flailing from the Hiss Guard. Then it let out a screech that turned more and more distorted as it shook faster, unnaturally - it floated up in the air, leaking thick resonance mist like it was disintegrating, and there was a flash of silver light - a high-pitched sound, prismatic shapes expanding outwards, a burst of energy - and the Hiss was gone, completely dissipated.

Emily stood there with her jaw on the floor, taking a moment to fully process that she not only saw the manifestation of Polaris appear, it also obliterated a hiss-corrupted person.

All around her, scientists and Rangers erupted into chatter, trying to understand what just happened, comparing notes, and analyzing the data from the equipment.

She's got you in the veins of the House, Emily thought to herself, reverent. Can your pulse help us? Can you flood this place and push the Hiss out?

There was a glimmer of prismatic light, the softest whisper of chimes soothing Emily's inner turmoil. She smiled faintly. It wasn't the same thing as having Polaris in her mind, but it was nice to be able to see and feel her presence as a guardian. 

She turned to the team of researchers by her side. "Did you observe a refractive light effect following the vaporization?"

Dr. Bronte, a very friendly black woman, shook her head. "Negative, only sound. We got the frequency recorded."

So it's still just me.

"What about the video feed? And the paraenergy gauge? Signal processing?"

"All recording."

"Right. Keep monitoring the control point and the surroundings for an hour, see if anything changes. We'll go over the results tomorrow. Good night." Emily nodded in acknowledgement and walked slowly with her borrowed cane towards the sector elevator.

"Emily, wait!" Dr. Bronte caught up to Emily and offered her arm. "I can walk you to the elevator. Maintenance is tricky to navigate."

"At least it's better than the staircase hell of Central Research," Emily joked. She took Dr. Bronte’s arm. They walked in silence until they got to the elevator hall, when Dr. Bronte cleared her throat. 

"Excuse my bluntness, Emily, but how are you faring?"

"I'm recovering as expected. Wells says I'll be walking in a satisfactory manner within two weeks."

"I'm glad to hear that, but I was referring to your mental state. I'm worried about you - not as a coworker, but as a friend. You've been pushing yourself to the breaking point, just like you used to do when Darling upset you, except you’re doing it constantly now." Bronte looked into Emily's eyes with a grave, concerned expression. "Whatever happened within that AI isn't worth burning yourself for."

Emily knew Bronte meant well. They'd always had a good relationship, both having entered the FBC at roughly the same time, sharing experiences and working together on several projects, so Emily could say for certain where the concern came from. Meaning well wasn't the same thing as understanding, though, and Emily didn't see a way of explaining her actions without revealing too much about topics she didn't want to discuss with anyone.

"I made a promise, Paula. With every hour I work, I might lower the death toll in the end, if only a bit."

"You're going to be part of that count, at this rate." Paula raised her eyebrows, hoping her expression drove the point across. "You need to rest. Your brain is at its best when your body is healthy as well, and that's worth a day off."

"I had too many." Emily looked to the elevator and pressed her lips in a thin line. "I'd better go now. My thoughts are starting to blur out of drowsiness."

"Of course." Paula nodded, but she didn't look very satisfied with how the conversation went. Emily was sure she'd try to convince her again in a couple of days. "Let me call you the elevator…"

The ride back to Central Executive was a mix of Emily trying to process what happened and come up with hypotheses for the incident with the Hiss on the control point. Her mind drifted away to random topics while she struggled holding her head up, almost falling asleep. She thought of waveforms and energetic spread when suddenly she realized she'd switched gears completely and was thinking about how soft the bed in her apartment was.

She sighed, leaning the back of her head against the wall of the elevator.

What a day.

Her passage through the sector on her way to her cot was automatic. Her brain sputtered nonsense about resonance, screens and incantations, the House curving in on itself, a fractal of planes of existence where she could hop over and over and never get to Jesse again. The feeling of impending doom, the painful awareness she was pushing/punishing herself. She stopped with her hands on the thin mattress on the cot and looked to the side, to the glass cell where the Fadens still laid unresponsive. She felt her chest tighten.

Arish is right. This is masochism.

She laid down and, exhausted as she was, it didn't take long for sleep to take her. No dreams came, as usual, but she’d wake up calm the next morning, with the impression she’d been somewhere else, drifting in space.

—

The sound of the waterfall was comforting. It filled Jesse's mind, gave her something to focus on; it made her stop thinking.

Yet, when Dylan set foot on the bridge, she knew it. She was attuned to his presence on a very fine level, since everything went down. It was necessary. She had to be there for him when he panicked, and even though it was happening far less now, they almost lost the whole city because of it. Plus, dealing with the Hiss was very annoying.

Jesse was sitting on the edge of the bridge, legs dangling in the air, arms crossed on the lower bars of the railing. Dylan approached with his heavy steps, causing ripples in Jesse's perception, and she tried to put on a smile. She knew that would probably translate into a weird grimace or she’d fail completely, and there wasn’t much she could do about it. She hoped it wouldn’t become a problem.

"You're here again." 

She didn't look at him at first, but she didn't need to see his face to notice the annoyance and reproval in his words. They were very clear already.

"I'm just taking a moment," she replied. "Do you need anything?"

"Yes." The sound and the vibration on the railing meant he leaned on it. "I want to talk."

Jesse turned to him, brow creased. He looked angry, as always, maybe a little upset being there. Her paranatural empathy painted him as a whirlwind - everything wild and crashing and bumping on the inside. Was he about to throw this chaos at her?

"So, uh. You're sad. It's impossible not to notice." He had a little scowl as he talked, and it probably wasn't intentional. The slow way he was doing it, though, was definitely him trying to choose his words. 

Jesse kept looking at him, unsure of his point. He grunted in annoyance for having to go on.

"What do I need to do? To make it go away, I mean."

She'd been bracing for a fight, accusations or desperation, but not for an offer of help. It took her off guard.

"It— It's nothing. It's going to pass," she stuttered.

"Well, you being here— " he gestured around " —isn't going to help."

"I like it. It's peaceful."

"It's hers ," he shot back.

They looked at each other for a whole moment, the aggressive note hanging between them. Jesse felt as if she had a living critter going down her throat. 

"That doesn't change anything," she said quietly, but upholding his gaze.

"Maybe not, but I don't like seeing you like this. We should unmake this place and make something better in turn. Something that makes you happy, like… Oh, I know!" He opened a big smile "You like plants, right? You told me how you talked to them and they revived, we could have a whole greenhouse — or maybe a park!" His face lit up with the possibilities. "A park with a greenhouse full of the coolest plants. Do you like flowers? I remember mom used to have these pretty little yellow ones, I don't know how they're called…"

"Dandelions, I think." Jesse smiled at the memory. 

"Really? Like the puffy things?"

"Yeah. She'd get really mad if we accidentally squashed them— like that time we were playing soccer, remember? We hid our ball and blamed the deers…"

"Oh god, yes!" Dylan bent forward and laughed. "She saw right through it and ouch, the beating hurt for the rest of the day…"

It might be considered weird how they took this moment of a relatively bad childhood event and held it before them with giggles and a somewhat distant longing, but one look at how their lives went afterwards was enough to contextualize it: there was so much pain and suffering that this was something they could remember fondly of. At least this pain was simple, and ended after some rest. The things that hurt them afterwards left wounds for life.

"I think I'd like flowers," Jesse said finally, chuckling. She didn't know how much she liked them, actually, but she also didn't know about her affinity for plants before she did that task for Ahti; might as well learn. "But I don't want to destroy this place."

Dylan frowned, and part of his levity evaporated. "Jesse. She only fucked things up."

"That's not true."

"No? Half of our city's gone because she had to come and threaten to take us back to hell!"

"Emily didn't threaten us." Jesse raised her voice above a whisper for the first time and it was affirming, but not chastising. "She was concerned with what happened in her world—"

"Well blow it to pieces, I don't care!" He opened his arms wide in frustration. Jesse flinched, and when he realized it, he exhaled, leaned down and reached for her. "Sorry... It's just so frustrating! We finally have our place with everything we deserve and then she comes around and makes everything fall apart!"

"It wasn't her fault—"

"Of course it was! Or did you want to remember that stuff, Miss Director?" He all but spat the word. "When were you going to tell me that, by the way?"

Jesse carded her fingers through her hair, pursed her lips and shook her head in a negative. "I don't know. I never… Why would it matter here?"

"See! You wanted to forget!" He pointed at her like he'd just caught her red-handed in a crime. "But oh no, it's not your precious girlfriend's fault—"

"Dylan, fuck off, okay?!" she shouted. 

He was taken aback. She used that moment to get up and look at him, eyes alight with pain and a little despair, like a cornered wolf. 

Dylan didn't understand that reaction, by the way he looked dumbfounded. "What—"

" Don't " She hissed. " Don't start! Just give me a moment, okay?! I need to be alone right now. We'll talk later."

He blinked a couple of times, opened his mouth, thought better and closed it, and finally simply nodded in an irked acknowledgement. 

Jesse turned her back to him and walked further away on the bridge. He bit his tongue not to provoke her further - but he wanted to, oh he did - and walked with heavy steps to the opposite direction.

How could Jesse not see that that woman ruined everything? She couldn't be that much of a fool for someone who literally worked for the enemy. How could they even get along, in the first place?

—

Emily looked at the white board and bit her lip, deep in thought. Half of it was covered in calculations that were so complex they bordered on nonsense, and the other half was covered in rambling about amplifying hedron resonance through the control points, which could also be taken as almost nonsense for anyone not familiar with her train of thought. Luckily, the small team of researchers around her were sharp and pretty well versed on the discussion, as they were the ones helping her draw useful conclusions from the event the night before.

Dr. Saba proposed for them to move an HRA tower to the nearest control point in Executive to study the effects of one over the other, while Dr. Bronte argued they wouldn't be able to produce them in a big enough quantity to suppress the Hiss for good. Dr. Higa was midway through her argument that they should isolate pockets of Hiss resonance when a security officer knocked and came into the Board Room, looking pretty tense.

"Sorry to interrupt you, ma'am, but those researchers are trying to cause trouble again, and they're demanding you come out and talk to them."

The guard didn't even need to use that tone for Emily to know who he was talking about. She closed eyes tight, opened them and sighed before turning to face him. "They'll wait until we finish here. We're doing important work."

"Important work - ha, what a joke!"

Three people came forward from behind the guard: a man with his greying hair gelled back, followed by a woman with dark hair tied in a high bun and a wheat-blond younger man who looked very anxious. They stood at the far end of the meeting table while Emily and her team were on the other side, and one group looked at the other like they were about to start a shootout.

"Exactly, Dr. Anderson, important work - the same you should be doing were you not standing right here about to give me a piece of your mind." Emily said cooly, putting the cap back on the marker she'd been using on the whiteboard.

"Well, I don't— we don't like how you work." Anderson, the older man and clearly the leader, crossed his arms. "Or that you took over the boardroom like it's yours, or the fact you were the only one to come back from the AI-induced dream with suspiciously well-timed instructions from the Director giving you power!"

Paula Bronte started to form an answer, but Emily raised a hand to stop her. That trio was a thorn in her side and her patience ran thin that day. "Doctors, please keep going with our meeting. I'll take this outside." 

She walked towards the door with the most dignified walk she could muster with her cane, and the coldest expression. She motioned for them to follow her out, and as soon as the door closed behind them, she turned to address them properly. “It surprises me that you’d finally come to my face with your claims. Took you long enough.” When the three of them reacted with surprise, she wanted badly to roll her eyes but decided to keep staring, unfazed. “Please. You don’t really think you were being subtle with your dissatisfaction, do you? Alas, in the interest of settling this matter once and for all, do list your concerns. I will address them to the best of my capabilities."

Anderson took a glance at his colleagues, as if to assure himself they were still by his side, and cleared his throat. "We don't like how things are being handled by you. You should be working to get the Director back, not come up with a half-assed excuse to give yourself more power!" 

"Yes!" The woman of the group, a researcher called Haley Ernie - who Emily clearly remembered by having taken her copy of a record of the Hiss incantation without her permission - took a step forward. "Director Faden is the only one who can cause significant damage to the Hiss lines so far. We need her! We can't afford focusing on research without her protection!"

Emily waited patiently while both of them kept talking in circles about how Jesse was their best option and Emily was a fool for believing otherwise. She didn't even scoff or roll her eyes, despite her growing desire to do so. When both of them had finished for a second already and were starting to feel uncomfortable with her silence, that was when she raised an eyebrow and spoke towards the blond, anxious researcher on the back. "Aren't you going to say anything?" 

"They, uh, covered it already." He looked anywhere but at her.

She frowned. "I don't think I caught your name. You're from acoustics, aren't you?"

"Yes ma'am, I'm Oliver Blake, junior researcher." 

"Pleased to meet you. I'd like to talk later, when you have a moment." Emily gave him a little nod, then directed her attention back to the other two. "If that's all, let me start by asking two simple questions: Do you see any sign that I have claimed the Service Weapon for myself? Do you think the Board would just let me upstage the Director?"

The researchers exchanged a quick look.

"Don't take me for a fool, Pope! There's more than one way to gain power, and this paranatural coma fits your goals like a glove—"

"The fitting paranatural coma that greatly debilitated me, you mean." Emily hit her cane on the floor twice, calling attention to the fact she was still recovering. "I don't need to take you for a fool, Dr. Anderson; you're clearly doing that for yourself."

"You had to make your act believable somehow, but we know the truth! " Anderson kept talking, his face beet red with irritation. "You've latched onto the Director's arm since we climbed out of that shelter - you're a shameless opportunist, Pope! First Darling, then Faden—"

Emily tilted her head curiously, a glint of understanding passing through her eyes. So that's it, huh. That's where his grudge came from.

"--and now you're the one giving orders! How does it feel to throw the Director under the bus and take power for yourself?!"

Emily raised an eyebrow and scoffed. "I'd love to know where you are finding evidence of your claim - unless, of course, you think a Head of Research is overstepping by telling their staff to do their jobs."

"Not their jobs, no, but you're so quick to discard your friend , aren't you? The Director was your friend, is what you said? The Director told us to focus on the Hiss." He imitated a feminine voice, dripping disdain on his tone. "Bullshit! If you cared about her you would've brought her back, not left her to rot while you steal the spotlight to end the Hiss yourself!"

"You are delusional—"

"But you liked her so much, didn't you?! Did you even have the time to get into her pants?!"

He only realized he was shouting when Central Executive became dead silent, everyone staring at them, often with huge eyes. Haley Ernie looked like she wanted to be swallowed by a house shift on the spot, and Oliver Blake looked frozen between surprise and disbelief at what he heard.

The accusations left Emily standing there in disbelief with her mouth slightly open. She closed it, narrowed her eyes and took a breath, her nostrils flaring. "I have taken your behavior as a professional divergence so far, something to be embraced and discussed in true scientific fashion, in order for both of us to learn from the experience. This, however, surpasses every limit of both appropriate behavior and my good will." Emily's tone was sharp, clear, assertive, downright intimidating - and her eyes were worse. "I will not tolerate you insulting my honor, my loyalty and my intentions. Even though I'm not and don't plan to be the Director, Dr. Anderson, you'll find it’s well within my authority to assign you wherever I judge it to be more beneficial to our research. As of now it's at the Mold threshold aiding Dr. Underhill, effective immediately."

"What?!" His face was a mix of outrage and fear; no one liked the Mold threshold, even after the Director eradicated the main source of it. Add Underhill to that, and it was probably the most undesirable place in the bureau for any researcher. "That's bullshit!"

"You're free to take your concerns to Director Faden, the Report AI is still functional." Emily didn’t spare him another glance, and instead searched for Arish in his usual spot by the stairs. She found him very dumbfounded with the whole situation, midway to giving a file to a guard. "Arish, can you please get someone to take him there? I know Central Research has been relatively safe, but I'm not taking any chances."

He blinked his surprise away and nodded. "Of course! I, uh, will call a couple of rangers for this."

"Thank you kindly." Her whole demeanor softened, but only for a second. "As for you, Dr. Ernie, you’re now in charge of figuring out how to contact the Director without having the need to dream-hop through the means of AI. Refer to the contents of the box labeled 489 in the room where we’re keeping the Director for a start. I expect a report of your progress by the end of the week."

“But— !!”

Emily turned to Oliver Blake. “Please follow me inside.”

She proceeded to try and re-enter the board room, but Anderson grabbed her arm. “Now listen here, you—”

“Hey stop that!” Blake put himself between him and Emily, barring his way and trying to push him away, but even then he kept holding.

“GET AWAY FROM HER!” Arish shouted, pistol ready as he started running the stairs. “Get. Away. From her. NOW!”

Anderson saw Arish, then the pistol, and went very pale. “Don’t shoot!” He immediately let go of Emily’s arm and raised his hands in surrender.

“You’re a coward, Anderson!” Arish growled, his usually gentle expression twisted in anger. “I should throw you into a cell for grabbing her like that!”

“I leave it to your discretion, chief.” Emily's voice shook a little, her eyes were wide still, but she held herself together and raised her head high. “Seems like I overestimated his civility towards women.”

Arish nodded, then grabbed Anderson’s arms and twisted them behind his torso.so he could drive him forward safely. “You’re going for a day in the empty shelter, let’s see if it does you some good.”

Emily didn’t stay to see them leaving Central Executive under the shocked gazes of the rest of the staff. She made a motion for Oliver to follow and entered the Board Room, the familiar light and smell helping soothe her nerves somewhat. Unfortunately, her team of researchers was also staring worriedly, probably having heard muffled shouts from the other side, and she wasn’t all that eager to inform them of what happened.

“Are you okay, ma’am?” Oliver asked quietly. “If you need a moment I can wait.”

“No, no, it’s alright.” Emily ran her fingers through her hair, looked up and then back towards him. "I wanted to know what led you to band together with them…”

Working was Emily's way to get her head off things that would shake her. Rationality and routine were her friends, they let her slip into a role so ingrained it was second nature by now, and more importantly, one that let her function beyond the strength of whatever feelings she might be experiencing. That time wasn't different: she was fully into research mode as she talked to Oliver and ultimately concluded he was new and still rather inexperienced at the office drama of the Bureau, which absolved him of a punishment harsher than a word of advice. What she did instead was ask for his help with their current Hiss predicament, since he was very well versed in the field of acoustics, way more than the scientists currently present - or anyone else of those who survived the Hiss, for that matter. 

Hours of discussions over the data they acquired with the control point event passed, and they agreed to take a break to eat and clear their minds. Emily stood in the Board Room, too absorbed in her diagrams and calculations to give up on her train of thought, but Arish brought her food and stood there until she ate it, lest she forgot and passed out hours later. More debate followed, then experimentation, another look over the concrete data and samples of the Hiss they acquired over the lockdown. They had a lot of things they were willing to try, but no precise lead to follow in order to systematically wipe out the Hiss.

By the end of the day, Emily sat on her desk in the glass cell room, watching as a doctor conducted yet another health test on the Fadens. The man scribbled the results on his clipboard, mumbling to himself, and started retrieving his equipment. Emily knew by his relaxed demeanor he didn't find anything unusual in the readings, and while this was nice, she wondered if getting deviations would mean they were going to wake up soon - or die...

She shook this thought as fast as it came. They were being nourished by something, almost like they were in stasis; death was very unlikely. Her mind then urged her to calculate the numbers, but she forbade it vehemently.

Polaris still spun around Jesse’s head like a halo.

Emily wished the Fadens were okay in their pretend world. She didn't hold their decision against them, in fact it was logical, given their lives so far and how things went. They deserved happiness, even if it meant they were alone in a fake city and that absolutely wasn't healthy in the long run. 

I hope they're okay right now , Emily thought. 

She wasn't okay, though. The stress ate at her as she dove into work to make sure they got the Hiss erased as soon as possible. And, of course, she was heartbroken. 

Are you waiting for them— for her to come back, Pope? For you?

There it came, the self-loathing knife. She knew it was a trap and she shouldn’t give in to these trains of thought, but she couldn’t help but wonder - was she? Was she trying to get a solution to the Hiss invasion in such a destructive way because she had some sort of twisted hope that Jesse would come back if she managed to do it?

She knew these sorts of things didn’t happen in reality, and that Jesse’s priority was and would always be Dylan. She wouldn’t leave him for anything in the world, and Emily wouldn’t impose anything of the sort. The very idea was abhorrent to her. Still… her mind wandered to the kiss on the red dunes of Jesse’s memory of Hedron, the way Jesse looked at her, how she seemed to be so happy…

Emily sighed heavily. This was madness. She couldn’t compare affections, it was wrong on so many levels. Her mind wanted to send her further down a pit she couldn’t deal with.

That thing they had, it was real. It was so fleeting, though, like a dream you want to go back to, but you’re already too awake. Did she want to go back? Yes. She had things to do in the world of the awake, though. For everyone’s sake.

—

It was raining in the city. Dylan liked rain, it usually reminded him of when he was a kid and ran out in the middle of downpours to play in the puddles. Now, though, it annoyed him; He knew the rain was responding to Jesse's mood. She was sitting depressed on the rooftop, like she was the protagonist of one of those cheap romance movies their mother liked so much. Was she doing this to make him feel guilty? If she wanted him to reconsider going back to the world once more, the answer would still be a resounding no. He hated seeing her so sad, though, and the fact he didn’t know what to do about it gnawed at him. There must be something! Things were going so well before that stupid woman—

No , he told himself, don’t think about her. Try not to bring her up, or Jesse will snap at you again.

Soon he was standing on the rooftop under an umbrella, carrying another one for his sister. He got close and opened this second one, holding it over Jesse. When she looked up and back, confused, he gave her an annoyed look that he didn't really mean. “You’re going to bloat like a corpse in a lake if you stay in the rain much longer.”

She creased her brow and stared at him. “That’s one hell of a comparison.”

“Good, so let’s get inside. I’ll make you hot chocolate.” Dylan pointed back with his head. He wasn't going to make anything as much as conjure the beverage out of the ether, but it was the thought that counted, right?

Jesse’s expression went from surprise to affectionate and then somewhat bittersweet. “Thanks, but I’ll stay here. I don’t want to ruin the mood inside.”

“You’re doing it by staying and becoming a raisin.” He rolled his eyes. “I know you’re sad, it’s painfully obvious. It would be better if you were sad inside, though, dry and tucked into a blanket. I don't want to have to take care of you when you get sick.”

“Who are you and what did you do to Dylan Faden?” she joked.

“Ha ha, very funny. Hold your own umbrella, funnygirl, I’m tired.” He let go of the umbrella and Jesse caught it immediately with her telekinesis. Show off.

She didn’t brag about it, though. She bit her lip, an anxious mannerism, and took a deep breath. “Listen… Sorry I yelled at you before. Today hasn’t been very good.”

"Clearly." He shrugged. "And I'm not going to lie, seeing you this upset because of a freaking Bureau goon makes me—"

"'Bureau goon, Dylan? Really? " Jesse interrupted, sour.

"--very angry." He matched her expression. "But we're safe here, so there's no reason for us to fight about it anymore. She's gone."

That wasn't the right thing to say. Jesse recoiled like he slapped her face, but she held her reaction at the end, reverting to the blank expression she used when things were bad. Dylan felt the needle of guilt in his stomach; he wasn't trying to make things worse, damn! How could he save this? Sure, that Pope woman was nice enough, but the fact that she worked for the Bureau was unforgivable - they were all bastards! How could Jesse not see that she'd get a knife to the back? Polaris made her and Dylan different, and the only thing those people wanted was to lock them up and make them their lab rats!

While he mulled over the matter of saving the conversation, Jesse was quiet. She took a moment looking away and moving her chin absentmindedly, as she often did when she was thinking hard about something. What the hell was the matter? Dylan wanted to ask, but he was afraid of restarting a fight. He didn't want to push Jesse away, but he wasn't good at keeping things inside, either.

Would she choose them, instead of him?

"It's… not about Emily, Dylan. Or not entirely, at least," Jesse said slowly, as gently as she could, turning her whole body to face him. There was a sort of apprehension in her eyes, a touch of pleading as well.

Dylan tilted his head and said nothing, waiting for her to go on, anticipating something bad. What was she trying to convince him about this time?

"I was thinking about loneliness and people. You've been in that cage for so long, Dylan, it breaks my heart. I don't want this place to become another cage, not for me or for you." Dylan opened his mouth to reply but she wasn't done yet, she rushed to make her point. "Maybe we need to go out and find some place far away where no one knows us, and meet some people. Try to have a life, and— and learn the world doesn't need to be terrible, and— I don't know, heal a little, away from all this?" Jesse was talking fast, almost tripping on her words. She was afflicted.

Did she fear Dylan wouldn't listen? She shouldn't be worried about that, he was paying attention. Yet, he felt his jaw lock with her words.

"I'd do it Dylan, I'd resign so fast and deal with whatever shit the Board threw at me if you wanted to get away. Maybe we could get a van and live in it? Travel the world together, like we wanted when we were kids?"

She smiled, breathless, and looked at him full of a fragile hope. He was a wall, though. "You were the one who wanted that. I just wanted to be around you." Dylan thought it was disheartening how Jesse was trying to justify this to herself. She really believed it. "Then I got locked up all these years waiting for you to come and when you do, you call me your cage ?"

"Of course not!" Jesse looked almost offended by his train of thought. "I'm just saying that's something we have to consider eventually, and we still have to talk about a lot—"

"What, so you can drag your girlfriend along and replace me?" He shot, feeling his mood sour even more. "Or maybe run to her arms when troublesome Dylan becomes too much?"

"No! What the hell are you talking about?!" Jesse scoffed and blinked a couple of times, speechless at his accusations. "Dylan, I chose you! I'd always choose you, you know that!"

"Then where were you when they got me?!"

Everything stopped in their city. The rain halted mid fall, the drops hanging in the air. The winds, heavy a second before, couldn't be felt anymore. A thunderbolt arched its way to a different cloud somewhere in the distance.

Jesse Faden gasped quietly, and Dylan could feel the despair hitting her like a truck through their link.

"I ran away," she whispered, "I heard you screaming, I—" her voice failed, she looked away, then back, then away again. She was disoriented, mortified. "I should've stayed."

Jesse's despair was Dylan's despair as well. Both of them would never forget that day, that whole thread of events that started with a curious find in Ordinary's dump. His sister left him. After everything they went through, the otherworldly things they saw and kept at bay, she got scared of the Bureau and decided saving her own hide was better than saving her brother. He had a lot of time to resent her for that, in the long, long years he spent waiting for her to show up. Casper said she could come, and yet she didn't... It was only natural, wasn't it? Dylan had always been quiet and bad at dealing with the world, of course she'd end up dumping him. Now she was finding excuses to do it again, because he was too much: a failure, a burden, a danger , as he heard often in his cage. She didn't need someone like him.

Blue prisms made of light danced in his vision, startling him out of his downward spiral. Her . He knew Polaris was present, even if she apparently was being careful to remain out of his perception. He could still feel her faintly in Jesse's head through their link. Likewise, he'd always catch Jesse changing expressions out of the blue while she probably talked to her, but Polaris never dared contact him directly after he let the Hiss in to drive her out, except for now. She broadcast deep grief to him, a desire to make him stop with that train of thought. It made him incredibly angry - of course she'd appear to make him stop thinking the truth about Jesse, wouldn't she? Her favorite... After all, what did Polaris give him, in the end? Nothing!

Get out of my head! He screamed mentally.

"Dylan…" Jesse pleaded.

"No! No, I won't take her back. Fuck her!" A flash of red light illuminated his whole profile for a second, without a clear source. Any remnant of Polaris's presence vanished from his mind, and the start of a headache took its place along with a hissing noise so familiar it immediately brought him chills. Get the fuck away, you too!

"I'm sorry." Jesse looked down at her hands.

Time resumed its course, and the rain fell heavier than before. Jesse's umbrella clattered to the side and was dragged away by the wind, without her keeping it steady with her powers.

"I'm sorry" was all she was able to say.

Silence.

His anger began to subside as he saw - and felt - how big the pain and guilt that surfaced in Jesse was. She looked older and devoid of strength, barely keeping herself from slipping to the floor.

She was genuine in her apologies. She'd been apologizing since she found him again in those raw, yet unshaped lands, and he believed her. How could he not, when he could feel her with such strength?

Why did he want to hurt her with the one thing that crushed her? What was the goal, punishing her? That was it? Making her feel how much he was hurting all this time? It didn't bring him the satisfaction he would've hoped for. In fact, it made him miserable, seeing her like that.

He loved Jesse. Why did he have to go and do that?! Why did he destroy everything and everyone around him?!

Well, he was hurt too. He was destroyed. One only gives what one has.

In his despair, the hissing noises returned, and the world turned red.

You are a worm through time

He just got Jesse back, he couldn't lose her because he was an asshole—

The thunder song distorts you

Jesse found him when he was lost, she pushed the Hiss away from their endless pursuit of him, she made the city—

Happiness comes

—and this was how he repaid her?!

"Dylan!"

Jesse was shaking him by the shoulders, eyes huge in surprise and fear. He blinked a couple of times, his eyes refocusing, the red fading enough for him to understand what was going on.

White pearls, but red and ye—

He shook his head and stumbled back. “Fuck, I— I’m gonna push it away—”

“Do you want help?” Jesse reached for him instinctually, but held herself back. Usually she’d just go for it, but Dylan hurt her, and it hurt him to see her hesitation. He was an idiot…

No, I can’t keep thinking, I need to calm the fuck down , he thought, taking a deep, loud breath.

He could see Polaris shimmering around Jesse, faint but present, eager to help. Part of him wanted the soothing grace she’d bring, but the other part was so averse to her that it pulled him away. Her help wouldn’t change the situation. It never did, it never saved him from the horror that was his life. She helped Jesse slip away, but never broke him free of the Bureau’s claws.

Through a mirror, inverted is made right

It was back full force, taking him. He couldn’t keep thinking, especially about Polaris, or he wouldn’t be able to resist the Hiss.

Why didn’t she bring Jesse sooner?

Leave your insides by the door

Why did she love her so much, and not him?

Push the fingers through the surface into the wet

You’ve always been the new you

You want this to be true

We stand around—

Something washed over Dylan like the strongest of waterfalls. It swept the Hiss away in its impossibly strong current, its clear tones rang through his whole being, clearing the red from his eyes in a burst of fractals of silver and blue. He felt home in a way he didn’t know he could anymore; suddenly protected and happy. Then he realized what it was, what was happening - and he pushed Jesse away from him in a fit of panic.

“W-what were you doing to my head?!” Was he talking to Jesse? To Polaris? He didn’t know for sure, but it didn't matter; he wanted answers.

“The Hiss was taking over!” Jesse stuttered, raising her hands to show she wasn't going to try anything. “I had to push it out again— ”

“By putting her back on my head?!” He took a step back and carded his fingers through his short hair, as if trying to spot any difference Polaris might have caused while she was inside.

“Was that what happened?” Jesse's eyebrows shot up in the first moment, and anger replaced it just as quickly. Polaris shimmered around her, and it looked like they started arguing with each other.

Dylan wasn't going to let them sideline him, though, and he opened his arms in frustration. “Yes! How can you not know?!”

“It’s not like I have a paranatural encyclopedia!” Jesse replied, harsher than she usually did. It was fuel for his outrage.

“So you just let her go wild and do whatever she wants, is that it?” Dylan scoffed. “What if this shit hurt me, huh?! What if it killed me?!”

Once again, shock and sadness passed through Jesse’s expression. They morphed into guilt, and she looked away from him almost like it pained her to hold Dylan’s gaze. He didn’t understand why the strong reaction at first, but then he remembered Pope’s words: they were in a coma, right? If Jesse was feeling this guilty, then…

“It… did hurt me before, didn’t it?” he asked hesitantly. Could it be?

Jesse opened her mouth to speak, but closed it again. She nodded weakly. 

Dylan felt like the floor disappeared from beneath him, and he was in the imminence of falling. “And you let her hurt me like that…?

“No!” She gasped, and panicked. “I had to— the Hiss was going to destroy everything!”

“Then you let her destroy me instead!” He couldn’t understand if he was furious, mortified or even sane anymore. How could she do it?! How?!

“I didn't know!” Jesse shouted, and tears rolled freely down her cheeks now. She stared at him like all the misery in the world was inside her, but he couldn’t register it anymore. He was deep in his particular apocalypse.

“She wants to kill me, and she's using you to do it!” He staggered back until he hit the wall, and then he scrambled to levitate away as fast as he could. “Get her away, get her out, Jesse please— I can’t stay with her here! Please!”

Jesse looked lost, scared, anxious - exactly like the eleven-years old girl that ran away as his brother was taken away by bad people. “I— I can’t!”

“Why?!” he cried out.

“She’s part of me!" Jesse clutched at her chest like she was holding herself together by sheer force of will or, paradoxically, like she wanted to tear her heart out. She was crumbling. "She’s always been!”

Dylan knew her words were true, Polaris had buried way too deep... Even now, through the chaos of pain, fear and despair, he could feel her resonance interlocked with his sister, and that was the end of the world for him - he couldn’t stand being around something that wanted his death like this. He didn’t want to lose Jesse, too. He couldn't choose.

But maybe… Maybe she was already lost.

It would tear him apart, he knew it, but at least he’d live.

Did he want to live? Him, the menace, the failure, the disappointment?

Dylan focused all his raging emotion towards a point inside. He called for a thing in his mind’s eye, something hidden in the city - a leatherbound file with an FBC logo on it.

The Report appeared in front of him, and he saw a flash of recognition in Jesse’s eyes.

He wished with all he had that both the Report and Jesse were expelled from his dream.

It was done.

If Jesse was doomed to have that thing merged with herself, he knew what awaited him: the city had no one to keep it standing anymore. It was Jesse's, and she was gone; it would crumble, and the Hiss would come for him.

The rain disappeared, along with the weather. Nothing was cold or warm anymore, everything was dry like no storm ever happened. Dylan floated back down, and braced himself against the wall. He slipped to the floor and sat down, leaned the back of his head against the hard concrete. He came to a conclusion: maybe he didn't want to live. He wanted to suffer, like he was due.

--

Chapter Text

Emily stared at the small tube TV with disbelief in her eyes. She’d been watching the footage of the Hiss Guard vaporized on the Control Point with her team, searching for any clues that could help them in their fight. It had been purely by chance that they had stopped the footage in that specific frame: the nameplate was visible over the front pocket of the guard’s shirt, and even though the image quality wasn't the best thing in the world, the guard was close enough that the name was discernible: Cho. That name wasn't unknown to Emily, even though she couldn't place it at first; she decided to cross reference it with the employee database in the Bureau server and see what turned up. She found only one match: a ranger, male, with active status. If that Hiss agent was this person, it was weird that he was wearing a guard uniform. Maybe Emily could get an answer to this and learn more about the person if she talked to someone more knowledgeable about the rangers than her - probably Arish.

She saw him as soon as she exited the board room, at his table by the stairs. He was discussing something with two rangers over a floor print, frowning in thought. Emily descended the steps and waited to the side for them to end their conversation, but as soon as Arish noticed her standing there, he turned to give her attention with his ever-friendly smile.

“Hey Pope, need something?” he asked.

“Yes, but if you're busy I can wait…”

“Don’t worry, we’re just going over some patrol routes here.” He gestured towards the floor print, which had red and blue marker lines all over. “I can spare you a moment.”

“Great!” Her face lit up, although not nearly as radiant as before the Report happened. “I promise I won’t take too much of your time. Do you know of a Ranger by the surname Cho?”

Shock crossed Arish’s face, then confusion and visible sadness. “Yes… why?”

Emily noticed his reaction, of course, and proceeded with caution. Clearly this person meant something to Arish, and he might not know about his fate. “I’ve seen the name referenced and I can’t shake the feeling I’m missing information that could help with my research. Do you know of any significant expeditions he might’ve been a part of, any particular abilities?”

He sighed deeply. “Well, I know he had just come back from a survey of the deepest parts of the Quarry when the Hiss hit. Never got an HRA.”

Emily finally remembered why she knew the name. Shit - Cho was part of Arish’s old Ranger squad, Jesse had told her. But if he was, then…

“Faden took him down for me some time ago,” Arish kept talking, visibly downcast, “the whole squad, in fact. I couldn’t let them stay Hiss—”

“Jesse ended him?!” Emily cut, her jaw dropping.

Both Arish and the Rangers looked slightly confused by her outburst. “Yes…?”

Fuck! Fuck fuck fuck—  How could she tell him his friend came back and was cleansed dead again?!

“Are you sure he’s the only one with this name? Can’t there be, say, a guard by the name of Cho?”

“No, I can’t, but have you checked the employee database?” Arish frowned, now clearly worried, “Pope, are you okay?”

No, Emily definitely wasn’t. She just found out the Hiss was potentially regenerating the people it acquired to a state fit for battle after they were downed - that was why its numbers never seemed to dwindle, even though the Slide Projector was shut off. It was an endless battle.

Her mind raced so quickly with all that information she didn’t even register running to the upper level; she only realized she was back in the cell room once she stood in front of the glass and Polaris' light caught her attention. Why did Emily come here in her sudden panic? It was not like Jesse would just wake up and deal with things—

Oh. 

That was why. Her mind brought her on autopilot to the person she trusted to take care of the situation, someone who could comfort her, whom she felt safe with. Jesse was still sleeping, though, and this realization felt like a punch to the gut; Emily had to figure it out without her.

...Ok , Emily took a shaky, purposefully deep breath, I don't know for sure the Hiss is regenerating people, and if it is, it might be a very slow process. If we happen to eradicate it before it is able to do it, we win. God, I need to run the numbers— I have to tell the others—

Polaris glinted on her eye again, catching her attention. The ever-spinning halo of light moved at a steady pace, and the prisms expanded and contracted like they followed Jesse's own breathing. It helped ground Emily, who followed that peaceful pattern.

"Are you trying to tell me something? I can't understand you anymore." She mumbled.

Emily heard the faint sound of chimes, and an image blinked in her view: it was Jesse, cleansing a floating agent per Emily's request when they first met. They didn’t have a way to know the woman would disintegrate into Hiss mist. She remembered how reserved Jesse was with her words, but her eyes betrayed the shock she felt. 

Jesse compartmentalized the hard things she had to deal with in order to keep functioning, Emily knew. It was a trauma response and a defense mechanism, and made her seem aloof and uncaring for an outside viewer, but Emily had been learning to read her. Maybe she’d feel better to know the Hiss was bringing all those people she shot down back, so she didn’t really kill them?

On second thought, she’d probably be very frustrated at having to shoot them down all over again. Well, at least the poor woman they tried to cleanse was— wait. Was she back?

Emily was back out in Central Executive as quickly as she entered the room. She leaned on the railing to get a better view of the spot she remembered the woman was floating on, all the way across from the shelter, and only saw Arish pacing in front of his table, a couple of whiteboards with pictures pinned on them and empty space. The woman wasn’t there. Once more Emily’s mind ran wild.

Is the HRA field preventing her from manifesting? If so, could the Hiss materialize her in the next best space? Should I order a search? No, I don’t think I remember her face all that well, but… Could it be the proximity to a cleansed Control Point? Considering the disintegrating effect it had on Arish’s friend, it could be systematically erasing the Hiss resonance as soon as it tried to return the woman to a physical form, or maybe the cleansing process eliminated the Hiss resonance for good, which would be a best case scenario. I need to run some calculations on that and make an interaction model, it’ll help me visualize it clearer…

The prospect of gaining insight on the matter was enough to make her take quick steps to the Board Room, now focused not on their probable demise in the face of a regenerating foe, but at possible ways to undermine its strength.

—

Jesse sat on her bed, leaning her head on the glass wall as she listened to her very old, almost breaking walkman. She didn’t express reaction when she saw Emily approaching the cell at a quick pace, which was unusual for her - Emily almost didn’t come to the cell proper, and when she did, Jesse tended to jump up and press against the glass or do something equally silly and adorable to get her attention. The fact she was quiet only added to the certainty that something was wrong, and it made Emily muse once more about how Jesse's quality of life would improve drastically if Darling only heard her pleas and approved a bigger, actually humane living space. Not that it would make Jesse feel less like a lab rat, but at least she'd have some semblance of comfort... She hoped it could be a small step to something better in the future.

It was with those thoughts in mind that Emily watched the rangers guarding the door to the cell step aside, and heard the click of the remote unlocking. She took a quick glance towards the control center, gripped her clipboard tighter and entered, suddenly anxious that she might've done something to upset Jesse before and didn't realize it. That worry vanished from her mind as soon as she took one step inside and Jesse turned to face her, softening her ever present scowl to an almost yearning expression. She took her headphones off, signaling she was open to conversation, and she looked so, so tired. The door clicked shut behind Emily once more, and everything was quiet.

"Hi Jesse," Emily smiled and waved, standing on the spot. It was standard procedure between the two of them, she would only approach if Jesse would allow it, as a sign of respecting her boundaries. "You called for me."

Jesse nodded weakly. "Sorry for that. I wanted to go to the appointment, but…" She made a motion to beckon Emily closer, and when she complied and stood before her, Jesse picked her hand lightly and made her sit by her side. "I wished you were here, you know? Just to spend some time with me…”

The shaken way she spoke made Emily's heart tighten. She'd seen Jesse in a lot of states, the most recurring ones being bored, resolute, annoyed and - to her own satisfaction - excited about being around and messing with Emily's tests (and Emily by extension). She rarely saw her this drained and sad, but she knew it must've been something big to impact her like that; Jesse was a wall when it came to her feelings.

"It's okay" Emily reached for Jesse's face slowly, watching for any sign of rejection. Jesse leaned into her touch like she'd been waiting for it - Emily even felt her shiver. "You're allowed to have a bad day, like everyone else."

"I think you're the only one who thinks that." Jesse snickered bitterly, but then her expression went back to the earlier vulnerability. "I'm so glad you came…"

"What’s gotten you so shaken?” Emily tucked a lock of Jesse’s hair behind her ear, and moved to massaging her scalp. Jesse let out a pleased sigh and took that as an invitation to place her head on Emily’s shoulder.

“I don’t want them to hear it,” Jesse whispered “I want to tell you , but not them.”

They'd been over this before. Jesse wanted to have some semblance of privacy and Emily wanted nothing more than to be able to give it to her, but she wasn't, so they had to find creative ways to interact under the radar. Besides that, Jesse was very fond of destroying all the surveillance equipment she found, and she did it so much Darling ordered it to be concealed in the cell and the test labs. That resulted in a bigger life span for the equipment, but deeper destruction in the few cases Jesse decided to commit to it.

Now, though, she didn't look like she had the energy or the desire to go wild. Emily hummed in thought, but before she could come up with any codes they could use, Jesse started talking quietly again. “Have I ever told you about my brother?”

Emily furrowed her brow in thought. "No. Everything I know is listed in the AWE file." She didn't know if that was a good or a bad sign, to be honest. She never thought much about Jesse's brother beyond the fact that what the Bureau did, tearing them apart, was beyond cruel. Now she wondered if the lack of information was indicative of the Bureau not taking an interest in him or that Darling was hiding yet another layer of this whole ‘program’ from her. Knowing him, she was inclined to believe the second option.

They stood in silence, and Jesse fidgeted with the hem of her sweatshirt as she gathered her words. Emily waited patiently.

"He… was a nice kid. Shy, obedient. He liked to do his homework, he never complained to our parents - mom kept saying I should be more like Dylan, because I was a lot, I admit." She snickered weakly. "We were always together. I protected him from the mean kids, he always tried to cheer me up after I got scolded... I remember saying I'd grow up to be brave and famous like that videogame lady, and then go see the world - but when I saw it in my mind, he was always with me. I adored him."

"That's a beautiful relationship you had." 

"Yeah, well, the Bureau fucked it all up." Jesse sighed. "I miss him so much."

Oh…   What could Emily possibly say to that? Once more she felt this deep shame of herself, the place she worked for, who she worked for. How could they do this to a person? And she didn’t have the power to do anything about it…

Jesse slipped from Emily’s shoulder to lay her head down on her lap, snuggling to her like a needy cat. She was exhausted, and Emily didn’t know what happened yet, so she ran her fingers through Jesse’s hair in hopes it would help, and Jesse turned to face her with those stunning blue eyes full of sadness. They were like ice through Emily’s heart.

“I keep wondering how he’s doing now. If he’s got a new family, if he’s well and happy… He probably thinks I—” Her voice wavered. It pained her almost physically to say the word, that much was clear, so she didn’t - She shut her eyes for a second and scoffed, instead. “But in the end it’s better, isn’t it? I wouldn’t want him to waste his life looking for me. What would he be able to do, anyway? Definitely not fight the bastards here. No, it's best like this - I don’t want him anywhere near this place.”

“Jesse…”

“And you know, sometimes, somehow, the mess that’s my head lets me dream about him.” Jesse’s tone and the way she said it made Emily sure she was implying something else there, aside from the broken lament. “He never sees me but he’s there, all grown up, handsome, and he’s not a ginger anymore. He’s usually doing something perfectly normal like having a beer, or watching a movie, or joking… And it feels so real to me. I get happy and then I— then I’m back here. Alone.”

Jesse’s eyes glistened with tears. She rubbed them and looked away, like she was ashamed of her confession. She shouldn’t be, Emily wanted to tell her. Every bastard who had a hand in locking her up there, who worked in the Prime Candidate Program, including her, were the ones who should be ashamed. Mortified, even.

Jesse was the only innocent there, and when she spoke again, it was only a whisper. “She showed me him again today. I miss him so much, I—" She tried to hold a sob, but failed. "I’m never getting out of here, am I?”

She broke down in desperation on Emily's lap, crying to the point of shaking. It was shocking for Emily, so used to her shield of indifference. What could she do to help? She needed to calm Jesse down and somehow reassure her things would get better, but she knew they wouldn’t. She couldn’t lie to Jesse like that, not after really getting to know her and earning her trust. Emily also couldn’t bear the thought of seeing Jesse waste her life away in that cell, a reality that hit her in the face with that question, so she made a decision.

“I'm getting you out of here," Emily leaned in and whispered.

"W-what?" Jesse looked back at her with puffy eyes, confused.

"I'm getting you out of here," Emily repeated slower, with all the conviction she could muster. "I don't know how, or when, but I'm going to do it. Fuck it."

"Emily…" Jesse gave her a teary smile and went back to crying, this time hiding her face on Emily's shirt.

Emily Pope had always been a woman of science. She had always dedicated all her efforts to research and honing her skills so she'd be the best version of herself she could be, and the thrill of discovery had always fueled her inner fire. Looking at that sad, crumpled woman laying on her lap, someone who suffered so much and trusted her enough to be this vulnerable, she noticed a change in her priorities. She'd do everything in her power and beyond to get Jesse out of her glass cell. She'd get her to see her brother in the future, to have a better, happier life, and if she could use science to help with all these things, then all her efforts to know, learn, research and understand would've really paid off.

—

Emily woke up startled, with a weird ringing in her ears. She hadn't noticed she had fallen asleep, and it took her a moment to realize she was still in the Board Room, hearing one of Dr. Higa's proposals regarding increasing the power of the HRAs through an amplified electric input. If the other researchers noticed her nap, no one said a word, and no one looked now that she was awake. It was a small mercy they didn't get to see how shaken she was, or her teary eyes; She didn't think she'd be able to explain that in the present moment, not when she still felt the ghost sensation of being in that cell with a desperate Jesse clinging to her.

Emily didn't dream since she came back from the Report. This one had the same subject and felt like the first dreams did, before they tried to use the AI to get to Dylan: like she was herself alright, but she was following a scene rather than acting in the dreamspace. If this was indeed an effect - or late consequence - of the Report, why now? She wasn't close to it, she wasn't even trying to sleep…

Polaris appeared in her vision all of a sudden, pulsing with urgency. It made Emily jump on her seat, wide awake.

Polaris? What— what's the matter?

She didn't give her any sort of explanation, fading from view as quickly as she appeared. That got Emily restless; clearly something was happening, but she didn't know what. Was Polaris trying to warn her about something? Were they in danger?

The pulsing returned, as urgent as before, and Emily's senses were taken by the notion of falling and deep, deep sadness. It made her hair stand on end, and she was certain who this was about.

" Jesse. "

Emily got up and ran out of the Board Room, knocking down her chair in the process. She was back in the cell room in a second, and as soon as she opened the double doors she could see the doctor responsible for taking care of the Fadens running back and forth, fiddling with the life support systems. That didn’t look good at all.

“What’s going on?!” She approached, startling the doctor.

“Ah, Dr. Pope!” He almost dropped the vial he was holding. “There have been wild fluctuations in the Director’s vitals—”

Oh no.

“ —very similar to the ones that happened when you— “

A burst of energy originating from Jesse hit the walls of the cell, causing a hollow sound. Polaris’s fractals pulsed in Emily's view again, and she knew something was about to happen. Emily exchanged a quick glance with the doctor and ran inside the cell. The air was charged, life support was beeping in alarm, and all Emily could do was lean on Jesse's bed instinctively, grab her hand and stare at her restless expression. She looked like she was in the middle of a terrible nightmare: twitching, trembling, gritting her teeth. 

"Jesse…" Emily called, squeezing her hand even though she knew she couldn't hear her or feel her touch. It didn't matter; she had to be there. Polaris called her for a reason.

—

Jesse tried to fight it, to sink her fingers into the threads of a thousand realities and resist the force pulling her away from the only home she found all these years. The force and the home were one: the very same brother who was now exiling her from his dream.

She wasn’t strong enough. The effort was like falling through an endless hole and colliding with the sides, trying to claw at the smooth walls without ever finding purchase. She saw herself passing rapidly through the realities she'd been to on the way to finding Dylan, watching them flash by: the one where Dylan was Director, and she was the janitor's assistant; the one where she was still locked in the ward, in solitary confinement and proclaimed insane; the one where she got to the Bureau too late, and Hiss Dylan was the one to come and greet her, floating over the corpses of all the people she couldn't save; the one where the cleansing killed Dylan, and she killed a lot of people because of how they treated his death, then she ran away; the one where the Bureau killed Dylan years before, and she left them all to rot; the one where she turned Hiss, and saw flashes of herself killing the survivors of the initial invasion, one by one.

So much death followed her. So much struggle. It was hell to pass through those scenarios before and yet she did, riding on her determination to find her brother. Was it worth it, now that he shunned her, how much she tore herself apart in her pursuit?

Jesse knew that yes, it was. She'd do it all over again on the chance Dylan was finally safe, even if it hurt this much. There wasn't a time where she remembered not being hurt, actually, it was more familiar to her than the care and comfort she craved. So she could deal with it.

Still, the fact he feared her, and actively wanted her away now… This threatened to sink like razors into her wounds and finish tearing her apart.

What was she supposed to do now?

Jesse opened her eyes, and the first thing she saw was a worried Emily Pope staring at her, holding on to her hand like it could anchor them both somehow. Polaris spun around her head like a halo, and something about the way the heavy light enveloped her made her holy - a guardian angel, hoping she could do her job.

The sight of her hurt Jesse; Emily looked so worried, and not at all pissed at her, something she should be. Jesse didn't deserve her care or her love, she was a sad excuse of a person who only brought death and destruction in her wake. It was like that in Ordinary, at the FBC… She put her brother in a coma, and now he rightfully hated her, no matter if it was the right thing.

Sometimes, especially when she was younger, Jesse wondered how things would've been if she wasn't born. The same thing was going through her mind now: Dylan probably wouldn't have played in the dump, afraid as he was of disobeying orders, and he'd never have found the Slide Projector. He'd never have been kidnapped and imprisoned, living through hell until he was ultimately taken by an alien entity and twisted so much he had his head fried upon cleansing. 

Jesse was a blight on everything she touched. She should never have been born, so she wouldn't ruin everything for everyone, including herself. 

What could she do now?

--

Chapter Text

The passage of time wasn't all that important anymore, but if Jesse was forced to guess, she'd shrug weakly and say it had been "long". She woke up, she ate when it was expected of her, she was examined almost every day, she showered, she slept. All of that happened every day, and she couldn't care less about the details. She didn't have energy or desire to do anything by herself, and even this routine was only owed to the fact it was easier to follow than to stand the consequences of not doing so. She didn't care for the Bureau, or for the fight she was supposed to still be having, endlessly, with the Hiss infesting those corridors. It didn't matter anymore. It was all for nothing.

Jesse did feel bad for Arish, who came to visit her everyday. He seemed to want to help her recover, unaware everything had already gone to shit. The guy was a great friend, and deserved something better than a broken, unhinged wrecking ball like her, especially after losing so many of his old friends in one go.

Then there was Emily, and a whirlwind of emotions clashed inside Jesse everytime she was around: guilt, sadness, anxiety, and a deep desire to be held in her arms and comforted, something she was frankly terrified of, because she didn't deserve it at all.

Jesse wanted to cry every time Emily walked through the door with her hopeful eyes and her worried frown. She always came to spend time with her at lunch break and then for a couple of hours after leaving work for the day, until she started dozing off from exhaustion in the middle of her sentences and left to sleep.

In those sleepy moments, Jesse watched her peaceful expression and remembered their kisses under the memory of Hedron, the dinner, the moments of cuddling and watching the stars together. Those were probably her happiest moments, right there with when she first found Dylan in his slumber. It hurt her to know how badly she messed things up when all she wanted was to the people she loved by her side: to get to know her brother again, to show him the world he missed, to care for and protect him, to show him love - and she wanted to get to be with Emily, to understand that bewildering, deep, fuzzy feeling she got around her. It was a simple desire, nothing about it was wrong or immoral, but still she was forced to choose, and of course she chose Dylan. It would never be different. She was a fool for thinking that maybe things were going to be fair and great, now that she took her place as Director. They wouldn’t. Life showed her once again she wasn't supposed to have anything or anyone for herself. How could she, when everything she touched, she left broken?

She couldn’t sleep that night, all of the self-hating and fearful thoughts circling around in her mind at full speed. She didn’t fight or redirect them; the absolute emotional exhaustion ensured they passed by unchallenged as she dissociated, staring at the ceiling until someone called her in the morning. She lay on a stretcher by the cell, with Emily on another one by her side, because the doctors wanted to keep an eye on them both - especially her - or something like that. Jesse had a clear sight of her brother lying comatose if she simply tilted her head, and while she was usually too numb to care, that night the thoughts were piercing her in such a way it was leaving her restless. She got up and walked aimlessly, thinking that she might go somewhere else, a place where no one would find her when the morning came. The House was full of such places, if she wanted to look. Her steps were silent, her mind was nothing but static, and she tucked every emotion under the thick haze of numbness for the night, in hopes she wouldn’t break down until she was safe and alone. Jesse was a loaded gun and she knew it - might as well unload somewhere no one would get hurt, if it came to it. 

Something caught her attention when she passed Emily’s desk in the corner of the room. She knew most of her notes on Dylan’s condition were there, as research was better conducted on site, but she spotted something else in one of the whiteboards: her name. While this wasn’t uncommon at all - she was Dylan’s sister, the Director, a paranatural powerhouse, and the list went on - it made her curious, and she actually looked at the rest of the writings: 

Jesse took a breath. So Emily was trying to help, even after Dylan kicked her out and Jesse told her not to make them a priority? It seemed like Jesse would never stop being surprised by her kindness.

Guiding stars…  

Jesse approached the desk, feeling bittersweet at how Emily chose to call them in her note. She wasn’t a guiding star - she was a trainwreck, a nuclear bomb, a whole AWE on her own, and Emily would do well to learn that and stay away before she got hurt. She probably did, already. Still, she chose to be so gentle...

There were piles of papers and binders neatly arranged on the desk, as usual for Emily’s workspace. Jesse grabbed a random sheet of paper with a graph and lots of complicated information on it. She put it aside, grabbed another one - this one dealt with stages of sleep and processes of dreaming, apparently, and was also full of info Jesse couldn’t grasp. She picked a third page from a different pile, a typewritten one. It seemed to be a memo:

It has come to my attention that misleading rumors are being spread about the incursion into AI -0127UE, coupled with a growing concern about the Director and Research’s next steps, so much that a missive clarifying these matters has become necessary. 

Director Faden could not be reached properly within the Report, thus making it impossible to bring her back from the altered comatose state, as detailed in the attached copy of file 26591-AI-0127UE. Verbal communication was possible, however, and she left us a sole directive: We are to focus our efforts into finding a solution to the Hiss problem in her absence, rather than into trying to bring her back.

It is a controversial order, as many believe her to be the only one capable of leading us to the end of the lockdown, but allow me to remind you it’s been our efforts, along with the other sectors, that have made it possible to establish a safe perimeter, rescued most of the survivors and day after day discovered new information that can help us in our fight. Our work is not trivial, and we are capable of making a difference in this lockdown situation, be it until our Director comes back or we eradicate the Hiss for good. 

We have what it takes. We will follow her order.

That is not to say we will abandon every attempt at helping her in her endeavor of rescuing her brother and coming back safely. Even though she doesn’t want us to divert resources to this, there is still a way to make it work: I will personally use my hours after work to research ways to support her. This is not a veiled demand for help; You are not required to participate in this. I do encourage you to come find me in the cell room if you have something to add, though, or if you believe the rumors, so you can form your own conclusions about the seriousness of the work being conducted here.

Yours in science,

Emily Pope

Head of Research

Jesse had two major thoughts about the missive. The first was angry bewilderment - who the hell would be dumb enough to think Emily was trying to upstage her?! It was completely insane, and of course it had to be office gossip. It was baffling how cruel people could be, even in this lockdown situation. The second was about how serious Emily had been about her request to shift the focus to the Hiss, and about how even then, she still wouldn't give up on her. Jesse never had someone treat her like she was worth insisting on, it was a weird feeling. Weird, moving and shameful…

Emily deserved better than to be left alone to deal with the Hiss crisis and people's pettiness. She deserved someone who would treasure her and take the load off her back, someone who would be stable enough to support her, someone who would stay. God, how Jesse wanted to be all that, but she knew she wasn't; she couldn't even find herself anymore. 

She pulled the chair out, sat down and felt herself sink against the padded back rest. She took one last look at the missive and put it aside. 

I need to talk to her. I have to say I'm sorry.

Would Emily finally be angry with her? Jesse could almost see her understanding expression, and it was a softness that hurt her, because that couldn’t be how Emily was truly feeling inside. There was no way she wasn’t hurt, but Jesse knew she’d bury that away in favor of being helpful, and she didn’t want that. She’d find ways to make it up to her.

Even if we don’t stay… If she doesn’t want… I can still help, right? I’m a gun. I’m firepower. If I can go back and fight the Hiss…

Polaris appeared in her eyes, signaling concern and disagreement: not a gun, but something else— 

An aegis.

Something Jesse had absolutely no clue about what it was, and Polaris offered no clarifications for.

Before Jesse could ask, though, something else intruded on her thoughts: a ringing, like the one of an old phone, echoing. The Hotline.

She rolled her eyes and scoffed. The last thing she wanted was to hear the Board’s passive-aggressive ramblings, or to discover there was another crisis going on she was the only one capable of dealing with, but she wanted to help, didn’t she? She was the Director. She could start by doing her job…

“Director Faden, ma’am?” one of the rangers asked as she emerged from the room. He sounded sleepy, and rather surprised.

“Hotline,” she mumbled and walked on, not giving him a second glance.

Time was strange in the Oldest House. Even though Jesse no longer cared for its passage, the walk to the Hotline Chamber seemed to pass in the blink of an eye. Blink, and she had her gaze fixed on the red bakelite telephone, and her hands trembled as they leaned on the small table.

Deep breaths, Jesse.

She picked up the receiver, and slowly took it to her ear.

<Welcome back Director/Servant>

<we missed/wanted to slap you>

<It is/was time to get back on the fight/annihilation>

<there is no time for distractions/romance/impending doom>

<The Hiss/Adversary is around>

<Wield the gun/sword/you>

<Execute>

Blink . Jesse sat in the Director’s Office. She placed the receiver back, and sighed. Blood dripped on the dark wooden desktop from her nose. The mental pressure of contacting the Board from this plane was high, and maybe she would never get really used to it. 

She clenched her fist. No time for distractions. Was this what the Board thought this was about? That her brother was a distraction? She expected them to be condescending and tone-deaf as always, but implying this about Dylan had the same effect as the time they ordered her to get Emily out of the Foundation: it made her more determined to get all the info she could on them and ensure their downfall, because how dare they . 

The anger snapped something into place for her. It was more familiar than apathy, and it was a force that moved her. She wanted to help, right? The House just had to tell her where, and she would go hunt some Hiss that night.

The House seemingly heard her, and the bureau alert beeped in her head.

—

Jesse phased into Central Executive amidst a tornado of red sand, astral plane rock and resonance that scattered everywhere. The place was packed with researchers and agents at the time, something Jesse didn’t expect - how long had she been away? - and they all whipped to watch her sudden arrival, reacting in different degrees of surprise as they saw her gruesome state: blood plastered the side of her face and clothes, soot covered her from head to toe, her sweatshirt was singed all over... She never really liked the P7 pajamas so it wouldn’t be a terrible loss if they were destroyed —  except her other clothes weren’t as comfortable to sleep in. She knew the employees’ concern wasn’t so much about her comfort as it was about her passing out from blood loss in front of them, though. Wild, how priorities varied from person to person.

“Director, what happened to you?!” A small hispanic man Jesse knew was a researcher came running to her. “Someone go call Wells!”

“I’m fine,” Jesse mumbled. 

“You look like hell! Respectfully, let me take you to—”

“ Jesse?!”

Deadly fights with the puppets of an alien resonance didn’t faze Jesse as much as seeing Emily running towards her, color draining from her face as she took in how terrible Jesse looked. Jesse opened her mouth to try and calm her, but before she could do anything, Emily and the other researcher were already dragging her towards the shelter Wells used as an infirmary. 

“Jesus, Faden, did you go through a meat grinder?!” Wells made her sit down on the stretcher and started grabbing his tools frantically.

“No, I—”

“We’ve been looking for you for hours! Where were you, what— ” Emily cut her off, carding her fingers through her hair in a nervous tick. “Just hang in there, please. Wells will patch you up.”

Wells started cleaning the blood out of Jesse’s face. She frowned, but kept still. “I’m fine, Emily…”

“You’re— hah.” Emily let out an almost offended scoff. ”You do realize you’re covered in blood, right?”

Jesse shrugged. “I’m not hurt.”

“How can you not be— Jesse .” Emily gave her an annoyed, piercing look. “Don’t lie to me to make me feel better.”

“Actually, she’s not lying, Dr. Pope,” Wells chimed in, “take a look here.”

Emily approached, almost touching Jesse’s legs on the stretcher. She grabbed her chin and gently tilted her face to the side, so she could see what Wells was pointing at: there was a thin scar going from the top edge of Jesse’s face to where her jaw met her neck. Now with her face somewhat clean, they could see it was deep, shiny and an ugly shade of pink, like it was still in the first stages of healing. Emily held her breath instinctively - that definitely wasn’t there the last time she saw Jesse.

“What hit you this time?” Wells asked Jesse, a knowing and tired tone to his voice.

“ This time?” Emily blinked.

“A metal shard of… something. I didn’t get a good look.” Jesse’s hand went to massage her shoulder instinctively, she looked away from them.

Wells clicked his tongue. “You should be more careful, Faden.”

“Yeah…”

“ Can you please explain what is going on right now?!” Emily practically roared to get their attention, and Jesse was sure she never saw her this frantic. She looked about to lose it.

“The House heals me,” Jesse said slowly, afraid to set her off. “I don’t know how, but if I get to a Control Point and focus, it does it.”

“ How many times,” Emily grunted under her breath, eyes locked with Jesse’s.

“Well, all of them—”

“ How many times you were hurt and walked off as if nothing happened.”

“Oh.” Jesse hesitated. The truth was that she didn’t know anymore, with how often it happened. Was Emily talking about serious injuries or all of them…?

Emily turned to Wells, her sharp eyes saying enough. He raised his hands in surrender. “Many times, doctor. Many times.”

She turned her gaze back to Jesse and it was clear she wanted an explanation, or maybe a reason, and Jesse’s thoughts were a mess of anxiety with the very clear prospect of disappointing Emily again. It was finally happening: she was about to hate her. “I didn’t want to worry you…”

“Worry me? I’d be worried regardless, Jesse. If you had just told me—”

“But that’s not a problem, really! I’m used to it. I’ve been in a lot of fights, I know pain, and now being able to heal—”

“That makes it worse!” Emily threw her hands in the air. “You shouldn’t have to get used to getting hurt, for god’s sake!”

Jesse tilted her head, a little confused. “But I am…”

“Jesse.” Emily put her hands on Jesse’s thighs, got them closer. When she spoke again, her voice was a soft plea. “I know you’re super powerful and you think you have to do things on your own, but you’re not alone. We — I — want to help. Let me.”

“But you can’t fight for me—”

“I know, I’m painfully aware, ” Emily sighed, annoyed for a second, “but I can come up with gear to protect you - there have been great advancements in the ballistic suits field, or if the House won’t allow it, hell, I’ll research a way to weave black rock in your clothes if it means you’ll be safe. You just have to let me.”

“Em…” Jesse averted her gaze. What could she say? She was expecting Emily to point out how reckless she’d been, how she was putting everyone at risk because of it, that her job was to get them out and she was being selfish with her stupid grief... but instead Emily was pleading to help her, so vulnerable, all the earlier rage turning to worry. How could she deal with such softness and care? She didn’t know what to do. 

Wells noticed how charged the air was between the two women and excused himself quietly, stating that he had to take a look at the other two people currently in the shelter. He dragged the curtain shut as he passed, giving them more privacy. 

“I know you’re not well, and you probably don’t want to talk about it, but—” Emily picked one of Jesse’s hands, playing with her fingers “— I’m here for you. I messed up badly, and I’m so sorry, Jesse, so sorry… I thought I was doing the right thing, but I will be smarter in my judgement in the future, that’s a promise, and I still want to help. If you let me.”

What?

“You didn’t mess anything up, Emily. You were right.” Jesse shook her head, shame and sadness seeping from her words. “I didn’t know what to do, though, and I was a coward. You should hate me for letting Dylan throw you out like that - and right after we got together… I’m terrible. I— I shouldn’t have let him…”

There were a lot of things Jesse shouldn’t have done or permitted, and they all came to eat at her, but then Emily chuckled, good naturedly, and it threw her mind into confusion: what was funny? What did she do?

“I don’t believe you could’ve done much, Jesse. Dylan was panicking and your priority was calming him and reassuring him he was safe. I understand that. In fact, I believe my judgement was flawed because I never prepared for the scenario where you two might be settled and well, and that you could want to stay in the dream. I very much assumed you’d grab Dylan and we’d go, but a scientist can never just assume things - it leads to error.” She sounded so sorry to admit that, not because of pride, but because of the consequences. Emily was far too practical to let her ego intervene. “One thing I would never question, though, was that he’s your biggest priority, and you’ll do anything to see him safe. In that light, I could never hate you for doing what was already known and expected of you.”

Emily was basically saying she knew Jesse would put Dylan before her and she didn’t hold any grudge for it. That was insane . People just weren’t this generous, with reason - this was the sort of thing that wore down all sorts of relationships, it required insane amounts of devotion and mental fortitude, Jesse knew it; all of the relationships she might’ve developed over the years were overshadowed and crumbled when paired against her pursuit of her brother. She didn’t want that to happen here.

“But I let you come back and deal with all this—” Jesse motioned around them “— by yourself, while I hid away and pretended everything was fine!”

“No you didn’t.” Emly gave her a small clever smile. “I offered it. I assessed the situation as well as my mistakes, and realized the best course of action was to cease the hostility by coming back to our plane. I asked for your orders and you gave them to me. I did nothing more than my job these weeks, and I did it well, if I may say. Besides, I wasn’t alone: we got this small surviving part of the Bureau up and running together, and all these people helped our survival in one way or another.”

The missive Jesse read earlier came to mind, with its clinical yet passionate words about how the Bureau staff also had a part to play in resisting the Hiss for this long. Jesse fought them alone for so long, solved the messes and potential cataclysms alone so often, that she couldn’t really picture how it went to the rest of the people. They weren’t sitting on her asses - it was just that she was too much of a lone wolf, not used to relying on people. Except Polaris, of course. And Emily...

“I will say that it hurt, though, being back here without you,” Emily continued, “even though I can understand why you remained there. My emotions were still very…  annoying and counterproductive, let’s say. Right now they make me selfishly happy that you’re back. I… missed you greatly.”

Static ran through Jesse’s spine as she heard that, she felt warm and eager despite everything. She finally held Emily’s hand back, and squeezed. “I missed you too.”

They looked at each other, so close. One pull, and they could share a kiss again, hold each other, remedy some of the sadness. Jesse knew she didn’t deserve how good Emily was, but she wanted her; she wanted her embrace, her taste, her comfort… 

She saw Emily shiver, probably guessing what she was thinking about. She leaned in - Emily pulled away, still holding her hand. Jesse wanted to chase after her, but she couldn’t bring herself to. 

“What do you want me to do now, Jess?” Emily whispered, a little shaken at first but regaining composure. “Relating to Dylan. Does he need to be rescued?”

There it was again, the storm. Emily missed her, but didn’t want her - not like that, not now. Sunshine never lasts.

“I don’t know. I don’t think he’d want to.” Jesse rubbed her eye with her free hand. She had to remind herself it wasn't a rejection, not really, Emily was still there. She was just hurt, understandably. It was best to focus on what she was asking for now. “He probably despises me, because I’m with Polaris. That’s why he kicked me out.”

“So that’s why you’re back? I’m so sorry…” 

Just like that, the contact was back: Emily sat down by Jesse and pulled her in for a hug, massaging her scalp. Jesse almost sobbed with the touch; They might not have kissed, but she didn’t realize how much she craved even tamer affection until now. Emily wasn’t rejecting her, nothing wouldn’t change from before. She started crying. 

“I just wanted to have both of you…” she whispered. 

“You will, Jess. One day you will.”

She didn’t want to wait for it, she did it for seventeen years already. The last of her patience crumbled when she was offered the option to enter an AI and get her brother back, and now she couldn’t deal with the broken pieces of her that were left. His terrified expression when he learned Polaris was part of her would be seared into her mind forever... She couldn’t change what she was, and she wouldn’t want to, but for him…

Polaris appeared in her mind like a warm blanket over her shaking form. She showed her the memory of a chemistry class so old, Jesse had forgotten the teacher’s face entirely. The woman pointed at the drawing of a molecule on the blackboard. That’s water: one oxygen, two hydrogen. You couldn’t get it by pairing three oxygen, nor three hydrogen; only by putting these different elements together. Everything serves a purpose in nature. How beautiful is that?

Jesse sobbed. I want my brother, she thought. I want Emily. I want things to be fucking normal for once.

Polaris understood.  

Around one constant they revolve.

—

Chapter Text

"Hey Thomas."

"Mm?" 

"What are you doing when we get out of here?"

There were two improvised dorm rooms in Central Executive. They were set up in the largest office spaces, and consisted of the office furniture pushed to the walls, all the mattresses and blankets the rangers and Jesse could bring from the shelters, and whatever the people were using to signal which spot was theirs: a lot of people wrote their names on sheets of paper and left them on their pillows when they left for the day, but some used more creative alternatives, like filling their pillow with post-its, putting a lot of binders on the mattress, or even pouring coffee on the sheets (which surely wasn't intentional).

Jesse was laying on the mattress furthest into the room, with the blanket up to her ears so people wouldn't notice it was her. Earlier she asked not to sleep by the glass cell anymore, and decided to take one of the only free spots in the dorm, a bed which had been used by a ranger who died a week before. She would've slept okay on the couch in the Director's office, but Emily and the doctors thought it was better for her to stay closer for a day or two while she still recovered from the dissociation that plagued her for all those days.

Since all the clocks were frozen at 3:45pm and there were no windows in the bureau, people were assigned one of three shifts spanning the day, and there were always people working. The dorm was almost empty now, except for a guy snoring on one of the middle beds, a woman fast asleep on the bed next to his, and three people sitting in the other corner of the room, talking. They weren’t very loud, but Jesse had very good ears, which was both a blessing and a curse. She didn't mean to intrude on them — she was tired both physically and mentally from the day and wanted to sleep anyways —  but she knew that now that her ears had picked up the topic she wouldn't be able to ignore it any longer.

Unaware of the Director listening, Thomas kept talking. "I don't know. I'm probably sleeping a whole day, then having pizza - you know those from the place near the station, with extra pepperoni? God, I miss them… What about you?"

"I'm going to kiss and hold my wife so much, I've been dreaming of it." The other man had a dreamy tone to his voice. "She must be so worried…"

"I hope someone got Scribbles out of the apartment," the third person, a woman, added anxiously. "Sorry, I… He's my dog. He was all alone…"

"Oh shit!" the guy named Thomas replied. "Do you have a neighbor who would've noticed, or…?"

They kept going with their conversation, talking about the things they missed, the people they left, if they would've been listed as missing people by now. They sounded so hopeful, sad and tired at the same time, worn out by day after day of being locked inside a temperamental building with an unknown alien threat who wanted to take them for itself. Jesse knew all the people she was able to save had a life outside the Oldest House, and so did the ones she wasn’t able to save, but even though she could sympathize with their plight, she didn't know what it was like. She arrived at the Bureau with the clothes she was wearing, her ID and ten bucks. Her only possessions, a backpack containing a couple of changes of cloth, some hygiene products and a bootleg iPod, had to have  been thrown away after the month she paid for in the storage unit expired. She had no house, and the only family she had was currently in a coma in a room nearby; She had nothing to go back to. 

Hearing those people talk about it brought the subject closer to home. She could feel their grief, their fears, how much they missed the world they left behind. It made her think. What would she do when this was finally over? She'd probably see people out, take a couple steps outside, breathe the New York air, and go back in to sleep on the couch in the Director's office. She could even ask Ahti if he'd let her spend a night with him at his vacation cabin, she was sure he'd listen somehow.

Langston would finally reunite with his beloved Alfred, and it would be a scene worthy of story books (she was sure he'd try to make poems out of it, but the result would be as good as the samples she heard at the Investigations sector - terrible but so entertaining). That put a small smile on Jesse's face; hopefully Langston's neighbor would be okay with him after he explained his absence. She had to brainstorm a convincing tale to tell everyone with Emily when they got back to the outside world. Even if it would be a highly classified government matter, there had to be some sort of info to at least placate the need for explanations. She was living proof that you couldn’t just redact everything and expect people to be satisfied with that.

Arish would finally be able to get the beers he was craving so much, and to sleep on a real bed. The guy was juggling two Head of Sector roles and doing it well, bless his soul; Jesse had to put someone on the Operations role as soon as the circumstances let her. And on the Investigations and Communications roles as well…

What a mess. She shook her head — at least she had Arish, who would probably choose to keep being Head of Security, and she also had her brilliant Head of Research.

Emily…  the butterflies in Jesse's stomach woke at the thought of her. She realized she didn't know what Emily's plans for the end of the lockdown were, they never really talked about it. They didn't talk much about her life outside, actually - Emily was very private about it, she probably thought it was irrelevant for work. It was a fair point, sure, but it held relevance to Jesse: did she have anyone waiting for her outside, missing her terribly? Jesse remembered her mentioning her father, once. She hoped he was as level-headed as his daughter, so he'd be well equipped to handle her sudden absence.

What was Emily's favorite food, her favorite song? Did she like movies or tv series best? What were the places she liked to go? Jesse would ensure she would be able to experience those things again. She wanted to experience them with her, if she'd let her; she wanted to know her world, too.

Jesse's heart raced at the realization. A pleasant buzz rose up her spine as she pictured herself holding Emily's hand while they walked through the streets of New York, free of obligations and worries, enjoying the day. Emily would have to be the one to introduce her to places, and she couldn't wait for it: restaurants, museums, parks, book stores, libraries... It didn't matter where they'd go, because she'd be happy to be with her.

Was this what love felt like?

Those were the sorts of things she'd get excited to think about doing with her brother too, except she'd be the one dragging him around. The eagerness to see him happy, to provide him a good time, to be near him, to share moments with him, it was all similar to what she was feeling now thinking of Emily, the difference being that she wanted to kiss and cuddle her in a way she obviously didn't with Dylan. She felt dumb, because it had been staring her in the face for some time now, and she took this long to realize what was going on: Jesse was a fool in love, and she already hurt Emily on the first day. Clearly, she was doing a terrible job.

If they stand on opposite sides… what do I do? Jesse thought, aiming for Polaris. That time I was starting to panic, I wanted to calm Dylan and it didn’t let me see things clearly. I gotta find a solution if it happens again. 

Polaris sparkled gently, bringing a sense of support and understanding, as so many times before. She showed Jesse an episode of a show about the universe, depicting a black hole, and the host spoke of how it was formed by stars so dense their cores collapsed in themselves, and how their gravitational pull was so strong not even light could escape it. Jesse didn't understand what she meant by that; sure, Polaris often used astronomy metaphors because it was a subject Jesse liked and had some knowledge of, but that didn't mean the messages were always clearly translated to the human understanding. In fact, they rarely were - even when Polaris told her to come to the Oldest House, the clearest part of the message was the date, time and location, not the purpose or what she would find. 

What does this have to do with anything? Jesse frowned.

Polaris's spinning slowed for a second, as if she was trying to come up with a better answer. This time, she showed Jesse herself sitting by a campfire, comfortable despite the cold night, and then right after she showed herself in the middle of a forest fire. 

Okay… This one is about the dangers of leaving campfires unattended, isn't it? 

Polaris' chimed in with a bell-like chuckle, and that made Jesse smile. She sent her an intent for choosing between the two scenarios.

The campfire, obviously. I'm not a fan of getting roasted.

She pulsed outwards, and another scene flashed in Jesse's mind, and she instantly knew this one was a memory: it featured one of her many therapists over the years, one of the few she had a somewhat good relationship with. She had been what, thirteen or fourteen at the time? She remembered it was her worst phase at school. 

The therapist, a man with thick glasses, had the telltale clinical calm in his demeanor, but his eyes were warm and affable as he talked. He had just given Jesse a small chocolate bar that she accepted despite her anger, because she wasn't crazy enough to decline candy yet. I understand it's too much, Jesse. No one should have to deal with this much at your age, but we can't change the past. What we can do is make sure your emotions have safe outlets, so they won't be locked burning you up from the inside or making you lash out at other people. 

Jesse had fought with a guy at school at the time, because he had made fun of her dead brother and how the industrial accident that had supposedly wiped Ordinary out of the map had left her freaky and defective. She'd come to learn the next day that she had not only broken his nose, but a couple of teeth and a finger as well. She had been so proud of it at the time, despite the therapist telling her she shouldn't lash out like that. She’d known already she would likely have to fight the whole world to get Dylan back, and she'd do it; she wouldn't ever back down or apologize for it.

Why was Polaris showing her that memory now? Jesse was filled with a weird nostalgia upon seeing it, because while she didn't miss those times at all, remembering how driven she was even at that age was bittersweet, especially now that she did find Dylan. It wasn't all for nothing; she did find better outlets, she channeled her fury and it compelled her forward until this day: a day where she saved a lot of people from immediate doom to possibly eventual doom, laid on a mattress on the floor of an improvised dorm and Dylan had rejected her because of something she couldn't control.

Her breath got caught in her throat. A cold dread settled down. It couldn’t all be for nothing.

She wanted someone to hold her, and her heart told her exactly who it was. She couldn’t have it… Polaris apologized in her mind, her fractals glinting sadly for Jesse. She wanted to help, but she couldn’t.

It's okay… I guess we're both tired. Maybe we'll find a better way tomorrow. 

Sleeping was definitely something Polaris could help with. Her spinning turned gentle, the glow, diffuse, and the faint sound of chimes helped lull Jesse to sleep, along with her own exhaustion. 

—

A gentle breeze blew, weirdly salty like the ones at coastal cities. Jesse opened her eyes to a blue sky and white cotton-candy clouds, and the surprise made her try to sit up, sink and flail on water, because - and it was a shocking realization - she'd been floating in the sea, no land in view, only the…

...painting of the sky?

Jesse blinked, shook her head and looked around. She was sitting in a bathtub, completely dressed and soaked, a little dizzy as well. For some unknown reason there was a painting of the sky right across from her on the bathroom wall, because sure, why the hell not? That seemed to be a theme in the Oldest House and the Oceanview, so it made sense it would happen wherever she was now. Where was it, by the way? Was it a new threshold inside the House? Maybe her bed got shifted to this… bathroom? Bathroom. At least it looked like one.

She squeezed her hair to get rid of some of the water in it and got up, holding on to the curtain and the wall, so she wouldn’t fall while she got out of the bathtub. Unfortunately she slipped anyway and went straight to the floor, bringing the shower curtain with her.

"Ow fuck." She groaned and tentatively touched her bad shoulder. It had taken the brunt of the impact and it hurt a lot - she'd better not have messed it up more than it already was…

"What is going on here, helvetti ?!"

An old man with silver hair sticking wildly to all sides, a loose old t-shirt and old shorts appeared at the door. He looked angry at first, but as soon as he laid eyes on Jesse's crumpled form his eyebrows shot up high in surprise.

"You!" He blinked a couple of times. "This is different. I wasn't expecting visitors." 

"Ahti…?" Jesse wasn't sure if she hit her head or if she really was seeing the janitor in front of her. He was supposed to be on vacation, how could he be there? When he gave her his tape player, he was the one who appeared back at the House, not the other way around.

"Yes, it's me. Are you going to lay there like rotten fruit?" He offered her a hand, and she finally remembered to sit up and accept his help.

"Thanks. Where are we?"

"My vacation spot. You're going to freeze in those clothes. Wait here."

It took an awkwardly long time of Jesse looking at each possible corner of the bathroom for Ahti to come back, and he came bringing her a fluffy robe and an old, perpetually stained shirt that could easily reach the middle of Jesse's thighs with how big it was. He gave her a moment to change, and when she was finished he signaled for her to follow. They exited the bathroom into a wooden corridor that ended in a living room to the right and a kitchen to the left. It was all very rustic and old, but charming in a way - except for the couch. It was just hideous with its checkered mustard and navy pattern.

"You need to put heat into these bones, or you're going to get sick," Ahti said as he looked for something in one of the cabinets in the corner of the living room.

"Don't worry, I've had worse…"

"Ha! Doesn't mean you have to feel it again!" He turned with a big bottle of whiskey in one hand and two glasses in the other. He put them down on top of the cabinet and filled both the glasses, giving Jesse one.

She looked at it with curiosity. She'd usually eat something before having strong alcohol like that, but fuck it - as she said, she'd had it worse before.

" Kippis, " Ahti raised his glass, and she mimicked him.

They drank it in one go. It burned in Jesse's throat and filled her with warmth, but it wasn't whiskey like she thought; it was good, a bit sweet, and she didn't know what it was.

"It's Moonshine." Ahti smiled proudly, tapping the side of the bottle,  "secret recipe, best you'll find in this gods-forsaken land."

"It's very," Jesse cleared her throat, "strong."

"Yeah, yeah, people from this country are just weak." He waved her off. "Now, you interrupted my afternoon nap, perkele ."

"Sorry, I, uh, didn't know. I don't even know how I got here, to be honest." She massaged her bad shoulder. It was still hurting from the fall.

"Let me worry about that. You worry about telling me what you came to tell me.”

What?

"You’re with the helmet askew, girl, have another glass and tell me about it."

"What? No Ahti, I don't—" but he was already pushing a glass full of moonshine In her hand. He stared at her until she took a big swig.

"So…?" He made a motion for her to go on.

Jesse crisped her lips, looking at the liquid in the glass. She sighed. "Well… it all started when we found this AI in the Director's office…"

She proceeded to tell Ahti about the whole situation caused by the Report AI and how she was now between a rock and a hard place. She didn’t notice how the alcohol eased her into retelling events and let her admit certain things, certain feelings she wouldn't have shared otherwise. At some point she sat down on the ugly couch - she made sure to inform Ahti of how ugly it was, and it seemed to amuse him - and sank into it, feeling herself heavy with emotional turmoil and drunkenness, nursing her fourth or fifth glass. Ahti grunted and nodded on occasion, encouraging her to keep going.

“So you see, that’s the irony of it,” Jesse rubbed her eye with her free hand, looking like she was fighting tears and winning, but only by a tiny margin. “I could get to him because of Polaris, we’re probably only alive now because she helped us that first time… and Dylan hates her so much he prefers to lock himself up alone in his fortress than to be with me. I could get through everything … anything for him,” her voice wavered and she clenched her teeth, then her fist - she would not be defeated by her feelings. When she spoke again, however, her voice was a whisper, “but I won’t go against his will.”

Jesse sighed and looked up to the ceiling. She didn’t resent spending all those years fighting the people who’d tell her she was crazy and her brother was dead. She did it as much for herself as for Dylan, because she knew what the truth was. She didn’t resent the things she could’ve had - a new family, a normal life, merciful oblivion in the form of memory suppression and medication - and didn’t pin the blame of not having them on Dylan. Her main problem was that she always saw two possible outcomes for her life: she’d find Dylan and get him back or she’d die trying. Now she found him, but he wanted to stay away completely, and she didn’t know what to do with the black hole he left in his place. It was already starting to pull the things she’d been surrounding herself with, the things she enjoyed in this new life. It'd been the first time she trusted her luck enough to try and establish herself like that.

Emily...

The thought of Emily pulling away from her came to mind. Dragged in by the black hole, too. Jesse couldn’t let her go, but she was already going. She had to do something. What? She didn’t know. She was so stupid…

But she stayed. She stayed.

She deserves better than this.

“Don’t you think you deserve better than this, too?”

Jesse blinked, her eyes refocusing on the ceiling. Ahti’s voice brought her back from her spiral, even though she didn’t quite get what he was saying. “Huh?”

“You said it yourself, girl. You did all this for the boy. You found him, you saved him, as much as you could. He can't be a lamb - now it’s his turn to pull his weight,” he said nonchalantly.

Jesse couldn’t help but scoff at his honesty. How could he say that? Didn’t he know how much Dylan suffered? “But he thinks Polaris is evil. He was locked in the House for years, he doesn’t—”

“Yes, yes. He has bats in the belfry, he’s against the pines. He loves you, but can't find his steps in the dark. You must not climb the tree arse first, you can’t guide his hand." Ahti shook his head gravely.

“He must be so exposed by now…” The thought made Jesse's heart race. The Hiss must be onto Dylan again, and she couldn't help but picture him running scared... 

“He chose it when he threw you at waterfowl.” Ahti reminded her.

“What?” She frowned. Then blinked and refocused. “Anyway, it’s not his fault!” She raised her voice without noticing.

“Still his choice.” Ahti, like her, was also in his fourth or fifth glass, but he was entirely sober. He took a generous swig.

“I—!” Jesse grunted, “I need to keep him safe, Ahti!”

Ahti’s features softened. “You can’t rescue a drowning person if they drag you down with them, girl.”

“But I can’t leave him!” She opened her arms and let them fall to her sides, huffing in frustration. “Not again…”

“Who said anything about leaving, saatana ?” He frowned. “You’re waiting, eh? Waiting and getting strong, surrounding yourself with good people and good things too, and when time comes you bash his head in with love like it was a mace and drag him back into your life.”

“Pfft,” Jesse snickered, a sound between pitiful and amused. Sometimes she really wondered if Ahti murdered someone, the way he talked. “I’d like to do that, yeah.” She shook the glass gently, watching as the liquid inside swirled. "But how can I live when he's there, suffering?" 

"You keep him in your heart, that's how. But it's big and it has a lot of space for other things too - like yourself. And lady scientist…" He had this knowing look about him, and Jesse felt her cheeks burning all of a sudden.

"She's great." She smiled. Great was an understatement; Emily was like seeing sunshine in the morning, she could absolutely brighten the room with her smile and her excitement. Jesse wanted to hold her so much... 

Ahti chuckled. "You are in resin for lady scientist. Like the sun over Naantali, ha! That is a good place to start."

“I’m wha— start what?" She raised an eyebrow.

"Thinking about what you want! Those are the things you must put in your life, eh? So you make it good! 

"Well it's not that easy, Ahti. Not when I fucking hurt her in all of this!" Jesse combed her hair back with her fingers in a heavy motion. "I don't know how I can show her I won't do that again. I don't even know if I won't."

It was Ahti's turn to raise an eyebrow. "So you will?"

"No!" She replied automatically, a bit outraged even.

"And why do you say you don't know, when you just told me?"

"Because I can panic again! It can be a different situation! I just— I can't choose between them!"

"So why do you force yourself to?"

"Because Dylan might make me do it again and I need a solution!" She grunted in a tired way. Ahti nodded.

"You already have it," he said. 

Oh yeah Ahti, great! How could I not have seen this before, it was just beside the "the true treasure is the friends you made along the way" in the fortune cookie department in my head…

Ahti chuckled, then mimicked her, badly: "Dylan will make me do it again, Ahti. I'm letting my brother decide, Ahti, and I think it is good thing. Bah. Ja lehmät lentää."

He gave her a pointed look. Jesse shifted her weight, uncomfortable. It was the truth, she knew it deep inside, but that didn't mean she was ready to face it like that. 

"The boy is your brother, but it doesn't mean you can let him slip away from the glove. He has to learn many things again, and you," Ahti pointed at her, "will teach him with the good or the bad but eh, tantrums happen, like any boy."

"But will he understand, will he…" she struggled to find words, "forgive me?" Jesse's shoulders sagged.

"You can't jump onto walls because of that. You can make a home for him and hope."

A home… The reality that Jesse was homeless and likely still being searched for by the ward hit her right in the chest. She would eventually get money, as the Director, but she still didn't have a clue as to how getting a house, or an apartment more likely, would work. She needed Emily's help to figure this out. Especially because the first image that came to mind when Jesse thought of home was of Emily sitting on a nice couch with a blanket and a book, and Jesse bringing her a cup of tea and leaning down to kiss her…

God, she was further down the hole than she realized, wasn't she? They had one afternoon/night as a couple, and she was already fantasizing about how it would feel to sleep in Emily's arms, and how it would be to wake up by her side…

Once again, Ahti chuckled. "Why don't you tell her?"

"What, that I'm creepy about her?" Jesse raised her eyebrows. "Sure, why not. What could go wrong."

"Young people, jumalauta ! No poetry at all!" He shook his head. "Do you fear looking like you’re pissing honey? You already do, smiling fool. I just say her name and there you are."

"I don't—"

He gave her a look. She huffed, and blushed more.

"But most of all, you have to be honest with her, saatana . Tell her about your problem with your brother and your thoughts. Make nails with heads, girl, and stop talking around the porridge. Walls are for keeping people out, so get out your hammer, hm?""

Jesse blinked. “Get out my…. hammer. Right.” That didn’t make sense at all. She wasn’t going to demolish anything, and even if she was, she didn’t need a hammer; she had a very powerful telekinetic blast she could use, courtesy of Polaris’.

Ahti grunted like an old, tired dog. “Use that heart of yours, since your head is frozen.”

Jesse nodded reluctantly after a moment. Even if she didn’t understand half of what Ahti said, the part she did was a lot. Being vulnerable and telling Emily everything was giving her more anxiety than telling her about Polaris. She hadn’t cared this much about what Emily would think then, though. Still, Emily hadn't doubted or ridiculed her even once. She wouldn't do it over this, either.

"Thanks Ahti," Jesse smiled, massaging her shoulder. "Sorry for bothering you with that."

"It's alright. You're assistant, I am senior - I have duty to help you out," he gave her an affectionate smile. "What do you want to do now?"

"I don't know. I should go back, I think? There's a lot to do…"

"Mm. You were the one who asked for a day here," Ahti finished his glass, put it down on the counter with finality and pointed to the door outside, "the weather is good, I might put some meat to burn. You can join if you want."

Jesse's mouth watered instantly at the thought of barbecue. Months of eating the same rations in the Oldest House made her crave anything different, even if it was a burnt roadside diner hamburger, so this felt like a king's feast; there was no way she'd miss it.

— 

Jesse woke up feeling genuinely rested, something that hadn't happened for days now. She got up to an empty dorm, which meant she either overslept or another crisis exploded somewhere in the House. Both things were bad in their own way, but if it was a crisis she'd rather be present to deal with it. She didn’t like the idea of letting people be in danger if she could do something, so her instincts kicked in and made her alert even though she wasn't properly awake yet. 

She found Central Executive a little emptier than usual, and she couldn't quite place who was missing from it, watching from the upper floor. Her alertness intensified; was there really something going on? Her eyes darted to the corner Arish was always on, he'd be able to give her quick answers. He wasn't there, either. In his place, a ranger was in the middle of studying floor plans.

Shit.

Jesse almost dashed straight to the lower floor with no thought spared for anything in her way, but she managed to hold herself enough to make her way down there in a civilized manner. She approached the ranger, and he straightened his posture when he saw her.

"Director Faden, ma'am."

"Hi, is everything okay? Where's Arish?"

"Yeah, no attacks. Arish is down in Research with some other rangers escorting Dr. Pope and her lab coats. They needed to do some science, I guess."

Jesse released some tension on her back she didn't even know she had been holding.

"Oh. Okay, thanks for the info. Anything I should know about? I'm going after them."

"I wasn't privy to the details, ma'am, sorry."

"No problem - and you can call me Jesse. Later!"

Her steps brought her automatically to the control point, her mind wondering where the scientists would be in the Research Sector. The acoustics lab in Central Research was a safe bet… 

She stopped right below the Black Pyramid. What was she going to do once she found them? Catch up with the research, of course, but then would she simply try to snatch Emily for a private conversation in the middle of her sacred science endeavor? That wasn't a good idea. So what did she have on her schedule for today? Fighting more Hiss, the ever-present task, but also it'd been some days she didn't check on the Mold situation with Underhill or shine some light at the plants in Investigations. She knew which one she preferred.

—

The plants were great listeners, as always. She felt her chest lighter after telling them about her conversation with Ahti and what she planned on telling Emily, and even though they couldn't talk back, the way they glowed up with the attention comforted Jesse a little. She could pretend it was because they approved of her monologue, and not because of the light shining on them. By the way, would they become like the other plants in Research if she brought them back? Would they start craving words and not light anymore, or was the key the attention and care dispensed towards them? That was something she was curious about, and Emily would like to find out for sure. She'd have so much fun with it...

Jesse smiled softly, unknowingly, as she bent down to grab the plant she named Sunny (The plants in Investigations were all named after bright things. It seemed fitting.) to bring along. 

She teleported to the middle of the Ritual Division, following Polaris' guidance, and startled the hell out of a couple of researchers who were fiddling with equipment near the control point. One of them even fell on his ass, and Jesse apologized profusely while also suppressing the laughter at their surprised expressions. The ranger escorting them was having the same reaction.

"Where is Emily and the rest of the researchers, by the way?" 

They directed Jesse to the HRA lab, and she dashed through Protective Studies with her usual carelessness, but stopped to straighten her clothes as she arrived at the door - not that her mix of spare clothes found at the Bureau and leather jacket was anywhere as sharp as the director's suit, but… well, she had this drive to look a bit more presentable when Emily was around.

No one was expecting a visit when she opened the door. The rangers stood with their firearms trained at her, the researchers froze in place - but the first thing Jesse noticed was Emily raising her head amongst the chaos and opening a bright smile upon seeing her.

"Jesse, hi! What brings you here…" Emily cocked her head to the side, curious, "with a plant?"

"This is Sunny," Jesse said automatically, and blushed as soon as the words left her mouth. Well, nowhere to go but forward. "She's one of the plants from Investigations, the ones I told you about. But that's not what I— I just want to know what you're doing here today, and if I can help in any way."

Jesse, you're so smooth it hurts. Really. It's too much.

Polaris swirled in view, her prisms turning in what Jesse recognized as cheeky amusement. Jesse mentalized the image of herself sticking her tongue out to Polaris and hoped dearly she got the hint, but she didn’t react to it.

"Oh. Come in, please, you don't have to wait at the door, " Emily snickered - so beautiful - and Jesse's stomach did a flip. "We're prototyping a device to adapt Hedron Resonance to the House's comms system. Let me walk you through it."

In true Emily fashion, the impromptu class was packed with information Jesse didn't understand and a summary in a more understandable language. Emily spoke fast and with enthusiasm, and the spark in her eyes was enrapturing. She walked Jesse through their processing of the black rock and how they were making sound dishes with prism cores. The plan was to switch the ones in the speakers throughout the Oldest House in order to make them able to broadcast the Hedron wavelength, reaching places far from the control points.

"We intend to test these initial prototypes on the speakers in the Mail Room, since the broadcasting equipment is already there." Emily finished, with an air of pride.

"That's a hell of an operation, Emily. Wow." Jesse carded her fingers through her hair, taking a look around the room. It was so busy one could forget the bureau was almost empty otherwise. "It's amazing. You've been leading these people brilliantly."

"Really? Because I can see at least three points worth of caution here, starting with what we'd do about the House making areas not accessible to us where the Hiss could hide." Emily said good naturedly, joking but also not.

"That's why you're the Head of Research and I'm the girl who throws forklifts at the Hiss." Jesse shrugged, unbothered. 

"You throw forklifts at the— Jesse what the fuck?!" Emily's jaw dropped. "Those things are bureau machinery!"

"And they explode!" Jesse grinned. "It's such a good way to end them quickly."

“God, the costs…” Emily shook her head.  “Nevermind, not the point right now. I fear we won’t need your help until we set up the system.” She gave Jesse an apologetic look, and placed a hand on her arm lightly, stroking it with her thumb. Even if it was a small gesture of affection, it made Jesse smile inside. “Anything else you might need here?”

You.

“No, but I’d like to talk later, when you have a moment. It’s nothing bad, promise.” Jesse’s voice lowered with each word. She was suddenly scared Emily wouldn’t want to talk to her - that spending time together would be painful, and she needed to stay away for a time. 

Instead, she was met with a curious and slightly concerned look, and a squeeze on her arm. "Of course. Can we do it over lunch?"

"It's a… sensitive matter. Some privacy would be appreciated."

"Ah," Emily raised her eyebrows and nodded, understanding dawning on her, "after work, then."

"As long as I'm not sleeping by then, the way you work non-stop…" Jesse snickered.

"Well excuse me, someone's got to take us out of this lockdown, Miss Director!"

Jesse groaned, hiding her face for a second, and Emily laughed.

"I'll wait in Central Executive, okay? Meanwhile, I have to kick some Hiss butt…"

"With a plant?" Emily cocked her head to the side, amused this time. Jesse finally noticed she had been carrying Sunny this whole time - she must've looked like a fool.

"N-no, I'm going to drop her somewhere safe before I go. Anyway. Yeah. See you?"

Emily's gaze softened, and it was so sweet and affectionate Jesse almost forgot herself and leaned in to kiss her right there, with everyone around them. "See you, Jesse."

Her hand lingered a little more on Jesse's arm before she withdrew it, and Jesse felt the ghost sensation of her fingers almost burning through the jacket. The memory of their kisses under Hedron came full force to compel her to action. She closed her hands in fists and stood her ground, holding herself despite herself, but she was enraptured by the sight of Emily - and she wasn't diverting her attention somewhere else, either.

They were in dangerous territory.

"Hey Faden! Glad I could catch you here!"

Arish and two rangers walked through the once hidden passage to Central Research, mercifully breaking the spell and drawing everyone's attention. There was some blood on Arish's shirt, but he looked fine, if tired.

"Arish— what's up?" Jesse noticed how the rangers looked more alert, guarding the other's backs like something was going to arrive at any second.

"That Hiss monster who goes invisible and has the flappy things—"

"Hiss Distorted," Emily informed.

"Yeah, this one! It's there near the Cafeteria. The others are still there fighting, if you can—"

Jesse gave Emily a last look, put Sunny down, nodded and was already running out of the lab before Arish could finish his sentence.

"Take care of the lab!" She shouted over her shoulder.

Arish didn’t have time to acknowledge it before she vanished.

—

Jesse's day consisted of fighting the Hiss in Research, fighting the Hiss in Containment, fighting the Hiss in Maintenance (she thought she was done with them in Energy Converters, why did they keep coming back?!), trying to find another escaped Altered Item (seriously, how did a water cooler get out of its cell?!) and fighting the Hiss in Containment again. By the time she made it back to Central Executive she was a wreck. She needed a shower and food, but of course the first thing she got was some people reporting Underhill had asked for her in the Mold threshold with urgency. She sighed and turned back to the control point. Duty called.

Underhill wanted Jesse to go over proper Mold handling with the rangers once more because there had been an incident, and so Jesse had to suffer through a lecture that lasted forever and the beginning of a headache. She was very annoyed when she got back to Central Executive, determined to not let anyone stand between her and a shower - she wouldn't go meet Emily in that state, and she needed to unwind. Ironically, Emily was waiting for her by the control point when she arrived, and that was all Jesse needed to completely forget her past hour or so.

“Hey Jesse!” Emily had her usual smile on. “The rangers told me you were with Underhill… Is everything okay down there?”

“She had her weekly session of draining my life force through pointless monologuing, so I guess it is,” Jesse said, half jokingly.

Emily held a snicker, and gave her a sympathetic look. “Do you still want to talk? I don’t mind waiting if you’re tired…”

“Yes!” She blurted out quicker than Emily could finish, then blushed when she realized her own eagerness. “Yes I do. I need a shower, though. Can’t be carrying mold spores out there.”

“Understandable. I’ll go eat something in the meantime.”

“Perfect. See you in half an hour!”

If Emily knew more of Jesse’s bath habits, she’d know she was able to bathe perfectly and be presentable in about 15 minutes, due to her lifestyle and the sort of places she had to have showers in. Jesse asking to meet her in thirty minutes wasn’t because she wanted to give her time to eat; it was because she was going to take extra time to go through the clothes available and make sure she was looking good, in a casual way. That was why, when the time came, she was standing on the control point with her damp hair tied back in a high ponytail, a bureau standard dress shirt with its sleeves rolled up and her beloved old jeans and boots.

Emily stopped for a second when she saw her, wide-eyed, and then remembered herself. “Are we going somewhere nice?”

“I guess?” Jesse had her hands in her pockets and a small smile on her lips. “We’re headed down to Maintenance.”

Emily seemed more curious than disappointed by Jesse’s choice, which was good. She nodded and started walking towards the elevator, but Jesse stopped her on her tracks and turned her back towards the control point.

"We're going by different means today." Jesse was buzzing with excitement, and a little anxiety too.

Emily didn't take long to realize what she was talking about, and got equally excited. "You mean teleportation? But how… Is it doable? How do you know it won't rip me apart in the process?"

"Polaris would be buzzing alarms in my ear if that was going to happen, she wouldn't let me hurt you unknowingly like that. She likes you, you know." As if to confirm it, Polaris spun markedly on Jesse's sight. Emily smiled, too.

"It's comforting to hear that, thanks."

"Great! So, excuse me…" Jesse positioned herself in front of Emily and placed her hands on her arms, a bit awkwardly. She concentrated on her destination, feeling the energy flux extending from Central Executive and branching out to all the other Control Points - a web, a tree, a vascular system - energy overtaking and stretching her until she blinked and she was staring at the impossible skies down in the upper part of the Quarry.

She got to see Emily's confused blink and the subsequent amazed smile as she realized what happened. A smile like the sun.

"That's incredible! Oh my god, I have so many impressions, I have to write this all down!"

Jesse wanted to cup her face, join their foreheads and kiss her softly. 

"Be my guest." She shrugged, a hint of humor to her words. "As long as we're near the Control Point, no Hiss will bother us. We have all the time in the world."

Emily didn't waste time to grab a notepad and pen from her pocket, and Jesse took a step back reluctantly, to give her some space. She walked out of the walled part near the point and sat down at the edge of the path, legs dangling in the air. Far down below a team of maintenance workers mined more black rock prisms, guarded by a team of rangers.

"You have to tell me how you did this and what it feels like to you," Emily came after her a moment later, writing furiously on her notepad. She frowned, then lifted her pen and looked at Jesse. "But we can do that later. You wanted to talk?"

"Yeah, uh…" Jesse gestured to the spot beside her, and Emily sat down there, "thank you."

"For what?" Emily looked at her curiously.

"For everything. You're amazing."

"I could say the same about you, miss unlikely-but-absolutely-fitting savior."

"I'm yet to take us out of here," Jesse reminded her, chuckling. Then, a pause. "What do you want to do once we're out?"

"I'm going to see my father," Emily said instantly, "he must be so worried, I can't take it…"

She put a hand over her heart and her eyes got distant, clearly imagining how things were going outside. 

Jesse remembered what Emily told her about her youth, how her father took care of her after they kicked her mother out. He had to be a nice man. "I'll work harder to end this shit so you can go see him, promise."

Emily shook her head. "You already work yourself to exhaustion, Jesse, don't think I don't notice it."

"Well, so do you!" Jesse replied, faking a pout. 

"Pfft, that's easy when you have so much fascinating data and the hardest of problems to tackle, but I digress - what do you want to do once we're out of here?"

Jesse looked away, to the sky. "I don't know. It's not like I have anything out of here… besides a backpack that must've been thrown out in a ditch by now, so yeah, nothing."

Emily blinked. "So you have nowhere to go?"

"Nope. Unless you count the ward goons that are probably still trying to drag me back there, that is." Jesse chuckled, but Emily remained serious.

"You're going home with me," Emily announced, her tone indicative of a decision not open for further discussion.

Jesse's eyes got wide. "What?! But Em—"

"No but! There's no way I'm going to leave you on a couch in the Director's office when I can offer a cozy folding bed couch in my living room. It's decided."

Jesse looked like a child who wanted to hide behind an adult in embarrassment. Her cheeks burned, probably red like the ripest of tomatoes. "I don't want to be a bother…"

"Oh please, you are nothing of the sort. Based on my observations I'm sure you'll arrive and immediately offer to do four different house tasks and breakfast, the way you are."

That was likely true, and it only made her blush harder. Especially the thought of making Emily breakfast; that was so enticing...

"That depends on what you like for breakfast, to be honest."

"I usually skip it. Too caught up getting myself ready to work…"

Jesse gasped. "Unacceptable! I'll make you the best breakfast, Jesse style, that's decided." She held a hand out for Emily to shake.

Emily shook it. "Looking forward to it."

Both of them took a moment to giggle at the silliness of it all. It was nice.

“So, uh, I was talking to Ahti…” Jesse began.

“Ahti, the janitor? Wasn’t he on vacation?” Emily furrowed her brow.

“Yeah”

“And he came back to talk to you?”

“No, I went to his cabin. In a dream,” Jesse stated very matter-of-factly.

“Ah, intriguing! Go on.”

“He told me a lot of things, in his weird way. Made me realize I don't know what I'm doing."

Emily looked very supportive when she heard that. "That's fine. Nobody expects you to know all the intricacies of Directorship being here for just two months—"

"That's not it," Jesse turned a small rock on her fingers, fixing her gaze on it, "I mean in life. I, uh…" She blew some air. It was hard to put this into words. She rehearsed it a lot in her mind before, and yet it was still lodged in her throat, struggling to get out. "My life's goal has been finding Dylan, but there's nothing I can do for him for now. I have to live meanwhile, but I've lived for this - for him - for so long, it took over everything... I don't want it to continue like this. Not now that I have more things I want in my life. You, more than anything else."

Surprise was clear in Emily's expression, in the way her nostrils flared and her eyes widened, but she opted to say nothing and let Jesse continue. Jesse wished Emily gave her a hint, anything really, so she wouldn't feel like a fool about to have an anxious breakdown upon speaking her heart. Still she went on; Ahti told her to be vulnerable, so that was what she'd do.

"Guess what I'm trying to say is I want to be better. I want to learn how to do things right, have a life that's mine, to…" She looked straight at Emily's eyes and her words got stuck in her throat once more. Just open your heart, fuck it. "To love you like you deserve."

"Jesse—"

"I'm not saying it has to be now," Jesse added quickly, like she just realized it was a good thing to clarify, "or anytime soon! I don't want to rush anything, I can wait. I'm good at waiting. And honestly…" she trailed off, looking down at the Quarry again, "we don't even have to be together if you don't want to." The way her voice dropped in energy said otherwise. "I can understand that. I just want to have you around, and be your friend the best I can. You're so good, Em. I want to do right by you. I'm so sorry…"

"Jesse I told you, it's okay…" Emily put a hand over her forearm, stroking it with her thumb.

"Is it, though? I hurt you, you said it yourself. You knowing why it happened doesn't make it better, and god, I won't let myself get caught in that situation ever again. Ahti was right; I let Dylan control everything. I love him but it's my life , he can't do that. I have to stand my ground." Jesse worked up the courage to look at Emily again, and it was pathetic, she knew, but she was shaking a little. The next part came out quietly. "I just have to learn how to not panic when he does. I think I'll need help."

Emily's expression was understanding. She squeezed Jesse's forearm and gave her a smile. "I'll help as much as I can, but you know you need more than me to do this, right?"

Jesse nodded. "Yeah. I just hate so much seeing him hurting…"

"But hurting yourself to make him feel better isn't good, Jesse."

"Myself? No, that's fine." Jesse wriggled her eyebrows and smiled to signal it was a joke, but Emily knew very well it wasn't. "Others? Not at all."

"What if hurting yourself hurts others too?"

 Jesse tilted her head a little, silent, expecting her to elaborate.

Emily continued. "I hate to see you hurting so much, Jesse."

Jesse felt like a fool, having her own words turned at her like that. She didn't know what to say to Emily in the face of that. 

"If you're not going to care about yourself, try to do it for the people who care about you, at least for a while - me, Ahti, Arish, your plant friends…"

"That's a low blow, invoking the plants like that," Jesse mumbled, snickering.

"Oh, I'll play all my cards if it means I'll see you well." 

"And here I thought Arish was the gambler." Jesse shook her head.

"He may be, sure - but I'm the winner." Emily gave her a cheeky smile, and Jesse felt the temperature rise suddenly. So hot.

She felt the urge again, to cup Emily's face and lean forward to kiss her, to feel her, to make her gasp and moan and mumble her name. She held fast, though. Not the time. Not the situation.

A glint of recognition passed through Emily's eyes and she bit her lip, gaze fixed on Jesse. Was she holding herself back, too? Did she also want those things? Was it as difficult for her to manage as it was for Jesse?

Time to change the subject.

"Do you like stars, Emily?" Jesse looked up to the Quarry sky.

There, Emily's interest was piqued. "I do, I suppose, but what really drew me into Astronomy was the yet unexplained and crazy phenomena happening pretty much everywhere. So much to discover… Did you know the stars here don't match any of our star charts? This is definitely not our sky." 

Jesse smiled. When she first arrived in the Oldest House she thought it was jarring how Emily could jump subjects easily and keep talking, fast and enthusiastic, about tangential information. Now she thought it was endearing. It was something so uniquely hers...

"I figured. I tried to find some old friends here but it didn't happen. You know, Ursa major, Orion. The easier ones."

"So you like stars," Emily said it like it was a breakthrough moment, "I knew it!"

"Blame the one I got in my head," Jesse chuckled.

Polaris appeared twinkling happily around Jesse's head, as if saying "that's me!". It made Emily laugh.

"You two are adorable."

Jesse frowned, mock offended. "Adorable? I'm not adorable. I'm fearless and cool, a little bit dashing too." She gave the best impression of a cocky action hero smile she could.

"I'm not denying any of that, though I find your claims to be just a little dashing far too modest, to be true. That said, you're also very adorable. A great example is when you blush like that."

"I—"

Emily chuckled, leaning her head on Jesse's shoulder. Jesse felt it like static running through her spine, a fluttering in her stomach, a burst of energy boosting her senses. A desire to grin like a fool. To hold that woman to her chest, breathe her in, cuddle her to sleep...

Instead, she leaned on Emily too, and worked up the courage to ask for consent. "Can I… hold you?"

Emily got very quiet. Jesse thought she might have overstepped, she was ready to apologize, but then Emily took her hand and interlaced their fingers. It wasn't exactly what Jesse asked, but she felt giddy all the same. 

They stood in silence for a while, enjoying the calm, the view and the warmth of their presence. There was no pressure to say anything. 

"Em?"

"Mm?"

"We should do this more. Come here, chill, talk about nothing. It's nice."

"It's a date," Emily agreed.

Jesse could bet that choice of words was intentional, because apparently Emily liked to see her shiver and grin like a foolish teenager. Adorable, Emily said? Jesse didn't mind. She was very happy she followed Ahti's advice - it seemed paranatural grandpas with just a hint of senility gave great relationship advice. 

-- 

Chapter Text

The sound of sudden air displacement - a strong whoosh! - echoed through Central Executive, and Director Faden appeared in the middle of the control point. She was holding onto two big crates as high as her chest. While most of the people were gracious enough to go back to their tasks after a beat, some kept staring in assorted levels of subtlety. Arish, who was previously hearing the reports of a group of rangers, ran to meet her. He meant to help with the crates, but she levitated them before he could get close.

She placed the crates next to the table where the guard in charge of the weapon inventory could usually be found, for ease of access. Arish was very excited about it all.

"Where did you find them, boss?" he asked, watching as Jesse made the lids of the crates fly off with a gesture.

"A room that got shifted into the ceiling next to Darling's black rock lab in Maintenance. The places where I keep finding rooms, I swear..."

"Oof, the House really throws them in shitty places, huh?" Arish swung his arms back and forth, measuring the crates with his eyes. One of them had a blood splatter on it.

"You have no idea. I once found a whole bathroom shifted right into a bleed in the Astral Plane, nasty stuff." Jesse heard her own pun in her head - someone call a plumber! - and Polaris appeared glinting cheerfully in the corners of her sight. Jesse groaned internally, prompting a series of chimes that could very well be laughter from her resonance friend. She would never let this one go, would she?

"Anyway, here we have a couple of heavy guns, some pistols… and it looks like a lot of ammo!" Jesse stuck her arm inside one of the boxes and narrated her findings. She didn't take the ammo out, instead motioning for Arish to come over. "What do you think?"

He took some steps forward and peeked in. "Those look like a few days without worrying about ammo, it'll help a lot. Thanks Faden."

Jesse nodded. "Sorry I couldn't find the armory yet."

"It's not your fault - shit, you've been doing more than anyone else here. It's all on the hiss."

Jesse's lips curled up in a small smile after that. It was good to hear acknowledgement of her efforts. "Thanks, Arish. I'm going to check in with Emily now."

"Sure, see you later - and please make her stop and rest for a change. God knows she only listens to you."

Jesse nodded in acknowledgement and almost ran up the stairs to the Board Room. She feared Arish could see the blushing that was rising on her cheeks after his comment.

She opened the door and was immediately taken aback by the sight of Emily asleep on her usual chair. Her head nodded forward, and a folder was slipping off her lap, it's contents spilled all over the floor.

A wave of affection washed over Jesse upon the sight, and she stepped closer as quietly as she could. What should she do? The dorms were definitely a better place to sleep than the Board Room, she could carry Emily there without waking her up. That would definitely cross a boundary, though, and she wasn't comfortable with doing so without Emily's knowledge. It would also attract gossip - not that Jesse minded, but she knew Emily preferred to keep it in check.

Another option was to grab a blanket and put it over her on the chair. Jesse knew the room tended to get colder the more time you spent inside. If she was going to the dorms to get it, though, she might as well grab the whole sleeping kit - mattress, blanket and pillow - and bring it to her. It wasn't like it would be a problem, considering her abilities.

Jesse was in and out in a moment, and came back to the Board Room with the mattress floating behind her and the other items in her arms. She arranged them outside of the elevated platform in the middle and approached Emily, shaking her shoulder lightly.

"Hey, Emily. Wake up."

Emily didn't do more than grunt and move a little on her spot. Jesse looked at the door, back at Emily, and at the mattress. She then took the file from Emily's lap and put it on the table. Stopped. She looked at Emily again, and noticed the bags under her eyes were even deeper than hers, which was quite the feat. How much had she been pushing herself, and for how long? Jesse didn’t have it in her to wake her up in this condition. She picked her up carefully and took her to the mattress, placed her down and tucked her in, lingering to give her a last look before going out. Truth be told, she wanted to stay and guard her sleep, to occasionally take a glance to the side, see her cute, unbothered expression and fill her heart with love... If only things could be this peaceful for everyone, but no, they had an alien sound to eradicate and a lockdown to lift. Life really wasn't fair to her.

Jesse hoped Emily could rest well this time. She even wrote a sign on a sheet of paper and stuck it to the door: Dr. Pope sleeping - DO NOT DISTURB .

Dr. Saba was ascending the steps to the Board Room with a binder in hand when Jesse was affixing the sign. He let out a thoughtful little noise when he saw what it was about.

"So she finally went to sleep? Good, we were worried about it."

Jesse turned to look at him, eyebrows raised. "What do you mean? Did she overwork herself more than usual?"

He cleared his throat, hesitating like he just realized he said too much. "She'd been awake for more than two and a half days last I checked, ma'am. She kept saying she was too close to an answer in her equations to stop whenever we tried to make her rest."

Two and a half? That sounded like Emily alright: always so excited about discovery she'd neglect her own wellbeing. Jesse understood - in fact, she often got so caught up with her duties that she did the same thing - but that didn't mean it was a good practice. They could both use the rest, and if it depended on Jesse, at least Emily would.

"I'll have to talk to her about it when she wakes up," Jesse said. "Are you and the other researchers able to keep going without her for now?"

"We'd have to shift focus to a different part of the experiment but sure, it can be done."

Experiment…? Oh yes, in the middle of her whirlwind of tasks Jesse forgot the whole Mail Room thing. They'd be able to test it soon, from what Emily told her.

"Glad to hear that. Is there anything else you need, besides talking to Emily?"

Dr. Saba hummed in thought. "Not at the moment, no. I'll go back and inform the others."

Jesse nodded, and gave a little tap to the sign she just affixed. "If you need anything from inside, be careful not to wake her up, okay? I have to go deal with some other business."

"Have a good day, Director, ma'am."

--

The other business Jesse had was going to the room with the glass cell and spending some time with Dylan. She'd tell him about her day, her thoughts and feelings, the weird things she found on her excursions throughout the House, all sorts of things. Even though she knew he was probably too far away to listen, she hoped at least his subconscious would recognize her voice as something familiar.

She knew deep down she did it more for herself than for him; she had to let things out somehow, and Emily wasn't always available.

"So I guess that's it, if the tests succeed we'll have a way to sweep the Hiss off the floors methodically and we'll finally be able to get out of here." Jesse was sitting like a ragdoll on a chair by Dylan's bed, every limb pointing to a different direction. Even though it looked uncomfortable, it was actually very relaxing for her.

Dylan, of course, didn't answer. The only sounds present were the electric humming of the life support equipment.

"I'd love it if you changed your mind and decided to wake up by then. We'd be able to certify you're healthy and then get out with everyone. We could go to a pizza place and buy an unholy amount of it! I'm sure the FBC can deal with this little compensation for us, we fucking deserve it." She chuckled, thinking about herself absconding with Bureau's resources like an old cartoon thief. "Or maybe we should go somewhere with trees and grass. It would be a nice change from all this concrete." For him especially, having spent all those years in a cold, sterile cage. He spent seventeen years without seeing the sun, too - he'd need special sunscreen for a while.

There were so many things Dylan was deprived of. He was taken when the internet was still slow and tricky, people still rented movies and the only relevant Amazon was the rainforest. How would he react to this new world? Jesse told him about some of the changes when they were in the dream and he was surprised, sure, but in that town of theirs things could look and work however they wanted. Out there in the real world things weren't so mindful of their wishes.

"I think you'll love how much videogames have improved." Jesse smiled at the thought, remembering how Dylan was the one to spend the most time on their old Nintendo 64. He kept throwing the fact their mother bought it for him at Jesse's face, it made her so mad. Their mother refused to buy a controller for her, too, because it was unworthy of a lady to play those violent games. Guess what? Jesse had never been ladylike. In fact, Dylan was more proper than she would ever have been, and sibling's bickering aside, he would always let her play. They were saving money to buy a secondhand controller so they could do it together... "We'll get to play together again, bro. I'll buy you the coolest games, promise."

Not only games, but she'd buy everything he wanted. she would spoil him so much - that was what her Director's salary was for, right? That, to buy a house and get gifts for Emily. She could donate a little too, help homeless people and orphans like she'd been. That sounded like a good plan. And plants!

"You also have to wake up to tell me how you'd like your bedroom, that's important! Emily told me to try and picture the place I'd like to live, and it would be cool if you could do that too."

She sighed and ran a hand through Dylan's hair. It grew a lot these three months, as well as his beard. Jesse noticed she'd have to trim it soon, like she always did. Not a problem.

"Besides, if you don't wake up soon you're going to risk me getting creative with your hair, and I can assure you, that would be a disaster." She giggled. "I once tried to give myself a sidecut and it was so bad I had to wear a beanie until it grew back. I'm good at trimming the edges, though. I don't know why."

Jesse tried to picture Dylan with a huge mohawk, punk style, painted pink and purple. It would look good on him. A weird good. Or maybe he could have his current hair dyed ginger, like he was when he was a kid. That was a little more difficult to imagine, but she was sure he could pull it off. Maybe he'd like it so much he'd try to dye her hair, and she'd walk into the bureau with badass white hair one day. She'd like that.

"Love you, Dylan." Her smile was sad, and she felt so, so tired despite the daydreaming. "I'm sorry I can't be how you want right now, but I still want to be with you. I miss you so much."

She sat there for a moment longer, in silence. Her mind went to her whole journey through the dreams, the time in their city, Emily's arrival and departure, and the last days that led to her own expulsion. Why couldn't things be simple for once? Why did she always have to fight tooth and nail for the things she wanted, and even then she could never be completely fulfilled? She wanted her brother.

It was his choice, she reminded herself, sighing internally. There were things she couldn't control.

What she could control, however, was her reaction and things about her own life, the therapists always told her. She didn't have to stay around and wallow in pain for Dylan, even though her heart broke every time she stopped to think about his situation. Ahti's words came to mind: She could make sure he had a nice home to come back to when he decided to do it. She hoped to be the best home she could for him, and eventually for Emily too, even though Emily would be the one taking her to her apartment first. Jesse blushed just by thinking about it, and she shook her head as if to dismiss the thought. It wasn't the time.

Or was it? The fact Emily was so adamant on taking her home meant a lot to Jesse. It made her feel loved and wanted, and despite having never even seen Emily's place, she knew she'd be going home - because Emily was home already, somehow.

I wish Dylan could feel safety like that, too. If only he could understand…

The thought of the three of them sitting on a couch with popcorn, eating and making jokes while watching a movie was something Jesse wanted so much it physically pained her. The support, the intimacy, the comfort… Would things ever be like that? Was she too delusional for wanting her brother to find a home in them too?

It was no use wondering like that, the longing would hurt her further. She sighed and got up slowly, stretching so she wouldn't feel so stiff after sitting in that uncomfortable chair for long. She really ought to bring one of the good leather ones to replace it, and soon.

"I should go. I have things to do and people might find me here and ask me to do them, so I have to disappear for a couple of hours." She knew Dylan would support that particular decision, and it made her happy. "Bye, bro. Tell me if anything changes, okay? I'll be back tomorrow."

She left the room wondering if he'd ever get up and gossip about how the doctor for the third shift had a habit of singing old romantic songs out loud when he thought he was alone. They'd share a good laugh about it, probably roast him a bit for his tracklist. Jesse could tell him about the Langston freestyle poetry audio logs, then. That would be amazing.

—

Everybody knew Emily was her own energy generator fueled by science. She'd talk and work and talk and walk and talk and work for as long as she could while looking full of energy, then her battery would run out and she'd sleep on the first surface she could lean on. Some people thought this was the effect of a lot of coffee and/or energy drinks, but she had always been like that - too much went on inside for her to slow down, and even when she was tired and sleepy she'd still fight to at least finish her current task. If she was going to rest, she thought, it had to be for a good reason.

She knew that belief was reminiscent of her stern upbringing and unrealistic expectations, but she found a way to turn it around in her favor. A good reason to rest was keeping herself healthy, and that meant keeping a balance. It included reminding herself to stop from time to time when it wasn't urgent work, take breaks, drink water, walk a little, this sort of thing. She even got good at finding things she liked outside of work: she kept a collection of old movies she watched sometimes (and that provided her a good reason to go home), went to nice coffee shops, and walked in Central Park. It'd been difficult for her to rest properly since the lockdown began, though. An extraplanar entity invading your workplace, wreaking havoc and taking most of the personnel tended to have a bad effect on one's stability. In addition to the fact Emily was doing all she could and couldn't to get rid of the threat, it meant she rarely rested. It was okay, though; that was the toughest and most fascinating situation she ever faced in the Oldest House, but she trusted her abilities, her team and more than anything else, she trusted Jesse.

Jesse was… everything, really; their sword, their shield, their guidance. Everything would've fallen apart during the first few days if she hadn’t walked through the front doors.

There was only one matter where Emily's trust in Jesse still faltered, and that was Dylan. It still bothered her enough for her to not be able to let her feelings run free again, not while the ends were still loose. She wanted to do it to an almost desperate extent, though. Did Jesse ever notice how close Emily would get to throwing caution to the wind and kissing her, every time they were intimate and almost romantic with each other? Did she know how much Emily craved those moments where they'd go to the Quarry to fool around, and that she fantasized about being in her arms and falling asleep while making up names for constellations in that alien sky? It wasn't fair. Emily deserved better than the sort of heartbreak she got. The fact she could understand and sympathize with the reasons didn't soften the impact it had on her. 

She wanted to be special too.

Thankfully, Jesse seemed to understand what the issue was, and she was willing to put in the effort to improve herself and their relationship since their conversation at the shelter. She wasn't one to run away from things, and it filled Emily with hope for the future.

Emily woke up feeling warm and safe, a bit disoriented too. She wriggled a little to make herself more comfortable and let out a content sigh. Maybe she could stay a little longer, with how good she felt? That was rare, worth some indulgence.

The only thing that could make it better would be if Jesse was there holding her. Emily buried her face in the pillow like it was Jesse’s chest and inhaled, the familiar scent bringing all the dopamine she needed to her brain. Jesse smelled so good.

Wait.

Why did the pillow smell like her?!

Emily turned and opened her eyes - the strong light above the meeting table blinded her momentarily. She grunted, hiding her eyes with a hand.

"Emily?"

It was Jesse's voice.

This time Emily opened her eyes more carefully, away from the light. It took her a moment to realize she was in the Board Room, and then a moment more to recall the last thing she remembered, she was reading reports at the table. How did she end up on a mattress on the side of the room? Who tucked her in?

"You woke up!" Jesse appeared from behind the table with a big smile, placing a pile of binders on it. "Did you sleep well?"

"Wonderfully," Emily replied, still drunk on sleep. "Did you… put me here?" She gestured towards the mattress.

"Yeah. Couldn't leave you sleeping on a chair, could I?" Jesse crouched again and picked up another pile of binders.

"You could, actually." Emily knew she had to get up, she had a lot to do, but she was so comfortable… "I don't think bringing a bed is a very common reaction to seeing someone sleeping."

"Well, our situation is hardly common, and I’m definitely odd." Jesse shrugged. It was a good point, Emily had to concede. "And there was no way I wouldn't get you comfy on the most anticipated and rare event of the year. It's not every day Emily Pope rests, after all."

"Oh shush, you." Emily giggled and hid her face on the pillow again. Jesse's smell was all around her, and it was intoxicating. "Come here?"

Jesse was shuffling through one of the binders, but she immediately left it and went to Emily, crouching beside her.

"This is your bed." An affirmation, not a question. Emily still had her face on the pillow.

"Yeah."

"Where did you sleep, then?"

Jesse didn't answer.

Emily turned to look at her. "Jesse."

"What? It was on the couch in my office!" Jesse looked away.

"Jesse."

Jesse groaned. "I haven't slept yet, okay? I did a lot of retrieving heavy equipment and securing people from the Hiss, and it wasn't for two and a half days straight like certain researchers ." She gave Emily a pointed look.

Emily rolled her eyes. "Regardless, you should sleep."

"I'm fine."

"I said the same thing and look how I ended up." Emily gestured to herself, raising her eyebrows.

"I'm only laying down if you're there with me." Jesse crossed her arms and smirked, but Emily caught the stiffness in her posture and the uncertainty threatening to surface in her eyes. Was she worrying about being too forward when they were taking things slowly? A gamble, and she was afraid to mess things up. If she only knew how much her little flirt made the hairs on Emily's neck stand…

"Smooth, huh," Emily said. Her tone and an amused smile were all it took for Jesse's fickle confidence to falter.

"I mean— if I'm overstepping—"

Emily pulled her by the shirt, coaxing her down. "Ten minutes. We don't want someone to walk in on us like this."

The smile on Jesse's face was so beautiful, as if she couldn't believe what she heard and was realizing her luck slowly. Emily scooted back to give her space and she laid down almost too eagerly, but she approached Emily with hesitation and she definitely didn't know what to do with her hands. Given that, Emily met her halfway on the mattress.

"Hey," Emily whispered, stroking her cheek with a finger.

"Hey." Jesse replied quietly, her eyes going to Emily's lips and back. She then took Emily's hand and kissed it, holding it there; a physical barrier between them, likely to prevent her from coming in for a kiss. Quite the classy solution. It made Emily want to kiss her even more, and it was… distracting.

"What did I miss?" She asked the first thing she could think of, so they'd have something else on their minds.

"Mm… well, as I said, the Hiss tried to attack some poor maintenance workers and I was nearby to save them, there was an alert for the Ritual Division and I helped a team of rangers deal with a bunch of those Hiss who fly in chairs—"

"The Elevated?"

"Yeah, those! Annoying assholes, they keep dodging when I launch things at them."

"If I'm not mistaken they're susceptible to bullets, though."

"Oh definitely ," Jesse snickered, "then I got to shoot some Hiss nodes in the Archives - that astral spike is still there by the way - and guess what I found?"

"The Mold?"

Jesse grimaced. "Ew, no! Why would I find it there?"

"Are you asking me? You're the one who keeps finding it everywhere."

"Well thank god I didn't this time. No, I found something cool: a whole box of vinyl discs and tapes from all sorts of bands! Apparently they were being studied for altered effects or themes or something at some point, there was a file explaining it."

Music research for paranatural influences? Emily's interest was piqued. "Did you bring it back?"

"Of course I did. I knew you'd want to see it. It's on the table." Jesse looked proud of herself for that, it was sweet. "The box is outside with Arish, he said he'd find a way to set up a music player in the room people are using for breaks."

"That sounds lovely. People need all the small comforts they can get."

"Yeah… I really should wrangle that vending machine so I can cleanse it properly and bring it back here."

"The one that keeps jumpscaring you and running away? Good luck with that."  Emily snickered.

"Why, do you have a better idea?" Jesse raised a defiant eyebrow.

"Sure. We end the lockdown, of c— wait. Oh shit , I have to finish the energy threshold calculations!" Emily jumped up to her feet like she was hit by lightning, and started trying to fix her bed hair.

"Don't leave me…!" Jesse cried out, raising a dramatic hand towards Emily. She was clearly doing it as a joke, but when Emily took a glance at her to reply she saw the truth of it in her eyes.

"Rest a little, Jesse, it'll be good for you." Emily smiled softly, grabbing a handful of papers from the table and sticking them on her clipboard. "We'll resume this later."

A part of her heart broke with the disappointment in Jesse's face, but she knew the experiment was a priority now. Emily prided herself for her discipline.

Jesse nodded. "Okay. Yeah, they need you at the Mail Room - but wait!" Emily was almost at the door when she stopped. "Don't forget to go to the bathroom, eat something… you know, things we do when we wake up."

"Oh, right." Emily backtracked, leaving her clipboard at the table. "I'll be back in a minute."

It was amazing how she could forget trivial things when engrossed with work. She always relied on people to remind her: Jesse, Arish, her researchers, sticky notes she left to herself on her equipment and papers... Being human was a chore sometimes. She wouldn't trade it for anything, though.

—

Emily arrived at the Mail Room apologizing for the delay in concluding her calculations, but she was met mostly with good-natured jokes about finally resting. To her horror, she learned she had been out for approximately fourteen hours. The equipment was set up throughout the room at that time, the team figured out some of the many calculations needed to get things running, but they still depended on some of her numbers to do calibrations. She apologized effusively again and got right to work. It took the whole day even with help from her team, but they did the math and calibrated the equipment. All that was left to do was to get the primary Hedron Resonance Emitter to interact with their system — which meant they had to go get Jesse.

Emily went back to Central Research with a ranger and entered the Board Room hoping to find Jesse sleeping as she suggested, but she wasn't surprised to find the place empty. Who knew what sort of crisis Jesse had been called to deal with? She just hoped she had time to rest a little.

She was about to turn back out and seek the ranger who accompanied her when she noticed there was something on the table on her usual spot, something she didn't remember seeing when she left. When she approached, it turned out to be a music tape with a paper attached to it:

For Emily

listen to the second song (I had to show you, it says what I want better than me)

Jesse

Emily frowned, turning the tape on her hand. Whatever the original label was, it was removed and replaced by a sticker with a code she recognized as compliant to the Bureau archiving standard, so she had no clue about the tape's mysterious contents. She slipped it into a pocket, note and all, and walked out.

Once she found the ranger, she asked him to inform her team that the Director wasn't available at the moment. They'd better finish whatever they still had to do and return to Central Executive. She also inquired if the ranger squad could remain in the room to guard the equipment. She had to confirm that last part with Arish, but it was a quick agreement and the ranger was soon on his way.

They had to wait for Jesse now. It was the first bit of breathing room in days and it didn't sit right with Emily. She had just returned from an extended resting period, she had to work! The Hedron Resonance Emitters were the main project for Research right now, true, but they weren't the only one. Oliver Blake, the junior researcher from acoustics, was trying to dampen the Hiss resonance with frequencies in a length that could be broadcast without special black rock prisms; Paula Bronte's team was looking into weaponizing the HRAs; there were also the doctors trying to find a way to wake Dylan up, and afterwards apply their results to the floating people. Emily decided it was a good time to go check on these fronts.

People lost their frame of reference for day and night, as the lockdown progressed. Biological clocks now followed workshifts. It could be a dangerous thing for people like Emily, who worked too much: She spent the whole day in the Mail Room, and yet ended up far too engrossed with checking the other projects. She only realized too many hours had passed when it was time for a shift change, and she was in the middle of a discussion about the right capacitors with her peers. She could hear Jesse's voice in her head, clear as a day, telling her to take a break and eat something. It brought a little guilty smile to her lips.

—

Emily found herself in the upper floor when she finally took a break, strolling aimlessly. She could hear fragments of conversations, the distant buzz of electricity, beeping from measuring equipment. It was nice, despite being far from the usual chaos Central Executive used to be.

Her feet brought her to the room where Dylan resided. She talked to the doctor briefly, since she was already there. It amounted to a confirmation that things were at the usual point: stable condition, no progress with getting him back to consciousness. She should've exited the place, then. There was no reason for her to enter the cell, but she did it anyway. She sat on the chair beside him, looked at his resting body and sighed. He didn't want to come back, and it was such a pity... there was so much he could see and learn outside of the House, a whole life to be had now that his sister was here. They could be together, and Emily was certain they'd be happy, even if the road was to be rocky because of everything they both suffered. Jesse was the embodiment of tenacity, and her love for him was endless - they'd figure it out.

If only he would see…

"I know you probably hate me," she began, mumbling like she was thinking out loud rather than talking, "and I know this is foolish, but I see you like this and it hurts. I'd rather have you here telling Jesse I'm not trustworthy, or that she'd better not have anything to do with the Bureau. At least you'd be here with her. You'd both be happy." She looked at the heart monitor: his pulse was steady. At least his body was still being maintained by paranatural means, as Jesse's had been. "Or maybe I'm projecting too much, and as a scientist I should know better. Either way, know that you deserve a shot at living the life this place took from you. I'd like to help if you'd let me, but you have Jesse, and she'll do anything for you. She misses you so much, Dylan. She's compartmentalizing again in favor of dealing with the tasks at hand, but she's still so sad about everything. I know the decision has to come from you and I can't do anything about it, but I'm asking you to try and trust her. She won't let you down."

Emily felt foolish opening her heart like that. Dylan wouldn't care for her pleas, she knew that, but she hoped he could at least consider Jesse in all of this.

She got up from the chair and noticed the doctor had left them alone at some point. She was grateful for that.

—

Emily went back to the Board Room, quite disheartened. Dylan tended to have this effect on her after everything.

She sat down and let herself sink on her usual chair, head falling to the side. She noticed the plant Jesse gave her was there, near the empty mattress. Was it there before? It seemed to swish slightly under her gaze.

"Hello there," Emily tried, putting on a smile. "Sunny, aren't you? That's the name Jesse gave you. Do you like it?"

Sunny the plant didn't answer, but her foliage got greener and stronger with the attention. It was a wondrous sight.

"I should get you a little plaque, this way people will call you by your name. Let me…" she wrote something on a piece of paper, tore part of it away and folded it so it could stand on its own, then brought it to the plant. She placed it down on the vase, and it read: De-stressing Assistant Sunny - great listener. "There you go."

The leaves swooshed again, more noticeably this time. It looked like Sunny was waving floppy arms, and it was adorable - it definitely improved Emily's mood. She definitely could see why Jesse liked the plants so much.

She turned to go back to her seat when she saw a tape player next to the computer on the table. It hadn't seen much use besides playing her recording of the Hiss incantation. Maybe now that Jesse found a box full of music tapes she could have something more pleasant to listen to as she worked. Her hand went to her pocket instinctively, touching the tape Jesse left for her. Why not hear it now? She was curious, especially because of the note with it. 

Emily put the tape in the player and pressed play. Second song, Jesse said. She fast-forwarded the opening song to a point near it's pretentious, electronic rock opera ending, and sat down, ready to listen.

The second song started with marked percussion and an accompanying strong bass line. A sweet and a little melancholic piano melody followed, making Emily raise her eyebrows - it contrasted a lot with the first song and honestly, it was way more to her taste. Then the singing began:

Far away

This ship is taking me far away

Far away from the memories

Of the people who care if I live or die

Starlight

I will be chasing this starlight

Until the end of my life

I don't know if it's worth it anymore

Hold you in my arms

I just wanted to

Hold you in my arms

My life

You electrify my life

Let's conspire to ignite

All the souls that would die just to feel alive

And I'll never let you go

If you promise not to

Fade away

Never fade away

With our hopes and expectations

Black holes and revelations

Emily's heart was pounding against her ribcage, filling her with a buzzing feeling. Of all the things she could see Jesse sharing with her, she didn't expect such a romantic and bittersweet song, one that fit Jesse, on top of that. She could trace parallels as the song went by, and the thought that these were things Jesse wanted to tell her…  Emily was never the kind to go searching for romance, but it found her, apparently. It felt so good to be desired like that. 

She hoped Jesse would come back soon. She would very much like to jump into her arms.

—

"Did you double check the numbers?" Emily said, eyeing a checklist on her clipboard.

"Yes, Dr. Pope." A researcher replied.

"The sensors are all set," Dr. Bronte added. "The comm channel is open, we're ready to begin."

Emily nodded, turning to face Jesse. She was standing on an array of microphones, cables and signal dishes arranged in a similar way to the equipment around Control Points. She pursed her lips and let go, finding Emily's eyes on her. She gave her a little smile.

"Whenever you're ready, Jesse." Emily nodded.

They were in the control room in the back of the Mail Room, ready to start their experiment with the Hedron Resonance Emitters, and as much as Emily was confident in it, anxiety managed to creep in the corners of her mind. She could see something similar was going on with Jesse but practical as she was, she pushed it aside and put on a focused face.

Emily watched as Jesse lingered a second more and then hit the floor with her hands like a lightning strike. She never touched it, though - an invisible force resisted her with such strength it sent shockwaves outwards, filling the room with static, rippling air and a distorted chiming noise. It was Polaris' sound, Emily now knew, but full of interference.

The scientists in the room focused on their duties, announcing the status of the equipment, energy levels, all sorts of data relevant for the experiment and the health of the equipment system. Emily was supposed to oversee that, but her gaze was locked at Jesse's ferocious attempt to keep resonating despite resistance. What was the resistance, anyway? The most likely answer would be the Hiss, but there was also the chance they had other agents to factor in.

The veins in Jesse's hands and arms were bulging with the effort. Her hair floated around her as the shockwaves passed, and her eyes had that eerie glow to them, the one that appeared every time she was exerting her powers or her emotions. She was surrounded by Polaris's prisms, they spun outwards with the waves, rose and disappeared in the air. It was strange and beautiful.

Jesse slowly started lifting her hands, still struggling against something intangible for everyone else. She raised them to the level of the antenna dishes, roared and pulled away - a stronger shockwave spread from that point along with a low rumble followed by the clear sound of Polaris' resonance, flung the doors open and sailed through the Mail Room.

After that, it was as if everything stood in suspension for a moment.

"We got positive for a resonance loop!" Dr. Saba shouted from his spot down in the Mail Room.

Both rooms erupted in people stating their data, gasps and laughter, the realization that it worked, it really worked, they were broadcasting Hedron resonance in a loop throughout the place.

Jesse was panting heavily, and still looked out of it as the scientists celebrated outside the array. Emily was the one to enter the space she was in, bouncing on her heels.

"Jesse, we did it!" Emily's smile was as big as the one she had when Jesse promoted her, which was saying something. "You did it! You're amazing!"

She blinked a couple of times and turned to face Emily with a delayed motion and confused eyes. There was blood running down from her nose. "We… did?"

"Yes but— are you okay?" Emily's joy turned to worry very fast.

"Yes?" Jesse blinked the haze away and wiped the blood, not aware it left a little smudge. "That happens. I just need a second."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. Sure." Jesse blinked again, her eyes finally fixing on Emily, and she smiled. "We did it, huh?"

Emily's smile returned, and she all but threw herself at Jesse for a hug.

—

"The room irradiated Hedron Resonance for twelve and a half minutes before emitters three, nine and two broke down in sequence. We are investigating the causes right now. Despite this little setback, the experiment was an astounding success: we not only confirmed a resonance broadcast loop is achievable, but had the unexpected results of the resonance spreading further than we predicted, getting as far as the cafeteria and the Hotline Chamber, and of the floating staff starting to lower in height at the eight-minute mark of the active broadcast. This is very promising: we still have to look into reasons as to why this happened, but any outcome where they didn't become active Hiss or were disintegrated in the process is one we should pursue; we might be staring at a way of dampening the Hiss influence in subjects through prolonged Hedron Resonance exposure - in more concrete terms, a way to free infected staff that wasn't changed to a fundamental level yet."

Emily wasn't one for grand displays or instructional videos like Darling had been, but she didn't shy away from giving a lecture when it was needed. This was the first time doing so since the lockdown began: in a side of Central Executive with the surviving staff as her audience.

She felt like this was the time to give them a glimmer of hope for the future, despite optimism not being a usual practice this early in the experimentation phase. She wasn't promising anything - she knew better than that - just showing them the facts.

Morale improved as expected after the lecture, there was an air of expectation all over the place. It made Emily satisfied with her decision. People needed hope.

"Hey, hotshot."

Emily smiled at the sound of Jesse's voice even before turning to face her. They didn't have a chance to talk at all before the experiment; the scientists got a hold of Jesse and ushered her to the Mail Room the moment she appeared in Central Executive. "I hardly think I'm the hotshot when you walk around emitting protective resonance, Miss Director."

Jesse groaned and looked to the ceiling, pinching her nose like that sentence gave her a sudden headache. "God, no."

Emily chuckled. "Seriously though, Northmoor could only dream of doing all the things you’re able to do at this point. I believe he would've lost his mind trying to outdo you and failing, and that's an endlessly amusing thought."

Jesse's mind went to the NSC down on Maintenance and how the whole Bureau would've exploded if the pressure on it was stronger. She felt bad for Northmoor when she learned he was chained and sealed in a generator to be an eternal battery, maybe dead, maybe alive in a Schrodinger's cat situation, but that disappeared the more she learned about his time as Director. The man had been insufferable and had become a zealot for the Board, drunk on power. He’d pretty much brought this fate on himself. To know she was immensely more powerful than him in the telekinetic field and had her shit together made her very smug.

Thanks, friend.

Polaris twinkled happily in response.

"He might've set fire to half the FBC already," Jesse suggested.

"Quite likely." Emily raised her eyebrows. "Shall we go to the Board Room? I have a couple of things to discuss with you."

Jesse nodded, instantly more serious. They made their way to the room and Jesse sank into her chair with the pleased sigh of someone who hadn't sat down in hours. Emily wasn't in a much better state, if she was honest with herself, but she went straight to the back, picking specific things from the table.

"How are you doing, Jesse? The experiment looked like it took a lot out of you,” she said over her shoulder.

Jesse scratched the back of her neck. "I'm tired, yeah, but it's similar to when I throw too many forklifts with my mind in a short period of time. I just have to sit down and take a breath to recharge. What about you?"

Emily scoffed and turned to her. "You really should stop throwing forklifts around."

"Why? The House brings them back when I'm not around…" Jesse grinned, devious. Time to play along.

"Well maybe one day the House will get tired of your property damage and shift the nastiest pipes from Maintenance to your office, so…"

Jesse hurried and shook her head. "Please don't give it ideas!"

"Me? Never." Emily's smile said otherwise, though, and she ended up giggling. "I got what I needed, let's move."

Jesse tilted her head. "Move where? You said you had things to discuss…"

"I know, but I changed my mind on the location. I don't want anyone to walk in on the conversation."

"What the hell are we talking about? Unionizing?" Jesse snickered, eyes sparkling with curiosity. She got up with some effort and waited.

"As much as the FBC could use it, no." Emily passed by Jesse and pulled her by the jacket, keeping eye contact, until they were at the door.

Jesse staggered backwards for a second, mesmerized, blushing to the tip of her ears. It was very endearing, and so very satisfying to know she had this kind of power over her.

—

The doors were closed and locked. The light in the Director's Office was atmospheric, as always. Jesse sat down on one of the chairs before the desk, and Emily busied herself with setting up the tape player.

"I heard the song you left me," Emily started, turning one of the tapes in her hand before setting it aside and placing the other in the socket.

"You did?" Jesse's voice was suddenly fIlled with anxiety.

"Yes. It was lovely." Emily turned, and her eyes found Jesse's. "Did you really want to say all that?"

"Yeah. It was perfect for it. I could never be that good with my words." Jesse shrugged, tripping over her own words in an attempt to downplay her gesture.

Emily nodded, turned the chair beside Jesse's so it would be facing hers and sat down. She crossed her legs as a habit and leaned forward. "Are those opening lines how you feel? Drifting away?"

Jesse's eyebrows shot up and she immediately tried to go back to a neutral expression, but she looked to the floor and her shoulders still sagged. "Sometimes, when things are too much. When I think of how I messed things up between us, for example, and between Dylan and I. It feels so helpless."

Emily tilted her head, curious with the choice of words. "Even though you're taking steps to make amends with me, and giving Dylan the space he needs to figure things out?"

Jesse sunk back on her chair, sighing loudly as she combed her hair back with her fingers. "You talk like I know what I'm doing. How can I even prove to you definitely that it won't happen again? It's not like you can search my heart for the truth of it."

"Maybe not, but I can see the work you're putting into bringing us closer. It’s less a matter of unshakeable truth and more a matter of trust; I don’t expect you to be unchanging in your opinions, I want you to communicate with me, or at least try. I know it’s difficult, but you’re trying.”

“Is it working?” Jesse smiled, trying to frame it as a joke, but she’d have to get better at acting if she wanted to fool Emily. She already knew how to read her, after all.

Emily answered with a smile of her own, and got back on her feet. “You showed me your song, it’s only fair I show you mine.”

One click and the tape started playing a soft drum line, hi-hat and high tone in a very jazzy style. Recognition dawned on Jesse. Emily motioned for her to come closer and she got up, a little laid back. Was she blushing?

Fly me to the moon

Let me play among the stars

Let me see what spring is like on

Jupiter and Mars

“Uh…” Jesse was about to ask, but Emily grabbed her by the hand and pulled her away from the desk.

In other words, hold my hand

In other words, baby kiss me

There was some trouble on Jesse’s part about where to place her hands when Emily’s pull turned into a skillful waltzing arc, and Emily chuckled at how they both tried to go for the other’s waist.

Fill my heart with song

And let me sing forevermore

You are all I long for

All I worship and adore

Jesse had a mildly panicked look on her face when Emily rested her hand on her shoulder. “I can’t dance for shit—”

“Follow my lead, two and two.” Emily took the lead.

In other words, please be true

In other words, I love you

An expansive brass section joined the bass and drums for a solo, and Emily swayed with Jesse on her heels, mouthing one-two to the beat and changing the direction of the movement. Jesse was very off-key and staggering behind, until Polaris started pulsing in her view to help with the tempo.

When the brass calmed down they were at a more comfortable pace, and Jesse could pay less attention to moving and more to feeling the moment. She relaxed all those stiff muscles and let Emily lead her, not looking at the floor but at her, all warmth and awe.

“So, do you still think Sinatra is lame?” Emily teased.

“I didn’t, that was the other Jesse.” Jesse waited a second, smirking. “I thought it was grandma music.”

Emily laughed.

Fill my heart with song

Let me sing forevermore

You are all I long for

All I worship and adore

In other words, please be true

In a daring display, Jesse tried to spin Emily on her axis and she took that opportunity to completely accidentally land with her back to Jesse, in her arms.

In other words

In other words

All the hairs stood on end when she felt Jesse’s surprised exhale on her ear, and how she immediately held her breath afterwards. It would be so easy to just turn her face now and kiss her…

I love

you

The song ended with quirky piano notes, and another one began afterwards. Their only movement was Jesse raising a slow, hesitant hand to Emily’s cheek and caressing it. It sent static through Emily’s skin, a sweet warmth she leaned into, now hyperaware and longing for the touch. An irrational reaction, but a welcome one. Did Jesse know she could play her like a fiddle now if she wanted? That Emily wanted it?

Jesse slid her hand to the back of her head and ran her fingers up Emily’s hair. Emily closed her eyes and sighed, content, melting against her chest.

Then Jesse hesitated, and Emily turned to face her, curious, a little drunk on affection too - and Jesse’s eyes were locked on hers, impossibly bright, smoldering, but also so afraid to mess things up again.

Emily had told herself she’d let things play out a little longer, that she wanted more signs from Jesse, more safeguards, a true understanding on her part. She rolled along with her plans for as long as she could, but she also realized her own feelings were the true masters of this matter. Now, looking at Jesse, Emily didn’t feel anything hurt in the back of her heart, just a raging need to welcome the fire.

There was a passing thought that much like a forest fire, she wouldn’t be able to control this once it started.

Good , she whispered mentally to herself, and leaned in.

—

Chapter Text

The world was red and it pulsed in waves, in thunder and words. It made all things wrong, recurving in and out of themselves, unbound by gravity. It lit people up by the insides like pretty red lanterns it could launch to the skies, ready to blow. It made him crazy with the sound, ever present, terrifying, so, so good to say. He didn't want to say it anymore, but sometimes he caught himself doing it - for a minute, for  hours, he didn't really know - not that time meant anything anymore. 

He walked.

He could never stay in one place. Sooner or later he was launched through space like a dart and landed somewhere else. Sometimes there were shadows, echoes of sentience passing by too fast, too twisted. Worms, stretched. Blink and they're gone. Sometimes he was on the familiar streets of the town of his memory, now a broken reminder of the gift his sister gave him. Other times he was in the House, always inside the dreams of those trapped in red; there was a chance he ended up in the city, too, where the echoes of people cheered, destined to the fall, where the moon smiled like spider webs and the buildings had roots so deep they reached into the darkness. Sometimes he was only in endless red, and sometimes he didn't know where he was.

He watched as a version of his childhood school bulged like a tumor, thrumming like a beating heart, only to go back to its original state. The street was like flesh under his bare feet. Or snow. Smoke. It was wrong, so he couldn't really tell. Did he ever know what "right" was supposed to be?

He walked. Happiness comes.

A part of his brain wanted him to acknowledge the confusion, to make him stop and process the fact the red was all his fault, he was the one who drove safe haven away, and now he had to find a way out - except there wasn't one. He was a desperate asshole who couldn't keep his jealousy in check. His fate served him right.

He missed his sister. Did she miss him too?

It always hurt when he thought about her. His days had been good when they were together. Even when he felt bad she was always there to help, play, to have fun and laugh and cry with him. She built a town - their town - so he could be safe. They watched movies together, threw each other in the lake, traded stickers from packs they found in the thrift store, had mudball fights...  He missed her. 

Why did she have to go and bring her girlfriend along? She couldn't just betray him like that. 

He wished she would come back. He told her not to, of course, but he was just a pathetic, scared, broken idiot who didn't know what he was talking about. He didn't want to be forgotten. Not by her...

He walked the landscape of broken roots and festive flags. The impressions of people cheered with distorted voices all around him - you want to dream, you want to hurt, you want to smile - heading to the chasm, like he knew they would. They didn't know, despite the signs. Why didn't anyone notice the thing in the dark? 

They fell. Did he fall with them?

Something happened, beyond the darkness. A single point of light appeared, silvery, bluish, familiar. He raised a hand towards it and it started growing, albeit still too far. He wanted to reach it; it wasn't darkness and it wasn't sound. What was it? He had the sense he knew, but his mind was too scattered to name it.

The light pulsed, and it washed the darkness away like water over paint. He was back at his broken town, he was someone. Dylan? His name was Dylan. The city was all red, but his mind felt clearer, somehow. 

One more pulse and the red around the distant light faded in iridescent smoke, a portion of the town now back to its original colors. Dylan gaped at that, rooted to his spot. Nothing had been able to disperse the Hiss like that. It was too quick, too voracious. Nothing, except…

His chest tightened when he realized the light was the familiar glint of Polaris. He hated her so much but he also missed her, and in this situation seeing her there was like being in a shipwreck and seeing a lifeboat. He needed to get to her. He needed to make his feet move.

The third pulse was the strongest, eradicating the viral resonance up until halfway to Dylan. He choked a little, and tumbled on his own feet when he finally started running. If Polaris was there, he could contact Jesse. 

He barely got to feel the reality without the oppressive weight of the Hiss when Polaris' light disappeared, and the place was once again flooded with red resonance. It hurt his eyes, and the sound made his ears bleed - his time had just ran out.

Dylan let himself fall on his knees, eyes fixed on the point where the light had been concentrated. He couldn't fight the Hiss, he wasn't strong enough. Never good enough. 

He wanted to go home, but he didn't have one.

—

"The broadcast has been running for thirty-two hours with no incidents, ma'am. The resonance expands further down the sector with every loop, and the floating staff have been descending slowly, at an average of three point two inches per ten minutes…"

The scientist, a Dr. Ramos, was briefing Jesse on the changes from the first iteration of the experiment and the results they've been achieving. Unfortunately her attention kept drifting away that morning - Dr. Ramos kept going on about statistics and delicate measurements, and all Jesse could think about was how Emily's kisses felt on her neck, how soft her skin was, the sound of her laughter...

"...so I'd say the prospects are very good, ma'am." Dr. Ramos bounced on her feet, holding tight his clipboard and staring at her like he wanted a golden star. Jesse couldn't just tell him to explain it all over again because she dozed off; it would be very disrespectful and probably break his heart.

"Brilliant work from all of you" She patted his shoulder, smiling a bit awkwardly. He stood straighter, proudly. "This is very good news."

"We'll let you know if any of the floating staff displays a change in their readings," Dr. Saba added from his spot, looking briefly at Jesse before going back to typing on his clunky, ancient computer.

"I appreciate it, thanks." She nodded.  

The doors to the Mail control room opened on the floor above, and Emily came out of it discussing something with Dr. Bronte. Jesse was always at least marginally aware of what happened in her peripheral vision - a skill she got from years on the run and on the streets - and she turned to take a better look almost instinctively. She loved how comfortable Emily was in her role, she was made for it: there was a regalness to her posture, an assertiveness to her gestures, even the frown out of concentration while she listened to her colleague was the mark of someone who knew what she was doing. What a woman.

"Is there anything wrong, Miss Faden?" Dr. Ramos asked innocently, looking in the same direction she was.

Jesse blinked, suddenly back from her reverie. "No, I was just thinking I have to talk to Emily. About expanding the HRA network." She massaged her bad shoulder. "I should go now. Thanks for the report!" 

She headed to the nearest staircase with haste, hoping to catch Emily still on the upper floor, before the researchers could get to her with the mountain of work that undoubtedly needed her approval. Jesse could still hear Dr. Saba commenting in hushed whispers as she distanced herself: The network, right… 

It was amazing how people thought Jesse and Emily went around the corners of the House making out like two horny teenagers when they did nothing of the sort so far. Well… excluding the night before, of course. She'd like to think that wherever Trench was, he was mortified with his office being used for such activities; his supposed misery was enough to put Jesse in a good mood.

Not that I think he even remembered how to not be in misery, from what he sounds like, but still.

"Oh— Hi Jesse!"

She'd just turned around the staircase when Emily and Dr. Bronte appeared at the end of it. Hearing Emily's voice was an instant source of serotonin, and Jesse had to consciously stop herself from using her powers to dash up the steps and take her in her arms, lower her like in an old movie and kiss her. 

"Emily! Just who I wanted to see." Jesse settled for a small smile that she was sure looked awkward, but this wasn't really a problem when people knew she was a little wonky with emoting.

"Really?" Emily tilted her head slightly, and Jesse caught the glimmer of joy in her eyes before she kept it in check. "And what would it be about?"

"I'll leave you to it." Dr. Bronte said, looking from one to the other, raising her eyebrows. "Emily, Miss Faden…"

She nodded in acknowledgement and started descending the steps. Jesse nodded back. "You can call me Jesse, Dr. Bronte."

"Ah, right! I keep forgetting!" She stopped for a moment. "And you can call me Paula."

"You got me, I also forgot that." Jesse let out a soft chuckle. "Next time then."

"It's a deal." 

Jesse watched until Paula disappeared from view on the lower floor and turned her attention back to Emily. She didn't hold back this time: not her lovestruck expression, not the dashing up the—

"No! Don't do it!" Emily half warned, half chuckled. "There are people with delicate materials here, you could knock something over."

Which really meant there were people that would see them being affectionate if Jesse decided to pounce on Emily like that, and they didn't discuss how and if they'd let their affair become public yet.

Jesse grunted and put her hands on her pockets. Emily had a fair point, as always, but that didn't mean she had to like it.

"Aw, don't pout." Emily came down the stairs towards her, lowering her clipboard.

"I'm not—" only then Jesse noticed she was really doing it, so she stopped and blushed, even grumpier. "Anyway—"

Emily got to her and swiftly pulled her in by the collar for a quick peck. It caught her off guard, and her surprised yelp and her super giddy expression afterwards made Emily giggle. "So, what do you want to talk about?"

Jesse blinked, trying to remember what words were. "Us doing this. Again."

"Not here." Emily straightened her collar with an amused little smile. "Too many people."

Jesse hated that she was right, and even more that she got away with kissing her first. It should’ve been her idea! "So let's go take a walk, what do you say?"

"Of course, after I check the progress with the rest of the team and take a peek at the HRA lab.”

“You’re way too busy for my liking.” Jesse crossed her arms, but it was mostly drama on her part.

“So are you, but we both know you're avoiding the bureaucrats like the plague.” Emily snickered. 

"Can you blame me? They keep insisting on having me sign their papers when we still have to deal with the Hiss problem!" Jesse scoffed. "Like they could solve it with an eviction note…"

"I agree with you, but an outside point of restraint is always a good thing when it comes to power, and there's merit in documenting and creating rules for specific situations."

"That's why I got you and Arish, you'll hit me in the head with clipboards if I go out of the line. And I highly doubt a permit for wearing clothes outside of the standard office wear is so important I have to personally authorize it right now."

"A fair point, I concede. And I heard you were running from Langston as well?" 

Jesse shuddered. "He wants to tell me about his theremin poetry." 

There was a moment of loaded silence, then Emily burst out laughing so hard she had to lean on Jesse not to lose her balance. "Wow. Just… wow."

"I assure you, it's as bad as it sounds." 

"You're making me curious..."

"Then by all means ask him about it, but I tried to warn you." Jesse made a dramatic motion to turn and head down the stairs, but she thought better of it. "Are you sure you don't want to go to the post-it room to perform some research with me for twenty minutes?"

Emily laughed and patted her arm, all smiles. "Go kill some Hiss, Jesse. We'll talk later." 

She didn't want to talk later. She wanted to sit somewhere with Emily and kiss her until they both needed a cold shower, like they did the night before. She wanted to lay down with her head on her lap, feeling her fingers threading through her hair, talking about silly things. She wanted a reprise, but she knew it wouldn't be feasible in the middle of the day like that. Jesse craved her presence, touch and attention very strongly now that she had a taste of it, a classic case of her buried needs and hopes waking up now that she had a semblance of stability. It worried her a little; would she get too clingy, take things too fast, be too incisive? She didn't know all that much about relationships, and she didn't want to mess things up. Communication, right? It was all a matter of communication. She could talk to Emily about it later, she supposed. Now she had things to do, big responsibilities and people relying on her, and focusing on other things would make time go by faster so she could see her later.

It's okay. She's going to do amazing science and save everyone. It's just a couple of hours, I can wait.

Polaris sparkled faintly in her vision, offering a little solace and encouragement with her presence. Jesse's lips curled in a tired smile and she placed a hand on her bad shoulder.

Of course, you're always a great support. I just wish you had arms to hug me sometimes.

The way Polaris expanded and then returned to her usual size slowly felt like a long sigh to Jesse. Apparently she too was bummed about it.

—

"So you see, if everything goes according to plan, we'll have enough emitters to install at every sector's lobby by the end of the week."

Jesse sat on a chair by Dylan's bed and devoured a pack of nondescript peanuts she had levitated out of a vending machine. She was in the middle of her daily ritual of telling him the relevant events of the day — usually the news, the gossip and her thoughts on whatever she wanted to share. He didn't answer, of course, but that didn't disencourage her.

"We'll turn them on and see how far they spread the resonance field. If we're lucky they'll go far and we won't have to make a lot more to cover the whole House!" Her tone was bright, she almost threw a bunch of peanuts up as she gesticulated. "Can you imagine? We'd finally be rid of the Hiss!"

Someone knocked lightly on the glass of the cell. Jesse turned to the sound and saw Arish with a clipboard and an apologetic look. "Hey, Faden! You got one sec?" He pointed at the clipboard.

Jesse raised an eyebrow. If he sought her out there, it must be important. It even got her to sit straight on the chair. "Come in!"

Arish's eyes darted to Dylan and back, and his brow creased into badly-disguised concern. He still came in, clearly uncomfortable as he stepped on the metal floor of the cell. "Sorry to bother you, but I need to know if you found any sniper ammo in your latest incursions in the House. I'm taking inventory and we’re running dangerously low now, I wanted to know how soon I'll need to send a team to search for it."

Oh yes, that! Arish did ask her to keep an eye open when they talked in the morning. "I didn't see any, sorry… but I can go search when I finish here."

His brow creased even further. "Are you sure? I know you have a lot of things to do…"

"It just so happens I'm running from some of those things and this is a perfect excuse." She laughed. "Ugh, so many documents to read…"

Arish grimaced. "Yeah, good luck with those…"

The conversation died down and for a moment they stood in silence, not knowing how to go from there. 

"How is he?" Arish asked, a soft whisper like he feared touching the subject.

Jesse wasn't expecting the question, so her eyes widened and her words didn't quite catch up with her mouth at first. " Uh… Well. The same. Why do you ask?"

He massaged the back of his head, looking like he wasn't sure if he should talk. Then he let out some air. "Because it's sad, you know. Fuck, you were searching for him for most of your life, weren't you? And he was here, under our noses, and we never suspected. It's horrifying." He pursed his lips in distaste. "Fucking unfair."

Seeing Arish's indignation brought Jesse a sense of gratitude towards him. She still had to remind herself sometimes that most of the people in the Bureau didn't dream about the existence of a captive child inside their workplace, and seeing confirmation of that - in the form of an horrified Arish - was the reassurance she needed. Those people deserved saving, and she was in control of the FBC now. She'd make sure something like what happened to her brother never happened again.

"The world isn't fair, true, but at least I'm here with him now, and he's safe." Jesse forced a small smile. "I can wait for him."

Jesse looked at Dylan, his chest raising and lowering evenly as he breathed. He looked peaceful like that.

"That wasn't your fault," Arish said as he approached, "and neither of you should've suffered like that."

"Yeah, but it happened." Jesse’s smile turned sad. "Thank you for the words, though. It means a lot."

"Just some basic decency, boss!" Arish chuckled, but he was still embarrassed with the situation. "I'm sure he'll wake up and you'll make up for the lost time. Did you two bicker a lot when you were younger?"

"Not really. He was kind, quiet. I'd drag him along to all sorts of trouble and we'd pretend we were two famous explorers, or knights of rival kingdoms, or maybe giant monsters… we were inseparable." Finally a genuine smile curved her lips up, the memories warming her heart. "Of course, sometimes I stole his toy soldiers, we fought for the last cookies, there were claims of parental unfairness, normal sibling stuff."

"Oh yeah, accusing your parents of playing favorites, a classic." Arish chuckled. "I always complained my sister got more TV time than me, but that was definitely because she was better at school. Sometimes my parents listened, though." He grinned like it was a good memory.

"I didn't know you had a sister." 

"Two, in fact! Both older than me." He smiled, good-natured as he always was. "It's a pain in the ass, but I love them."

Seeing the spark in his eyes as he talked about his sisters made Jesse bittersweet about the situation. On one hand, it was nice to see him happy like that; on the other, it hurt her a little, because she wanted to have a similar relationship with Dylan.

"We have to get out of here soon, so you can go visit them." Jesse stretched her arms and got up. 

"Fuck, yeah. It's been ages…" Arish’s eyes were distant for a moment, reaching far, where his sisters were. "What are you doing when we get out? I think I never asked."

"Ah. I guess I'll stay behind with a small group and monitor the situation. We have to ensure no Hiss will reappear from the depths of hell and try to get out."

"Sure, and after that? You mentioned you came from out of the city, do you have a place to stay?"

"Yeah, uh, Emily offered me her place for a couple of days until I figure things out…" Jesse hoped Arish wouldn't notice if she was blushing a little. It was just that admitting that she was invited to stay at Emily's apartment had a whole new layer for her, now that they were together.

Arish nodded, seemingly unaware. "Fair enough. I'd offer mine too, but I wouldn't want it to sound creepy, you know, because I'm a guy."

"You're a good person, Arish. Thank you anyway." 

"It's a pleasure."

"Well, now to look for a lost armory and all the sniper ammo I can get." Jesse rolled her shoulders back and the right one popped, making her wince for a second - but it was back and normal right after. 

"Anything else you want to know about the place? It was connected to the Atlas Chamber in Maintenance, uh, it had a guy, a creepy guy by the way - I think his name was Jeffrey - who handled things…"

"I don't think that will help, to be honest, but thanks anyway."

They exited the room together and headed to the stairs. There were two men near it, chatting and leaning on the balustrade, and as Jesse passed by she could hear their conversation, as it always seemed to happen around Central Executive (did the House have anything to do with it?) she usually filtered it out, though. It wouldn't have piqued her interest if she hadn't heard a very specific, very bombastic sentence:

"The Director and Dr. Pope are fucking!" One of the men declared quite loudly, hitting the top of the balustrade for emphasis.

Both Jesse and Arish stopped on their tracks behind them, wide-eyed, looking at each other to make sure they had heard it right.

The other man was also surprised to hear it — he almost spit his coffee. "What?! How— Did someone catch them red-handed?!"

Jesse was getting more flustered by the second, thinking that someone must have seen or heard something. Even if she hadn’t slept with Emily, they definitely shouldn't have been together like that , especially in the Director's Office. The last thing she needed now was to have to deal with this sort of gossip…

The man who brought up the claim continued, unaware of the people behind him. "Nah, but look, they are fucking, I know it!"

The other one let go of the breath he didn't realize he was holding, and rolled his eyes. Behind him, Jesse did something similar. "Oh fuck off, Benny! I thought it was serious…"

"Just hear me out!" Benny tried, "They keep disappearing every day after their shifts, they always teleport somewhere together... Isn't it suspicious?"

Arish looked at Jesse like he couldn't believe the gall of that guy, and Jesse shrugged. 

"No? They can do whatever they want in their off-hours, and they work so much I bet they're taking care of some project. Besides, Pope's too much of a goody-two-shoes for that."

Jesse raised an eyebrow. Goody-two-shoes? She could see how Emily could give off that vibe,

Benny scoffed. "Do you really believe that, John? You can't tell me you don't see the way they look at each other. They're fucking, I tell you."

Jesse had to concede, he had a point about the looks. It wasn't like she could control her reaction when she saw such a goddess coming by. She couldn't be blamed for being in love!

John frowned, stopped and took a moment to sip his coffee, all in very deliberate motions. When he spoke again, he was the voice of skepticism. "Yeah, sure - and what if they were fucking? What does it matter? As long as they're getting us out of here I'm happy."

"Yeah, I mean - I agree! It's different from this shitstorm, that's all." Benny deflated a little with that reaction. He was probably the type of person who thrived with baseless gossip. "Do you think HR would allow it?"

"I don't know, but they're the big bosses, they'd change the rules so it doesn’t matter anyway."

That was actually a good idea. Jesse had a sense Emily would be against it, though.

"That would be the icing on the cake for those researchers who hate the doctor, huh?" The mischievous tone came back to Benny's voice and he poked John with his elbow. "I heard that guy she sent to the Pit to work with that British mushroom lady is really harboring a grudge."

"I guess I would too if I was sent there," John shivered - it looked like Underhill's reputation reached far. "but he deserved it."

"Yeah, big asshole. Anyone can see how much Dr. Pope is working to end the Hiss, but he has to be the special snowflake who knows she's bad."

John nodded lazily, more focused on his mug. "I hope this HRA network they're testing works. I want to go home and sleep for a week straight."

"That would be so good, wouldn't it?" Benny let out a dreamy sigh. "I wonder if we'll earn some time off when we get out of here. God knows we need at least a month after this carnage…"

Jesse saw an opportunity and cleared her throat. "I don't know if a month is doable, but we'll see what we can do."

Both the men turned like lightning and froze upon seeing their Director there, especially Benny. Jesse had to suppress the laughter, but luckily she was very good with the neutral-but-slightly-threatening face. It was her standard, really.

"D-director Faden, hi!" Benny stuttered, "have you been there long?"

Jesse opened a small, cryptic smile. "Maybe."

Benny got pale as a ghost all of a sudden.

Arish cleared his throat, hiding his poorly contained giggling with a hand. "Anyway, Faden, I have to go back to my post…"

"Of course" Jesse turned to him, and she was glad for the opening he gave her: a great way to sow chaos and abscond like none was the wiser. "I'd better come with you. Enjoy your break, folks." She nodded towards the two men and followed Arish downstairs, both keeping a dignified facade until they were out of view and in front of the checkpoint leading to the Jukebox room. There they looked at each other and burst into laughter.

"Did you see his face?! He was about to faint, I swear!" Jesse wiped a tear forming out of laughter.

"He'll probably need a change of pants!" Arish leaned on the wall, so he wouldn't lose balance. "This was too good!"

"I hope he stops saying Emily and I are fucking," Jesse crossed her arms, "as if we had time for that!"

Arish gave her a curious, sly look. "Yeah, right… But in the case you were, say, thinking of doing it, you wouldn't be stupid enough to be seen heading somewhere together, right?" 

Jesse frowned, not understanding what he was suggesting at first. Then she felt her cheeks burning and immediately tried to hide her face from him. "I gotta go now, yeah, I've fooled around long enough, bye Arish!"

She all but ran towards the control point, too embarrassed to think, and teleported to the first place that came to mind: the Maintenance Sector, near Ahti's office. She stepped out of the Control Point, leaned her back on the wall and sighed, combing her hair back with her fingers.

Do you think he knows?, she asked in her mind.

There was no answer from Polaris, but Jesse was starting to put her thoughts straight after a couple of seconds. The way he talked, Arish didn't really care about her love life, he was only poking some fun and giving her advice at the same time. If anything, he'd be happy to know they were actually taking some time off. He was nice just like that.

Jesse shook her head, smiling as she thought about his words. She knew better than to let people see her and Emily, true. She was also a fool, and if Emily played her cards right, even if unknowingly, it was very easy to deactivate her one brain cell and leave them possibly exposed. Jesse was sure Emily could handle the secrecy of their relationship way better than she would ever be able to, so she'd raise the topic when they had a moment. If they wanted to keep it secret, that is. 

—

A trash can hit a Hiss guard right in the face, throwing him sideways and onto two other guards, the three falling in a pile. Jesse called a desk lamp to her and quickly threw it towards a Hiss orb, but it immediately blinked away. She cursed under her breath, but the thing was hit by a hail of bullets fired by some of the rangers accompanying her in that incursion. It wasn't enough to disperse the orb, but it was a good start.

They were in the Prime Candidate Program corridors after slaying a ton of Hiss in the entrance hall to the Panopticon. Now that Jesse knew it was a matter of time before they regenerated enough to come back and try to get her again, fighting them became more an ingrate chore than ever. The only reason it wasn't completely pointless was the fact it bought them time - time enough to activate more emitters, for example, or devise a way to entrap and drag the Hiss to the control points so they could be properly purged.

A couple of Hiss charged - blasted bomb people! - screeched and dragged their limbs floating towards the rangers, but Jesse intercepted them midway with a shot of the service weapon, Pierce mod. The thing was so powerful it lodged itself in a metal cabinet near the end of the twisted, corkscrewing corridor.

The Hiss exploded, naturally, leaving a cloud of dust, resonance and flying papers. The orb zapped by them, and the rangers tried to shoot it again, but it was far too quick for their reflexes. Luckily Jesse was sharper than then, and as soon as it stopped in one corner, a metal drawer hit it dead center and it disappeared in a flash of red light.

One of the rangers cheered, and the other two surveyed the area in search of unseen threats. Jesse knew better, though; she didn't feel the hostile resonance bearing down on them anymore.

"They're gone for now," she said, dropping the Service Weapon. It flipped forward and disappeared in thin air. "Keep a perimeter, yes? I'm going to take a look at something."

Jesse hadn’t planned on going to the Prime Candidate Program, but the door with the big P6 written over it was looking at her from the other side of the place, ominous and enticing like a siren's call. She'd been there a couple of times after the Slide Projector was shut down, to look at the files more thoroughly, and every time it broke her. The records of what those people did to her brother were plenty, all of them cataloged and filled there with their perfect little reports and reasonings, like it would exempt them from their terrible deeds because they meant well. Jesse opened the double doors and squeezed her eyes for a second, scanning the room. Everything was as she left it — in disarray, but not destroyed yet. The only reason the room still stood was because they needed all the info they could get to try and bring Dylan back from the coma, and learn if the Bureau did something they'd have to undo eventually. So far Jesse hadn’t found anything of the sort, but it didn't mean reading those files was an okay experience; not in the slightest.

She didn't know exactly why she was there this time. Was she trying to punish herself? What could she possibly get from that place that she didn't know yet, but more children abuse tactics from professionals that should know better? She ran a hand over the side of the binders filled away in one cabinet, idly. She picked one up at random and opened it: apparently, it was an activity log for Dylan in his cell, dated a couple of years before. She put it back without looking at the contents.

This is hopeless, she went to the other side of the room and crouched, opening a filing drawer. There were few files there, she took most of them to the board room already. Maybe she'd have more luck with these.

The folder she opened contained a file on Dylan's raw parautility levels and had graphs showing the increase over the years. His power was amazing, and Jesse smirked seeing how impressed the scientist writing the report was with it. That was her brother, always defying expectations.

The smile disappeared when she got to the recommendations part of the file, though. It labeled Dylan volatile, unstable, and unable to control his powers when in emotional turmoil. It recommended making regular tests with specific incantations to ensure he didn't bind any OOP to himself and that nothing in his space became altered; it suggested black rock-infused glass for his cell so he wouldn't be able to influence anything outside it, and the list went on. As always, they could only see a danger to the Bureau, not a traumatized person in need of help. 

She put the folder back and closed the drawer. Nothing she found here would change the fact Dylan wanted to be alone now and that she couldn't help him. She wondered if he'd ever change his mind, and if she'd know it. Maybe she should try getting the Report and trying to find him again. She wouldn't bother him, she just needed to know…

Polaris spun sharply into view, a tone she used when she wanted Jesse to halt. She showed her an image of her on the stretcher beside Dylan, and the concern on the faces of the researchers crowded around them. Emily driving herself to exhaustion trying to find a way to bring her back, the fear in everyone's eyes. It was as if Polaris said, they need you.

Jesse knew that. It just hurt so much, sometimes… She needed her brother. She needed to know he was safe.

She should've been the one the Bureau captured in the first place.

She had always been the defiant, forceful weirdo. Dylan was a sweet boy, he would've fit in well with the world. Did any of them have a place out there, now? Dylan would be a stranger to everything, the world he knew before the bureau was dead and long gone, and Jesse… she changed. She made friends with plants and empty astronaut suits, she walked through the liminals of reality. Would the outside world have any charm left, now that she'd not only seen, but gone through the hole in the wall? How could she convince Dylan there were good things out there for him, if she was so fascinated by the things inside?

Jesse shook her head. She was tired and this place, these files… they never did her good. She just wanted to grab her brother and take him out of the Oldest House to a place he could be happy in, to show him all these little places she saw these years and that made her think of him. It shouldn't be this difficult. 

Several hours later, Emily arrived in the Board Room, drained but satisfied with the day's work, and she caught Jesse very absorbed in writing on a notepad. It was unusual to say the least - she didn't even notice the arrival, and it got Emily extremely curious. 

"What are you writing about?" She pulled a chair next to Jesse and groaned in relief from finally sitting down. 

"The places I want to take Dylan to," Jesse mumbled, finishing what she was writing and only then looking at Emily. "Hey."

"Hey yourself. Rough day?" Emily placed a hand on her arm.

"The usual. I ended up going to the Prime Candidate Program, though, and that place reminds me of everything wrong here." Emily was about to open her mouth to say something when Jesse decided to keep going. "So I decided to do this. You always say it's good to put things on paper, right? So we won't forget. And it's nice to think about it."

Jesse went back to looking at her list, but she felt Emily's eyes on her and she felt foolish. It was probably very obvious how shaken she still was, but she couldn't just crumble right now. 

"What did you put on the list?" Emily asked, apparently unbothered.

"Well, I have to take him somewhere to eat, who knows what sort of food they were giving him. We definitely have to stuff our faces with ice cream, too, and then spend a day in a park. You know, walk on grass, get some sun, all those things that are becoming only a myth for us while we're stuck here." Jesse smiled sadly. "Then go watch a movie, any movie."

"Both of you could use some new clothes, too," Emily suggested.

Jesse furrowed her brow for a second, but then nodded. "You're right, I'll add it."

"I know some pretty nice places. We could go together before taking Dylan there, so you know what to expect - and I’d get to dress you up all for myself."

Jesse turned to face Emily so quickly her hair even fluttered in the air behind her. When she saw Emily with her chin on her hand and a sly smile, clearly appraising her, she blushed instantly. "W-what?"

"What? Can't a girl dream of seeing her girlfriend in expensive clothing?" Emily chuckled. "Don't worry, though. We're only getting pieces you like."

"Uh… okay?" Jesse blinked. There was a certain thrill about hearing Emily call her girlfriend, like it confirmed Jesse wasn't just dreaming about it. She couldn't help but smile a little. "Let's see… Do you think he'd like to go to the Natural History Museum? He used to like dinosaurs."

"I'm a little biased but yes, definitely! If anything, you can always ask him and take it off the list afterwards. You could go to Broadway, too - maybe you'll like the musicals."

"Maybe…" Jesse put it on the paper. “Do you?”

“Some, yes. But that’s not about me.”

Jesse made an addendum to the entry anyway. She wouldn't miss an opportunity to take Emily somewhere nice once they were out of the lockdown, and the same could be said for Dylan. She hoped they appreciated it when the time came.

She stared at the paper, at the dozen things she came up with, and she felt exposed and insecure. She fantasized about sharing those moments with Dylan for a long time, they helped her through darkness and despair. Even then, were they foolish? "Do you think he'd like to go out with me and do all of this?"

Emily placed a hand over hers. "Of course, Jesse. It might take a while but he loves you, he'll want to spend time with you."

Jesse pursed her lips, her stare miles and miles away. "But not with Polaris around. He's too hurt, and I don’t blame him."

Emily held her hand tight. "You're hurt, too. Give him some time, maybe he'll see his hatred of Polaris doesn't surpass his love of you."

Jesse nodded, silent. She wouldn't argue with Emily when she was trying to help, but it was unlikely; He did let a viral, antagonist resonance take him just so he could destroy Polaris, after all. And the wait… it was like a hook tugging at her heart and tearing it open inch by inch, constantly. She could do it; she’d waited for 17 years already. It would be blood gushing everywhere, though.

—

The next days were a blur of producing and installing the emitters throughout the lower part of Central Research, setting up equipment, securing the place from increasing Hiss attacks (were they attracted to the group of people coming and going?) and searching the Oldest House for supplies of all sorts, especially ammunition, so the rangers guarding the site would be properly equipped.

It was rough. People had been locked inside the building for too long, were under too much stress. Everyone was exhausted, carrying on largely by their training, hope and routine. Jesse and Emily barely had a moment for themselves, and when they did, they often ended up falling asleep very quickly in each other's arms.

They didn't often sleep together, though, so as to not cause wilder rumors to appear and take people's focus away from things that mattered. Jesse was a little skeptical: She thought it didn't matter what they did and gossip would fly regardless, but she respected Emily's wishes on the matter - Emily knew about office drama way better than her, after all.

The second instance of the Hedron Emitter Network yielded amazing results, much like the first. It locked Central Research in a resonance loop that had a steady increase in its field of action until it covered virtually the whole area. The floating staff lowered and stopped chanting, but didn't show any sign of waking up or fading away, much like Dylan. No Hiss appeared to disturb the place, and the live specimens the rangers managed to capture and bring inside evaporated in mist much like the one they tested it on in Maintenance.

The fact the resonance was strong enough to cause such damage on the Hiss meant they couldn't get close enough to attack the researchers or the equipment once the system was working, but that only meant it intensified the attacks at the edges of the resonance field during the following days, usually when the team was installing new emitters to expand the coverage. At first the rangers on site were enough to suppress the threat, and they expanded the field all the way to Parakinesiology. After that, though, it was as like the first day of the invasion all over again: the Hiss came from everywhere, in big numbers, and the Rangers thought they were done for.

Just like the first day, they were wrong on that assumption: The Director came out of nowhere like a tornado of floating debris and bullets, and saved them once more. The Bureau sends me alerts , she justified afterwards, shrugging like it was no big deal, like instant messages, but in my brain.

Come to think of it, Jesse's mind really was like a paranatural cellphone, and a popular one at it: the Board called her to talk about work, the Former was like the conspiratorial coworker calling with the inside gossip, Trench was the annoying person who still left voicemail in this day and age, Marshall had no choice but to do the same. Darling called from a weird trippy concert with unexpected wisdom - you could bet money he was high as hell as he did - and Alan Wake was some desperate guy asking for help to any number he could contact, but was cut short and didn't have time to give the vital information on how to find him. That wasn't even talking about Jesse's friend/family/mindfulness app/gps, Polaris…

Jesse chuckled with herself thinking about it, shook her head and took a swig from her cup of water. 

She was in the Ritual Division now. The rangers were running a big guard operation, protecting people as they worked on setting up whatever they needed for the Hedron Resonance Emitter Network. Jesse made the rounds with the rangers, claiming this was too important for her to delegate. While this was undeniably true, people knew there was an added layer of interest on her part because Emily was there; Subtlety wasn't her strong suit.

"Hey Director, ma'am, can you pass me the blue cables?" One of the scientists asked from the top of his stairs, looking at Jesse expectantly.

"Oh, right. These?"

He nodded and she floated them towards him, no effort necessary.

"Thank you! This sure is a handy parautility, huh!"

"Definitely." Jesse’s mind went straight to the heavy lifting she usually did looking for supplies. It was an astronomical improvement from her times unloading trucks for a couple of bucks.

People were running everywhere, almost every survivor able to work was there helping on one thing or another to speed up the installation. She threw the cup in the bin and walked towards the woman with the clipboard giving instructions in the middle of the room: her beautiful, competent, brilliant girlfriend. 

"Hey Emily, how are we doing?" Jesse stopped beside Emily and took a peek at her clipboard - there was definitely a list, but she didn't know what any of the items were.

"Right on track, but there might be less heavy duty wiring than previously anticipated. We won’t run out immediately, but it might be a problem when we start the next room. I already ordered a study on how we can reuse the wiring from older projects."

Jesse put her hands on her pockets. "You always think of everything, don't you?"

"Well, it's my job!" Emily chuckled.

Jesse wouldn't argue with that. "Have you eaten lately? Hydrated?"

"I'm fine, thanks." Emily went back to writing on her clipboard.

"Need anything else?"

"Nothing you can give me right now, no."

"Huh."

Emily spoke with such a straight face it took Jesse a moment to realize the suggestion in her little smirk. Not right now, no, but maybe later.

Jesse cleared her throat to try and hide her obvious grin. "So, uh… how many emitters do we still have to install…?"

"A lot. You see, we didn't even get to the center of the room yet—"

It all happened too fast: The lamps flickered red, a deep noise rattled their insides, the Hiss was upon them by the dozens. Jesse barely had time to get Emily out of the way of a hail of bullets from a hiss guard before a chunk of concrete came flying in their direction, thrown by an elevated. Were her evasion abilities any less supernatural, they wouldn't have made it to the entrance of the nearest shelter department in one piece (the carousel horse was really a friend for life).

"Don't get out until I come back!" Jesse fended off a couple of hiss guards as the door opened for them.

"Got it. Good luck, Jesse." Emily placed a hand on her shoulder and they exchanged one quick look before Emily ran inside the shelter, followed by two other panicked researchers. A ranger approached bringing more people to safety and Jesse saw this as her cue to go back to the fray, her mind already in battle mode. 

Dispatch them quickly and they won't have time to hurt anyone.

Polaris blinked in agreement.

The fight was ugly. The Hiss' numbers only increased, so much that it reminded Jesse of the assault on the astral plane. The projector wasn't in use again, though, or Polaris would've warned her. No, these were all the Hiss already inside and regenerated, and she didn't even know if it was a small or big portion of the infected. 

The rangers were organized and well positioned, but the sheer volume of enemies made it incredibly difficult to manage the situation. They were overwhelmed even with Jesse - the one-woman-army director! - by their side. 

Jesse gave her all in the fight. She shot and punched and blasted and launched, she took the minds of some of the Hiss to fight by her side, she shielded her allies and dashed to take them out of harm's way when she could. Her mind was running on instinct and one directive: the Hiss were desperate. She couldn't let them prevail. All the researchers and rangers there depended on her.

At one point she had to lure a massive group of hiss charged away from the rangers so she could shoot and cause a massive explosion on a part of the hall where no one would get hurt. The iridescent smoke that they bodies dissipated into was so dense for a second she raised a debris shield just in case she was attacked and couldn't see what was going on.

The mist dissipated and she had barely dropped it when she felt the floor move under her feet and she was propelled up with the rapidly rising concrete. 

It stopped abruptly and threw Jesse to the air. She hit the floor with her side and slipped out of the platform, flailing about for a second, trying to find anything to cling to. She couldn't hold on and fell again, only then realizing how high up she was. Thankfully she had the powers of the bennicoff tv with her for a while, and halted her fall the same way a diver stays in place in the vast ocean. With a diver's calm and her instincts flaring up, she looked around and found the Ritual Division twisting its insides out, spilling concrete tumors, swallowing the familiar to the depths. The Hiss kept coming, the ceiling tinged of red light, speckled with the bodies of the people puppeteered by the resonance. 

Shit. No wonder this place is going crazy.

She gripped the service weapon tighter. Emily was in that shelter in the corner, Jesse couldn't afford to relapse now. She'd have to be the one to set things right. 

—

The Ritual Division looked like a warzone. Everything was rubble, the remnants of the shifting exposed like ribs pulled apart. The dust was still settling, but the traces of hiss were almost gone from it (thankfully). Jesse tumbled forward and almost fell, but she pivoted back and forced herself to fall on her ass with a pained grunt. There was a lot of blood dripping from her on the floor. She'd rather not even glance in the direction of her mangled arm, or she'd panic. It hurt so much.

F-focus. Am I there yet? Please let me be.

She glanced at her unrecognizable surroundings, but at least the tape on the floor remained - it was indeed the control point. She tried to take a deep breath and whined in pain when her lungs made her cracked ribs move. Everything hurt. She had to focus. If she tapped into the veins of the House it would heal her. Oh god, she was pretty sure she would faint anytime, now.

Polaris called her back to attention and the task at hand. Jesse nodded mentally, thought of the prickling sensation of standing in a stream of the House's raw energy, and prayed she could connect to it. She needed help. 

It washed through her like a strong waterfall cleaning her of a world of grime, glass and mud over her. The haze lifted at once and her sensations sharpened, unfortunately right as all the broken, mangled, diced, pierced, shot, bruised and/or torn parts of her body restored themselves to their healthy states and position, meaning it hurt like hell. She howled in pain and fell to the side, completely overwhelmed for what felt like an eternity before it began to subside.

Jesse was drenched in sweat and dust, and her face was wet from the tears the pain of healing brought her. It was a good thing her cheek was on the floor, so at least she had a cold spot to alleviate the feeling of fever for a little.

Everything was still, but she felt her heart still desperate on her chest.

It’s okay, now. We’re not dying yet.

"Director!" A voice filtered through the loud ringing in her ears. "C'mon, let's take you to Wells…"

"I'm fine" Jesse rolled and laid on her back. She was exhausted, feeling like a truck ran her over, but at least she was okay. "Gather the others. Let's get out of here."

"And what about... the bodies, ma'am?"

Shit.  

"The standard?" She tried. The ranger nodded slightly, awaiting further instructions. "Go, now."

She let her head fall back on the floor when he left, and fought the desire to just sleep. When she fought the Hiss in the astral plane, at least the Board was fueling her with whatever their power boon was. Here it was just her and the rangers, and she was a little scared she was going to pass out and die if she closed her eyes.

Can't die. Gotta get out of here. Take Emily on a date somewhere nice. Take Dylan to a park. Eat a pepperoni pizza…

"Director, ma'am! We have a problem!" Jesse heard before she saw a ranger lady come into her field of view. "The shelter is gone!"

"What?!" Jesse tried to sit up all at once, but the world spun around her and her vision blackened for a second; she had to lean on her arm to prevent herself from falling down again.

"Yeah, it just… it's not there!"

She got up with more caution than before, and despite how drained she was she made a point to stride to the other side of the room as fast as she could, fending off the terror trying to creep into her soul.

No, no, no…

The black rock blast door was there, slid to the side as it would when the shelter was open. The entrance hole was there. Where the shelter was supposed to be, though, there was only a collection of shifted concrete blocks, like tissue over a recent injury.

The House shifted the shelter somewhere else, without its protective door.

Jesse felt the air drain from her lungs, and suddenly she was shaking, and so cold…

There had to be twenty or so people in that shelter. She had to find them. She had to find Emily.

Chapter Text

"Look at her, focused on the readings like her work actually mattered."

"Darling was high when he hired her, there's no other explanation!"

"...a stain in Research's reputation…"

"I hear he keeps her out of pity…"

"What can this woman actually contribute to the Bureau? Nothing!"

Emily Pope was sitting on her chair, analyzing data from the energy receivers like she'd done for months now. She felt the eyes of her colleagues - if she could even call them that - on her back, and heard their nasty whispers like they were talking directly beside her, despite being on the other side of the lab. 

Maybe today will be the day I prove them all wrong, she thought to herself, turning a series of dials to better calibrate the sensors to a specific wavelength. 

It'd been months she was working on that project, modding and tweaking the detector to exhaustion so it would give her data on an exquisite signal she noticed amongst the ones usually present in the Oldest House. It had been too faint to study then, there had been too much interference. If Emily discovered what it was and it was useful somehow, those annoying bullies behind her would have to shut their mouths about her worth to the Bureau. Darling would have to take her seriously, finally - and maybe that much of an improbability happening would make him burst into flames or something equally baffling; Luck and Probability could attest to how weirdly those two forces behaved in the Oldest House.

Emily tore the paper with the results of the latest scan from the printing port and read it: The gist of it was there were no changes from the previous attempts, and definitely not the increase in accuracy she had hoped for. She stifled a sigh, remembering she wasn't alone in the lab. Back to the drawing board.

The experiment was proving to be very frustrating. She liked the invisible forces and signals as much as any other scientist in the FBC, but she wasn't really sure about what she should be looking for here. Darling claimed he put her on this project because it was vital that they monitored the fluctuations within energies so they could correlate it with events befalling the house, but she never saw him open her detailed reports on these topics when she'd present them to him. She needed direction, a little feedback…

" He put her here so he wouldn't have to deal with her."

"I don’t blame him. Ugh."

Emily ignored their usual poison. More paper was coming out and she picked it up, absentmindedly, thinking of the next batch of modifications she'd have to come up with, when a variation on the graph caught her attention. 

But that's… 

She went to the computer and typed in a query for documented paranatural incidents within the House for the last three days. The result was a list of about two dozen events spread throughout the sectors, and Emily started checking one by one for certain particularities that could've caused the variation in her readings. It was boring, time-consuming work, but she narrowed events down to two viable options: one was a house shift near dr. Darling's Office, and the other was a feedback loop in a control point inside the very secretive Dimensional Research, that had its entrance near Darling's office as well. Both of these events happened within minutes of each other, and coincided with the date and window of time where the variation in energy occurred. Emily couldn't tell the implications these things had for now, but she'd be happy to find out as soon as possible.

"She takes this so seriously I almost feel sorry for her. Darling just wanted some arm candy to parade around with, everyone knows that."

Emily did her best to ignore the chatter. Regardless of what anyone might think, she knew this was important, and this was enough for her.

—

"Did you see Dr. Darling?" Emily asked once more, breathless. She repeated these words so much the past hour they slipped through her lips of their own accord now. Her feet hurt from walking up and down Research and its mountain of stairs, her lungs complained from the effort, but she kept searching.

"Not at all." A middle aged woman stopped writing on her clipboard and looked at Emily with annoyance. "He was supposed to be in Parapsychology, I think."

"I looked there, they didn't see him," Emily pursed her lips, "thank you anyway."

"Yeah, yeah. You should give up. When he disappears like that…"

Emily was well aware. She'd be the first person Darling ghosted in every situation, and he still had the gall of calling her his assistance. It made her bitter, but this wasn't the time to feel sorry for herself; She really needed to find out where he went, by any means necessary. 

Something was coming. She needed to warn him, he'd know what to do.

She turned the sector upside down and still found no sign of Darling. She even tried to get into Dimensional Research, and ended up learning from the guards Darling hadn’t been seen that day. She went to his lab in Maintenance and the Quarry, with no luck. The next stop was the Executive sector, hoping that maybe HR had a record if he called in sick, or maybe he was in a meeting with a representative from another government office.

There was no trace of him there, too. Emily was heading to the elevator, absorbed with enumerating her next options and almost shaking from anxiety, when she bumped into someone in the corridor. She quickly apologized, and raised her head to find the Director eyeing her with guarded curiosity.

"Is everything okay?" Trench raised an eyebrow.

"Oh! Hello Director, you see, I was just… I really need to find Dr. Darling. It's an urgent matter. Wouldn't you have seen him by any chance?" 

Trench's expression soured at the mention of his Head of Research. "So you tell me that fool has been disappearing again? Typical. I should punish him for real this time." He crossed his arms."What is it that you need, Miss…" He straightened his glasses and tilted his head to look at her name tag. "Dr. Pope?"

Would he be able to help? Well, if anything he could allocate some people to do it…

Emily opened the binder and pointed to some graphs on it. "I've been getting suspicious energy readings tied to paranatural occurrences in the House for weeks now, and my research has shown that they're likely related to something so far unidentified trying to break into the Bureau. I need to warn Dr. Darling and discuss a plan of defense—"

"An imminent invasion, you say?" Trench's eyes widened for a second, then squinted with suspicion. "That's grave news. We should locate Marshall, she'll know what to do."

"I don't believe we have enough information to involve her yet, sir. Once I get Dr. Darling briefed on this I expect he'll—"

"Why the insistence on involving Darling?" Trench cut her off rather sharply, something he wasn't known for doing. His expression was strange - like the suspicion morphed into anger, pain… and a glint of madness deep inside his eyes.

Emily knew that look. It reminded her of home; it was the way her mother would look at her sometimes, intent on blaming her regardless of where the fault actually lay. 

She took a centering breath and spoke:"He's my boss, sir. I have to report to him for—"

"And I'm above him, Dr. Pope." He took a step forward. Emily had to actively refrain from taking a step back. "You want more researchers to figure this threat out? Equipment, resources? But if you're on his side already…"

"I'm afraid I don't understand, sir. I was under the impression there were no such things as sides here in the Bureau."

Trench huffed and towered over Emily. This time she really took a couple of steps back. "Don't take me for a fool, Pope. I know of Darling's treason. I know what he's trying to bring to the Bureau, and I won't let him!"

"I don't know what you're talking about. Excuse me, I have to—" she tried to sidestep Trench, but he grabbed her wrist before she could run away. 

"No you don't! I'll protect everyone from the lot of you!"

"Excuse me?! Let me go this instant!" She tried to free herself from his grasp, but he was stronger than her. "Help! I need Help!"

Her shouts echoed through the corridor. Trench pulled the service weapon on her and she immediately stopped. No one came to her rescue. This was the Executive Sector, why was it suddenly deser—

Emily blinked a couple of times, her eyes protesting against the strong light overhead. Her heart raced, and she felt her clothes damp with sweat. Had she been sleeping before? It had been so real, and also terrifying. Why was Trench so dead-set on seeing Darling as an enemy, what had he done to deserve that?

She remembered also dreaming that she was pressing buttons in a test room, endlessly, and people were evaluating her. Not the most unusual dream for her, but it left her with a sour taste in her mouth.

She sighed and tried to let go of the tension on her body as much as she could. She stretched arms, legs, and took deep breaths. She shouldn't panic, but this wasn't an easy task, all things considered. 

The characteristic static noise of an intercom being activated made Emily snap to attention better than any other thing rushing through her mind at the moment. She sat up quickly to see who was there to talk to her this time, more out of learned behavior than actual curiosity. Emily saw Carla Vaughn on the other side of the glass with her stony expression, and was immediately demotivated. It would be one of those days again.

Carla took the receiver to her lips and spoke. "Hello Emily, I'm here so we continue our conversation from last time."

"I already told you everything I know. If you don't want to believe it…"

"You stated that some powerful entity is coming and you were manufacturing prototypes of a harness to help keep the staff safe. However, we couldn't identify the signal said harness is supposed to amplify, or find evidence of this malevolent being trying to force its way to our reality. That's why I'm here again today, Emily: to get your statement regarding this outcome."

Emily inhaled, then sighed. "You already did that, the last three times. I told you: you already confiscated all the documentation I have on the matter, my notes, my equipment. I don't have any other way to explain to you that there are two resonances, one that can protect us and one that can kill us, both indicating signs of sentience, and we have to protect ourselves while we can." 

"The fact you claim them to be sentient is very intriguing. Could you elaborate on that? Are you, by any chance, able to communicate with them?" Carla was bored, and she didn’t bother hiding it. She wrote on her clipboard and waited for a response, running on automatic. Emily always got annoyed by how everything seemed to be uninteresting to her; She worked in the weirdest, wildest, most unexplainable place, how could she act like that? Or maybe that was just her brand of weird. It would make sense.

"No, I already told you that: it's all extrapolated from the data I gathered. It's also in my notes, if you ever bother reading them." Emily finally got out of bed and stretched fully, not taking her eyes out of her former colleague. She tried to do it as casually as she could in that glass cell. She was tired of having that conversation over and over.

Carla wasn't bothered. "Did you feel anything worth mentioning while using your device?" She pointed with her pen to the bulky harness over Emily's chest, and Emily placed her hand over it as a reflex.

"You know, I really shouldn't be cooperating with you, since you're doing this for Trench," Emily mused. Trench was pretty much dead to her, after that bizarre display of paranoia that led to him imprisoning her and his wild assumptions that Darling was out to get him and trying to tear the bureau apart.

"We could've taken the harness off of you and left you exposed to this wavelength." Carla argued.

"You don't believe the entity is real, and you're only letting me keep the harness so you can study me, especially in the event something bad happens." Emily gave her a pointed look. "It's certainly convenient."

"We are still evaluating all the options in this case, Emily. It's standard procedure."

"Oh I know." Emily sighed. "I can tell by how you've operated these last days that you suspect I am in a hallucinatory state, but the tests are all turning up negative, are they not?"

Carla's expression changed to something more closed off, a little annoyed as well. Was she pissed Emily knew the protocols by heart? She should've seen it coming.

"That's classifi—"

The lights overhead blinked a couple of times, all at once - It caught their attention - and then they blinked red before returning to their original color.

" Shit , they're here." Emily cursed under her breath.

She didn't have time to warn Carla before the lights turned red again. Carla clutched her head, screeching in pain. Emily’s instincts told her to run, but she was rooted to the spot, she couldn’t run away. Dread creeped in like ice down her spine. It was the beginning of the end.

What can I do?! How can I save her?! Her brain replied with all encompassing red , and the reminder that she was locked in a cage without any of her tools.

Carla's screeching turned into a horrible, distorted scream. Her hair was falling out spontaneously, and she scratched at her head like she was trying to dig something out of it. The edges of her form undulated weirdly, like they were both blurred and stretched. Emily could only stand and watch in horror. There was something glowing from within Carla, growing in intensity, and Emily could only pray nothing would come out of her—

Then Carla exploded. It was the weirdest, worst explosion Emily had ever seen, because it wasn't caused by volatile material; rather, it was a sort of spatial distortion that instead of obliterating matter, expelled it outwards like a blender would and distorted, fused, and solidified, like a chemical compound being frozen mid-splash after something hit the surface of its liquid form.

It snapped Emily out of her paralyzed state. She scrambled back, away from that side of the glass, and ended up leaning in the toilet for support and then vomiting into it.

Eventually, she willed herself to look at what was left of Carla Vaughn. Her torso had exploded, her ribs had melted to give way to a gaping hole in her belly, and two appendages sprouted from her... shoulders? They looked like twisted, flappy wings. Arms and legs were relatively untouched, but the whole thing had an ugly, moist liver color, and sometimes it glowed from the inside. So this was what Emily had warned people about, , what nobody had taken seriously. Did everyone suffer this fate?

She tried pushing the button and contacting the guards who were to be on duty outside the room where her cell was located, but no one picked up. Oh hell—

The distorted thing suddenly let out a haunting shriek and dashed to the side, disappearing from view in a ripple in space. Emily was grateful for not having to look at it anymore, but at the same time it was extremely worrisome: what did it do? Did it teleport? Was it going to reappear inside the cell and tear her apart? Was it even able to perceive her?

Panic made her stand in the middle of the cell and look for anything signaling an impending attack from the outside. Time stretched on. Nothing came. She tried to contact someone, anyone through the intercom, but nobody picked it up. She waited, her heart hammering in her chest.

Nothing came, human or otherwise.

She could very well be the last remaining untouched person in the bureau by this point, and no one would come to her rescue. She needed to get out and pray nothing bad found her while she ran away.

She grabbed the metal chair by the entrance and hurled it against the glass wall. It made a pitifully low arc and hit it, not even scratching the surface. After that Emily grabbed it again and started swinging it at the glass like it could actually make a dent in it.

It couldn't, but she still tried.

She used all her strength and her drive to survive. She hit the glass until her arms hurt and her energy was spent. She had never been particularly good at physical tasks, but she tried with all her might. So she hit and hit and hit and hit and hit and hit and hit and hit and a copy of a copy of a copy—

The sound of the door being opened before Emily startled her awake from whichever daydream she was having before. A woman emerged with a clipboard and called her name, making her almost jump from the leather couch with how anxious she was for this moment. She asked for the woman's name, but she only looked at her like she had grown a second head and led her inside, to a small room with a desk, two chairs on opposite sides of it, and a blank whiteboard. The woman explained she'd leave Emily in the room with some tests designed to measure her knowledge and abilities. Emily confirmed that she understood the instructions and smiled at the woman. The woman barely acknowledged her, and left her alone with her test. As soon as the  door clicked shut behind her, Emily rushed to open the envelope on the desk: she found cards with simple glyphs inside it and the instruction to match them to the ones that would appear on the tube TV placed near the wall. She knew what the cards were: a zener deck, and the test was a way to measure her extrasensory perception.

As expected, she wasn't clairvoyant at all. Her rate of right answers was securely within the margin of chance. That didn't upset her in the slightest, though, she knew her abilities lay in her imaginative approach and mastery of known science. She got up and went through a door opposite to the one she entered from. Had it been there before?  There was darkness, but it wasn’t black. It pulsated, it changed—

Emily opened her eyes and groaned. She had slept with her face on the desk again. Ugh, that would be awesome for her back, especially because she had been sitting there for a long time.

She wanted to be back at her apartment and lay down on her bed, forgetting everything else for a whole weekend. Radical, by her standards, but welcome.

Unfortunately she had to get on with her work until that happened, so she raised her head inch by inch and dragged herself up to the bathroom, to wash her face. What had she been dreaming about? Someone was saying something, but she forgot the words. The name… name? Of what? She was confused, and unreasonably on edge. 

Inhale. Exhale. Emily had to go back to work, the amplifiers wouldn't just make themselves. 

She walked back to the lab reflecting about the dozens of HRAs they’d manufactured these last days. They weren't nearly enough to outfit even one sector of the bureau, but at least it was a start. It had been difficult to convince the people of the importance of making them, especially with Darling still missing. Where was he anyway? It had been more than a week now.

"Hey Emily, you look pale." Hubert Tan approached, carrying a pile of black rock slabs. "Go eat something, we'll take care of things."

"Thanks, friend. I'll grab some granola bars."

"Oh no, Dr. Pope! You need to put actual food in this body of yours." He chuckled, good naturedly. "I have to take these to the cutter, but—

The ground shook beneath them for a couple of seconds, enough to catch their attention. It wasn't an uncommon occurrence in the Oldest House by any means, but it always meant something was happening.

"What do you think it is this time?" Hubert asked from over his shoulder, humorous. "Someone forgot to drop their number two pencil off at the entrance?"

"Could be." Emily snickered, watching Hubert distance himself. He was okay. Emily couldn't help but feel a little jealous of him, though, because he got to see more of Darling's secrets than her, the proclaimed Head of Research's assistant. Dwelling on this wouldn't help her, though. Emily always strived to be someone whose work and ethics spoke for her, and she didn't need Darling for that.

I'm getting sidetracked , she thought, I need food.

She walked a couple of steps before the earth shook again. Whatever was happening, it had to be more than the House exploding modern technology.

The lights turned red all of a sudden, and Emily frowned. Was an AWE taking place? She walked towards the labs, intent on getting their paranatural energy measurement tool, and met with scientists coming out of the place, seemingly to check their surroundings. They looked as confused as she was.

"How weird, it's like this everywhere!" one of them said.

She passed them by and entered the HRA lab, where people were already using the tool and talking over each other, trying to figure out what was going on and if they should head to a shelter just to be safe. 

They opted to do so, since the paranatural energy levels were off the charts, and that surely meant whatever was happening could soon cause house shifts. No one wanted to end up lost and walled-up for days; the group made their way through Defensive Studies towards the shelter in the Ritual Division, but what they found there made them halt in their tracks.

The place was shifted to a point huge blocks of concrete protruded and receded randomly, looking like tumors in the omnipresent red light, but that wasn't the worst of it: People floated limply everywhere, some lit from their insides, all of them reciting something the group couldn't quite understand from that distance.

"What the fuck is that?!" one of the scientists mumbled under his breath. The floating people with their glowing insides all turned in the group's direction, and Emily knew the threat she had been anticipating was finally here.

The people dropped to the floor and came running in their direction, raising firearms and batons. They were all guards, she noticed—

"Run!" Someone shouted among the scientists and all hell broke loose, everyone trying to go back to the HRA lab with no regard for each other. A shot pierced through Dr. Lewis' leg, followed by another one through his ribs and finally one through his head. Blood splattered everywhere, and people ran faster, tripping over each other. Paula Bronte was shot in the shoulder and kept running, Dr. Larson's HRA took a bullet meant for his chest and he started shaking, gripped his head in pain, and started floating limply, completely unaware of anything else. Dr. Higa was hit in the side by a bullet and fell to her knees. Someone stopped to help her.

A fleeting vision flickered through Emily's head, someone exploding, twisting, melding together in an entirely wrong way.

The scientists kept running, taking cover wherever they could. A couple were shot down as they re-entered the HRA lab and closed the massive door. 

At least they were safe from the… creatures, now.

"Christ, they were— they were—!!" One woman sat down on the floor and brushed her hair back with her fingers, on the verge of a nervous breakdown.

"Puppets, I guess." Dr. Bronte pressed the wound in her shoulder as hard as she could, but blood soaked her shirt. "Do we have first aid kits here?"

"I'm gonna get one!" Hubert Tan stopped fidgeting and darted upstairs, to the small server room overlooking the one they were in.

Emily followed his lead and started looking for anything they could use as bandages for the wounded colleagues, her head spinning. Why did it get here so early? Their predictions showed it would be at least a week till the force they were now facing would be able to make its way through the House's natural defenses. What changed? 

Regardless, they weren't ready. Now they had to focus on surviving and finding a way to fight back.

A weird distorted sound brought her back to the present. A second later the creatures they kept at bay simply appeared out of thin air in the middle of the lab and she realized that this was the end - no one there could escape or fight those things. She tried her best making the HRAs so she could give them a chance, but now she realized her efforts were insignificant in the face of the threat. If anything, she just secured her colleagues a painful death rather than one being overtaken by an extraplanar entity that was fond of red.

The things rushed in, shot the scientists down. The red from her blood mixed with the red from the lights, the red from searing pain - and here they were: a dozen colleagues twisted and dried banged against the glass walls of the cell she was in, they cracked them. Hissing, pulsing, red.

And black. Oblivion. 

Oblivion looked a lot like she was pressing buttons, locked in a room as a monkey going through tests.

Emily shuddered, immediately taking a hand to her ribs. There was no bullet wound there, despite the pain she still felt. She was laying on the metal floor of the cell, face down. Did she fall? She groaned and flipped to her back. The pain ebbed off, little by little. The light overhead was still red. Yes… Carla Vaughn had just exploded, had she not?

That was exactly the sort of thing Emily tried to warn the others about, but they wouldn't listen. Now she was probably the only sane person in the whole bureau, and she couldn't do anything to save the others or herself.

She was useless, despite her good intentions. Everything was already lost.

"You know, this is fuuunny to watch."

She sat up immediately and looked around for the source of the voice. The newcomer wasn't difficult to find: he was a bald man with deep bags under his eyes, wearing a gray pajama much like Emily's. He had a glint of unconcealed and senseless joy in his blue eyes that was almost childlike, and he sat leaning on the glass from the outside. He didn't have an HRA or any other protective contraption with him, and the way he smiled made Emily question if he was sane or just a different kind of possessed.

"You can't figure out a single little thing," he practically sang the last three words, his smile growing in delight, "it's all over your face." He spoke and chuckled like he was inebriated, on top of it all.

"I'm terribly sorry, who are you?" Emily tried to be as non-threatening as possible, considering the possibility he was being controlled by that unknown entity. 

He ignored her and kept talking as he pleased. "And it's soooo ironic that you're locked up here, isn't it? Not easy having a Dylan day, is it?" He outright laughed this time, throwing his head back and making a show of returning to the previous position.

"Dylan? Is that your name?" 

"Sometimes, when I remember." He shrugged like it was no big deal. 

"Okay, Dylan, I don't know how you got in here but there's an invasion going on, you should try to get out as fast as possible…" Emily took a glance towards the door, half expecting whatever Carla had become to reappear and tear that man to shreds. He, on the other hand, was completely unbothered. In fact, he started laughing again.

"I can't ever get out," he said playfully, the grin on his face so big it looked painful to maintain, "it's everywhere. It got me, it got you — my sister must be so mad! After throwing me aside for you, you go and get… broken. How embarrassing."

Was Dylan in his right mind? He wasn't making sense, but something ached inside her in reaction to his words. It was a wild guess, but maybe she should know what he was talking about, but didn't; something clouded her memories, altered or maybe even stole them. "Your sister? I… I don't get it. I'm not terribly popular, as you may have noticed," she gestured around, to the cell, "I can't recall anyone ever putting me in higher regards than their own brother like you say."

"As it should've been," he nodded, pleased with himself, "it's just not right, to go stealing sisters from her brothers like that."

"I didn't—"

"Of course not." He had a mocking tone and inebriated expression, and Emily wanted very much to leave him talking to himself.

Maybe he'd have full conversations and some healthy entertainment then. She had better things to do, like focusing on doing something about this entity loose in the bureau. Maybe she could still improve her situation.

“But everything was okay before you, and after? Not so much. Amazing how coincidences work, right? Maybe they should study you.” He said and gave her a knowing look, and the moment she saw the red glinting off his eyes, she had another vision of pressing buttons. Someone praised her through the intercom, absolutely condescending. She wore a rather weird helmet that probably sent them information about her brain, and she wanted to go home.

Emily shook her head, then ran a hand through her hair to be sure she wasn’t wearing a helmet. None of what she saw was real. Dylan was messing with her mind somehow, and it was really annoying her. "Why don't you tell me whatever it was I supposedly did to separate you and your sister instead of being an ass about it? I get it, you want to torture me a little, but dragging this on is very unproductive, and we're probably going to get killed here if we don't do anything to get out of here soon."

"Killed? Well that would be goooood. Not having to think of anything or even exist? Paradise!" He laughed. "I bet you'd like it if I died, too."

"What do you expect me to say? Yes? The very notion that I'd be this petty is ridiculous." Emily huffed, her eyes dead set on Dylan. "Have you considered that if you used the time you're spending obsessing about my supposed villainy to actually bond with your sister you two might not be as estranged as you claim?"

The air suddenly felt thicker, and the red cast by the lamps overhead seemed to pulse against the cell from all sides. It was a weird, claustrophobic sensation.

Dylan was on his feet, and he knocked on the glass as if he wanted to break it. "I would if our city wasn't gone because you put doubt in her mind! Now I can't even see her anymore, you sister-robber!"

"I don't have a clue what you're talking about. I don't know you or your sister; if you're going to blame me, at least have the decency of letting me know exactly what you're blaming me for!"

"Ha." The pressure Emily was feeling from all sides dispersed and Dylan sat back down, cross legged, laughing like a dog who was kicked. "So composed, so helpful, eager! Reeeeeady to work. Shiny eyes! Of course she'd love you. Of course she'd spin around you like she was a silly little moon, but you… work… here." He didn't bother masking the disgust when he mentioned the bureau. "Of course this is going to be terrible. Darling's new shiny kid, after he threw me aside!"

What? 

Emily stopped in her tracks. Dylan had been Darling's "kid", as in, a research assistant? Did Darling alienate him from his projects as well?

Did Emily unknowingly take his job and his sister?!

That was crazy and made her feel a little guilty, but her mind quickly reminded her that the disgust in his words wouldn't have been caused by the loss of a job - or at least, not just by it. Something very bad must've happened.

"What did he do to you?" she asked quietly, with no hint of annoyance left.

"As if you cared," was Dylan's reply.

He had a good point. Did Emily care enough, or was her curiosity winning over her empathy? What would be gained from making him possibly relive his traumatic experiences?

"Sorry. I shouldn't pry," Emily offered, and Dylan rolled his eyes.

"But you will anyway, won't you. That's what you scientists do."

"Actually no, I won't. I just want to get out, reach somewhere safe and find a way to end this invasion. There's no telling what could happen if this entity of… red light? Reaches the outside world."

Dylan raised his eyebrows, tilted his head. "It's already out. You see, you've… lost." His voice trembled, and once more he had that weird, unstable smile. "And it's beautiful out there. Everybody repeating the words. The name of the sound. It resonates in your house—"

Emily had the urge to join in, the words at the tip of her tongue already: After the song, time for applause. We build you till nothing remains. The egg cracks and the truth—

NO! No no no no no—

She had to stop, she had to resist, she had to remember —

Where was she? She needed her. Desperately. She needed help. Her guiding star. She couldn't do this alone.

The hissing in her mind was too strong ( baby, baby, baby, yeah ).

Orange peel . Her skin unfolding, her brain shining red, pulsing.

Her name was Emily Pope, and she sat on a chair as she watched her mother argue with other scientists on the other side of the glass, pointing at her. She saw her shake her head in disappointment, drop her clipboard on a table and leave. No one noticed she was still there. 

The strong light over her turned red. 

She didn't have to feel those things anymore. She wanted to smile (she wanted to hurt)— 

The sky was red. People floated on the streets of New York. Emily failed. Dylan smiled; Beautiful , he said. She didn't understand, but maybe she would once she was one of them.

How endlessly kind of them to have a spot even for a failure like her. Everything in its place. Everyone with a purpose. You are home.

Home was somewhere else. Gentle, fierce blue eyes. Butterflies in her stomach. Something… Something… spinning.

The hissing in her head was too strong.

—

Chapter Text

The world passed by in slow motion. Colors and shapes blurred away, sounds were muffled, awareness was restricted - the only thing Jesse could pay attention to was right in front of her.

Emily was there, floating like a ragdoll suspended by the shoulder. Her HRA dangled from the left side straps, and the shard of a foundation crystal was embedded in the casing of the device. Red sand and blood stained her clothes, mostly from her scratched up forearms, and her once expressive face was emotionless as her lips intoned a familiar incantation. 

Emily was taken by the Hiss, and Jesse could only stare in horror.