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It’s dead silent inside the warehouse.
Ryuunosuke’s chest heaves in exertion. Remnants of adrenaline still course through his veins, though exhaustion is starting to creep in by now. Below him, Atsushi is in a similar state.
It has been six months since they made the deal. When Ryuunosuke declared to kill Atsushi. When Ryuunosuke promised not to kill anyone in turn.
Ryuunosuke had been unprepared for the difficulties the requirements of the agreement would bring. Not killing people in a profession where death and violence are a constant had been a grueling trial to say the least.
Still, he had put everything into keeping his word. He felt the need to prove himself to Atsushi. And it wasn’t something that was overlooked either. Every time the two had finished a joined mission, Atsushi would smile at him and tell him he did a good job. Though Atsushi didn't specify that it was over the no-killing rule, the implications didn’t go unnoticed.
Atsushi. To anyone else, it probably would’ve looked like they had warmed up to one another to a certain degree. Their encounters have become less hostile over time, and the two had been able to rely on each other in a way they hadn’t been able to before with others.
But a deal’s still a deal. They were working on a deadline. Nothing would change that.
When the two had met up at the spot they’d agreed to have the showdown, Atsushi appeared to be… reluctant to say the least. In the days leading up to these events, Atsushi had been rather somber, yet anytime Ryuunosuke asked him about it he was met with complete silence.
It had unnerved him at the time, only adding to his own anxiety over their upcoming battle.
Beneath him Atsushi struggles, trying to regain the upper hand. Ryuunosuke had straddled him in an attempt to subdue him but it was futile. Still, Atsushi was incapable of giving up, fighting even when the odds are against him.
Ryuunosuke yanks him by the tie, the fabric pulling taut and forcing Atsushi to lean further into him. Atsushi moves to clutch his arm, claws digging into his wrist yet not piercing the skin. His other hand moves to tear at the back of Ryuunosuke’s coat. On any other day, this would aggravate him to no end but he’s too caught up in the moment to react to it.
They’re close. Their breaths mingle, a faint metallic scent in the air. Atsushi’s face is littered with cuts and bruises, a single trail of blood trickling down his temple. Ryuunosuke’s fully aware that he’s not fairing any better.
Their battle had been brutal. Atsushi had been nicked by rashoumon several times. Atsushi, in turn, had done his own fair share of lasting damage on Ryuunosuke’s physique.
Ryuunosuke will be left with a limp for several days, while Atsushi will recover from his injuries in a matter of hours.
That is, of course, if he’ll be able to walk out of this place alive.
“You’ve won,” Atsushi growls.
“I have,” Ryuunosuke reaffirms, but his heart’s not in it. He remains frozen in place and Ryuunosuke visibly sees Atsushi’s patience run thin.
“Well? I’m at your mercy now,” Ryuunosuke’s eyes snap to Atsushi’s. They shine gold and Ryuunosuke notes that there doesn’t appear to be an ounce of fear in them. Instead, he stares back at Ryuunosuke in defiance, almost daring him to make a move. “Why don’t you get it over with and kill me.”
Ryuunosuke wonders to himself when Atsushi stopped being afraid of him. He’s got quite some nerve, to be demanding for Ryuunosuke to make a move knowing that the fate of his pitiful existence lies in his hands.
Yet in spite of Atsushi’s provocation, he can’t bring himself to do it. The thought of ending Atsushi’s life right here, something that he’d been looking forward to since the moment he first met him, only fills him with dread now.
There’s something that’s holding him back. Over the course of these past few months, Atsushi has actually come to mean something to him. And that revelation frightens Ryuunosuke.
He’s been bottling up his feelings for Atsushi all this time, unable to himself to face them.
His breathing, which had already been labored before, picks up. It doesn’t go unnoticed.
“Hey,” Ryuunosuke startles out of his panicked train of thoughts. Atsushi reaches out, slowly, and grasps the hand that’s twisted around his tie. Ryuunosuke only now realizes that it’s begun to tremble.
Atsushi begins to run his thumbs over Ryuunosuke’s knuckles, a gesture that both soothes his nerves and adds to the tightness in his chest.
Atsushi’s gaze, which has softened, is full of understanding and acceptance. And something else. Something he can’t bring himself to put a name to.
“Thank you for keeping your promise,” Ryuunosuke’s eyes widen in shock. Atsushi tucks a stray strand of hair behind his ear and as he retreats his fingertips brush against Ryuunosuke’s cheek, leaving scorching heat in their wake. Ryuunosuke finds that he’s both repulsed and enamored by it.
“I’m proud of you,” Ryuunosuke freezes, the praise sinking in. It hits him deep within his core, an ugly part of him that’s desperate for validation. It’s in this moment that he begins to realize that he’s grown to value Atsushi’s opinion of him. A development that had been gradual over time.
And that’s the final straw. All the different emotions warring inside him become too much for him to process at once. He retreats from Atsushi’s touch, fumbling as pulls back.
It’s almost laughable, that the rabid dog of the port mafia has been reduced to such a state.
“This means nothing,” Ryuunosuke hisses. Atsushi’s expression morphs from visible confusion into one of hurt, and Ryuunosuke has to swallow the sense of guilt that comes along with it.
“Akutagawa—“ Atsushi reaches out once more in an attempt to make him stay, but Ryuunosuke recoils.
“I may have spared your life today, but don’t be fooled,” Akutagawa growls, “I will still tear you limb for limb if I so much feel like it. Nothing’s changed.”
Atsushi’s gaze hardens in defiance, and in that moment Ryuunosuke knows. He knows that Atsushi knows he’s bluffing. It’s unsettling, another thing to add to his mess of feelings.
There’s a lot of things that aren’t making sense to Ryuunosuke right now, so he decides to follow his impulses; to flee.
Distantly he’s aware that it’s an act of cowardice.
He limps away from the scene, a bitter aftertaste in his mouth. He distinctly feels like he’s been lying.
Though, whether he’s been lying to Atsushi or to himself remains unknown.