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"Doc Holliday?!" Dean exclaimed incredulously. When Cas only squinted at him in return he continued.
"Val Kilmer?!" He was beginning to sound more and more unbalanced. "Tombstone?! Come on man, I thought Metatron zapped all of- everything- up there-" He gestured upwards at Castiel's head as he spoke.
"I understand what the reference is from Dean, but it doesn't hold the same weight for me since I haven't actually seen the film," Cas responded slowly. He was looking up at Dean with a faintly concerned expression, who seemed to be getting strangely hysterical over the matter.
Dean looked at Cas with over-dramatized disgust for a moment before speaking.
"Come on." He straightened upright where he stood, a determined look in his eyes.
"Where?" Cas questioned from his seat, he glanced around the bunker library, still slightly concerned but mostly confused.
"We're watching Tombstone."
Cas sighed lightly but began to stand. "I don't understand your obsession with this movie or that Val man."
At that, he noticed a faint blush paint Dean’s cheeks. It was so subtle he wasn’t sure if it was really there.
“I’m not- Shut up- Let’s go.” Dean hastily made his way out of the common area, down a hallway. Cas followed compliantly, watching his friend speed ahead. As Dean strode, Cas began to notice where he was headed and realised they would be watching the movie in Dean’s room.
Dean rushed through the door and Cas trailed behind, peering his head inside. He hadn’t spent any significant amount of time in there and felt an inkling of hesitation at intruding the space.
“Stop lurking, get in here.” Dean sat at the end of his bed, his laptop resting on his knees as he clicked away.
Cas left the comfort of the doorway and made his way inside, lingering for a moment before seating himself next to Dean, a safe distance away. He noticed the other man tense slightly, his hand freezing over the computer. It lasted only a moment though, as he breathed out quickly and continued what he was doing. Cas glanced around at the room, turning his head in all directions, catching glimpses of the guns on the walls, the pictures on the desk, the lamp in the corner. It was chaotic but composed all the same.
“Here we go.”
He looked back over at the laptop on which Dean had pulled up the movie. Before he could comment Dean threw his hands up in annoyance.
“Argh shit. We should’ve made popcorn. Just- wait here I’ll be back in a sec.” Dean shoved the laptop onto Cas’ lap and made his way out the door hastily.
While Cas sat there he read over the plot description, shaking his head fondly at the mention of cowboys. He never could understand what Dean’s fascination was with them. Was it the outfits? He had thought about asking Dean, however, he’d probably take offence at the questioning.
Cas remained waiting for several minutes until he heard someone pacing down the hallway.
“Back!” Dean walked back in - a bowl of popcorn in hand - and dropped down next to him again.
“You ready!?” He questioned, looking up at Cas. Excitement glimmered behind his eyes, a small hopeful smile on his face. Cas couldn’t help but smile back. He nodded, not breaking eye contact. They remained like that for a moment.
Dean cleared his throat and looked back down at the screen. He shuffled in place where he sat and suddenly frowned.
“What’s wrong?” Cas questioned.
“Not gonna be real comfortable sitting here for 2 hours,” he muttered mostly to himself. He glanced back at the bed awkwardly, contemplating for a moment. Cas noted internally that he seemed tense.
Finally, with a sense of purpose Dean stood up and made his way to the side of the bed, sitting back down on the other end, adjusting a pillow behind his back. He began to lay his legs out, but then seemed to decide against it and crossed them on the bed instead. He glanced up at Cas, slapping the side next to him.
“Well come on, sit.” His voice was a little tight.
Cas followed suit, however left his legs hanging off the side of the bed. His shoes skimming the floor. He looked up at Dean only to catch him rolling his eyes.
“Sit properly- And take those damn shoes off.”
Cas squinted a glare at him but complied. Laying his legs out comfortably.
“Okay, now prepare to have your mind blown.” Dean’s smile returned as he hit play on the video, shovelling a heap of popcorn into his mouth as he did.
Cas huffed out a silent laugh.
***
“Dean.”
“Just. Be patient, okay. And keep your eyes closed.” He snapped.
Cas sighed. He had walked into Dean’s room like many other times before, expecting they’d be having another one of their movie nights. The list of things he just had to see - according to Dean - was never-ending. And while he did roll his eyes every time Dean whipped out his phone and made a note of yet another movie they had to watch together. He secretly didn’t mind. He wouldn’t say it out loud to Dean, because it would probably make him uncomfortable, but that time together was one of few things he ever looked forward to.
However, now, he had no idea what was going on. And he was starting to feel a bit impatient.
“Where are you taking me Dean?” He’d gotten no proper answer the first few times he’d asked, and it was the same again.
“Just- keep your hand on my shoulder and stay quiet,” Dean grumbled back. He didn’t sound mad, however. Nothing seemed to be dwindling his excitement over whatever this was. Cas squeezed the shoulder he was holding onto the slightest amount, in acknowledgement. He appreciated the contact. He sighed again, resigning himself to just stay quiet. He’d find out whatever was going on soon enough.
Finally, he felt Dean slow to a stop in front of him.
“Can I open my eyes now?”
“No! Wait-” Dean stepped out of his grasp and pushed him forward slightly, holding onto his arms from the side. He heard the man next to him breathe out determinedly.
“Okay open em up.”
Cas slowly opened his eyes, one at a time. His eyes adjusted to the light again for a moment.
He realised he was standing in the doorway of a room in the bunker he hadn’t been in before. Across from him were two recliners. He peered his head to the side and noticed a foosball table. The room was full of various paraphernalia, a juke-box, records, as well as a table on one end littered with beer bottles. Empty he presumed.
“Dean, what is this?” Cas questioned as he walked in, gazing around curiously.
“It’s uh- well. I’m still working on the name. Fortress of Deanitude doesn’t quite have the ring I’m looking for but I’ll figure it out eventually- I- that’s not the point. What do you think?”
Cas looked over at him. His grin was beaming, and he was shuffling in place excitedly. However, he also seemed nervous. Cas realised he was waiting for his reaction.
“It’s great Dean. But-”
“Right? We’ve got everything we could need. Only thing missing is a TV. Still need to get one, but it’ll go up there.” He pointed past the recliners. “I was thinking we could have our movie nights here. I mean that was the main reason I-” He rubbed the back of his neck, huffing out a laugh. “But yeah, then I got a bit carried away with the rest.”
Cas looked around smiling; mostly because of how happy the space seemed to make Dean. Then something registered.
“Wait. You put this together for us?” He tilted his head. For some reason, the thought made his eyes water ever so slightly. He felt a warmth in his chest.
Dean avoided his gaze, coughing awkwardly. “Hah. I just wanted somewhere to watch TV properly you know- it wasn’t like- anyways.” He trailed off.
Cas’ smile tightened slightly, he didn’t understand why Dean seemed defensive. Especially when it was an appreciated gesture.
“Still. I think it’s wonderful.”
At that Dean’s awkwardness seemed to wash away for a moment. A cheesy grin broke out onto his face and he looked down as if trying to hide it.
“Well yeah- thanks.” He muttered softly, before straightening up again.
“Anyway, don’t tell Sam yet, we can show him when it’s properly set up. Um, but yeah since there’s no TV yet we’ll still gotta make do with the smaller screen for now.” He gestured at the laptop sitting on one of the recliners, Cas hadn’t noticed it there until that moment. He looked up at Dean.
“I’ll go make the popcorn.” He began to make his way out the door, with a smile on his face he couldn’t keep off.
As he was halfway down the hallway he heard Dean call out.
“Don’t burn it again!”
Cas rolled his eyes. That had only happened one time.
***
Dean sat in bed, his back against a pillow, head leaned back. He’d been scrolling aimlessly through his phone for he didn’t know how long. Time didn’t seem to matter anymore.
Some days it would go on forever, each hour a painful trek to wade through. That was on the days he tried. He’d get up, be normal, look for hunts, apply for jobs when Sam wasn’t looking - just do anything to keep his mind off things, to get the day to pass. But on those days the absence just felt heavier. What he’d lost seemed more blatant. It was a weight latched to his ankles as he tried not to drown.
On other days - the ones where he’d lay still in bed all day - time was slow and fast altogether. It was a sluggish existence, and yet before he knew it it would be night again and he would have passed the entire day doing nothing. If he didn’t have to feed Miracle he probably wouldn’t even move.
He continued to scroll.
Absentmindedly he clicked on the notes app on his phone and began to look through halfheartedly. Information about hunts, grocery lists, midnight musings, nothing too interesting. He read through them all, hoping the mind-numbing reading would drown out his thoughts. He couldn’t rely on music to do it anymore. It reminded him of too much.
After he’d been through the first few notes, one particular list caught his eye. He felt a jab in his heart. His throat tightened. He swallowed and clicked on it against his better judgement.
His eyes watered slightly as he stared at the screen, it felt brighter than before, painfully so. He didn’t bother blinking away the tears beginning to form. There was no one to see them, aside from Miracle who was curled up on the end of the bed.
In a moment of masochistic self-pity, he began to scroll through the list and count the items on it.
Twenty-three movies that he never got to show him.