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Silence, and the occasional sound of a page turning. Come to think of it, it had been a while since he had heard the latest one.
He looked over his shoulder. Just the soft pink glow of a single salt lamp on her midnight blue hair. Her book and phone lay on the table. Megumi had curled up on the couch, her eyes closed, and her breathing even and slow. Sleeping? And yet, she’s not one to pass out like that…
Curled up, she felt an indentation near her feet as the sofa softly gave way to his weight. A slight creak and his hand pressed against her arm with reassuring strokes—not too fast, and not too slow. I’m here. Fingers swept across her cheek before falling down her neck and resting on her collarbones. Her next inhale; she knew it was him, of course, but she could not help but try to name his complexities. Cinnamon, coriander, kombu, old scientific journals...a faint trace of incense...Akira… One more deep breath in.
She exhaled and opened her eyes, yet stared straight ahead. He understood. Fetal position. Purposefully deep breathing. I’ve been here before, too, my darling. His fingers gently nudged her shoulder and she sat up against him. Just hold her. His arms wrapped around her. Just a little tighter; help make her feel safe. The circle of his arms tightened ever so slightly, and her hands rounded over his forearms. This situation...it’s so...unpredictable… “Are you afraid?” His voice was quiet and calm, un-accusatory. She continued to stare off into space. “Hai.”
She leaned into his chest, hugging his arms tight toward her. His breathing. Listen to his breathing. Her heart calmed again and their breaths merged, slow and steady; a silent meditation for two. And yet, I’m sure I’m not the only one… After a while she glanced up toward him. The tiniest reassuring smile on her lips reflected deeply in her eyes. “Are you afraid, as well, love?”
Of course not. The likelihood of—. No. That’s not actually true, is it? He paused. His eyes flitted afar before returning to hers. “Hai.” She gave a tiny nod and her fingers loosened, wriggling the circle of his arms wider as she turned toward him. Her arms circled around his back as she embraced him, holding him just as tightly as he held her. I’m here. Her warm, steady breath rustled past his ear, summer and tiny ripples of water over the lake. Her head nestled toward him and he buried his face in her hair. And as with every time, he inhaled her scent, this time of lavender and dirt and kombu and coriander and too many wonderful things to mention. Her heartbeat. Listen to her heartbeat.
The arms of twin bands remained interlocked. I don’t know what tomorrow brings, but I’m here. I’m here for you.