Work Text:
“Donna Moss speaking.”
Josh smiled, a sigh of relief threatening to break free from his lips. He didn’t know what he expected when he decided to call her, but a part of him was nervous that she wouldn’t sound the same, that she would still sound fragile and broken, and that his heart wouldn’t be able to handle it again. But she sounded like her usual self, and he couldn’t have been happier.
“You do realize you don’t need to answer the phone like that when you’re not in the office, right?” His smile lingered on his lips as he said these words.
“I need to practice so when I get back I’m not totally useless,” she said, “The least I can do is answer phones correctly considering you’ll be wheeling me around.”
“Ah yes, all the power will be mine,” he grinned widely, and he could just picture the eye-roll he was eliciting on the other end of the phone.
“Is there a reason you called, Joshua? Or was it just to brag that you are the superior human because you have two fully functioning legs?”
Josh, who was never at a loss for words, who always had a quick response and a witty comeback, had nothing to say. He didn’t really have a reason for calling her, except for the fact that he missed her more than a boss should ever miss one’s assistant, and that going days on end without hearing her voice was going to slowly drive him insane. He realized that they clearly did not have a normal working relationship, and that it was completely fine to call someone you consider a best friend to see how they are doing; he also realized it was more than that. He knew that it looked a very specific way when he dropped everything and flew to Germany to see her, when he waited by her bed and held her hand and told her that he wasn’t going anywhere. It looked how it was, but they had an intricate dance, and they walked a very fine line, and disturbing that all together seemed dangerous.
“Well last time you went to Wisconsin you dropped off the face of the Earth for a few months,” Josh landed on, “Just had to make sure that wasn’t gonna happen again.”
“You are insufferable,” she said immediately, making him laugh into the receiver, “and clearly incapable of doing anything without me if you are so nervous I’m never coming back.”
“You got that right, Donnatella.” His voice had softened, and without even meaning to he made the situation more serious. He was admitting that he did, in fact, need her.
Donna was silent after that, probably coming to the same conclusion Josh came to as soon as the words left his mouth. He didn’t necessarily regret saying it, but if he kept up with it, he’d be telling her much more by the end of the week.
“I’m coming back, Josh,” she finally said, “now, let me go so I can keep reading.”
He raised a brow, “Reading? I didn’t give you anything.”
“I had a life before I came to work for you, surprisingly. I used to enjoy things like reading for joy. I figured why not take advantage of not having a single thing to do besides lay in this bed with my foot propped up,” she explained.
She certainly deserved it, Josh thought. If she could find any silver living to the disaster that was Gaza, then who was he to question it?
“Bye then,” he said.
“Goodbye Joshua.” …
... “Joshua Lyman, smartest Deputy Chief of Staff, greatest man in the universe speaking!”
The other end of the line was silent. The only thing Josh could hear was the static created by the two phones, and he was almost positive that she was still on the line. A few moments passed, and she still hadn’t said anything. He sighed, “Hello? Anyone there?”
“Oh yeah, sorry, I was just contemplating on whether to hang up the phone or taunt you endlessly for whatever the hell that was,” she finally spoke, and now he could definitely imagine the look on her face, the half-amused, half-aggravated expression, completed with a roll of her eyes.
“I’m glad you didn’t hang up, I won majorly with those stupid Replicans today-”
“Ah, it’s always a nice reminder that a child is helping to run this country,”
Josh continued on, ignoring Donna’s jab, “and completely bypassed all their additives and regulations they tried tacking onto the Healthcare bill! I am victorious, the American people are one step closer to not being kicked in the ass every time they so much as look at a hospital building, and Republicans can still kiss my ass.”
“You know, if you just started with telling me about the bill, I would’ve asked you about it and then you could’ve bragged a bit,” she said.
“Where’s the fun in that?” he asked, “but really, it was great. Even Toby’s walking around here with a smile.”
She sighed, “I wish I was there to see that,” she said, her voice less animated than it was before, “even with all of your ridiculousness.”
“You’ll be back soon enough, Donatella,” he said, trying to sound more serious. She was clearly not happy with being stuck at home right now, or with anything that has happened in the last few weeks, which was pretty understandable, “I’ll have a stack of papers with your name on them,” he tried to joke.
“Josh…” her voice was wary now, and he wasn’t sure what to do. He didn’t know if this was in response to him making a joke, or if she was about to approach an entirely different subject. He wished he could see her face right now to actually understand what she was feeling.
When he didn’t answer, something he did intentionally so she would keep going, she spoke again, “I want more, Josh,” she said, almost timidly, a tone he hardly heard her use, “I can’t keep doing the same things day in and day out. I’m experienced, and I know you know that.”
He did know that. He knew that every single time he gave her papers to read or a schedule to create that it was way below her pay grade at this point; that she has basically helped draft legislation and sat in on multiple important meetings. She can keep up with Josh, hell, she could keep up with the President at this point. But that meant that he would lose her. The rational part of his brain told him that was ridiculous, that if he talked with Leo, or Cj, or even Toby about giving her a promotion that it would take little to no convincing, and that she would only be a five minute walk away, if that. He also realized that if she didn’t work for him anymore, maybe the not so rational part of his brain can finally make some sort of move.
He tried, though. He sent her to Gaza, and he admits it was partly just so she would stop bugging him about the Berlin trip, but he also realized she was quickly outgrowing her position and if he didn’t do this, there may be consequences. Oh, there were consequences alright. She almost died because of him, and the thought of giving her more responsibilities made him almost physically sick.
“Maybe I shouldn’t have said that over the phone… Maybe we should have had lunch or something,” she muttered before he could say something, “but I kind of have nothing else to do but think about going back to work right now, and it’s been eating at me.”
“I’m gonna talk to Leo alright,” Josh said, hating the idea of her mulling over this when she already had so much to worry about, “I know you deserve more opportunities, I mean, you’ve literally turned yourself into this political genius. I’ve been selfish.”
“Maybe a little,” Donna said, “but it’s because I’ve been the world’s best assistant and there will be no way to top that.”
Josh groaned, not even thinking of the idea that he would have to train someone else, someone who probably would never get to Donna’s level, “What if I just give you a raise?” he asked.
“You don’t have that power.”
“I’ll give you money from my paycheck,” he deadpanned, not completely serious, but serious enough that if she agreed he would start doing some quick math.
“As sweet as that would be Joshua, I think I’d rather take my political genius elsewhere,” she said, and he could tell she was wearing a wide grin.
“As long as by elsewhere you mean somewhere with more responsibilities within the White House,” Josh said without thinking or filtering his thoughts. He meant it completely, but was once again feeling as if they were veering towards a very thin and blurry line.
“Maybe I’ll see if the VP needs some help with the campaign,” Donna said.
Josh laughed out loud, shaking his head, “I’d give you my job before I let you work for that half-wit,” he said, humor still laced in his voice, “No, you’re talking to CJ or Toby, we’ll find you a job that won’t be a dead end within the next year and a half.” He hoped that this is what she wanted, that she was only kidding about Bingo Bob and his election. Russel may be the only viable candidate right now, but Josh knew that there had to be someone else, anyone else really, that was more competent than him,
“Thank you, Josh,” Donna said, her voice soft, “This means a lot to me.”
“You’ve earned it, Donatella,” he said, trying to convey the emotions he felt within those words, “Seriously, I’m a great boss and I’ve molded you well.” Perhaps using humor will cushion the impact of the underlying feelings he’s clearly signaling to her.
“Yeah, you are,” was all she said, and swore he could picture the smile on her face, the one that showed all her teeth and reached her eyes; the one that made his heart do odd things in his chest.
Josh couldn’t help the smile that was tugging at his lips, and he wanted more than anything to actually be able to look at her right now, to actually see her face and how she was feeling. Phone calls would have to be enough for now, he realized, and he supposed this was better than no interaction at all.
“Alright, well I should probably get off, but we’ll talk more about this when you get back, alright?” he explained.
“I can’t wait,”...
… Josh was pissed. He had no right to be pissed, that was another thought that was stirring in his mind as he quickly dialed the numbers into his phone, but the rational part of his brain wasn't winning out today. It was a long day to begin with considering everything that could be going wrong was, he had a temp assistant until Donna came back who couldn’t be doing what needed to be done any farther from the way Donna did it, and to make matters worse, the flowers showed up. He knew this wasn’t the first time this kind of thing had happened, but it was usually him who was sending the flowers, anyway.
He heard the line connect and said, “So you have flowers waiting here for you.” He was aware enough that he could hear the disdain in his own voice; he wondered if she was questioning his tone.
“Uh, hello to you too,” she said, “You do realize that I’m still in Wisconsin, right? And it’s not April?”
He smiled slightly at the thought of her thinking it was him who was giving her the flowers, that no one else popped into her mind, but his mood was soured again by the thought that it wasn’t him who sent the flowers. “Yeah well I’m aware of where you are and what important dates are, unlike some people,” he grumbled.
“Would you, for once, maybe like to not speak in some kind of code? Just spit it out, Josh.” Her tone was starting to match his, and he could feel his heart beating a little quicker.
“Just tell your boyfriend that you’re not in this office right now, and that sending flowers to my door is interrupting my work day, which is already busy enough without some lady outright demanding I take the flowers for a girl who isn’t even in the state.”
Silence greeted him from the other side of the phone, and the only reason he knew she didn’t hang up on him because she could hear the sharp intake of her breath. He recognized that sound all too well, and was expecting to get his ass handed back to him any second now. He didn’t care, though, it was interrupting his workday and now he had to stare at these stupid flowers all day that weren’t even that great; he sends her prettier flowers every April. Besides, who was this gomer that didn’t even know what state she was in? It was just typical, and he was annoyed.
“My boyfriend?” was all she said, her words coming out sharp.
“That guy from the hospital.”
“He’s not my boyfriend,” she said, “and even if he was, why is it any of your business?”
“Well, it kinda becomes my business Donna when he’s sending flowers to me,” he muttered, “Besides, if you’re not dating, then why the hell is he sending me flowers?”
Quickly, like it was the first thing that could come to mind and there was no filter to stop her, she shot back, “You send me flowers like clockwork and you’re not my boyfriend.”
It was Josh’s turn to be stunned into silence, sucking in a breath and not responding. It wasn’t like she said anything that wasn’t true, in fact, it was just that, a fact; he was not her boyfriend and he sent her flowers. It still bothered him, though. He hated to think of the reasons that it bothered him, but he couldn’t deny the feeling that was twisting in his stomach, like those were the worst words she could have said back to him. He was annoyed with himself for even starting this conversation now. Donna could do whatever the hell she wanted because it wasn’t his position to say otherwise. Maybe he thought something shifted after she woke up in Gaza, but maybe he was just imagining the moment that had passed between the two; they were both exhausted and defeated and of course he was there for her, but that was it.
He couldn’t exactly walk his position back now, though, and act like he didn’t get mad over a guy sending his assistant flowers, which left him with: “Yeah well I’m your boss, and it doesn’t disrupt anyone’s work day when I do it.”
“Shut up, Josh,” she spit, “you spend practically hours gloating whenever you send me flowers for our anniversary,” he could practically hear the quotations around the words, “and for some reason beyond all my comprehension you do seem to care if Colin is my boyfriend or not, which he isn’t. Some people just enjoy doing nice gestures. Flowers don’t have to be some guilt mechanism to make people feel bad for leaving almost eight years ago,” Well, that one hurt, “Also, last time I checked, you aren’t going to be my boss for much longer. Unless you plan on backing yourself out of that one too.”
The line went dead as soon as she got her last word out, and he was lost in a daze for a few moments before he sighed and snapped his phone shut, placing it on his desk for him to stare at, wondering how the hell the conversation ended there. He threw his head back against his chair and groaned. He was irrationally angry when he picked up the phone and called her, a plan which the rational part of his brain knew was going to end disastrously, as it usually does when he takes his anger out on Donna, but he didn’t realize she would get that pissed; he didn’t realize she would just stop talking all together. And what the actual hell did she mean by, “unless you plan on backing yourself out of that one, too”?
“What the fuck,” he mutterd to himself, groaning again…
… Josh’s phone felt heavy in his pocket as he made his way over to CJ’s office. He hadn’t talked to Donna in eight days, the longest he’s gone without talking to her since the incident in Gaza. As soon as she landed in Wisconsin he made her call him, and when she got to her house and was settled in, and then it was just starting to be a weekly thing. They talked a couple times a week, whether it be about work or things that didn’t really matter, and it kind of felt like she was actually with him still. But then he went and exploded, like he always does, and screwed things up. He knew that she was fine and that she was safe, but he still hated that he didn’t know what was going on with her. She was supposed to start physical therapy this week, and he remembers how much he detested going, how much he despised it every time he walked out of the building; he just wanted to be there for her like she was for him. She was states away, though, and if she wanted to talk to him she would call. Bothering her was something he wasn’t going to do again.
He made his way into CJ’s office, the room in which Leo used to occupy, to find Toby and Will already there. He still wasn’t used to walking in and seeing Cj sitting in the chair that Leo once did, and Cj being the one to give them the rundown of their day. If he was being honest with himself, he pretty much thought that he was going to get the job, seeing as he was Deputy Chief of Staff. He brushed the thought off, though, trying not to delve on that fact too much or too often; he was happy with his job and what he did, and that was that.
“Well I think that it would be better if the VP was seen at the commemoration,” Will’s words pulled Josh out of his thoughts, eliciting an eye roll and a pointed look at Toby, “He’s going to be the front runner for this next election and the President has a duty-”
“Has a duty? The President doesn’t have a god damn duty to anyone except the citizens of the United States!” Josh sneered, rolling his eyes again.
“If anything, he has a duty to distance himself as far away as Bingo Bob as possible, not the other way around,” Toby added, a smirk playing on his lips.
Cj sighed loudly, but the three men ignored her, “Honestly, you two need to start showing some respect for Russel considering he’ll probably be employing all of us in a year and a half.” Will shot back.
Josh glared at Will. He wasn’t in the mood for his patronizing shit today, and since the person he would usually complain to wasn’t speaking to him, he decided to throw it all out there, “I can think of about seven million other jobs I’d take before working in a Russell White House,” he spit, “and why don’t you focus on the administration we’re currently serving under instead of trying to weasel that joke into every-”
“All of you shut up,” Cj snapped, her glare aimed at all three of the men, “This job is already difficult enough without you children arguing every time someone opens their mouth. Will, Russel has no reason to be at the commencement, drop it,” Josh’s lip twitched upward slightly, something in which Cj clearly saw, “And you two, enough already. I can’t have a senior staff meeting without this happening and I’m sick of it!”
Josh nodded, sheepishly looked around the room before saying, “Well I think you’re just doing a swell job at this incredibly difficult job Ceej!”
Her glare only strengthened, “Oh shut up,” she said, again, “All of you can leave.”
None of them needed to be told twice, all nodding their heads and turning around to walk out the door. Josh narrowly avoided another pissing contest with Will, quickly turning down the hall before he could get another word in. He didn’t feel like listing off the reasons why Bingo Bob was the biggest joke of the Democratic party, that the idea of putting him in office after Jed Bartlet was pathetic, for the hundredth time since Will started working for him.
Josh sighed, rounding the bullpen and looking at the currently empty chair that Donna once sat in. She wouldn’t be back for at least another three weeks, and the thought only soured his mood more. He needed a win today, something that didn’t involve the Vice President, and something that preferably involved kicking some Republican ass. He opened the door to his office, trudging over to his desk and sitting down in his chair. He lazily scanned the desk, eyeing a few papers that he desperately needed to glance at again and looking at the phone perched on his desk, making sure that no calls slipped through the cracks.
“Oh come on,” Josh muttered to himself, his eyebrows lifting at the sight of a missed call from the number he knew as Donna’s.
He took his phone out from his pant’s pocket and saw he had no missed calls from her. Why the hell would she call his work phone and not his cellphone? He quickly dialed her number, practically willing her to pick up.
“Hello?” she answered, and his first thought was how nice it was to hear her voice again.
“Uh, hey,” he answered, not really sure what to say, “why didn’t you call my cell? I was in senior staff.”
“Well then you wouldn’t have answered it anyway,” she said.
“I would have if I saw it was you calling,” he deadpanned, being completely honest. Even Donna yelling at him would’ve been better sitting in that meeting.
“I’m still mad at you, Josh.”
Josh raised an eyebrow, “Then why’d you call?” he asked. It was probably for the same reason that he was itching to call her for the last eight days, the fact that the two have gone almost eight years without neglecting to see the other, or at least talk to the other. Even when they had a fight, they still had to see each other because of work.
“I.. well…” she stuttered, struggling to find the words.
Josh realized he had to be the bigger one here, considering he was the asshole who picked a fight over god damn flowers. He was still curious about what the hell she meant about turning back on his word, but he could always ask that later. “Listen Donna, I’m sorry for picking some stupid fight about flowers. It was dumb and it’s none of my business if he’s your boyfriend or not.” He very clearly remembered her saying, twice in fact, that he was not, but it still wasn't his business.
“You’re right. It was stupid of you to pick a fight about flowers from a man who isn’t my boyfriend,” she said it again, he noted, “but I forgive you, mostly because I’m very bored at home and I’ve finished all my books and am sick of crappy television.”
He grinned, leaning back in his chair, “Ah, so I’m, what is that, third? Yeah, I’m third in the list of things to keep Donnatella Moss occupied in recovery.”
She laughed, “Well you were first, but after the stunt you pulled last week you’re gonna need to work to put yourself back up there.”
He chuckled, shaking his head, trying not to think of the way his cheeks burned when she told him he was previously first on her list, “That seems fair,” he said,
“I know something that would get you pretty high on my list,” she said.
“Oh yeah?”
“Well I had my first PT today-”
“That was today? Damn, now I’m really sorry I didn’t call first. How was it? Are you okay?” he cut her off, knowingly shooting a million questions at her but too concerned to care.
“It’s fine, Josh, I told you all is forgiven,” she said, “but it, you know, sucked. It was a couple hours ago so I’m feeling refreshed again but I know why you complained so much now.”
He wished more than anything she didn’t have to know what that felt like, but there was nothing he could about that right now, so landed on humor instead, “Oh so you admit I wasn’t just being dramatic?’
Oh how he could see her eyes rolling as she said, “No Joshua, you are always dramatic,” she muttered, “I didn’t throw a glass cup across the room after my first session.”
He smiled sheepishly to himself, recalling the theatrics Donna witnessed after his first PT session, “Whatever,” he grumbled, “so what’s the favor I can do for you?”
“Three weeks from today my plane will arrive at the Ronald Reagan National Airport at 2:30 pm. I will be in a wheelchair and therefore unable to drive, do you think it would be possible for you to pick me up?”
The grin on his face somehow expanded at the thought of Donna coming back, and he didn’t have to think twice before saying, “Obviously I’ll pick you up. Three weeks isn’t too bad.”
“It’s going to drag on and on,” she complained.
“Be that as it may, I’ll be picking you up from the airport before you know it.”
He had to try very hard to conceal what was probably a very stupid smile tugging on his lips for the remainder of the day…
…. Josh was going to kill whoever was calling him. He was going to take his bare hands and squeeze them around whoever’s throat it is who decided to call him in the middle of the night. He knew it was the middle of the night because he only crashed onto his bed about an hour ago after Leo all but kicked Josh out of the doors of the White House. His phone was still ringing, and he groaned when he finally lifted his head and saw the clock read 3:03 A.M.
He fumbled for the phone, lifting it off the receiver and pressing it against his ear, “What?” he grumbled, his voice thick with sleep.
Josh heard a sniffle on the other end of the phone and immediately sat up in bed, suddenly very alert, “Donna?” he asked. He didn’t know anyone else who would call him at this hour and be crying into the phone, and he didn’t know what was going on but his insides suddenly felt twisted up.
“Sorry for calling this late,” she practically whispered, “I know you need to be up in like three hours and you probably just got back in and-”
“Hey, hey, I don’t care about any of that, what’s wrong? Did something happen?” Josh asked, running a head through his hair.
She sighed, “I keep having nightmares,” Josh’s stomach dropped, only imagining where this was going, “and my physical therapist says it’s only natural, that it’ll go away after a little while… but then I think of you. You’re the only person I really want to talk to about this.”
“Donna,” Josh breathes, “Why didn’t you come to me before about this? You know I don’t care about what time it is, right? If you can’t sleep or you’re remembering things you call me whenever. I mean it, okay? I don’t care if it’s four in the morning or six at night. I’ll walk out of any meeting or debate or whatever.” He meant it, too. He remembered exactly how it felt to feel that pain in your sleep, to feel like breathing isn’t possible and the screams. All he wanted was to actually be there for her, like she was for him.
“I don’t even really remember anything,” she said, “I just keep dreaming of explosions and it’s almost like I can feel the pain in my leg,” her voice was still watery, and he could tell she was trying to stop the tears.
“It’ll go away, Donna, I swear,” Josh said, “I almost never dream like that anymore. It’ll get better,” he tried his best to soothe her over the phone.
“Almost never?” Donna asked.
He rolled his eyes, “This isn’t about me, this is about you,” he said, “You know I’m serious about what I said, though, right?” She didn’t say anything, and he needed to know that she understood how serious he was about this.
“Josh, I’m not going to call you every time this happens. I just… I needed to hear your voice tonight. It helped.”
The rational part of Josh’s brain wasn’t functioning as well as it usually does, the lack of sleep and worry over Donna overpowering anything professional he should be thinking, and erasing any lines that probably should be drawn. He couldn’t find it within himself to care right now, though. Above anything else, she was his best friend, the person who knew him better than anyone else, the person who he trusted more than his life. It was with that mindset that he said: “Yeah, because as soon as you get back here I’m camping out at your apartment. Actually, you can come to mine since you have a roommate with that pesky cat. I’m not letting you go through this alone, Donnatella.”
He heard her breath hitch on the other end of the line, and his eyebrows shot up. Did he make her upset? Did he finally do it and cross a line that was just too much for her? Fuck.
“I can’t stay at your apartment,” Donna said, her voice wavering again as she stopped his train of thought, “Imagine how that will look, Josh.”
Josh scoffed, “I don’t give a damn how it’ll look. You’re my priority right now, especially now that I know you’re going through this,” he argued, “Besides, you were there for me when I was going through my shit. Why shouldn't I be there for you?”
“So you think me moving in with you right before you promote me in my job is a good idea?” Donna asked, and then added, “a good idea logistically that is.”
Josh chewed the inside of his cheek, understanding where Donna was coming from but hated what she was insinuating anyway. He knew that she was right, that it looked like a scandal just waiting to happen, even if he just wanted to be there for someone who was there for him; even if what he was trying so hard not to feel for Donna was anything but scandalous. He sighed, “Okay, you’re right.”
“I usually am, Joshua,” she quipped, her voice sounding a little more like it usually does, “that’s still one of the sweetest things you, or anyone for that matter, has ever offered me.”
“I’m still checking on you… a lot,” Josh promised, his tone hopefully insinuating that it wasn’t up for debate, “I know a thing or two about trauma so… there’s really no one else better for the job,” there, he thought, an appropriate justification.
She chuckled, “Not even a licensed therapist?”
Josh grinned, “Nah,” he answered, “plus I’m better company.”
“I don’t know, I’d have to pay both you and a therapist to shut up and let me talk,” she jabbed, and Josh laughed loudly, just glad to hear the jovial tone returned to her words.
“Well if you’re just gonna sit here and bitch, Donnatella….” Josh grumbled lightheartedly, very clearly not complaining much.
She yawned, and then sighed, “I don’t know if I can go back to bed,” she admitted suddenly, shifting the conversation back to her sleep again.
Josh understood that too. The idea of going back to bed after he had just woken up from a nightmare wasn’t something he ever enjoyed. In fact, the only way that he actually got back to sleep was when Donna ended up crawling into bed next to him, eventually. Once the pair realized that was what worked, they rolled with it; it wasn’t professional, but it also wasn't awkward, and never felt weird or like it was crossing a line. That’s when he started to realize… well, everything. They didn’t talk about it even during or after the fact, just understood that this was the only thing that made him feel safe again. At the moment, he tried not to dwell too hard on why that was, but after everything that just happened, it was hard to ignore the feeling bubbling inside him again.
“What if I, uh, stay on the line?” he suggested timidly, a little afraid to sound dumb, or be rejected, “You were the only thing that helped me go back to sleep and, uh, if I could help even a little…” he trailed off, hoping she would get the picture.
“That’d be nice.”
Josh smiled, “Goodnight then, Donnatella.”
He could hear the rustling on the other end of the phone, and he imagined she was settling herself under the covers and resting her head on her pillow; he wished he could be with her, but like everything else, this would have to do for now. “Goodnight, Joshua.”...
… “This place is too crowded,” Josh grumbled into the receiver of his phone, practically pushing through swarms of strangers just so he could get to the next gate.
“It’s an airport Josh, what did you expect?” she said, and he’d be lying if hearing all those people in the back didn’t send some sort of electrical feeling up his spine. They were, for the first time in weeks, in the same building, and he was actually about to see her. The thought of that alone almost subdued his annoyance over the sheer amount of people here on a Wednesday afternoon. Almost.
“I expected it to be less crowded on a Wednesday afternoon so I could actually get to you in a decent amount of time,” he muttered, “Do you think if I wore a sign that said ‘Deputy Chief of Staff’ on it I’d get special treatment?”
She scoffed, “If by special treatment you mean some angry Republican will find you and spit on you, then yes.”
He grinned, his eyes flicking upwards towards the signs, “What the hell is your gate again?” Josh asked, “32A?”
“32B…”
“WHAT?” Josh hollard, stopping dead in his tracks and definitely getting looks from some passers. He looked at the gate signs again, confirming that he was in the A section of the airport and not the B. He wanted to punch a wall, this was ridiculous, “Come on! Why aren’t these goddamn buildings mapped out better. I swear to God the next legislation we get passed is going towards abolishing-” he stopped talking when he heard her giggling on the other end of the phone, and he was slowly starting to think she was fucking with him. He was going to kill her.
“You’re screwing with me, right?” he deadpanned.
“Yes, but only because you’re about seven feet away and you haven't noticed me because you’ve been so concerned with how walking through here was annoying you, and I wanted to see your reaction firsthand.”
Josh spun around again, his eyes searching frantically for Donna. He scanned in front of him, making sure once again that he was actually at the correct gate, which he now knew he was. He walked a few feet closer to the sign and kept searching, until his eyes finally landed on the blonde. She had a smile on her face, the one she wore that showed all her teeth and made his heart do unsettling things, and she was sitting in his wheelchair just waiting for him.
They both snapped their phones shut at the same time, and the grin on Josh’s face surely matched hers as he made his way over to where she was sitting, feeling worlds better than he had in weeks….
…. Josh was pretty sure he’s never been this happy. Well, he knew there were times that he was equally as happy as he was now, but this surely made his list. Donna was sitting in front of him, resting on the bed in the room in her apartment, her legs sprawled out while she leaned against a pillow he propped up for her. She was smiling at him, still beaming practically, and he was sitting on the other side of her bed, little space between them. He wanted to just reach out and hold her hand, but he willed himself to calm down a little; she just came back to him, there was no need for him to scare her off suddenly.
“Are you sure you don’t need to be in the office?” Donna asked, yet again.
He rolled his eyes, “No, for the third time,” he said, “Jeez, you want me to leave or something?”
“No, no,” she said quickly, “I just don’t want you to miss anything important because you’re holed up here with me.”
Josh had to fight the urge to roll his eyes again. There was literally nowhere else he’d rather be at the moment, something which he figured would have been obvious considering the enthusiasm he’s shown over the last weeks over actually getting to see her, “Donna. Shut up,” he said, a small smile tugging on his lips, “I don’t want to be anywhere else, seriously.” another thought popped into his mind, “Besides, you stayed at my apartment for basically three months straight, seven days a week after I was injured. I’ll stay here as long as you want me.”
A blush crept up her face, and she ducked her head a little in an effort to hide the fact; it was unsuccessful, and he smiled a little more, “You keep saying that,” she said softly.
Screw it, he thought, and reached for her hand, squeezing it slightly, “And I mean it.” he said. He was realizing that they were slipping into an all too familiar territory, and soon enough one of them would crack a joke or shake the other off, and things would return to how they were the majority of the time. He smiled at her when a sudden thought popped into his mind, and he knew he had to ask her, “Wait a second, remember when you were mad at me a few weeks ago?”
She narrowed her eyes slightly, and Josh started to wonder if this was one of his dumber ideas, “Vividly.” she said.
He chuckled, “Yes I’m still an idiot, I know. You were the one who promised all was forgiven if I picked you up and…” he trailed off, making a motion with his hands of the scene in front of him, “anyway, you said something and I was curious.”
She rolled her eyes, “I was mad Josh, I said a lot of things. Don’t even worry about it.”
“You said something about walking back on your new job possibilities too . Emphasis on too. What the hell else did I back out of?” He explained.
Her eyes widened a little before she quickly attempted to regain composure. She clearly knew what he was talking about, but all she said was, “It doesn’t matter, Josh.”
He shrugged his shoulders, “Well it does if I was an asshole and turned my back on you for something, Donna. Seriously, what was it?”
“You weren’t an asshole Josh, I was just… reading too much into things. It seriously doesn’t matter.”
Reading too much into things? His heart started to speed up a little, thumping against his chest wildly. He could only really think of one thing that she would even have to read into, which was him flying half way across the world to be at her side in Germany, and while he tried not to even admit to himself that there was anything to read into, if she felt a certain way then all bets were off. “What did you think you were reading into?”
She sighed, “Damn it, Josh. You flew all the way to Germany and stood at my bedside for a week. I asked to see you, not… not anyone else before I thought I was going to die,” an actual shudder passed through Josh’s body at the thought. If she noticed, she just kept going, “and then when I woke up, I thought… it was dumb, clearly. I thought there we had a moment.”
“Donna-”
“No, it’s fine. We’re close friends and I’m your assistant and you probably felt unnecessarily guilty about the entire situation so you hopped on a plane-”
It was Josh’s turn to interrupt Donna, but only so he could finally do what he should’ve done the moment she woke up in Germany; the moment he knew that she would be okay and was coming back to him. He slowly moved towards her, putting his hand gently around the side of her face and gauging her reaction. When she didn’t flinch, or push him away, he took that as a sign and leaned in, pressing his lips against hers.
He had, despite his greatest efforts, imagined a million ways in which this could happen over the years; a quick kiss while she was rambling, pushing her against his office wall frantically, slowly kissing her at any chance he got. This was everything he wanted and more, everything he tried to imagine throughout the last six years, but nothing he could actually ever believe. Her lips moved against his slowly, and he tangled his hand through her hair, trying to somehow pull her closer to him; as close as he could get without jostling her leg or moving her uncomfortably. Her lips parted slightly, her tongue trailing along his bottom lip, tugging gently at it, and he couldn’t help the low, “Donna” that escaped from his lips.
He could feel the smile on her face, and pulled away for a moment to actually look at her. She was grinning widely, and Josh wanted nothing more but to kiss her again. First, though, he had to let her know she wasn’t imagining anything, “Donna,” he said, “you weren’t reading into anything. There was a moment, and I chickened out because I saw that Irish gomer walk in and… and I should’ve done that weeks ago.”
She nodded, a smirk suddenly crossing her face, “You should’ve done that years ago.”
His eyebrows raised, and he was pretty sure his face was the equivalent of a deer caught in headlights, “I… years ago!” he exclaimed, “why didn’t you tell me!”
She laughed, throwing her head back and grinning wider, “It’s okay, Joshua. You’re here now,” she said, “we’re gonna have some stuff to talk about, though.”
He nodded, “Like how I’m promoting my assistant because we’ve suddenly started a torrid and passionate love affair?” He couldn’t even get through the sentence without cracking a smile, and she took the pillow from the bottom of the bed to whack him against his side.
“Like how your assistant quit because she finally decided she couldn’t handle his stupidity,” she deadpanned.
He chuckled, resting his hand against hers, “We’ll talk about it all,” he said, “and I’ll talk to Cj and Toby and we’ll figure that part out too. I’m not messing around about this.”
She smiled, “Neither am I.”
He figured that they had plenty of time to talk about things, and that nothing had to be set in stone at this moment; they both clearly wanted this, whatever it was, and knew that this was what they both wanted. With that thought, the idea of Donna being his, and not just in a professional way, he leaned in again, deciding that there would never be a day again that he would be able to go without his lips pressed against Donnatella's.