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Published:
2021-03-18
Updated:
2021-05-23
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2/?
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Disaster Dad of the Year

Summary:

When Clark Kent met Brandon Breyer, he did not expect him to have powers similiar to his. Or have a mission to take over the world. So of course, he pulls a Batman and “adopts” him in hopes to change his psychotic ways. However, Superboy was not part of the plan. Life for Clark has just become even more chaotic as a new father.

Chapter Text

Clark Kent, aka Superman, was not amused. 

 

First of all, what the hell was Lex Luthor thinking in cloning him? In this situation, Clark was confident he was allowed to curse. He had never felt so violated! Wait, by using his DNA without his permission, would that count as… would that mean…? 

 

Outwardly, he showed a neutral front but inwardly he was screaming in horror. Oh Rao, why did fate hate him so much? But then another thought popped into his head and he froze (inwardly of course) as it suddenly hit him. Oh dear, even if he had felt like taking him under his wing, it was impossible. He can’t. He couldn’t. There’s no way this would end well. 

 

He snapped out of his thoughts just as Robin, Kid Flash, and Aqualad began to speak up for his… clone. Just the thought of it had him mentally groan. He sent an apologetic message to Martian Manhunter as he remembered he could hear his thoughts and emotions. He did not mean to overwhelm him with his feelings over this shocking development.

 

He was so screwed. 

 

Focus, he thought to himself and reeled himself back into the conversation and no, no, no, no, no, no! Look away, his subconscious screamed as he suddenly met the clone’s hopeful gaze- and okay that’s just rude, even for him- Superboy’s hopeful gaze, pulling at his heartstrings. But he couldn’t. 

 

As Superman talked to some of his fellow superhero friends, he felt someone’s gaze burn a hole in his head. Thinking that thought had him wincing as he suddenly remembered the incident that happened last week when a certain someone threw a tantrum. He briefly looked back at Superboy and would you look at that, it was time for him to go. 

 

“Today has certainly been full of surprises,” he commented. “But it’s already late and I must be going. Farewell men.” 

 

After giving a few brief goodbyes, Superman was off and ignoring the young man who he had left behind. Sorry Superboy but it’ll be impossible to take care of you for now. And not just because he contained some of his stolen DNA along with the DNA of his worst enemy- Wait but then there’s Doomsday- ok, second worst enemy. Nope, at least not completely. In fact, now that he thought about it, he had to run to the store to pick up a few things unless he wanted to deal with another tantrum tonight. 


As soon as Clark opened the door to his small apartment, he was met with a surprise hug as a young boy attached himself to his waist. He let out a small ‘oof’ and awkwardly patted him on the back with one hand while juggling with the groceries on the other. He used his foot to close the door. 

 

“Hey Brandon,” he greeted lamely, “Can you please help me put away the groceries?” The younger male nodded and floated a few inches off the floor, grabbing two bags on top and flying into the kitchen. Clark glanced at his window and was relieved to see the curtains drawn. He then proceeded to walk into the kitchen and asked “So how was your day?” 

 

“Boring,” the other huffed moodily. “How much longer do I have to hide? It’s already been weeks since I’ve done anything!” Brandon complained as he telekinetically moved frozen foods into the fridge all while levitating in the air, arms crossed. 

 

Clark snapped his attention back at him and said sharply, “You mean injuring and killing innocent people?” Brandon glared at him, eyes reddening. “Brandon, we’ve been over this and quite frankly I’m starting to get tired of it. Until it’s safe for you to reveal yourself, the League can’t discover your existence. I already know one person who knows and we’re lucky enough that he’s understanding of your situation. Though I suppose that might be because he’s an alien. ” He tilted his head slightly as he attempted to figure out why Martian Manhunter hadn't said anything. 

 

“My situation,” Brandon scoffed. “Those people are nothing compared to me. They only care about themselves,” he muttered darkly, the kitchen shaking slightly. Clark’s eyes widened and he enveloped the other in a hug.

 

“Hey, calm down. Look, I’m sorry about bringing it up. It’s just,” he paused as he thought on how to phrase the fact that Superman may possibly have a son without making Brandon feel hostile at the thought of sharing him with anyone else, “It’s been a rough day,” Clark finished. He rocked Brandon slightly, patting his hair a few times. He listed to Brandon’s heartbeat level out and gently pulled away. “We can talk about you going out another day but right now, let’s just prepare dinner, okay?” He waited until Brandon finally looked at him and nodded, a sullen look on his face. 

 

“Hey cheer up,” he laughed playfully, “I’m making apple pie tonight and there’s definitely enough for tomorrow too.” He walked up to the sink and washed his hands, ready to get busy. Brandon appeared at his side in a flash and pressed against his side, face conflicted. 

 

Yep, Clark thought to himself, he definitely shouldn’t mention Superboy to him. Not unless he wanted someone’s death on his hands. He was already having trouble secretly taking care of him, and especially hiding him away from Batman. He couldn’t risk anybody taking away the slightly psychotic killer alien child from him. 

Chapter 2: Chapter One: Trying

Summary:

The struggles of trying to raise an alien boy might be his greatest challenge yet.

Chapter Text

Parental Guide: 5 Ways To Teach Your Child Empathy 

 

Clark stared blankly at his screen, wondering if this was a good idea. Then again, his ideas haven’t been all that great lately. He winced as he recalled the last JL meeting he attended a few days ago. There had been a lot of arguing, screaming, broken furniture, and interestingly enough, tears. They had stopped, of course, when all of their emotions had risen high enough to cause Martian Manhunter to pass out. He still remembered the look of disappointment Batman had shot at him as he walked out the door. 

 

He sighed in frustration and just clicked on the title. Even if it might backfire on him, it was still worth a try. And it was time he let Brandon out, even if for one night. Though of course he had to be careful as so many things could go wrong. Such as Brandon suddenly deciding to go back to destroying humanity. Or one of League members suddenly popping up out of nowhere to chastise him over his behavior with Superboy. 

 

Thinking of the boy made him feel a pang of guilt. Along with fear and disgust. Sure, the others made a good point that it was his responsibility to take care of him but has anybody truly asked him how he felt about this? Nobody! Excuse him for freaking out over the existence of someone sharing the DNA of him and Luthor. Oh Rao, they basically had a son! One that made him feel… violated? Ugh, he suddenly had the urge to yank his hair out. He decided to ignore Superboy’s existence for now until later on. 

 

Right now, he needed to make plans for tonight. Clark glanced at his desktop. After he talked to Lois about the upcoming gala. He was not ready to be anywhere near him without the urge to punch him and his stupid condescending smirk. What was the man thinking? 


  1. Get to know your child. Engage in a conversation. Go from there. 

 

He wondered if Batman did this with Robin. He snorted at the thought as he considered their previous conversations. But maybe that was their special way of communicating. 

 

Clark entered his apartment as he took off his oversized jacket. He closed the door behind him as he hung it up and glanced around. He had managed to finish his report before the deadline and had gotten out of work early. 

 

“Brandon?” He called out as he headed to the kitchen, checking to see how much food was left. As he opened the fridge, he pondered over taking Brandon with him. The nearest store was only a few blocks away and not many people frequented there at this hour. As he contemplated, he heard quiet footsteps walking towards him. Expecting it at this point, he turned around and opened his arms as the small boy ran into his arms. “Hey buddy,” he laughed and rubbed his head, noticing it was wet. 

 

“You’re early,” Brandon said quietly as he looked away, instinctively attaching himself to his side. He closed the fridge door with a frown. 

 

“I finished work earlier than expected,” Clark shrugged before remembering the pamphlet. “So how was your day?” 

 

Brandon looked at him, “I watched the birds nest outside my room.” Yes, Clark did own a small apartment which consisted of the living room merged with the kitchen, one bathroom, and one room. And because his parents raised him with good manners, he had Brandon stay in his old room while he slept on the couch. At first they had tried to sleep on the same bed but due to his hero activities, both would wake up in the middle of the night, with a sleep deprived super child raging at him in the morning. He had to use his sick days for work all while trying to attend JL meetings during that time. In the aftermath, Clark decided it was better sleeping on the couch. “I watched a hawk fly off with two of the hatchlings. The last one died jumping off its nest. I think the mother’s grieving right now. If she’s not dead anyway.” 

 

Um, where did he go from there? Clark blinked and stupidly asked, “And how did that make you feel?” Brandon narrowed his eyes at him, “The strong will always rule the weak.”

 

Clark stared. “Rise of the Morningstar?” 

 

Brandon nodded. 

 

“Anything else?” 

 

“The baby bird reminded me of my mom. She fell from the sky.” 

 

Clark blinked. The pamphlet did not cover that. He patted him on the back awkwardly. “I’m sorry,” he said honestly. Based on what he pried from him, the events leading up to her death had not been pleasant.

 

Going alone it is. 


  1. Help your child understand the world does not revolve around them.

 

After their conversation ended, Clark had cooked dinner and both were currently sitting across from each other, bowls in front of them. The sound of spoons clinking against the marble basically echoed around the room. 

 

Brandon just ate sullenly, eyes not so subtly eyeing the door. Clark sighed quietly, wondering how he’d go about with step two. 

 

“Would you like to do anything?” Clark inwardly cringed at just how awkward he sounded. One would think after weeks of living with him, he’d be able to act natural around him. But how many can say they had to take care of an alien child in the middle of puberty? Especially with destructive powers. Maybe he should stop trying to justify just how bad he is at this. Why is it so much easier to deal with other children than Brandon? 

 

“Can we watch something?” Brandon peered up at him. “If you’re not busy.” Now that had Clark visibly wince as memories flooded his brain. Almost every time he tried to spend some time with him, something always came up. He shot him a guilty smile and agreed to his request. 

 

Maybe he should handle step 2 and 3 together. The problem was what to watch.


  1. Discuss ethical dilemmas. 

Clark cursed at him, wondering what in the world he was thinking of playing Lilo and Stitch. He clearly overestimated how messed up Brandon’s mind was if his new sketches had anything to say about it. 

 

He turned slightly and peeked at one of Brandon’s drawings, paling as he saw Superman as Jumba and Brandon as Stitch. And not the good versions. Look at the bright side, he told himself, desperate to find any good thing that happened from watching this movie. Brandon had stopped drawing that message that he’d obsessively keep drawing. At first he hadn’t recognize the meaning of the symbol but after scanning it at the Fortress of Solitude, he realized that Brandon’s species was related to Kryptonians. Still, so much for Disney movies being kid-friendly, he thought glumly. 

 

Wait. He’d been allowing Brandon to watch television as a way to pass boredom but just what exactly did he watch during that time? Wide-eyed, he stared at Brandon and decided that next time definitely he would add step 2 and 3 to step 4. And no more alien movies, kid friendly or not.


  1. Help them develop self-control and manage their feelings. 

 

It was nighttime and Clark was in Brandon’s room, ready to finish the day with some progress. Though technically he kind of did, he thought. Let’s just get this over with. 

 

“So Brandon,” he smiled down at him, “What do you want to do tomorrow?” Oddly enough, he’d been given the day off for some unknown reason. However he was willing to use his free time to hang out with Brandon. Said person looked at him with dead eyes and eyebrows furrowed. A flash of blue eyes, feelings of longing and swimming in them, suddenly flashed in mind and he reeled back in shock. 

 

“What’s wrong?” Clark felt a hand wrap around his wrist and pushed those memories to the side, desiring to forget all about him for the moment despite something swelling in his chest. Not literally of course. Shooting the boy a weak smile, he shook his head and asked him once again what he wanted to do tomorrow. Brandon analyzed him carefully, curious evident on his face. He seemed to have come up with some sort of conclusion because he pulled Clark into bed and burrowed himself to his side.

 

“I want to go out,” Brandon said blankly as he stared into the dark room. “I’m tired of being cooped up in here. I feel like I’m going crazy.” 

 

“I’m sorry,” he replied, guilt leaking into his voice. “I know this isn’t ideal, forcing you to hide and all.” 

 

“Superman has his own personal home, the Fortress of Solitude or something like that. Why don’t you just take me there?” At this point, he sounded like a petulant child. Clark cracked a smile at how Brandon was acting like a normal kid. 

 

“I can’t. Not yet anyway. There are things I have to fix before you can even go,” Clark responded vaguely. He wasn’t lying when he said he couldn’t take Brandon there. Interestingly enough, the fortress was able to recognize Brandon as an enemy and was acting strange once it had finished scanning the remains of his ship. Clark still found it fascinating how he was only able to be hurt by its metal. Sure beat a radioactive rock. 

 

“You promised,” now he was sulking, crossing his arms as he looked away from. “You said you’d help me but how is keeping locked up in here helping me?” The room shook as the bed lamp shattered into the ground. Clark sent him an annoyed look, Brandon returning it with a glare. 

 

Sighing, he pinched his nose and placed a hand on his shoulder. “If I allow you to go outside, will you behave?” A nod followed. “Follow any orders I give out?” Nod. “Won’t fly out of sight?” Nod. 

 

“Alright,” he said calmly even though inside, he was the opposite of calm. “Behave well tomorrow and I might consider letting you out more often.” 

 

“Really?” His voice picked up. Clark gave his a pained look and nodded reluctantly. “Ok I‘ll be good.” 

 

Great. 


  1. Get to know your child. Engage in a conversation. Go from there. - ?

 

  1. Help your child understand the world does not revolve around them. 

 

  1. Discuss ethical dilemmas. 

 

  1. Help them develop self-control and manage their feelings. - ?

 

  1. Identify feelings. - ?

 

Clark listened to the soft snoring of Brandon lying right next to as he mulled over his thoughts. What had he been thinking, agreeing to letting Brandon out?! 

 

No, no, no! He had this under control. All he had to do was keep a close eye on him, avoid being caught on camera, make sure not to bump into the Justice League or Young Justice, possibly teach Brandon how to control his powers, and ensure that they weren’t pulled into a crime less Brandon decides to play executioner. 

 

Yeah, totally under control. Clark covered his face with his hand and let out a muffled groan, dreading morning. Tomorrow was going to be a disaster.