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But he did know that he didn’t want to be alone anymore,
So, he got up from his bed and walked out of his room,
Temporarily abandoning all his items for a change in scenery,
As Joakim quietly descended the stairs he found that the living room downstairs was completely abandoned, not a single soul in sight, which made him sigh,
Yes, he didn’t want to be alone but he didn’t feel emotional well enough to deal with others, so perhaps, instead of being stuck in his room alone, he could now be in the living room and hopefully cheer himself up with something,
After all, the living room had the gaming console that Tommy had bought five weeks ago, and there were twenty different games to choose from!
Surely one of them would pique his interest?
As Joakim walked into the living room, he approached the gaming console,
His finger hovered over the power-on button, but he didn’t do anything, instead, he just stood there, motionless…
He looked down at the console and hesitated,
He knew that if he powered it on, someone would hear and would want to come to play with him, and since he wasn’t feeling all like himself he didn’t want to upset anyone with his attitude,
So, instead, he decided not to turn it on, instead, the warm large couch, which was big enough for two people called to him,
Its large plush pillows were very tempting to rest his head on,
Perhaps he could sleep on the couch for a while,
Rest and recharge his internal battery,
Hmm…
Yeah, that sounded very nice…
Joakim made his way over to the couch and took off his shoes, as he crawled on top of the large couch, he eventually settled down on a spot he quite liked and laid down,
He sighed happily,
He was comfortable as he had one pillow tucked under his head and the other wrapped around his arms, they were very soft and fluffy which made him smile, he distinctly remembers going with Pär to a local Ikea and buying them,
He remembers having way too much fun in the pillow section, there were so many colors, sizes, designs, and textures to choose from! How could he just simply choose one?
Impossible, he had to spend a careful amount of time narrowing down his choices to the ones he found to be of top-tier quality,
Joakim found himself smiling softly at the lovely memory, however, he still wasn’t feeling like himself, today wasn’t a good day for him, well with the holiday and all…
Joakim let out a soft groan as he tried to relax further and hopefully doze off until he heard nearby footsteps, he lightly tensed up and acted like he was asleep, closing his eyes and listening for where the person walked,
The footsteps stopped,
He lightly relaxed until they started up again, the sound of them approaching grew louder and louder, until-
“Oh, h-“ It was Pär and he had stopped speaking, had he perhaps noticed him?
Silence,
“Y’know I can tell you’re not asleep, right?” Pär asked, and Joakim could tell he was smiling as he said that,
He sighed, “I was hoping that I’d be able to fool you…”
Pär chuckled, “Well, nice try… I’ll give you that!” he replied,
Instead of the expected laughter from Joakim, all Pär got was silence,
Something is off… Pär can feel it,
“…Hey…” Pär started, his voice gentle and soft, “…Are you ok? Something wrong?”
Joakim only buried his face in the pillow his head rested on, he didn’t feel like talking and hoped that his lack of co-operation would deter him from pressing further,
Pär frowned, “Joakim? Come on… what’s wrong? Why won’t you talk to me?”
Silence,
“Please?”
More silence,
“Joakim I-“ Pär grunted, and then his footsteps where heard receding from him, which made Joakim lightly relax,
He could already feel tears prick at the corners of his eyes,
He didn’t want Pär seeing him cry,
After all h-
‘THUMP’
Something large and soft was dropped onto Joakim, he grunted as he laid there and tried to move it away from his face,
When he was able to see again, he noticed that it was the large fleece blanket that Pär had bought,
“Wh-?” Joakim saw Pär crawl on top of the large couch and make his way over to him,
Joakim panicked and hid his face under the covers like a child to avoid having Pär see just how upset he was,
Finally, Pär settled next to him, he was laying on the couch with his back propped up with the help of some pillows,
“It’s fine, you don’t have to talk…” Pär spoke up, and wasn’t surprised when Joakim didn’t reply back,
“…Joakim?”
Silence,
Pär sighed, “…Do you remember when we first met?”
Silence,
“…You know, I wasn’t kidding when I told you that you wouldn’t suffer any more if you came to live with us…”
Joakim shuffled, he seemed to curl in on himself,
Pär gently reached over and rubbed his back with his hand, “…I’ve tried to build this place to be a safe haven for us immortals, it-“ he sighed, “-It’s hard out there, I should know that, and I also know that it’s especially hard when you’re alone…” he explained,
“But you’re not alone… you know that, right?” he asked as he looked over to the curled form next to him, Joakim was still hidden under the large blanket,
He saw what he could only interpret as him nodding, but what Pär didn’t expect was for the response to be followed by a half-chocked out a sob,
“J- J-Joakim? Are you ok?” he asked him,
“…N-N-No…” came the meek, almost quiet reply,
Pär almost didn’t hear him,
“Hey, easy… there’s no need to cry, what’s gotten you so upset, hmm?” he asked,
Instead, he didn’t get a reply as he watched Joakim move the covers away from his face, he saw the man’s pink cheeks and eyes as tears streamed down,
Pär wordlessly reached out and wiped away the tears, he could feel Joakim lean into his touch and he frowned deeply,
Something had upset his boy, and he wasn’t too happy with knowing that piece of information,
“Come here…” he said as he pulled Joakim towards him initially for a hug, but Joakim settled on getting close and laying his head on his chest and hugging him from there,
Joakim couldn’t hold it in anymore,
He allowed a sob to escape his lips as it wracked his body, he cried hard onto his friend’s chest effectively ruining his shirt,
But Pär could care less about his shirt, right now his boy was his biggest priority,
“That’s right, just let it all out… I won’t ask you what’s upset you, just cry it all out… I’ll be here supporting you all the way…” he replied,
And it seemed that that was all that Joakim needed,
He didn’t care anymore of who heard him, he allowed his sobs to escape his lips,
Sorrowful gut-wrenching cries filled the air as he silently lamented over the loss of his father, over how the one man in his life who was supposed to be there for him,
To be his rock,
His support,
To be the one who would raise him to be the man he needed to be had left him, his dead mother and forgotten sibling,
He truly had no one in this world,
His father abandoned him and his family,
His mother died of old age,
And his sibling, who he had a fight with, never reached out to him after their argument,
He was alone,
That he knew…
Pär laid there on the large couch and he sadly watched on as Joakim shook and trembled under him like a leaf in the autumn wind,
With one arm wrapped around him to help keep Joakim grounded to reality, he used his other one to wipe Joakim’s seemingly endless stream of tears as he whispered sweet nothings to him,
Pär filled the air around him and Joakim with words of comfort,
Of love,
Of security,
And of safety,
Whatever it was that was plaguing his boy, he didn’t know… but what he did know was that he would always be at his side and his love for him was endless and bottomless,
Not even the Kola Superdeep Borehole could even begin to compete with just how deep his love ran for Joakim,
So, as he held him he gently hummed a tune of old,
One from when he was but a wee babe, a song that was sung by his mother, it was filled with the love that only a mother could give,
That only a parent could give…
Two hours later, after finally getting the last bits of sorrow out of himself, Joakim laid on the couch snuggled up close to Pär and still fast asleep,
He had worn himself out with his crying and needed to rest in order to gain his strength back,
Pär was more than fine with that as he too was passed out cold on the couch, his head lolled over to the side as he slept,
Eventually, Pär woke himself up and he felt incredibly well-rested, he half stretched as he looked down at Joakim who still slept,
He quietly chuckled and smiled softly as he watched him, gently he caressed his back and saw him smile in his sleep,
As Pär silently laid there, he glanced over to a clock that hung on the wall, it read: 2:35 PM,
‘Oh… it’s late…’ Pär thought as he looked down at Joakim, before another thought came to his head, the sound of footsteps behind him alerted him to the presence of one of the other boys,
He thought that the footsteps sounded very similar to Hannes’ and it turned out that he was right when Hannes came into view,
Both men quietly waved at each other, Hannes looked down at the sleeping Joakim and then back at Pär,
He mouthed the words, [WHAT HAPPENED?]
Pär quietly sighed, with one hand he traced a tear down both cheeks and made a sad expression,
Hannes nodded, [OH, HE OK NOW?] he asked
Pär nodded, [I THINK SO]
Hannes looked over to the same clock in the room and then back at Pär, he pointed to Joakim, [HE WAKE UP, TOO LATE]
Pär nodded, he turned his attention to Joakim, “Joakim….Joakiiim…” he softly sing-song to the male that lay sleeping, curled next to him,
He watched him stir lightly, “Wake up Joakim… it's late…”
A soft whine, “…no…”
Hannes chuckled, “Come on, bud, wake up…” he pleaded with his friend,
A groan, “…Do I ‘ave to…?” he slightly slurred, clearly still groggy and tired,
Hand hummed, “Mhm… a- hey... if you wake up I’ll make you your favorite…” he suggested,
That seemed to pique his interest and he opened his eyes, sleepily rubbing at them, “Strawberry pancakes?” he asked,
“With extra whipped cream…” added Hannes, and watched as Joakim smiled wide,
“…Okay…” he gave a sleepy reply as he stretched,
Pär happily sighed and turned to Hannes, he mouthed [THANK YOU] and Hannes only nodded before leaving to go make Joakim’s favorite breakfast item,
As Pär watched as Joakim stretched himself out like a cat, he yawned as he did so, part of himself expected to see canines, a tail, and some matching cat ears on Joakim for a moment there,
‘How cute…’ he smiled to himself,
Joakim saw Pär’s smile and he gave one of his own to him, ‘What’s so funny, hm?” he asked,
Pär chuckled, “Nothing…”
Joakim frowned, “It didn’t look like ‘nothing’ to me though…” he said as he looked at Pär,
Pär grinned, “Yeah… you know what?”
“Hm?”
“You’re right… there was something I found ‘funny’- well, more like ‘cute’ actually…” Pär confesses,
“Really? Like what?” Joakim curiously asked,
Pär leaned close to Joakim, “You” before gently cupping his face with his hands and placing a loving kiss on his forehead,
Instantaneously, Joakim’s whole face flushed, turning two shades pink,
He covered his face with his hands, using his sleeves to hide his flushed expression,
Pär only chuckled and grinned, he gently pried Joakim’s hands away from his face and stared into his nervous blue eyes,
“Do me a favor?” Pär asked, and watched as Joakim nodded,
“Close your eyes… alright?”
Joakim flushed harder but otherwise kept his eyes closed, putting his trust in his friend,
Pär had seen just how hurt Joakim had been earlier in the day and now, he wanted to change that for him,
How?
Well with physical affection of course,
He knew just how touch starved he was for any sort of affection, so he was going to grant him what he wanted most,
As Joakim kept his eyes closed, Pär re-cupped his face in his rough hands, they had been scarred through years of hard work and labor but he didn’t mind, as they were incredibly gentle for him,
Pär pressed a kiss first on Joakim’s forehead, then he moved to his temples, each one getting a kiss,
Then his eyelids, he was exceptionally careful with this area, making sure not to press his lips too hard lest he hurt him,
Then onto his rosy cheeks, Pär stopped for a brief moment to admire them, not only where they were very pink and warm to the touch, but they were the cutest chubbiest cheeks he has ever seen, as he ran his thumb on them he could feel Joakim give a soft whine,
He felt his nervous hands wrap around his waist and press himself closer to him,
Pär gave a happy hum and kissed them, making sure to pepper his adorable cheeks with as many kisses as his heart desired,
Joakim gave a happy chuckle from bellow, which made Pär overjoyed,
As he finished with his cheeks he moved his attention to the final spot worthy of affection and love,
His cute button nose,
He gave it a sweet little kiss and then pulled away from Joakim’s face only to see his face flush harder, but he gave Pär the widest and most relaxed smile he’s ever seen,
Suddenly the air around them wafted with the scent of berries and of dough,
Which made Joakim’s mouth water, he moved his attention from Pär to over his shoulder, he called out to Hannes, “Is it ready?”
“It is! Come get it while it’s still hot!” Hannes replied,
Joakim grinned and gave Pär a big hug before pulling away and scrambling out of the couch to go eat his favorite type of breakfast pancakes,
Pär chuckled and watched as he ran off, instead of leaving Pär decided to stay on the couch and catch up on some much-neglected reading, he stretches over and grabs his book that lies on its side on a nearby coffee table,
He opens it to where he had last left off and began reading…
As Joakim sat down on the dinner table, eager to eat some deliciously sweet pancakes,
He watches as Hannes put down the plate of mouth-wateringly-sweet-goodness in front of him, and before he could take a bit out of it with his fork he felt warm lips press against his cheeks, making him blush even more,
Joakim nervously sat there, blushing like a fool as he stared down at the plate of deliciousness,
“Joakim?” Hannes began as he pulled over a chair and sat down next to him,
Joakim turned to look at him, “…yeah…?” he quietly asked, cheeks still flushed,
Hannes chuckled and gave them another quick peck, “You do know that we’re here for you, right?” he asked,
Joakim silently nodded, his face had now grown two shades pinker,
“Good… now eat up before it gets cold… alright?”
He wordlessly nodded, turned his attention to his pancakes, and began eating,
Hannes, who still sat next to him, ate an oatmeal cookie and drank hot cocoa to keep him company,
Something that Joakim deeply appreciated as he ate his food,
Once it was all said and done, Joakim helped Hannes clean up the plates in the kitchen, and then…
And then…
Well, he didn’t really know what to do with himself, he definitely didn’t want to go back to his room and be stuck with his thoughts, so, he just silently hovered around Hannes,
Which was fine, as Hannes didn’t really mind, he silently guided Joakim over to where he knew Tommy and Chris where at,
Hannes knew that those two were great fun, and surely, they’d have something that Joakim could be a part of,
Hannes and Joakim walked into the gaming room where they found the other two sitting on the floor playing games with each other on their cellphones,
“Hey, boys…” Hannes began
Chris and Tommy looked up from their phones and greeted both Hannes and their new friend Joakim,
“Hey Joakim, want to play with us?” Chris asked,
“Oh! Yeah! Come! We’re playing a really fun game!”
Joakim nervously looked over and nodded, since he didn’t know what to do with himself and was very bored… then perhaps some time spent with them and gaming wasn’t going to be bad,
And Hannes smiled, as he watched Joakim walk over to them, silently he left the three as he had other business to attend to, mostly pertaining to tomorrow’s meal and making a grocery list of food to buy,
Joakim sat down on the floor with them, Chris moved his cellphone over to Joakim, “Do you know this game?” he showed it to him,
Joakim shook his head, “No, not really… I’ve only heard about it… what is it about?” he asked,
Chris nodded, “That’s fair, well, it’s an adventure game, you play as this little person-“ he shows Joakim his character which is a tiny humanoid being, they have dark skin and seem to have what looks like a mask for a face along with brilliantly white hair with matching white clothes and a red cape around their shoulders,
“-They look nice-“ Joakim complements,
“-Thank you! And What you have to do is go around the map, which is super large, and collect light and spread light around the map, this allows you to have a longer cape that allows you to fly in the air for longer periods of time…”
Joakim nodded along to the explanation, “Sounds like fun, how do I play?”
“Download it on your phone and then you can play with the two of us!”
“Ok, what’s it called?”
“Sky: Children of Light…”
“Gotcha!” Joakim went on the app store of his phone and typed in the name of the game, he found the game that matched the one Chris showed him and he pressed the download button and waited,
“Do you want to play on my phone for a while, as you wait for it to download?” Chris asks,
Joakim hesitates before answering and Chris can tell but never mentions it, “I-…y-you sure?” he asks,
Chris nods, “Yeah, come on! Here give it a try-“ he says as he extends his cellphone to his friend,
Joakim takes it and is very, very careful with it,
Chris gives him the quick run-down of how to move the character,
Tommy smiles at them before diverting his attention back to his phone, in the game he approaches Joakim, and makes his character extend his hand out to him,
“You see that button?” Chris says as he points to a large white circle above Tommy’s character, it has the symbol of hands holding, “Touch it and you can hold Tommy’s character’s hand… Go ahead…”
Joakim nods and presses the button, as he does he sees Chris’ character hold Tommy’s character’s hand,
Tommy then proceeds to fly around the map with Joakim holding on to him, he takes him to a mountain top where together they watch the sea of clouds fly by along with bright yellow creatures soaring in them,
“…Oh wow…” Joakim breathes out, the art style of the game has him captivated, it’s very beautiful,
“Beautiful, eh?” Chris asks,
Joakim nods, “Yes!”
Chris looks over to Joakim’s still unlocked phone and notices the game finished downloading, he takes the cellphone and grabs a pair of good headphones he has, he plugs them in and hands the cellphone back to its owner,
“Here you go man, it's done, go and play it, ok? You have a small tutorial to finish and then I and Tommy will meet you at the end of it, alright?”
Joakim nodded and took his cellphone, he noticed the headphones and was about to ask Chris,
“-It’s ok, they’re yours now, you can use them!” Chris happily exclaimed,
Joakim nodded, and put them on, he quietly watched the game introduction sequence, and then after it played the tutorial of the game,
After three hours Chris, Tommy, and Joakim all found themselves laughing and having fun with each other,
Joakim wasn’t using his headphones anymore as he wanted to hear what his friends were saying,
“Joakim grab my hand-“
“-Ok”
And Joakim chuckled as he watched Tommy’s much larger character grab a hold of his much smaller one’s hand, the two soared through the clouds,
“Do you two see any more spirits of light?” Chris asked,
“I do, to your left Tommy, Y- Yep! There on the cliff!” Joakim pointed out,
As Tommy interacted with the spirit, Joakim saw that his cape gained another star, “Oh! I have another star! That’s three now…” he pointed out,
Chris smiled, “Good! That means that we’ll be able to fly better now, more air time!”
Joakim smiled brightly at the news because he really enjoyed flying in this game, it was by far the most enjoyable experience he’s ever had…
A few hours later into playing the game, the boys found themselves at the final level, it was in a land that was very desolate and the boys had to use their light to give it back to the fallen spirits encased in stone,
As they did that, Chris and Tommy’s characters died,
Joakim was the only one left and he frowned, he had one final star of his soul to give out,
He stared at the screen before finally giving it away, it took not a short while before Joakim too saw his character die,
He frowned quietly at the screen, he had grown so fond of his little person and now they were gone…
Chris and Tommy shared a silent look, they didn’t want to tell Joakim about what would happen next so as to watch his reaction,
When Joakim saw that his character was actually alive and he was able to interact he stared at the screen with the most puzzling reaction ever,
Slowly he found himself watching his character soar through the clouds once more with the other animals of light and be reborn,
As Joakim was once again brought to the introductory screen with his character in the little island he gave a happy smile and wiped at his eyes, he could feel the beginnings of tears that wanted to fall but he prevented them from falling,
Chris noticed and pulled him closer, with an arm wrapped around him he comforted his new friend,
“Did you like it?” Chris asked,
Joakim nodded, he wanted to stay silent and wipe away at the tears that kept forming, the ending was very beautiful and it moved him to tears, they weren’t sad tears but rather happy ones,
“Good-“ Chris pressed a kiss to his forehead, “Do you want to keep playing or do you want to do something else?”
Joakim blushed and gave a sigh, “Something else… please?”
Chris nodded, “Alright…” he paused for a moment to think about what he could do,
“Hey, I have an idea!” Tommy chimed in,
Chris turned his attention to him, “Ok… what do you have planned?”
“A sleepover!” he eagerly declared,
Joakim looked over to both of them, he’s never been a part of a sleepover in his life, so he didn’t know what the activity would entail for him,
Chris nodded, “Yeah, why not!”
Joakim frowned and Tommy noticed, “You don’t like the idea, Joakim?” he asked,
He blushed and shook his head, “N-No! I-I… I-I just-…” he bit his lip and nervously tried to find a way to explain his predicament to them, in a way that they’d understand,
“I-I’ve just never been to a sleepover… I don’t know what it is… really…” he finally confessed, as he nervously wrung his hands together,
Chris looked at him as though he had grown a tail, “Wait, really?” he asked
Joakim found himself cringing lightly, “Y-Yeah…”, he half wondered if it was a good idea to say that out loud,
He hoped that he wasn’t going to be ridiculed for-
“Oh man, we have to change that right now” Tommy answered,
“H-Huh?” Joakim replied back,
“Stay here Joakim, I’m going upstairs to your room, I’ll get your PJs, Baron, and the weighted blanket-“ Tommy noted as he got up from his spot on the floor, he was already heading out of the room,
“Chris, do you want me to bring some Blankets and pillows too?” he asked,
Chris nodded, “Yeah go ahead, me and Joakim will make some snacks…” he replied and watched with his friend as Tommy left the room,
Joakim remained silent, if he was being honest he didn’t expect such positive reactions, he mostly expected ridicule or for them to laugh at him,
He kept quiet and turn his gaze downwards,
“Hey-“ Chris places a comforting hand on Joakim’s shoulder, “You ok?” he asked him,
“Yeah” Joakim lied,
Chris could tell, he frowned, “Don’t lie to me man, what’s wrong…?
Joakim picked at his nails, “Why didn’t you ridicule me?” he asked,
Chris pulled Joakim into a tight hug and held him there, “Because you’re my friend Joakim, that’s why… when Tommy and I mistreated you when we first met, you on the other hand were nothing but kind to us, especially during our panic attacks…” he explained,
Joakim didn’t reply, instead, he tightened the hug and remained silent as he listened to Chris’s heartbeat,
“…Why, did someone do that to you?” Chris asked,
Joakim slowly nodded,
Chris deeply frowned, he placed a kiss on the top of Joakim’s head, “I promise you that Tommy and I would never do that, especially to you… ok?”
Joakim nodded,
Chris pulled away from the hug slightly so that he could see Joakim’s face and he found him looking up at his own eyes, “Cheer up, alright? You’re safe, you’re loved, and we’re all in this together, I promise…”
Joakim sighed and nodded, “…Ok…”
“Now come on, if Tommy sees you upset he’ll get upset too, ok? Give me a smile, come on” Chris encouraged him,
Joakim gave a tiny half-hearted smile,
Chris chuckled, “Oh come on, I’ve seen you give big beautiful smiles, can I see one of them, please?” he asked,
Joakim blushed and slowly found himself giving him a wide earnest smile,
“Ah… there we go-“ Chris spoke with a smile of his own before kissing Joakim’s forehead again, “-Now that’s a good smile, did anyone ever tell you that you have a beautiful smile?”
Joakim nodded while blushing, “Y-Yeah…”
Chris chuckled, “Good, because you do and I never want to see you sad again, got it?”
Joakim chuckled, he nodded “Yes sir” he teased and watched as Chris laughed,
“Ok, come on, let’s go make those snacks…” he helped his friend stand, and together the two walked out of the room and into the kitchen where their fridge raiding frenzy would begin…
Joakim lay comfortably on top of two very thick blankets on the floor, he had two pillows to sleep with as well as a blanket, and so did Chris and Tommy,
Currently, the trio were huddled up close to one another watching the Disney movie WALL-E after they had finished a fun drinking game,
The game was to see who could stare at the other without making them smile or laugh, of course, Tommy and Joakim lost most rounds, with Chris winning the majority,
But it was all good because Joakim was having too much fun with himself,
He felt Tommy snuggle close to him and Joakim melted at his touch, he allowed the other to hold him
Chris grabbed two more strawberries and ate one, while the other he fed to Joakim who gladly ate it,
As he contently watched the rest movie with his friends Joakim thought to himself that sleepovers were now his favorite thing…
Joakim yawned as he hugged Baron, his eyelids felt heavy and he was fighting hard to keep them open,
Tommy looked over at the sleepy Joakim and thought that he looked adorable, he placed a kiss on his forehead and watched the tired male give him a loopy smile in return,
“Hey, Chris?” Tommy asked his friend,
“Yeah?”
“Let’s go to sleep, Joakim’s exhausted…”
A tired whine came from the aforementioned man, “…n-no… s’ok… m’stay… 'wake…” he slurred out,
Tommy quietly chuckled, “Oh no you aren’t… you’re absolutely drained, come on- Chris, turn the TV off, let’s go to sleep…” he pleaded with his friend,
And with a nod Chris abided to Tommy’s pleas and shut off the TV, plunging the room into darkness,
Both boys heard Joakim complain about with a tired whine,
“Easy… come on, let’s sleep…” Tommy coerced Joakim as he slowly invited him down into the makeshift beds,
With another whine and a sigh, Joakim relented, he laid down on his makeshift bed and snuggled under the bedsheets, his arms wrapped protectively around Baron the Bear,
Behind him, Joakim could hear Chris shuffle around, he tiredly wondered what he was up to,
And he got his answer when he felt an arm wrap around his waist from behind,
Chris had moved his makeshift bed closer to Joakim and was doing his best to snuggle close to him for extra warmth and comfort as he slowly drifted off to sleep,
Tommy did the same but instead, he found Joakim’s hand and held it as he allowed his eyelids to fall,
As Joakim too began to drift off into the land of dreams, his last coherent thought was of how thankful he was to have such kind and loving people in his life,
And as he fell asleep, a soft smile was painted on his lips,
A feeling of warmness and love filling him…