Work Text:
sweet tea in the summer,
cross your heart won’t tell no other
Sophomore year
Brittany’s eyes were wide, and Brittany’s eyes were scared.
It was a good thing Santana was pointedly staring at the floor, because otherwise she would try to jump into them and drown right then and there. Brittany’s fingers stroked the back of her neck, gliding down to the bare expanse of her back between her shirt and her sweatpants.
“I didn’t mean anything by it, San,” Brittany murmured gently. “I’m not even sure anyone could hear it.”
Santana scoffed and moved away from the pliant, all-encompassing heat of her body. “Yeah, it’s not like we were on a group call or anything. God, Britt, you can’t say things like that.”
Brittany worried her bottom lip between her teeth, looking very much like a lost puppy. It was absurd how beautiful she looked, even then, when their reputations were hanging over their heads like the bucket of pig’s blood from Carrie.
Santana tried to stay angry, but when she felt the pull , the one that would make her give her life for Brittany, she felt herself soften. Just a little bit.
“Look,” she said, sliding a hand to rest over Brittany’s thigh, “it’s not summer anymore. We can’t be all over each other and expect no one to notice. Kurt keeps shooting me these looks, like he thinks I’m one of him. I swear he wants us to join hands and start singing Kumbaya.” She felt her face burn and the words sting like poison in the back of her throat, but she willed herself to go on. “And I’m not down for gay shit like that, Britt. I mean, we’re Cheerios.”
“We could be fruit loops,” Brittany said quietly. “They’re shaped like Cheerios but-“
“I know what fruit loops are, Brittany.” Santana cut her off harshly. “But we can’t be them. I’m not gay and I don’t think you are, either. You’re just confused.”
When Santana finished her tirade, she chanced a quick look at Brittany, and she wished she didn’t- not when she saw the tears pooling in the corners of her eyes.
“Britt,” she tried to backtrack, but Brittany just shrugged her shoulders and smiled sadly.
“I guess I can be stupid sometimes, huh?”
Santana shook her head vehemently as dread travelled up her spine, to her heart. “No, that’s not what I was-“
“My mom wants me home for dinner,” Brittany muttered, rising off the bed and grabbing her backpack. She didn’t look up, even when every cell of Santana’s body was pleading her to. “And I have a lot of biology homework to do.”
The air felt stifling to Santana, like every breath she took pushed her closer to the edge of falling apart completely.
“But I usually do it for you,” Santana whispered, her voice bare and pleading and guilty.
Brittany looked up, just once, her bottom lip trembling beneath her teeth. “I think I’ll do it on my own tonight.”
With that, she spun around on her heels and walked through the door, leaving Santana alone on the bed.
She felt inside out; her heart laid beside her on the crumpled sheets, screaming I need you I need you I need you with every beat.
and though I can’t recall your face,
I still got love for you
Junior year
Brittany broke up with Artie.
The whole glee club knew about it as soon as it happened, but Santana somehow found out through Facebook. She clicked Brittany’s status and froze when she realized it said “single” instead of “in a relationship.” Her breath hitched and her heart sang and she resisted the urge to puke.
Although they haven’t hung out in over a month, her fingers itched to give Brittany a call and ask her to come over. She pressed on Brittany’s contact and sighed. What would she even say?
Maybe she’d scream, “I’m so pitifully in love with you it’s been killing me from the inside out.” Maybe she’d say, “I hate you for dating him but I hate myself even more for letting you.” Or maybe she’d just sing her a song about love and forgiveness and an undying urge to touch her skin.
After over ten minutes of deliberating every last possible outcome, she just settled on a simple text:
Can we meet somewhere and talk?
She didn’t have to wait long for a response. Within a minute, she got her answer.
Breadstix?
Santana smiled and closed her eyes, a blanket of relief covering every inch of her body.
She knew she had a second chance, and she’d never felt so lucky.
Yeah , she typed, I’ll pick you up at 8?
It’s a date!! :)
She won’t fuck this up. Not this time.
your braids like a pattern
love you to the moon and to saturn
Senior year.
“Can you sleep over tonight?” Brittany asked, playing with the fingers Santana rested in her lap. Her long legs intertwined with Santana’s on the dashboard of her car, resting there.
Santana smiled brightly and nodded. “Yeah. I already talked it over with my mom and she said it was fine.”
Brittany smirked. “Think she knows we won’t be doing much sleeping?”
“Oh, definitely. I think she’s just glad I can’t get pregnant.”
Brittany threw her head back and laughed, loud and free, the melodious sound of it ringing in Santana’s ears. She sent a silent prayer, a silent thank you, out to whoever gave her this incredible opportunity to hear the sound of her girlfriend’s laugh every day.
Well, for now, at least. She couldn’t even think about the fact that in three months, she’d be going to the University of Ohio. And Brittany would be staying in Lima, repeating her senior year.
Brittany must have noticed the change in her girlfriend’s mood, because she lifted a gentle, lithe finger to trace the outlines of her face, right where her dimples should’ve been.
Santana’s eyes fell closed and she sighed, leaning over the center console to burrow her head in the crook between Brittany’s neck and shoulder.
“What are you doing, snuggle bug?” Brittany asked, and Santana giggled.
“Trying to get close to you.”
“Well, we can do that later,” Brittany murmured. “Right now, I gotta drop you off so I can dress up nice and pretty for you. And then we’ll have dinner- somewhere that’s not Breadstix- and celebrate your acceptance to school!”
Santana froze, clenching her jaw and shaking her head.
“I can’t even think about that right now,” she said. She picked her head up until she was face-to-face with Brittany, staring into azure eyes she still managed to get lost in, even after months of looking at them every chance she got.
“Why not, San?”
Santana’s lower lip trembled wildly, but Brittany lifted her chin and pressed a soft kiss to it, and then another to her top lip. And then another to her chin, and her forehead, and the apples of both her cheeks.
It was too much but not enough; Santana nearly crumpled beneath her touch.
“I’m just scared,” she finally stated. “Of losing you.”
Her voice was quiet, and her voice was fierce. But she knew that Brittany loved her quiet, and Brittany loved her fierce.
“I know it’s gonna suck the first few months,” Brittany whispered, her arms wrapped securely around Santana, like she was trying to keep all of her insides in place so that they wouldn’t spill out onto the floor of the car. “But we’ll Skype every day, and I’ll send you pictures of Lord Tubbington- because he’ll definitely miss you- and I’ll come up to visit on the weekends if my parents let me.”
Santana didn’t look convinced, so Brittany brought a hand down to the pocket of her Cheerios uniform to rustle through it. She grinned triumphantly as she pulled out a slightly crumpled piece of paper.
Santana raised a neatly-plucked eyebrow in confusion. “What’s this, Britt Britt?”
Brittany grinned in response, setting the paper down onto her girlfriend’s lap. “This a train ticket set for one week after you move into the dorms,” she said. “A train ticket that’ll bring you straight home to me.”
Santana’s eyes widened and her heart let out a wild, out-of-tune note. But, her heart wasn’t crumpled. Not like the ticket. Not like before.
“Yeah?” she asked, but within that word were millions and millions of I love you’s and please don’t leave me’s, all tied together in a knot that sat in the back of her throat.
“Yeah,” Brittany said, smiling gently. “Totally yeah.”
Passed down like folk songs,
the love lasts so long
The Beyond.
The morning air was a mixture of stifling summer heat and a soft warmth leftover from last night’s rainfall. The little apartment seemed to house all of the burning rays from outside the window, but Santana didn’t mind. She would live in ninety degree weather every day, for the rest of her life, if it meant she’d spend it beside Brittany.
“What’s even in this thing?” Brittany called out from the living room.
Santana shot her head up and smiled at the sight of her girlfriend- no, her fiancée- struggling to lift a moving box off of the floor.
“I think it might be rocks,” Santana called back. “Yeah, definitely rocks.”
Brittany stuck out her tongue in mock-defiance, and all Santana could do was giggle. She walked over to where Brittany stood against the couch and brought her arms to wrap around her torso, resting her chin on a bony shoulder.
“Mmm, this is nice, San,” Brittany sighed, “but don’t think snuggling with me will get you out of unpacking.”
Santana squeezed tighter and pressed a kiss against the side of her neck. Then another, against her cheek, and another, right where her collarbone met the top of her cleavage.
“Drop the box, Brittany,” she whispered, feeling her fiancée tense in her arms. “Drop the box and come to bed with me.”
Brittany spun around and grinned. The flickers of light that peeked through the blinds illuminated her face. Santana was almost awestruck at the pure, unfiltered beauty in front of her. She was almost awestruck that she would be carrying that beauty into their bedroom, making love to her on their bed.
“What’s going on in your head?” the beauty asked, when she noticed Santana’s expression of wonder.
“I’m just really happy,” Santana said. “And I still cannot get over how cute you look in those overalls.”
Brittany grinned softly, her cheeks growing red under her fiancée’s gaze. “Wanna know a secret?” she asked, leaning into Santana’s ear.
“Yeah.”
“I’m not wearing anything under these overalls, San,” Brittany whispered, her hot breath mingling with the side of Santana’s face, which blossomed with a devious, loving smirk.
“Oh yeah? I’m gonna have to check, just to be su-“
And with that, Brittany scooped up Santana and carried her over her shoulder to their bedroom, her laugh ringing through the halls of their apartment.
Her unspoken words of forever and ever trailed behind them, leaving imprints of their love on the carpet.