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“I wanna infinitely skate together with you,” Langa says to him. The two of them sat on the cool concrete, aching and bruised from their collision. But Reki can’t feel the ache in his body, not really. There’s the gentle night-time breeze, bringing with it a slight chill, though Reki can’t feel that either. All that he’s hyper aware of is his heart, beating and beating, and the boy in front of him.
When Langa adds an extra step to their handshake, some not so small voice in Reki’s head says, what if you held his hand? He doesn’t, but he thinks about it, once they’ve laughed and brushed themselves off, once they’ve gotten to their feet and start skating again, Reki still thinks about it.
What should I even say to him? He’d agonised on his way here, only for it not to matter at all. Why he felt he had to leave behind “S”, why he’d been so angry, so upset at Langa...or, how badly he wanted to be by Langa’s side, how he feels this burning in the pit of his stomach— a desire, a need to be with Langa, to hold his hand, to be more than someone he skated with.
Reki can’t muster up the courage to say it like that, and Langa has always been braver than him.
“We...should probably go soon.”
The sky is pitch black, stars dotted across the landscape. It paints a pretty picture. Neither Langa nor Reki has kept track of time. And though time will move on regardless, it feels like this could go on forever— the two of them skating under a starry sky, no competition, no “S” or Adam there to throw a wrench between them— so checking the time would only shatter the illusion. But Reki cracks first, sliding his phone out his pocket and wincing at the bright light.
11:39pm blinks back at him. Close to midnight.
“Yeah…” Reki sighs, glancing up at Langa then back at his phone. “Do you...wanna stay over, at my place?” His suggestion is hesitant and earnest, and he keeps his gaze low, heat rising on his cheeks as if Langa hasn’t stayed over a million times before.
This...this feels distinctly different from all the other times, and Reki could take a guess as to why. He chances a look up at Langa, whose eyes are widened momentarily, lips parted but no words coming out. Is it that it’s the same for him too, Reki wonders, this shift?
But Langa seems to shake off the initial surprise, and nods. “I was just thinking that I don’t want to leave yet...can I really stay over?”
They skate home together, all smiles and silly laughter. Reki trips over a crack on the sidewalk and Langa stumbles because of a stray pebble. They’re all stupid mistakes sure, but they aren’t skating to win anything. When he’s with Langa, being dumb, tripping over curbs, it’s as though Reki has won already. All this time, he’s been so stupid— this is what skating was all about, this was skating at its best.
Langa’s laughter rings clear in the air, and it sounds like a song, music to his ears. It sounds sweet, Reki thinks, and if sounds had a taste he’s certain Langa’s laughter would be something sugary but refreshing all the same, maybe a cold drink on a summer’s day.
Their laughter quiets down once they reach Reki’s house. They tiptoe their way through the dark hallways, try not to make a sound— though everyone’s fast asleep by now. Still, Langa and Reki’s steps are giddy, wide awake from the rush of skating (the rush of being with him again). They speak in hushed whispers and muffle their laughter behind their hands, slip into Reki’s room and breathe a sigh of relief.
It’s not like he’d get in trouble for inviting Langa over, but this night was theirs, something between them that Reki didn’t want anyone else to see. Didn’t want someone to shatter the quietness of their lingering looks and the warmth of Langa beside him, for it to all fall away and turn out to be nothing.
“Here-” Reki rustles through his drawers, picks out a set of his own clothes. “You can wear this.”
He isn’t sure what he expected, what made this impromptu sleepover different from the others, but it’s mostly the same at first. The two of them lie flat on their stomachs in Reki’s bed, watching skating videos and talking in bits in pieces. It’s comfortable, it’s them, but for Reki there’s something else that hangs in the air, a dam waiting to break.
The video plays on, and Langa begins to say less and less. Eventually he’s completely silent. Reki goes to pause the video, nudges the other.
“Langa? You asleep?”
Reki lets his phone, the video, fall to the wayside when Langa nudges him back softly.
“No, I…”
“You were so quiet, I thought you’d passed out already.”
Langa shakes his head, shifts so he’s lying on his side facing Reki. “No, I’m still awake. I...don’t want this night to end yet.”
Reki can only stare back at Langa, melting at the light in his eyes and the softness in his gaze. He couldn’t really believe it, that anyone would ever, could ever , look at him like this.
“...Me neither.”
Langa doesn't tear his eyes away, doesn’t get up or lean back. The moment doesn't pass, leaving words left unsaid and actions never done . Instead, he leans in, just that much closer.
“You…” Langa starts, drops his gaze for a moment. “Reki, you’re really, really amazing.”
Reki laughs, presses his face to his pillow. “Langa, you already said that.” His words are all muffled, the heat from the back of his neck spreading up to his cheeks in splotches of red, which he tries desperately to hide.
“I know, but it’s true, and it’s not just that, it’s—” a hand falls to Reki’s shoulder, and he has to remind himself not to hold his breath— “It’s all of you, not just the skating part. You’re kind and friendly and fun to be around, you make me smile—”
“—Langa, I can’t believe you’re this talkative—”
“—You’re funny and caring, and you’re so...so pretty.”
Now, Reki stills completely instead of squirming at the compliments, glances at Langa shyly with half his face still smooshed against a pillow. Maybe he didn’t hear that right. “Wh- what?”
The hand on his shoulder, Langa’s hand, grips tighter, as if determined to prove a point.
“I think you’re beautiful, Reki.”
“M- me? Beautiful? Langa...that’s all you.” He can’t even look Langa in the eye, so Reki resigns himself to staring up at the ceiling, lying on his back. He only regrets the shift in position because Langa can’t hold onto his shoulder anymore.
“No.”
“No?”
“Maybe you can’t see it, but you really are beautiful to me.” There’s more shuffling, Langa getting up, and then Reki can no longer stare at the ceiling, at the dim lights casting shadows above him. Because in its place is Langa, gazing down at him, his eyes and his smile fond as ever. “I like you Reki. I like you... so, so much.”
Langa has always been braver than Reki, except for this one time.
He’s not sure how he musters up the courage to do what he does next. Reki’s heart is in his throat, and his legs would have been jelly had he been standing, but he takes the leap of faith anyway. This unspoken tension that lingers in the air dissipates, fading away when Reki takes Langa’s face in his hands, and kisses him.
Time doesn’t seem real during the kiss— breathing in the softly scented shampoo of Langa's hair, pressing his lips to slightly chapped ones, the pads of Reki's fingertips tapping against Langa's cheeks, warm and reddened with a flush. It actually lasts all of five seconds, before Reki can’t help but to laugh against Langa’s mouth, smile too wide. But, it’s as if for a moment, their wish of a never ending night comes true.
“What’s so funny? Was it bad?”
“No no no, I just can’t believe I did that.” He tucks in a loose strand of Langa’s hair behind his ear, lets his thumb trace circles over his cheek. “I kissed you, Langa.”
“Mhm.” He smiles, sweet and soft and so beautiful Reki never wants to look away. “Can you kiss me again?”
Reki stops time once more that night when he presses his lips to Langa’s again. Because as it turns out, this night isn’t an end as much as it’s a beginning for the two of them.