Work Text:
ARCHIVIST:
Hey Martin what’s up?
MARTIN:
Well, I’m kinda bummed out, innit? The apocalypse is not cool or fun.
ARCHIVIST:
Well, I’m similarly bummed.
MARTIN:
Hey, who’s that in the distance? I can’t quite see.
ARCHIVIST:
It couldn’t be…
ADMIRAL:
Meow! (translation: It is!)
We hear the sound of a really sexy and cool person kayaking towards the gang at high speeds.
ALL IN UNISON:
Tim! We thought you were dead!
TIM:
You were wrong! I’m here to save the day!
ARCHIVIST:
Well I don’t know-
He is interrupted as we hear sounds of The Eye doing spooky shit. We then hear Tim absolutely going to town on a motherfucker with his amazing kayak power. Martin hypes him up.
TIM:
Gnarly!
ARCHIVIST:
Woah! Thanks Tim! So what do we do now that you single handedly saved the day?
TIM:
I dunno I’m too sexy for this.
He kayaks away. The Archivist and Martin kiss. Admiral takes a nap. Elias keels over dead because he’s homophobic I think. The End.