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Izuku looks around the corner and into the common room. In the middle of it all, Kacchan and his friends are watching a movie and joking around. Kirishima is pressed up right next to him. He sighs before hiding behind the wall again. Kacchan’s friendship with Kirishima was one of the things he understood the least. It wasn’t anything against Kirishima! Honest.
Personally, he loved having Kirishima in their classroom. He was always very positive and good at pumping everyone up. If anything, Izuku would look at him and wish to have a little bit more of that energy. He tried his best to always be positive but sometimes it was a bit harder for him.
Whether that was because of something in his nature or the years of bullying he endured was an open question.
But no, Kacchan’s friendship with Kirishima was only confusing to him because of Kacchan. Why did he so easily let Kirishima and the rest into his circle – not just as extras but as people he seemed to genuinely care about. And why had Izuku’s lifelong efforts forever been ignored? What was different between him and Kirishima?
All his life, Izuku had tried so hard to befriend Kacchan. He’d hoped that at Yuuei something would be different but…
Before, Kacchan hated him because he didn’t have a quirk, but now, Izuku had a quirk! And he was even using it to be at the top of their class. But Kacchan still scowled at him and muttered (what Izuku assumed were) mean words under his breath around his friends.
Maybe it was because Izuku wasn’t always as genuine as Kirishima? His red-haired classmate was always smiling and encouraging. He may not have top grades in the class, but he was truly a friend to everyone. Izuku tried his best to smile and greet everyone, but sometimes it was scary! Sometimes he would mess up with a stutter or forget what they were talking about in the first place. He loved everyone in his class, but he wasn’t flawless at showing it.
And there were some days where he barely wanted to talk to people at all – days where he’d rather just write in his journal and think about quirks or villains and how to take them down.
As he continues to compare himself and Kirishima, he begins to wonder if it’s not where he and Kirishima differ that makes Kacchan hate him, but just everything about who he is. Maybe Kirishima doesn’t have some special charm, Kacchan just can’t stand Izuku. It hurts more than it should if he just saw Kacchan as a friend, but the explosive teen has always drawn Izuku in and recently his want for friendship turned into something a bit greedier.
Now, he wants Kacchan in a more, well, intimate way (to say the least).
Because Izuku knows it can’t be about persistent Kirishima was; though he did work very hard to befriend Kacchan – hadn’t Izuku done the same?
He gets shocked out of his musings by a hand slammed down right beside his head. He looks up to see Kacchan looking particularly peeved. He towers over Izuku and is glaring down at him. It takes Izuku’s brain a few second to catch up and realize he’s been trapped in a kabedon! He’s only ever seen these in manga. Did Kacchan still read any manga?
“Um – hi, Kacchan,” he stutters out but just gets a more severe glare for his efforts.
Kacchan is staring at him and looking all over Izuku’s upper half, it almost makes the teen want to shiver, before the blonde says, “What the fuck are you doing up here? Are you creeping on us? Listening to our conversations or something?”
“How did you know I was here?” Izuku can’t help but wonder, but soon realizes that wasn’t an answer to Kacchan’s accusations at all, “Wait, I wasn’t listening in at all. I just got distracted by my own thoughts on the way down,” he insists.
For a second, the scowl goes down, but Kacchan quickly shapes his face back to how he wants it, “D’you think I’m dumb? Of course I knew you were up here! You’re not exactly subtle,” he says, rolling his eyes.
“Sorry, Kacchan. I’ll work harder!” he promises him as if Kacchan had been giving him tips during their hero course (which he kind of had been!).
“Tch, yeah, yeah, yeah,” Kacchan rattles off like it’s a chore, “So, what the fuck has you so preoccupied that you just stopped in the middle of the fucking stairway,” he demands to know. His eyes are narrowed and Izuku knows that he just wants to know if Izuku was thinking about One For All. Izuku momentarily feels a little bit embarrassed that he’d been thinking about something so juvenile instead.
“Oh, um, nothing. How’s the movie?” Izuku asks, as if he hasn’t already seen All Might: The Superhero to Save the Day a million times before. Kacchan looks at him because he also knows how many times Izuku has seen the movie and Izuku tries to backtrack, “Then, how are your friends enjoying it?” he asks, his voice pulling thin over his words, “Shouldn’t you be sitting with them?”
“Why the fuck should I care about what they think?”
Izuku lets out a sharp breath, “Because they’re your friends! If you let them get this close than you should at least go all the way!”
“It’s not like I asked them to!” Kacchan growls back at him.
“But you let them and that’s basically the same thing. Do you know how difficult you can be? I never understand you despite knowing so much about who you are and it’s so frustrating,” he cries out.
Kacchan’s eyebrow twitches upwards and he leans in closer to Izuku. Their chests are almost touching and Izuku can feel Kacchan’s breath on his skin. He pushes down his thoughts and lingering crush, this isn’t the time for that. “I’m difficult? Have you ever looked in a fucking mirror? You’re impossible!” Kacchan’s voice has risen to more of a yell and Izuku wonders if he’s being just as loud.
“At least I actually let people in, instead of pretending like they don’t matter to me!” and, oh, he is being just as loud as Kacchan.
“For shit you do. When was the last time you told your friends anything about you?” Kacchan demands.
Izuku’s had enough of this, he pushes Kacchan off of him and the teen’s arm swings back to resting position at his side, “Is that why you hate me so much? Because I have a few secrets, some of which you’re to blame for?” he shoots back, “Do my secrets make me so horrible that you could never even think of being my friend even when you know all of them?”
Kacchan looks slightly defeated and Izuku turns away from him. He doesn’t want to see that face on him. Izuku starts walking back to his room but he only makes it to the top of the stairs before getting stopped. He turns to see Kacchan has a hand wrapped tightly around his wrist, “Why the fuck are you asking such stupid questions?”
“Why would you never let me be your friend? You let Kirishima in so easily and keep me as far as possible!”
“It’s because you’re different, Deku! You’ve always been different and you’ve always made me feel different. I hate how you make me feel!” he yells at Izuku and the green haired teen feels hot tears start to drip down his face.
“I hate it too,” he says back to Kacchan before he sprints off to his room. There’s no reason for him to linger when Kacchan seems to only want to hurt him.
He slams the door closed behind him and stays facing it for a few extra seconds. His arms are flush against the wood and his forehead is resting right below them. He wants to regret ever telling Kacchan about One For All but can’t seem to bring himself to do so.
Why is the blonde so ingrained in his life when, clearly, Izuku is too awful to ever be a big part of Kacchan’s?
He expects to just sit in silence for a few minutes before moving on when outside his door Kacchan screams at him, “Open the fucking door, Deku!”
“Go away, Kacchan!” Izuku hates how his voice sounds in this moment – insecurity cutting through it like a blade.
But naturally, Kacchan never does anything that Izuku wants him to. Instead of leaving, he bangs on Izuku’s door and it reverberates through his bones, “I’m not leaving until you let me the fuck in!”’
“What, so you can yell at me some more?”
Kacchan lets out a slur of curses outside before speaking to the door again, “Deku, please,” he says in a quieter voice. Izuku has never heard him so, patient? Is that what Kacchan sounds like right now? Izuku can’t quite place it. But it’s enough to persuade him.
He cracks open his door and looks at Kacchan through the crack, “What is it?”
Kacchan being Kacchan, he wastes no time in pushing open his door and sending Izuku back with it and walking in. Then he slams the door shut behind him, “I don’t hate you, you idiot!” is what he decides to start with.
It’s so contrary to everything Izuku thought of Kacchan that he takes a second to process it, “You, what?” he asks, hoping for some kind of clarification.
“What, are you deaf now too?” he bites back but then turns to push the front of his hair back, “Shit,” he says under his breath. “I don’t like feeling powerless, or soft, or out-of-control, or like none of that even matters!”
“I’m confused, Kacchan, what are you even talking about?”
“I want – I need to be strong, okay? Sometimes, you make me feel like I’m the strongest out there; but sometimes, I feel like that doesn’t even matter if I can’t-“
“You are the strongest; and you beat me at Ground Beta, I don’t get why you-“ Izuku starts but Kacchan cuts him off.
“When I say you are Shitty Hair are different, I mean I’ve never liked Shitty Hair before,” he spits out like its poison on his tongue.
“Don’t be an ass, Kacchan. You’re not making any sense!”
Kacchan throws his hands up in the air like he’s begging the gods for some kind of clarity before bringing them down and wrapping them around Izuku’s neck and pulling him in for what must be the most violent kiss in existence.
Izuku is so shocked by what’s happening that he doesn’t know what to do at first so it’s just Kacchan pushing his mouth onto Izuku’s and trying to make something happen. But then he gets the message and moves back against Kacchan. He pushes his crush on his bed and follows on top of him in due time to continue the kissing.
It’s like a drug he can’t get enough of. Any thoughts that had previously directed his mind have dissipated and Kacchan is all there is. In front of him, in his hair, on his lips, against his thigh. There’s no room for thinking when everything is Kacchan.
They kiss and the world comes to a slow. The surroundings of Izuku’s room blends into nothing and time doesn’t even feel real. Izuku is lost but if this is what being lost is like, he wouldn’t mind never finding his way again.
Eventually, Kacchan pushes him over so that the blonde is on top and stops them. Kacchan’s legs are on either side of Izuku’s torso and the teen is properly pinned down, “Do you fucking get it now?” Kacchan yells at him. But his face is flushed and his lips are bruised red from kissing. He doesn’t look angry at all.
Izuku, dazed, nods at the blonde, “I think I get it now. Do you still hate how I make you feel?” he asks back.
“I just hated that there was nothing I could do about it,” Kacchan says with a self-satisfied grin that almost sends Izuku back into his daze. He never knew his feelings for Kacchan could be this strong. But it makes him feel like he could do anything.
“I think I understand,” he says, looking into Kacchan’s red eyes. He feels like he’s been chasing Kacchan all his life only to catch up and find out that being with him was nothing like he’d expected. Though, he thinks with a blush, he wouldn’t trade this for anything in the world.
“Now, come down and watch the stupid fucking movie with me and the extras,” Kacchan commands and gets off the bed, offering his hand.
“Wait, does this mean we’re friends now?” Izuku asks.
Katsuki looks up like he’s been personally spited, “I’d say we’re a lot more than that, you Deku,” and Izuku grabs onto his hand with a smile.
“Okay, Kacchan,” he replies and follows Kacchan out of his room, feeling like he’s won the lottery. It was funny how he could be so wrong about Kacchan when he’s known him all his life. He hopes that he can keep learning more and more about him and he never stops! And along the way, he might even fall in love.