Work Text:
“Kaeya. Why don’t you stop there for today? I can take care of the rest.”
It was nearing midnight on the last day of the Windblume Festival, the Festival of Freedom. Ironically, the administration backlog that had accumulated over the week course of said festival had chained numerous Knights of Favonius Officials to their desks. Possibly for many weeks after. The scratching of a feather pen halted as the Cavalry Captain looked up from his pile of yet-to-be done paperwork, raising a brow (or both, one couldn’t tell with that fringe) at the Acting Grandmaster of the Knights of Favonius.
“Sure you can.” He said flatly, gazing at the mountains of similarly unfinished paperwork on her desk. “I assume you are going to skip tomorrow’s morning patrol with Lisa then?”
“...you know I can’t.” Jean sighed, leaning back into her seat. She holds a hand to her forehead, kneading her acupoints as if to curb a headache. “I can only imagine how many loose ends there are to be tied up after the festival ends…”
“On the bright side, Lisa would be delighted at the number of drunkards there would be.”
“Don’t remind me.”
Silence settles over the two, neither of them having the mental capacity to carry on simple conversation, much less return to their paperwork. The liveliness and merrymaking right outside the window only served to dampen their moods for work further. Kaeya can practically taste the tantalising scent of Applebloom Cider from the Angel’s Share, and it was, hands down, much more preferable than the musty scent of paper. The sweetness of the drink mingled with the scent of fresh blooms that lined the bright streets of Mondstadt, he would be getting drunk on the atmosphere that was only as pleasant as the company beside him...
“Do you remember the first Windblume Festival we had attended together?” Jean’s question brought Kaeya out of his thoughts. He nodded, replying absentmindedly. “Of course. The three of us had spent the majority of it escorting a particularly cowardly merchant back to Mondstadt. Ah, how I wished you two goody two shoes had just let me knock the man out.”
“It wouldn’t have been proper. Besides, how would three of us even carry a grown man on horseback?”
“A man that feeble wouldn’t have weighed much anyway. We would have had a lot more time to bring you around and enjoy the festival if not for that.”
“Master Diluc’s and your company alone was plenty enough to make it the best Windblume Festival I had ever been to.” Jean chuckled. Kaeya scoffed at that. “Considering how you had barely been to any back then, that really doesn’t mean much.”
Starlit eye turned towards the city filled with light and life, not wavering even as the night deepens. Grey eyes did the same.
“And now, you attend every Festival as its head and organiser.” Kaeya marvelled. “How times have changed.”
“Indeed.” The smile on Jean’s face was fond, her grey eyes lost in memories. “I strive to make everyone’s experience of the Windblume Festival as memorable as the one the two of you gave me. The mass dance at the plaza in particular.”
“Ah. That. We sure made a show of tripping all over ourselves. I had no idea what happened that night. Before that, Diluc and I…”
Had practiced dancing under the moonlight on the roof of our home.
Ah.
He slipped up.
It must be because of the moon. And exhaustion. Kaeya’s smile faded as he slotted another, more prettified smile back in place, picking up his pen. “Let’s not get too carried away now, Acting Grandmaster. Work won’t do by itself. If time permits, perhaps I could even get a glass of Appleblume Cider before Angel’s Share closed.”
Jean glanced at the Cavalry Captain who had resumed work, then back out the window. Not too many years ago on those very same streets, at the very same festival, three young trainee Knights of Favonius had danced through them to music Jean could barely hear from inside her residence before that day. The blonde haired girl laughed as she followed the bickering blue and red-haired youths, trying to mimic their clumsy dance steps, all the while sparkling gold ciders sloshed around in their hands. It was the same year after year, a time where Jean could experience freedom, surrounded by her closest of friends.
But now…
Jean sighed.
How times have changed indeed.
--
When Kaeya left the Knights of Favonius headquarters, Mondstadt had become as still as it did on a normal late night, except that there were a few more drunks passed out in the decorated hedges than usual. They would be woken up in a few hours, might as well let them enjoy their last moments of rest before they are shocked out of it when daybreaks.
The Angel’s Share had surely closed by now, Kaeya thought as he traversed the dark streets slowly, basking in this fragile moment of peace he rarely felt. Guess he wouldn’t have the chance to taste the Appleblume Cider this year either. He probably should have lied and told Diluc that the bard had wanted four bottles instead of three.
After all, what was one more lie upon the heaps that he had already told?
(But for what reason would he lie to the one person he wanted to be honest to?)
Unknowingly, Kaeya’s own feet had brought him to the steps of the Angel’s Share. There was no light underneath the locked doors...so Diluc wasn’t here.
Jean’s sudden nostalgia must have affected Kaeya more than he thought, to be seeking out his company with practically no excuse for doing so. No Dark Knight Hero matters to ruffle the fiery man with, no intel to gather from loose lips, or in Diluc’s words, no official business. He had none, certainly not so late into the night...or early in the morning. Kaeya had no way of knowing.
He settled down by the door, looking up at the waning moon. A splash of stars surrounded the moon, and it blessed the same brilliance onto the cobbled streets, painting them a gentle silver. The stars and the moon were all still bright, so it must still be late into the night, right?
There was still time for another dance.
That was what he would have told Diluc back then, when they danced under the stars so long ago that Kaeya could believe that he had merely dreamed of it. The blue haired youth would have convinced the red haired youth to not settle for anything less than perfection with his silver tongue. For Jean, their good friend, they would bring the best to her so that she would be inclined to attend subsequent festivals after with them instead of being content watching through paned windows.
That was of course, an excuse. A lie.
Kaeya had always been selfish. He just wanted to spend some time with Diluc.
His visions had long told him that the amount of peaceful days he could have with Diluc would be little.
Too little.
After all, when his fragile facade fell apart, who would be willing to dance with someone donning a prettified glass mask of lies, surrounded by shattered hopes, to have their feet stained bloody by trampled dreams?
...he needs something to drink. Kaeya doesn’t think he’s going to survive a night of visions if he didn’t.
They never showed him what he needed to know most.
(That Crepus would die.)
Only what he feared most.
(That Diluc would leave.)
--
We could have been so good together.
We could have lived this dance forever.
But now who’s gonna dance with me?
Please stay.
--
In Kaeya’s unconsciousness, Diluc and Kaeya danced.
In the past, they used to dance a dance of happiness. Of joy. Of hope. Of a beautiful, beautiful youth.
Later, on the night when they both lost everything, they danced a dance of blades. Of sorrow. Of disappointment. Of a blinding, blinding grief.
In the present, they danced around each other, but never together.
And lastly, in the future, they would dance a final dance of-
Maybe it’s better this way.
We’d only hurt each other with the words we want to say.
And I’m never gonna dance again.
Guilty feet have got no rhythm.