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Had the morning light in your bedroom always been this blindingly bright? Isn’t this why you’d invested in blackout blinds? You sat up blearily, your head pounding delightfully from your hangover, and realised three things all at once. One, you were not in your apartment, hence the lack of blackout blinds. Two, you were not wearing the clothes you’d worn last night. In fact you seemed to only be wearing a t-shirt and your underwear. And three, there was a man spooning you from behind. With his morning boner pressed against your ass. So technically four things. You sat up quickly, earning a disgruntled sound from the man in the bed and another shooting pain behind your eyes.
"What are you doing?" The boy mumbled into the pillow, and a feeling of relief flooded over you as you saw your best friend lying beside you. Then you remembered the fact that both of you were half naked and your memory of last night was hazy at best and suddenly felt a little less relieved.
"Closing these damn curtains for a start." you muttered, stumbling out of the bed to yank them closed.
"Wait a second." Taehyung’s voice suddenly sounded much more awake. When you turned back around he was sitting up in bed, a hand running through his messy curls. "Did we?" he looked down at his bare chest, then back at you wearing one of his t-shirts, then back down at the semi which was still distractingly visible through his sweatpants. "Did we have sex last night?"
"Oh my god, shut the fuck up." you groaned, collapsing back onto the bed and throwing a pillow at him as you did so.
"That wasn’t a no." he pointed out, a lazy grin on his face.
"No, we did not Taehyung. I was wasted last night but I wasn’t that wasted." you rolled your eyes.
"Damn that’s too bad." he sighed, pulling you back in closer under the covers.
"Bro! Can you please do something about that morning wood?" you protested through your giggles as you pushed him away.
"Not my fault I was sleeping with your bare ass against me bro." he grumbled, continuing with his mission to try and pull you back into a cuddle.
"Hey! I have underwear on thank you very much." you countered, finally letting yourself be pulled against Taehyung’s chest.
"Barely." he said, his breath tickling your ear as he teasingly snapped the waistband of your lace thong. You’d been out clubbing after all, you didn’t know if you were getting laid or not, it was a fancy underwear kind of occasion.
"How are you like this even at-" you paused to grab your phone, groaning at the time displayed on the screen. "Seven eighteen in the morning? While also disgustingly hungover?"
"I’m not disgustingly hungover. Some of us can actually handle our drink you know." he chuckled, the reverberations echoing through his chest and through yours as you laughed with him.
"Why did you let me go shot for shot with Jeongguk? That kid can really put away his tequila." you groaned again remembering the copious amounts of shots you’d done. Some of them off Jeongguk’s stomach, if your memory was correct.
"Funny." Taehyung answered simply as you felt him shrug against you.
"Drunk you has a lot to answer for." you said ruefully, leaning over to grab the glass of water you’d thankfully left by the side of the bed last night.
"Yeah he does." Taehyung said softly, almost to himself.
"What do you mean?" you asked.
"Well I was kinda counting on drunk me to finally make a move last night." he said nonchalantly, as you very un-nonchalantly choked on your sip of water.
"To finally what?" you said, though you’d heard him perfectly well.
"Although to be fair, I’d rather you were sober so you could properly enjoy yourself." he continued with a grin you knew all too well spreading across his face.
"Oh so you think I’d enjoy myself?" you replied, recovering as you realised he was joking.
Some people (read: mostly Yoongi because he said it was gross) didn’t really understand your and Taehyung’s flirty-bordering-on-inappropriate humour, but it was just the way you two had always been together.
At the start you couldn’t help but wonder if it would ever turn into anything more, but as the years passed you convinced yourself that you were happy like this. I mean, was it really the worst thing in the world to have a best friend that looked like Taehyung who also told you that your tits looked great on a regular basis? Namjoon was the only person not convinced by this, and regularly told both of you (unbeknownst to the other) to get your shit together and just admit you’d been in love since the day you’d met. To Namjoon’s eternal frustration, both of you refused.
"Yeah, I do." Taehyung replied, propping himself up on one elbow as he looked at you.
You took the moment to look back at him, and really look. The way the morning light struggling through the curtains still made his dark eyes shine. The way his sleep rumpled curls tumbled over his forehead in perfect disarray. The way his full lips were curved into that smile that never failed to bring one to your own face. Your eyes trailed down over his collarbones, his broad shoulders, the soft gold of his skin.
"Pretty confident about that, hmm?" you quickly returned your gaze to his face before he noticed your eyes roaming over him.
"Considering the way you were just checking me out, yeah I reckon so." Dammit. So maybe he’d noticed.
"You know if your head gets any bigger you’re not gonna be able to wear those baseball caps you’re always stealing from Yoongi." you retorted, going back to your tried and tested method of dealing with your feelings for Taehyung: deflect with humor.
"Don’t worry, we don’t need to wear anything for what I have planned." he quipped back.
"Tae, do any of these lines actually work on the girls you try them on?" you chuckled.
"Yeah they work on pretty much everyone but you ___." You were surprised when Taehyung sighed, flopping down onto his back beside you once more.
"Well do you...want them to work?" you spoke after a moment of silence, your voice hesitant.
"What do you think?" he asked.
"I don’t know." you mumbled under your breath, staring resolutely at the ceiling to avoid Taehyung’s gaze which you could feel burning into you.
"___ look at me."
You were frozen, unable to do as he asked as a million different thoughts raced through your mind.
"___." he said softly, a hand reaching up to cup your cheek and gently tilt your face towards him. "I don’t think I know how to say this any more clearly at this point, but I would very much like to fuck you."
"If you’re joking right now I swear I’m gonna kill you." you said quietly, your eyes finally meeting his.
"I know we joke about shit like this a lot, but I promise I’m serious right now." Taehyung said, his hand still lingering on your cheek. "Wait, why would you kill me if I was-?" a confused expression suddenly flitted across his face as he processed your words.
"Because it would be really embarrassing if I did this and you were just joking." Before Taehyung could say anything else you were closing the distance between you and bringing your lips to his.
You’d been kissed by Taehyung before of course. You don’t think you could count the number of forehead, cheek and shoulder kisses he’d lightly brushed to your skin over the years.
But this was different.
For a split second the touch of his lips was feather light against your own, but then his other hand found your waist and he was pulling you closer as his mouth pressed hungrily against yours. Your arms wound around his neck and you pulled him closer still, skin against skin as you felt the thrum of his heartbeat through his bare chest. A low moan escaped from the back of your throat and Taehyung finally pulled away.
"I can’t believe I spent all those years trying to think up clever ways to tell you when I could have just said it straight up." he said, leaning back in again to kiss you through his laughter.
"I can’t believe I spent all those years missing your incredibly unsubtle hints." you laughed back.
"We’ve always been two halves of a whole idiot." Taehyung mused, unable to resist leaving another kiss at the corner of your mouth.
"There’s no one I’d rather fuck around with." you smiled fondly, fingers playing with the soft curls at the nape of his neck.
"I’m so glad that our fucking around now includes actual fucking." he hummed appreciatively as he rolled his hips against yours.
"I see you didn’t do anything about that morning wood." you teased as you felt him pressed hot and hard against you.
"I was kind of hoping you’d help me out there." he smirked in the way that only Taehyung could.
"You’re lucky I’m such a helpful friend." you murmured as you began to grind against him.
"I am lucky." Taehyung’s voice was muffled as his lips trailed down your neck but you still heard him, and your heart ached at the sincerity contained in his words. "Gonna make you feel so good ___. Gonna fuck you so good, I promise."
"I trust you Tae." You put a finger under his chin to tilt his face back up towards you and when your eyes locked you knew that there was something deeper behind that promise.
Before you could pay too much attention to that aching feeling in your chest again, his lips had found yours and that was suddenly all that mattered. His hands skimmed over your body as if he didn’t even know where he wanted to touch you first.
His fingers soon found the hem of your (well technically his) t-shirt and he tugged it over your head. You expected some kind of appreciative comment about your boobs (it wouldn’t be the first) but instead there was a hushed silence which filled you with nerves. Were you not what he’d been expecting? What he’d been hoping for? You knew that your body didn’t look like his, but then again you didn’t know many people who looked like they were a long lost Greek demigod.
"What, you’ve never seen a girl naked before?" you quipped lightly, anything to break the quiet which had fallen as his eyes roved over you.
"Can you just let me appreciate how beautiful you are for a second?" Taehyung said seriously.
You felt a blush creeping up your cheeks at his words and instinctively moved to cover some of your nakedness with your hands. Before you could, you found Taehyung’s fingers loosely encircling your wrist, holding your hand back.
"So fucking beautiful." he said again, a look of wonder on his face. You couldn’t believe he was the one looking at you like that, when it felt like ever since you’d met him you’d been struck at least ten times a day by how beautiful he was.
"You know just what to say." you rolled your eyes fondly, bringing him in for a kiss.
He kissed you back deeply, but when he pulled away he nudged his nose gently against yours, pausing for a moment. "I mean it you know."
"I know you do." you said, and you realised you knew it was true. Your hand reached up to cup his face, your thumb trailing across his full bottom lip. You suddenly leaned in to kiss the freckle hidden there at the corner of his mouth. "I’ve always wanted to do that." you giggled shyly.
"Do what?" he asked with a giggle of his own.
"Your freckle right there." you said, brushing another kiss to the same spot. "I’ve always wanted to kiss it."
"If we’re talking about things we’ve always wanted..." Taehyung’s words trailed off as his hands trailed down your body and to the hem of your lace thong once more.
"As much as I trust you’d make a great baby daddy after watching you with Yeontan, you have condoms right?" you asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Fuck." A look of pure panic flashed across Taehyung's face as he looked up. "I think I do? I should do? I must do..." he said as he leaned over and began to search through his bedside table as you laughed.
"You were about to risk it all huh?" you teased as you watched him.
"You were kinda making it hard to think straight." he tossed a lopsided grin back at you as he got up from the bed and directed his search to his desk.
"Bro how much stuff do you keep in there?" you laughed as Taehyung searched through yet another drawer.
"Can you not call me bro right now?" he laughed back, scrunching up his nose in distaste.
"Oh come on, I bet you let Jeongguk call you bro when you guys fuck." you rolled your eyes teasingly.
"Hey that was ONE time!" Taehyung said indignantly. Suddenly he turned around, a condom held aloft triumphantly in his hand. "Anyway we didn’t fuck we just-" As he walked back over to the bed you held a finger up to shush him.
"I don’t need all the details." you protested.
"You were the one who brought it up!" Taehyung pouted.
"My bad." you chuckled. Your laughter trailed off as you watched Taehyung shimmy out of his sweatpants and kick them to the side as he walked back towards you.
"Like what you see?" he teased as he watched your eyes drink him in. The mischievous smile on his face that you knew so well, coupled with this new sight of his nearly naked body, made your head spin.
"Is this weird?" you blurted out suddenly. You looked up at Taehyung, trying to gauge his reaction. He paused for a moment before sitting down on the bed once more beside you.
"I guess it’s a little weird." he acknowledged with a soft smile. "But we can stop whenever you want you know?"
"That’s the problem though." you sighed. "I really, really don’t want to stop." you leaned in to capture Taehyung’s lips with your own, gasping when he took the chance to slip his tongue into your mouth.
"Neither do I." he murmured when you both finally pulled apart.
"So we’re doing this?" you asked, still breathless from the kiss.
"We’re doing this." he nodded, pushing you down so you were caged between his arms. "I told you, I want to make you feel good."
His words were punctuated with kisses that trailed down the column of your throat and across your collarbones. Even though his touch was featherlight, it felt like his lips left a trail of fire under your skin. You sucked in a shaky breath, your whole body held taut.
"You okay baby?" he asked, concern flitting through his dark eyes as he regarded you.
"Baby feels just as weird as bro." you said, and it was your turn to wrinkle your nose in distaste. Hearing the way the word dropped so easily from his lips you couldn’t help but think of all the other girls who’d heard the pet name from him in this very bed.
"___." he shook his head with a smile, and the fondness in his tone made your chest ache. "It’s still just me, it’s still just us." This time when he leaned in to kiss you it wasn’t rushed or heated or eager for more. It was soft and deliberate and slow. "You don’t need to call me anything else if you don’t want to. My name sounds pretty enough on your lips." Before you had time to react he was dipping his head down to suck a delicate bruise to the junction between your jaw and throat and you were barely aware of the moan that escaped you.
"Tae..." you whimpered as his tongue flicked out to soothe the skin marked by his lips.
"Just like that." he smirked. His hands came up to cup your breasts, long fingers teasing at your nipple.
"Oh Tae, just like that." you groaned, not even realising as you mirrored his words back to him.
His dark eyes never leaving yours, he dipped his head down to capture your nipple between his teeth, nipping and sucking at the sensitive bud. Your moan this time was high pitched and breathy as you looked back at him, marvelling at how beautiful he looked like this. He released your nipple with a pleased sounding pop, the smirk already returning to his lips.
"Like that huh?" he hummed, his voice even deeper than usual, laced with desire.
"Like that." you repeated his words again, barely taking a second to catch your breath before you were seeking his mouth again for another kiss.
"So pretty." he murmured to you as he took your other nipple in his mouth this time. "So pretty when you moan for me." He added just as another moan escaped your lips as his tongue darted across your skin. "Bet you’ll sound just as pretty when you’re cumming for me too."
"You think so, hmm?" you managed to gasp out between kisses as your fingers knotted in Taehyung’s already disheveled curls.
"I did promise you." he said, and behind the eyes hooded with lust you could still see the playful glint you recognised from your best friend.
"Prove it then." you challenged, and the words had barely left your lips before his hands were gripping your hips and pulling you impossibly closer.
~~~
The day passed in a state of, well, incredibly smug bliss.
You had fallen back asleep in a mess of tangled limbs after Taehyung had made good on his promise and given you a frankly obscene amount of orgasms for that time of the morning. And when you’d woken up he did it all over again.
Unable to tear yourselves away you spent hours wrapped in each other's arms, reminiscing on moments when you’d almost confessed how you felt, when you’d been convinced the other was going to confess, laughing at how close to the truth both of you had been for so long without ever realising. The lazy late summer afternoon slowly bled into a dusky evening and still you couldn’t bear to leave, the outside world forgotten completely and replaced by your new home here under the cool white sheets with Taehyung.
As night drew in you found yourself lying with your head pillowed on his chest as his fingers gently combed through your hair and he sung half finished songs to you, humming in the parts he hadn’t written lyrics for yet. It almost felt like nothing had changed, the familiar sounds of his voice lulling you to sleep the way he’d done for years. But you were hyper aware of your bare skin against his, the lingering taste of him on your tongue, the sense that once this day was over you’d lose it forever. And you might never find your way back.
"I can only see you, you’re the only one I see." The words Taehyung were singing softly made your breath catch in your throat. "Look, I’m fair with everyone else but you, now I can’t live a day without you."
The low rumbling thunder of an approaching summer storm made Taehyung pause for a moment, and it’s like you were snapped out of a trance. You pulled the sheets off you as you sat up, shivering as the cold night air hit your bare skin.
"I should go." you mumbled, almost to yourself.
"___? What are you talking about? It’s late, you can just sleep here again." Taehyung’s voice was laced with confusion as he reached out towards you.
"Oh god Tae. We should not have done that." Your head dropped into your hands as another rumble of thunder sounded in the distance.
"You’re going to have to be a little more specific." Taehyung swung his legs over the edge of the bed so he was sitting next to you. "Do you mean the first time this morning, or the time after that in the shower, or the time on the couch this afternoon, or that time just then?"
"You’re so not being helpful right now." you groaned, standing up and trying to figure out where all of your things had ended up on Taehyung’s floor.
The sound of the clouds finally breaking and rain drumming down on the roof above you brought you crashing back to reality. Talk about pathetic fallacy.
As Taehyung had sung those words you found yourself agonising over whether they’d been for you, in a way you’d never dared to think about before. For the first time the sound of your best friend's voice had brought you pain rather than comfort, and you hated the thought. What you’d had before had been safe, familiar. It had been enough to love him from afar knowing that you’d never have to stop. But replaying those words ‘I can’t live a day without you’ had made you imagine a day when he could live without you. When your love story had played out. And you’d rather have no love story at all than a story where Taehyung wasn’t by your side.
A sudden flash of lightning startled you from your thoughts and you froze for a second. Before you knew it Taehyung was standing in front of you, his warm palms cupping your face as he looked down at you.
"___ can you please stop freaking out for a second."
"I’m not freaking out." you protested.
"Your dress is on backwards." he pointed out.
"Oh." Glancing down you realised he was right. Seriously regretting your outfit choice from the night before of a mini dress and heels (damn Jeongguk’s bougie taste in nightclubs) you shuffled the dress the right way round. "Thanks."
"Can we just-" you cut Taehyung off before he could finish his sentence, ducking away to grab your bag and head towards the door.
"I promise we’ll talk later Tae, I just need to get home. I’ll call you when I’m back, I just...I just need to go."
As you closed the door behind you Taehyung’s call of ‘Wait!’ echoed painfully in your ears.
Running down the stairs as fast as you could in your heels you stumbled as you pushed through the front door, the rain soaking you almost instantly as you stood still for a moment and drew in a shaky breath. You began the walk back to your apartment, phone battery long dead so an Uber was out of the question. You’d only been walking for a few minutes before a pair of headlights appeared on the empty road and a familiar car appeared beside you.
"___." Taehyung had pulled up beside you, the window rolled down as he leaned across the front seats towards you. "Can you get in the car please?"
"I’m going home Tae, I told you." This was not a good time for both of your stubborn personalities to come into play. Yet here you were.
"Can you please get in the car?" he asked again, driving along inch by inch beside you.
"You’re wasting your time." you said defiantly, pushing your rain soaked hair out of your face.
"Out of all of the dumb rom-com tropes we could be living right now, this would not have been my first choice." Taehyung said with a shake of his head.
"Can you please be serious about something for 30 seconds?" you shot back.
"I am serious. There are so many other better tropes." Usually you loved Taehyung’s particular style of deadpan delivery, but right now was not the time.
"This isn’t a fucking rom-com okay?" your voice echoed in the empty street. "Things like this never work out in real life."
"Things like what?"
"Don’t play dumb with me Kim Taehyung, I know you look stupid but you’re not really." you crossed your arms over your chest, trying to make it look like a pose of defiance rather than desperately trying to keep yourself warm as the rain poured down.
"Okay we’re not even going to get into the fact that you think I “look stupid” right now." Taehyung took his hands off the wheel to place air quotes around the words. "But I still don’t understand why you’re so upset."
"I don’t understand why you’re not upset!" you exclaimed. "Friends aren’t supposed to do stuff like that Tae, it never ends well."
"But you haven’t even given it a chance!" Both of your voices were rising as you continued to walk and Taehyung continued to drive alongside you.
"Because I know how it ends! Someone’s going to end up getting hurt because someone’s going to end up falling in love."
And that someone will be me, you added silently in your head. You were so wrapped up in your own thoughts that you were almost convinced you’d imagined the next words that burst out of Taehyung’s mouth.
"Well what if someone already has!"
"What do you-" The words trailed off as you looked in disbelief at your best friend.
"God this is so not how I planned on telling you." he sighed, lowering his head to rest on the steering wheel for a second.
"Tell me what?" you managed to ask this time.
"Well now look who’s playing dumb." Taehyung raised an eyebrow at you.
A hundred different responses raced through your mind but you suddenly found yourself rooted to the ground. The car finally came to a stop beside you.
"Can you please just get in the car so I don’t have to yell at you out the window like a creepy old man?"
You let out a sound that was somewhere between a sob and a laugh because at this point you had no idea what you were feeling, and before you had the chance to walk over to him Taehyung was putting on his hazard lights and leaping out of the car to join you on the pavement.
"Hi." he said quietly, tucking a strand of wet hair behind your ear.
"Hi." you replied simply.
"If you hadn’t decided to try and drown us in this rain..." Taehyung chuckled as he shook drops of water from his hair. "I was kinda thinking about telling you this in bed earlier. But I guess here will have to do."
"Tae..." you began softly, but this time it was his turn to cut you off.
"I just need to tell you this, okay?" he pleaded, taking both your hands in his. You nodded silently for him to continue.
"This morning, this whole day really, I felt like I was dreaming. I honestly never believed you’d ever see me...the way I see you. But then when you kissed me, when you talked about all those times you wished you’d kissed me before...I realised maybe it wasn’t all as one sided as I thought. Because god when I said I wanted to fuck you I meant that, I really did." he chuckled and you couldn’t but let out a small laugh too at the earnest smile on his face. "But I want to do so much more than that as well. I want all of the other tiny moments from today, singing in the shower, dancing as we do the dishes, falling asleep with you in my arms knowing you’ll be there when I wake up. I know you think you know how this ends but, give me a chance to prove you wrong."
You took a moment to look at Taehyung as he stood before you, and just like before, to really look. At the water beading on his eyelashes as he stood in the pouring rain for you. At the gentle determination in his eyes as he held your gaze. At the face you'd known and loved for years, who had always cared for and protected you. Maybe you wouldn't have to live that day without him.
"You know how much I hate being wrong but.." A smile tugged at the corner of your lips. "I think this time I can make an exception."
"God that's an annoying way of saying I love you too." Taehyung rolled his eyes.
"Kim Taehyung I fucking love you!" you yelled suddenly, head tipped back towards the sky.
"____ I love-"
"Can you shut the hell up?" A voice shouted back from an apartment window nearby and you both dissolved into laugher. Taehyung pulled you in for a messy kiss that was all clashing teeth and tongues as you pressed your smiles into each other's mouths.
"I fucking love you too." he said, more quietly this time. "But for the last time, can we please get in the car now?"
"Yeah I think I made my point." You conceded, grinning as Taehyung rolled his eyes at you once more. "They really make the whole kissing in the rain thing look a whole lot more romantic in Breakfast at Tiffany's." You mused as you opened the car door. "Maybe it's because we didn't have a cat."
"I mean Yeontan is right there back at my place." Taehyung pointed out.
"I guess we could go back to your place...just for Yeontan though." you said teasingly as you put on your seatbelt.
"And also because you love me." Taehyung grinned at you.
"And also because I love you." you couldn't help but grin back. "You're gonna be so annoying about this aren't you?"
"You have no idea."
~~~