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The three-day weekend was finally here and Iruka was sprawled out on the couch, dipping animal crackers in a jar of peanut butter while he watched the shows on Food Network as they came on.
Kakashi was outside doing god-knows-what as per usual. Iruka never knew what his husband was up to until he was faced with the evidence… which varied . He was just as likely to see the video pop up on his Instagram as he was to be ambushed with a creation. That’s what he got for being married to an eccentric, prestigious, and prodigious engineer.
As if right on cue, Iruka heard the grating sound of glass shattering emanating from their backyard, quickly followed by a cackle and an exasperated Tenzo asking if everything was alright.
This was a typical series of events, nothing out of the ordinary, so Iruka didn’t think much of it. He continued to eat his peanut butter-slathered animal crackers while watching some dude named Guy Fieri troll chefs in a supermarket cooking show.
Another school week went by and Iruka forgot about Kakashi’s most recent side-project.
It was finally Saturday, which meant relaxing on the couch and some reality TV—and also harassing his husband.
Iruka was sitting on the couch when the door to Kakashi’s office opened and Kakashi walked out. He walked into the living room, reaching his hands to the ceiling as he stretched, eyes squeezed shut as he groaned in relief. Iruka shamelessly let his eyes rake over the skin exposed as his t-shirt rode up. In situations like this, Iruka would jump him immediately…
Instead, he raised his arm, hand tightly gripping a small-sized nerf gun, and aimed it at Kakashi’s chest. He pulled the trigger and the tiny foam projectile arced through the air and hit Kakashi directly on the sternum.
Kakashi’s eyes shot open and Iruka grinned victoriously. “Hey, stranger. I didn’t think I’d see you today.” He teased.
“Did you seriously just shoot me with a nerf gun?” Kakashi laughed as he walked further into the living room, stopping next to the coffee table. “Where did you even get that?”
“I confiscated it of course. It’s one of the perks of being a teacher.” Iruka said, pulling the trigger again and shooting Kakashi in the stomach with another dart. The gun was one of the bulky-looking revolver nerf guns that only shot six darts per reload.
“Rude as hell!” Kakashi protested weakly as he tried and failed to bat the projectile away. “Aren’t you supposed to return the stuff at the end of the day or something?”
Iruka bit his lip, trying not to laugh as he shot Kakashi again. This time Kakashi was prepared and the dart got slapped to the carpet.
“Kushina told me to keep it. It was the third time this month that Naruto has brought it to school. He managed to shoot Sasuke with it a few times while my back was turned.”
“And then he shot you with it, didn’t he?” Kakashi snickered.
Iruka sent another dart hurtling towards Kakashi's head, only for it to get stuck in his hair instead.
“Yep!” Iruka managed to say as he cackled.
Kakashi put his hands on his hips and gave Iruka a look, not impressed in the least about being used as target practice. “You better knock it off.”
Iruka grinned and took aim. “Or what?” He questioned, challenging Kakashi. This time he hit Kakashi’s thigh.
Kakashi’s eyes narrowed and then he stalked off toward the backyard, but not before Iruka shot his final dart at his husband’s ass.
Iruka heard the backdoor open and close, and it was another few minutes before he heard it again; by that time, he was distracted by an episode of The Circle. The squawk that escaped him as a solid projectile unexpectedly hit him in the arm was loud and embarrassing.
Kakashi’s laughter filled the room, it had him practically bent in half with it.
“Kakashi Hatake! Is that a giant ass nerf gun?” Iruka asked in disbelief as he got up off the couch. “Is that what you have been building out there?”
Kakashi’s giant DIY gun matched the design of the nerf gun he had taken from Naruto yesterday.
Kakashi only nodded his head in affirmation as he wheezed.
Iruka’s eye twitched as he stared down at the projectile. It looked like it had been made out of a pool noodle and a— “Is that a fucking toilet plunger?” Iruka pointed down at it accusingly, outraged.
When Kakashi finally got a hold of himself, he hefted the giant ass nerf gun into his arms again, pointing it at Iruka. “I wanted to make a replica of the darts.” He shrugged and turned the revolving wheel containing the darts.
“Do not shoot that at me again,” Iruka commanded, shaking a finger at Kakashi threateningly.
Kakashi aimed just to Iruka’s left and shot another dart. Iruka was very aware of the soft fwoop’ing sound this time as the dart hit the cushion of the couch with a muffled smack.
“Do. Not. Test. Me.” Iruka bit out, but Kakashi’s grin only widened.
Kakashi turned the wheel again, preparing the next shot as he aimed at Iruka once more.
“I’m going to murder you!” Iruka yelled as he made a break for it, hopping over the back of the couch.
Then Kakashi shot him in the ass.