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Yang snickered as her eyes scanned the page. Oh boy, this book was so terrible it was hilarious. “My lord,” the knight asked, “are you sure you want us to kill the dragon? It’s done wonders for the tourist industry.” “Yes, and now it wants a percentage. And a holiday cave on the south coast!”
“Good book?” the black-haired girl behind the counter asked, her voice easily carrying over the smooth jazz playing in the deserted coffeehouse.
“Oh yeah,” Yang answered back, embarrassed. “This is, like, my fourth or fifth time reading it, and it still leaves me in stitches. I don’t normally go in for this swords and sorcery stuff but my sister gave it to me as a gag gift for my birthday. Enormous box, full of shredded paper, with this taped to the inside of the lid. This, uh, Belladonna guy, he doesn’t pull any punches. It’s a, um, it’s a, what’s that word, sounds like a bird, making fun of something? That’s what it is.”
“Parody?”
“That’s it,” Yang said, glancing at her watch.
The barista stopped in mid-motion, a book of her own in hand. “Waiting for someone? I keep seeing you check your watch.”
“Yeah.” The blonde let out a sigh. “One of my coworkers set me up on a blind date. Didn’t give me a name, or a picture, or anything, just said she knew we’d love each other.”
“Oh.” Now the other woman looked depressed. She’d probably been hoping for something more interesting. Yang couldn’t blame her. She’d been sitting here for—another quick check of her watch—half an hour past the agreed meeting time and was seriously starting to wonder if she’d been stood up.
Or just been had. Yang killed ten minutes planning elaborate revenge against her coworker, then discarded it with a shake of her head. Pyrrha wasn’t the type to make jokes about something like this. She was just in love with the idea of being in love. Now if she’d just get off the stick and ask out that courier guy she kept making googly eyes at and keep out of everybody else’s love life. Including and especially one Yang Xiao Long. Hmm, maybe Yang would just trip the big dumb doofus next time he made a delivery so he fell on Pyrrha. It worked in those stupid cartoons her sister was always watching.
No, Yang was pretty sure she’d been stood up. Just her luck. With another sigh, Yang slid the slip of paper she was using as a bookmark between the pages and slipped the book into her purse. “Think I’m going to jet. What do I owe you?”
The black-haired woman shrugged, the feline ears on top of her head twitching. “Don’t worry about it, it’s on me. All you drank was black coffee.”
“Nah, I’ll pay for it, I don’t want to get you in trouble with your boss.”
“It’s okay, I’m-”
The jingling of the bell over the door interrupted her. “Sorry I’m late, my car wouldn’t start, so I had to get it towed, and-Yang, what are you doing here?” Weiss crossed her arms, frowning at Yang.
Who shrugged in surrender. “Getting stood up, apparently. I got set up on a blind date by a coworker and-”
“Pyrrha,” Weiss hissed.
“Yeah, how’d you-” Realization dawned, and Yang could feel her hands balling into fists. “I’m gonna kill her.”
“You’ll have to beat me to her.”
“Hey, I’ve got a working motorcycle and you,” Yang pointed at Weiss, “have a car in the garage and probably took a cab here, am I right?”
“Everything okay?” the barista asked, in the time-worn tone of someone who knows everything is most definitely okay but is trying to figure out if they should ask people to leave or call the police.
“Yeah, just peach,” Yang answered settling back in her seat. “My coworker set me up-”
“-with her sister’s ex-girlfriend,” Weiss finished, dropping down in the seat opposite and cradling her head in her hands. “This is all my fault.”
“No, I was complaining to her about how bad my last date was,” Yang said, shaking her head. “She’s kind of become my go-to for post-terrible date venting.”
“No, it’s my fault,” Weiss admitted. “Since Ruby and I broke up, I may have gotten a bit maudlin and drunk-called Pyrrha.”
“Eh, that kind of thing happens. You and Ruby were together for years.”
“Repeatedly. Very late at night. And cried at her for hours.”
“Oh.” Yang drummed her fingers on the table for a few moments, not sure what else to say. “I, uh, I never said thanks for getting me into the advanced prosthetics program. The new arm, it works really good.” She held it up, wriggling her fingers to demonstrate. “Full range of motion, really great sense of touch. Not great about heat, though. I managed to melt the sensor pad on the palm on my stove. They tell me it’s just a matter of calibration.”
Weiss sighed, looking up to stare at the ceiling. “I didn’t do anything but get you the forms, Yang. You got through the selection process on your own.” Now she smiled at Yang. “I missed hanging out with you, you know.”
“Yeah, well…”
“Yes.” The white-haired young woman cleared her throat. “So, how have you been?”
“You don’t care about me.” Yang leaned forward. “Ask the question you really want an answer to.”
“Fine.” With an air of resignation, Weiss asked, “So, how is Ruby?”
“Not seeing anyone. She still misses you, you know.”
“But-” Weiss chewed her lip. “She was so angry at me.”
“Love ain’t all love and roses, you know. Pun unintended.” Yang shrugged. “I know it’s been a few months, but you should at least talk to her. Maybe clear the air a little bit.” And stop my little sister from moping so much, Yang thought to herself.
Weiss reached into her purse. “Okay, I’ll call her.”
“Nah, go see her. I happen to know she’s home playing video games. ‘Home’ in this case being my apartment. She’s been staying with me since you two had your fight.”
Now the heiress to the Schnee fortune raised an eyebrow. “I notice you didn’t use the words ‘broke up.’”
Yang smiled. “Because I know she’s not over you. And it sounds like you’re not over her either. Go on. You still remember I live?”
“I haven’t suddenly become an idiot in the past three months, Yang.” Weiss stood, adjusting her purse strap. “And… thank you.”
“Hey, before you go, let's get even with Pyrrha for meddling in our love lives.” Yang pulled out her phone. “We’ll text her at the same time, something like, ‘Having a wonderful time with my sister’s ex-girlfriend. Not.’”
“No, better they’re not identical, she will suspect collusion. I’ll send, ‘Do you realize you set me up with my ex-girlfriend’s sister?’”
“Perfect.”
After Weiss had left, Yang pulled her book out of her purse. “Well, I’d better not go home for a few hours. If things go the way I have a hunch they might, they’ll need some time to get it out of their system. Mind if I hang out here?”
“No, I guess I can run you a tab. Normally that’s against our policy, but I’m the owner, so I won’t tell me if you don’t tell me.” She winked at Yang and reached into the case. “And for being a good sister, friend, and your questionable taste in literature, I’ll even throw in a free slice of our genocide by chocolate cheesecake.”
As the barista, no, the coffeehouse's owner slid the plate onto the table in front of Yang, her phone buzzed. I’m sorry! the message from Pyrrha read. Don’t hate me, I was trying to help.
As punishment, you have to ask blondie out for coffee next time he makes a delivery. I know someplace nice Yang sent back. As she picked up her fork, a book thumped on the table. “What’s this?” Yang asked, looking at the cover. Swordquest of Swords II: Tail of the Sauceror the cover read. “The sequel? But it’s not out yet. I don’t think they’ve even sent these out to critics yet.”
“I know the author. Here,” And she snatched it out of Yang’s hand, scribbling something inside before handing it back. “And now it’s a signed copy.”
Sure enough, the inside bore the signature of one B. Belladonna, just like the cover. And a phone number. “You know, I gotta ask… what’s the ‘B’ stand for? Nobody seems to know.?”
“Blake.”
Blake. Huh. Yang caught herself copying Weiss’s lip-chewing as she turned to the first page. Well, the date might not have gone the way she expected, but the day hadn’t been a total loss.
Out of the corner of her eye, Yang saw Blake glancing at her. No. not a total loss after all.