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“Aether! Don’t you dare!”
There’s desperation dripping from his voice as Xiao yells out.
What lays before him is a scene he can’t comprehend—no, he understands it completely, understands the faint smile on the other’s lips as so many emotions fill his golden eyes, understands that Aether has made up his mind about something and will feel absolutely no regret when he goes through with it.
Xiao understands it all, but he doesn’t want to.
He doesn’t want to accept it, because it means he’ll lose Aether forever.
But he can’t reach him, no matter how hard he tries. It’s as though an invisible force is holding him back, as if the blond’s will has manifested and is making sure that nothing will interfere with his choice. Aether is stubborn—once he’s decided on something, he’s not the type to budge. Xiao had once found that endearing, but now he feels nothing but hatred for the way Aether refuses to listen to him.
Past his outstretched hand, through the fingers spread wide as if any sort of force he exerts will help him get a little bit closer, Xiao can see Aether standing still. A shiver runs down his spine.
At his feet, behind him, surrounding him, it’s all chaos. Darkness and death are all that’s left in his wake. He’s fought with every ounce of his being to get to where he is, destroyed anything that tried to stop him without a second thought. Karma be damned, he just needed to reach him .
Where Aether stands though, there’s nothing but peace. It’s as though time has stopped, the beauty surrounding him frozen in time.
At Aether’s feet lies his sister.
His sister, the person who everything he had done up to this point had been for. During their travels, Aether had often shared stories about his sister. In the beginning, Xiao hadn’t cared all that much. He had simply looked ahead, kept going, letting the tales of comfort and adventure slide off of him, disappearing into the air.
It wasn’t until Xiao actually looked at Aether as he spoke about his sister that he decided to listen.
Because the smile that blossomed over Aether’s lips as he spoke, recalling memories he shared with his most precious twin, was breathtaking.
Aether’s smile had been what Xiao had fallen in love with.
And his smile, along with so much else, was born from his love for his sister, who was now laying before him as nothing but a corpse.
“Aether!”
He calls out the boy’s name, over and over, but it never seems to reach him. Just as Xiao’s hands can’t reach him, his voice can’t either. And he understands, he does, because he knows just how precious his sister is to him. But Xiao can’t let this happen, he can’t.
Aether’s gaze never leaves the girl laying at his feet. She’s still and quiet, and a gentle breeze that shouldn’t exist among this moment of grief and anguish brushes over her.
Neither of them knew how it had come to this, but at some point, Aether had found a solution on his own. He’d kept it to himself, knowing that Xiao would never agree to it. But it was the only choice, and he’d do anything if it meant saving Lumine.
His fingers tighten around the grip of his sword for a moment, before relaxing.
Aether lifts his head, and Xiao can feel his breath being stolen from him as their eyes finally meet. It’s a look he knows so well, and his heart aches.
“Xiao.”
There it is.
Aether’s just calling his name, but Xiao knows this moment. The tone of his voice, the softness and heart poured into the single word. Xiao knows it all too well, because he’s experienced this moment so many times.
And now, Xiao feels like he’s breaking inside.
That smile, soft and beautiful and full of so much warmth, spreads across Aether’s lips.
“I love you.”
It hits him the same way it did like it was the first time. Every time he’s said those words, Xiao feels like it’s the first time. Aether, who wears his heart on his sleeve, had told Xiao those same words the first time they’d met. And Xiao, who had closed off his heart so long ago, had dismissed them without a second thought.
No.
But Aether had simply continued to repeat those words as their time together grew. And each time he did, a little bit more warmth had found its way into Xiao’s chest. Each time, the wall he’d build around his heart cracked, slowly being chipped away until the moment that Xiao had realized he wanted to reply differently.
He wanted to tell Aether yes .
But he never did, because letting himself feel something after so long brought so much fear. Could he handle having something within his grasp, and then eventually losing it again? Because Aether wasn’t meant to be here. He had a goal, he was searching for his sister. And surely once he found her, the journey would end.
Aether couldn’t stay with Xiao, and while the yaksha had been able to persevere through so much pain and suffering in his life, he knew that letting Aether slip through his fingers after accepting his love would ruin him.
So Aether had continued to tell him those words, and Xiao had continued to tell him no , even though they both knew that Xiao’s heart felt differently.
“I love you.”
Aether repeats those words, and Xiao flinches. He can’t help but find it cruel for Aether to say this now, when what he’s feared all this time seems like their impending reality.
Aether is planning to leave him.
“Aether.”
For the first time, his response changes. It’s not what Xiao wants to say to those words, but this moment is different.
“Do you have any idea what you’re doing right now?”
The warm smile on the blond’s lips becomes marred with sadness, and his gaze drops slightly. Aether is quiet, and for a moment, Xiao believes that the other is reconsidering his choice. But when Aether suddenly nods his head, that tiny sliver of hope is stolen from him.
“You don’t even know that you can change things.”
Aether knows that, knows that the solution he’s come to is nothing but crazy and illogical, knows that there’s no way to know that it’ll work, especially when he won’t be around to witness the effect it has.
“But…” His voice is soft, and Xiao can hear the sorrow he’s trying so hard to hold back. “If I don’t try, then what? I can’t…”
Golden orbs fall to take in the sight of the girl at his feet. Lumine, his sister, his most precious person is no longer there. Somehow, she’d truly been taken from him—taken somewhere he’d never be able to reach no matter how long he searched. The reality of the situation had almost swallowed him whole, left him with nothing.
But Aether wasn’t the type to give up, especially when it came to his sister.
His grip tightens on the sword once more and he lifts his head.
“I can’t just leave her like this. I can’t just not try! I have to do something!”
And Xiao hates how much he knows there’s no way he’ll be able to convince Aether otherwise. All he wants is to reach him, to take him into his arms and feel his warmth. He wants to give Aether the moment he desperately needs to face the truth and accept it, to break down and cry. Xiao wants to be Aether’s support. He knows that if he can reach Aether, he’ll never let go. He’ll change his reply this time.
But he can’t reach Aether, no matter how much he tries.
He could yell, argue, curse, cry, even beg, but he knows nothing will change Aether’s mind.
Because for Aether to love someone, means to give his life for them. And Aether loves Xiao, he loves him so much, but he loves Lumine too. And Lumine is the one that needs him.
A tear falls down Xiao’s cheek and before he realizes it, his lips are moving.
Aether’s eyes go wide, and he almost drops the sword to the ground.
“I love you.”
The words he’d always wanted to hear, the feelings he’s always wanted to be reciprocated, are being offered to him. And in this moment, Aether can do nothing but sob.
Maybe Xiao was the cruel one, his confession pushing Aether to make a choice between the two most important people in his life. He knew this was the only way to truly reach the other, so he had torn down the last of the walls left around his heart and laid it bare.
Because more than anything, Xiao simply wants to be with Aether.
A calm stillness surrounds them, and the chaos Xiao had brought with him is long gone, forgotten in this moment. All they can do is look into each other’s eyes, each trying to convey everything they feel while being unable to find the words to do so.
And as much as Xiao is trying to convince him to accept him, deep down he knows.
He knows that Aether could never choose to give up on his sister. He’d be left with a hole in his chest so large, that nothing would ever be able to fill it. Xiao could try, he would try, but he knows he would never truly be able to make Aether whole again.
His sister is like his other half, after all. They complete each other, which is why Aether eventually closes his eyes.
The smile on his lips is warm, the sadness leaving behind a gentle serenity—acceptance.
“Thank you, Xiao.”
Aether’s voice is carried by the gentle breeze, fluttering across the wide distance that separates them. He lifts his sword, and Xiao’s eyes go wide. And even though he’s now fighting against the invisible restraints with every fiber of his being, even though he feels like both his body and his heart are being torn to shreds, Xiao can’t reach him.
“Thank you for loving me all this time.”
The blade takes aim, and the raw desperation that fills Xiao rips a cry from his throat. He can’t find any words, but continues to scream.
“Please be happy, okay?”
A smile, filled with pure love and happiness, spreads across Aether’s lips as the blade thrusts into him, shattering his entire existence as his heart is pierced clean through.
Xiao can’t even make a sound, his throat burning as he simply chokes on his own tears.
All he could ever do was watch—all he ever let himself do was watch, as Aether gave every part of himself to his search for his sister. Maybe Xiao had always been afraid of this moment, afraid that in the end, she would always be chosen over him, even if that meant Aether giving up his life for hers to be spared.
Maybe if he had accepted Aether’s love from the start, things could have changed.
All Xiao feels is a cold regret as he watches Aether’s body fall to the ground, a steady pool of red spreading around him. The weight that held him back is gone, but Xiao can’t find it in him to move a single muscle, as if doing so would confirm that this wasn’t just a nightmare he could wake up from.
The smile remains on Aether’s lips as he feels himself slipping away, and in those final moments, all he wishes is for the two most important people in his life to be happy.