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To ourselves unjust

Summary:

In space, there's a lot of potential for a lot of things to go wrong. And Ryan has to deal with the aftermath.

Notes:

This is mostly unbeta'd, so I take full responsibility for all errors

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Ryan got woken up by the beeping of his viewscreen. It wasn’t the urgent beep of ‘oh-god-the-ship’s-about-to-blow-up, somebody do something’ that would usually come in at this time of night. So it actually took a while for Ryan to wake up and realise that it was, in fact, beeping. When he finally turned it on, he was confronted by the sight of a very grumpy and very wet young communications officer glaring at him.

“Ray?” he asked, still slightly befuddled from sleep. This wasn’t an emergency, he didn’t have to be up and running instantly. And he was in a safe place, so he didn’t have to instantly search for threats or enemies.

“I just took a shower that was as cold as fucking space, dude. Fucking fix it,” Ray scowled for good measure and turned off his viewscreen before Ryan could say anything more.

Ryan looked at the clock in the corner of the viewscreen, and mentally groaning, realised that he wouldn’t have enough time to go back to sleep before having to get back up again. Just as he got up, working the kinks out of his back (he’d fallen asleep in the engineering department- again) his viewscreen chimed again. He tapped it back on, and was greeted by the sight of a very annoyed science officer whose skin had turned an interesting shade of red.

“Ryan! The bloody shower’s running too hot! I nearly burned my skin off!” Gavin’s indigent squawks were loud enough that Ryan was secretly grateful he’d fallen asleep downstairs, there’d be no way in hell that Jack would have been able to sleep through that.

“What do you mean it's running hot? Ray just told me his shower was freezing.” Ryan ran a hair through his hair, idly noting that he really needed to get it cut.

“Well, it's not too cold, it's too bloody hot! I nearly boiled myself!” Gavin's squawks got even more indigent and even louder, causing Ryan to wince at the tone. Gavin had squawks that could raise the dead.

“You know, it's a good thing I'm not in my bunk. You're louder than the fucking klaxons here.” Ryan muttered.

“Did you fall asleep in Engineering again?” Gavin's voice instantly became quieter and accusing. “You know that's bad for you.”

“That's a bit rich coming from you, ‘Mr. I sleep in my lab because I'm too impatient to wait for results.’” Ryan laughed at Gavin's indigent expression. “But I'll look into it.” he clicked off the viewscreen and was actually able to stand up fully before the viewscreen beeped again. Annoyed, he grabbed it and began walking through the engineering department before clicking it on. A disgruntled Michael confronted him, water dripping off his nose. “Don't tell me, shower's either too hot or too cold.” Ryan's tone was somewhere between bored and amused, although his mind was racing over the possible problems that could be causing this.

“Fucking no. Shower fucking stopped in the middle of the goddamned shower. I had barely started the fucking shower. I'd like to fucking be able to take a goddamned shower asshole.” Michael all but punched the viewscreen off, leaving Ryan alone in the engineering department. Groaning mentally, he made his way to the filtration system area.

As he approached the area, he noticed just how oddly damp the air felt. There's the sound of dripping water, which immediately notified him of just how wrong things have gone. He quickly tapped out a message to Geoff, as well as one to Matt and Jeremy cordially requesting their presence (which wasn’t so much a request as a demand). He did this while jogging to the source of the dripping. It took him a while to find it amongst the mass of the pipes, but when he did find it, he could not suppress a groan. It's the main water pipe and there's a fairly substantial puddle growing beneath it.

Water's a valuable resource in space, but it takes up a lot of room and it's heavy. The systems designed to handle water are designed to be efficient, but they're carefully calibrated to use each drop of water to its full potential. The loss of even a small amount of water can play havoc with the entire system. A leak this size explains why everything's fucked up. They may not have enough water to sustain them now. Ryan quickly typed another message to Geoff, informing him of what he's found so far, and urging an order to limit water usage.

There's the sound of clattering feet, and a voice hotly blaming someone. Ryan fixes his face into one of his fiercest scowls, the one that can send ensigns running. Matt, outpacing his shorter comrade, received the full brunt of it. Jeremy, coming second, manages to almost hide behind Matt and avoid the full brunt of the patented Ryan glare.

“How the hell did this happen?” Ryan's voice was quiet menace, promising pain if he is not given a satisfactory answer.

To their credit, neither Matt or Jeremy cower or flinch away from it, but both looked Ryan in the face and each one assigned blame to themselves, and not the other.

“I tightened the auxiliary control value too much and probably cleaned the pipes wrong.”

“I forgot to hit the water shut-off, before I started working on the pipes.”

Ryan sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. It’s hard to remember just how young they are sometimes; it’s even harder to remember that he too was once that young. “We’ll assign blame later. Jeremy, hit the turnoff, then start patching the pipe. Matt, go get a siphon and try to get as much of the water as you can. Don’t put it back into the system, it needs to be repurified.”

Before either of them can answer, his viewscreen is beeping once again. He waved a hand at them, and they scurried off to try to fix the situation. Answering the viewscreen, he realises he still hasn’t eaten. He put that thought to the back of his mind though, he needs to get tasks done before he can eat. And it's not like he's not used to missing meals.

“Geoff,” he held up a hand before Geoff can speak, he doesn’t have time for accusations. Not that Geoff would normally accuse him, but the man’s been under a lot a stress lately. “Main water pipe’s sprung a leak. We’re working on fixing it and gathering up the spilled water, but no telling how much we’ll actually be able to gather. Or how long it’ll take to repurify it. Until we get it done, there’s gonna be a lot less water for everyone.”

“How much less water?” There are dark circles under Geoff’s eyes, another restless night for him as well. Flying this deep in UNIS territory has to be nerve-wracking for him.

“Enough that there’s barely going to be enough to survive on until we can get the water back into the system. Even then, I think we’re gonna need to resupply.”

“Can you give me any good news?”

“It doesn’t look like the water got into the electronics, but we can’t check it right now.”

“Michael can check the electronics. Focus on getting the pipes fixed. After running it through the purifier, we’ll have Gavin look at the water, make sure it’s good to drink. We don’t need another germ to take out half the crew.” As Geoff says this, Ryan felt a stab of gratitude towards Geoff; he’d completely forgotten that Michael was proficient with electronics and had been worrying over who’d be able to check them. Having Michael check the electronics was a load off his back. A small one, but a load nonetheless.

“Speaking of, how’s Caleb? Last I heard, Jack was still trying to keep him alive.” Ryan knew that he shouldn’t be keeping Geoff from his job, but it looked like Geoff could use the distraction. Although distracting him with something so serious probably isn’t the greatest idea, but it wasn't like Ryan had anything else to distract Geoff with.

“Doing better, but not out of the woods yet.”

“Still no idea why he reacted so badly?”

“None yet. Keep me posted on the water situation.”

“Will do,” Ryan clicked off the screen, then quickly returns to his office area and grabbed a protein bar. He wolfed it down in a few bites while walking back to the main filtration area, when an automated alert pops up on his viewscreen. Warning: engine main oxygen output valve clogged, recommend immediate action. He groaned, it was going to be a long day.

 

The rest of the day passed in a blur, one thing after another going wrong or breaking. He was extremely grateful that the ship had taken on both Jeremy and Matt when they joined the Rebellion; he couldn't imagine having to do all this entirely alone. And while Matt and Jeremy are young and inexperienced, they’re eager and obedient. Together, they manage to get the water pipes patched, and the oxygen intake value mostly unclogged, as well as fix most of the other problems that arise during the day. It’s hot and dirty work, and Ryan wanted nothing more than to take a shower and relax, but there’s not enough water for them to do anything more than wipe the worst of the grime off with a damp cloth. And relaxation was out of the question, there’s too many stress tests to run to make sure that they aren’t all going to die, too many things to double or triple check.

It was around 0300 when Ryan finally fell into his bunk, absolutely exhausted. Yet sleep eluded him. His mind just wouldn't stop working, wouldn’t stop going over the various problems he’d worked on, trying to find solutions.

Giving up on sleep, Ryan rolled back out of his bunk and walked down to the small onboard exercise area. He started up the one treadmill they had room for and began running, focusing more on emptying his mind than anything else. It didn’t work; at the end of the run, he’s covered in sweat and if anything, more annoyed.

Cursing silently under his breath, he made his way back to his bunk, determined that he’d get at least one hour of sleep. He eventually fell asleep, curled up in the corner of the bed, mind still roiling, dreams full of unpleasantness. He woke up approximately an hour later to the beeping of his viewscreen once more. This time, it was the ‘oh god the ship’s about to blow up, somebody do something’ alarm. He threw on his boots and grabbed his viewscreen and ran to the engineering department, scanning the readouts on his viewscreen at the same time. Apparently, they hadn’t fixed the oxygen valve as well they thought they had. Matt and Jeremy ran alongside him, both of them looking about as awake as he felt, and infinitely more scared.

“What’s going on?” Jeremy asked as they entered the engineering department.

“Oxygen valve. Get the auxiliary air support online now!” he barked at them, running to the main air support, desperately hoping that he’d be able to fix the problem before they ran out of air. As he began working on the the main valve, the communicator’s speaker came on, Geoff’s voice ringing worriedly through the small room.

“Ryan?”

“Air support’s shot. Get the personal emergency air supplies out.” Ryan said, trying once more to jumpstart the system.

“What about you?”

“Almost have it fixed. I’ll be fine.” Ryan knew that he should probably go and quick put on an air mask, but he was so close to fixing the valve. He was aware that Geoff was saying something to him, but he tuned it out in favor of focusing on the task at hand. Breathing became difficult, but he was almost done. With one last push, one last expenditure of energy, he managed to turn the valve back into place, then slumped to the ground, praying that it worked.

He woke up in a bed that wasn’t his, to the sight of Jack’s worried face hovering above him.

“So we didn’t all die then?” he managed to croak out, his throat feeling like sandpaper and tasting about as pleasant.

Jack smiled at this, relieved that Ryan seems to be ok. “No we didn’t all die. It was close though. You were without oxygen for about three minutes.”

“How long was I out?”

“Five hours. Give or take a few minutes.”

“Damn,” Ryan swore and moved to get up, only to be stopped by Jack’s hand on his shoulder.

“Don’t get up just yet, there’s still a few tests I need to run.” While Jack’s tone was soft, there was more than a hint of steel beneath the command; he would not hesitate to hold Ryan down if he felt it was necessary.

“I feel fine,” Ryan sat up and rolled his eyes at Jack’s concern. He felt fine and he needed to make sure that the ship was fine. It wasn’t that he didn’t trust Matt and Jeremy to take care of the ship, they were just inexperienced and could have missed something.

“I just need to make sure that you didn’t fuck your brain over.”

Ryan sighed and went through the bevy of tests that Jack wanted to run, mood growing steadily worse as time went on. Finally, Jack got up from where he was sitting next to Ryan’s bed. “All right, you’re good to go.”

“Thank you,” Ryan had to make sure not to snarl at Jack, it wasn’t his fault he was doing his job. “May I leave now?”

“Yes, but try to avoid any strenuous activity for at least a day or so. You’re still recovering.” From Jack’s expression, it was clear that he didn’t expect Ryan to listen to him, but was severely encouraging him to.

Just as Ryan was about to walk of of the med-bay, Geoff walked in (Ryan secretly suspected that Jack had sent a message to Geoff to keep him from leaving the med-bay, but he had no proof). Upon seeing that Ryan was not only awake, but walking around, a certain tension bled out of his shoulders. Yet, another tension remained. “You fucking idiot! What the fuck possessed you to not put on a goddamned mask?! Do you have any idea how recklessly stupid that was? Do you have any idea how lucky you are that Jeremy found you in time?” Geoff’s voice was calm and quiet, but there was a fierce undertone of anger that set Ryan’s teeth on edge.

“Yes sir,” Ryan replied, standing at attention. He didn’t need to be, but certain habits from basic training are hard to break, and Geoff had the angry superior officer vibe, even if his language was not the standard language used. “However, I deemed it necessary, and an acceptable risk to myself. I believed that it was more important that the ship continue flying than my ability to breathe.”

“While I appreciate your enthusiasm in completing your duties, I cannot condone your behavior. You disobeyed a direct order.” Geoff followed Ryan's example in language; he was just as conditioned as Ryan in some regards.

“I did?” Ryan interrupted; he could not remember Geoff giving him an order.

“I ordered you to put a fucking air mask on dickhead,” Geoff’s voice briefly lost its formal tone before regaining it. “Therefore, I’m confining you to your bunk for 24 hours.”

“Yes sir.” Ryan’s voice was blank as he answered, although internally he was seething. While he understood the reasoning behind the decision, it did not mean that he had to agree with the decision itself. And he did not agree. However, he mused, trying to find the best in a bad situation as he walked back to his bunk, this would at least give him time to read some of the engineering journals he'd fallen behind on. Still, the idea of being confined to a small space without much chance for movement irked him to say the least.

He made his way back to his bunk, mentally grumbling the entire way. His irritation only grew the longer he spent in his bunk. He couldn't focus on any of the journals, attention wandering all over the place. He napped sporadically, too upset to sleep well. Jack dropped by a couple times, bringing food and checking on Ryan before rushing back the med bay to keep an eye on Caleb.

 

After what felt far longer than it was, his 24 hour confinement was done. And not a moment too soon. In a foul mood, he made his way to Engineering to make sure that his ship wasn't going to blow up or anything like that. Matt and Jeremy, after apologizing profusely, then repeatedly inquiring about his health and doing their best to reassure him that they weren't all going to die, all but ran from him. This did nothing to improve his mood; although the fact that the ship was in little danger of blowing up did help it. Slightly.

Mentally grumbling even more, he made his way to exercise area once more, uncertain of what exactly he'll do once he gets there, but needing to do something. Michael was on a bench at the edge of the gym, flushed and covered in sweat.

“Ryan.”

“Michael.”

“You look like shit dude.” Michael had a slight smile as he said this, as though laughing at some private joke. Ryan was not in the mood for it. In retrospect, Ryan realised that Michael was just relieved to see him ok, but he wasn’t in the most perspective of moods.

“I feel fine,” Ryan snarled, bouncing ever so slightly on the balls of his feet. “In fact, I feel good enough to take you on. If you're not too scared to try.”

Michael raised an eyebrow at this, this was not a tone that Ryan used all that often. He must have been more than slightly pissed off. Better to risk Ryan beating his ass than beating anyone elses. “I'm up to it, if you can keep up.”

“Put your money where your fucking mouth is.” Ryan was already unlacing his boots and glancing at the small area reserved for sparring.

Silently, the two of them made their way into the area, stripping themselves of their boots and shirts. At some unspoken signal, the two of them began fighting. Not sparring, not practicing, but fighting. Ryan did not hold back, forcing Michael not to either, if only to keep himself from getting beaten into a bloody pulp. Eventually, the fight died down, leaving both of them bruised, bloody, and gasping for air.

“Better?” Michael asked wryly, rolling his shoulder before laying down on the floor.

“Better.” Ryan said, offering a hand to help Michael up, wincing only slightly as he helped Michael back to his feet. “Anyways, I'd better go check to see how the purification's coming. It should be done and we should be able to at least take a quick shower.”

“That'd be nice. I've gotta go check on the electronics again, the navigation's been tricky lately and Kdin won't stop bothering me about it.”

“I won't keep you then.”

Ryan felt better. Even if he had a lot of work, even if they could quite possibly die horribly in the near future, he felt ok, as though he could actually handle whatever the future had in store for them.

 

Notes:

In case the everyone's positions weren't clear:

Geoff's the captain
Ryan's the head of engineering
Matt and Jeremy are both junior engineers
Jack's the head of the medical department
Ray's the communication's officer
Caleb's a junior communication officer
Gavin's the science officer
Michael's the security head
Kdin's navigator

 

And as always, comments and kudos are very appreciated

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