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It was a rough night for all three of them.
Anarcho-communist spent the entire week at different protests and rallies, whether it was beating a cop’s face in with a bat or helping those who got too close to the crossfire. Que had seen enough bloodied faces, tear stains, and broken glass to last quem a lifetime.
Nazi had avoided the protests, instead busying himself with his secret hobbies. Tracking down his family tree wasn’t easy, especially since he technically had no heritage and was just a personified extremist ideology, but there had to be something to be prideful of, right? It couldn’t all just be Jewish. There has to be something Arian in him. So he kept looking, all week, only stopping to go to the bathroom and power nap.
Communist was just exhausted overall, a long week of dealing with the others and the aftermath of Centricide. Cleaning up the wreckage, making sure nobody was hurt or missing, helping Anarcho-capitalist repair buildings and property. It was a struggle to find any peace and quiet to do what he used to love. Reading theory and smoking fancy cigars and planning regimes was just so hard to come by now.
It was usually after a week like this, on a Saturday evening, when the three all had the same idea on their mind.
Comfort. Cuddling. Commie’s bed.
Ancom had been dating Commie for years now, despite their infighting, so it was only natural that que would head over without calling first. Que packed a bag of clothes for tomorrow, some other random items que might need, and rode quer bike uptown to Commie’s house.
It was more unusual for Nazi to immediately turn to the other statist for comfort, but not unheard of. He was always subtle, sending a text to Commie to ask if he was home alone and available. It was Commie’s job to interpret and respond. Once Nazi was given the okay, he packed an overnight bag as well and drove across town to Commie’s house.
Since Commie had only received word from one person that they were coming over, he only brewed a small pot of coffee. He cleaned up the house just as Nazi liked it. If it wasn’t clean then Nazi would complain for five minutes, and neither party wanted that right now. Commie made sure the house was warm, blankets fresh from the dryer.
A knock at the door. Right on time.
Commie went to the door and opened it up, only to slowly look down at the exhausted 5’5” mess on his porch. Ancom had a few dirt and blood stains on quer shirt and face. Que had the usual big grin on quer face however.
“Hey, Commie! Sorry to drop in unannounced, I was in a rush.” Ancom stepped inside the house, walking right past Commie and straight to the couch to set quer stuff down. Commie was dumbfounded, staring at the clock on the wall and wondering in horror how long it would be until all hell broke loose. He shut the front door and locked it.
“How long are you staying?” Commie asked, trying not to sound nervous.
Ancom tilted quer head like a confused puppy. “Overnight? The usual? Why’s it so hot in here?” Que reluctantly took off quer hoodie and laid it on the couch. Underneath was just quer black tank top and quer light grey binder.
“I… I’m expecting other company tonight.” Commie admitted, wiping his sweaty hands on his jacket. “You’re not the only one that wants to cuddle tonight.”
“Who, Ancap?” Ancom laughed, “I can handle him for a night… Why’s your house so clean? You never have your books put away.”
Another knock on the door. Unfortunately, right on time.
Commie snapped, “Get your hoodie on.” Ancom obeyed, not wasting time to follow quer commie’s orders. Que awkwardly stood in the living room, messing with their sleeves and trying to ignore the warm air.
Meanwhile, Commie unlocked the front door and stepped outside, shutting it again.
Nazi stood on the porch, still fully dressed with his gun on his hip and general’s hat on his head. Boots polished. Gun polished. Gun . Commie swallowed and shifted his weight from one foot to the other. He admitted quietly, “Comrade, forgive me, I have other company over. They came unexpectedly.”
“Kick them out.” Nazi said with a shrug. “Or don’t. I don’t care. It’s Ancap, right?”
Commie’s worried eyes said otherwise. Nazi shoved past him and went inside the house, glaring at the anarchist standing in the living room. He scoffed, “Of course. It’s you.”
Ancom grabbed quer bat and raised it over quer head. “Why the fuck is the fucking Nazi here, Commie?!” Que screeched.
Commie rushed to stand between the two just as Nazi was reaching for his gun. He ordered, “Both of you freeze! No killing each other under my roof! I did not plan for you both to be here at once, but you are… Now, I am fine with cuddling you both for the night, but it is between you two on how you want to settle this.” He crossed his arms. “In a civilized manner I might add.”
Ancom lowered quer bat and huffed, glaring at Nazi. Nazi mimicked his glare, hand still on his gun. Commie stepped aside and said, “I am going to make a pot of tea for Ancom. Nazi, I will bring you your usual coffee. Settle this. Civilized, please.” He reluctantly went to the kitchen and left the ticking time bombs alone in the living room.
A few seconds after Commie left Ancom plopped down on the couch. Nazi stayed standing to have the illusion of advantage. Ancom snapped, “If you don’t talk the rest of the night, I think I’ll do just fine. You?”
“If you can go three seconds without talking about anarchy, protests, minorities, gay rights, or anything else progressive then, sure, I can stay civilized.” Nazi taunted. Ancom resisted the urge to strangle him then and there.
A few more seconds of silence. Ancom tapped quer foot impatiently. Que said quietly, “Insults aside, I’m not leaving. So you’re gonna have to suck it up.”
“Same to you.” Nazi said coldly, “I at least called ahead, unlike you. I have just as much right if not more right than you to be here tonight.”
“Fine.”
“Fine.”
“Great!”
“Perfect.”
Commie came back in with a cup of tea and a cup of coffee. He handed each their drinks and asked, “Everything worked out?”
“Yes.” Nazi said, taking the mug and sitting in a chair. Ancom said nothing, refusing to halt his glaring at Nazi.
“I’ll…” Commie snapped his fingers. “I’ll turn the heat down a little. I’m a little hot myself.”
“You’re always hot,” Ancom teased.
Nazi rolled his eyes. This was going to be a very long night. He watched Commie turn the thermostat down a little and then sit in a chair separate from Ancom and Nazi. No favorites. Commie cleared his throat and suggested, “Should we put in a movie? Watch the news- No. um… A movie. Disney?”
“Disney’s fine-“
Ancom and Nazi stared at each other, a little shocked by their speaking in unison. Commie tried not to notice. He got up and went to the shelf, grabbing a few choices.
“I like the singing.” Ancom said, “And the fantasy stuff.”
Nazi replied, “Disney was founded on anti-semitism. Also the racial stereotypes are funny to watch.” Ancom narrowed quer eyes and opened his mouth to argue, but Commie interrupted.
“Pinocchio, Little Mermaid, Dumbo, Aladdin, Cinderella?” Commie listed off. Nazi wrinkled his nose in disgust at most of the options. Ancom leaned back on the couch and checked quer phone.
Commie sighed, “Pick one before I change my mind.”
“Dumbo, it has racial stereotypes and silly fantasy stuff.” Nazi decided for them.
So Commie put in Dumbo and got some popcorn from the kitchen, distributing it equally amongst the three of them. Ancom tried to ignore how lonely the couch felt with Commie sitting so far away. Nazi did the same, trying to tell himself that he could sit through a movie without Commie’s touch. Commie, of course, was oblivious to their feelings and focused on the movie.
About half way through Ancom finally broke. Que texted Commie.
Can you sit on the couch? Please?? I’m cold.
Commie felt his phone buzz in his pocket and immediately knew who was texting him. He waited a moment before taking it out and replying.
I’m not going to cuddle you right in front of Nazi. That’s rude. But if you’re fine with him joining then….
NO. WOULD RATHER DIE.
I thought you worked this out?
Yes and no??? uwu
“Are you two texting each other?” Nazi snapped, not looking away from the TV. Commie paused mid text and frowned, setting his phone aside. Ancom said nothing, unsure of how to explain.
Commie replied honestly, “Ancom wanted me to join quem on the couch. I told quem I didn’t want you to be left out, but I wasn’t sure exactly how to ask if you wanted to lay with us.”
“Save your breath. I’m fine.” Nazi crossed his arms and sunk in the chair. Commie waited a moment before getting up and moving to the couch, pulling Ancom into his arms and holding quem close. Ancom gladly curled up in the other’s arms, nuzzling him like a kitten. Nazi rolled his eyes for the hundredth time that night.
It only took a few minutes for Nazi to pine. He sighed a little as he shifted and tried to get comfortable in the chair. Commie eyed him but said nothing. Ancom was oblivious.
After another two minutes Nazi finally gave in and asked, “Can I sit on your other side, Commie?”
Ancom groaned a little but Commie simply smiled, gently moving quem aside so there was room for Nazi. Nazi got up from the chair and moved to the couch, sitting on the right of Commie while Ancom sat on the left. Commie kept one arm around Ancom’s waist and the other around Nazi’s shoulders.
Nazi mumbled, “You smell nice. Like pine and... alcohol.”
“You smell like aftershave.” Commie said, “And the faint lingering of blood.”
“Y’all smell like dog water, fucking men.” Ancom laughed, “Kill all men.”
“You’re also a-“
“Quiet.” Commie interrupted, “Ancom smells like citrus and spices.”
“It’s probably my bath and body works brand perfume.” Ancom said.
“And weed.” Nazi snapped. “Always weed.”
Ancom snickered a little, and shockingly didn’t insult him. Nazi didn’t reply either. He leaned his head on Commie’s shoulder, closing his eyes a little. Ancom was equally tired, already struggling to keep quer head up. Commie was still awake. He usually stayed up too late anyways, and it made him feel better to make sure his partners got some sleep before he did.
By the time the movie ended Ancom and Nazi had both dozed off, curled up against Commie and both lightly snoring. Commie smiled at the sound and closed his eyes, falling asleep as well.
The morning was odd for ⅔ of the group.
Commie was up first, 4:30 on the dot, and went straight to the kitchen to make coffee, tea, and breakfast. He hummed softly as he worked to make everybody’s food the way they all prefer it.
Nazi woke up second, but refused to open his eyes. He knew he should get up, but Commie’s couch was too comfortable. So, with his eyes still closed, he played a mental guessing game of what was going on. He heard noise in the kitchen, so Commie was probably cooking breakfast. There was sun hitting his eyes, so it had to be 5:30 or later. He was lying down on the couch, no longer sitting up, and there was a very small frame lying next to him. Soft fabric, curly hair, the faint smell of spices and weed. Nazi pulled the scent closer, burying his nose in whatever hair was next to him.
Everything felt so peaceful in that small moment, no war and no arguing, just the couch, spices, and once again the faint smell of weed.
And, like all good things, the moment ended abruptly.
“DONT FUCKING TOUCH ME!” Ancom screeched as que shoved Nazi as hard as que could and fell off the couch in a scramble. Nazi winced and sat up, fixing his shirt and hair. “WHY WERE YOU CUDDLING ME YOU RACIST FUCK?!”
“I wasn’t cuddling you!” Nazi argued. “I was half awake, I thought you were Ancap or Commie! Believe me, I would never cuddle some triggered snowflake faggot!”
“TAKE THAT BACK!” Ancom grabbed a box of tissues off the table and threw it at Nazi. Nazi had enough, lunging off the couch and tackling Ancom. They wrestled about, struggling to pin the other down and strangle them.
Commie came into the living room and put his fingers in his mouth, giving a loud whistle to call their attention. Ancom immediately ceased, scrambling away from Nazi and behind Commie’s legs. Que panted heavily. Nazi stayed where he was, also panting and glaring at the other.
“Nazi, we don’t use slurs under my roof. Ancom, no attacking Nazi. Nazi, no attacking Ancom. Da?” Commie said sternly.
Ancom nodded, still on the floor and messing with a loose string at the bottom of Commie’s jacket. Nazi waited a moment before nodding slowly.
“Sorry, Commie.” Ancom said quietly.
Now that the fighting was over, Commie said, “I have made us all breakfast. Coffee, tea, eggs how you both like them. Come sit.” He gently moved away from Ancom and went back into the kitchen.
Ancom got up first. Que glanced between Nazi and the kitchen. Then, unexpectedly, que walked over to Nazi and offered quer hand. Nazi looked up at quem. It felt like a trick, but Ancom looked more tired than confrontational. So, Nazi nodded a little and took quer hand, getting up off the ground and heading into the kitchen with quem.
They didn’t speak of it ever again though. The rest of the morning went by calmly, light conversation and mostly eating. An hour or so later, Nazi decided it was time to head back to the Nationalist home. Homofash was probably wondering about him, and Conservative Christian was probably struggling to hold his sanity with just Homofash to talk to at home.
Commie helped Nazi get his things together and led him to the door. Ancom stayed in the kitchen, finishing quer apple juice.
“I hope it was not too unbearable?” Commie asked.
“It was… alright.” Nazi admitted. He lowered his voice and continued. “When he isn’t talking… Que is alright. I didn’t mind the brief cuddling, I suppose.”
Commie smiled. He gently reached up and caressed Nazi’s cheek. “I am glad to hear that, comrade.” They leaned in and exchanged a quick kiss, just a goodbye before Nazi left.
“Drive safe.”
“I will.”
And with those final parting words, Nazi was gone.
Back into the kitchen, Commie sat down with Ancom and took quer hand. “Was it alright?” He asked, “I know he can be… a lot for you.” Ancom snuggled up close to Commie, closing quer eyes.
“I mean… It wasn’t awful.” Ancom admitted. “I was startled real bad though. He is a Nazi, and I refuse to align myself with that kinda person… but the cuddling was nice last night I guess… and I’m sure I can bare him for a few hours of cuddling.”
“Good.” Commie said, “Maybe I will invite him again in a few days. Give him time to be himself before forcing him here again.” He kissed Ancom’s knuckles “I love you, Anarkiddy.”
Ancom giggled, “Love you too.”