Chapter Text
*BEEP BEEP BEEP*
A hand shut off the alarm. ‘6am. Right on time’ he thought to himself. Levi quietly moved to the closet and got dressed. He moved towards the door and heard something behind him. ‘Is she?’ he started to think
Then he felt it on his leg. He immediately looked down “Oh it's just you” The grey cat looked up at him. He knew he wasn't a thug anymore but he still didn't like surprises.
He grabbed his apron when he entered the kitchen. Stains were no joke. Especially while he was wearing the long sleeved grey shirt his wife bought that he particularly enjoyed. He opened the fridge and he pulled out the goods. All the ingredients laid before him while he picked up the knife.
Levi was confident in his knife skills. His natural finesse with one never let him down. He was methodical as he packed his wife's lunch and prepared breakfast. The tea kettle started to whistle just as he heard a yawn followed by “good morning honey”
His wife was dressed and ready for work. She was a Nurse Practitioner so she already had her scrubs on. Levi put two plates down on the table.
“Breakfast is ready”
“Thank you” as his wife sat down in front of her meal.
She started to chat about her job over breakfast. Mostly about two nurses fighting over the newly divorced pediatrician from the office next door.
Levi gave his wife her lunch as she walked out the door. He kissed her goodbye and looked at the dishes. The cat meowed at him.
“Yeah you’ll get your food once I’m done with the dishes. Then it’s time to head to the grocery store. Where’d I put that list?”
With the dishes done and the cat fed, Levi grabbed the list and his reusable totes. He didn’t love the Dollywood shopping totes but he loved his wife. He also loved not having a drawer full of plastic bags.
Levi stepped into the store and grabbed his cart. He made his way down the canned good aisle when he heard a loud “LEVI EEE!” it was unmistakable.
Without turning around Levi responded “Hi Hange”
Zoe Hange was the next door neighbor. They worked from home so it wasn’t unusual to see them at any time during the day. Literally.
He put what he needed in his cart and saw what Hange had as well. Their cart was full of chicken nuggets, coffee and chocolate milk.
“Do you have a relative's kid staying with you or something?” Levi asked
Hange laughed “no silly I’m just stocking up”
“Hange you’re an adult you can’t survive off this kids crap”
Hange looked at their cart “yeah I’m just really bad at cooking I mean you remember the last time I tried”
Levi did remember. It took almost a month for the burnt ramen smell to finally subside.
“Follow me Hange”
“Where are we going?”
“I’m gonna teach you how to shop like an adult and how to cook for one too”
“Really?” Hange looked overly excited at the idea.
“Yes now hurry up or your frozen stuff is going to start defrosting”
Levi took Hange down all the isles doing his best to explain the different ways food could be prepared properly and replace their obsession with chicken nuggets.
“What spices do you have at home?” he asked
“Ummmm salt, pepper and some left over ramen flavor packets”
Levi put his hand over his eyes “Hange please throw those away.”
The odd duo made their way to the produce section. Levi held up some apples “How do you store your fruit?”
“Ummm on the counter?”
“Hange you need to be careful of things being on the counter. You don’t want ants do you?”
“No I just got rid of them finally”
Levi made a mental note to check all the food Hange offered him.
“Alright make sure you go to the frozen aisle last you don't want your frozen foods-what are you doing?”
He turned to see Hange with three boxes of their beloved chicken nuggets.
Levi sighed “the whole reason we’re doing this is so that you don’t live off that crap.”
“Awww come on please! can’t I just get one box? I mean we’re right here?”
Levi gave in. At least it was a regular box of chicken nuggets and not one of a box of ridiculously shaped ones meant for kids.
Finally they were done. He was surprised Hange remembered their reusable bags. Of course they were wrinkled and from some weird card game. He hadn't heard of Yu-gi-oh but he was thankful the cashier asked Hange something before they started explaining it to him.
Levi and Hange made their way back to the apartments. “I need to put my groceries away then I’ll be right over.”
Hange put their hand to their face “yes sir! Wait should I do the dishes first?”
Levi had already closed the door, he knew Hange’s apartment was far from clean.
He put all the groceries away, started a load of laundry and grabbed what he needed. As Levi made his way towards the door the cat meowed at him again. He reached down to his former enemy and rubbed his head “If I don't come back, Ein just assume I had an aneurysm after seeing Hange’s kitchen”
He locked the door behind him and braced himself for what might be behind the door.
“Hange please tell me you're the only living thing in there”
Hange opened their door “well there's no way to know for- I mean yes I am definitely the only thing here with a pulse.”
Levi could feel a migraine starting. “Sooner we get this started the sooner we finish. Here put this on” He handed them a spare apron.
“An apron? Wow you really do take this seriously”
Levi took a wet rag and cleaned the counter. “Being a househusbands no joke”
Levi wasted no time washing and preparing Hange’s kitchen while they threw out those disgusting ramen flavor packets. “We’ll start off easy creamed spinach and pasta”
“Right!”
Hange paid careful attention as Levi skillfully chopped the spinach and gave them instructions on how to season the ricotta cheese. He was so fast and efficient. He made cooking look so easy and effortless. Hange could smell everything and heard their stomach growl. Levi mixed everything together and topped it with shredded parmesan.
“Here”
Hange took one bite and jumped out of their seat “LEVI! THIS IS DELICIOUS!”
“Hey! Don’t spill that!”
“Oh- sorry. This is just really good. Where’d you learn to cook like this?”
He turned away from them “Don’t worry about it. Just make sure you clean up properly.”
Hange could tell he was blushing. They had seen Levi do the same thing whenever his wife tried to compliment him.
“My wifes gonna be home soon so I should go. You can keep the apron”
“No problem! I appreciate you!”
Levi left Hange’s apartment unscathed. He opened the door and looked at the clock “crap its already that late!”
He rushed to the kitchen and looked in the fridge. Luckily the meat was defrosted. He got to work quickly. He washed the rice before putting it in the rice maker. He was just making a simple curry dish but he knew he didn't want any mistakes. He seasoned the sauce and tasted a small portion. Perfect.
He quickly plated two servings just as he heard the door open.
“Hi honey. Wow dinner smells great!”
Levi's wife smiled as she sat down for her meal.
He could feel his cheeks getting warm as he asked about her day. Unfortunately for him the workplace gossip was just as trivial as it was this morning. All in a day's work of being a househusband.
One Week Later
Levi sat at the table drinking his tea when his wife walked in
“There's a package here for you.”
“Package? I didn't order anything.”
Levi opened the envelope and saw the note
Thanks for all your help! Hope you enjoy! -Hange
He dropped the contents on the table “what the hell?”
He heard a loud “awwwwwww how cute!” next thing he knew the thing was around the cats neck
“He looks so fancy in a little bowtie” his wife said with the cat now in her arms
“He's a cat he can’t look fancy”
“Don't listen to him Ein you look very handsome. Yes you do!”
‘Dammit Hange’