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Niki was used to always seeing Sunoo happy and smiling. It was rare to see him down and even rarer to see him cry. When Sunoo was little, he was even more upbeat. Everything seemed to make him happy and excited when he was little. Not that there was anything wrong with being down or sad; it was normal in life to have ups and downs. It just seemed that Sunoo most often had ups and very few downs.
So when they were out shopping one day and Sunoo completely broke down, it surprised Niki and honestly it kind of freaked him out a little bit. It was just the two of them doing some random clothes shopping and occasionally stopping for treats at the mall. They had been having a good time; they'd both found plenty of cute things to wear and had had so many treats they were stuffed. It was getting late and they had decided to hit one more shop before heading back to the dorms. Niki was flipping through some shirts when he heard the sound of thunder rumbling outside the building. It started quietly at first and then it started to crack so loudly it kind of made you jump. Niki wasn't surprised it was raining. It had been overcast and cloudy all day. Once he had heard a few peals of thunder he stopped being surprised by it. He grabbed a shirt he found on the rack that he thought would look good on Sunoo and turned around to find him in the shop. Not seeing him anywhere when he first looked up he began to walk around, doing a closer inspection. When he found him, he felt his heart breaking a little bit inside him.
Sunoo was in the corner behind one of the wracks, sitting down on the floor, hands clasped over his ears, eyes squeezed shut and tears streaming silently down his face. He ran over immediately, getting down on his knees so he could be at Sunoo's eye level.
"Hey! What's wrong?" Niki asked. He grabbed Sunoo's hands off his ears so he could hear his question but immediately Sunoo put his hands back on his ears.
"Loud...too loud! Hyung...scared!" Sunoo said in a whimpering, pitiful voice. He looked up at Niki with big, round tearful eyes.
Niki didn't even realize until Sunoo called him hyung that he was little now. Sunoo only called him hyung when he was in little space as Niki took care of him and acted as his hyung. Now he realized what was wrong. Sunoo was scared of the storm, scared enough that it had triggered him to go into little space. This was a surprise to Niki. He'd never seen Sunoo be little outside of the dorm and he'd also never seen him upset like this in little space. When Sunoo was little he was always happy, even happier and more excited than normal. Niki usually felt confident of his ability to take care of Sunoo but right now he felt a little bit out of his element. If they were at home, he knew what he would do to calm Sunoo. He'd hold him or rock him in his lap, maybe feed him a bottle or get his pacifier for him. But they weren't at home; they were in the middle of a store in public; there wasn't much he could do.
"Sunoo...it's okay. It's just a little thunder; it can't hurt you" Niki tried to say calmly but he didn't think Sunoo even heard him; he was so desperate to keep his ears covered.
Tears were still rolling down his face as he looked at Niki with the saddest look he'd ever seen. "Scared hyung...wanna go home" he said in a tiny, scared voice.
As if that wasn't pitiful enough Sunoo finally let go of his ears and reached his hands grabby toward Niki. It was so cute, so pitiful that Niki wanted to scoop him up into his lap and not let go of him for a very long time. He wished that he could do that right now; he wanted to make Sunoo feel better and be a good hyung. Since he couldn't hold Sunoo he did the next best thing and wrapped him up in a hug. Sunoo squeezed him so tightly he could barely breathe, showing how scared he was.
"Alright, baby" Niki said, giving him a reassuring pat on the back. "Let's go home."
Sunoo pulled back and looked at Niki with big trusting eyes; he still had tears rolling out of them. Niki took his hands in his own, squeezing tightly. "Sunoo, for us to get home you have to be a brave, big boy, can you do that? Can you hold hyung's hand and walk to the car with me?"
Another crack of thunder crashed and Sunoo jumped. He whimpered, another tear rolling out of his eye but he nodded at Niki. "Yeah...I'm a good boy." he said and took Niki's hand in his own.
Niki's heart felt like it was melting inside him, it was so cute. He gave Sunoo's hand a squeeze. "You're the best little boy" he said with a big smile. He gave Sunoo's hand one last squeeze and then stood up. He helped Sunoo to stand up; his legs were all wobbly like a baby deer taking its first steps. He wiped his face with his free hand, looking around the store, obviously a little self-conscious remembering he was in public. Niki could tell he wanted to cry more; his eyes were glassy and full of tears but he managed to hold them back except for a stray tear here and there that he quickly wiped away. He held onto Niki's hand for dear life, squeezing his hand hard, his palm all sweaty. Every time there was thunder Sunoo jumped and clung onto Niki a little more.
"You're doing so good baby" Niki assured him in a quiet voice as they walked through the mall. Niki knew it was really hard for him not to cry, really hard for him to cooperate and walk when he wanted to just hide.
"Thank you, hyung" Sunoo said in a scared voice, looking around at all the people and noises in the crowded mall. He bit his lip nervously. Niki could see his thumb kept drifting up toward his mouth, touching his lips before he would pull back and remember he couldn't suck his thumb right now.
When they got to the front door, Niki set the bags down and let go of Sunoo's hand just long enough to pull the hood of his sweatshirt up over his head so he wouldn't get as wet in the rain. "Alright, Sunoo. Take my hand again and we'll run as fast as we can to the car, okay?" Niki encouraged Sunoo. Sunoo was staring out the window at the heavy rain, his eyes wide with fear. A flash of lightning lit up the sky followed by a huge crack of thunder. Sunoo squeezed Niki's hand and then buried his face in his chest, oblivious of the crowds of people for a few moments.
"Scary! Too loud!" Sunoo said in a frantic voice. He clung onto Niki and the way he was shaking against him, he knew he was sobbing again. Niki felt so powerless; he wanted to take away all of Sunoo's fear and sadness but he couldn't.
All he could do was hug him and rub his back and whisper in his ear, "It's going to be alright." Niki didn't know what had brought this on. Sunoo had never shown any particular fear of storms before: did he just feel more comfortable being little around Niki now? Was something else bothering him and this was just the last straw? Niki didn't know and he wasn't going to get any answers anytime soon. All that mattered now was getting home.
"I know it's loud and scary" Niki assured him, "but I promise we'll be okay. Trust me?"
Sunoo pulled his face out from Niki's chest, his eyes and cheeks red, tears smeared across his skin. "I trust you, hyung" he said quietly, looking completely pitiful.
He took Niki's hand again and Niki took the opportunity to get out of there quickly. He opened the door and pulled Sunoo with him, running through the rain to the car. They were wet by they got to the car and Niki ushered Sunoo in first. Thunder crashed loudly as Niki sat down next to him and Sunoo immediately clung to his arm, his hands shaking. Luckily it wasn't a long drive home. Somehow Sunoo managed to hold it together until they got home, his eyes swimming with unshed tears, his fingers like a vice on Niki's arm.
They were the first ones back home and Niki was not surprised when they walked into the door and Sunoo immediately lost it. The moment the door shut behind them Sunoo was wrapping his arms around Niki's neck, burying his face in his neck and sobbing like his heart was breaking.
"Hold me, hyung" Sunoo said in a whimpering voice, his breath hotly blowing against Niki's neck. He could already feel the wetness of tears there. Sunoo clung to him as if Niki was going to leave him, as if he was desperate to be with him. It confirmed for him even more that Sunoo was more than just scared of the storm. Sometimes you just needed to cry and this definitely seemed like one of those times for Sunoo.
Niki gently guided Sunoo toward the couch so he could properly hold him like he'd wanted to since he'd seen Sunoo break down in the store. Niki sat down on the couch and Sunoo was instantly in his lap practically throwing himself down onto him. He wrapped his arms around Niki's neck, buried his face and sobbed so hard he shook both of them. It broke Niki's heart; he wanted to do something to make Sunoo feel better, to make him happy again. But he didn't know what to do. Sunoo had asked him to hold him and if that's what he wanted he'd hold on to him for as long as he needed.
Niki put his arm under Sunoo's legs and pulled them up so he was more curled up into his lap before wrapping his arms around him and holding him close. He could feel Sunoo's tears soaking into his shirt, could feel him clinging to him a little tighter every time it thundered loudly. He knew Sunoo liked for him to sing so he started to sing lullabies gently to him, rocking him back and forth. He was still crying but he wasn't wailing or sobbing; he calmed down enough to hear Niki sing. Niki looked down at Sunoo, who was now nestling his face against Niki's chest and putting his thumb into his mouth and sucking on it gently. Niki moved back and forth, rocking Sunoo gently as he sang. Sunoo started to look calmer; his face was still wet with tears but Niki didn't see any new ones falling. The storm seemed to be losing steam; the thunder getting less frequent and not as loud.
They were still like that when the others began to trickle back into the dorm. As they began to sit down in the living room with Niki and Sunoo, they were all drawn to the cute but pitiful sight of an obviously little Sunoo in Niki's lap. They were surprised by Sunoo's upset also, not used to seeing him red faced and tear streaked.
"Oh….Sunoo….what's wrong?" Jungwon said as he sat down across from them, his voice sympathetic and sad.
Even though none of them were really Sunoo's caregivers besides Niki he could see them all soften as they saw how upset he was and heard the tone of their voices change to talk to little Sunoo.
Sunoo looked at Jungwon but his only response was to pout his lip out and whimper, obviously not wanting to talk about what was bothering him. He looked so adorable even though none of them wanted to see him sad.
Niki rubbed Sunoo's back comfortingly. "Sunoo is a little scared of the storm" he explained for his little. "We're just having some extra cuddles to help him feel better."
Everyone cooed and awwwed at Sunoo, feeling bad for him that he was so scared and upset. "It's clearing up outside" Jake told him encouragingly. "In a few minutes that mean old storm should be passed."
Sunoo seemed to perk up a bit at that but he still didn't speak, his eyes wide, his thumb still moving soothingly in his mouth.
"Everything's going to be okay. You're safe inside and you have all of us here with you" Jay said in an encouraging tone besides him and Niki. He reached up and wiped the tears off Sunoo's cheeks with his fingers, giving him a warm smile.
Sunoo surprised everyone by suddenly climbing from Niki's lap into Jay's, wrapping his arms around Jay's neck and clinging to him and saying, "My hyungie Jay!"
Jay looked surprised most of all, frozen as the little cuddled up to him. Sunoo always clung to Niki when he was little and Jay looked at Niki questioningly as if he didn't know what to do.
"It looks like Sunoo needs extra cuddles" Niki said with a smile encouraging Jay to just cuddle him, "Jay cuddles."
Jay smiled and wrapped his arms around Sunoo who had curled up in his lap and had his face buried in his chest. He stayed contently there for several minutes before Sunoo sat up, held up his arms and whined, "Jungwonnie!"
Jungwon looked surprised. "I think you're up," Niki told him with a smile. It was amusing to see his hyungs out of their element and taking care of Sunoo.
"Awww...you want me?" Jungwon asked with a big smile, seeming surprised but pleased.
Sunoo nodded, holding out grabby hands before he climbed into Jungwon's lap where he cuddled up and sucked his thumb as Jungwon played with his hair.
Over the next hour or so Sunoo gradually made his way around the room, spending time in each of the others' laps before making his way back to Niki's lap. He'd long since stopped crying and the storm had passed. But he was still quiet and looked tired. Niki was amused and pleased to share his time with his little with the others and glad Sunoo could get plenty of love and affection from all of them but he had to admit that he was glad to get him back as well.
"Let's go get some pajamas" Niki urged him, their clothes still slightly damp from the rain.
"Okay hyung" Sunoo said, his voice sleepy and rough sounding. He reluctantly got off Niki and instantly took his hand so Niki could lead him to the bedroom.
Niki looked through Sunoo's pajamas, looking for something especially cute and comfy. He found Sunoo's favorite warm fluffy onesie and figured it was perfect for the sad, rainy day. It was purple and mint green with a cute unicorn hoodie and it even had a tail that Sunoo loved to make move by dramatically shaking his butt. Niki had to admit he never would not laugh at that.
"You want your unicorn pajamas?" Niki asked Sunoo who was sitting on his bed. That actually managed to get a small smile from Sunoo, the first since the incident in the store. He nodded enthusiastically before flopping back on the bed, stretching out, obviously intent to letting Niki dress him up like a doll.
Niki laughed to himself as he walked over to the bed with the pajamas. He pulled off Sunoo's jeans, which was really quite a feat because Sunoo didn't help at all, before working Sunoo's legs into the feet holes in the onesie. He pulled Sunoo into a sitting position so he could pull the hoodie over Sunoo's head. He helped Sunoo into the rest of the onesie and zipped it up. Just for fun, Niki pulled the hood onto his head, making him look like a cute unicorn. Maybe a little bit of a sad unicorn but still very cute.
"Would you like your pacifier?" Niki asked as he changed quickly into his own pajamas, glad to be out of the wet clothes. Sunoo usually just sucked on his thumb but if he was feeling super small he sometimes liked the pacifier. He'd been so upset and clingy today Niki thought he might like the extra comfort.
Sunoo nodded, watching Niki with big eyes as he went to the drawer where Sunoo kept it. Niki liked the glittery pacifier; it made Sunoo look super cute and it was so extra it was perfect for his personality. Sunoo opened his mouth widely like a hungry baby and Niki popped it into his mouth.
"Cuddles!" Sunoo said around his pacifier, holding out his arms.
"Aww….. baby wants more cuddles?" Niki asked, even though he wasn't surprised. He was beginning to assume, especially the way Sunoo had sought cuddles from everyone, that his need for extra affection was most likely what had triggered his littleness and outburst today.
Niki was about to climb onto the bed next to Sunoo to cuddle him when he could hear the sound of music coming from the living room. Sunoo's head popped up from the bed, his eyes comically wide as the music filtered through the wall. He started to grin as he said, "Baby shark?" He looked delighted at the prospect. Niki knew Sunoo loved to listen to baby shark when he was little. In true little kid fashion it never seemed to grow old.
"It kind of sounds like it" Niki said, just glad to see Sunoo smiling. "I think maybe the hyungs put it on for you. You want to go see?"
Sunoo jumped up. "Yes!" He said excitedly, hoping up and down. He took Niki's hand as they walked back into the living room. Sure enough, baby shark was playing on the tv and as soon as the others noticed Sunoo was back in the room they all started singing to the song and doing the most ridiculous dance.
If Niki wasn't so intent on Sunoo right now, he'd definitely be filming it.
Sunoo's whole face lit up, his eyes positively sparking before he started to laugh. A real, genuine Sunoo laugh. The sound of that was music to all their ears after seeing him so sad. The others danced their way over to Sunoo and began to wiggle and dance silly around him. His laughter only increased to the point he had to take his pacifier out, his head thrown back in laughter.
"Hyung...they're so silly!" Sunoo told Niki in glee as the other danced around him. Niki couldn't stop smiling, watching Sunoo's reaction much more than the others silly dancing. He was grateful to the others, for all the extra cuddles they'd given him and thinking up something so silly and goofy if was sure to make their sad little laugh. Niki was thinking all of this over when Sunoo grabbed his hand and pulled him close, so they were half dancing, half hopping up and down together as the others acted out the motions in baby shark.
Niki knew sometimes everyone had bad moments, even Sunoo. But he was still over the moon to see his little laughing and happy instead of sad and crying.