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Today was supposed to be the best day of your life. So why did you have this pit in your stomach? You were surrounded by many people. Someone who just finished doing your hair and makeup, in the back your bridesmaids, laughing and joking with Chris’s mom and sisters, who were also in the room, at something you didn’t hear as you had zoned out. Currently starting at the white dress hanging in front of you, it was all too much.
“I can’t do this,” you mumble to yourself. You realise you must have said it loud enough for everyone to hear as the room fell silent. So silent you could hear a pin drop. Before you let anyone else say anything, you shout for everyone to leave. Trying to usher everyone out the door, you kept saying you wanted to be alone. Obviously, they were confused, wishing to know why and what you meant.
“Please, out. EVERYONE OUT!” Realising you were serious, they left. As the last of your bridesmaids left the room, you slammed the door shut. Thankful there was a lock, you twisting it before falling to the floor, trying to steady your breathing. All while looking at the beautiful white dress you were supposed to be getting into.
You didn’t know where this rush of emotions came from; you loved Chris, you know you for sure want to marry him and spend the rest of your life with him, so why were you suddenly getting cold feet?
You weren’t sure how long you sat there think things over before you heard a soft knock on the door. You froze. Knowing at least someone would have said something to someone else about your little outburst, you weren’t sure who could be on the other side of the door.
“Hey, it’s me.” It’s was Chris. Oh god. You felt that lump in your throat grow. You didn’t know what he was thinking, wanting to say so much to him, you go to speak, opening your mouth, but no words go out. For a moment, you hear some rustling from the other side of the door you were currently sat leaning against. You guess he’s also sat on the floor when he speaks one more.
“I’m alone baby, it’s only me.” His voice is quiet and calm, but you can hear the nervousness in it. “Ma said you shouted at everyone to leave, said you wanted to be alone, but I needed to know if you’re okay, see where your head is at. I-I…” he paused for a moment; you guess he doesn’t know what you say, hell you don’t even know what to say.
“I-I’m sorry I freaked out.”
“Do you wanna call the whole thing off-”
“No…” you try to cut him off, but he continues, talking even faster.
“- it’s okay if you do, I get it. I’ll go out there and tell everyone to go home, and we can go somewhere and talk, o-or you can go on your own if you don’t want me around.”
“NO!” you shout, tears threatening to fall at the thought of him even think you don’t want him around you. “No, I will always want your around. I love you so fucking much, and I want to marry you; I really really do. I just…” you pause, contemplating how to finish that sentence.
“What’s going on in that beautiful head of yours, sweetheart?”
“I-I… for a moment back there, it just all got too much, became too real. Everything was just so loud, and I couldn’t focus, and I freaked out.” A brief thought made you chuckle, “trust me to go full bridezilla right at the last minute, huh.” Chris laughed with you. “All that being said, I guess all the nerves I hadn’t been feeling throughout the planning of the wedding just crept up on me, and I’m so sorry I ruined us getting married.”
“You didn’t ruin a single thing.”
“Y-you mean you still want to marry me?”
“Of course, I’d marry you right this second, even with this door between us if I could. You had a little freakout. It happens. It doesn’t change the way I feel about you or the fact I wanna spend the rest of my life with you, even if that means we get married at a later date. You’re it for me, sweetheart. Forever and always, as long as you want me.”
The dam breaks, and you let the tears fall, all the emotions hitting you again, but this time you’re happy about it. The love you have for him and he for you isn’t something you need to be afraid of. As long as you had each other, you knew you would make it. At that moment, every fear or doubt you had mulling away in your head disappeared. It’s was like you could finally breathe again.
“I love you so fucking much.” you manage to get out in between sobs.
“I love you too, and hey, if that gets you emotional, just and wait until you hear my vows.”
“I can’t wait.”
“So you sure you want to do this now, I meant it abo-”
“Yes, I’m more than sure.”
“Okay then,” you hear similar rustling for the other side of the door like before, the Chris tries to open the door.
“I’m gonna need you to open the door.”
“Chris, I can’t; it’s bad luck.”
“I will promise I will keep my eyes closed. I just really need to kiss you right now.” You weren’t going to lie. You could really kiss him right now too. So you got your feet and unlocked the door. Double-checking, he has his eyes closes before actually opening it. As you do, he’s standing there like a dork with his tux on. Looking handsome as ever, and his eyes are closed.
He’s already raising his hands to you. Touching you, his hand making their way up to your head as he cups your cheeks, leaning in to kiss you
“You know, your lips feel different with my eyes closed.” He laughs.
“That’s because you kissed my nose, you fool.”
“My bad, just have to try again.” this time, as he leans in, you move closer to him, kissing him back. He kisses you softly, pouring so much emotion into the kiss you can feel it radiating off his whole body.
“The next time we do that will be as husband and wife.”
“Hmmm, I can’t wait.”
You reluctantly pull away from each other. Chris carefully backs out of the room, eyes still remaining closed.
“I’ll see you out there.”
“You bet I’ll be the one in white.”
Slowly everyone makes tire way back into the room. You apologise for what happened earlier before proceeding to get your dress on. You’re getting last minute touches on your makeup when there is a knock at the door. It’s your brother, ready to walk you down the aisle.
“You ready to go?”
Taking one last look at your self on the floor-length mirror, you nod. “More than ever.”
As soon as Chris sees you, his whole face lights up; walking down the aisle, by far, felt like the longest walk you’ve ever had to do. As you finally stand next to him, he quietly whispers to you, ‘you look beautiful.’ Heat rises in your face as you blush at his words. Chris was right about his vows; he always did have a way with words. Finally, he kissed you, and you were now husband and wife.
All your thoughts from earlier were non-existent, and you really couldn’t wait to spend the rest of your life with the one you love.