Work Text:
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
It’s a cold and broken Hallelujah, that falls from his lips. It’s holy, holy, holy and solemn hymns. Begging for forgiveness, harsh exhalations and soft intakes, eyes so blue they put the oceans to shame. Fingers reaching, digging into the skin on his back, searching for something no longer there.
And even though it all went wrong,
I’ll stand before the Lord of Song,
With nothing on my tongue but Hallelujah
A memory of a different time, unshed tears and a heart that aches, cries out for another and goes unheard. Phantom pains for the wings he lost, imagined feathers flying around him to litter the ground beneath. Back arching, muscles moving and spasming, trying their best to work appendages no longer there.
Arms reaching forward, pulling him into a tight embrace, tucking his face into a firm chest. A sudden opening of the floodgates, tears falling freely to be soaked up by flannel and words of apology tumbling forth from his lips. Stubbled chin resting atop his head, low voice gently shushing as someone else reaches out and rubs at his back. His own hands come up and curl into the shirt of the one holding him, clinging to them as openly sobs.
A litany of apologies falls from him, among them a whispered request to just cut out all the ropes and let him fall, as he brings them nothing but sorrow. A voice behind him immediately cuts in, a gentle but firm, your faith was strong but you needed proof and that was okay. No one was going to hold that against him, it’s not a crime that you’re here tonight, staring at the sink of blood and crushed veneer. A quiet reminder that they’ll be with him in the morning, that he hasn’t been forsaken.
Warmth spreads through him as a body moves in behind him, caging him in and trapping him between them. There is no fear that grips him though, no fight or flight response, only a slowing of the tears. An evening out of his breath as he slumps between them, melts into their arms and allows himself to be held and comforted. Small, reverent kisses littered across the top of his shoulders, arms loose around his middle and someone’s fingers raking through his hair, soft whispers of reassurance.
They drift off like that after a while, all curled up together with him safe and secure in between. A tiny smile graces his features as he sleeps, secure in the knowledge that he is loved, and it doesn’t matter if he has his wings or not.