Chapter Text
Deep inside where nothing's fine, I've lost my mind.
I wait quietly for the smallest sound that would indicate someone coming towards me. Drowned in the sea of sorrow, I let reality overrun me as the night stretches with every passing moment.
Every person has their secret sorrows which the world does not know about. Because they will never understand the Hell I feel inside my head. Lost myself trying to please everyone, and now I'm losing everyone else trying to find myself.
I miss me. The old me, the happy me, the bright me, the smiling me, the laughing me...
the lost me..
I lost everything.
Cried, but did not heal.
Smiled, but did not feel.
Forgave, but did not forget.
Now, left with nothing but regret.
It's like being colorblind and constantly being told how beautiful the colors are.
"Jimin."
I live in a house of cards.
Because that home was a prison.
Because I believed my own silken lies.
Because I could not be honest with myself.
Because I did not, and still don't, wish to have dark days, sleepless nights, grumpy mornings, and this endless dark tunnel with no sign that it ever ends.
"Jimin"
My thoughts stop running marathons, my heart stands still, the air hangs thickly around us, making it difficult to inhale.
"It has been a long day without you, my friend. I'll tell you all about it when we meet again."
His words over the phone, had haunted me, chased me, and killed me.
But maybe everything will be OK now.
But some wounds never heal truly and bleed again at the slightest word.
I still am trapped in a room in Hell with only my name on the door.
And nothing can change that.
"Yoongi." I acknowledge his presence but it feels like it's someone else.
Time doesn't heal wounds. It just makes you used to their pain.
"It has been so long.." He starts awkwardly.
I hum in response, not knowing what to say either.
Yoongi looks around.
"Let's go to a cafe. It's cold here."
"Of course."
He takes out his phone and looks up the directions, while I'm left sitting limply on the park bench.
"Come on. It's this direction." He says, leading the way.
No.
I push myself to a stand, inhaling stressful breaths.
Because I believe time wounds all heals.