Work Text:
Oh, my love, my darling
I've hungered for your touch
A long, lonely time
Time goes by so slowly
And time can do so much
Are you still mine?
I need your love
I need your love
God speed your love to me
~Unchained Melody
Nozaki did not have sick days often, but when they happened, they happened at the worst of times. Today he was absent for a very important class: their English teacher was assigning the teams for a small group project, and Nozaki had missed his chance at getting paired up with Sakura.
Ever since the day they’d started holding hands every so often on their way to or from school (for manga reference purposes, initially), Nozaki just couldn’t get rid of the bout of possessiveness that seemed to well up inside him every time his shorter friend was off doing things with anybody that wasn’t him or one of their close friends. His plan to keep any potential admirers at bay with his quiet but imposing presence had been working generally well so far, as nobody had confessed to her or tried to ask her out when he was around. But the identity of her mystery crush was still unknown to him, and it had really started to bother him.
Nozaki’s day so far had been generally awful. The only highlight was when Sakura dropped by in the morning on her way to school, saw what a terrible condition he was in, and immediately started fussing about and warmed him up some soup to eat in bed. He’d felt quite nauseous and queasy, but hadn’t thrown up yet, so in the end he ate as much as he could stomach without overdoing it. She’d left for school, promising to come back later after stopping by the pharmacy to grab him some medicine for his fever and nausea. He was looking forward to her return, and after eating as much of the soup as he dared, he tucked himself back into bed and quickly fell into a fitful and feverish sleep full of strange dreams.
He was finally awoken by a steady knocking at his front door. Pulling a blanket over his shoulders and hugging it tightly around himself, he clumsily dragged himself out of bed and shuffled down the hall to open the door.
He was met with the sight of a tall teenager wearing glasses, who was vaguely familiar but that Nozaki, in his still feverish state, couldn’t quite recognize at the moment. The two stared at each other for a few seconds, confused.
“Nozaki-kun! Are you feeling any better?” asked a familiar voice, and he lowered his gaze to spot Sakura, who had been standing in front of the glasses-wearing teen, peering up at him in concern.
He nodded dumbly, though he wasn’t exactly sure if this was the case. His head felt heavy and his stomach was still in knots, and he did feel very thirsty all of a sudden. He let Sakura gently push him back inside and herd him to the kitchen where she made him take the medicine she had brought and didn’t let him budge until he had drunk two full glasses of water and nibbled on a couple of crackers.
“You remember Moritaka-kun, right, Nozaki-kun?” she’d asked him as he kept a wary eye on the boy setting up his notebooks and pencils on the table. She sighed when he said nothing and continued: “He’s from our English class, and he’s my partner for the project. Sensei said that, since it seemed like you’ll be sick for the next couple of days and that it isn’t that big of a project, you could just try and do as much as you could on your own while you recover.”
“Thank you for asking for me and letting me know,” he said, nodding. The pills she had given him were starting to take effect, and his head was definitely beginning to clear. But he still didn’t have an explanation as to what Moritaka was doing in his apartment.
“Why is he here though,” he whispered, cupping his hand around him mouth to lean down towards her ear. I don’t want him around, he left unsaid. Sakura gave him a pointed look.
“Well, we wanted to get started on our project right away, but Nozaki-kun is sick and last time you didn’t handle it so well-” he let out an indignant gasp “-which is why I wanted to come over and see how you were doing. Oh and I wanted to bring you your medicine too.”
“Thank you for that,” he said, a sudden warmth flooding his belly when she smiled at him.
“It’s no problem, really! And this way I get to keep an eye on you and make sure you get better while still working on my English project.”
“Are you two… done in there?” Moritaka called out from the table, glancing up at the two in the kitchen. The interruption annoyed Nozaki, and he struggled to school his features into a neutral expression. He took another look at his classmate, thinking how easily he would fit the “scheming megane” type if he were a manga character. In real life, however, Nozaki knew that even though the guy was quite intelligent, he was also very athletic (he couldn’t quite recall which sports he played though), and with his taller-than-average height, he was apparently quite popular with the girls in their class.
“Ah, yes, sorry Moritaka-kun!” Sakura said pleasantly, giving Nozaki a push to get his still-blanketed body back in motion.
He stumbled back into his room as he heard Sakura getting settled at the table next to Moritaka. They started chatting about their project as Nozaki got back into bed, Sakura’s pleased tone making jealousy stir within the pit of his stomach.
For the next hour or so, he tossed and turned grumpily, without actually drifting into sleep, the happy sounds of the two working away at the table a constant distraction. Sakura sounded so adorable whenever she tried to speak in English, and Nozaki sighed once again at having missed the opportunity to be her partner for the project.
He could imagine her face right now: she would silently mouth the words as she read them before trying to repeat them out loud, turning as red as her hairbows every time she made a mistake. She would squeak out a small sorry and look away, embarrassed. Nozaki wanted to be the one to see that; he wanted to be the one to hold her hand and tell her she did fine, and that they’d both try it again.
But instead, that Moritaka fellow was out there right now with her, and Nozaki was stuck in his room. Why did he have to be sick? Sakura really seemed to be enjoying herself and he really just wanted to be with her right now.
A sudden realization hit him, and he bolted upright in his bed, fully awake. What if… what if Moritaka was the guy Sakura had a crush on? And he had let hiM INTO HIS APARTMENT OH NO—
He had to calm down and think about this rationally… Ok, so Moritaka was definitely the desirable type in general, but that didn’t mean he was Sakura’s type, did it? He had no idea what her opinion on glasses was, but he did believe she liked guys who were tall… like Moritaka was… and guys who had nice muscles… like Moritaka was bound to have, as an athlete… and being intelligent never hurt a guy’s chances.
Overall he had to admit that the guy was quite handsome, and as an artist Sakura would definitely have an appreciation for his esthetic beauty, and, thinking back, he definitely seemed like a guy who dressed himself quite nicely. All of that, coupled with the fact that she seemed to be having much too pleasant a conversation with him when they were supposed to be working on a school project, left no doubt in Nozaki’s mind: Moritaka was Sakura’s mystery crush.
He scrambled to untangle himself from his sheets and, in his haste, fell out of bed with a loud thunk. He distantly wondered if Sakura would come over to see if he was all right, but the noise of his fall either hadn’t been heard or hadn’t seemed important to her as their conversation continued on without interruption.
Nozaki felt himself sadden as he pulled himself upright and started gathering some cleaner clothes to change into. Was this it? Was this the day his beloved friend would be taken from him by some cool, classy megane? Would the guy write her a love letter in English, gazing longingly as the orange-haired girl read it and deciphered its meaning, a blush rising to her cheeks? Would they forget about Nozaki entirely and just proceed to kiss, right there in his dining room?!
He paused for a moment to collect his scrambled thoughts. No, life was not like a shoujo manga, and he was still recovering from a fever, so his mind and over-active imagination were definitely not to be trusted at the moment. He decided to try and play it cool, and to go out and gather more information before jumping to any more hasty conclusions. Moritaka probably had no idea about Sakura’s feelings, but it wouldn’t take him very long to fall for the adorable girl, with her flustered smiles and kind words and equally adorable hairbows.
He decided an interruption was definitely needed. Once he was fully dressed in something a bit nicer than the pajamas he’s been wearing for a day and a half, he left him room and headed for the kitchen. He was pleased to note that Sakura noticed him almost immediately and turned from Moritaka to him.
“Ah, Nozaki-kun! Are you feeling better now?” she asked, smiling.
“Yes, thanks again for the medicine, Sakura. I’m feeling a bit hungry actually, what would you like to eat?” The last part was no lie – now that his nausea had started to recede, the grumbling of his stomach was no longer something he could ignore.
“Anything Nozaki-kun makes is fine!” she beamed at him, echoing her words from that fateful day when he’d first asked her to hold hands for his research. He turned away and started rifling through his cupboards to hide the sudden burning in his cheeks.
“He’s a really good cook!” Sakura continued, this time addressing Moritaka. Nozaki hummed with satisfaction at her words, deciding to go all out and make an elaborate meal to impress the both of them. The more things to make, the longer it would take to prepare, and the more time he would have to spend in the kitchen, meaning those two wouldn’t be left at the table all alone.
They kept working in relative silence as Nozaki moved about his kitchen in his cleanest apron, the peaceful familiarity of cooking a meal immediately relaxing him. He drank some more water and took another dose of medicine to help keep any muffled-headedness at bay, mostly because he was finally starting to feel passably normal again and didn’t anything to ruin his plan.
Every so often he would glance back over at the table, mostly to keep an eye on Sakura. On one occasion he glanced over only to catch Moritaka’s gaze, and he narrowed his eyes at him challengingly, with seemed to confuse the boy, who simply adjusted his glasses and looked back down at his papers in silence. Nozaki considered it to be a small victory, but for what exactly, he wasn’t quite sure.
Once the food was done, he started bringing the dishes over to the table with Moritaka’s help as Sakura cleared their books and took out the chopsticks. They thanked him for the meal and dug in, the praise gushing from Sakura’s lips between bites of food making Nozaki feel giddy with happiness. Even Moritaka let out a surprised compliment after his first couple of morsels.
When they were done eating, Nozaki started to feel sleepy and a tad bit nauseous, and wondered if ingesting so much after hardly eating anything all day had really been a good idea. Moritaka offered to do the dishes (of course he was a gentleman) while Sakura helped Nozaki walk over to the bathroom, though he tried not to lean on his shorter friend too much for fear of crushing her. He locked himself inside to relieve his bladder and quickly splash some water over his face, trying to control the churning in his stomach and the rapid beating of his heart.
In the end he managed not to throw up, and when he finally left the bathroom Sakura was still there waiting for him, a patient smile on her lips. She slung his arm back over her shoulder as they headed back, and though it once again wasn’t doing much to help keep him upright, the warmth of the contact comforted him.
“I asked Moritaka to set up a futon next to the table so we can keep an eye on you while you rest,” she said, glancing up to meet his eye. “Please let us know if you start to feel worse, and one of us will help walk you back to the bathroom.”
Embarrassing as it was to have a potential rival see him at his lowest, he loved having Sakura taking care of him and even let her tuck him into the futon as she layered blanket upon blanket over him.
“Would Nozaki-kun like some tea?” she asked him, and he nodded with a sleepy smile, closing his eyes.
He wasn’t aware of much after that, drifting in and out of consciousness. He remembers being woken up for some tea, which he had drank after sitting up, still cocooned in his nest of blankets, before lying back down and drifting off almost immediately. He vaguely recalls a cloth wiping his brown and a hand brushing through his hair at some point, but it was probably just a dream.
After what could have been hours, or even just minutes, he awoke to a vicious churning in his stomach and he immediately sat up, which only managed to make the dizzying in his head even worse.
“Moritaka-kun, grab him!” Sakura cried, though her voice felt distant and muffled. Strong arms caught him just as he was about to tip over, and he was lifted and propped up against another warm body, his arm pulled over a strong set of shoulders as he was walked towards what he very much hoped was the bathroom.
The minute the porcelain bowl of the toilet was within view, he launched forwards and hunched himself over it – not a minute too soon. As he emptied the contents of his stomach, he missed Sakura’s embarrassed giggled as she placed a glass of water and some pills on the counter, sharing a look with Moritaka who gave her an amused eye roll.
Small hands rubbed soothing circles in Nozaki’s back as he gave a few final heaves, before Sakura left to go start another pot of tea in the kitchen. Moritaka helped him sit up, flushed the toilet after giving its contents a sour look, and took a damp cloth and used it to start wiping up Nozaki’s mouth.
“So attractive,” he muttered sarcastically as the taller boy scrunched his face at the treatment. There were those who handled falling ill with grace, and then there were those who reverted back to being children. And in Nozaki’s case, he was quite the big child indeed.
When he was finished, he tried to force Nozaki to take his pills, who kept swatting his hands away with a grumpy “Nuh-uh!” at the thought of trying to put anything back into his empty and abused stomach. Eventually Sakura returned with the tea and gave him a pointed glare, one hand on her hip, until he quietly stopped fighting and took his pills, a wounded expression on his face. While she had him at her mercy, she also forced a glass and a half of tea down his throat before he flat-out refused to ingest anything more.
“Well, it’s probably best if I take my leave,” said Moritaka with a sigh as he stood, brushing off his knees. “Best if you just take care of him now, who knows if he might get worse. Besides, we’ve almost finished everything for the project… there’s nothing left we won’t complete over the next couple of days at lunch, wouldn’t you say?”
“You’re probably right,” she agreed with a nod. “Thank you for all your help,” she said amusedly, giving a quick tilt of her head in Nozaki’s direction, “and I’m glad we managed to get a lot done today! Thank you for being such a great partner!”
“Sakuraaa,” Nozaki began to whine, unhappy of the tone the conversation was taking and wanting the orange-haired girl back at his side. He kept a firm grip around the edge of the toilet, however, as he was unsure what would happened if he strayed from it for even a second.
“I’m coming, I’m coming!” she said, shaking her head with a happy sigh. “I’ll just help Moritaka gather his things and go, and then I’ll be right back, I promise.”
The two left him sitting alone by the toilet, shivering at the loss of his warm blankets that had all been left behind on the futon. He heard them shuffling around back over by the table, and as they passed by the bathroom on their way to the entrance Moritaka shave him a shallow bow, more of a dip of the shoulder, before thanking him for the meal and for letting him stay over. Nozaki grunted something back at him, his cheek plastered to the edge of the toilet bowl. The other two failed to hide their giggles as they left him to go find Moritaka’s shoes.
“Again, thanks for coming, Moritaka-kun!” Nozaki could hear their conversation quite clearly from there.
“No problem, though it’s not as if it was your house I had invaded for the evening,” Moritaka replied with an amused tone.
“Ah! R-Right! I’m just at Nozaki-kun’s so often these days haha, it almost feels like home!” Nozaki felt his heart glow, from her words and from the embarrassed laugh she let out. So adorable. He couldn’t let Moritaka take her, no, definitely not.
“Well, you take care now, and make sure you don’t catch whatever he has.”
“Haha I’ll try not too! And thanks again for your help; let me know if there’s ever anything I can do for you.” Nozaki lifted his head at that, worried at what the other could answer her. He would not let Sakura’s kindness be exploited, no matter what!
“I had a pleasant evening; that’s enough for me. Then again… you’ll have to introduce me to that cute friend of yours sometime, how about that?”
Huh? Did he mean… Seo? Nozaki was puzzled. But perhaps… did this mean he had no feelings towards Sakura?!
“All right, but you’ll have to promise not to try and embarrass him too much! Mikorin gets flustered way too easily, and I’ve seen you be a worse flirt than Kashima!” Sakura said as the two shared a laugh.
Wait, what?!?
“I won’t make any promises I can’t keep, Sakura! Anyways, enjoy what’s left of your evening, and I’ll see you tomorrow in class. Good night!”
The sound of the front door closing shut did nothing to clear Nozaki’s confused thoughts. So Moritaka liked… guys? That might eliminate him as a rival (unless if he was bisexual, of course), but Sakura could still have a crush on the megane despite the strong possibility of it going unrequited. Nozaki couldn’t let Sakura’s heart be burdened with such terrible feelings!
Speaking of Sakura, where had she gone? Had he missed her walk past as he had gotten caught up in his thoughts? His questions were answered once she returned with an armload of blankets piled so high they completely obscured her face. She dumped them on the bathroom floor and looked down at him, her hands resting on her hips.
“Feeling any better?” He gave a tentative nod. “Feeling good enough to move back to your bedroom?” She chuckled as he shook his head with a bit more vigour. “That’s fine; we can camp out in here until you feel up to it.”
She started to wrap the blankets around his shivering frame, and Nozaki let out a grateful sigh.
“So, what did you think of Moritaka-kun? He’s an interesting guy, don’t you think?” she asked him brightly. His heart clenched as he dreaded what would follow: would she confess to liking the guy? Did she want Nozaki’s opinion on him as her friend? Was she going to ask him for dating advice, seeing as he was a shoujo mankaga? But he knew he was over-reacting once again when she continued:
“I’ve always thought he would be the type you’d find interesting, Nozaki-kun! Just like with the rest of our friends, I was sure you’d find him a good inspiration for one of your characters! Especially since you don’t have many in the story so far who wear glasses. I figured the group project would be a great opportunity to get to know him better, so I hope you don’t mind that I invited him over.”
He nodded at her words, still stunned, his heartbeat slowly returning to normal. So this meant… that Moritaka was not Sakura’s mystery crush! She was just being a good friend and looking for ideas for Nozaki’s manga. He would have leapt for joy if he hadn’t felt so terrible, so he settled for grinning like a maniac as he rested his head back down on the toilet seat.
When she had finished draping him in blankets, Sakura got up and moved to sit behind him, pulling his head away from the cold porcelain to rest in her lap.
“Just let me know if you feel sick again, and I’ll help you back up,” she said, running her fingers though his hair. “I just don’t want you falling asleep in such a position… Think of your poor neck in the morning!”
Her laugh made him smile. Though these days, was there anything about her that didn’t fill him with joy? He let himself be cradled by her, feeling warm among his blankets, and content now that the matter with Moritaka had been settled. The nausea seemed to be receding for the moment, helped no doubt by the medicine and the tea she had forced him to take. Sakura was so thoughtful and kind. She was here for Nozaki when he needed her, and there was nowhere else in the world he’d rather be than right here in her arms.
I love you, he thought as he drifted off to sleep, missing the way her body stiffened and the hand carding through his hair froze as she gasped.
While her true crush slumbered peacefully in her lap, Sakura was left completely stunned by the words he had mumbled quite by accident, but even more importantly, out loud.
Lonely rivers flow
To the sea, to the sea
To the open arms of the sea
Lonely rivers sigh
"Wait for me, wait for me"
I'll be coming home, wait for me