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Nagito ran along the beach, smiling and giggling as his dog chased him around, tail wagging as she barked, kicking up sand and water with her fluffy paws. Nagito always had trouble running for long periods of time, and it was even more difficult since he'd just gotten out of one of his frequent hospital checkups, but he didn't care. Despite his burning chest, he was having fun. His parents watched from a distance, smiling at him.
Nagito walked over to where his parents were and picked up Clover's favourite ball from her travel bag. She bounded up to him excitedly, tounge lolling out of her mouth as she got into a playful bow. Nagito threw the ball into the water and Clover happily chased it, swimming out to retrieve the ball she loved so much.
Blood on his hands. Fingers threading through white fur. No... No... There's no blood!
She grasped it between her teeth and swam back, holding her head high, proud of her retrieving skills before she shook the water from her fur, soaking Nagito in it. He didn't mind.
N-No...! This is my fault... This is my fault!
Clover dropped the ball back into Nagito's hand, excitedly waiting for him to throw it again. He giggled, throwing it once more and reaching into Clover's travel bag for dog treats. When she returned and dropped the ball, he crouched to her level and pet her fluffy cheeks. "Good girl, Clover, hehe! You're such a good dog!"
He hauled the bloody form out of the road as another car rushed by. Nagito sobbed, burrying his face in her soft fur. "I'm sorry...! This is all my fault!" He sobbed hard, gripping her and shaking her, trying to do anything other than accept the reality.
She ate the treat happily, wagging her tail and licking Nagito's face with a wet dog tongue. He giggled louder, pushing her away. "Groooss Clover! You got doggy breath!" He complained, but still had a happy smile on his face.
His heart is beating hard in his chest, threatening to leap out. He placed his fingers against her neck. He remembered his parents saying this is how you check for a pulse. But she was cold. Stiff. Without a single heartbeat or breath. "M-My dog died and it's all my fault!" He spoke out loud even though he was the only one who could hear it.
"I'm a worthless person..! Horrible..! I got my d-dog killed! I-I don't deserve to live!" Nagito started laughing loudly with tears streaming down his face as he buried his face back onto her cold body.
"You and Clover are so close. Looks like she loves you a lot, Nagito dear." His mom cooed from behind him. His dad chuckled, nodding. "Right? I guess it was good we decided on getting her since it's always been so hard for you to make friends."
Nagito looked over his shoulder at them. His mom hushed his dad and fixed him with a stern look. "You don't need to say that." She hissed through gritted teeth.
Nagito frowned slightly, chewing the inside of his cheek.
Nagito placed Clover's body in a safe spot far away from the road and now stood at the edge, toe tips creeping onto the hot road. Traffic was picking up, so...
He swallowed hard, trembling. "I-If I killed Clover, I deserve to d-die too..!"
Just as he was about to step out into an oncoming car, he heard his parents screaming before hands pulled him away from the road promptly, pulling him into a tight hug against his mother's chest. "Be careful!" She scolded. "You could've gotten injured...!"
"Nagito, honey... Don't wear yourself out too much. You've been running around for hours and you still need another checkup tomorrow." His mother told him. Nagito whined. "Mooom..! Why do I always have to go to the hospital? I wanna run around with Clover some more!"
His dad sighed. "I know, kid, but you have to. The doctors just want to make sure everything is all right. They told us you shouldn't do too much physical activity."
Nagito crossed his arms, pouting. "No fair. I don't like the hospital!"
"I-I wanna die! I killed my doggy so I deserve to die too!" Nagito sobbed, trembling against his mother. Her grip tightened slightly.
"Honey, don't say things like that. It's not funny." She scolded him.
But it's not a joke. He thought.
"W-We need to get her to the vet to see if they can help her!" Nagito begged. If he couldn't kill himself, he at least wanted to try to save Clover.
"Baby... I'm sorry, we can't. There's no saving her. She's dead."
Big blue eyes stared up at Nagito as he made her sit and offered her another treat. Her big fluffy tail wiggled happily against the sandy ground, tip getting wet with ocean water as the waves lapped against her wispy white fur. He was really happy to have Clover.
He missed so much school because of his hospital visits, and even when he did go to school, everyone always said he was weird and creepy and never bothered to talk to him. He only had a friend once because his mom was friends with another mom with a child, but when the kid was old enough to recognize his worthlessness, he left.
He frowned and pushed that thought away, giving her another treat. She loved him unconditionally. She didn't care if he had weird interests or got really attached when anyone have him the slightest affection. She didn't care if she hugged him "too soon" or followed her around constantly. Everyone else said that made him weird, a freak, but Clover loved him no matter what.
"She c-could be alive! They could fix her! If you won't take her, you have to let me die!" He sobbed, gripping her shirt. His mom hushed him softly, lifting him up and rubbing his back as she carried him back inside. He tried to fight her, but it was impossible. He couldn't bear to watch the funeral as her body, which used to be so full of hope and love and loyalty, was now going six feet under.
How despairing...