Work Text:
Ecuador, Seychelles and Cameroon are in a dressing room. The world meeting will start in an hour and they are tired. She fixes her wig and straightens her ribbons. Seychelles has taken on a different look today, a finer blue.
Cameroon is wearing his parka and bright yellow football shirt. He can’t be bothered, there’s not much to do in World Meetings.
Ecuador has arrived with a fine feather in his fedora. He has woven his plait tightly and he’s just as bored as Cameroon. They don’t want to be here, but they have to.
“African meetings are way cooler. They actually serve food and you aren’t allowed to borderline assault the maids.”
“It’s a French problem, Cameroun! And sure Brother is rather-“
“Don’t call him ‘Brother’ in front of me,” Cameroon snapped. “He’s no brother. You’ve spent too long with him.”
“I don’t understand why we can’t be peaceful, they haven’t done much harm.” Seychelles chirped back as she adjusted her buttons. Cameroon mutters about how privilege has made her a mbout. He then goes on a miniature rant about how they could be nothing but peaceful, not if they wanted their little freedom. “We’re not that colonised, still, right?”
“You are so undeniably naive.”
"What's all this talk? Sounding like Reds." Chuckled Ecuador. "We're not 'Reds,' we're just African." Cameroon replied quickly. Ecuador snapped a photo of himself at the mirror. Outside the toilets, cloak rooms and leisure space, a line of bathroom sinks stood against the wall. "Still sounding pretty radical. You should lay back like me. A lot of our world is already being devastated. We can't do much. Our bosses certainly aren't doing much. It's hard, I know, but don't fall for armadilhas ideologicas."
He turned to them with a straight face. "But I agree, the continental meetings are superior. Especially when that loud cowboy, America, starts barking with burgers in his mouth. Uncouth and weird. He threw one of my tortoises once. That's just plain illegal! Had it not been for relations, I would've broken his neck like how I did with Peru."
"You fought Peru?!" Seychelles turned around with her wig, "He's a sweetie!"
"Everybody and their mother in Gran Colombia fought. Think about Yugoslavia." Ecuador replied calmly.
"Yugo-" "Seychelles, we are begging you to go out more. We know you're largely useless and unimportant and unimpressive..."
"I came here with you guys to NOT feel so downtrodden?"
"But please learn more about the world. It'll be worth it. We can punch France together."
"Oh, alright. Yugoslavia's gone?" She huffed.
"Well, Soviet fell and a war ensued. The things that happen." Ecuador shrugged.
"I just want to be seen," Seychelles combed the wig she donned. "I'm always being seen as a tourism object. You've seen how England looks at me."
"That cuck looks at everybody like a snake. Absolutely creepy. But what can we do? He's too darn powerful." Cameroon sighed.
"I straightened my hair and ruined it to be taken seriously. Bro- France said it would make me much more lovely to look at- oh, he was being malicious." Her voice lowered.
"I just wore hats." Cameroon shrugged.
"I wasn't even being looked at." Ecuador smiled weakly. "I'm just discussed by banana companies that sit by USA during summits on Latin America."
Cameroon rose up and took his cloak. "Honestly, fuck all to world peace meetings. I won't hear that angry German yammer on again, nor will I stand that American. We achieve nothing, we still suffer. Our bosses do all of the work anyway." He spat.
"Wait, what if they inquire about our absence?" Seychelles slowly took off her wig and started reaching for her coat anyway.
"I'll put it on my Snapchat. I'm not doing an email. I love these people, but these people suck. I was taught to love suckers."
"Sounding pretty red of you, there." Cameroon smiled.
"Tsk, I'm a staunch, traditional man!" Ecuador laughed.