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It is the third or fourth time we are meeting this week. At some point, I stopped counting. But every time it gets a bit trickier and as well more amusing to slip into the Room of Requirement just before Mr. Filch or his clumsy followers catch us.
It makes me proud to train abreast with Hermione, Ron, and Harry - especially Harry - in Dumbledore´s army. I never was a girl who gives in easily. When there is one thing mum and dad taught us then it is to fight and work hard for the things you believe in and want to protect.
“Make your arm a bit more strained, Ginny!” Hermione breaks in on my thoughts. “Not stiff, but ensure you transfer all your power to your wand.”. “Feel that power!” adds Harry by way of explanation loudly enough for everyone to hear but without looking away.
I know Harry for so long now I cannot remember a day I didn´t think about him, his green shimmery eyes when they are sparkling with joy, his tousled black hair, the way he pronounces my name, and his huge will to protect his loved ones. His purposefulness and fearlessness were always things I really admired. Thinking about him gives me a warm shiver all the time.
Stop Ginny! I admonish myself. This is not the right place or time to reminisce.
Today we are going to train the Expecto Patronus spell. “You have to think about your happiest memory. Something that fills your heart with joy!” Harry starts to explain to the group. “It is a complex spell. If you want to master it and to perform a full-body Patronus you have to put your heart into work.”
Okay, let´s do it. I can do it.
I am thinking about my childhood memories. When we thought everything would be alright. I loved playing with my brothers, being goofy from time to time. Oh, and I love when mum cooks for us, the smell of her delicious dishes that flood the whole house, the creaking of the steps when we are running downstairs. My heart is kind of tickling when I think about my family.
“Expecto Patronum”. My voice is not loud but as Harry said I put my whole heart into it. And – wow! It worked. A silvery-blue horse winds its way from the peak of my wand into the room. “Fantastic Ginny!” cheered Harry beaming with joy standing next to me. My heart leaped.
I watch how my Patronus gallops magically through the room. Others also managed the spell. The horse revolves around Hermione´s lovely otter, jumps over Ron´s playful dog, and crosses Luna´s cute rabbit.
All of a sudden I see Cho, and it takes my breath away. Harry is standing directly behind her. He lays his arm around her to correct the position of her wand. She must feel his breath on her cheek as close as they are. He bows his head and leans a little closer to her ear. She giggles after he whispered something. The way he looks at her gives me a stab in the chest. His eyes light up and I see something in them that I have never seen when he looks at me. I wonder what he said to her. But I can see the same flicker in Cho´s eyes. I get an uneasy feeling watching the two and suddenly I feel very misplaced standing here staring at them.
He only sees you as a sister – as a little sister.
These words are constantly repeating in my head when I turn around and try to focus on something else, no matter what it is.