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Shuichi's POV
I sit in the bathroom like I do every day after school.
Why won't it just stop?
I felt more sharp petals rise from my stomach to my throat. Trying to force them down, I grabbed a nearby glass cup and quickly filled it with sink water. After swallowing the cold liquid, I slide down the bathroom wall to a sitting position.
This is how it's been for the past month and a half. Ever since I realized I had begun to love my good friend.
Kokichi Ouma.
We'd been friends for a year, maybe longer. Over a month ago, I remember I was sitting in my room one day. I was scrolling through my photo gallery, and saw some pictures of Kokichi and I hanging out together.
Then I felt an awful feeling in my stomach.
It was like the usual butterflies you'd get when you look at someone you love, but it has been mixed with something vile. Like poisonous butterflies in my stomach and lungs, forcing themselves up. I ran to the bathroom in my room and began violently throwing up. But it wasn't acidic. It wasn't food. When I opened my eyes, there were violet flower petals in the toilet. There was also a faint smell of lavender around them.
I also noticed a red substance dripping down my chin and a metallic taste filling my mouth.
After doing some research, I found it.
The Hanahaki Disease.
A disease one can get when they fall in love with somebody. Symptoms: throwing up flower petals resembling that person. There are only 2 cures.
1. Tell them your feelings, and if they love you back the petals will go away.
2. Get a surgery to remove the flowers manually, but also lose the ability to ever romantically love again.
Do one of those, or die.
How did it get to this point?
At first I thought it was ridiculous. Vomiting flower petals just because I love Kokichi? That's scientifically impossible. Like something out of a fairy tale.
But the agonizing pain in my lungs said otherwise.
*Knock knock*
I look over to the closed bathroom door at the sound of gentle knocking.
"Come in," my raspy voice mumbles.
The door slowly opens and a brown head of hair with green eyes peeks around.
"Hey dad."
"Hey buddy, you doing okay?" He says, coming inside the room fully. His grey shirt and dark green jacket sways slightly from the door. His ridiculous lime green socks slide closer to me on the ground.
"As okay as I can be," I rub my palms in my eyes. He rubs my shoulder, moving to my back. My dad sits down next to me on the floor and pulls me closer to him.
"Is it worse today than it was yesterday?" He asks softly.
"A little. The thorns hurt pretty bad," I rub my throat. He lets out a thoughtful 'hm' and sits back.
"Are you sure you don't want to just get the surgery? I know it's a big risk, but I don't wanna see you suffer any more. And I know your mother and I will support whatever decision you make," he suggests.
"But if I get the surgery, I can never love again. I wanted to grow up and have a family. I want to be able to love," I say, tears collecting in my eyes.
"I know, but if you don't get the surgery, this disease will only get worse. Maybe you could try telling Ouma-"
"No, I can't tell him. He'd never feel the same way," I cut him off.
"I don't want to scare you, but there isn't a lot of time left. The doctor said this lasts for about 2 months until....you gotta make a decision," he says, avoiding saying the 'd' word. My parents have been trying to ignore that plausible possibility. Of me dying.
"I know. I-I guess I'll confess to him tomorrow, okay? If that doesn't work then I'll get the surgery," I sigh.
"Okay, but remember, your mother and I will help you through this. Whatever happens," he leans my head onto his shoulder and puts his own head on mine. I didn't even notice the tears falling down my cheeks, and the ones collecting in my fathers eyes.
"Did I miss something?" Another head peeks into the bathroom. Her light purple hair in a ponytail flows down to her wrist length behind her white button up shirt. The one long braid and few strands of loose hair on the side stay still.
She must have just gotten home from work.
"Hey honey, we were just having a talk," my father tells her. She nods and leans on the doorframe.
As my ultimate lucky father talks to my detective mother, my mind drifts to Kokichi. His beautiful purple eyes, his shiny yet incredibly soft hair, the way he does his little signature giggle, the way he-
My thoughts are cut off by another stinging in my throat. I move away from my dad and quickly crawl to the toilet. The big purple flowers pour out of my mouth, mixed with thorns and blood. It feels like I'm vomiting my intestines.
Why does love have to hurt so much?
When it finally stops, I turn my head to see both of my parents looking at me with concerned faces.
My mother grabs a washcloth from the cabinet and gets it a damp. I sit against the bathtub and my mom crouches down beside me. She begins to wipe the blood around my mouth, running her hand through my navy hair.
Before I begin to slip into unconsciousness, I see my parents give each other one last look, as if speaking telepathically.
Then everything goes black.
—꧁♥︎꧂—
"Now are you sure you can go to school today? I don't want to overwork your body too much. You lost a lot of blood yesterday," my dad says.
"I'm fine dad. And if I don't go then I won't be able to confess to Kokichi," I say with a little notecard in hand.
"Okay. But make sure to come straight home if you're not feeling well."
He wraps his arm around me in a hug, and then let's me go. My purple haired mother walks over and kisses my forehead.
"Have a good day Shu," she says calmly, smiling.
I nod and open the door.
"Bye guys!" I say, draping my back back over my shoulders.
"Bye sweetie! See you after school!" They wave and I head out.
I didn't know it then, but that was the last time I would ever see them.
On my way to school, I run into Kokichi on the sidewalk.
"Hey Shumai! Ready for another boring day?" He says, reaching his arms behind his head.
"Uh, y-yeah. Are you?" I mentally curse myself for stuttering.
"Nope! I forgot everything from yesterday, and I have a test in every class!" He lies.
"Kokichi, I have most of the same classes as you," I say.
"Ah shoot, you got me again Sushi!"
Sushi? That's a new one.
We get closer to Hope's Peak and part ways for our first classes. When I sit down at my desk, I pull out the notecard with my practice confession.
——
Hey Kokichi! I know this might sound weird, and you probably don't feel the same, but I really like you. And I would love it if we could go on a date sometime.
——
I'm not gonna give it to him, I need to confess in person. This was just a script. As I'm thinking, I feel more flowers rush to my throat. Being in class, I just force them down like I usually do at school. I can feel the sharp thorns and soft petals go back down my throat. It makes me shiver.
C'mon Saihara. Just make it until you confess.
I have about 2 weeks left until the petals kill me, so that should be enough time.
Right?
As I move throughout the Friday, more flowers start growing inside me.
Just keep going.
I'll confess to Kokichi right after my last period, so that if there's a ton of flowers I can get rid of them afterwards if it goes south. It's only my 6th period and I can already feel it building. Knowing I won't be able to keep them in much longer, I need to go to the bathroom.
"Yes Saihara?"
"May I use the restroom Mr. Monotaro?"
"Of course, but be back soon," he dismisses me. Kaede looks at me, worried since I never leave class for anything. I ignore her and leave.
I never told anyone at school about my disease, not even Kaede. Only my parents know. I couldn't burden anybody else, knowing that I could die. I know if Kokichi found out and he didn't return my feelings, he'd feel awful. I didn't want that.
Leaving the classroom, I sprint through the empty hallway and into the nearest bathroom. Opening the biggest stall, I silently thank the fact that nobody else is in here to hear me vomiting.
After about five minutes, the flowers don't stop. Neither does the blood. I can hardly get a breath in between puking. Tears flow from my eyes as I feel the flowers fill up my lungs.
So this is how I die?
I thought I had 2 weeks left?
What would my parents think?
What would Kokichi think?
The thought of Kokichi only brings up more flowers. The violent sounds of gagging is the only thing I hear as a smell of lavender fills my nostrils. Soon, there's no more room in the toilet for any more flowers. But they keep coming. Huge, beautiful flowers start falling out onto the floor around me, mixed in with my blood.
Then, all the coughing stops. The vomiting, the flowers, the thorns, the blood.
It all finally stops.
I'm left there on the school bathroom floor, surrounded by my own flowers and blood.
Lifeless, and feeling love for the last time.
—꧁♥︎꧂—
Kokichi's POV
School let us out early today for some reason. Hope's Peak never does that, no matter what. Pretty soon, rumors start spreading like wildfire.
"I heard there was a murder."
"No, it was a suicide!"
"I thought they just, died?"
"That's ridiculous Soda-kun, people can't just die!"
Ignoring everybody's rumors, I walk out to the front to meet up with my beloved Shuichi. Only he doesn't come.
Maybe he left early? Yeah, I bet that's it! He probably didn't bother waiting since it's a surprise early dismissal.
My heart hurts a bit at the thought, but I quickly brush it away and walk home.
——
Shuichi hasn't texted me all weekend. I've texted him every day since Friday but he hasn't even read them.
What could he possibly be doing? All Shuichi does is read detective novels.
Then the rumors from the other day start to catch up to me.
Is that why he's not responding?
No, there's no way he was murdered.
I get ready for school, today being Monday, and walk downstairs. My mom sits there with a sad frown on her face, holding her phone.
"Hey mom, you good?" I say.
"Kichi, do you wanna stay home today?" She asks out of nowhere.
"Huh? I didn't plan on it. Why?"
"You'll find out today I suppose," she walks away, and waves me goodbye. I wave and walk out the door.
I don't see Shuichi at the sidewalk, so I stroll to school alone. But then, I see Kaede.
She might know where Shuichi is!
"Hey bakamatsu!" I shout. She turns around to face me running up to her.
"Hello Ouma-kun!" She smiles. We're not on bad terms, both being friends with the emo detective, so she's pretty cool.
"Do you know where my beloved Shumai is? He hasn't texted me all weekend," I pout.
"I don't, sorry. The last time I saw him was my 6th period class on Friday. He ran to the bathroom and didn't come back the rest of the class," she says thoughtfully.
"Wow, thanks for nothing then!" I begin to walk away to my first class.
As people start to sit down, the intercom starts making a static noise, indicating someone's about to speak.
"Attention students of Hope's Peak High! Everybody must meet in the gym by 8:15 am today for an important announcement. Make sure to bring your tissues, cause it's a sad one!"
Then it goes silent.
Students, including myself, make their way out into the hall towards the gym.
"Hey shrimpdick!" My friend, Miu, calls to me.
"Hey whore-chan!" I greet back. She squeals as usual.
We walk to the gym together and pick out seats on the bleachers towards the back. Out of the corner of my eye, I think I see Shuichi's parents, Naegi and Kirigiri of the Future Foundation. But then I can't see them, so I shake away the image.
"Alrighty kiddos! Now that your all here, we can finally get started!" Our headmaster, Mr. Monokuma, says.
"I wonder what this dumshit is gonna talk about this time," Miu whispers to me and I nod.
"I'm sure you're all wondering why you got the rest of this recent Friday off. Well I'm here to tell you, that we've had a student kick the bucket at this very school."
You can hear some surprised gasps come from the crowd. Getting a closer look around, I see that I was right. Shuichi's parents are standing towards the back, semi hidden from view.
Why would his parents be here?
Wait.
My eyes widen.
Oh no.
No no no
Please let me be wrong.
Please god no.
"Hey, you good? You look like you've seen a ghost," Miu says, noticing me. My hands begin to tremble.
"Because this is a serious matter, I will be as well. It's rude to disrespect the dead after all."
I feel tears prick at my eyes, and I begin to hyperventilate in my head.
A picture appears on the projected screen behind the principle.
"Shuichi Saihara, the Ultimate Detectice. Son of Kyoko Kirigiri, also the Ultimate Detective, and Makoto Naegi, the Ultimate Lucky Student. He was found dead on Friday in the school bathroom surrounded by purple flowers. What an odd state am I right?" he announces.
My heart drops.
Gasps erupt throughout the room. Some students look like they couldn't care less, while others already have tears streaming down their faces.
"Oh-Oh my god," Miu's tone is laced in a mixture of disgust and surprise.
She's not the only one that knows about my love for Shuichi. Some people figured me out, while I just told others. Miu, Kaede, Rantaro, Nagito, Tenko, and Himiko all know. Kaede supported me, even after being rejected by the detective. I can't imagine how she's feeling right now. Probably similar to me.
No, there's no way he's dead.
He wouldn't do that.
Shumai is strong, he wouldn't just die?!
Would he?
No
He can't.
I didn't even notice Mr. Monokuma had continued talking while Miu placed a hand on my shoulder. I could hear her speaking, but I wasn't listening. It was just all muffled noises.
I was shaking, trying my best not to let the tears fall and show weakness. I was subconsciously shaking my head, muttering out small 'no's. My hands formed into fists and they gripped my pants tightly.
After some more talking, people started getting up to leave. A different hand on my shoulder stopped me.
—꧁♥︎꧂—
Third POV
"Ouma-san?" Naegi placed a shoulder on Kokichi's.
The purplenette let out a thoughtful hum and turned around to face whoever had grasped him. His eyes widened as he realized it was Shuichi's father.
"O-Oh, Mr. Naegi. I-I'm sorry about your son," he said, cursing himself for stuttering.
Makoto nodded. "And I'm sorry about your friend."
They both stand in their own silence, surrounded by students chattering.
"Can I invite you to our house after school today? There's something I would like to show you of Shuichi's," he says.
"Yeah, I can come now actually. Lead the way," he tells Miu to head to class and follows Mr. Naegi out of the gym. His wife, Mrs. Kirigiri is standing there. The worldwide stone-faced detective's eyes and face are now tear stained and red. It was a rare sight to see.
Kokichi felt a little awkward around the two for no particular reason he could come up with. As they reach his car, Kokichi gets in the back seat and Kirigiri sits in the passenger. Her arms folded on top of her lap, waiting patiently for her husband to start the car.
The drive to their home was dead silent, nobody knowing what to say. The tears in the smaller boys eyes were almost ready to fall, with his breathing still rigid.
The car stopped, and they all headed out. Kokichi looked up at the house he's seen many times before. Him and the navy haired detective would pass by or hang out there all the time.
At least when they were younger.
They walked in and all lazily kicked off their shoes at the entrance.
"I'll show you to his room," Makoto says. The violet detective just sat down at the kitchen table with her head in her gloved palms.
He led Ouma up a few stairs into the used-to-be-detective's childhood room. The walls were a cyan color, with a beige carpet covering the floor. A large desk sat by the far left wall with a bed pushed up against the middle wall. He had grey bedsheets, and to the bed's left was a small closet holding his school uniforms and other clothes. The room looked practically untouched. The desk was the same way Shuichi had left it, and the bed was exactly how he had made it that Friday morning.
"I found this under his bed the other day, I figured you'd want to see it," Makoto says, reaching underneath the bed. He sets a large cardboard box on the bed.
"I'll...let you look through that. Excuse me," he left abruptly, presumably to go talk to his wife downstairs who was, with no doubt, crying.
Kokichi carefully sat on his knees on his best friends bed, as if one wrong move would shatter it completely. He peaked his head over the top of the box labeled 'memories.'
He has a memory box?
Well, I guess it's not that surprising.
He opened the lid and looked inside the mysterious box. Ouma immediately took notice of the few frames with photos of him and Shuichi in them. He picked one of them up from when they were at a local festival a few years prior. Kokichi smiled sadly as he picked up more picture frames, reminiscing in the times they spent together.
There were a few other items such as things Kokichi had gotten him at those festivals, little notes they passed in class, and small presents he would give the bluenette.
"He really kept this?" Ouma's eyes lit up at the sight of a rock. His pale hands picked it up, rubbing his thumb over the smooth surface. It was just a normal rock he had picked up and given to his friend somewhat as a joke. But here it was in his hand.
I thought he would just throw it away or something. I meant that much to him?
Below the purplenettes stuff, there were more items relating to Kaede, Kaito, Maki, and even people like Miu and Tenko. He kept every single memory he made with them. Almost as if he knew he were gonna die.
Kokichi must have been looking at the box for over 15 minutes, so he decided to look around some more.
Ouma got up and placed his feet on the soft carpet. His eyes spotted a small note on his bedside. It looked crumbled up and almost damp even. Then it hit Kokichi like a truck.
They must have cleaned out his pockets when they...found him.
He shivered and opened the note with careful hands.
Kokichi would never forget what he saw in that note.
———
Hey Kokichi! I know this might sound weird, and you probably don't feel the same, but I really like you. And I would love it if we could go on a date sometime.
———
Tears fell from his eyes as he placed a hand over his mouth to muffle the sobs in his throat.
He-
He wanted to tell me that day?
"He really loved you y'know?" Ouma turned around at the sound of a voice.
Makoto Naegi stood there, leaning against the doorway with a sad smile. Kokichi just simply waited for the father to continue.
"He had for awhile. Shu said he was finally gonna tell you on Friday. I guess he never got to," Naegi shrugged, as if it didn't bother him one bit. But it did. It rotted his core that his son was so close. But he figured none of his luck went with Shuichi on that sad day.
Kokichi's eyes just continued to fill with tears and let them fall. His Shumai, his beloved, was gone forever. The short male just fell to his knees, weeping. His violent sobs were the only noise filling the room. Then he felt an arm wrap around his shoulders.
"It's okay, you didn't know," Kokichi looked up for a small second to see Shuichi's father with hot tears rolling down his face as well.
Kokichi felt so useless. Like he could've done something. Like he could've prevented the death of his beloved. His best friend.
"The funeral is Wednesday in the evening. I hope you'll be able to make it Kokichi," a sad voice came from the doorway. Both males raised their heads to see Kyoko, still as stone faced as ever. But if you looked into her eyes you could tell.
She was broken.
Kokichi gave her a shaky nod and continued to cry.
Why couldn't I save him?
—꧁♥︎꧂—
The funeral had finished, and there was a crowd of students standing before the newly made gravestone.
Kaito had Maki silently crying into his shirt, Kaede was holding onto Rantaro. Himiko and Tenko had left a few minutes prior due to their violent and loud sobs. Miu was trying to comfort her short friend who was trembling.
Every single one of them had tears rolling down their faces. They were all so used to Kokichi's crocodile tears that they didn't know how to react to his real ones.
One by one, they all said a quick goodbye to their buried friend and walked away.
Kokichi could hardly believe them.
How can they just walk away like this'll all be over tomorrow?!
How were these his friends? They don't even care.
"Hey Kokichi? It's getting kinda late, I think we should both head home-"
"No." Kokichi cut Kaede off. They were the last 2 there.
"I know you miss him, we all do, but he's gone. You gotta keep your chin up and-"
"Let me guess, you want me to just 'be positive' right?" He asked, spitting out the words as if they were venom in his mouth.
"N-No of course not! But you still need to take care of yourself," she said softly.
"You can go, but I'm staying longer," he says, his tone irritated.
"I-....okay Ouma. Have a good rest of your night," she says walking away down the narrow path.
Kokichi finally lets out a sob he was holding. He clutched the black cap in one hand, the hat that belonged to the young detective. Some of his tears fell on it, making the surface damp.
He took the blue and purple flowers in his other hand and put it on Shuichi's grave.
"I never got to tell you this but...I love you too," he managed to choke out through his sobbing.
Kokichi managed to turn and walk away, holding the black hat to his chest.
Ouma didn't know that those flowers were the very thing that killed his friend.