Chapter Text
the first time sirus coughed and saw the blood specked flowers consequently perched on the crook of his arm, he was un-startled.
he was surrounded by imbeciles with the ability to curse and jinx as they pleased. he'd likely pissed some wanker off without even intending to and now he was hacking up greenery.
sirius was almost amused at the scenario; of all the curses they could choose between they had picked such an oddly poetic one.
it was something remus would choose. he could picture the lanky, sweater donned boy grinning slightly and quoting some deep line wryly. remus had a variety of grins and sirius could identify them within seconds, determine how genuine the dimple he wore was.
remus had the type of smile that could convince you of anything. sirius knew he could be talked into moving countries if he was flashed even a hint of that grin.
and that grin was ducking through the crowd of colourful ties, directly toward him.
"si, peter accidentally hexed himself into a ferret in transfig, you have to get your ass over there."
remus embodied the phrase "honey smooth voice." sirius could never take his threats seriously when they were said with such a gentle undertone.
"fucksake how many times is it now?" he snorted in response, as remus dragged him by his wrist.
"im sure james has a table drawn up somewhere, i know he has one about lily." remus laughed, and sirius wondered if the butterflies this boy gave him would kill him.
"there's no table large enough to count the amount of times he's made a fool of himself in front of lily."
"aw give him a break, maybe she's into total idiots."
remus veered into the classroom beside them, groaning as peter came into view.
"peter i just got si here, you couldn't have waited?"
peter gaped at the boy.
"im so sorry I didn't remain as a ferret for sirius' amusement."
"your human form amuses me just as much pete, don't stress." sirius winked.
any replies were cut off by sirius' sudden heaves and gasps. he held his hand to his mouth, grasping the soft petals that landed in his palm and swiftly shoving them into his pocket.
he would never hear the end of it if they knew he was coughing up roses and daisies.
"mate, you good there? sound like you've lost a lung." peter snorted.
no, but some petulant old lady has lost her prize winning rose bush.
"yeah im fine, probably just a winter thing."
remus tugged at his arm and he gulped, turning to face the worried expression plastered on his face.
"si, are you sure you're okay? you never get sick. you once drank month old milk as a dare and if anything you seemed more lively." remus paused, face twisted as if he'd found a new concern.
sirius could barely breathe. he wasn't sure if it was the flowers or the fact that remus was not only worried but knew him so well, but his lungs felt as if they'd shrunk to half their size.
"of course moony, you worry too much." sirius grinned. remus looked barely convinced.
-
two weeks later sirius was still heaving flowers from his chest, and he was starting to doubt that it was a harmless curse.
it was becoming increasingly difficult to hide the slightly bloody flowers that emerged every time he coughed, and remus' growing suspicions were making him dangerously observant.
james and peter suspected nothing. the two showed fleeting concern for their friend when he erupted in fits of coughs in the common room or choked in the great hall, but they found no reason to study sirius closely.
remus was deeply invested in proving that sirius was hiding that his cough hid deeper things.
sirius was developing so many petals he could grow a goddamn garden himself.
he had developed ways to discard of the fragile red leaflets without raising questions. he had various jars and a few awkwardly stuffed closet petals (the irony was not lost on him), and occasionally he let the breeze take them when he had the chance.
in potions sirius barely had the chance to stuff the petals away as remus practically teleported next to him the second he heard a cough.
"it's been two weeks sirius, you need to see a nurse, or even spell yourself to health." sirius glared into the wide eyes of the taller boy leaning over him.
"moony it's barely a cough, there's no need to sound any alarms."
he had in fact, sounded many alarms.
so much so one sleepless night he took an endeavour down the medical magical side of the library.
the books hed gathered contained horror stories of everything from growing animal limbs to losing a head by natural causes.
he decided he'd rather any of those after reading the definition of hanahaki.
where the victim of unrequited or one-sided love begins to vomit or cough up the petals and flowers of a flowering plant growing in their lungs, which will eventually grow large enough to render breathing impossible if left untreated.
it felt as if he'd been stabbed directly in the chest.
he wanted to call it fake, a stupid tale used to scare people. but he had racked his mind for any curse that resembled hanahaki and come up empty.
sirius also went to a school of magic, and decided he should probably have more faith due to that.
unrequited love.
he had no question on who the unrequited love was for. he glanced across the moonlit room, to see the boy sound asleep, bathed in a halo of starlight.
remus.
remus. remus with his curls and his oversized sweaters and his stupid metaphors. remus with his adorable grins and his empathy and his habit of making everyone love him.
remus with his stupid hugs and bright eyes and godawful midnight ventures to unsuccessfully steal snacks.
remus, who didn't love him back.