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Tommy was frustrated and hurt and everything just felt like it was falling apart right before her eyes.
All she wanted was a baby, that was it, just the chance at a healthy pregnancy and a healthy little baby.
She wanted to be a mother more than anything.
And yet, sitting here in the doctor’s office getting the news that she once again wasn’t pregnant, it started to feel like it would never happen.
“What’s on your mind over there love?” She snapped her attention over to Charles, watching as he offered her a soft smile and she sighed.
He had been such a good sport through all of this and it wasn’t fair that he wasn’t getting to be rewarded with being a father.
She knew that he wanted it almost as badly as she wanted to be a mother and it killed her that she was taking this away from her.
“It just…” She gripped her hands together tightly, her nails digging into the palms of her hands as she held back the tears. “It’s starting to feel like this is never going to happen.”
It was silly, she knew that, because there were other ways to have a child.
They could do surrogacy, they could adopt, this wasn’t their only option.
But there was just something about having a baby of her own, of being pregnant and being able to bring a new life into this world that just made her feel, happy.
“It will happen honey.” He reached over and separated her hands, gripping them tightly in his own as he locked eyes with her. “It’s just taking a little longer than we first thought, that’s all.”
“It’s been two years Charles.” In reality, she knew that two years was nothing compared to what some women went through, but she wasn’t getting any younger and neither was her body. “I’m getting close to the age where doctor’s are gonna start telling us it isn’t wise to try to do this the natural way.”
“Since when have you ever done what you were told?” He was joking and she knew it, but it didn’t help her feel better like he probably thought it would. “Look, T, it won’t always be like this, okay? I promise you, we’re gonna get through this and we’re gonna come out on the other side victorious.”
“You don’t know that though.” She wanted to be optimistic about it, she really did, but it was getting so hard to do that sometimes.
“No, you’re right, I don’t.” He leaned in and pressed a kiss to her forehead and she let out a soft sigh. “But I do have hope that it’ll happen, and I have faith, and sometimes, that’s gotta be enough right?”
The words that she wanted to say sounded all wrong in her head so she simply nodded, offering him a smile as she tried to calm herself down.
She knew that they had time, but she also knew that sometimes, time wasn’t always on your side.
“Now, let’s get out of here and go home and get some rest.” That idea sounded wonderful, because she was exhausted and she knew he had to be too. “Maybe we can even try for this baby the old fashioned way tonight?”
He waggled his eyebrows at her and made what she assumed was supposed to be a flirty face and she couldn’t help but bust out laughing.
“Oh Charles.” She reached out and gripped his cheeks tightly, pulling him close as she pressed a quick kiss to his lips. “What would I ever do without you?”
“Let’s hope you never have to find out.” Nodding softly she allowed herself to be pulled down off the exam table, Charles tightening his hand around hers as they walked out of the doctor’s office and out into the afternoon sunshine.
It had been raining for three days now and the bright glow from above was incredibly welcoming.
Maybe it was a sign that things were finally going to be okay.