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There was clearly something in the air. He refused to name it, he refused to accept it. Walking from class to class with his head down. Scuttling away from the common room as soon as lessons finish. Or staying there late into the evening when their dorm was… occupied.
James and Lily were affected, suddenly showing more PDA than normal. Their cuddles and kisses in the common room turning into something more than anyone should witness. Peter scuttling off late at night and not returning till way too early into the morning, no one saying anything because lord knows Wormtail needs a secret. Other couples from other houses all being a tad more touchy feely than normal, hands wrapped together as they walked through the snow in Hogsmeade. Heads bent down in sweet little murmurs.
There was a sense of need and urgency in the air. Christmas was approaching, and it was coming fast.
There were a couple of weeks left until they were all free to go home, celebrate with family, friends and- well, significant others. And remus would be stuck at Hogwarts, the moon falling on Christmas Eve. Its not like he wanted to go back home anyways, his mum and dad started spending the winters in Spain. He would hate to drag them back for just Christmas.
Remus was, let’s just say, salty about the situation. He was fed up with all the love in the air. He was fed up with seeing James and Lily at the breakfast table. He was fed up of seeing the two ravenclaw girls share a sweet kiss in the morning. He was so fed up with seeing all the Christmas cards come in via owls in the morning.
The owls swooping in and their legs tied with colourful envelopes, weighed down slightly by large brown packages. Breakfast full of joy and laughter, blushes spreading across everyone’s cheeks, whispers between friends and giggles from girls who just can’t believe he sent her a christmas card!
Good lord he was so done with it.
“Remus, I'm sure it’s just gotten lost by the owls.” James called over the noise to him.
“Prongs, I don't care.” he said bluntly. His mind was more focused on the 12 inches that were due next week. He would have to get started on that soon.
“Oh? So you staring at sirius opening his envelopes is-”
“-shush James, leave him alone.” Lily, sweet Lily Evans, cut in and saved his soul. “If he says he doesn’t care, he doesn’t care.” and giving her boyfriend a final thump on the shoulder James finally dropped it. allowing Remus to cover his own blush that was creeping up his neck in peace. Meanwhile Lily was grinning like a niffler finding a brilliant treasure.
Turning his head down towards his plate, he kept his head far away from Sirius. Far away from his pile of colourful envelopes, with cards that would inevitably end up in their dorm. Far away from his stormy grey eyes that would always draw him in. Far away from his midnight black hair that was kept up with his wand in a bun-
He picked up his tea and chose to ignore, chose to ignore the blush creeping up his neck. Being brutally blind to the glint of hope in the stormy grey eyes, to the left of him that flickered out as he kept his head down.
He would not ruin his friendship between Sirius. It was one of the few things he could count on. He could count on the boy to know when he needed help. He could count on the boy to be with him during transformations. He could always count on him to be there after nightmares with open arms and soft mummers. He couldn’t ruin this friendship.
——————
He walked out of the library that evening with a pounding headache, a craving for some sweet chocolate and in dire need of a massive hug from the boy he knew would be in their dorm right now. Godric, he didn’t realise it was so late, the sun had set way too early thanks to winter. Madame Pince practically shooing him out because she wanted to get to bed. So that left Remus taking a slow walk back to the common room.
As soon as he made his way there he kept his eyes down had he walked past the sofas he knew held James and Lily. Eyes cast down until he reaches the stairs towards the boys dorms. Slowly taking the stairs up and up until he reached their room.
Gently opening the door he crept in, his bag that was previously slung over his shoulder dropping by the door as the cold air hit him.
“Close the window pad’s,” he murmured as he walked over to his bed, sitting down he noted that his bed was slightly warm, just like someone had been sat there for a while. He pulled on a jumper he kept around and looked up at Sirius. He was sat in their window seat and had a cigarette pinched between his fingers, his other hand going to close the window. “Wait, wait.”
Sirius paused and watched with his mouth slightly open as Remus grabbed a bar of chocolate and came and sat opposite him in the window seat. He opened the bar and broke off a corner and popping it in his mouth. Fingertips lightly brushing his lips. Sirius couldn’t help but inhale deeply, eyes transfixed on Remus.
He held out the cigarette, expecting Remus to take it gently like he normally did. Expected him to take a puff then hand it back. Godric knows he wasn’t expecting Remus to lean forward a little, hand going down to the wrist of the hand that was holding the cigarette. Pulling Sirius’ hand up, gently, so he was the one holding the cigarette as the bud grew bright red as he took a long drag. His fingers lightly brushing Remus’ lips, his eyes widened slightly. He couldn't help but watch the pure bliss that was painting Remus’ face.
A heavy blush attacked Sirius’ cheeks, making them glow in the moonlight. He couldn't help but look away, lest Remus catch him. But it was too late.
Remus’ hand had crept down and brought his face back by his chin. Eyes looking over the blush that was on Sirius’ face before blowing out the smoke. He kept his eyes trained on Sirius’ face through the haze. Appreciating how each swirl of smoke reminded him of the other boys hair, and how he colour was all too similar to his eyes.
Sirius was sat with his cheeks ablaze, he was used to Remus staring but not like this. The look in his eye and the soft smile that stretched his lips was all new. He couldn't believe what he was seeing. He was still lost in his own little world when Remus’ lips gently pressed against his. Just for a quick, fleeting second he wasn’t sure if he was imagining it or not until it happened again. Remus hands coming to lightly cup his face, lips tasting of chocolate. He couldn't help but gasp lightly and he kissed him back with all the emotion he could. His face still ablaze but he couldn't care.
After a moment they seperated. Remus leaning down and resting his head in the junction between his neck and shoulder. And he murmured, “So much better than a damn hug.” And made Sirius’ chest rumble with laughter.
They both knew something had changed between them. There was a shift in the air, and Remus couldnt be mad about it. He was warm and safe with a furiously blushing boy and he couldn’t help but grin at how happy that made him.