Work Text:
Jeff looks at the license as he sits in the driver's seat. He stares at it with tears welling in his eyes. He throws his license landing on the passenger seat. Nick used to sit there. Not yet having his license. Always there with Jeff when he goes out. But he's not here now. He's not in the car. He's not sitting in the passenger seat. He's not listening to the playlist they made that's more than a day long. He's not here.
Jeff starts the car and drives to the gas station. He goes inside and roams the aisles. Getting himself soda, chips, chocolate, and water, he goes to the checkout area. The cashier sees his puffy eyes. He tries to smile but immediately looks down feeling a tear sliding down his face. Jeff and Nick used to come to this gas station all the time. He feels the sobs coming. The cashier, who's probably in her 20's, tells him the price and Jeff hands her some money. Anna(the cashier's name as it says on her tag that's on her shirt) asks him if he's okay and Jeff shakes his head softly. He felt tears roam down his face. He grabbed the bag and told her to keep the change, his voice sounding shaky.
He drives to the park and goes to the bench with the bag in his hand. He looks at their old texts.
nick !! <3
—
n: hey, what was the news you had to tell me at school? sorry i wasn't there for lunch. my mom picked me up. had an appointment with the dentist.
j: i got my driver's license !!
n: NO WAY WHAT THE HELL??????
SEND!
j: *photo attached*
n: fuck dude. no way, that's not you. oh my god!!?!!!! so proud.
j: don't worry i'll take you on late night drives.
____
Jeff brings his legs to his chest and puts his head between his knees. He looks up. Mesmerized by the almost dark cloudy sky. He finally does it. He lets it all out. The tears. The loud sobs. Fortunately no one is around. Jeff gets up, still crying, and grabs small pebbles. He throws them in the water yelling.
“Why?!”
“Why couldn’t we stay?!”
“What happened?!”
“Why” and just lets out a scream he didn’t know he had been holding.
Most of the warblers knew what had happened and the council cancelled the rehearsal the day after the breakup. No one asked any questions. The now broken up couple still sat at the same table. They didn't sit next to each other, they sat apart. Different seats.
Jeff dropped to the ground and looked up. He saw pink. The sun is setting. He went back to the bench and opened his soda and chugged it all at once. He opened his chips and ate a few before going back to his car.
He wanted so bad to drive past the places they went.
“C’mon, Jeff, you know better. Don’t cry over a boy. Y’know way fucking better!”
“Don’t fucking cry!”
“Just drive the fuck home!”
He made it home. His eyes are puffy but he is smiling. He gave himself a pep talk. Wasn’t the best but it worked.
He rushed up the stairs, ignoring his family watching a movie in the living room.