Work Text:
I thought that you'd remember, but it seems that you forgot
It’s hard for me to blame you when you were already lost
Nayeon can’t remember a day in her life that didn’t involve Mina in a way, the Japanese girl would either be physically around Nayeon, messaging the taller girl or even be mentioned in a conversation in her group of friend’s which Mina is a part of as well or by her family who over the years have grown very fond of the girl.
Nayeon was just sitting on the chairs in her balcony with Mina asleep next to her, she felt at peace… at home?
Nayeon enjoyed the night sky ahead of them, the cool breeze making Mina’s fringe flow in the air which Nayeon would fix everytime they would dance, she knew the younger girl liked looking prim and proper, like an elegant young lady, unlike her who was messier and unorganised. As far as Nayeon knew, Mina already had a plan for her future, after graduating high school she was to attend JYP College and study to become a surgeon like her father then more details that Nayeon knew off by heart. Nayeon felt a bit out of place in Mina’s plans but as her bestfriend she would always be a part of those plans… but not in the way Nayeon wanted.
The penguin band-aid around Mina’s fingers reminded Nayeon a sweet memory of how they met. They were in kindergarten and Mina just moved to Korea, in all honesty, Nayeon didn’t even knew Mina existed until she bumped into the girl who was walking into the classroom by herself while Nayeon was trying to run out. Long story short, Mina fell on the ground and got a cut on her finger which Nayeon immediately tended and apologised for, ever since then they were inseparable, Nayeon even introduced Mina to Jeongyeon and Jihyo and they became their own little friend group ever since kindergarten.
--
In the 5th grade, Nayeon was having a hard time with her studies and she was on the bridge of being moved down to the next classes. Of course, her friends would try to help her but she is a stubborn bunny but there was an even more hard-headed penguin next to her. Everyday Mina would help Nayeon study and do the homework they were assigned, they honestly were lucky that they were in the same homeroom and classes for everything otherwise Nayeon really would be struggling thanks to her pride.
When the second semester finally ended and Nayeon’s hell too, they celebrated the end of the school year, the start of the summer and for Nayeon getting her grades back up. Jihyo, Jeongyeon and Mina were invited for a family dinner at the Im’s, it’s nothing new for the girls since they’ve been having sleepovers at each other’s houses, sometimes even getting invited to family functions, they’re extended family loved the girls.
Nayeon looked over at Mina who was sitting on the balcony chairs on Nayeon’s balcony while the other two were eating snacks by Nayeon’s dresser. Nayeon swore that Mina was the most beautiful girl she knew, most beautiful girl she would ever know. Mina’s gummy smile presented itself when Mina noticed Nayeon staring at her. Mina’s moles were highlighted on her face and Nayeon can just see the beautiful constellation painted on the heaven-made angel named Myoui Mina.
“What? Is something on my face?”
“Yeah”
“Eh?! What is it?? Why didn’t you tell me earlier?!”
“Because it’s beauty” Nayeon stepped up to the shorter girl and gave her a soft bunny smile which Mina responded with a blush, looking down to the ground trying to hide it. Nayeon giggles and Mina punches her lightly by the shoulder
“Im Nayeon!”
“Myoui Mina”
“Nayeon and Mina sitting on a tree! K-I-S-S-I-N-G!” The Japanese and Korean girl heard from the other side of the door of the balcony, they saw Jihyo and Jeongyeon pretending to kiss each other, it looked disgusting as they were overreacting it. Mina looked down all shy and blushing while Nayeon had a frown on her face, she was about to open the door but the other two already ran away laughing.
Before Nayeon could enter her room again, she grabbed Mina’s hand and pulled her back into the room.
--
I gave you all of me, now you don't wanna be involved
In the 8th grade, Jihyo, Jeongyeon and Nayeon were introduced to Momo and Sana who were new students to their high school, they were new friends of Mina who instantly bonded because they were all Japanese. The three Korean’s have never seen Mina make new friends so fast, the girl was usually quiet and kept to herself unless it was just them three so it was a new side of Mina they have yet to see. Ever since that lunch, the six girls were inseparable, they were like six peas in a pod.
I really gotta face it
In the 9th grade, the whole gang met Dahyun, Chaeyoung and Tzuyu who were only a year below them, it was a surprise they didn’t know the younger students especially that for one Nayeon and Sana are social butterflies who are explicitly loud, Jihyo was a student leader, Jeongyeon was in the basketball team and Momo and Mina were in the dance club, it’s not like they were famous in the school like the seniors, they were just well known as individuals and for their group being in the smart classes, knowing each other for a long time, in their extracurriculars and for being masterminds behind the pranks.
Nayeon can’t forget the day they met the three younger girls, it was a game changer in all honesty. A game changer Nayeon didn’t need. A game changer Nayeon didn’t want.
Mina looked heavenly that day as usual since Nayeon always finds her beautiful, over the years Nayeon has developed a crush on her bestfriend and as far as she knows, Mina doesn’t know and she thinks Mina doesn’t like her back – little does she know.
Mina was still in her dance practice clothes, her fringe swept to the side and hair a bit messy. Momo was already there since she made up a lie just so she can eat, seriously the girl has a giant appetite but she loves – and insists on getting free food, especially if it’s from her dearest friends, much to all their disappointment.
Nayeon was sitting next to Jihyo with a spare seat next to her which was reserved everyday for to the Japanese beauty. Mina finally appeared behind Nayeon and placed her bag down on the table in front of them, she gave Nayeon that who-are-they look which Nayeon took the pleasure of introducing the new comers.
“This is Chou Tzuyu, she’s in the archery club. This is Kim Dahyun, I’m pretty sure she’s in the school paper and broadcasting club” Tzuyu extended her hand out for Mina to shake which the girl gladly took, and Dahyun put two fingers to her crown and flicked forward. “This is my new child, Son Chaeyoung” Nayeon pointed to the blonde girl next to Mina who was too busy focusing on her doodles rather than noticing Mina’s presence next to her. “She’s in the art club” Nayeon continued, trying to get Chaeyoung’s attention but the baby cub just wouldn’t budge.
“Chaeyoung!” Nayeon pushed the kid lightly which got her attention, she noticed the raven-haired beauty in front of her and choked on the chocolate milk she was sipping on earlier, Mina immediately sprang to action and patted and rubbed her back in circles, attempting to get the girl to calm down and breathe properly but it wasn’t helping, it just made her all red and embarrassed.
“Before you ask why she’s Nayeon’s new child, it’s because she is literally a replica of the love of your life over here” Jeongyeon pointed to Nayeon who now in turn is red up to her ears all the way from her neck. Nayeon stomped on Jeongyeon’s toes without making it obvious to the others which failed after the short haired lesbian let out an ugly shriek.
“S-Son Ch-Chaeyoung. Nice to meet you, sorry about earlier” The blonde finally calmed down and extended her hand out to Mina and gave her a soft smile where her dimple poked out. Mina froze from her spot once she saw the cute smile from the smaller girl and Nayeon gulped heavily, she noticed how Mina looked at Chaeyoung and it scared her, it was new, it was different.
A game changer.
--
I just wanna be the one
But to you, we're already done
Tell me, why'd you have to hit and run me?
It was a cool summer night and Mina and Nayeon were prepping Mina up for a date which Nayeon really didn’t take well, these past few days she’s been sulky and distant from everyone – especially Mina, it was a surprise to the Japanese girl that Nayeon would help her get ready.
The doorbell rang when the clock just struck 7pm and Mina was beginning to panic, grabbing her bag and pulling down her black dress. Chaeyoung asked her out on a date last week and she only gained the courage to tell her other friends a few days ago, she doesn’t know where their going or what time she’s coming home so she told her parents that she’s sleeping over at Nayeon’s. Mina had a black dress on with a plain white t-shirt underneath and converse sneakers, her hair parted to the side with a clip. Nayeon looked over at her bestfriend, eyes full of jealousy and sadness, she can’t believe she’s losing her to someone younger than them – wait no that’s not the important one, she can’t believe she’s losing her to someone who’s a carbon copy of her but had the courage she never had. Nayeon’s heart has been hurting and throbbing even more lately ever since Chaeyoung asked Nayeon’s blessing to let her take Mina out on a date since Chaeyoung is an old soul and thinks that blessings even from the bestfriend is needed.
“W- wow… you look…” Chaeyoung stared at Mina with her mouth agape. She was in a simple hoodie, jeans and sneakers outfit but she still looked pretty nice, Mina clearly was blushing and it made Nayeon feel worse, she remembers when she used to be the reason why Mina was blushing but now she’s been replaced.
“You don’t look bad yourself” Mina replied to the shorter girl and gave her a quick hug. “Bold” Nayeon thought to herself while she was standing on the last stair, holding onto the railing, she’s never really seen Mina be this bold with anyone other than her, the Japanese girl doesn’t even really hug Jihyo, Jeongyeon, Momo, Sana, Dahyun or Tzuyu.
A game changer.
Later that night, Chaeyoung drops Mina back off at Nayeon’s at 11 pm. The taller girl full of happiness, all giddy with a wide smile on her face. It made Nayeon feel a lot more worse but she knows that the other girl needs to talk about her date and it just made her feel sick.
“So… How was the—”
“I just had the best date ever! Chaeyoung took me to the carnival by the beach in the city and we played games, I won a lot of teddies and she gave me hers as well! We ate a lot of food too, we talked, she even paid for me Nayeonnie! I didn’t spend a single cent today! She’s been so nice to me these past few weeks and she’s been courting me for a while already and she’s a great girl. Then when the night was about to end she took me on the ferris wheel and she asked me to be her girlfriend and I said yes! Then we kissed and we—Nayeon? You okay?” The Japanese girl stopped rambling all of a sudden and it broke Nayeon out of her trance. Ever since Mina entered her room, she was already wearing the hoodie Chaeyoung had on earlier and she had a new silver necklace that had a key pendant on it, Nayeon couldn’t stop staring. It only made her feel even more suffocated, even more in pain. A single tear fell out of Nayeon’s left eye but she immediately brushed it away and assured her bestfriend that she was okay until she got Mina to ramble again about how she feels about Chaeyoung and how their first official date way.
Nayeon was never gonna admit to the younger girl that she actually went to where the carnival was but she honestly was just taking Kookue out for a walk which honestly is dangerous because she does it by herself and she’s walking by the beach with a small pomerian dog, but it was alright since her guard/butler/personal assistant that she sees as an older brother was always around but a bit of distance away just so she can have some alone time. She was sitting on the stone edge, Kookeu next to her, they both enjoyed just watching the ocean waves crash into each other but lately it’s been reminding Nayeon about how deep she feels about Mina and how she can’t have her now. She didn’t mean to see the two kissing and Chaeyoung securing the necklace around Mina’s, Nayeon’s heart immediately stopped functioning and she did the best thing she could do at that moment. She cried. She cried until she walked back to the car and ordered to go straight home.
--
Now I'm all alone, cryin' ugly
You broke my heart just for fun
It’s already been 5 years and Chaeyoung and Mina has been stronger than ever. It was Mina’s 18th birthday and the whole gang was so excited to celebrate the girl’s birthday, Mina requested her parents to not throw her a party but have her friend’s over which was her equivalent of a party. The birthday girl was gifted with many things by her family and friends, she was basically spoilt the whole day with everyone around her – everyone but the one person she wanted to see the most.
Nayeon couldn’t deal with Mina’s birthday today for some reason, she fought with her body to stay but she couldn’t. The only thing she knew was that she packed a bag, got in her car and went to the family estate in the hills where they barely went anymore since they were all busy, but Nayeon was extremely thankful once she got there and the house was all clean since her family hires someone to clean it once a week to make sure no animal or person broke in and made a home out of it.
Nayeon felt bad that she missed her bestfriend’s 18th birthday, it was a big event in her bestfriend’s life and she was missing it because she couldn’t take it anymore. She can’t take how in love Chaeyoung and Mina are, it’s been years and nothing has happened to break them up – don’t get Nayeon wrong, she supports them but a giant part of her wishes she had the courage back then to confess to the Japanese and let her know her true feelings for her.
Nayeon doesn’t know what to think, what to feel, how to deal with things anymore. Over the years she’s been losing her smile and happiness, something that used to happen because of a certain girl but now she has to fake it all to seem alright. Nayeon took a few bottles of soju from the cupboard and drank it all straight from the brim, she wanted to feel numb, she wanted to forget, she wanted to at least feel okay and carefree even if it was just for a few hours.
Mina opened the front door of the homey vacation house the Myoui family had where she was celebrating her 18th birthday with her friends, she looked up and saw Jennie and Jisoo with a very drunk Nayeon on their shoulders, the car parked in the driveway also had Rose and Lisa in it, all looking tired and dead.
“Hey. Sorry to interrupt your birthday celebration but we found Nayeon in their family rest house all drunk and the place reeked of alcohol, we couldn’t bring her back to her house or ours otherwise she’ll be in a lot of trouble. She told us earlier that you were spending your birthday here with your friends so we thought this was the next best place to bring her” Jennie was explaining while they brought Nayeon to one of the free guest rooms.
“Oh” Was all that came out of Mina’s mouth after the explanation. The two girls bid their goodbyes and drove off the property, the room was all quiet except for Mina and Nayeon’s breathing and Nayeon’s occasional drunken sleep talk.
Mina walked over to Nayeon and the stench of alcohol hit her nose like a truck, she scrunched her nose and immediately took a new set of pyjamas for the older girl and changed her, she then took a facial wipe and took off the messy make up on her face, maskara leaked under her eyes, lipstick a bit smudged. In all honesty from Mina, Nayeon looked like a mess.
“No. Stop.” Nayeon mumbled, swatting Mina’s hands away from her face
“Nayeon stop. I’m trying to clean your face”
“No. Stop. I want to be a messsss, it’s been a while since I got to let go of how I feel”
“How you feel?”
“For you”
Mina was taken back by Nayeon’s words but then she remembered that the girl is still drunk.
“Nayeon you don’t know what you’re talking about. Just sleep”
“Mina, I’m not that drunk.” Nayeon took a hold of Mina’s wrists “I may have drunk a lot but I know how to control myself around you. I mean I’ve had 5 years of experience, has it been 5 years? Right?”
Mina gulped, she didn’t know where Nayeon was coming from. One second Nayeon was passed out and drunk as hell on the bed, the next she’s talking like she’s sober.
“You know I’m tired. All these years I’ve been pretending that I’m fine but I really am not. It hurts. You keep hurting me, especially when you’re with her.” Nayeon continued, her grip loosening a bit.
“With who? Chaeyoung?”
Nayeon looked away immediately and she doesn’t believe that now is the time that her body is betraying her and is sobering up. Seriously, her body needs to control herself, she’s sure this isn’t how it’s supposed to happen.
“Of course, has it not been obvious? I mean it would make sense, I am a great actress, you don’t even know how hard I fell for you, how deep I am in love with you.” Nayeon turned around and laid flat on her stomach, hiding her face away from her bestfriend, from her love.
“Nayeon…”
“No. No. It’s alright, I understand. You love her, not me. It’s not my fault anyways and it’s not yours. Thanks for letting me crash Mina” Nayeon took a deep breath in and finally let it go after a good minute when Mina left the room. Physically she was choking but it doesn’t even compare to how suffocated she has been for the past 5 years.
The next day, it was awkward between the two bestfriends and everyone could sense it but they didn’t bother commenting on it since they were still celebrating Mina’s birthday and Nayeon still had a hangover until the end of the day which told them enough.
--
Another story that's sad and true
I can feel the pain, can you?
You had to be the one to let me down
To colour me blue
Hate to see you with someone new
I’ll put a curse on her and you
Ain’t no looking back, now you're dead and gone
My love is gone too
More years passed and the friend group is still intact, even though they were all in their mid-twenties nearing their thirties. Nayeon and Jihyo were finally lawyers, Mina and Tzuyu became surgeons, Jeongyeon was a detective, Momo was a dance teacher, Dahyun being an architect and Sana being an engineer, Chaeyoung having a record deal that showcased her rapping, vocals and dancing. The whole gang had their own jobs and lives but it didn’t stop them from hanging out and talking to each other.
Dahyun and Sana finally got together, Tzuyu and Jihyo are also dating which surprised everyone because they really didn’t expect them to get together. Out of all nine of them, only Nayeon, Jeongyeon and Momo were the only single ones even though Momo is beginning to see some dude named… Heechul? Who knows, Nayeon could barely remember other people’s names since she’s always studying a case and having to remember millions of tiny details.
Chaeyoung gathered the seven girls in a café while Mina had a shift in the hospital, the small cub specifically asked all of them to take a day off work to help her with something so they immediately signed for a sick leave since they thought it was something serious because the girl never calls for a meeting unless it’s super important.
“What’s wrong Chaengie?” Jihyo asked, everyone had a coffee in their hands and they looked worriedly at the young girly, Chaeyoung was slightly shaking, her leg jumping up and down, her face etched with worry and her having to constantly wipe her hands on the side of her jeans since she was sweating too much.
“Unnie… we’ve known each other for over ten years now and I am so grateful that I know all of you and that you all have been supporting Mina and I for all these years” Chaeyoung began but her last sentence got all the girls in a ramble.
“You’re going to break up with Mina?!”
“SON CHAEYOUNG!”
“What are you talking about?!”
“What did you do?!”
A series of questions were yelled by the girls, them about to pour their coffee on Chaeyoung but a worker came to them and asked them to calm down so they all did. They sat back down on their respected seats but a furious frown was on each of their faces – well each one of them except for Nayeon who kept a blank face.
Chaeyoung pulled out a small red box from her pocket, opened it up and faced it towards the older girls and Tzuyu. They all were in shock and took it differently, Momo’s coffee spilled out of her mouth, Tzuyu caught Jihyo who was about to fall off her chair, Jeongyeon held back Sana who literally fell off her chair, Dahyun dropped her cake back on the saucer it was on and Nayeon accidentally did a spit-take with her coffee which caught the attention of everyone in the building.
“I’m going to propose to Mina”
It’s been a good week and everything has been planned out, everyone is excited and giddy. Mama and Papa Myoui has been invited, all the girl’s families were in a room watching the surprise about to happen, the girls were all spread out around the area so that they can film the whole thing and surprise Mina with fireworks and hugs when she says yes.
Chaeyoung has booked the whole aquarium for the night because she knows her girlfriend too well, she loves the water and animals and she loves quiet places where there aren’t too many people. The ring has been hiding in Tzuyu and Jihyo’s apartment, Mina’s parents have been staying at Nayeon’s place, Sana arranged the flowers, Dahyun got the fireworks, Momo has the food all nice and ready and Jeongyeon got all the police clearance for the fireworks.
The whole speech was blurred up for Nayeon, she hid behind the area for stingrays, she has a giant fear of water and it consumes her but she began liking the water when she found out her bestfriend loves it. ‘Whatever Mina likes and loves, I like and love too’ was what Nayeon used to say to her parents when she was younger.
Chaeyoung finally bended down on one knee with the box in her hand, Mina had a tear threatening to fall and Nayeon’s were already streaming down her face. The breeze of the open balcony of the aquarium hit Mina and made her look heaven sent which made Nayeon’s heart yearn more for her but she had to silence those voices, she knew she would never have Mina. It was too late.
Mina nodded her head and said yes, Dahyun pressed a button and fireworks erupted in the background by the beach, it honestly looked like an awesome proposal. Nayeon wondered how she would’ve proposed if she was dating Mina right now. Mina tugged Chaeyoung up once the ring perfectly slid into her finger, it was a simple gold band with diamonds decorating in the middle, it wasn’t too flashy, it was perfect for Mina. Mina pulled Chaeyoung by her blazer and tugged her into a kiss. Everyone emerged from their places and the parents came out of the room, running towards the couple congratulating them on their new upcoming wedding.
Another tear fell out of Nayeon’s eye and she silently made her way down to the beach, not even bothering to tell anyone, she didn’t even think anyone was going to notice her absence since they are too busy talking about the upcoming wedding, how they pulled this proposal off, and all that crap Nayeon didn’t want to talk about right now. All Nayeon wanted right now was Mina but she knew she couldn’t have her.
Nayeon sat on the stone edge where she normally would be with Kookeu but sadly she was alone tonight, she heard footsteps from behind her and immediately took a hold of her keys in her pocket in case anything happened but she heard the familiar voice from behind her.
“Penny for your thoughts?”
“Mina…” Nayeon whispered to the air
“Nayeon” Mina sat next to Nayeon, laying her head on the older girl’s shoulder.
“I’m sorry. You should be in there celebrating your engagement, it’s not everyday you get engaged to someone you’ve been dating for a long time”
“You’re my bestfriend and you’re more important than a party”
Nayeon played with Mina’s fingers and stared at the ring on her left hand, Nayeon specifically remembers the memory from a long time ago how she promised Mina with a ring pop that they’ll get married in the future.
“A perfect ring for a perfect girl”
“Nayeon…”
“I love you Mina” Nayeon whispered and took Mina’s hand in hers
“I love you too Nayeon”
‘…But not like how I love you’
--
All my love is gone and the hate has grown
Standing all alone and I'm searching for something
This don't feel like home
How am I supposed to live without you?
The wedding finally took place a year after and it still is a dreading day for Nayeon, she brought a date with her but the thought of Mina still lingers in her mind, she doesn’t think it’s fair for Rose but then again… life hasn’t exactly been fair on her too.
The whole ceremony breezed by for Nayeon, she basically numbed down and ignored every word coming from the officiant, all the words from the vows and the questions coming from her date are all shut down quickly by short and cold replies, she doesn’t mean to be rude and she begged Rose to come with her to this wedding so she doesn’t feel as lonely but this wedding day itself made her feel a million times worse.
“You may now kiss the bride” The officiator announces in front of them and Nayeon regrets not standing up and stopping the wedding earlier when the officiator asked if anyone didn’t want this marriage to happen because she really didn’t but then that meant that she didn’t want Mina happy and in her life all she wants is Mina happy… even if it’s not with her.
The couple kissed and Nayeon wishes it was her in Chaeyoung’s spot, she wishes it was her who just got married to Mina, she wishes it was her who owned her heart… but she wasn’t the one in Chaeyoung’s spot, she wasn’t the one who just got married to Mina, and she isn’t the owner of Mina’s heart. She was just her bestfriend.
Mina and Chaeyoung broke the kiss and waved to their family and friends who were cheering and howling for them, Nayeon continued staring at her bestfriend and she felt tears streaming down her face, for others this may have come off as tears of happiness for her bestfriend but only Nayeon and Mina truly knew what these tears meant. Mina looked over at Nayeon and noticed her bestfriend crying and she felt guilty for being the reason why she was sad, it’s been years since Nayeon’s confession but Mina still can’t get that image of her drunk best friend crying in front of her confessing her love and hearing Nayeon’s muffled wails and cries from that room the whole night. Mina stayed outside Nayeon’s room crying, sitting on the floor until she heard Nayeon stop crying and assumed that she fell asleep, she entered the now silent room filled with Nayeon’s quiet snores and brushed the hair out of the girl’s face.
If only Nayeon confessed earlier.
Took my love and just left me numb.