Chapter Text
“Armin.”
My head goes blank for a second.
I have never heard her say my name in years. I want to hear it again. I want her to say my name one more time.
I can see the confusion on her face. She is not expecting to see me here. But god did I miss her so much.
Somewhere in the back of my mind I knew I wanted to go home and see her again. But that place has too many memories that I don’t want to think about. I have sealed them away in little treasure chest and threw away the key. Neat and tidy. That’s how I deal—dealt—with my grief.
Annie heaves up a sigh and for a second, I think she gives me a small smile. I blink and it’s gone. And then she looks away.
Okay. I am not the only one feeling a little uncomfortable. That’s a good sign, isn’t it?
Annie looks at me again, expecting me to answer. I have rehearsed this a thousand times in my head—what I will say to her, what I will do.
Now I am realizing that coming here is a mistake.
“It’s been a while,” Annie says.
“How are you?” I ask in response. What a stupid thing to ask.
“I’m… fine. You?”
I open my mouth, then close it again. I want to tell her so many things, but I don’t where to start. Should I tell her, “I am terribly sorry for not keeping in touch when I moved away?”
I didn’t know if I could handle talking to her after everything that happened. I wish I called her once. It’s not like I didn’t try. In fact, I kept her number all these years, just in case.
But I didn’t have the guts to face her until today.
I am sorry for not being there for you when you needed me the most.
I know you understand why I left. That’s what I keep telling myself anyway.