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Pizza was a resounding success. Which Larry could have predicted because most everyone likes pizza. Especially young pharaohs who seemed to have an appetite for anything and everything new. Larry had to keep Ahk from eating an entire large by himself, secretly envying him of his youthful ability to do so.
Instead, he had the excited Ahk help him pass out the slices to anyone who was interested. The Hall of Dioramas was particularly happy.
“This is amazing, Gigantor! This here slice of pie will feed the whole company and then some!”
“Indeed, Larry. This is a godly proportion of food and my troops thank you for your generosity.”
Ahk and Larry watched in joint fascination as the miniature groups descended on the pizza and hauled their respective slices to their base camps. Larry then waited out of range as Ahk opened the Mayan exhibit, presented a slice, and closed it again without even a single barb hurled at his form.
After finally serving themselves, Larry and Ahk sat down in the entrance rotunda and watched Rexy chase his own bony tail.
“Did you see Jed and Octavius’ people going after that pizza? It was kind of creepy.”
“It was quite disturbing. Almost like a colony of ants overtaking and devouring a helpless animal until all that remained was the desolate heap of desiccated bones.”
Larry stared, his own pizza frozen midair inches from his mouth.
Ahk shrugged innocently. “What?”
Larry shook his head and set the slice down. “Nothing. How about I grab you something to drink? Anything you want.”
“What is the traditional drink to accompany pizza?”
“Anything you want, really. It’s super casual, to be honest. People drink water, beer, soda? It’s kind of up to—“
“Beer!” Ahk’s face lit up. “I haven’t had beer in ages.” Larry smiled, his own curiosity flaring up.
“You drink beer?”
Ahk looked at him as if that was the stupidest question ever asked.
“Everyone drinks beer, Larry. Can we please get some? There were many long, dusty nights I dreamt of heket.”
Larry shuffled a bit, trying to figure out how to break the truth gently. “I can’t. I’m on the clock, which means alcohol is totally off limits. It’s different now, Ahk. Water’s safe. There are a lot of other options you can choose from. Some people don’t drink beer at all.”
Ahk’s face dropped. “Perhaps if you let me get some for myself? I’m a king, I’m not helpless, I’m sure I could manage it.”
“I’m sorry Ahk, even if you spent another thousand years in your sarcophagus, they’d still card you. You need an ID to prove you’re old enough to drink alcohol.”
“Larry, I am thousands of years old. I think I’m old enough to drink alcohol.”
“It’s your ridiculous baby face. They’ll never believe you.” Larry tried to pinch one of Ahk’s cheeks like a grandmother, but the king swatted it away. Larry stifled his smile when a petulant pout crossed Ahk’s face.
“Aww, c’mon buddy. What’s the problem?”
Ahk huffed and crossed his arms. “What’s the point of being ruler of all the land if you can’t get what you want?”
“Ahk.” Larry looked at Ahk knowingly, Ahk sighed.
“You’ve been so kind…” Ahk paused and uncrossed his arms before almost shyly continued. “I wanted to share something of my world with you. Beer sounded like the perfect opportunity.”
Larry let that sink in before letting a crooked smile show on his face. “You can share anything you want with me Ahk. Just tell me. Just wait here, I’m gonna go get us some soda to drink, and when I get back you can tell me just what was so great about Ancient Egyptian beer.”
Ahk’s face brightened. “Just one question: what is soda?”
Larry laughed. “Dude, you are gonna love it.”
As Larry walked to the vending machines, he couldn’t help but get excited at the prospect of listening to Ahk extol the virtues of beer.