Chapter Text
"The virus spread a lot faster than we had at first anticipated. We’ve been confronted with the Croatoan virus before – somehow we beat it – but with an infection on this grand of a scale there is only so much two people can do. Last outbreak was in a small, sleepy town and we saw how quickly it moved through the inhabitants there, but to see how swiftly this infection can move when it spreads in a closely populated area is beyond terrifying, yet somewhat intriguing.
We still aren’t sure from where the spread of the virus was – considering Dean and I didn’t catch news of this until it was already out of control – and it doesn’t seem like we’ll be able to track it down either. What we first thought was a singular case of Croatoan spread turned out to be a nationwide disaster. Dean keeps talking about old Romero flicks, I wonder if he thinks this is a joke or simply trying to make the best out of a beyond shitty situation-“
“Are you really going to write a fucking diary about this Sammy? Come on, thought you had better things to use your precious time on,” Dean snorts, leaning against the windowsill as he observes his younger brother.
Sam let his pen drop to the table with an exasperated sigh, long fingers running through his matted hair before he turned his attention to his brother, elbows resting on the back of his chair. “What else would you have me do? We are basically trapped in this room until the infected clear out of the parking lot. Besides,” he mutters, reaching once more for the pen. “We should document this – just in case someone makes it through this. We don’t know long this will last; they aren’t exactly immortal. They’re just… Enraged.”
“So it’s 28 Days Later we’re dealing with instead. Great. Just great. That doesn’t make it better Sam.”
He sighed from exhaustion, reaching up to pinch the bridge of his nose as Dean started to roam around in the apartment. His brother was restless; had been ever since this whole ordeal started. This hadn’t been how Dean had expected to spend his last year. Heck, his brother had probably expected to just bury himself in dead monsters and willing girls and wait for his hourglass to run out of sand. Instead he was stuck here; in a crummy hotel room with the little brother who he sold his soul to save from death and with a horde of infected citizens roaming the streets surrounding them.
It had only been a few days before this infection had spread that Sam had become aware of Dean’s deal to save his life back at Cold Oak. Blows had been exchanged – Sam was fairly confident he’d nearly broken his brother’s nose – and bottles had been emptied. If you asked Dean he’d say they were back to normal. Sam, on the other hand, saw it differently. Guilt and anger was gnawing at him constantly. He remembered how Dean had felt when he found out what John had done to save him; he knew the guilt that had burdened his brother and how it had damn near drove him to the brink of madness. And yet, even though Dean knew the guilt of knowing someone else sacrificed their soul to save your life, he still didn’t hesitate to throw his own life away to save his little brother.
As heroic and touching the deed might seem to others Sam was all but fuming with rage that his brother would do such a thing. Dean knew what hardship he had gone through after Jessica, how ready he’d been to throw the towel in the ring if it hadn’t been for the burning need to avenge Yellow Eyes’ victims, and yet Dean didn’t hesitate to throw his own life away to save him.
But the worst thing was how unwilling Dean was to talk about it. His brother constantly brushed it off, hiding the fear that Sam knew he felt by a tough façade and bad jokes, spending as much time away from his little brother as possible fucking, drinking and eating as much calorie-packed food he could find. Dean had turned into a machine; he fucked, he killed, he ate and got shitfaced– there was room for little else. Sam had humored him in the beginning – had let Dean bring girls back to their motel room, dutifully sitting in the Impala while his older brother defiled their shared room with the conquest(s) of the night, and even eaten more cheeseburgers alongside his brother than he’d like to admit just to see Dean smile. But he could only put up with so much, especially when it became crystal clear to him that Dean wasn’t too keen on Sam’s attempts on actually getting him out of this hellish deal. Sam sighed, casting one last glimpse at his brother before he went back to writing; the scribbling of his pen accompanied by Dean’s pacing footsteps.
“We’ve managed to get in contact with Bobby – the phone lines aren’t completely dead yet, although finding a connection is getting increasingly more difficult. He’s safe back in Sioux Falls, at least for the time being, so Dean and I are going to attempt making our way back there. Getting out of the city might become a problem though. The streets are getting increasingly more swarmed with the infected and the bodies they leave behind. I fear that if we don’t get on the move soon Dean and I will have to leave the city on foot – something Dean isn’t too keen on. At least the Impala is safely stored away in the hotel’s garage; otherwise I’m certain Dean would have thrown the remainder of his life away trying to save that car.
I have yet to discuss the plan with Dean, but I think our best shot is travelling out of the city via rooftops – if possible. We’d stay clear of the infected on the streets – who we still aren’t sure how to avoid when walking amongst them (Dean’s theory of covering yourself in intestines didn’t work out) – and get a good overview on how grave the situation actually is. There is a gun store a few blocks away from our current location, so if the guns and weapons we currently have in the room aren’t enough we know where we can possibly go to stock up. Dean is still not keen on leaving – I think he’s waiting on an opportunity to get Baby out of the garage – but I fear that there will be no such opportunity. The infected are only growing in numbers, and there is still no cure for the virus as of this date. I hope Bobby has found a lead for us when we join up with him – or if we manage to join up with him.
There are four months and seven days till Dean’s deal runs out.
- Sam Winchester.”