Chapter Text
Eddie glanced at his watch again, checking the time. He had been told that the session started at 7 PM sharp, so of course, he had arrived fifteen minutes early. Eddie had grabbed a cup of lukewarm coffee from the self-serve table at the back of the room, deciding to ignore the slightly stale donuts, even though his stomach was grumbling at the sight of them. He selected a chair close to the exit, so he could fantasize about leaving the session whenever he wanted to, although he had a court order that required him to attend twelve full sessions.
At least Eddie had been able to choose where he took his therapy sessions, and was able to select a local veterans group therapy rather than attending one on one sessions with someone who didn’t understand where he was coming from. But as he sat there awkwardly on a folding chair that had been placed in a circle and avoided looking at the other attendees, he wondered if he had made the right choice. The therapist was ten minutes late at that point, and Eddie was wondering if he had to stay the whole time even if the therapist never showed.
As Eddie sat there dreaming of all the other things he would rather be doing instead of therapy, like watching a movie with Christopher, or enjoying a cold beer while relaxing on his couch, he could hear the thump of something heavy landing on the ground along with rushed footsteps outside the room. He tensed slightly, why, he wasn’t really sure. But then a tall, blond-haired man entered the room, nodding to the other attendees as he limped across the room muttering apologies under his breath. A messenger bag hung over his shoulder, bumping awkwardly into the crutch he had in his left hand, and he briefly paused to untangle it before sitting down into a chair directly across from Eddie.
His eyes met Eddie’s. Eddie could see pain flash briefly across his face and then recognized the shift in his body to push it down, to hide it from the rest of the attendees. He knew what that looked like, having done it for so long since Shannon had passed that he instantly felt a connection to the man across from him, regardless that it was the first time he had ever seen him before.
“My apologies for the delay in starting,” the man apologized, looking around at the other members of the group. He nodded to the one older woman, who had pulled over an extra chair so that he could prop his leg up. “I see we have a few new members in our group tonight, please give a little wave if you are new,” the man asked, tilting his head in Eddie’s direction.
Eddie waved reluctantly, feeling like he had been placed back into elementary school with his son but relaxed slightly when he saw a couple other people copy his actions. He glanced back down at his hands, not wanting to draw any further attention if he could avoid it.
“For those of you who are new, my name is Buck, and I will be leading this session this evening. I encourage all of you who are here to share your troubles or your causes of celebration as we go through our evening,” Buck said, smiling at each of the participants in the room and then led them into the main topic of the evening, which was about the importance of communication with family and friends.
By the end of the night, Eddie was drained, both emotionally and physically. He wasn’t able to get up the nerve to say anything, but he had listened carefully to the stories that were being shared around the circle. It was easy to see the sense of community in the group, which was common whenever a group of veterans came together. Eddie was very impressed with the ability of several of the members to share their emotions, something he found all too difficult….and which had led him to punching a man over a handicapped parking spot.
Shaking his head, Eddie stood up, and headed towards the door. Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed the therapist, Buck, seemed to be having a bit of difficulty manoeuvring his crutch and messenger bag and Eddie slowed down his pace. Eddie hung back for a moment, understanding the need to try to do things without asking for help, but when Buck finally dropped his crutch, Eddie swooped in to pick it up.
“Here you go, man,” Eddie said, holding the crutch out to Buck so that he could slide it under his arm easier. He blushed slightly at the grin that Buck shot him, as a brief thought of ‘this man’s gorgeous’ shot across his mind.
“Thank you,” Buck said, straightening up his position now that he wasn’t so off-balance. “I actually meant to ask you to stay behind for a few minutes, but I really need to get back to my place to rest this stupid leg,” the man said, tilting his head in the direction of his left leg.
Eddie nodded, assessing Buck’s leg without really thinking about it, second nature as a result of his career choices. He was curious about the injury, but knew it would be rude to ask. “Well, you have my number right? How about we snag a better cup of coffee before our next session?” Eddie said, waving his empty cup from earlier.
At Buck’s nod and agreement, Eddie headed on out, only realizing once he climbed in his truck that it sounded like he had asked his therapist out on a date. Groaning as he leaned his forehead against the steering wheel, he figured he would wait to straighten everything out at their coffee meeting, rather than embarrass Buck any further by mentioning it again at his workplace.
XXXXX
Eddie had managed to stake out a table in the back corner of the busy coffee shop and took the chair that allowed him to see the entrance so that he could see Buck when he arrived. He was concerned that he might have already crossed the line by asking Buck for coffee but was relieved when he received a text the next day to schedule. He shifted awkwardly in his seat, blatantly ignoring some of the side looks he was getting from the staff for taking up a table without ordering anything.
Similar to the therapy session, Buck was about five minutes late showing up. Eddie noticed that he was without a crutch this time, but instead had an ankle brace wrapped around his left foot and was still limping slightly. Once Buck spotted him, Eddie stood up and left his jacket on the chair, hoping that no one would steal their table as he joined Buck in the line. Buck ordered a caramel macchiato, which was not something that Eddie would have ordered for him, so he was glad he waited. He ended up ordering his standard dark roast and decided to try it with oat milk for a change.
“Are you lactose intolerant?” Buck asked him, noticing that he had asked for oat milk.
“Nope,” Eddie said, stepping in front of Buck as the taller man attempted to pay for their coffees, waving off Buck’s protests and handing the barista his credit card instead. “Hen, one of my co-workers has been going on about how much she’s liking oat milk in her coffee, so I thought I’d give it a try.”
The two sat down at the table, Eddie relieved that no one had stolen their seats. He took a tentative sip, noticing that Buck was watching him closely on his reaction. “Doesn’t taste much different than normal milk,” Eddie concluded, shrugging slightly.
“Maddie, my sister has been on an alternative milk binge lately, I’ve been having to bring my own cream when I go over to her place,” Buck said with a grin.
Eddie snapped his fingers, the name Maddie sounding familiar. “By any chance, is she dating a firefighter?” Eddie asked, wondering what the odds of Chimney’s girlfriend being Buck’s sister were.
“Yeah, Chimney,” Buck said, sounding surprised. “Wait, no, does he work with you? What are the odds?” he added, chuckling.
Eddie nodded, laughing along with Buck. The two of them exchanged some further pleasantries, including Eddie sharing a funny story about how Chimney got his nickname. As the clock ticked closer to the next hour and their drinks got low, he noticed Buck shift, looking a bit uncomfortable and realized that he was about to bring up the original purpose of their meeting.
“What do you think about heading out of here and going to the park across the street to discuss what we need to talk about? It’s rather busy here,” Eddie suggested, having glanced around the coffee shop, and realized how many ears could overhear details that he’d rather not share.
“Yeah, sure,” Buck readily agreed, following Eddie out of the shop after disposing of his cup. They sat down on the nearest bench, and after an awkward pause, Buck started to talk. “So this is super awkward, but it’s a requirement of your court order that you ‘actively’ participate in our therapy sessions,” he explained, using finger quotes to emphasize the active part. “Now typically, the court also likes to have some sort of report from the therapist as well to confirm that you are participating.”
Eddie couldn’t help but flinch at this comment. The idea of sharing to the group was hard enough to deal with, the idea of a stranger reading his story was devastating to say the least.
Buck quickly shook his head, placing his hand on Eddie’s knee in reassurance. “Sorry, I shouldn’t have just sprung that on you. Some therapists follow court orders to the letter, I don’t,” Buck explained, trying to calm down Eddie. “I will give them very vague reports, like, today, Eddie talked about his family to the group, and that is all I will send. Whatever you choose to share will stay between myself and the group.”
Eddie nodded, feeling slightly embarrassed at his knee jerk reaction. He wasn’t sure if his blush was due to that embarrassment, or the fact that Buck still had a comforting grip on his knee, which Buck seemed to realize, and quickly pulled back. Eddie felt a slight twinge of discomfort at the loss of contact, but shook it off.
“I think it took me a whole month to share my story with the group and I was so nervous that I think I threw up right before the session,” Buck reminisced, leaning back against the bench. Eddie looked at him in surprise, he thought it would have been easier for the man.
“I know that look,” Buck said with a grin, causing Eddie’s blush to deepen. “Well, I’ll have you know that I wasn’t always a therapist. I started off on a similar path as yours, but in the Navy.”
Eddie looked up and down at Buck, trying to visualize the man in uniform and realized it came easily. “Is that how you injured your leg?” Eddie blurted out, and then mentally smacked himself for asking something so personal.
But Buck just nodded, reaching down to grip his calf. “As you know, I can’t go into many details,” Buck said, exchanging a look with Eddie. “But yeah, there was a bomb which resulted in my leg being crushed under one of our vehicles...I was pretty lucky to keep my leg.” Buck explained, pausing in thought.
“No cool robot leg?” Eddie teased, trying to lighten the mood. He had noticed that it looked like Buck was lost in his memory, and he was sure that it wasn’t a good memory if he was thinking of his injury.
“No, no cool robot leg,” Buck replied with a grin, and then a laugh. “Well, Eddie, I have to get back for another client, but I will see you tomorrow night?” Buck said, standing up reluctantly.
Eddie nodded, feeling a bit better about sharing now that Buck had shared a bit of his story. He waved as Buck headed back to his office, trying to not think too hard about why being labelled as a client felt wrong.