Archive of Our Own

Posted on: 28th June 2021

Yeonjun smiled as he watched Beomgyu receive a bouquet of purple flowers. He felt his smile widen when the fan who gave him the bouquet pulled out a pastel purple Polaroid Camera and asked him to pose for a picture. Once the fan finished clicking the pictures, she moved forward and sat down in front of Yeonjun.

“Hello, what's your name?” he asked, readying his pen to sign whatever the fan presented to him.

“Jiyoung. Can I please click a Polaroid and have you sign it, Yeonjun-ssi?” the girl requested.

Yeonjun smiled as he posed for her and let her click a picture before signing it. He waved at her before turning his attention onto the next fan, chatting as the fans slowly stopped. Once the last fan left, the five of them got up to interact with the audience one last time before the event ended. Yeonjun watched as his other members interacted with their fans, occasionally adding his own thoughts.

When Beomgyu started speaking, Yeonjun found himself giving all his attention to the younger. A teasing grin took over Yeonjun as he stepped closer to Beomgyu and positioned himself on his left side, trying his best not to laugh as he kept staring at him with his head cocked to the side.

“Stop, hyung!” whined Beomgyu, when Yeonjun hadn't moved for a few minutes and pushed at him playfully.

Yeonjun chuckled as he moved back and leaned against the table. He sighed and watched Beomgyu continue talking to their fans, the purple bouquet still in his hand for some reason. Yeonjun let his thoughts wander as his eyes fell onto the flowers. Those flowers had pretty long stems. It would be easy to put one in Beomgyu's hair, plus his hair was longer this time which would make it even better. Purple really suited him. It highlighted his eyes, especially when he put in greyish-silver contacts. God, he looked so beautiful.

Yeonjun wondered which stylist had done god's work of making Beomgyu wear that purple-colored shirt. Maybe he should find out who did that and try to get them a raise. Yeonjun often wondered how someone so perfect like Beomgyu entered his life. He didn't even deserve it.

Yeonjun soon found his thought train stopping when his members started waving and saying goodbye. He quickly pushed his thoughts aside and joined them. Just as they were about to leave, a girl, the one from before, Jiyoung, suddenly appeared and smiled at him, a fond look on her face.

“Take this, Yeonjun-ssi. You should keep this. I can see it in your eyes.” she said as she offered a Polaroid to him.

Yeonjun frowned in confusion as he grabbed the Polaroid and bowed slightly to her before letting himself be pulled away from there and into the dressing room. He made quick work of changing his clothes before he remembered the Polaroid and picked it up from where it was laying. Yeonjun scrunched up his eyebrows when he saw the picture. It was clicked when he was teasing Beomgyu.

What did that girl mean by she could see it in his eyes- oh.

He could see it too. Hell, anyone could see it. Yeonjun let out a shuddered breath as he leaned against the wall and let himself slide down to the floor. Fuck, it was getting out of control again. A fan saw that! This was bad, god knows how many articles would pop up tomorrow about this!

Photos from Tomorrow By Together's latest fansign reveal that oldest member Choi Yeonjun is absolutely smitten and in love with younger member Choi Beomgyu. A photo sent in by a fan showed the older member staring at the younger with love-filled eyes. The crush he had been nurturing for years since they were trainees had turned into love without him even realizing it. Pity that he won't be receiving that love back anytime soon. Especially not with them being idols and having homophobic fans plus their company-

Yeonjun snapped out of his inner monologue when he heard a loud knock. Someone was banging on his door.

“Hyung! Come on, everyone's ready, let's go!”

Yeonjun cleared his throat as he shouted back, “Go to the car, Taehyun, I'll be there soon!”

The rapper let out a sigh once he hears footsteps retreat. He was in so much trouble. How could he have fallen in love with Beomgyu? With his infectious laugh? With his kind nature and handsomeness? With the person he was outside of his idol persona? With those beautiful eyes? With- oh god.

Seems like there wasn't enough chaos in Yeonjun's life while they promoted their new album Chaos Chapter: Freeze, because his life was just dropped into a bowl of extreme chaos while he was frozen, unable to do anything. Fuck his life.

**

It had been a week since Yeonjun had realized that he was hopelessly in love with Beomgyu, and unlike what he had expected, things were not going well. He had started actively avoiding Beomgyu. And that had been going well until he messed up.

It had been after they'd finished performing at M-Net and were backstage, changing when Beomgyu showed up out of literally nowhere.

“Hey, hyung! Do you wanna go and get some food after we're done here? The others are planning to stay in.”

Yeonjun had quite literally frozen when Beomgyu had popped up the sudden question and did what seemed like the perfect option at that time, it was the wrong move. He grabbed his stylist's hand and grinned at Beomgyu, slightly apologetically.

“I'm so sorry, Beomie, but noona has a date today and I have to drop her off. Let's go next time!”

Beomgyu smiled, clearly upset as he nodded, “It's okay, hyung, I'll see you later!”

Yeonjun hadn't slept a wink that night, his head going round and round on about how he had hurt Beomgyu by lying like that. Things just got worse after that.

**

The next time is at the dorm a week after the incident with the stylist. Their choreographer had let them leave early that day and all of them had chosen to catch up on things they weren't able to due to their schedule. Yeonjun had stayed in his room and spent his time on YouTube while laying in bed. Maybe he could catch up on sleep too with a power nap. Yeonjun froze when he heard footsteps near his door followed by a familiar voice calling out for him.

“Hyung! I wanted to ask you something-”

Yeonjun's eyes widened as he quickly closed YouTube and threw his phone to the side before grabbing his blanket and put it on himself. A few seconds after that the door to his room opened and Beomgyu stepped in. Yeonjun held his breath and kept his eyes shut as Beomgyu walked towards his bed and whispered his name a few times before turning and leaving. Yeonjun waited a minute after his door closed to open his eyes. He let out a relieved sigh when he checked that he was all alone. God, this was such a close call! Thankfully he managed it well.

Little did he know that he had done a shit job and pretending to be asleep. Beomgyu frowned as he went back to his room. He had gone to ask Yeonjun if he would've liked to join him in getting a coffee. He had gone in because he had heard a noise coming from his room, he was probably watching something on his phone. And so when he entered, he expected Yeonjun to be awake, instead what he found was him laying awfully tense with his eyes squeezed shut.

Beomgyu felt concerned and went near his bed to check if he was alright and called out to him a few times before leaving. Why was Yeonjun pretending to be asleep? And did he really expect Beomgyu to not realize? Not only Beomgyu but everyone in their dorm had each other's sleeping patterns memorized. And that was expected after having slept in the same room for years before debut. Beomgyu didn't know why but this hurt him and left his heart aching.

**

The next incident had been when shit hit the fan. It had been almost two weeks since Yeonjun had realized he loved Beomgyu and actively avoided Beomgyu as much as he could. He didn't know why he did that. Maybe because he was afraid that he might blurt out his confession the next time Beomgyu smiled brightly at him or ran a hand through his hair or giggled with that cute little giggle of his or- yeah, he was whipped and couldn't afford to lose Beomgyu because of his stupid feelings.

So when Yeonjun went in to use the bathroom and walked in on a stark naked Beomgyu showering, he did what seemed the best option at that moment. He screamed. Yes, loud enough for everyone to hear in the dorm, and ran out not forgetting to close the door behind him. He ran past Taehyun who looked scared to death and slammed the door to his room shut and laid down on his back, staring at the ceiling while he panted. Fuck his life.

He had barely managed to get his feelings for Beomgyu under control and now he saw him naked, not that he hadn't seen him naked before but that was different! It was before he realized his feelings for Beomgyu. Feelings changed how you saw things. Before he didn't think much before going into the bathroom while Beomgyu used it to do his business and leave without a fuss. But now? Now seeing him naked in the shower just made him think of how beautiful the younger was and how much he loved him. Yeonjun was fucked.

Apparently, things were much worse than Yeonjun had expected since Soobin had to step in. The next day Soobin had knocked on his door after they'd gotten back from practice. It had been quite late and nearly everyone had gone to sleep. Yeonjun himself was preparing to sleep not that he was going to be able to sleep with the number of thoughts running wild in his mind. It didn't hurt to try.

Yeonjun had been concerned when Soobin knocked and asked to talk. He sounded serious enough for Yeonjun to wonder what had happened for Soobin to get so serious. The younger was pretty easygoing and didn't really behave like this. Yeonjun nodded and followed him out to the balcony where they'd gotten a new swing. The two of them sat down and stared at the scenery in front of them for a few minutes until Soobin spoke.

“Hyung, I-I didn't want to do this but I need to ask you if you're okay? Is something going on with you? You've been acting kinda weird since a few weeks and I'm- we're all worried.”

Yeonjun froze for a second before letting out a fake laugh and tried to wave Soobin off,

“Oh, it's nothing Soobin-ah, don't worry. I'm fine-”

“Don't lie to me hyung. We both know something's bothering you. I know for a fact that you haven't been sleeping well.”

Yeonjun sighed as he leaned back into the swing and pulled his knees up while Soobin pushed them. He was conflicted. Should he tell Soobin the truth? Or should he just lie more until Soobin gave up? However, before he could make a decision, Soobin spoke again.

“Please don't hide from me, hyung. You know I'm here for you. You can tell me what's on your mind.”

That was the push he needed for Yeonjun to let out a deep breath and shook his head, “I don't know where to start from Soobin-ah.”

“Start with telling me what's on your mind right now, hyung. Forget everything else.”

“I-I love Beomgyu. I think I've loved him for a long time but I didn't realize it before. I realized it a while back and I don't know what to do.” said Yeonjun, his voice cracking at the end.

Soobin sighed as he wrapped an arm around Yeonjun, pulling the older into his chest as tears started soaking his shirt. Poor Yeonjun. Soobin had no idea that his hyung felt that way.

Of course, after years of being with him, he hadn't failed to notice the extra affection and fondness Yeonjun always sent towards Beomgyu but had waved it off as a crush that would probably go away in time. But when Yeonjun had started avoiding Beomgyu at any costs all of a sudden. He was worried and decided to talk.

Now that Yeonjun told him what was on his mind, he couldn't help but feel his heartache for the older. He knew how Yeonjun was. He was the kind to fall hard but never fast. Soobin sighed as he let Yeonjun cry his heart out and rubbed his back, whispering comforting words to him.

About half an hour passed before Yeonjun felt better and finally calmed down enough to talk.

“I-I'm so confused, Soobin-ah. I realized that I loved him at the fansign and since then I just can't get him out of my mind. I keep avoiding him because I'm scared I'll confess my feelings and he'll hate me forever.”

Soobin hummed as he hugged the older tight, “Don't worry, hyung. Everything will happen with time and things will get better.”

“I, god, you have no idea how hard it was to not kiss him right there and then during the fansign. I'm just tired.” sighed Yeonjun as Soobin smiled. His hyung was so so whipped and in love. If things did not work out, Soobing was definitely stepping in.

And maybe Yeonjun slept with Soobin that night with the younger holding him tight totally unaware of who had overheard their conversation. Yeonjun was in for a surprise.

**

It's been nearly a month since Yeonjun realized his feelings for Beomgyu and a few days since he had the conversation with Soobin and had cried his heart out to the younger. So far, things had been calm and okay. Yes, Yeonjun was still avoiding Beomgyu, slightly less than what he did before, but the talk with Soobin had certainly helped him to an extent. He was slowly getting a hold on his feelings and had felt confident enough to hold a conversation with Beomgyu for 5 whole minutes before he'd make a pathetic excuse and escape.

However, his sleeping problems still remained there and led him to overthink whatever he'd done in the whole day at night all alone in bed without a wink of sleep. And here he was walking out of his room at 3 in the morning to get a glass of water. Yeonjun leaned against the kitchen counter as he gulped down the cold water, sighing at the feeling of it down his throat before refilling the bottle and placing it back into the fridge. They had a strict policy in their dorm of filling the bottle after you drank from it no matter how much you drank.

Yeonjun turned to leave, gasping and stumbling back when he suddenly bumped into Beomgyu, standing in front of him with his messy bed hair and cute pajamas.

“Hyung. Why are you up so late?”

Yeonjun shrugged as he tried to calm his heart, “Oh, nothing. I just couldn't sleep. Don't worry. Why are you up?”

Beomgyu shook his head as he moved to open the fridge and grabbed a bottle, “Nothing. I just wanted some water.”

Yeonjun hummed and moved to leave, not wanting to extend the conversation any more than necessary when he was stopped. He turned around to see that Beomgyu had caught his hand. Before Yeonjun could say anything Beomgyu pulled the older towards himself and stared right into his eyes. Yeonjun felt his heartbeat fasten as he gulped and waited for Beomgyu to speak.

“Hyung,” he whispered. “Be truthful and tell me. Do you still wanna kiss me?”

Yeonjun froze, eyes widening as he sucked in a sharp breath, “Wh-What do you mean, Beomie? I-I don't know what you're talking about-”

“Hyung, don't lie to me. I heard everything that night. What you said to Soobinnie hyung. I know.” sighed Beomgyu as he moved Yeonjun against the counter and trapped him between his hands. “Answer my question please hyung.”

Yeonjun gulped as he shook his head, “I- we can't Beomie. Our fans and the company and-”

“This is our life and we make the rules, hyung. No one else. So stop making excuses and answer my question.”

Yeonjun sighed and leaned forward, stopping an inch away from Beomgyu, “I still want to kiss you, Beomie.”

Beomgyu smiled as he moved and closed the distance between their lips, letting his body relax as he tried to convey his feeling through the kiss.

“Oh for fucks sake! Just because you two finally sorted out your shit, you don't get the right to fucking make out in the kitchen!”

The two broke apart with a start when they saw Kai standing at the entrance with a disgusted look on his face. Yeonjun and Beomgyu shared a look before bursting out into laughter and moved to leave the kitchen, wordlessly moving towards Yeonjun's room.

Right now, all they were going to do was make out and sleep in each other's arms. The other things could be dealt with in the morning. They knew that they'd overcome any problem that'd come at them because they had each other and it was all they needed.