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“Very well done Bell. I didn’t expect this training session to be so fruitful, but your progress is astounding as usual.” Ryuu wasn’t not proud of her short-term student, and yet she hesitated on getting up to face the newly-crowned victor. They could still train together of course and Ryuu has a treasure trove of dungeon experience the young boy still needs to absorb, but it would be training as equals, and Bell could critique her admittingly dated strategies. That’s a good thing, especially since she thought her role as a mentor would last forever. Not that she'd be opposed to that, but perhaps that's the issue in the first place.
Resigning herself to her discomfort, Ryuu stands and makes sure to look Bell in the eye when giving her congratulations. But something stops her. Whether it’s the deep bags under his eyes that don’t exist in reality, or posture that screams uncomfortable with hunched over shoulders slouching like he’s finished a week of labor, or how he doesn’t express any of the emotion she had come to love him for. Simply a blank face, with eyebrows raised slightly to show he had not in fact died standing and he understands he won. Ryuu wanted to reach out to him, ask why he wasn't celebrating or looking down bashfully. All that stopped her was an odd feeling, as though she would break something. A feeling that, when looking at any words she yearned to say, persisted throughout all of them, ever watching and judging her next line. Finally, some approved letters were assigned properly and Ryuu felt as though she could speak again.
“I’m glad we could train together this morning, but I need to get ready for work. Shall we see each other tomorrow, or will your familia be busy?” Despite the affirmation behind them, her words only seem to dip Bell’s face and posture more. Was he upset, or exasperated, or angry? Ryuu honestly couldn’t tell.
“Tomorrow…. Yeah, we’ll see each other. Thank you Ryuu, I’ll…. see you…. tomorrow.” And Bell left the bar’s backyard with some fumbled words. Again, she wished to call out, and got reminded of her work schedule. So she pushed her worries aside with her sword and ditched both as her uniform called for her. They’ll see each other tomorrow and she’ll ask him then.
“Very well done Bell. I didn’t expect this training session to be so fruitful, but your progress is astounding as usual.” Ryuu couldn’t tell what was in Bell’s attacks today. Probably anger or desperation, but she’d known all about that and was confident in her ability to sense it. Maybe it was depression? He swung in lazy, open arches, but contemplating that made her annoyed that she lost to such a technique. Perhaps apathetic, which annoyed her just as much and was only saved because it’s Bell’s fault.
Why is she acting indignant? Ryuu faces the music and gets up from her defeat to congratulate Bell on beating her in battle. But something stops her, mainly the proof behind her description of “apathetic”. He looked almost bored. Not indifferent per se, more extremely tired. His arm swung lightly from its socket alongside the breeze, with his knife in an equally loose grip. His hair looks unnaturally disheveled, with loose strands flying about and attached ones curling about, overlapping as though he rolled out of bed into a tornado. Ryuu wanted to comment on it, but something stopped her. If Bell looked a bit better, she might have thought more about leaving him be, yet a whisper in her ear loudly demanded to retreat for another day. Ryuu agrees and promptly begins an out.
“I’m glad we could train together this morning, but I need to get ready for work. Shall we see each other tomorrow, or will your familia be busy?” No reaction. Bell knew what was behind her words. Or that’s what she feared when the normally expressive boy did nothing in return. The elf did need to get to work, that was not a lie he could detect.
“Tomorrow…. Yeah, we’ll see each other. Thank you Ryuu, I’ll…. see you…. tomorrow.” Bell oddly rasps out his only words during their time together and drags his body out of their training ground mind first. Ryuu immediately regretted her decision. It’s clear the boy was feeling down about something and no matter how his demeanor unnerved her bones, if he was in need then Ryuu helped him, as Bell had done for her. She’s suddenly inside, preparing her work uniform. When did she bathe to get the sweat and grime off? No matter. They’ll see each other tomorrow and she’ll ask him then.
“Very well done Bell. I didn’t expect this training session to be so fruitful, but your progress is astounding as usual.” Ryuu took pride in her ability to sense anger, despite all the anger she held herself to acquire that ability. And she wished her rader didn’t go off so soundly around Bell. He wasn’t a monster, but anyone else observing him would deem the name appropriate. He lashed out at her, hard, flailing his knives around without so much technique and more rabid fury, like a starving dog fighting for the last prey alive.
This wasn’t polite. No matter how miffed she was about losing, insulting her training partner was bad sportsmanship; so she stands up to offer her congratulations. Except she finds her tongue tied when looking at him. He was breathing heavily, clearly because he put his all into every movement today. He was also still in a combat position, a single wooden knife outheld in front of him with a straight lace back and knees, as if to provoke her into fighting more or even taunting by exposing his bad form. He wasn’t actually in a combat position, Ryuu noticed. Just everything about him today screamed danger to her. The senior warrior wanted to confront whatever plagues her partner, but not if he was going to snap at her. Verbally or otherwise. Something within her affirmed this sentiment. Bell would have to leave today.
“I’m glad we could train together this morning, but I need to get ready for work. Shall we see each other tomorrow, or will your familia be busy?” His face screamed unapproval, as his neutral line of a mouth bent into a frown and his eyes hardened in an instant. He was looking for another fight no doubt. She would stop him if he tried anything. In other words, Bell didn’t move an inch despite his desires.
“Tomorrow…. Yeah, we’ll see each other. Thank you Ryuu, I’ll…. see you…. Tomorrow.” He sounded tired all things considered, betraying his swift exit from their training ground as though fleeing from a nightmare. Ryuu walked upstairs and began to wash off the grime from today’s session. Truely a lot more than normal given the boy’s edge today. Ryuu wished she didn’t let Bell go; he was suffering no doubt and it was her duty to help him. She wished her thoughts stayed in check and she betrayed her gut instinct to hear him out. Her biggest wish was an answer to today’s fury. They’ll see each other tomorrow and she’ll ask him then.
“Very well done Bell. I didn’t expect this training session to be so fruitful, but your progress is astounding as usual.” Ryuu says that, but never in her life has she seen a person’s fighting ability degrade more. There wasn’t any passion in his attacks, she’s surprised there was even momentum given their weak follow throughs. Bell’s footwork, the only attribute that stood on par with her for the longest time, deflated into a cringy ballroom shuffle that Bell never learned. If her belief in the boy’s conviction wasn’t ironsolid, Ryuu would go as far to say her opponent aimed for a loss.
Never blame a fair winner though, so she promised herself to train before bed today while getting up to congratulate Bell. What stops her is his appearance. His eyes are watering despite the victory, his shoulders are tense, but arms at his side and unprepared for anymore fighting. From his arms, his hand is grasp tightly around the wooden knife like he’ll be pounding in a nail until the wooden tool cracks. Nothing about him is in place, and while Ryuu certainly admires Bell keeping his feelings on his sleeves, she’ll admit to being unprepared to deal with this much emotion so suddenly. Perhaps letting Syr handle him today would be more favorable. That girl will certainly notice Bell on his way out, so maybe Ryuu could stand back today so as to not embarrass the poor boy. Everything in her mind screamed this was wrong, that she needed to be there to assist him, but Ryuu’s soul knew this was correct.
“I’m glad we could train together this morning, but I need to get ready for work. Shall we see each other tomorrow, or will your familia be busy?” Bell wasn’t going to answer, was he? At least this prompted a single statement and goodbye, which the boy seemed tempted to play along with. He looked her in the eye for the first time in a while, and Ryuu swore she saw the universe in them.
“Tomorrow…. Yeah, we’ll see each other. Thank you Ryuu, I’ll…. see you…. Tomorrow.” He choked out his answer like it was seconds from killing him, affirming her previous guess of him being terribly down. Bell retreated into the bar with Ryuu standing around listlessly. She sadly left soon enough and began preparing for the day. Her soul had a shift in attitude apparently. Her heart as well, considering its uncontrolled beating. His voice, or maybe his gaze? Either way, she had to figure out what was wrong, no matter what. They’ll see each other tomorrow and she’ll ask him then.
“Very well done Bell. I didn’t expect this training session to be so fruitful, but your progress is astounding as usual.” It really was a good bout. She’s surprised he was able to overtake her, but his form was perfect, attacks and defenses well timed, and was probably aware of her feelings with the amount of attentiveness he demonstrated today. Ryuu brushed that thought from her mind, immensely ashamed she let it appear at all. Especially since his training for the sword princess was clearly getting results that encouraged him to keep trying.
She wouldn’t let jealousy win; she needed to congratulate the boy on his victory, but something stopped her. What stopped her, nothing was out of the ordinary? Bell looked a bit guarded during training, but his face loosened up at the sight of a win and had an almost smug smile. He relaxed his stance, clearly unprepared for her to strike again like he should be. Bell would never know if an opponent is really out until they're dead, so she’d remind him of that. Yep, nothing seems wrong, so why was she so hesitant to concede the loss. Was she actually jealous, and wanted to keep being Bell’s goal? Probably not. Yeah. Ryuu blew out her confusion in a sigh. Whatever her reason, she began looking for an ending to the session, lest her heart speak before her mind.
“I’m glad we could train together this morning, but I need to get ready for work. Shall we see each other tomorrow, or will your familia be busy?” Bell contemplated her words, seemingly checking his mental schedule for free time. His face fell seconds later, so an answer appeared faster than his words. No problem. Not at all.
“Tomorrow…. Yeah, we’ll see each other. Thank you Ryuu, I’ll…. see you…. Tomorrow.” Against her observations, Bell happily confirmed their appointment. Also against her observations was his dejected nature, slumping over and rubbing his head while he trudged out the door. Was something wrong? Why would he deflate so fast? Something told her to leave it be, leave it for someone like Syr who's more qualified. But a similar non-existent being shoved her forward, telling her to ask now. But why not tomorrow? Why not now? How many times had she ditched work to help this poor fool. How many more times would she in the future.
Ryuu's body felt shredded. Her head fogged up and pushed against her skull in a dull throb while throwing about any plans considered. A push and pull match between instincts, between feelings she couldn’t explain. Ryuu had no control over who would win. The world around her contrived, faded between pure black and white. People, pictures in the world begin to fade as well as the noise they made. Eventually, her control existed. Her arms moved the way she thought they would. So did her ears and eyes and fingers and toes and mouth. Her legs did too, after some time. Ryuu still felt awful, torn apart, but at least her actions would be her own.
“Bell!” Her voice sprung to life suddenly and came out louder than she hoped for. Resistance on both sides faded instantly and she felt unparalleled normality for the first time since her childhood. The white hair boy yelped before turning around instantly to face a new threat. “I… Let’s take a walk around town today.” Her body stumbled a bit, although she could pass for unafflicted well enough
Unaware of Ryuu’s emotional turmoil, Bell’’s face morphed from surprise to fear to unabashed happiness. “Yeah, sure!” He practically screamed out a lung. The bashful elf fought elation in favor of scolding Bell and then herself.
Of course, Bell’s turmoil was unknown to her as well. Perhaps she could ask him about it today.