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He was so pissed at first he couldn’t say anything. After the empty took cas dean screamed and cried. He never would admit that. He slumps against the walls and cries “you could have had what you wanted cas. I love you too.” He doesn’t know how long he sits there starring at the place cas was taken. He hears his phone ring but ignores it. Sam eventually comes and makes him leave the room.
It has been two weeks sense cas told him about his deal with the empty. He hasn’t left his room except to maintain basic hygiene and eat and to grab whiskey. He drinks a lot. He doesn’t know if he is trying to numb the pain or give himself alcohol poisoning. He is finally convinced by Sam to go on a hunt. There is a coven of vamps wearing creepy clown masks. His heart really isn’t in it. To be honest he wants to call another hunter to go in their stead but Sam is pretty insistent.
The hunt starts off ok and all is well until they realize the coven is bigger then the thought. They still manage to clear the nest but dean now has a piece of rusty rebar stuck in his back. “Sammy, don’t. No more coming back.” Dean knows his son could heal him and keep him alive, hell he is god after all. But dean is ready for the highlight reel that is heaven. It means he gets to see cas again because cas is in so many of his best moments.
“Dean, no...”
“Damn it Sam! I mean it I am ready. It is ok. Go be normal, have a family and get married”
They sit in silence as he dies.
Dean is in heaven, looks like he is at some cabin or something. Bobby is there waiting for him. They talk and have a beer. Dean is trying to remember this place but he can’t. “ where are we Bobby? I don’t remember this place.”
“That’s cause the boy of your made heaven open. It isn’t the rerun of your greatest hits like it use to. This is my place your folks are a few miles from here in that direction. Jack wanted to give you the heaven you deserved. The heaven as it always should have been”
“Jack did all this?’
“Cas helped.”
Dean doesn’t know what pisses him off more the knowing look Bobby gave him when he mentioned cas or the fact that cas was out of the empty and didn’t tell him.
“ Cas is out of the empty?”
“Yea he is... didn’t the idjit tell you?”
“Where?”
“Few miles north.... don’t worry I am sure he will wait, go do what you need to and dean.... Sam will be along soon, time passes differently up here.”
Dean gets into baby and drives. He needs a minute to let go of the anger and hurt he felt that cas didn’t tell him he was alive. Not that he can really blame him he didn’t actually give him any hope that he felt the same. Damn it, why did he inherit the ability to process his emotions from his dad? All he knew how to do was get revenge if his family got hurt and drink away all the other feelings. It seems like he had been driving only a few minutes, barely enough time to process his feelings and come to grips with the fact he wants to go find cas when he feels a familiar presence entering heaven and he stops on a bridge. Sam walks up beside dean. With out looking dean says “ hey Sammy” “ hey dean”
They stair out to the beautiful scenery for a few minutes before dean feels like it is a little to chick flicky and says “get in bitch” Sam replies “jerk” and climes into the front seat of baby. Dean turns around and heads north now ready to face cas, he just has to deal with Sam first.
“Did you know jack brought cas back Sammy?”
“Yeah, he helped me out of a few hunts shortly after you passed, haven’t you seen him?”
“What?! That dick.... No he hasn’t dropped by... not that I was even here that long.”
“Dean... you have been gone for 40 years.”
“Not up here... time passes different... anyone you want to see? Mom and dad are about ten minutes away...”
Sam interrupts “ dean do you know where my wife Eileen is?”
“Wait... you and Eileen got married?”
“ yeah and had two kids dean and Mary”
“No... I don’t, we can ask jack”
After dean said that jack popped into the back seat.... “ Eileen is at you parents Sam. They are all waiting for you both”
“Jack..”
“No dean cas isn’t there. If I understand correctly he feels a bit embarrassed I think... I have to go” jack quickly left.
Sam looks at dean “ok two questions why all of a sudden do you want to know where cas is and why would he be embarrassed?”
Dean turns red and stairs at the road ahead. “He told me he loved me before the empty took him. I didn’t get the chance to say anything”
Sam is silent for a minute and takes it in “what would you have said?”
“That I love him too...” as they pull on to the road that leads to their parents cabin dean says “don’t tell mom and dad.”
Sam chuckles “mom already knew... you were not subtle with the eye fucking.”
“What? How do you know mom knows?”
“She asked me... apparently there was some pretty intense feelings in the atmosphere of the bunker when you introduced mom to cas. She asked and I said that yeah you like him but I don’t think it is going anywhere.”
“And she was ok with me being... interested in men?”
“Yea no problem on her end or mine dean. If dad as a problem we will handle it.”
They pull up to the house and dean turns baby off and is about to get out when Sam reaches over and stops him “dean, go get your Angel I will tell them you will come along in a few”
“Bitch”
“Jerk”
And with that Sam runs up to the door and goes inside to be with his parents and wife. Dean sends out a prayer to jack... “Jack... I need your help” he barely finishes his prayer when the passenger door opens and jack asks what he can help him with “take me to cas” jack puts his hand on dean’s shoulder and take him to a park where Dean can see a man flying a kite and a dark haired man sitting on a bench watching and enjoying the peace. Dean can tell it is cas but he is wearing... is that one of dean’s flannel shirts? And a new pair of jeans? Dean smiles and walks up as sits on the bench and says “hey cas”
“Dean?” A worried smile come across the face of his Angel
“Why the hell have you not come to find me cas?”
“I thought...” dean interrupts cas by kissing him he pulls away and simply says “wrong” cas kisses dean back “I am glad” kiss “sams here” kiss “I know” kiss “at my parents” kiss “yep” kiss “there is a party” kiss “right” kiss “come” kiss “ok”. They kiss again for a while exploring each other’s mouth with their tongues before finally cas breaks the kiss with a sigh “if we are going to your parents party we should get going.”
“Right... by the way is that my shirt?”
Cas blushes and reply’s “yea.”
“It looks good on you.”
Dean stands up and reaches his hand towards cas’ hand intertwining their fingers before cas flys them to his parents porch. He gives cas a quick kiss “are you ready to meet everyone?”
“Dean I have already meet almost everyone in there.”
“Not like this you haven’t.” Dean plants a chaste kiss on his Angel.
“Is that different?”
“A little bit yeah”
He smiles and walks in to see his family but stops when he feels tension on the hand holding cas’. He turns and sees a look of apprehension on his angels face. He returns that look with one of concern “what is...”
“How... why is it different Dean?”
“Because.... well I hope we are more then friends so it becomes more significant having dinner with my family. Don’t worry though mom and Sammy already know... apparently we are the most clueless people ever and not very subtle about the fact we love each other. Apparently we were the only ones who didn’t know.”
“Jack said the same thing.” cas laughed.
Dean smiled at him “ok are you ready now?”
Cas leaned in and gave him i quick kiss “I guess.”
They walk in holding hands. Everyone that dean cares about is there now.
As they walked around saying hi to everyone there was several “finally” s mumbled and of course Bobby called them idjits for taking so long. They were still a few more people left to greet and one of those was John Winchester.
As they approached his parents cas made the attempt to let his hand go but dean spent to long being stupid to let any second pass.They had their backs to them talking to Sam and Eileen. His dad didn’t seem the tense and harsh man he had come to associate with his dad. In fact he was laughing, dean can’t remember his dad ever laughing. Sam saw dean stiffen behind them and gave him an encouraging smile.
His dad noticed and turned around to see his oldest son holding hands with the Angel who raised the new god. His face went cold and dean froze but didn’t let cas’ hand go.